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TRAFFIC STOP
I was driving down Atlanta Highway the
other day when Officer Kenneth Beavers of the
Athens-Clarke County Police Department pulled
up behind me at a stop light. When the light
changed and I proceeded forward, he turned on
his lights and siren. I immediately pulled into
the Walgreen's parking lot and was informed
that my license plate frame (which has been
on my car for six years) covers the numbers
on my tag decal and therefore creates a safety
hazard in violation of State Code 40-2-41. The
license plate frame says “Girl Scouts, Unlimited
Possibilities" and was presented to me as a Girl
Scout Leader appreciation gift in 2000. Because
my three children were in the car with me, I
bit my tongue and responded to Officer Beavers
very respectfully, explaining that I had no idea
that license plate frames were illegal. I offered
to take the dangerous accessory off my car im
mediately, but was told that it could wait until I
got home. Officer Beavers explained that license
plate frames are made fcr the front bumper only,
even though the state of Georgia does not is
sue license plates for the front of cars. He did
not issue me a warning, but instead gave me a
ticket: On my way home, I counted four cars with
license plate frames on their back bumpers.
I was shocked that I had been issued a cita
tion for such a ridiculous offense. My 13-year-old
daughter pointed out that my bumperstickers
might have had something to do with it I have
two anti-war and anti-Bush bumper stickers on
my car and I can't help but wonder if Officer
Beavers selectively enforces laws when he dis
agrees with the political views of our city's citi
zens. I will appear in Municipal Court on Aug. 6
to argue my case. It is not the S15 fine I mind,
it is the harassment and intimidation that both
ers me.
Laura Davis
Athens
Editor’s Note: flagpole checked in with Officer Beavers,
who says Ms. Davis’ ticket had nothing to do with politics
or her bumperstickers. As an officer assigned full-time
to the traffic unit, he writes a lot of t>ckets for all kinds
of violations, he says. Beavers also says that some rear
license plate frames that do not conceal tag information
are legal in Georgia.
BEAN CURD PROPS
I think it's hilarious how fired up some people
in this town have gotten over Missy Kulik's Tofu
Baby comics. It's actually really cool that a
four-panel strip in a free weekly entertainment
rag has elicited such an emotional response in
its readers. Somebody is even making their own
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"alternate" Tofu Baby comics, (found in various
places downtown) depicting her doing things
the Flagpole would never be able to print Wow!
To think that a single small piece of bean curd
could be responsible for so much.
S. Maynard
Athens
B0NNAR00
In response to Austen Mikulka's commentary
regarding his experience at this year's Bonnaroo
Music Festival ["Not Fade Away," July 5], I pose
the following question to the author: Did you
make sure to pick up a nice, tall double latte
with cream from Starbucks while you were there?
Perhaps unroll your Berber fleece blanket and sit
listening to My Morning Jacket while sipping?
Austen, I make no bones about one's personal
taste in music—it is an individual, Jah-given
right to ingest whatever moves you. I simply
didn't know that mainstream, homogenized-for-
the-masses, corporate-sponsored entertainment
was your bag (baby).
It certainly isn't the bag of the so-called
"hippies" of which you speak in your piece.
That's why they stayed at home this year
and 100,000 clean-minded, golf shirt-wear
ing Americans who wish not to be challenged
showed up instead to hear Tom Petty (granted
a true rocker, but not
a Bonnaroo act in my
humble opinion) and
the other major players
chosen by marketing
types for a calculated
ROI.
Bonnaroo can bite
it for going the way
of the mainstream.
Not because my beloved Phil, Keller and Trey
(I've met them.all in the past at these "hippie"
events, therefore I feel comfortable using their
first names) weren't there to satisfy my dirty hip
pie cravings, but because the event promoters
went for the buck and the guaranteed draw.
Sure, Radichead is a seminal act that needs
to be seen by more people. Do they really?
They're friclon' HUGE the entire planet over. Go
to Reading (U.K.) if you want to see Radiohead
play in front of 100,000.
I could go on with comparisons, but then it's
a my taste vs. your taste thing. Not gonna do it.
What I will ask is why you felt it necessary to
equate your successful and enjoyable experience
to the lack of a certain segment of the music-lis
tening populous? It just doesn't add up.
And to you. Flagpole: Please, please, PLEASE
take a look at the message you are facilitating
in repeatedly calling out the hippie/jamband/
non-»ndie rock crowd and characterizing them in
a negative light through your contributing writ
ers' commentary. It seems your staff (permanent
and freelance) will take any opportunity to dis
respect this viable slice of the musical pie—from
feature articles to Mr. Lamb's tongue-in-cheek
(read: chronically humorless and self-aggrandiz
ing) rips on the scene and its bands in Threats &
Promises.
Do you guys remember trashing Widespread's
first two albums in print? I'll produce the articles
if you like. A little credence and decorum, if you
will. We're all (insert higher consciousness/ reli
gious icon's name here) children and deserve to
be treated as such.
Dan Roth
Athens
ANN COULTER? FUNNY?
After reading Kris Langley's letter ("Coulter
Dangerous?" July 5], I have to ask how the hell
can you compare Ann Coulter to Bill Hicks? I un
derstand the "two sides of the same coin" point
she is trying to make, but they are not even the
same currency.
First of all. Bill Hicks was a COMEDIAN. He
was billed as such and did stand-up where his
audience knew he was trying to make them
laugh, no matter how far out he might take
them. And Hicks knew when the crowd got rest
less and did not want
to hear any more poli
tics, he could always
tell a dick joke and
then riff on porn and
drugs for a while. Ann
Coulter is as funny as
the pancreatic cancer
which killed Bill. Her
act consists of repeat
ing the same trite right-wing bullshit over and
over again, becoming hysterical when necessary
to end any debate once she realizes she is in
over her head. She may be .ryir.g to elicit an
evil grin, but she is not kidding and her audi
ence knows it Coulter might be called a pundit,
but even polite feminists simply refer to her as
a cunt. If it were not for the efforts of many of
the people she puts down, she would not even
have her job. Instead of appearing on talk shows
and bookshelves, she would be fetching Rush
Limbaugh's coffee and aetting his prescriptions
filled.
Secondly, Hicks was an oriqinal who refused
to sell out, even to his owr detriment. Because
he would not soften his stance or tone down
his act to appeal to the masses, he never en
joyed great commercial stress. He died with an
ever-growing cult following, but still in relative
obscurity. Coulter has yet another bestseller
because she is just recycling exactly whai her
humorless audience wants to hear. She poses
on the cover like some kind of vampire Eva
Braun neocon wet dream. And it sells millions of
books. And just like nearly every other number
one book, film, television show, or song in this
country, it is a complete piece of shit. She is
in it simply for the money and no publicity is
bad publicity. There is no risk in beating up on
pacifists.
So yes, we must allow all free speech no mat
ter how inane and yes, she is really too stupid to
be dangerous, but please do not compare her to
Bill Hicks. The only legitimate comparison I ever
hope to be able to make between them would be
that she, too, died a painful death at a relatively
young age. Just kidding. No, I'm not.
Dave Register
Athens
LIBERAL BED-WETTERS
I'm just now reading your column regarding
the Donkeys, gay marriage and Ralph Reed [Pub
Notes, July 5). By now, you must be even more
frustrated than usual given that the Georgia
Supreme Court actually overturned the ruling of
the liberal Superior Court judge who had ruled
the Georgia gay marriage amendment unconstitu
tional. The premise of your piece was that you'd
vote Republican if the two Donkeys running for
Gov. didn't object to a special session rewrit
ing the amendment. You must be particularly
annoyed that a Supreme Court led by liberal
bed-wette r struck down the judge's ruling—a
black female bed-wetter at that. As you opine in
your editorial, it's tough being a Donkey these
days. Let me sugge r c that you go ahead and
vote for Cagle in the Republican primary because
Ralph's going to win anyway, and this will get
your blood pressure up even higher. I'm not a
big Ralph fan either, Pete, but anybody who can
upset the bed-wetters so thoroughly i: alright
by me and must be doing something right. I was
looking forward to having the opportunity to
vote against gay marriage again, though, so I'm
. somewhat disappointed by the Sears court's rul
ing. Not that I'm anti-gay mind you, I'm just anti
any state-sanctioned gay marriage. And Pete, do
I have to remind you that the anti-gay marriage
amendment was approved by a majority of voters
in ATHENS, GA of all places? Do really think the
majority of voters in Athens are gay-bashers just
because they aren't in favor of gay marriage? One
thing you and I can agree on you touched on in
your editorial, though, and that is that Donkeys
are gutless and afraid. And I would add that you
all are mostly just PATHETIC, WHINEY LOSERS.
Kris Langley of Athens rightly points out in your
Letters section that Donkeys are also hypocrites
("Coulter Dangerous?" July 5]. You all believe
in free speech for liberal bed-wetters like Bill
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