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I moved here from New York in 2003,
and I'm here to tell you that it was
the best decision I ever made. For
context, I am a musician because I moved
here to be a musician. Why I moved here is
immaterial (it rhymes with "I met my future
bandmates on. the Internet"). I put down
roots in this Southern town, this town where I
had not spent more than two days' time prior
to my move, this town where I moved into a
house with total strangers based entirely on
faith and luck. Since then I've had the privi
lege and pleasure of writing, recording and
performing music with horribly named bands
like We Versus the Shark, Pegasuses : XL and
■ Dark Meat. I have yelled at people in base
ments and toured overseas and played to
empty, empty rooms (in that order). This week
I have been charged with offering advice to
newly arrived persons interested in the world-
famous (really) Athens music community.
Okay. But first, a joke:
A little boy comes home from his
firstbass lesson and his father asks,
"So, how was your first lesson?" The
little boy replies, "Oh, it was good.
I learned that the top string is the
E string and the next down is the A
string." His father is pleased.
The next day, when the boy comes
• home again, his father asks, "How
was your lesson today?" The boy says,
"Skipped it. I had a gig."
Learn a new instrument. Learn two new
instruments. Take the instrument you hated
the most all of your life and learn it, because
guess what, it's played a central role in at
least one dozen of the most beautiful record
ings you have not heard yet. So, get a jump
on yourself and learn the clarinet.
Do you need to start from square one
and just learn an instrument? Then do it. It
is astonishingly easy. It's advisable to do it
loudly. Our Western ears are attuned to a very
limited palate of sonority, and the Internet
just told me that North Americans only make
up eight percent of the world population.
So, even while you're learning, while you're
totally sucking so much that your friends can't
believe you're wasting your time, you can be
comforted by the knowledge that someone,
somewhere probably thinks you sound pretty
right-on. (The loudness aspect applies to
vocals, too. I've found that applying a robust
degree of force and projection to your voice is
a good precursor to learning your way around
the concept of pitch; in fact, in some cases, it
can supplant pitch altogether.)
If you can't afford or find something, make
it yourself. I have witnessed the construction
of terrifying obelisks stuffed with magnets
and wire that can knock down walls. I have
seen colors and shapes juxtaposed in ways
God never imagined but certainly intended.
Creating something isn't that impressive until
you pause to realize that what you just made
didn't exist before. If you don't know how
to make it, whatever it may be—an amp, a
poster, or a song—you can ask someone for
help. I do it all the time. Athens is like a boot
camp crossed witti a support group: working
hard is a requirement, but if you can pull your
weight, people are happy to help. I repeat:'
I moved here from New York in 2003 and I
am here to tell you that people in AtheYis are
nice. The other bands are nice. The club own
ers are nice. The music and music equipment
store owners are nice. Even the ones that
don't act nice are probably nice but in secret
(most of them, anyway).
Go and learn and listen and study. For
starters, walk into Wuxtry Records and ask
John Fernandes to play you anything he
wants. Witness the startling hustle of Allison
Weiss. Put a beer in Jim McHugh's hand and
let him tell you a story. For at least a little
while, work a shitty job (this part is manda
tory). Unless it's absolutely necessary, ride
your bike. Coerce sad friends into becoming
part of a team that they didn't know they were
needed for. Rely on others—and be willfully
relied upon—but hold yourself to a standard
of autonomy. Know that generally people are
going to want to dance but write that bummer
ballad, too. If it isn't fun, don't do it. But if
it is fun, do it all the time. And I hope you
think practicing is fun, because you really do
need to do it all the time. Bolster yourself for
failure, because, oh, boy, it's coming. It is the
antecedent to success.
Check it out: I read a funny story once in a
magazine that recently, went out of business,
and unfortunately I'm paraphrasing: In the
late 70s, someone walked into a room where
Ricky Wilson from The B-52s was playing gui
tar. He was laughing. What's so funny? "I just
wrote the dumbest riff ever!" was his proud
reply. "Rock Lobster" went on to be one of the
top five songs ever written to make reference
to something called a "bikini whale." Right
around that time, art students started to have
parties and peopled danced on top of cars—
this is well documented. Wilson aside, no one
in The B-52s was a "musician," at least not a
musician the way it might be defined in, say,
Nashville. It didn't matter. It doesn't matter.
Jeff Tobias
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AUGUST 12,2009 • FlAGPOLE.COM 31