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♦ SATURDAY, JANAURY 6, 2007
2C
Movie Picks
By MATTSOERGEL
Morris News Sen'ice
CHILDREN OF MEN (4
stars): This bleak and abso
lutely riveting story looks
at a totalitarian England in
a planet without children.
Filmmaker Alfonso Cuaron
and crew dunk you fully in
that world; it’s the best sci
ence-fiction film in years,
though it shouldn’t be con
signed strictly to that sci-fi
ghetto. This is great film
making, period. R.
FREEDOM WRITERS
(3 stars): Another inspira
tional-teacher yarn based
on a true story. This one’s
pretty good, turning into a
real crowd-pleaser. It stars
Hilary Swank, who leads
her pupils into the world
of books to show how their
lives relate to others around
the world.
(Brandy Hildboldt Allport,
The Times-Union). PG-13.
HAPPILY NEVER
AFTER (1 star): Woeful
computer-animated kids’
movie set in Fairy Tale land,
where all the stories now
have unhappy endings. PG.
DREAMGIRLS (3 1/2
stars): In this movie ver
sion of the Broadway hit,
Jennifer Hudson gives a
standout performance as
the most talented member
of a Supremes-style sing
ing group. But don’t forget
Eddie Murphy’s raunchy
R&B singer - Murphy looks
as the decades have dropped
from him, he’s having so
much fun. This vibrant musi
cal has that effect. PG-13.
ROCKY BALBOA (3
stars): It isn’t great, but it
isn’t close to embarrassing,
which was a very real dan
ger. Instead, it offers just the
right mix of sentiment and
rueful humor and even plau
sibility, especially in that first
hour, a mellow time before
the trumpets blare and he
puts on those gray sweats to
start working out. PG.
NIGHT AT THE
MUSEUM (3 stars): A
high-concept kiddie comedy
- museum exhibits come to
life at night - that works
because it makes its jokes
quickly, keeps them coming,
and then has the smarts to
wrap them up without much
fuss. Ben Stiller stars. PG.
WE ARE MARSHALL
(2 stars): Marshall
University’s football team
struggles on and off the field
after the previous year’s
team was killed in plane
crash. It’s a great story, but
as a movie it’ll have to settle
for just OK, with too many
of the trappings of the cli
ched sports story. Matthew
McConaughey stars. PG.
THEGOODSHEPHERD
(2 stars): Robert De Niro
directs this long, ambitious
story about the birth of the
CIA. Some fine moments
here and there, but it might
test your patience: Leading
man Matt Damon is meant
to be a big zero, and he
is. Surely a human hearts
beats under the white shirt
of even the most repressed
spy, doesn’t it? Not here. R.
THE PURSUIT OF
HAPPYNESS (3 1/2 stars):
Will Smith and his real-life
son Jaden make for some
strong chemistry in this
story of a homeless man and
his son, struggling to survive
while he tries to become a
stockbroker. It’s going to be
a big hit. PG-13.
ERAGON (2 1/2 stars):
A fantasy about a boy and
his dragon, a long time ago.
It borrows from Lord of the
Rings, Star Wars and who
knows what else, but is corny
enough fun that it’ll likely
please its intended youngish
audience. PG.
BLOOD DIAMOND (2
1/2 stars): A political thrill
er set during the civil war in
Sierra Leone, with chases,
massacres, beautiful scenery,
treachery and some heavy
handed speechifying. The
sturdy plot has few surprises,
but the picture moves briskly
enough; it never really drags.
Leonardo DiCaprio stars in a
role that once would have
gone to Bogie. R.
HAPPY FEET (3 stars):
A musical comedy, adven
ture and a message movie
- with penguins (and the
voices of Elijah Wood, Robin
Williams, Hugh Jackman
and others). PG.
ijjL It t*
Lionßgate
Prince Humperdink, voiced by Patrick Warburton, and Ella, voiced by Sarah Michelle Gellar, star in ‘Happly’.
Happily N’Ever After has limited charm
By MATT SOERGEL
Morris Ne ws Service
Thank goodness for the
Seven Dwarfs, a bunch
of backwoods survivalists
with names such as Billy
Bob, Cletus and Bubba.
Two-thirds of the way
through Happily N’Ever
After, they brighten it
up considerably, but are
shoved aside after four,
perhaps five minutes of
screen time.
They’re missed.
Happily N’Ever After is
a computer-animated tale
that would like to remind
you of Hoodwinked, but
won’t. It’s a revision
ist fairy tale of extremely
limited charm, in which
Cinderella (the voice of
Sarah Michelle Gellar)
overlooks the dreamy Rick
the Kitchen Boy (Freddie
Reel Releases
Sensational crime stories remain abstract
By STEVEN UHLES
Morris News Service
The unfortunate truth
about sensational crime sto
ries is that for most of us,
they remain fairly abstract.
Take for instance the recent
spree of prostitute murders
in the small English city of
Ipswich.
For most Americans, the
plight of streetwalkers in a
town most will never see is
terrible, but only because
intellectually we under
stand that it should be.
That is, until we decide to
spend our Christmas vaca
tion in said city.
For the past few weeks,
I’ve been vacationing with
my family in England,
spending quality time with
my wife’s terribly British
family.
Now ordinarily, I would
think nothing of the odd
Top CDs of 2006
By Steven Vbles
Morris News Service
10. Ghostfaee Killah -
Fishscale: A true return to
form, the former maverick
MC from the Wu Tang col
lective marries O7os soul,
the most slippery beats and
a nearly cinematic sense of
storytelling to the most vital
record of his solo career.
The Clan may no longer
be a going concern, but if
its collective members can
keep releasing records like
this, well, it’s a price worth
paying.
9. TV On The Radio
- Return To Cookie
Mountain: Be wary, this
one’s a creeper. Like a
young U 2, TV is a naturally
big and burly act that seems
destined to rock arenas. A
true musical amalgamation,
the band’s sound has always
been based around an inter
est in techno, rock and hip
hop. Cookie Mountain finds
more of the same, this time
with a sense of polish.
8. Rosanne Cash - Black
Cadillac: Completely hon
est and direct, this dark but
surprisingly accessible col
lection of songs deal open
ly with Ms. Cash’s grief
over the loss of her father
(Johnny Cash), stepmoth
er (June Carter Cash) and
At A Glance
Happily N’Ever After
1 out of 4 stars
Who’s it for? Kids in the
audience I saw it with laughed
about five times.
Credits: With the voices
of Sigourney Weaver, Sarah
Michelle Gellar, Freddie
Prinze Jr., Andy Dick and
Wallace Shawn. Directed by
Paul J Bolger.
Running time: 1 hour, 22
minutes.
Family guide: PG Some
mildly rude humor.
Prinze Jr.) as she chases
after pompous Prince
Humperdink (Patrick
Warburton).
It’s set in Fairy Tale Land,
where the chief wizard has
gone golfing in Scotland,
excursion into the city or
even a quiet stroll down
the street to the local pub,
but this trip found me a bit
wary.
You see, my wife’s sister
lives less than 15 minutes
from Ipswich and one of the
serial killing suspects was
collected from his home,
less than a mile from her
home.
Yikes.
While it’s true that even
the least discerning of serial
killers would ever mistake
me for a prostitute (I just
don’t have the legs for it), it
certainly brought the idea of
the man-as-monster hunt
ing the innocent home. And
while I’d like to say that my
thoughts were focused on
the fragility of life and what
might make a moral com
pass skew so terribly, the
truth is it got me thinking
about serial killer movies.
mother (Vivien Liberto Cash
Distin), her relationship
with her family and find
ing the reserves required to
move on with her own life.
Although the subject matter
seems stark, the songs are
as easy to embrace as any in
Ms. Cash’s long and produc
tive career.
7. Ornette Coleman
- Sound Grammar: The
first “new” release by
the jazz master in nearly
a decade, Grammar finds
Mr. Coleman still willing to
experiment and, as has so
often been his way, mak
ing those experiments pay
dividends. This time out,
Mr. Coleman is playing with
a pair of basses, on picked,
the other bowed. The result
is wonderfully dense compo
sitions that still manage to
leave plenty of space for the
signature Coleman sound.
6. Jerry Lee Lewis -
Last Man Standing: Just
when the industry had writ
ten this rock pioneer off as a
relic, he stormed the palace
gates with a raucous set
of duets that prove there’s
still plenty of fire left in
the Killer’s belly. Standout
tracks include the substan
tially re-arranged version of
the Zep chestnut Rock and
Roll with Jimmy Page sit
ting in and a Fogerty assist
LIFESTYLE
leaving the scale that bal
ances good and evil in the
hands of his two assistants
(motley pint-sized and very
occasionally amusing crea
tures voiced by Andy Dick
and Wallace Shawn).
But now the Evil
Stepmother has taken over,
and all the happy endings
are turning into rotten
ones.
Or something like that.
Happily N’Ever After has
a few OK one-liners, and one
pretty good one, in which
a daffy fairy godmother,
slightly confused, appears
before Cinderella: “I have
come to grant your wish
to be a real boy.” But even
that fairy godmother runs
out of gas, and is reduced to
calling Cinderella - are you
ready? - “Salmonella.” The
film is choppily edited. The
soundtrack has some tinny,
What can I say, I’m a crea
ture of habit. Here are a few
of my favorites:
MAN BITES
DOG (1992)
This French mockumen
tary finds a film crew in
cahoots with a bloodthirsty
thief in the middle of a
spree. Alternately terrifying
and terribly funny, the film
hinges on the unbalanced
charisma of star Benot
Poelvoorde.
M (1931)
An interesting twist on
the idea of it takes a thief to
catch a thief, M centers on
the criminal community in
a German city joining forces
to find, try and sentence
the child killer police have
been unable to capture. The
still-provocative film stars a
then-unknown Peter Lorre
as the killer.
ed Travelin’ Band.
5. The Thermals - The
Body, The Blood, The
Machine: Brave and bois
terous, the Portland, Ore.-
based Thermals write politi
cal polemics that double
dog dare listeners not to
bob their heads in political
approval. Is it propaganda?
Oh, probably. But the soar
ing sincerity of a song like
Pillar of Salt makes any
brainwashing that might
occur seem worthwhile.
4. M. Ward - Post-
War: Current champion
of abstracted Americana
(Ryan Adams, he stole your
belt while you weren’t look
ing), M. Ward seems to spin
his beautiful sepia-toned
tunes with no effort at all.
Sounding, like so many
great albums are, like it was
recorded back-porch live,
Post-War is the rare record
that actually is all about the
tunes.
3. Arctic Monkeys -
Whatever People Say I
Am, That’s What I’m Not:
Sometimes, it seems, the
hype is right. Widely hailed
as the new kings of British
rock, this improbably young
Sheffield band brings both
noise and nuance to its
street-sawy songs. A crush
ing debut by a band that
seems destined for either
anonymous rock songs. As
for the computer anima
tion, I’ll finally follow my
grandmother’s advice about
if you can’t say anything
nice about somebody ...
The Evil Stepmother,
by the way, is played by
Sigourney Weaver, whose
heart does not seem to be
into this Evil thing. Perhaps
because she has to say
“Evil” things like: “Heads
up, Cindy. Stepmother’s on
her way.”
Or perhaps she’s wincing
at the tight corsets that help
give her cartoon character a
va-va-va-voom figure that
out-Jessica Rabbits Jessica
Rabbit.
This Evil Stepmom defi
nitely has far too many dan
gerous curves for a kiddie
movie, even one as desper
ate for entertainment as
this one.
PEEPING TOM
(1960)
Set in Swinging O6os
London, this thriller
attempts to dissect the com
pulsion to kill. In this case,
it’s a photographer’s obses
sion with trying to capture
the moment of death on
film. Smart cinema that
manages to think abstractly
without ever wearing its
metaphors on its sleeve.
TARGETS
(1968)
While the concept of an
aging Boris Karloff playing
an aging horror star might
seem a little too tongue
in-cheek in today’s post-
Scream climate, the truth
is Target, which deals with
both Hollywood history and
a serial slayer, is an unusu
ally original and still-satis
fying cinematic treat.
greatness or the most epic
case of sophomore slump in
musical history.
2. Bob Dylan - Modern
Times: For the past several
years, every Dylan release
has been greeted with much
bowing and scraping and
proclamations of “Classic”
Bob’s return. Baby, those
records were just warm-ups.
Mark my word, when the
Book of Bob is compiled and
completed, Modern Times
will rank with Blood On
The Tracks and Blonde On
Blonde. It’s just that good.
It might have been the best
album of the year had it
not been for those pesky
upstarts...
1. Gnarls Barkley - St.
Elsewhere: Very rarely
does an act emerge with a
record widely understood to
be an instant classic. While
the world was set humming
- and rightfully so - by
the infectious single Crazy
this is a stellar set of songs
from top to bottom. Catchy,
clever and able to hit each
and every track with just
the right measure of pop,
rock, hip-hop and Southern
super-soul, it’s an album
that will be citied, sermon
ized and yes, spun, for years
to come.
HOUSTON DAILY JOURNAL
Web Watch
By RICH RAY
Morris News Service
Holiday debt
For many folks, January
brings the reality that we
have to actually pay for
the gifts we so doled out
over the holidays. Those
looking for ways to avoid
post-holiday financial
woes, and others need
ing credit-related advice,
may want to read Megan
L. Fowler’s iParenting.
com article, Digging Out
of Holiday Debt. www.
iparenting.com/resources/
articles/holidaydebt.htm
Missin^Money.
com
If you’re interested in
finding funds you may be
owed, the site creators
behind Missing Money.
com can lend a helping
hand. Look for funds in
the forms of forgotten
bank accounts and safe
deposit boxes, neglected
stocks and bonds, insur
ance policies, uncollected
refunds and more.
www.missingmoney.com
New Year’s
resolutions
Are you making a New
Year’s resolution or is it
more like a delusion? Have
you already broken your
New Year’s resolution?
Since experts say that less
than 30 percent of resolu
tions are successful, you
may want to review Self
Help Magazine’s 10 keys
that can help you keep
your resolutions.
www.selfhelpmagazine.
com/articles/holidays/res
olution.html
Popular
resolutions
Your friends at First Gov.
gov care about your reso
lution success, too. In an
attempt to help you suc
ceed, site creators have
compiled this list of pop
ular New Year’s resolu
tions. Click on links to
resolutions to lose weight,
pay off debt, get fit, reduce
stress at work and volun
teer to help others and to
find help, information and
resources for achieving
your goals, www.firstgov.
gov/Citizen/Topics/New
Yearsßesolutions.
shtml
Fast food
Is your favorite fast-food
triple cheeseburger with
extra bacon and mayo
really as bad for you as
you suspect? You may not
like the information you’ll
find here, but for the sake
of your health, you should
probably take a peek
at this Chowbaby.com
offering anyway. Review
nutritional and calorie
information for all sorts
of foods served by popu
lar fast-food restaurants
around the First Coast
and across the nation.
www.chowbaby.com/fast
food/ fastfoodnutrition.
asp
First Coast
Fugitives
Is a registered sex
offender or predator liv
ing in your neighbor
hood? Want to find out
more about the most
wanted criminals in our
area? This offering from
Jacksonville.com and
the Florida Department
of Law Enforcement can
help you find such infor
mation and more. Link
to statewide searches for
missing persons and sto
len property, access local
law enforcement agencies
and click to related sites.
www.firstcoastfugitives.
com