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NOT A PROGRESSIVE?
Last week's column attempting to define "progressives" left
some people hurt and confused. Reading through the list of pro
gressive attributes and not finding themselves there left them
wondering, "Who am I?" We used to know who we were in lo
cal elections—Republicans, Greens, Democrats, Libertarians,
Independents—but no more. And now we certainly don't know who
our candidates are: especially those who don't tell us where they
stand on the issues that affect our community.
Obviously, some kind of guide for non-progressives is needed,
so that they can understand where they fit into our political spec
trum. So, here goes.
YOU MAY NOT BE A PROGRESSIVE IF...
• You liked Athens better in the old days when we had strong lead
ers who could get things done, and all you had to do was explain
your deal to them and it happened.
® You know we have poor people, but they work for you, and you
take care of them.
• You liked it better when people at the University of Georgia kept
their mouths shut and didn't mess with Athens' business.
• You understand that the business of Athens is business.
• You believe that whatever is good for developers is good for
Athens.
• You think bicycles are for children and don't belong or. city
streets.
• The Athens Area Chamber of Commerce reflects your political
philosophy and p.eferences.
• You want Athens to be more suburban, with classy, outlying
shopping centers replacing the decrepit old downtown.
• You want wider, faster streets, so that everybody can get where
they're going in a hurry.
• You believe bigger is always better.
• You believe green space belongs in parks.
• You believe that our natural resources - land, water, air - belong
to whoever owns them and that ownership should not be pre
vented from trying to make a profit, no matter how much pollu
tion might result.
• You believe old houses on big lots with shade trees are a waste
of our limited land resources.
• You believe sidewalks bring undesirable people into your area.
• You think trees are a nuisance and only get in the way of build
ers.
• You believe the only people who walk are those who can't afford
to ride.
• You believe a city bus system is an unnecessary and expensive
frill for those who don't have enough get-up-and-go to own an
automobile.
• You are offended by the sight of people eating and drinking out
side in the middle of town.
• You believe women belong at home—after work.
• You do not care to associate with anyone whose religious, social,
ethnic or sexual orientation differs from your own.
• You believe neighborhoods are okay for those who want to live
in them, but they shouldn't be allowed to become barriers to
commercial development and new roads.
• You believe our big institutions with the biggest payrolls—the
University, hospitals, industry—should not have to answer to
our local government.
• You believe our public schools are a mess, and responsible citi
zens will place their children elsewhere and shouldn't be taxed
to support a failed system.
• You believe the highest and best use of our downtown area is
condos.
• You believe business, including the public's business, is best
conducted behind closed doors.
• You believe local government has no right to tell you what to do.
SO WHAT?
If you are not a progressive, congratulations! You're in the
majority in the state of Georgia, though not here in Athens-Clarke
County. So, Mr. & Ms. Non-Progressive, you'll need to find your
selves some candidates who are open to your way of thinking. But
you've got to be careful how you gc about it. The progressives
are pretty strongly entrenched here in Athens, so you're going to
have to give a lot of money to overcome them. It can be done, but
you've got to be careful to back candidates who don't come right
out and say what they're for, because what you're for is not popu
lar with the majority here. Back some candidates who sound good
and make a good appearance but don't say anything. Platitudes:
that's the ticket! Leadership, vision, progress, unity. Stay away
from the real issues. You can deal with those after he's elected.
Pete McCommons Editor & Publisher edilor@flagpole com
THIS WEEK’S ISSUE:
NEWS <§s FEATURES
The White Animals 8
Or, Things My Dog Has Eaten
What it's like to live with a house full of animals, one of whom will eat anything... and does.
Muslims In Athens (Part One) 10
Their Faith Encompasses Many Differences
The author talks with local Muslims abcut their taith a id about their lives here.
ARTS & EVENTS
TeiIgs To ^Vstomsh 16
Patrick Dean Retires From The Weekly Flagpole Grind,
But The Local Cartoonist's Inkwell Is Far From Dry
From werewolves to yeti to spacemen to cowboys to Athens celebrities,
the contents of nine years of Dean comics is wide-ranging and full of humor.
MUSIC
Winds Of Change 31
The Strange Evolution Of California Jam Band Particle
Shifting iineups, conceptual changes and the addition of veeals are
all part of Particle weathering the storm of growth.
Every Waking Moment 32
Citizen Cope’s Clarence Greenwood Is Back For Another Round
On the band s third album, blues, hip hop. rock, reggae and folk all show up in the mix.
That Beat in Time 36
Local Bands Unforgotten
A new biweekly feature looking at dearly departed local acts. This week. Time Toy.
LETTERS
4
PARTICLE
31
CITY PAGES
6
CITIZEN COPE
32
ANIMALS
8
PAT GREEN
33
MUSLIMS
10
RECORD REVIEWS
34
OUT THERE!
12
THAT BEAT IN TIME
36
PATRICK DEAN
16
THREATS & PROMISES
37
MOVIE DOPE
18
COMICS
38
BOOK REVIEW
21
REALITY CHECK
39
ABC
22
CLASSIFIEDS
40
EDITOR 1 PUBLISHER Pete McCommons
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MANAGING EOITOR Margaret Moore
ADVERTISING SALES Anita Aubrey. Melinda Edwards, Jessica Pritchard
MUSIC EDITOR Chris Hassiotis
CITY EOITOR Ben Emanuel
CLASSIFIEDS. DISTRIBUTION t OFFICE MANAGER Emily Waldron
AD DESIGNERS Ian Rickert. Kelly Ruberto. Kristen Bach
CARTOONISTS Cameron Bogue. Jake Hebert. Jacob Hunt. Missy Kulik, Jeremy long. Jeff Manley. Clint McElroy,
KJon Waldrtp
ADOPT ME Special Agent Cindy Jerrell
ABC Chns Hassiotis, Ben Emanuel
WRITERS Michael Andrews, Hillary Brown. Tom Crawford, Emerson Dameron, David Eduardo. Ben Gerrard.
John Huie, Gordon Lamb. Gardner Linn, Chad Radford. Beth Sale. Alan Sculley Jeff Tobias. Brandon Waddell.
Drew Wheeler, Ian Wheeler
CIRCULATION Charles Greenleal, JoJo Glidewell, Roy Coughlin, Clayton Aucotn, Zack Haas, Lee Sarrell
WEB OESIGNER Ian Rickert
ADVERTISING INTERNS Bnan McBrearty. Ashley Allen
EDITORIAL INTERN Catherine Reagan
COVER DESIGN by Kelly Puberto
featuring a self-portrait of Patrick Dean
working in his studio
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VOLUME 20
ISSUE NUMBER 38
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