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MOVIE DOPE. by BALLARD LESEMANN THE ADVENTURES OF ROCKY AND BULLWINKLE (PG) Based on Jay Ward's original ‘Rocky And Bullwinkle’ cartoons ot the late-1960’s, this weak big-screen version is an unwatchable disappointment. Director Des McAnuff's blend ol computer ani mation mostly looks forced and stiff; and Jason Alexander, Rene Russo and Robert De Niro all look ridiculous and embarrassed. Ends Thursday (Mall) AUTUMN IN NEW YORK (PG-13) A romantic tear-jerker peppered with moments of comedy about an aging New York playboy (Richard Gere) who falls in love “for the first time’ with a sweet young woman (Winona Ryder). With the inevitably thuggish Anthony LaPaglia and the wonderfully cranky Elaine Stntch. Directed by Joan Chen and written by Allison Burnett. Opens Friday. (Beechwood, Carmike) BIG MOMMA’S HOUSE (PG-13) Martin Lawrence goes “deep under cover’ in this crude comedy about a slick city detective who poses as an obese Georgia grandmother. This is a derivative comply consisting of little more than a continuous string of gags and one-liners revolving around the same |Oke. but audiences are howling anyway. Starts Friday. (Mall) BLESS THE CHILD (R) A tense looking supernatural thriller about a six- year-old girl (newcomer Holliston Coleman) with extraordinary, possibly- otherworldly powers who may be “mankind's last hope." With Kim Basinger. Jimmy Smits. Rufus Sewell. Ian Holm and Christina Ricci Directed by Chuck Russell. Opens Friday. (Beechwood. Carmike) COYOTE UGLY (PG-13) Producer Jerry Bruckheimer's mindless comedy ol tackiness follows a 21-year-old. small-town New Jersey girl (Piper Perabo) as she descends into Manhattan in hopes ol a songwriting career She takes a cheap apartment in Chinatown and gets a pb at Coyote Ugly, a wild tavern in the East Village that resembles the worst elements of Cocktail and MTVs "Spring Break" specials. With Adam Garcia. Maria Bello. Tyra Banks and John Goodman. See Movie Pick. (Beechwood. Carmike) DISNEY’S THE KID (PG) This plucky family comedy gets syrupy (thanks especially to the obnoxious musical cues), but stays pretty well on trade Bruce Willis plays a sarcastic L.A. image consultant who. on the eve of his 40th birthday, gets to meet him self as an 8-year-old kid. He dismisses the phenomenon as an oncoming ner vous breakdown The pudgy kid. played with convincing charm and wit by puuty newcomer Spencer Breslin. can’t under stand why he's been transplanted to his future, either. The two develop c decent rapport, however, and Willis’ cold heart inevitably thaws With Emily Mortimer and Lily Tomlin. Directed by John Turteltaub (Beechwood. Carmike) “EDWARD ABBEY: A VOICE IN THE WILDERNESS" (NR) A documentary about the controversial and influential American author. The film Lonely The Bra've was based on Abbey's novel Brave Lonely. (Athens-Clarke Library) “FLICKER” (NR) Wednesdays pro gram features a collection of films called “Talking Arvmal Films From The Golden Years Of Hollywood’ consisting of throe films from the 1930's with real animals (donkeys, chickens, dogs, cats and horses). Friday's and Saturday's pro gram features The Blues Accordin' To Lightnin'Hopkins (1969). a short docu mentary directed by Les Blank about the great Texas bluesman Lightnin' Hopkins. Footage includes perfor mances at an outdoor barbecue and a black rodeo and a visit to his boyhood town of Centerville, Texas Monday's. Tuesday's and next Wednesday's pro gram features Alfred Hitchcock's Sabotage (1936), a suspense-thriller set in London following a group of foreign saboteurs who devise evil plans behind the walls of a seemingly harmless mevie theater. Call 545-0039 for more information. (Flicker Theatre) FREQUENCY (PG-13) James Caviezel and Dennis Quaid star in director Gregory Hoblit’s (Primal Fear) chaotic and sentimental “what if’ fantasy-drama about a ,oung. modern-day New York cop who goes 30 years back in time (by way of a ham radio) and connects and converses with his late father. Starts Friday. (Mall) GLADIATOR (R) This lengthy drama is a powerful examination of political power, jealousy, corruption and revenge with an load ol graphic battle scenes. The story follows Maximus (Russell Crowe), a brave, loyal, uncorrupted Roman general screwed over by a sniveling heir to the throne (Joaquin Phoenix) who elbows his way into 'power The film shifts from one compli cated subplot to another, but most moviegoers will enjoy the impressive action sequences, battle scenes and political themes. Directed by Ridley Scott Showing Monday and Tuesday. (Georgia Theatre) HOLLOW MAN (R) A tedious, gim micky. poorly-written suspense-thriller from director Paul Verhoeven (Basic Instinct) about a “brilliant” group of young scientists (most ot whom belong in jail or the loony bin) at a dingy, top- secret military lab who have just unlocked the secret ot “invisibility." The team's cocky leader, Sebastian Came (a sneering Kevin Bacon), ignores the risks, defies orders Irom his boss (William DeVane in his “double-shot’ weekend performance) and tests the dangerous procedure on himself. For some unexplained reason, he immedi ately becomes a psycho stalker and goes about raping, molesting and mur dering his colleagues and neighbors. Although some special eflects depicting the giuesome translormation from vis ible state to “invisibility" are genuinely impressive, the story goes nowhere. Co-stars Elisabeth Shue and Josh Brolin look embarrassed as they so their best with the annoying dialogue and ridiculous circumstances Avoid at all costs (Beechwood, Carmike, Commerce Drive-In) MAD ABOUT MAMBO (PG-13) A romantic comedy about a Catholic high school student who tries to perfect his soccer timing by practicing dance Ot course, he tails in love wth his dance partner With Keri Russell. Brian Cox and William Ash Written and directed by John Forte (Carmike) ’ ME, MYSELF & IRENE (R) Jim Carrey suffers an extremely weird split personality disorder in this disap pointing “gross-out’ comedy from the Farrelly Brothers He plays a mce-guy cop living in Rhode Island in a town where everybody constantly walks all over him One day. he totally loses it and becomes "Hank," a completely unlikable. overly aggressive, sexist menace. Enter Renee Zellweger (Jerry Maguire), who pouts her way through a rather drab performance as the schizo cop’s love interest. With Chris Cooper. Robert Forster, Richard Jenkins. Ana and Little Tony Cox. (Mall) NUTTY PROFESSOR II: THE KLUMPS (PG-13) In an impressive follow-up to his breakthrough perfor mance in the 1996 hit The Nutty Prolessor (a remake of the 1963 Jerry Lewis comedy), Eddie Murphy re proves his comic capabilities and delivers an uncharacteristically sensitive take on reai family characters. Unfortunately The Klumps bets every thing on Murphy's abilities and barely stays on track enough to set up each punch line and sight gag. The story mostly follows science professor Sherman Kiump as he nervously deals with his mounting affections aimed at his colleague. Denise (Janet Jackson). She and Sherman have fallen in love while working on a “fountain ol youth" tormula that restores potency and vigor. The main crisis of the story, however, involves Sherman's uninhibited Id—a selfish and brash character known as "Buddy Love’—that still exists inside him. Love jumps out from Sherman's subconscious at the worst possible times and, thanks to an accident in the DNA laboratory, manifests himself in a slick, tacky human figure. While Murphy is al his best in his depiction's ol the variously flawed and likable K'umps. the him merely touches these characters and. instead, keeps its locus on vulgarity rather than charm. Too bad (Beechwood, Carmike. Commerce Drive-In) THE PATRIOT (R) At times moving and complicated, the film assumes its audience has already brushed up heavily on its Colonial history and bounces from one scenario to another without thoroughly setting up any ol them. Mel Gibson as a South Carolina farmer who resists the call to arms pro pels the film, but some scenes are so poorly written it's hard not to laugh. Heath Ledger stands out as the rebel lious eldest son determined to fight for the cause. English actors Jason Isaacs and Tom Wilkinson are fantastic as fop pish British olticers. (Beechwood, Carmike) THE PERFECT STORM (PG-13) A salty tragedy, directed with a heavy hand by Wolfgang Petersen from Sebastian Junger's best-selling book. The story, set in the fishing town ot Gloucester in 1991, gradually introduces a handful of characters struggling to make life work, be it on the sea or on land As the boat's serious-minded, determined skipper, George Clooney clocks in a strong per formance as do Mary Elizabeth Mastrantomo (Umbo), Mark Wahlberg, Diane Lane, William Fichtner and the invaluable John C Reilly Ends Thursday. (Beechwood, Carmike) POKEMON: THE MOVIE 2000 (G) First off. if you are not familiar with the Pok6mon universe, then basically Pokemon are animals that trainers cap ture and battle for point: and badges in the popular kids' TV series and trading card game l liked this movie, aside from small children yelling "Pikachu" in the movie theater. The main *hing I liked was that this movie was not as cheesy as the first Pokemon movie. So it you have a couple ot bucks to blow, go and see a matinee, because it is surprisingly funny. Ends T hursday. [Alex Moore] (Beechwood, Carmike) THE REPLACEMENTS (PG-13) On the heels of Oliver Stone's overly dra matic Any Given Sunday comes this romp from director Howard Deulch (Odd Couple II, Grumpier Old Men), This "underdog" sports comedy (based loosely on the 1987 professional tool- ball players' strike) follows a mis matched crew of outsiders recruited to play for a pro team. Will Keanu Reeves deliver a believable performance as the “scab squad" quarterback? It won't mater because the great Gene Hackman will carry this either way as the team head coach. With veteran grouch Jack Ward. Orlando Jones (of the recent *7- Up’ ads). Welsh actor Rhys Hans (Notting Hilt), and Swngers alumni Brooke Langton and Jon Favreau. Opens Friday. (Beechwood, Carmike) ROAD TRIP (R) Sure, this is a big, dumb, derivative college romp filled with obligatory nudity and hit-or-miss jokes, but it’s worth a look-see if only for the inspired performance from gangly, nerdy newcomer DJ Qualls as the gleefully exploited, likable geek who learns the ropes of life while on a ridicu lous cross-country road trip Partially filmed on the UGA campus and around Athens Directed and co-written by Todd Phillips. Ends Thursday. (Mall) SCARY MOVIE (R) Directing from a weird script written by Shawn Wayans, Marlon Wayans. and others. Keenen Ivory Wayans has assembled one of the most over-the-top disgusting comedies of the year This movie skewers scenes trom recent slasher flicks and makes a satirical attack on some of the catch- phrases and cliches produced recently ty American cinema Most of the comedy is raucous, nasty and hit-or- miss. but the “gross-out humor” sur passes that ot American Pie, There's Something About Wary and the recent Me. Myself & Irene (Beechwood. Carmike. Commerce Drive-In) SHANGHAI NOON (PG-13) A silly bui entertaining martiai arts Western that makes little sense but gets big laughs Starring Jackie Chari. Lucy Liu and Owen Wilson (Mall) SPACE COWBOYS (PG-13) A harm less and amusing Hollywood flick about the modern "post-Cold War’ world of NASA directed by Clint Eastwood. The unlikely story follows four veteran astro nauts (Eastwood. Donald Sutherland, Tommy Lee Jones and James Garner) who—after over 30 years away from duly—accept a dangerous assignment to return to space one last time on a secret mission involving a Russian "satellite"-gone-haywire. The story unfolds in two parts: the lirst few acts introduce the four guys and all ol their oid rivalries, grudges and love interests; the latter hall involves a mysterious governmental scheme. Expect plenty ot running jokes involving sexually- charged zingers and one-liners, some decent special eflects and a very loose final ad With James Cromwell. Loren Dean, Courtney B Vance. William MOVIE LISTINGS Theater schedules often change after our deadline. Please call ahead. ACC LIBRARY (613-3650) Edward Abbey: A Voice In The Wilderness (NR) 7:00 (Th. 8/10) Sprout Wings And Fly (NR) 8:15 (Th. 8/10) BEECHWOOD (546-1011) Autumn In New York (PG-13) 2:00. 4:15. 7:00. 9:15 (opens F. 8/11) Bless The Child (R) 2:25. 4:50, 7:15. 9:35 (opens F. 8/11) Coyote Ugly (PG-13) 1:20, 3:20, 5:20, 7:20, 9:20 (new times F. 8/11: 1:20, 3:20, 5:20. 7:35, 9:30) Disney's The Kid (PG) 1:30, 4:00, 7:10. 9:25 (new times F. 8/11: 1:35. 4:00. 7:10) Hollow Man (R) 2:15, 4.45, 7:15, 9:55 The Nutty Processor II: The Klumps (PG-13) 12:45, 2:00, 3:00. 4:15, 5:15, 7:00. 7:30. 9:15, 9:45 (new times F. 8/11: 12:45. 3:00, 5:15. 7:30. 9:45) The Patriot (R) 8:00 The Ferfect Storm (PG-13) 7:05, 9:50 (ends Th. 8/10) Pokemon: The Movie 2000 (G) 12:55, 3:10, 5:25 (ends Th. 8/10) The Replacements (PG-13) 1:50, 4:20, 7:25, 9:50 (opens F. 8/11) Scary Movie (R) 1:25, 3:30, 5:30, 7:30. 9:30 (new time F. 8/11: 9:25) Space Cowboys (PG-13) 1:40, 4:30, 7:10, 9:40 Thomas And The Magic Railroad (G) 1:00, 3:05, 5:00 What Lies Beneath (PG-13) 1:30, 4:10, 7:05, 9:55 (new times F. 8/11: 1:30, 4:10, 7:00, 9:35) X-Men (PG-13) 1:45. 4:20. 7:20, 9:35 (new times F. 8/11: 1:45, 4:20, 7:05. 9:20) CARMIKE 1 2 (354-0016) Autumn In New York (PG-13) 2:15, 4:35, 7:10, 9:25 (opens F. 8/11) Bless The Child (R) 2:30, 4:55, 7:15, 9:35 (opens F. 8/11) Coyote Ugly (PG-13) 12:45, 3:00, 5:15, 7:30. 9:45 Disney's The Kid (PG) 12:20, 2:35, 4:50, 7:05, 9:20 (new times F. 8/11: No 9:20 showing) . Hollow Man (R) 12:30, 3:00, 7:00, 9:30 Mad About Mambo (PG-13) 12:30, 2:45. 5:00, 7:15. 9:20 (new times F. 8/11: 7:30, 9:40) The Nutty Professor II: The Klumps (PG-13) 1:15, 1:45, 4:00. 4:30, 7:00, 7:30, 9:30, 10:00 (new tines F. 8/11: 1:15, 4:00. 7:00, 9:30) The Patriot (R) 8:00 (new time F. 8/11: 9:15) The Perfect Storm (PG-13) 7:00, 10:00 (end Th. 8/10) Pokemon: The Movie 2000 (G) 12:25, 2:40. 4:55 (ends Th. 8/10) The Replacements (PG-13) 2:00, 4:30, 7:00, 9:30 (open: F. 8/11) Scary Movie (R) 12:15, 2:30, 4:45, 7:00. 9:15 Space Cowboys (PG-13) 1:15, 4:00, 7:00, 9:30 Thomas And The Magic Railroad (G) 1:30, 3:30, 5:30 What Lies Beneath (R) 1:00 4:00, 7:00, 9:45 X-Men (PG-13) 12:15, 2:30. 4:45. 7:00. 9:15 COMMERCE DRIVE-IN (335-2486) All shows begin ot dusk, Monday through Sundoy The Nutty Professor: The Klumps (PG-13) Screen 1 Hollow Man (R) Screen 2 Scary Movie (R) Screen 3 (ends Th. 8/10) A -Men (PG-13) Screen 3 (starts F. 8/11) FLICKER THEATRE (546-0039) “Talking Animal Films From The Golden Years Of Hollywood" (NR) 8:30 (W. 8/9) The Blues Accordin' To Lightnin' Hopkins (NR) 8:30 (F. 8/11 & Sa. 8/12) Sabotage (NR) 8:30 (M. 8/14, Tu. 8/15, W. 8/16) GEORGIA SQUARE MALL In (543-1632) The Adventure Of Rocky And Bullwinkle (PG) 5:40 (ends Th. 8/10) Big Momma's House (PG-13) 5:40, 7:55 (12:25, 2:55 Si. & Su.) (starts F. 8/11) Frequency (PG-13) 5:35, 8:00 (12:20, 2:45 Sa. 8. Su.) (starts F. 8/11) Me. Myself & Irene (R) 5:30, 8.10 (12:15, 2:50 Sa. & Su.) Road Trip (R) 5:35, 7:55 (ends Th. 8/10) Shanghai Noon (PG-13) 5:45, 8:05 (12:30, 3:00 Sa. 8 Su.) Where The Heart Is (PG-13) 8:00 (ends Th. 8/10) GEORGIA THEATRE (549-9918) Gladiator (R) 7:00, 10:00 (M. 8/14. Tu. 8/15) Elizabeth Shue and Kevin Bacor. star in Hollow Man. FLAGPOLE AUGUST 9, 2000