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• Some releases may not be showing locally this week.
ALL ALONG (NR) The plot of this
independent feature from director
Robert Masciantonio revolves around
an average American working stiff’s
midlife crisis and the vivid fantasy life
he creates in order to escape from his
mundane reality.
BEDTIME STORIES (PG)Adam
Sandler stars as a guy living through
the bedtime stories he’s telling his
niece and nephew. Director Adam
Shankman scored big. critically and
commercially with Hairspray, Bedtime
Stories looks more like his awful
crowd-pleasers Bringing Down the
House, The Pacifier and Cheaper by
the Dozen 2. The presence of Sandler's
personal scribe. Tim Herlihy (Bedtime
stories marks the eighth movie he’s
written for the likable star), doesn’t
breed confidence. With Keri Russell,
Guy Pearce. Courtney Cox, Russell
Brand, Lucy Lawless, Jonathan Pryce,
Aisha Tyler and.Richard Griffiths.
BOLT (PG) The sharply animated,
directed and written flick is the closest
Disney has gotten to achieving Pixar-
like quality, possibly due to the pres
ence of Pixar founder John Lasseter as
executive producer and Cars writer Dan
Fogelman.
BORDER CAF£ (NR) 2005. Iranian
writer-director Kambuzia Partovia
depicts the life of Reyhan (Fereshteh
Sadre Orafaiy). an independent Iranian
woman flouting tradition by reopen
ing her late husband’s truck stop caf6.
Through her cooking, Reyhan soon
attracts the attention of a Greek trucker.
Winner of the FIPRESCI Prize at the
Dhaka International Film Festival, two
Crystal Simorghs (Best Actress and
Best Screenplay) from the Fajr Film
Festival and two awards from the Mar
del Plata Film Festival. Part of the ACC
Library’s iFilms series.
BRIDE WARS (PG) Lifelong best
friends Liv and Emma (Hudson and
Hathaway) have dreamed of June wed
dings at the Plaza since they were little
girls. When their boyfriends propose,
the duo begins preparations to make
those dreams a reality. But when New
York’s hottest wedding planner. Marion
St. Claire (Candace Bergen), screws up
and books the ceremonies on the same
day. Liv and Emma's friendship turns to
bitter rivalry. Potential brides of every
shape and size will gladly go to battle
over these Wars
CONFESSIONS OF A SHOPAHOUC
(PG) Winter movie blues got you
down? More PG-rated chick lit to the
rescue! Out-of-contro! fashionista
Rebecca Bloomwood (Isla Fisher)
gets a job as an advice columnist for
a financial magazine, where she meets
potential love interest in Luke Brandon
(Hugh Dancy). Muriel's Wedding direc
tor P.J. Hogan helms this adaptation of
the Sophie Kinsella bestseller. With a
whole slew of familiar faces, including
Joan Cusack, John Goodman, Kristen
Scott Thomas and Lynn Redgrave.
CORALINE (PG) Coraline may just
be next yearns Best Animated Feature
Oscar. The filmed adaptation of the
young adult novel by Neil Gaiman
* (Sandman, Stardust) virtually adds a
third sense to the moviegoing experi
ence. A visual, sonic marvel. Coraline,
brought to life from real stuff (puppets
and miniature trees and toy trains), has
a tactile dimension. Every object, every
surface has a texture of which CG can
only dream. Wonderful new 3D tech
nology reinforces the actual existence
of the denizens of Coraline's fantastical
adventure. The 3D ably amps up the
filmis more startling moments, but its
nothing a tough youngster can't handle.
ECHELON CONSPIRACY (PG-13)
With its crap one-liners (delivered
mainly by a more bored than in One
Missed Call Edward Burns), prepon
derance of zooms, and phoned in
performances. Echelon Conspiracy is
a movie that doesn't know its place,
bypassing the direct-to-DVD route
for an undeserved, assuredly merciful
short theatrical run. For about 30 min
utes, I was more intrigued by Echelon
than Eagle Eye, the big budgeted hit it’s
ripping off.
FIRED UP (PG-13) Who exactly is
the intended audience of Fired Up:
the spirited fans of Bring It On, or the
horny dudes who prefer their laughs
dumb and their nubiles nude? I’m not
sure either will be overjoyed with this
tame, spottily funny mix of both. I’m
not quite fired up about Fired Up, but I
got an acceptable amount of laughs out
of its hour and a half.
FRIDAY THE 13th (R) Friday the
13th, version 2009, kicks ofl with a
quick expository sprint through the
origins of monstrous Jason Voorhees
(Derek Mears). Years later, a new batch
of disposable teens arrives at Camp
Crystal Lake looking for pot and find
ing Jason's wrath. Friday the 13th is
no holiday to be celebrated by all, but
for the horror flock, it’s like Christmas
in February.
GIRLS ROCK! (PG) At the Rock
‘n’ Roll Camp for Girls, four attend
ees ranging in age from eight to
18—adopted Laura (15, vocals),
recovering meth addict Misty (17,
bass), sweet metalhead Palace (7,
vocals) and dog-loving Amelia (8.
guitar)—learn to form a band, write
songs, plays gigs, and generally
behave in ways discouraged by years
of gender stereotyping. Girls Rock!
is the feature debut of directors Arne
Johnson and Shane King. Showing as
part of a double-bill with The Golden
Eaglet, a vintage Girl Scout recruitment
film from 1918, in honor of Girl Scout
Week.
GRAN TORINO (R) A retired Ford
employee and Korean War vet, Walt
Kowalski (Clint Eastwood) still lives in
the same Michigan neighborhood in
which he and his now deceased wife,
Dorothy, raised two ungrateful sons.
But the old neighborhood has changed.
Immigrants have invaded Waifs shores.
The film paints a poignant portrait of
entrenched racial hatred overcome by
human kindness and interaction. Walt’s
transformation proves you can teach
an old dog new tricks. Gran Torino
proves Eastwood is already a master
of them all.
HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU
(PG-13) Based on the self-help/ chick-
lit bestseller by Greg Behrendt (a “Sex
and the City’ story editor) and Liz
Tucillo, He's Just Not That Into You is
too long, cinematographically desolate,
and fashioned solely out of gender-
defined traits and hang-ups. A bunch
of Baltimoreans, representing every
white, hetero demographic, navigate
the stormy waters of love.
INKHEART (PG) Inkheart can claim
kinship to 1980s kid-venture, The .
Neverending Story. Mortimer “Mo’
Folchart (Brendan Fraser; likable as
usual but miscast), a Silvertongue
(whatever he reads comes to life),
spends his days searching for a rare
copy of Inkheart, the novel into which
his wife was sucked in exchange for the
selfish hero Dusttinger (Paul Bettany)
and the evil Capricorn (Andy Serkis.
The Lord of the Ringd Gollum) and
his henchmen. Bettany and Serkis ably
provide the heroic yin/dastardly yang
missing from other kid-lit adaptations.
Yet a sad irony lies in Inkhearts vigilant
defense of reading, the very necessity
of which the movie erases. Hopefully,
viewers will be inspired to read the
sequel, Inkspdl, before they see it.
JONAS BROTHERS: THE 3D
CONCERT EXPERIENCE (G) The
Jonas Brothers’ new 3D Experience is
everything a tweenage fanatic would
want and expect. Hatched in the same
laboratory that grew Britney Spears, an
early prototype whose programming
kinks tfere fixed in the Miley Cyrus
model, Kevin. Joe and Nick achieve
their primary objective to foster safe,
non-sexual crushes through catchy
pop rock tunes that blur the lines of
contemporary Christian, Disney Radio
and Top 40. The 3D Concert Experience
begins with allusions to A Hard Days
Night, one of the Bros.’ favorite films.
The non-narrative film’s central ‘plot’
involves the boys’ preparations for
the Madison Square Garden concert,
footage from which dominates the film.
The three brothers seem like nice, hard
working kids who produce a rocking,
high energy concert. The guys really
work up a sweat performing hits like
’Burnin’ Up’ and...uh...other songs.
If you’re not already a Jo Bro fan. the
movie, 3D or not, won't hold your
interest for very long. The songs are
catchy but instantly forgettable (save
the aforementioned 'Burnin' Up;’ I
like that one). The behind-the-scenes
footage is very staged and unrevealing.
Likable and charming as they are, I can
imagine being more entertained by a
real Hard-Day’s-Night-style musical
comedy starring the brothers than I was
by the Jonases' 3D Concert Experience.
THE LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT
(R) Wes Craven wasn’t a very good
filmmaker when he directed the original
in 1972. Now as producer, he's giving
Dennis lliadis (2004's Hardcore) a shot
to improve on his harrowing, awful
first film. A gang (led by “Deadwood’S
icky Garret Dillahunt) unknowingly
seeks refuge in with the parents (Tony
Goldwyn and Monica Potter) of a girl
they earlier brutally assaulted. The
original was ostensibly a remake of
Ingmar Bergman's The Virgin Spring.
With Sara Paxton.
LIFE AND DEBT (NR) 2001. Jamaica
Kincaid's non-fiction look at the
devastating effects of globalization on
her namesake island nation becomes
a ’woven tapestry of... the stories of
individual Jamaicans whose strategies
for survival... are determined by the
U.S. and other foreign economic agen
das’ in Stephanie Black’s documentary.
The film’s narration was written by
Kincaid. Winner of the Audience Award
from the Prague One World Film
Festival. Sponsored by the Institute
for Women's Studies as part of the
Women's History Month Film Festival.
MADEA GOES TO JAIL (PG-13) The
rewards of a Tyler Perry movie decrease
with every formulaic play-to-film since
his cinematic highwater mark, Why Did
I Get Married? Diary of a Mad Black
Women pretty much laid out his never-
changing Madea manifesto. Hook
them with the hilariously broad hijinks
of the mad matriarch (Tyler Perry in
drag) before force-feeding faith-based
plots best left to Bilty Graham's movie
ministry. In Madea Goes to Jail, Madea
doesn’t actually go to jail until the film’s
final 30 minutes. I’m beginning to fear
MOVIE LISTINGS
Theater schedules often change after our deadline. Please call ahead.
ACC LIBRARY (706-613-3650)
Border Cart (NR) 7:00 (Th. 3/12)
BEECHWOOD (706-546-1011)
Due to production deadlines, Beechwood movie times are
only accurate through March 12. Visit www.Flagpole.com for
updated times.
Confessions of a Shopaholic (PG) 1:30, 4:05, 7:05,
9:40
Coraline 3-D (PG) 12:10, 2:30, 4:50, 7:15, 9:35
Echelon Conspiracy (PG-13) 4:30, 9:35
Fired Up (PG-13) 1:40, 7:25
Gran Torino (R) 1:15, 7:15
He's Just Not That Into You (PG-13) 1:00, 4:00,
7:00, 9:50
Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience (G)
12:15, 2:15, 4:15, 6:15, 8:15, 10:15
Madea Goes to Jail (PG-13) 12:00, 2:25, 4:55. 7:25,
9:55
Metropolitan Opera: Madama Butterfly (NR) 7:00
(W. 3/18)
Slumdog Millionaire (R) 1:20, 4:20, 7:05, 9:45
Taken (PG-13) 12:40, 2:50, 5:00, 7:10, 9:25
Watchmen (R) 12:30, 1:30, 4:00, 5:00, 7:30, 8:30
The Wrestler (R) 4:15, 9:50
CARMIKE 12 (706-354-0016)
Due to production deadlines. Carmike movie times are only
accurate through March 12. Visit www/lagpole.com for
updated times.
All Along (NR) 7:00, 9:00 (W. 3/11-Th. 3/12)
Coraline 3-D (PG) 1:30, 4:30, 7:30, 10:00
Friday the 13th (R) 1:55, 4:45. 7:15, 9:40
He's Just Not That Into You (PG-13) 1:00, 4:00
Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience (G)
12:00, 1:55, 3:50, 5:45, 7:40, 9:35
Madea Goes to Jail (PG-13) 1:30, 4:15, 7:00, 9:30
Paul Blart: Mall Cop (PG) 4:50, 7:00, 9:10
Slumdog Millionaire (R) 1:20, 4:20, 7:00, 9:35
Street Fighter The Legend of Chun-Li (PG-13)
12:30, 2:45, 5:00, 7:30, 9:45
Taken (PG-13) 1:00, 3:10, 5:20, 7:30. 9:40
The Velveteen Rabbit (G) 1:05
Watchmen (R) 12:00, 1:00, 1:30, 3:30, 4:30, 5:00,
7:00, 8:00, 8:30, 10:25, 11:30
CINl (706-353-3343)
Girls Rock! (PG)/The Golden Eaglet (NR) 2:00 (Sa.
3/14-Su. 3/15) (add'l time Sa. 3/14: 7:00)
Gran Torino (R) 4:30, 9:30 (starts F. 3/13)
Milk (R) 7:00, 9:45 (new times F. 3/13: 4:15, 7:00,
9:45) (add'l time Sa. 3/14-Su. 3/15:1:30)
Revolutionary Road (R) 4:15 (ends Th. 3/12)
Waltz with Bashir (RJ 4:30, 7:15, 9:30 (new times F.
3/13: 7:30) (add'l time Sa. 3/14-Su. 3/15: 2:15)
GEORGIA SQUARE 5 (706-548-3426)
Due to production deadlines, Georgia Square Five movie
times are only accurate through March 12. Visit www.
Flagpole.com for updated times.
Bedtime Stories (PG) 12:45, 3:05, 5:25, 7:45, 10:05
Bolt (PG) 12:50, 5:20, 10:00
Bride Wars (PG) 3:10, 7:40
Inkheart (PG) 1:05, 4:05, 7:05. 9:40
Marley 4 Me (PG) 1:10,7:10
Twilight (PG-13) 1:00, 4:15, 7:15, 9:55
Valkyrie (PG-13) 4:10, 9:45
MWY 17 DRIVE-IN THEATERS (706-213-7693)
TWilight (PG-13) 7:00 (F. 3/13-Su. 3/15)
TATE CENTER THEATER (706-542-6396)
When a Woman Ascends the Stain (NR) 6:00 (W.
3/18)
UGA STUDENT LEARNING CTR. (706 542-7000)
Life and Debt (NR) 7:00 (M. 3/16, rm 213)
Perry the filmmaker peaked well before
his films' popularity.
MAR LEY & ME (PG) Two newlyweds.
John and Jennifer (Owen Wilson and
Jennifer Aniston), learn a lot about
life, love and loss from their lovable,
boisterous, uncontrollable Yellow
Lab, Marley. Based on John Grogan’s
autobiographical novel, Marley & Me
boasts the purebred screenwriting
pedigree of Oscar-norriinee Scott Frank
(Get Shorty, Out of Sight. The Lookout)
and Don Roos (Tlte Opposite of Sex,
Happy Endings).
METROPOLITAN OPERA:
MADAMA BUTTERFLY (NR)
Anthony Minghella's production of
the Puccini opera features Cristina
Gailardo-Domas in the title role oppo
site Marcello Giordani.
MILK (R) Thirty years have passed
since pioneering gay rights activist
Harvey Milk (Sean Penn) was assas
sinated by fellow San Francisco city
supervisor Dan White (Josh Brolin),
and the exceptional new film chroni
cling the last eight years of Milk's
life, including its tragic end. begs the
question: How far have we come? It’s
an emotional wake-up slap delivered
with perfect performances and neces
sary style. An award-winning film
will always be an effective means
to increase recognition and achieve
validation in our nation of movie lov
ers. The film never apologizes for nor
sanitizes Milk's homosexuality. He was
here; he was queer; get over it. •
< MISS MARCH (R) Two of the
Whitest Kids U’Know get in the feature
game with this thankfully R-rated
teensploitation flick. Eugene (co-writer-
director Zack Cregger), has recently
awakened from a four-year coma to
discover his virginal high school
sweetheart is a Playboy Playmate.
Naturally, his sex-crazed best bud,
Tucker (Trevor Moore, the other writer- •
director), convinces him to crash a
party at the Playboy Mansion. I thought
this flick looked terrible when I saw the
trailer for the first time, but subsequent
viewings have softened me up a little.
With Craig Robinson (“The Office’).
PAUL BLART: MALL COP (PG) Paul
Blart: Mall Cop rings in the New Year
with mild, unobjectionable humor. The
beginning of the year usually suffers
through flicks much less funny and
much more painful than this. Paul
Blart: Mall Cop is as likable and funny
(more the former than the latter) as
its star.
RACE TO WITCH MOUNTAIN (PG)
I’m filled with so much nostalgia for
Disney’s Kim Richards/Eddie Albert
originals, Escape to Witch Mountain
and Return from Witch Mountain, that
I’m actually excited for the remake
starring Dwayne “The Rock’ Johnson
and that girl who’s not Dakota Fanning.
A Vegas cabbie (Johnson) must assist
a UFO expert (Carla Gugino) and
two orphans (AnnaSophia Robb and
Alexander Ludwig) outrun the govern
ment (represented by Ciaran Hinds)
and an alien bounty hunter. Look for
cameos by original orphans Richards
and Ike Eisenmann.
REVOLUTIONARY ROAD (R) Frank
and April Wheeler (Leonardo DiCaprio
and Kate Winslet) feel destined for
something better, more fulfilling than
their hopeless, empty suburban exis
tence. But two kids and a mortgage
later, and these former idealists are at
each other's throats, their love burned
away by the constant heat of angry
disappointment. Those who hated
American Beauty won’t warm to it;
neither will the modern suburbanites •
Mendes vilifies by proxy. Nevertheless,
mature filmgoers will revel in the craft „
and wince at the pain.
SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE (R) If
Charles Dickens had set any of his
littlest-orphan-makes-good epics
in the slums of Mumbai and on the
uncomfortable future-chic stage of the
10‘ FUCPOtE.COM 1 - MARCH ii 1 w