Newspaper Page Text
28 THE
Story Corner
A matron of the mosl determined character
was encountered by a young woman
reporter on a country paper, who was
sent out to interview leading citizens as
to their politics. "May 1 see Mr. ?"'
she asked of a stern-looking woman who
opened the door at one house. "No, you
cant,'" answered the matron, decisively.
"Hut I want to know what' party he belongs
bo,*' pleaded the girl. The woman
drew up her tall figure, "Well, take a
good look at me," she said, "I'm the party
he belongs to!"
A pleasantry in a recent paper reminds
me of something which happened
in the days of my youth. Marcus Morton,
Democrat, having been chosen governor
of Massachusetts, a Whig minister,
in closing his pulpit reading of the governor's
Thanksgiving Proclamation, punctuated
its signatures as follows: "Marcus
Morton, Governor? John A. Bowles,
Secretary? God save the Commonwealth
of Massachusetts!"?G. L., C.
A man who stuttered badly went to a
specialist and aften ten difficult lessons
learned to say quite distinctly, "Peter
Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers
His friends congratulated him upon this
splendid achievement. "Yrs" saia ??<?
man doubtfully, "but It's s-s-such a
d-d deucedly d-d-d-d itliculi rent-mark to
w-w-work into an ordin-n-nary c-c-convers-s-sa-tion,
y' know."?Everybody's
Magazine.
Professor (coming front his club holding
up triumphantly his umbrella to his
wife): "You see, nty dear Alma, how
stupid are all the anecdotes about our
absent-mindedness. You see, I haven't
forgotten my umbrella." Mrs. Professor:
"But, my dear, you didn't take youi
umbrella with you; you loft it at home.'
A gentleman living in Leeds nas a
smart son. When a friend called recently,
the father said to him politely,
"I wish I had another cigar to offer you."'
looking- with regret at the one he was
smoking. Now was the small boy's
chance. "I know where they are, pa,"
he said, dragging open a drawer and
bringing out a box of a choice brand.
THE FAILURE OF A COLLEGE
EDUCATION.
"Well,"' observed old man Potts, "I've
spent a heap of money on my boy Bill's
? *? ? *?- * " *"
vuu^uuu?uiwcu wine nun urea aonars
jest to see liim through Yale. And 1
ain't through yet. It shorely makes nie
sore to think of the money I'm wastin'
on a boy who ain't got as much sense
now as he had before he went to
college."
"What's the matter, father?" asked
Mrs. Potts. "Mebbe you're a little hard
on Bill."
"No, I ain't, Mary," answered the old
man. "Just to show you: A little while
ago I says to him I thinks it was going to
. rain tomorrow. What fool answer d'ye
surjfiose he made me?"
"I'm sure I don't know, father."
"He begged niy pardon!"?Harper's
Weekly.
y ^
) PRESBYTERIAN OF T
:]ro!
v2r?a?
iQOdrK PJ2SL"
J U_h!_ vjlll new ai
7-J Jf 111! 3; 4<ii ? Churct
liollIngatSldc. JAS c w
frvrsip
Is the best \lac>
M in the 'world.
It relieves Cuts,
Tired and ]
immediatelj
cation. Vou
llglll&U Willi
At all Dru
| 25 and 50
1
Buy Your
There are many i
largest in the South,
lower freight rates.
When you come to <
from. You can get J
Therefore, when
headquarters. We v
write tor prices.
Sydnor
"Furniture for the Horn*
Presbyterian
FOR CHRIST!At
Correspondence Course
History, and Doctrine; Foreij
School opens Sept. 9,
Sunday school workers, Bible
For information, addre
REV. GEO. O. BACHf
Electric 1
You limply press the butt
New Orleans Railway
Wa. T. Hardle, Pres. Arthur
WILLIAMS-]
Dry Goods, Notior
209-211-213 and 213
New York Office, 6 Leonard 8
HE SOUTH.
Wilson's
lling Partition
.rvelous convenience atd the most effe<
;ho<l for dividing 1 trge rooms in Church
hool Building i into smail rooms, and vi
made from various kinds of wood; sour
rd air tight; easily opera'ed and lastin
dso with Blackboard surface. FilUd
nd old buildines. Used in over 180
les acd Public Buildings. Mcntk
ttrian of the South for free pamphlet.
> Venetian Blindi. Wood Block Floors,
and Rolling' Steel Shutters
USON MFG. CO., 1 6 S W. l?lh S?. New 1
TTiTOTTrcfa!
cident insurance" y*
Bruises, Sprains, f W A
Blistered Feet,
Furniture F
reasons wny you should. Our
We buy In carload lots and get
and the goods reach us in perf<
jur store you have big assortnx
lust what you want,
you visit Richmond, make ou
rill be glad to see you. If you
& Hundley, I
) Beautiful" 709-11-13 E. Bra
Bible Trainir
? WUKKbKS, IMA8HVILLE, TE
?iu the En glish Bible; Sund
?n Missions; Home Missions,
1909.?Cours es for Home an<
teachers. Pa stors' assistants,
!8S
d AN, Supt. 1032 Monro'
Light and F
on and pay only (or what yon u
A Light Co. 317
A. Caat&nedo, Vice-Prea. M. M
MCHARDSO]
Importer* and Jobber* of
is and Men's Fun
Magazine, 512 Common and 511
L P. O. Drawer 581.
?
May ig, 1909.
fork 'tolling Above.
^SKATING
%
rom Us
stock is the
lower prices,
set condition,
jnts to select
r store your
/"?a nnnf onmo
nc.,
ad, Richmond,Va.
ig School
NN.
ay school work; Church
etc.
1 Foreign Missionaries,
settlement workers, etc.
e St., Nashville, Tenn.
'owcr
se. Expert advice free.
Baronne Street.
NEW ORLEANS, LA.
. Hardie, Bec'jr St Treaa
N" CO., Ltd.
*
nishing Goods
i Qravler Sts.
NEW ORLEANS, LA.