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The Calhoun Times. Volume I. I Uj; CALHOUN I OILS. rY mi IWDAT MORNING, 11Y UASKiy & MARSHALL. Terms of Subscription* v„r S S S s $2.00 one : : : 1.00 Kates of Advertising. 1 BTMogT~G~MOH. 1 yea r. 1 .. 000 10.00 18.00 85.00 | 0.00 15.00 30.00 40.00 “T 15 00 25.00 40.00 85.00 { „ 25.00 40.00 65.00 115.00 \TI subscriptions are payable strictly in i ml at the expiration of the time ' , mic’h payment is made, unless pre viously renewed, the name of the subscriber ' ni be stricken from our books. for each square of ten lines or less, for the (■■• insertion, sl, and for each subsequent insertion, fifty cents. Ten lines of solid lirevier, or its” equivalent in space, make a cash, before or on demaud after the first insertion. advertisements under the head of .Special Notices, ‘twenty cents per line for first in sertion, and tea cents cat*#! subsequent inser-j l column lion. - 11 All communications on matters of public interest will meet with prompt attention, and concise letters on general subjects are re spectfully solicited from all parts of the country. ILRO AHB. Western A Atlantic. night passkxgku'tiui.y—outward. I, five Atlanta «45 P. M. Arrive at, Calhoun 11.21 A. M. Arrive at Chattanooga 2.45 a. it HAY rABSKMIE.It THAIN —OUTWARD. J, Atlanta 8 15 a. m Arrive at Calhoun 1.9 p. m. Arrive at Chattanooga 5.30 P. it. ACCOMOI) TION TKAIN—OUTWARD. leave Atlanta 530 p. M. Arrive at Dalton 8.30 P. m. night passenger train —inward. I ;iv« Clifti tanooga 7 50 p. m. jt’Tive at Oftlhonn 11.21 p. m. Aniveat Atlanta 4.00 A. M. DAY PASSENGER TRAIN —INWARD. >iv> Ch ittanoo-a 5.30 A. m. Drive at Calhoun 944 a. m Drive at Atlanta -3.00 P. M. accomodation train- inward. rive Pa'ton 2 00 p. M. tiro'e at Atlan'a 11.00 A. m. PROFESSIONAL CARDS. W. S. JOHNSON, \ttoriio.v .A.t JLisa/W, CAL 110 GY, GEORGIA. 1 >.li • ■ Southeast corner of the ■tint JL’iise. I 1 ts I IN. .ms. .m'conneu,. i§ un a sit McConnell, Vttoiiie.v« sxt Law, CAUIOI'X GEORGIA. I ,■ odijc in the Court House. big 11 1 ts w. j. canthellT Vi(<n*iu\v V 1 Law. (’.VbIIOUN, Georgia. IfH.l. I’licticc in the Cherokee Circuit, ’ in I’. S. District Court, Northern IMs ■ i of D 'orgia, (at Atlanta); and in the Su ■’’mo t'ouvt of the State of Georgia. ■ Ptoo re, W. R. Rankiv, f VaiwtU 0* Calhoun, Oa I PHILLIPS & RANKIN, ATTOItXEYS AT LAW, —AND— jCOIUCtINO A£r£l'lTS, B CaVtoun, Ga. ■ ' "'L practice in tlio Courts of the Circuit. ■ eTj. kiker, X.*g\TKr, CAUIOCX, GEORGIA. 0 C[/l Stand of Cantrell Kiker.] potetkee in all the Courts of the 1 lerokee Circuit: Supreme Court of , 1:m 1 'hr l nited States District Court PI auglOTOly j^. m ASCctsrtlxx.,, A TTORXEY AT LA IT, ■hloneqa, geo. 1870 ts fun reeves; ■ s <!i\yc'jn <£• Physician, P4LUOT T v IN i - - - GEOROIA, ‘G found at his office, in the Brick ■ W htKiz, Barrett A: Cos., day H W-i'liva not professionally engaged ■ 'U'Jh’Titf ° ■'JFE WALDO THORNTON. niINTIST. I* 1 ”. - A. C vi i !. for'ormcr patronage, solicits ■ “continuance of the same. Residence. sepls fR. D. C. HUNT, ■'M'daii and Druggist, K GA. J - i>. Tinsley; " ATCH-MAKER L'^^VELEH., ■ - V ' • : GEORGIA. Hj' s ■ ■ o n ,.im ‘A ( locks. Watches and Jewelry ; u ',p warranted. I IX 1855.) lO.MATHEWSQN, l*' l mission merchant I 'I'OCSTA, GEORGIA. ! 1870 1 y ROME ADVERTISEMENTS. “Homo Asnin.” J. C. RAWLINS, Prop’r. CHOICE HOTEL* BROAD ST., ROME, OA. Passengers taken to and from the Depot Free of Charge. oct67otf TENNESSEE HOUSE", ROME, GEORGIA, J. A. STANSBURY, Proprietor. rilHli above Hote* is located within Twenty I Steps of tha Railroad Piattorua. Baggage handled freeot Charge. o :tC7otf ~.r - " . -11. ' T ' ALBERt G. PITOER. HENRY H. SMITH. PITNER & SMITH, Wholesale and Retail Grocers & Commission Merchants AND DEALERS IN PURE KENTUCKY WHISKIES,&c. No. 25, Corner Broad & Howard sts., ROME, - - GEORGIA. 0ct6,1870-ly Bones, Tco.\ * Augusta, Ga. Rome, Ga. Established 1825. Established 18G9. J. &S. BONES & CO. H/OME, GA. IMPORTERS Wholesale Dealers HARDWARE, CUTLERY, QUfIS, &C. WILL offer for sale, the coming season : bo r* Tons Swedes Iron, 75 Tons “Jenks” Plow Steel, A LARGE LOT OF Imported Cutlery and Piles, Together with a full assortment of GEN II UAL HARDWARE. WE are Agents for R. HOB & CO'S. Pat ent Inserted Tooth Circular Saws; Machine Belting, Orange Rifle Powder, and Rome Iron Manufacturing Co’s. Merchant Bar Iron and Nails. All of above to compete with any House South. marl7’7l 3m SWimmsrs so tii (Central Position of the City.) Nos. 95 and 97 Broad Street, Rome. Ga. FIRST CLASS FARE OPEN AT ALL HOURS! (!-!?■ Free Omnibus to &. Fine Bar and Billiard Saloon attached. Give me a call. J. 11. Coleman, Prop’r. april 6-1 y. NEW LIYERY STABLE. 1 lodges & ]\ lay. 31 A 1 VS OL I) STA Y!), LUXE Stock and good Vehicles al- E ways on hand. Rest attention paid to customers’ animals. Satisfaction guar anteed. Give us a call at the old Brick Stable. Broad Street, Rome, Ga. apr.6-3m. M. Menko, Bro, & Cos. — Dealers in STABLE FANCY DRY GOODS, Clothing, Boots and Shoes, Hats, Caps, Trunks, &c. Liberal inducements offered to counti-y mer chants. 28 Whitehall st., 2 doors from Ala bama street, (next to .lack s Confectionery,) Atlanta, Ga. sept2o’7o-6m "#8*3,000 In Cash Gifts to be Distibutcd by (be New,York Cash Prize Cos. Every Ticket Draws a Prize! 5 cash gifts, each, $40,000 10 “ “ “ 20,000 20 « “ “ 5.000 50 “ “ “ i.ooo 200 •« “ “ 500 350 “ « “ 100 50 Elegant Rosewood Pianos, S3OO to S7OO <‘s “ “ Melodeous, 75 to 100 350 Sewing Machines, 60 to 175 500 Gold watches, 75 to 300 Cash prizes, siver ware. &c. val’d at 1000.000 A chance to draw any of the above prizes for 25c. Tickets describing Prizes are sealed in Envelopes and well mixed. On receipt of 25c. a Sealed Ticket is drawn without choice acd sent by mail to any address. The prize named upon it will be delivered upon pay ment of One Dollar. Prizes are immediately sent to any address by express or return mail You will know what your prize is before you pay for it. Any prize exehenged for an other of the same value. No blanks. Our pat rons can depend on fair dealing. References:— The following lately drew Valuable prizes and kindly permit us to pub lish them: Andrew J. Burns, Chicago. $lO,- 000; Miss Ola 1 a Walker, Baltimore, Piano, $800; .Tas. M. Mathews, Detroit, $5,000; JohnT. Anderson, Savannah, $5,050; James Simmons, Boston, SIO,OOO. Press Opinions: —‘The firm is reliable.’— Weekly Tribune , Dee. 28. ‘Deserve their suc cess.'—X 1~ Herald. Jan. 1. ‘Just and hon orable.’—Xeics, Dec. 9. Send for circular. Liberal inducements to agents. Satisfaction guaranteed. Every package of 200 sealed Envelopes contains one cash gift. Seven tickets for $1; 17 for v- ;50 for $5; 200 for sls. Address, IIENRY C. LEE & CO.. Managers, 78 & 80 Broadway. N. Y. HETTEKTON’ FOEi) & Cos", WHOLESALE HEAI-EHS IN’ BRAHES, WHISKIES, Wines, Tobaccos, Cigars, &e., No. 209. MARKET ST., No. 209. CHATTANOOG A. TENN. 0ct18.1870-1 y CALHOUN, GA„ THURSDAY. MAY 18. 1871. TIN-WARE Aim Cooking Stoves ! W.T.KALL&BRO., ITTCHILD inform the public that they are Si prepared to fill all orders in the Tin-Ware Line, At as LOW PRICES as any similar estab lishment in Cherokee Georgia. Our work is put up by experienced work men, and will compare favorably with any in the country. O In these days of Freedom, every good husband should see that the “goot wife” is supplied with a good Oooil2L:i3Ajߣ Stovo, And We are prepared to furnish any size or style desired at the Lowest Possible Prices. Give us a cal!. aull,tf A. W. DEALER IX DRY-HOODS, NOTIONS, Boots, Shoes, Hats, Groceries, Hardware, Queensware, &c., MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS, FACTORY YARNS, SHIRTINGS, AND READY-MADE CLOTHING, FAMILY GROCERIES, LIQUORS, cfco. Railroad Street, - - CALHOUN, OA. Has just received and constantly receiv ing, a fresh supply of BACON, LARD, FLOUR, MEAL, SUGAR, COFFEE, RICE, CIGARS, TOBACCO, CONFECTIONERIES, Canned Fruits, Nuts, Oysters, SARDINES, CHEESE, &c. And, in fact, a full and complete assortment of Staple and Fancy Groceries, lie also keeps one of the best Stocks of WINES & LIQUORS, in this part of the- country. If you want good, fresh Groceries, or Fine Old Whiskies, Brandies, or M ines, give me a call. febl6’7l6m J. H. ARTHUR, DEALER IM STAPLE AND FAXCY DRE GOODS, Cutlery, Notions &c, Also keeps constantly on hand a choice stock of FAMILY GROCERIES, In all of which purchasers are offered in ducemeuts.to buy. Auglll 6m J. N. R. COBB. JXO. W. WALKER. COBB 1 WALKER, AGENTS FOR mi & BAKER'S CELEBRATED SEWING MACHINE. Every Machine Warranted to keep in good running order. ALSO AGENTS FOR GEN. LEE MEMORIAL ASSOCIATION. G. M. HUNT, Calhoun, Georgia, is author ized to transact all our business during our absence. marl6-6m CHEROKEE MAIMING 111.. D ALT OX, GA. Manufactures all Kinds of FITIOa-ITim.E3, Os the best material this country affords, and very superior in style and workmanship, which they offer to the public and the gen eral trade, as low as can be afforded. Chairs & Bedsteads a Speciality. Blinds, Doors, Sash and Job Work, to or der, on short notice. Dr. D. G. Hunt is our Agent at Calhoun, Ga., and keeps a good supply of Furniture on band. J. W. WALKER, Sup't. L. D. Palmer, Secretary. aug26’7o-ly DISSOLUTION NOTICE. 11HE copartnership heretofore existing un . der the firm name of Ballew & Marshall, is this day dissolved by mutual consent—-J. W. Marshall retiring. The books of the firm are in the hands of A. W. Ballew, who will close up all the business of the late firm. A. W. Ballew J. W. Marshall. Read Further! I propose to continue the business at the old stand, and am determined at all times to keep a full and first-class stock. feb 16,1 m Af AY. BALLEW. G. H. & A. W. FORCE, SIGN OF TIIE BIG IRON BOOT, Whitehall Street, : : : Atlanta, Ga. lIOOTS, Shoes and Trunks, a complete Stock ) and new Goods arriving daily! Gents’ Boots and Shoes, of the best makes. Ladies’ Shoes of ad kinds. Boys, Misses and Children’s Shoes of every g'-trie and make. l-fT" We are prepared to offer inducements to Wholesale Trade. sepi‘2 ’,70-ly ANY QUANTITY" of “Fine Virginia Leaf ” and Manufactured Tobaccos at DeJOURNETT & SON S, Cor. Broad & Bridge sts., Home, Take your home paper. JL N W M -rd JL A « Written for the Calhoun Times. RESIGNATION. I’ve watched for thy dear presence, lore, Through dark and dreary To come with joyful steps along * The old familiar ways; * Those days have lengthened weeks. And still thou artmot here,/ The whole world is dark to me. Though sunshine everywhere I’ve yearned for thy dear warm clasp, j*.- Written Anil for thy dear lips' smile.* And O, for those dark radial/ ej-os, My sad heart to And vet in vain from casen^^high, I gaze adown the street, ■ Still hoping with my breaking he&ft, That dear, dear face to gret. The hours still ’ But thou—whom I so lcngt^C.^ Thou comest not again. *■- rn ,0 Although thou knowest the days to me, Are fraught with weary pain— Although thou knowest I watch for thee, Thou comest not again. The summer flowers may bloom and fade, The grass grow brown ar.d sear What chai’ms can nature hold for me ? Thou art no longer here. Yes summer flowei’s may bloom and fade, And autumn leaves may fall, "Would God their searest ones could be My lone graves dreai-y palh It may be that anothei-’s smile Has won thy heart from me; If so, may God as kindly judge, As I wish joy to thee— No not one angiy thought shall brim Life’s cup of bitter o’er, For love like mine can know no change, It lives forevei'moi’e. MISCIiIIiLANY. A Home. If we were to tell a number of our friends that they don’t know what a “home” is, they would grow somewhat in dignant—perhaps use hard words. And yet it may be remarked that the number of persons who know what a genuine home is, by experience, is surpassingly few. One man in good circumstances will tell us that he has a fine house of his own, in which every comfort and convenience are provided. He has a wife ard child tLere r-.Uo, aad U -K give life to the place. Very true. But does he prefer that home, thus furnished and thus enlivened, to every other place in the world ? Does he sigh when the hour of leaving comes, and smile when he is permitted to return ?” Does he love to sit by the cheerful fire and fon dle the children entering into all their little disputes with curious interest ? Does he take particular note of the bird in the cage, and cat near the fire ? If not, he has no home, in the dearest sense of that dearest of words. If his mind is altogether absorbed in the dusty ways of business, if he hurries from the house in the morning and is loth to return at night—if, while he is at home he continues to think of the journal and ledger, and repulses the advances of the prattling children he has no home; he only has a place where he lodges and takes his meals. Ah ! happy is he who knows and ap preciates the full bliss of home, whose heart is warned and humanized by its cheerful influences, and who feels how superior in purity of pleasure are all its enjoyments to the turmoil delights of outdoor life. Thrice happy is such a man. lie has discovered the only Par adise this world can afford. It is only such a man who can have a deep and sincere pity for the unfortunate crea tures who are homeless. He regards them as being cut off' from the best in fluence of the earth, and exposed to the action of all the darker waves of life. He feels keenly for him who has no fire side—no dear one to welcome with smiles, and prattle over the little his tory of the day—no tongue to soothe when heavy cares have troubled the mind and the sympathy of such a man is not slow to overflow in acts of benevolence. A good home is the source of the foun tain of charity in the heart. Our advice to those who have no homes such as we have described above, is, to get them as soon as possible.— They can never be contented and sub stantial citizens, nor thoroughly happy men, until they follow this counsel. — Get homes ! Fill them with objects of love and endearment, and seek there for the pure delights which the world be side cannot afford. “It is a striking fact that the dying never weep. The sobbing, the.heart breaking agony of the circle of friends around the death-bed call forth no re sponsive tears from the dying. Is it because lie is insensible, and stiff in the chill of dissolution ? That cannot be, for he asks for his father’s hand, as if to gain strength in the mortal struggle, and oil the breast of bis mother, sister or brother, in still conscious affection. Just before expiring, he calls the loved ones, and with quivering lips says, ‘ Kiss me,’ showing that the love which he has ever born in bis heart is still fresh and warm. It must be because the dying have reached a point too deep for earthly sorrows, too transcendent for weeping. They are face to face with higher and holier things, with the Father in Heaven and llis angels There is no weeping in that blessed abode to which ho is hast ening.” Death of the King of Pain. A WonJer/nl Quack —fits Career — Graph ic Sketch. The story of the “King of Pain,” otherwise a quack doctor, named Mc- Bride, who was well known in various portions of this State, some years ago, is told at length by an Indianapolis eor respondent of the New York Evening Leader, lie was a tall, graceful young reilow, with much hair arid an xxiimis takable appearance of quackery in his looks and actions ; but he made money very fast. His “ King of pain,” as his worthless stuff was labeled, was war ranted to cure anything from toothache to consumption. He went about with it in an exaggerated wagon and with an accompaniment of music, scattering-his small bixls with much looseness find har anguing the crowds thgJt, curiously fol lowed him. Ynown, the corres pondent tel I */ ! [ ISj from the coast of Maine to tb'v 1 ’ a Uific. from the St. Lawrence to Grande, lie got along excel lently as long as he attended to his le gitimate, or rather illegitimate business; but finally be acquired a passion for gambling. He Was lucky with his first ventures, which were made in Indianap olis, and this turned his head, so that at times he would abandon his business altogether, and remain at the faro table day and night. We quote from the ac count : On one occasion he began a gambling excursion in Chicago, then came on here. In both places he was fortunate, and followed up his luck in Louisville and Cincinnati. His wagon and six fol lowed him wherever he went, hut he gave hardly any attention to that busi ness. In the two cities we have men tioned he still went on pursuing his luck, which pursued him. When he went on a Mississippi steamboat to pro ceed to New Orleans he had some SHO,- 000 in his pocket, which he increased sailing down the river. He arrived in New Orleans, where ho again bucked the tiger, but here his luck seemed to desert him. He played his money and gradually lost it. After his money was gone to the last cent, he played his watch and jewels, of which he had a great number, and lost them. Then he played his wagon and horses and lost them. After that he borrowed as much money as be could possibly get together and played that, and again lost, until he was “laid perfectly flat.” For some time he wandered about the Crescent City, living from hand to mouth. Then he made a little stake, and, apprehensive of losing that, took a berth in a steamship to New York. There he opened some place on Broadway, where he made an other pile of money. He began patron izing the green table again, and bis luck turned to him. It there that one day I saw him give a poor girl with whom he became casually acquainted, a roll of bills amounting to $3,700, upon condition that she would leave the city and turn to a virtuous course of life. I Was present at the time, and remon strated with him on his rather extrava gant piece of generosity, lie answered, “I won it in four nights, at faro, and if I can do a worthy deed with the infer nal money, why shouldn’t I? I'll make up for it in deviltry before another week passes.” And so he did. He was a habitual lounger in houses of ill fame, where he would spend hundreds of dol lars in a night. Then he would go to playing again, and perhaps some drink ing the next day, and in all this turmoil arid excitement found time for business. At length business grew dull in New York, and he determined to start once more on his travels in his wagon and six. In this way he again found his way to this city, where he was suddenly prostrated by his life of excitement.— Only three days ago he took to his bed, never to rise from it again. Reckless, immortal, an empiric, a gambler, a roue, but with a kind heart, he lingered on the verge of death, and last night quietly passed away. The cause of his death is supposed to be some affection of the lungs. Financially, the career of this man was an entire success; yet ho was one of the most transparent rogues that ever gulled a confiding public. He boasted publicly that he was a humbug; but his wagon was surrounded continually, often by those who had heard the boast, and after a little music and a speech they would buy eagerly. The fact is not a pleasant one; and we suppose this men tion of it will be more of an advertise ment than anything eise for the fellow that takes the great charlatan’s place. .. -« » “Forget Him.” A Republican paper in this city said the best thing for General Lee would be for the people to forget him. The Radicals would like to forget him; but will General Grant, will Gen eral Hooker, will General Burnside, will General McClellan forget him ? Can the heights of Fredericksburg be sunk into the chasm of an ear earthquake to please Burnside? Will the Wilderness ever be named now as a victorious field of his, or the red field of Spotteylvania grow laurels for Grant ? Will Cold Harbor be aught less than the point where the boasted line was shattered and the commander of a nation, not an army, forced by this Lee to follow in the plans of the hated and abused McClellan. Lee fought all these battles against large odds, aud whipped these who, of course, would now like to have his name obliterated, and their disgrace go with : him iu his grave. Rut the worst thing for this country i to do would be to forget Lee, aud that I she had a son so great and good. He will pass over the spasm of their niock eries, and their attempts at forgetful ness, and all the wrougs to him and to us here, now to this Northern people stabbed nearly to death by the same that beat down the banners of the South, and his memory will be quoted by ora tors in behalf of oppressed nationalities, and the youth of tho country be stimu lated by the chaste heroism of the great A irginian to attempt to save, as he died, the ark of freedom from the hands of the destroyer. The spirit of public and private vir tue, of morality in politics, and purity iu religion, will nut willingly let die ■ name so illustrious and so re proach. Defeat may postpone, but out rtf the tombs of great warriors wilt couie ar.\ iu spiration, that will, in the end, save the country from military despotism.—Pv:n eroy's Democrat. The Bible. The Book of God is full of treasures. Aim at possessing them. It is full of warnings. Seriously attend to them. It is full of holy examples, faithfully to follow them. It describes what Christ has done for us. Acquaint yourself with him and he will give you peace.— Be assured there is no hope for you t ut in his precious death ; there is uo help for you but in his converting power ; nor can you attain the measure of real holiness without the aid of Ins all sulti cient grace. Four grand arguments for the truth of the Bible are—the miracles it records, the prophecies, the goodness of the doc trine, and the moral character of the penmen. The bible must be the inven tion either of good men or angels, bad men, or devils, Or a revelation from God. It could not be the invention of good men or angels; for they neither would nor could make a book, and tell lies all the time they were writing it, saying, “Thus saith the lord,” when it was their own invention. It could not be the invention of had men or devils ; for they would not make a book which commands all duty, forbids all sin, and condemns their souls, to hell, to till eternity. It must have been given by Divine inspirations, for its various parts, though written in different and distinct ages by men of «uch diversified character and training are perfect harmony with each other. It reveals a religion that satisfies all the wants of those who embrace it and makes them victorious over the power of death. Why He Didn’t Go. The Superintendent asked me to take charge of a Sunday School class. “You’ll find them rather a bad lot,” said he. “ They all went fishing last Sunday but little Johnny Rand. He is really a good boy, and I hope his ex ample may yet redeem the others. 1 wish you would talk to ’em a little. I told him I would. They were rather a hard looking set. I don’t think I ever witnessed a more elegant set of black eyes in my life.— Little Johnny Rand, the good little boy, was in his place, and I smiled on him approvingly. ‘ As soon as the lessons were over I said : “ Boys, your Superintendent tells me you went fishing last Sunday—all but little Johnny here. You didn’t go, did you, Johnny ?” I said. “ No, sir.” “ That was right. Though this boy is the youngest among you,” I contin ued; “you learn from his own lips words of good counsel, which I hope you will profit by.” I lifted him up on the seat beside me, and smoothed his auburn riuglets. “Now, Johnny, i want you to tell these wicked boys why you didn’t go fishing with them last Sunday: Speak up loud now. It was because it was very wicked, and you had rather go to Sunday school, wasn’t it?” “No, sir; it was ’cos I couldn’t find no worms for bait!” As A specimen of the precocity of certain classes of American youth who know more than their “daddies,” we have this of a little street vagabond who was recently brought up before one of the lower courts, to testify in an assault and battery case: “ Where do you live ?” said the Judge “Live with my mother.” “Where does your mother live?” “She lives with father.” “ Where does your father live?” “ He lives with the old folks.” “Where do they live?” said the Judge getting very red, as an audible snicker went round the room. “They live at home.” “ Where in the thunder is their home ?” roared the Judge. “ That’s where I’m from,” said the boy. sticking his tongue in the corner of his cheek and slowly closing one eye on the Judge. “ Here, Mr. Constable,” yelled the court’ “ take the witness and tell him to travel. He evidently does not know the nature of an oath ” “ You’d think differently,” said the boy, going toward the door, “if 1 haJ, given you a cussin: ” ——— , A jealous lover, in Missouri. ea.Fl lenged bis rival, and was dumbfounded by the latter accepting the challenge and naming “pistols at ten paces.' — “Give me thirty days for practice,” said the challenger. “Not a day,” was the response. ‘ Oh. then take your gal and go to thunder with her,” indignantly exclaimed the warlike youth, as he started for home. Number <4-0. Various Items* i Under foot—The earth. The bosom friend—Cotton. The Russian Emperor gets drunk. Relative beauty—a pretty cousin. Powder is a nice tiling—in a horn. Port Carbon h*»*r a forty-three-ycaf old-hen. <«/.*■.,’ fi~7l ~ \ Flow •'-* that are always falling on— buttons * A woman down town took castor oil, to keep it from spoiling. To cure deafness—Tell a man you’ve conic to pay him money. Law is the buoy of the good fcitiiert —the rock of the bad one. One measure in which all civilized nations agree—The churchyard. When is an umbrella like a person convalescent ? When it is recovered. Ducks have decided opinions of their own—they always come out flat-footed. When a petulant individual observes to you “You had better eat me up-, hadn’t you ?”—don’t you do it. Juvenile —“Mother says will yoii give her small change for a dollar. She’ll send the dollar in to-morrow.” A Connecticut sc hool boy has writ ten a composition on a horse, in which he says it is an animal with four legs-, ‘ one at each corner.” Mrs. Eddy, of Lincoln, caught het 1 better half kissing the servant girl.— The doctor was sent for. He says he can patch up Mr. Eddy’s face, but he'll always be bald-headed. Now it is rumored that Pap Dent, the father-ili-law of tile administration is about to wed Mrs. Smith, widow of the late John. This suggests a dreadful possibility, if ail that family have got to be provided for. Asa companion-piece to the song: “O give me back but yesterday,” a mel ody will soon be issued entitled, “Oh j could I spare to-morrow,” which will be followed by “ Have you such a thing as next week about you ?” “ Come, Rob,” said an indulgent father to his hopeful, son, the other morning, “ remember it is the early bird catches the worm.” What do I care for worms?” replied the young hopeful) “ mother won’t let me go a fishing.” At a school at Newcastle the master asked a class of boys the meaning of the word “appetite.” After a short pause, one little boy said, “ I know. sir 5 when I'm Gatin' I'm 'nppy, .and when I’m done I’m tight.” “I say, hoy, is there anything td shoot around here ?” inquired a sports* man of a boy he met. “ Well,” replied the boy, “nothing just about hero, but our school master is just over the hill there cutting birchrods, you might walk up and pop him over. A correspondent in Solith Carolina says that a station where the train stop* ped “ a young African gent gently jerked tily coat tail, saying, ‘ Mister, did this here train bring airy letter from Glen Cannon to Bill Shore’s wife?' I gave it up. An individual who was puzzled to know where all the Smiths came from has, at last solved the mystery. At Waterbury Conn., on a long factory, ap pears a sign inscribed, “Smith’s Manu facturing Company.” A gentleman saw an advertisement that a recipe for the cure of dyspepsia m’ght be had by sending a postage stamp to the advertiser. He sent hisstamp, and the answer was “'Dig in your garden and let whiskey alone.” A woman committed suicide by hang ing herself to aft apple tree. At the funeral, a neighbor, noticing the sad ap pearance of the husband, consoled him by saying that he had mot with a terri ble loss. “Yes,” says the husband, heaving a sigh ; she must have kicked like thunder to shake off six bushels of green apples that would have been worth a dollar a bushel when they get ripe.” Looking Out tor Slights. —There are some people—yes, many people—’al ways -looking out for slights. They can not pay a visit,they C-innot even receive a friend, they ernnot carry on the daily intercourse of the family without sus pecting some offense is designed. They areas touchy as hair triggers. If they meet an acquaintance on the street who happens to be preoccupied with business, they attribute his abstraction to motive personal to themselves, and take umbrage accordingly. They lay on others the fault of their own irrita biiity. A fit of indigestion makes them see impertinence in everybody they come in contact with. Innocent persons, who never dreamed of giving offense, arc as tonished to find some unfortunate, or some momentary taciturnity, mistaken for an insult. To say the least, the habit is unfortu nate. It is far wiser to take the more Heritable vi fellow beings,and mot. smtintended unless we direct. After its hue, iu a degree, fromthe ct/Wrof our own mind. If wc are frank and generous, the world treats us kindly. If, on the contrary, we are suspicious, men learn to be cold and cautious to us. Let a person get the reputation of being touchy, aud ev erybody is utuier wore or less restraint j and in this way the chances of an im aginary offense are vastly increased.