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AN AMERICAN HAUNTING (PG-
13) Reenacting the "true* events ol
Tennessee's Bell Witch, the actors
looked like they raided M Night's post-
Village yard sale lor costumes Even
the teenage girts screaming just to hear
themselves scream had cooled oil by
the puny anticlimax [Glen Dingier)
Starts Friday (Georgia Square 5)
THE BENCHWARMERS (PG-13)
Three losers—Gus (Rob Schneider).
Richie (a withering David Spade)
and Clark (Jon Heder)—take on the
mean kids in a baseball tournament I
nearly entered a state ot Zen-like peace
through Benchwarmers absolute lack
ot laughs Ends Thursday (Georgia
Square 5)
THE BREAK UP (PG-13) The Break
Up dares to ask, "What happens after
the music swells, the lovers kiss, and
the credits roll"** For Gary and Brooke
(Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston).
the credits mean the implosion ol their
domestic bliss even though both still
love one another, and neither desires to
lea\ e their condo Director Peyton Reed
(Bring It On, Do»n with Love) delivers
a Woody Allen-ish insight into falling
out of. rather than in. love that lacks
the auteurs humorous profundity and
artistry I It give The Break Up credit
for frying to change its generic spots,
but like some guys, some films donl
deserve another chance (Beechwood.
Carmike)
CARS (G) When rookie race car
Lightning McQueen (voiced with amia
ble arrogance by Owen Wilson) wrecks
on his way to the championship race
m California, the denizens of dried-up
Radiator Springs show him loneli
ness and winning aren't what life is all
about Finding friendship with sweet
but stupid tow truck Mater (Larry the
Cable Guy in the film’s most endear
ing voice work), and love with Sally
the Porsche (Bonnie Hunt). Lightning
also learns a thing or two about racing
from Doc, an old Hudson Hornet (Paul
Newman) A showy, technical marvel
(easily Pixar s finest). Cars backfires in
its epic—for a cartoon—running time
No matter. Cars is fast enough to zoom
to the head of the 2006 animation pack
(Beechwood. Carmike)
► CLICK (PG-13) When architect/
overworked family man Michael
Newman (Adam Sandler) gets a uni
versal remote that controls his entire
universe, he fast-forwards and rewinds
with impunity before, like an evil TiVo.
the remote begins to make choices
for him Directed by Sandler mainstay
Frank Coraci (The Wedding Singer, The
Waterbof) Opens Friday (Beechwood,
Carmike. Highway 17 Theatres)
THE DA VINCI CODE (PG-13) I have
yet to see a theoretically exciting film
helmed by Ron Howard actually be
exciting The Da Vinci Code suffers that
same dramatic malaise, a drawback
only enhanced by the novel's own lack
ot action Cryptologist Robert Langdon
(Tom Hanks) solves the greatest lie
ever told with his mind, not with guns,
explosions or impossible stunts
The filmts sole thrill comes when lan
McKellan’s Sir Leigh Teabmg rousmgly
unravels the mystery surrounding the
Holy Grail's history. (Carmike). Ends
Thursday (Beechwood)
FAILURE TO LAUNCH (PG-13) Trip
(McConaughey) still lives with his
parents, who hire Paula (Sarah Jessica
Parker) to cure their son of ‘Failure To
Launch’ syndrome. Failure to Launch
is sort of like Hitch, but even more
contrived. Ends Thursday (Georgia
Square 5)
THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS:
TOKYO DRIFT (PG-13) 10 seconds
That's exactly how long Vm Deisel is in
The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift
You have been warned The rest of the
movie is painfully slow given that ills
about such awesomely fast cars. You
would think that if they make a movie
about the exerting world of Tokyo drift
racing, there would nothing but roaring
engines and screeching tires, and the
film would be 95 percent super-cool,
mega-badass racing Sadly, there are
only maybe four actual races (one
of which is not drifting, and Two of
which were filmed in a parking deck
in California—not as thrilling as
you would think), a lot of spinning in
circles and even more slow, boring
’drama’ between fathers and sons,
and high school kids who decide thal
they have to have an Western shoot
out-style. all-or-nothing race to solve
their problems Not worth the price of
a movie ticket, stay home and rent the
first one. [Alex Moore) (Beechwood.
Carmike)
GARFIELO: A TALE OF TWO
KITTIES (PG) Picture if you will.
Bill Murray still stinging from his
Oscar loss last year, needs a pay-
check—badly We get to listen to him
cash that paycheck, again, while having
our collective eyes gouged out in this
boring, totally unfunny movie about fat
cat Garfield and his simpering owner
John The eye-gougmg part is Jennifer
Love Hewitt, by the w3y One supposes
the parents who rant their children to
think that this tripe is all the Hollywood
has to offer them, will rejoice Sadfy,
the rest of us will weep, and those who
hold that smartass cat so dear, will go
back and read his comic strip adven
tures and dream of what could have
been. [Margaret Moore) (Beechwood.
Carmike. Highway 17 Theatres)
ICE AGE: THE MELTDOWN (PG)
This cute, mild sequel to the 2002
animated hit will please those who
found the adventures of Manny. Sid
and Diego a pleasant diversion the
first go round Ice Age The Meltdown
is merely a sophisticated Land Before
Time, and lets face it. Dinosaurs are
way cooler. (Georgia Square 5)
AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH (PG)
Al Gore's documentary about the over
whelming scientific evidence regarding
global warming and how it is linked to
mankind, and man's environmentally
destructive activities. Don't think this is
a boring doc, it’s gotten greatreviews
from movie critics and is thoughtful,
engaging and has stunning visuals.
Roger Ebert said in his review (lor
the first time in his career as a movie
critic): "You owe it to yourself to see
this film.’ Opens Friday (Beechwood)
THE LAKE HOUSE (PG) See Flick
Skinny. Whittle along with me The
Lake House is a vaguely magical-
realist (not surprising in the hands
ol Argentinean director Alejandro
Agiesti). Jane Austerwelerencing
romance about two lonely people,
played by Reeves and Bullock, who
fall in love via letters from two years
apart in time. II the previous sentence
generated a burble ol nausea, trust that
feeling. Those still with us because
those two names incite excitement at a
Spaed reunion could hardly be further
off as hand-holding storyfelling and-
gooey dialogue render the pace, well,
hardly speedy. Round three: those
who can't ignore bus-sized plot holes
or would compare Keanu bumbling
through some pseudo-philosophical
drivel about the vicissitudes of time
and space unfavorably with a dentist
visit should similarly save themselves
the splitting headaches both could
easily, in this case, induce If none
of the aforementioned dampens your
desire, the occasional flashes ot
genuine chemistry, gorgeous settings,
and well-placed flushes of Nick Drake
should put this film right up your al
ley. (Brandon Waddell) (Beechwood.
Carmike)
MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE III (PG-13)
Good morning, Mr. Abrams. Your mis
sion, should you choose to accept it.
involves the recovery of the Mission:
Impossible franchise. The first and
second Missions made their producers
filthy rich, but left something to be de
sired. spy-wise. It is essential that ev
erything revolves around Tom Cruise
Otherwise, the Scientologists will make
your head explode like in Scanners
Ends Thursday (Carmike)
NACHO LIBRE (PG) See Move Pick
(Beechwood. Carmike)
THE OMEN (R) In the new Omen
released fittingly enough on 6/6/06.
a string of mysterious deaths still
lead Robert Thorn (Liev Schreiber) to
discover his child is a literal hellion.
Despite the warnings (inadequate cast
ing, a diluted Damien, and ludicrously
over-portentous everything), director
John Moore {Flight of the Phoenix) and
original screenwriter David Seltzer de
feat the forces of good to create a suit
ably chilling Satanic substitute. Despite
its sins, this obvious but effective
horror film, a class act like its papa,
is less a bad Omen than an altogether
familiar one. (Carmike), Ends Thursday
(Beechwood)
OVER THE HEOGE (PG) I was
surprised by Hedgds genuine inter
est in being funny Waking from their
hibernation, a family of foragers,
headed by turtle Verne (voiced by Garry
Shandling) begin packing for next
winter until their routine is upset by a
raccoon. RJ (v Bruce Willis), in some
serious hock to a nasty brown bear (v.
Nick Nolle) Steering clear of the Shrek
plan for pop culture domination. Hedge
actually establishes characters about
whose fates you actually care (I'm still
in shock) Over the Hedge trades on
its understated slyness (when the film
references, il winks rather than drops
an Acme anvil on your head), rare in
today's animated flicks (Highway 17
Theatres); Ends fhursday (Beechwood.
Carmike)
APPMRIE HOME COMPANION
(PG-13) With this filmed version
of Garrison KeillorS popular radio
program, legendary filmmaker Robert
Altman has constructed his warmest
picture in years His camera captures
the eccentricities ol a unique perfor
mance company that labors in a most
outdated medium. Altman's extreme
faith in his cast pays off, as everyone
naturally bounces off one another In a
masters hands, endearing can be art.
(Beechwood)
RETURN OF THE FIVE DEADLY
VENOMS (NR) 1978. Four men.
crippled by an evil kung fu master,
band together to learn kung fu from an
old master teacher and seek their re
venge. Shows Thursday. 6/22 (Diverse
Universe)
ROADS TO KOKTABEL (NR) 2003
An award-winning Russian road
movie written and directed by Boris
Khlebnikov and Aleksei Popogrebsky,
Roads to Kcktabelchronicles the
1000-kilometer journey of a father
(Igor Csernyevics) and son (Gleb
MOVIE LISTINGS
Theater schedules often change after our deadline. Please call ahead.
ACC UBRARY (706-613-3650)
Roads to Koktebel (NR) 7:00 (Th. 6/22)
BEECHWOOD (706-546-1011)
The Break Up (PC-13) 1:45. 4:30, 7:25. 9:50
Can (G) 12:00. 1:30. 2:45. 4:15. 5:30. 7:00, 8:15, 9:45
Click (PG-13) 12:10, 2:35. 5:00. 7:30. 9:55 (opens f.
6/23)
The Da Vind Code (PG-13) 9:30 (ends Th. 6/22)
The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift (PG-13) 1:40.
4:40. 7:10. 9:35
Garfield: A Tale of Two Kittles (PG) 1:00. 3:10, 5:15.
7:20. 9:20
An Inconvenient Truth (PG) 1:15. 4:C0, 7:05. 9:55
(opens F. 6/23)
The Lake House (PG) 12:35. 2:55. 5:15. 7:35. 10:00
(new times F. 6/23: 1:50, 4:25. 7:05. 9:25)
Nacho Libre (PG) 12:25. 2:45. 5:05. 7:30. 9:50 (new
times F. 6/23: 2:00. 4:45, 7:15, 9:40)
The Omen (R) 2:00. 4:40, 7:20, 9:55 (ends Th. 6/22)
Over the Hedge (PG) 12:15. 2:30. 5:00. 7:30 (ends Th.
6/22)
A Prairie Home Companion (PG-13) 2:10. 4:35, 7:15,
10:00
X Men; The Last Stand (PG-13) 1:30, 4:15, 7:10. 9:45
CARMIKE 12 (706-354-0016)
The Break Up (PG-13) 12:00. 2:30. 5:00. 7:30, 10:00
(new times F. 6/22:1:10. 4:10, 7:10. 9:30)
Can (G) 12:00, 12:30. 2:20. 2:50. 4:40, 5:10. 7:00.
7:30. 9:30. 9:50 (new times F. 6/23: 12:25. 2:50. 5:15.
7:40. 10:00)
Click (PG-13) 1:30, 1:55. 4:15. 4:45, 7:00. 7:30. 9:30,
9:55 (opens F. 6/23)
The Da Vinci Code (PG-13) 1:00, 4:15. 7:30
The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift (PG-13) 12:30
2:55. 5:20. 7:45, 10:10
Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties (PG) 12:35. 2:40. 4:45.
7:00. 9:20 (no 9:20 show Tu. 6/27)
The Lake House (PG) 12:40. 3:00. 5:15, 7:30. 9:50
Mission: Impossible III (PG-13) 1:00. 4:00. 7:00. 9:40
(ends Th. 6/22)
Nacho Libre (PG) 12:50. 3:10. 5:20. 7:40, 10:00
The Omen (R) 1:00. 4:00. 7:00, 9:40
Over the Hedge (PG) 12:30. 2:30. 4:30, 7:00, 9:00
(ends Th. 6/22)
Superman Returns (PG-13) 10:00 (sneak preview Tu.
6/27)
Waist Deep (R) 1:10, 3:20, 5:30. 7:45, 10:00 (opens
F. 6/23)
X-Mem The Last Stand (PG-13) 12:00, 2:30. 5:00. 7:30.
10:00 (new times F. 6/23: 1:15, 4:15. 7:15. 9:40)
DIVERSE UNIVERSE MANUAL ARTS (706-613-8332)
Return of the Five Deadly Venoms (NR) 7:30 (Th. 6/22)
6E0MU SQUARE 5 (706-S48-3426)
An American Haunting (PG-13) 1:00, 3:10. 5:20. 7:30,
9:40 (starts F. 6/23)
The Benchwarmers (PG-13) 1:05. 3:10, 5:15, 7:20, 9:25
(ends Th. 6/22)
Failure to Launch (PG-13) 1:00, 3:15, 5:30. 7:45. 10:00
(ends Th. 6/22)
Ice Age: The Meltdown (PG) 12:45, 2:15, 3:00, 4:30,
5:15, 6:45, 7:30. 9:00. 9:45
Scary Movie 4 (PG-13) 1:05. 3:15. 5:25. 7:35. 9:45
(starts F. 6/23)
Silent Hill (R) 1:00, 4:00. 7:00. 9:40 (ends Th. 6/22)
United 93 (R) 1:05, 4:05. 7:05. 9:35 (starts F. 6/23)
HWY 17 DRIVE-IN THEATERS (706-213-7693)
dick (PG-13) 8:30 (opens F. 6/23)
Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties (PG) 8:30
Over the Hedge (PG) 8:30
X-Men: The last Stand (PG-13) 8:30 (ends Th. 6/22)
VGA LEGION FIELD (706-542-6396)
V for Vendetta (PG-13) 9:00 (Th. 6/22)
UNITY ATHENS (706-613-8050)
The Secret (NR) 7:00 (F. 6/23)
tt sure beats my old desk organizer.
Puskepalis). whose destination—a
famify member's home by the Black
Sea—represents something different to
each Koktabel won the Silver Georgy at
the Moscow International Film Festival,
as well as four additional awards from
a globetrotting contingent of film fes
tivals Part ol the ACC Library's iFilms
series. Shows Thursday. 6/22 (ACC
Library)
SCARY MOVIE 4 (PG-13) Those who
need more Anna Faris as naive Cindy
Campbell or Regina Hall's hoochie
mama Brenda, wandering into flicks
like Saw. War ot the Worlds and The
Village, will laugh. Human ify. however,
wiH cry Starts Friday (Georgia Square
5)
THE SECRET (NR) In theory this
inspirational film is similar in aim to
What the Bleep Do We Know? and
promises, according to its official web
site. to reveal "The Secret’ lo "unlim
ited joy, health, money, relationships
love, youth everything you have ever
wanted" Suggested donation is $5
Shows Friday. 6/23 (Unity Athens)
SILENT HILL (R) Best adaptation
of a videogame to date with lots ol
atmosphere and a real sense ol creepy
loneliness A desperate mother (Rahda
Mitchell) loses her sick daughter in a
deserted mining town Ends Thursday
(Georgia Square 5)
SUPERMAN RETURNS (PG-13)
A superheroic return 19 years in the
making (or 26 if you ignore Superman
III and TV like Bryan Singer and I do)
is also the summer's biggest movie
Coming back to Earth alter a long
soiourn. Superman (Brandon Routh)
finds he's no longer as necessary as
he once was The planet has moved on
and so has Lois Lane (Kate Bosworth).
now a single mother Thankfully, the
machinations of recently emancipated
supervillam Lex Luthor (Kevin Spacey)
provide the Man ot Steel with a chance
to reclaim his spot as the worlds great
est superhero With Frank Langel la as
Perry White. Sam Huntington as Jimmy
Olsen, Eva Marie Saint as Martha Kent,
and archive footage ol Marlon Brando
as Jor-EI. Superman's lather Opens
Wednesday. 6/28 (special Tuesday.
6/27 showing at Carmike)
UNITED 93 (R) Paul Greengrass'
thoughtful film deserves all the dev
astating^ positive accusations critics
have hurled at it. Is United 93 painful
to watch? Yes Would I recommend it?
Without a doubt. Starts Friday (Georgia
Square 5)
V FOR VENDETTA (R) Tackling the
toughest demigod in the pencil-and-ink
pantheon. Alan Moore, the screenwrit
ing Wachowskis dig into this danger
ously political, prescient cautionary
tale about a masked vigilante (Hugo
Weaving). That a genre flick is the only
picture brave enough to inquire so
deeply into insurgency should surprise
no one. though the many who devour
big-budget action flicks might find Vs
vigor to leave a bitter aftertaste. Shows
Thursday. 6/22 (UGA Legion Field)
WAIST DEEP (R)Tyrese Gibson,
plays 02. an ex-con whose son is kid
napped in a carjacking. To free his son
from Meal (ghetto superstar. The Game,
in his film debut). 02 and street-smart
Coco (Meagan Goode. Roll Bounce)
must break the law Also starting
Larenz Tate. Opens Friday (Carmike)
X-MEN: THE LAST STAND (PG-
13) The third film has a kitschy, more
comic book-y appeal as the tafe ol the
entire world depends upon the X-Men
stopping Magneto (tan McKellan) from
unleashing the strongest mutant ever
known, the Phoenix (Famke Janssen).
Major characters are slaughtered with
careless abandon in director Brett
Ratner's film, yef the bigger stakes
strangely mean less emotional heft
(Beechwood. Carmike); Ends Thursday
(Highway 17 Theatres)
Drew Wheeler
14 FLAGPOLE.COM JUNE 21,2006
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