Newspaper Page Text
MATTERS OF THE HEART AND LOINS
I recently met a guy and we totally hit it
off. He is a friend of a friend, so I know a lot of
his history and I know I can trust him, etc. We
met out one night with a big group of friends
and it seemed like after a few minutes there
was no one else there. There were other people,
but not for us. We exchanged phone
numbers at the end of the night
and decided we would
see each other again.
He actually called me
the next day, which has
never ever in the history
of guys happened to me
before, since I always
seem to wind up with
the "don't want to
seem too eager " ones,
and we went out the
next night.
Things were great.
We talked forever, have
tons in common, and he
was very gentlemanly and
politely kissed me after walking to my door and
did not seem to expect anything, which is also
very new to me, and a relief, since I'm kind
of a prude—at least compared to my friends.
We talked again the next day and the next. We
sent some texts to each other in between. This
is the most perfect guy I have ever met.
And now the problem. He is leaving. He is
visiting our mutual friend from out of state and
is going back in a couple weeks to start a new
job. It's a couple hours away. How do I handle
that? I have a car and
everything, and it wouldn't
be impossible to keep
seeing him, but I have
never had a long-distance
relationship before and I
don't know if I can. I also
am not totally sure that
he wants one, but he has
mentioned coming back to
visit. I don't know what to
do because this guy is so
perfect for me that I don't
want to let him go. But
I do know that I need to
stay and finish school this
year and figure out what
to do for me. But, oh, my
God, I really want him to
stay. I want to make this
work. What should I do and
how should I explain all of this to him? I know
I will regret it if I just let this guy go out of my
life forever without ever even trying.
Help me!
First, focus on enjoying the next couple of
weeks and getting to know him as if things
were going to proceed normally. When his
departure time gets closer (like a couple days
away), then see how you feel. The magic may
have worn off by then. If not, see how he
feels, and if you think he might want to try
to keep this thing going. A couple hours is a
long way away, but technology is a beauti
ful thing, and the magic of cell phones and
the Internet will make it much easier for you
to feel close to him (and think of the phone
sex!). Have a conversation before he leaves.
Ask him what he wants, and talk about what
you can realistically do to see each other. It is
possible to make it work, but you have to set
ground rules right away and make sure you are
communicating. You may end up seeing each
other when you can and seeing other people
in the meantime, which would be fine, too. Try
to be practical. It is your senior year, which
means you will have a lot of work to do and
you are going to meet a lot of people. Maybe .
if it works out you can move closer to him
when you are done with school, but don't
count on it because you don't want to
plan your whole life around a guy you
have just met. Try to keep an open
mind and have fun.
I am 30 years old and I
apparently cannot tell when
I am being hit on. My friends
will give me hell after a girl
walks away from me because
they're like "Dude! Why didn't
you ask her out?" or "Man, that
chick was totally into you!" I
can't tell if they are full of it
or if I am really that clueless.
How can I fix this? I don't
want to assume that a girl
is hitting on me just because she talks to me,
but I am not looking forward to a monastic
lifestyle, either.
Clueless
If you know your friends well, then you
should know by now whether they know what
the hell they are talking about or not. Also, I
assume you would know whether or not they
are kidding. If you tend to be the guy in the
group who never has a ladyfriend and your
friends mostly do, and if
they are the kind of guys
who are genuinely try
ing to help you out, then
you should probably trust
them. If you're hanging
out with the extras from
the panty scene in Pretty
in Pink, then you are
probably right to ignore
them. I may be way off-
base here, but I feel like
women (and even "girls")
these days are more likely
to pursue you if they are
interested, so you may be
right to err on the side of
caution. For example, if
the girl is talking to you
enthusiastically about
something because it is
her job (waitress, bartender, salesperson of-
some kind), then it is not safe to assume that
you are being hit on. And trust me when I
tell you that it gets really annoying to have
people assume that just because you're being
nice to them that your interest is anything
but professional. On the other hand, if you
notice that one of your forearms is starting to
dwarf the other from overuse, it may be time
to retrieve your head from your lower intestine
and ask somebody out. Sorry, man, but with
out more to go on, that's the best I can do.
Confidential to Susie QT: Get. The Hell. Out.
Now. Your friends are afraid to tell you the
truth because they think you won't listen. I
think you know what you should do and you
are waiting for somebody to say it. It's time.
Jyl Inov
Got a question for Jyl? Submit your anonymous inquiry
via the Reality Check button at www.flagpole.com.
| wigs I make-up
Junkman's
Daughter’s
Brother
453 E. Clayton St
706.543.4454
The Early
Bird Catches
LEG
AVENUE
| more
GLIIV/O.
Import Company
Saturday, August 22nd
Come Join Us For Our Re-Opening
Under New Management!
$ 2 DOMESTICS
$ 1 CHAMPAGNE
Come see our new
owner, Richard, during
our soft re-opening...
guaranteed not to he
soft for long.
246 E. Clayton
&
AUGUST 19,2009 FLAGP0LE.COM 39,