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Staying Together, Growing Together Houston A PUBLICATION OF THE HOUSTON HEALTHCARE COMPLEX Staying Together... Tmv i'orUtlwm s anyone struggling to raise a family know s, there's more to n than |iist being together. But that's a start, said Stephanie Warren, a licensed clinical social worker w ith the Counseling and Psychological Services Center at the Houston Health Pavilion. "I ve decided over time that 'quantity versus quality time' is a mvth." said Warren. "It is quantity time that counts. When you try. especially w ith younger kids, to create special times to he together on an adult schedule, you're trying to lit the child into that pu/./le. And often you miss each other. It's the errands anil the normalcy ol everyday lile that’s a plus for success." But because we live in such a last-paced world, even the closest families often have little time to spend together. So how can families make the most of the opportunities they have? Try incorporating these suggestions to enrich family life: • I urn oil the television and go outside for some family time together. television is not interactive enough. Warren said. "One idea might he making a deal with your kids that lor every 30 minutes you and your children spend watching television, you'll spend 30 minutes outside doing something together." • lalk to each other. And listen - really listen -to what your children have to say. Being approachable and open minded is the best way to ensure two way communication w ith children. • Pick a set time and eat dinner together every night. Again, turn oil the television and enjoy food that nurtures both body and soul. "I like to call it 'going back-to-the-tahle.’ " Warren said. "I know parents have teenagers. I N T H I s I s S U E : Crowing Together... a Successful family Caution... Mixing Food and Medicines Summer 1999, Volume €5, Issue 3 they ve all got things to do and it's hard to hav e a sit-down dinner. But one of the things I remember from tin childhood is that I always knew where my place at the dinner table was." I he menu doesn't have to be elaborate to work. "There's just somethin!* nurturing about dinner time." Warren said. "It can be pi//a as long as vou re all together." • families can get reacquainted when parents get involved in children's activities, and children get involved in appropriate adult happenings, she said Parents and children also can gel to know each other during casual conversations set to routine activities such as washing the family dot*. " I hat s when parents gel close to kids, during the downtime, when they do normal things together." she said. • Put the marriage first and try to stay together. "Kids are most successful when they come from two-parent families." she said. "We re bombarded with the politically correct message that just one person can raise a family, but that's not always so. And the family is the basis of everything." I or married couples, that means keeping their relationship strong. Warren said. "You won't have healthy kids unless you have a healthy marriage." she said. Anil kills know when there s tension. I hey act out when they know the marriage is not secure." l or more information about building successful families, contact the Counseling and Psychological Services Center at 923-3835. Help... For The Underinsured ML