Newspaper Page Text
FRIDAY, MARCH 26, 1»58
die iRrt ant Platk
PAGE THREE
-BETTER FACILITIES-
Memorial Hall Remodeling Program
To Provide Modern Student Center
By Gene Owens
Since Student Union moved out of Memorial Hall fall quarter, the building has undergone a pro
gram of renovations aimed toward making available to University students one of the most modern
and complete Student Unions in the South. *
Among the new facilities that will
be offered, Lou Crlsto, Student Un
ion director, said, are a new cafe
teria on the bottom floor to sup
plant the dining facilities in Den
mark Hall, a modernly equipped
snack bar, a large banquet room and
a private dining room, plus numer
ous conference rooms which will be
available to all campus organizations.
Also incorporated in the plans are
a self-service campus store designed
to take the place of the University
book store presently occupying Phi
Kappa Hall and, subject to federal
approval, a University Postoffice.
The roof areas on front of both
wings are planned for outdoor ter-1
races complete with tile floors. The
balcony overlooking the enlarged
ballroom has been made circular,
with circular stairways leading into
the ballroom. The wall separating
the ballroom from the main lobby
has been abolished making it pos
sible to enter the ballroom direct
ly from the lobby.
In the center of the first level
above the lobby will be located a
room designed for small socials or
large meetings. It will accommodate
100 persons at a meeting, Crlsto said.
A skylight and a portico will add
to the beauty of this room, the di
rector noted.
On the top level, a hobby room
University Debate Team Ends
Season After Extensive Travel
“The University debate team travelled approximately 1,200 miles
during this year’s debating season,” said David B. Strother, debate
team coach.
members, Strother added. To become
an active member, he explained, one
must participate in intercollegiate
debates.
The team is active during six of
the nine school months. An active
member devotes an average of 10
hours per week to the debate team,
and in the bIx months of actual de
bating, spends approximately 200
hours with the team.
Although the debaters are inac
tive during spring quarter they, along
with Pi Kappa Delta, national hono
rary debating fraternity, sponsor
several intramural debates.
The team won four keys and eight
individual and team certificates dur
ing the past year.
The debaters entered 70 intercol
legiate contests, 31 of them at col
leges and universities in the South.
The team debated in six tournaments
this year—Carolina Forensics, Ag
nes Scott, All Southern, West Geor
gia, Southeastern and Florida State
Invitational.
As a student activity, the debate
team is open to any interested Uni
versity student. Membership on the
team is not limited to any particular
school or group. There are three
women on the debate team.
Thirteen active members comprise
the team this year, about three times
as many as last year. There is also
an uncalculated number of inactive
REMODELING PROGRESSES ON MEMORIAL HALL
Workmen Construct Side Addition
with facilities for handicrafts and
other hobbies is being constructed.
In designing this feature of the
building the University’s Student
Union has asked the advice of a
number of student unions in other
colleges.
"When this Job is completed,”
Crlsto said, “the University’s Stu
dent Union should be one of the
finest of its type and should do a
great deal to provide for the recrea
tional needs of students and facul
ty at the University."
Blue Key Hold* Ticket Sale
For Barbecue in Legion Hut
Tickets went on sale this week for
the Blue Key barbecue, to be held at
the American Legion Hut Wednes
day from 5:30 to 7 p.m. Priced at
$1.50, they are being sold by mem
bers of Blue Key, national honor
fraternity.
The barbecue is Blue Key's
project for benefit of the Danforth
Chapel drive, which begins on cam
pus this quarter.
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On Campus
with
MaxShukan
(Author of “Barofoot Boy SVitA Chook," oto.J
I’VE GOT NEWS FOR YOU
It is my earnest hope that an occasional column of mine has
pleased you enough to make you want to clip it out and keep it
But I’m sure that being preoccupied with more important things
— like getting down to breakfast before your room-mate eats
all the marmalade — the impulse has passed and been forgotten.
So I am pleased now to report that the makers of Philip Morris
Cigarettes, bless their corporate hearts, have published a booklet
called MAX SHULMAN REVISITED, which contains six of
my favorite columns, along with some brand new material, all
of this profusely illustrated-all of this available to you gratis
when you buy a couple of packs of Philip Morris at your favorite
tobacco counter on or near your campus.
But this is not the only news Pve got for you today. Following
you will find a roundup of news highlights from campuses the
country over.
Southern Reserve University '
Dr. Willard Hale Sigafoos, head of the department of an
thropology at Southern Reserve University and internationally
known as an authority on primitive peoples, returned yesterday
from a four year scientific expedition to the headwaters of the
Amazon River. Among the many interesting mementos of his
journey is his own head, shrunk to the size of a kumquat. He
refused to reveal how his head shrinking was accomplished.
“That’s for me to know and you to find out," he said with a
tiny, but saucy grin.
Northern Reserve University
Dr. Mandrill Gibbon, head of the department of zoology at
Northern Reserve University and known to young and old for
his work on primates, announced yesterday that he had received
a grant of $80,000,000 for a twelve year study to determine
precisely how much fun there is in a barrel of monkeys.
Whatever the results of Dr. Gibbon’s researches, this much
is already known: what’s more fun that a barrel of monkeys is
a pack of Philip Morris. There’s zest and cheer in every puff,
delight in every draw, content and well-being in every fleecy,
flavorful cloudlet. And, what’s more, this merriest of cigarettes,
king-size and regular, comes in the exclusive Philip Morris
Snap-Open pack. A gentle tug on the tab and the package pops
obligingly open. A gentle push on the open pack and it silently
folds itself back, sealing in the savory vintage tobacco until
you are ready to smoke again.
Eastern Reserve University
The annual meeting of the American Philological Institute,
held last week at Eastern Reserve University, was enlivened
by the reading of two divergent monographs concerning the
origins of early Gothic "runes,” as letters of primitive alphabets
are called.
Dr. Tristram I-athrop Spleen, famed far and wide as the
discoverer of the High German Consonant Shift, read a paper
in which he traced the origins of the Old Wendish rune “pt”
(pronounced “krahtz”) to the middle Lettic rune “gr” (pro
nounced "albert”). On the other hand, Dr. Richard Cummerbund
Twonkey, who, as the whole world knows, translated The Pajama
Game into Middle High Bactrian, contended in his paper that
the Old Wendish rune “pt” derives from the Low Erse rune “mf”
(pronounced “gr”).
Well, sir. the discussion grew so heated that Dr. Twonkey
finally asked Dr. Spleen if he would like to step into the gym
nasium and put on the gloves. Dr. Spleen accepted the challenge
promptly, but the contest was never held because there were
no gloves in the gymnasium that would fit Dr. Twonkey.
(The reader is doubtless finding this hard to believe as
Eastern Reserve University is celebrated the length and breadth
of the land for the size of its glove collection. However, the reader
is asked to remember that Dr. Twonkey has extraordinarily
small hands and arms. In fact, he spent the last war working
in a small arms plant, where he received two Navy "E” Awards
and was widely hailed as a “manly little chap.”)
The makers of PHILIP MORRIS, sponsors of this column, urge TOSS
to get to your tobacco store toon for your copy of MAX SHULMAN
REVISITED. The supply is limited.