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6
December 15, 1935
On Ears
Francis Johnson, ’37
Now, it’ this were to be some long,
formal discussion on the ear, I would
begin something like this . . . “The
ear may best be defined as an organ
of hearing. It is situated at the side
of tlie head, and in the higher verte
brates is divided into the outer, mid
dle, and inner ear ...” However, since
I know next to nothing about auditory
canals, semicircular canals and other
such scientific terms, and since you
would be bored to distraction with my
feeble attempts at a discussion like
this, I have decided to curb my am
bitions and make remarks on ears—
just the outer ones, if you please.
Have you ever noticed people’s
ears? Just “people” in general. Well,
those of you who have, will agree with
me when I say that doing so is a very
interesting and amusing pastime. The
best places to view, at one's leisure,
these structures of the human anatomy
are—public conveyances, such as the
street car, subway and bus; for here
one finds a wide and diversified range
of ears. Also, one can indulge in the
wildest flights of imagination and
speculation as to personality, tempera
ment and other qualities of the Unfor
tunate owner and be totally unbiased
and uninfluenced in the results ob
tained, for most of the people seen in
these places are strangers to us. An
other fruitful and everchanging field
is any railway station. For those who
do not have access to the aforemen
tioned points of observation, let me
suggest that chapel, church and class
rooms may be used, although the re
sults will not be quite as gratifying.
Of course, no one thinks exactly as
his friend does; so it is logical (if not
brilliant) to say that no two persons
will observe a pair of ears and come
to the same canclusion. In other
words—every man for himself—How
ever, just to give you an idea of what
this nonsense is all about—permit me
to present in part my classification of
ears—arrived at after much concen
tration, deliberation, hesitation, agita
tion, observation, and -—what have
you!
First, there are two main headings—
I. Those that Do and, II, Those that
Don't.
(“Do” and “Don't” do what?
Stick out from the head, silly!)
Under these two topics come the sub
topics (animated) —
1. Those that Do
A. Large flappy ones—found mostly
on men; usually red in cold wea
ther. The said men will insist on
wearing derby hats that come
down to meet the said appendages.
Large long noses usually come with
ears of this type. Owner always
THE CAMPUS MIRROR
seems to be listening to something.
B. Medium-sized ones—very rare
specimens! In three years of
searching, have only seen two
pairs. They give the owner a
fawn-like appearance—rather at
tractive if on a male who has
other good points to back them up.
II. Those that Don’t
A. Small tight ones—found lai'gely
on women who seem to enjoy wear
ing large ear-rings. On men, the
owners appear to be very meek,
mild inoffensive little men who
say “Yes, dear” to their wives.
B. Happy mediums—should be in a
class to themselves. These are set
on just at the right angle and are
not too large or too small. Found
more on women than on men.
This is just a brief and very rough
idea of what I mean, for there are
many smaller items to go under the
subjects. This is all rather silly and
foolish, but
“Why take life so seriously?
You’ll never get out of it alive.”
The Mortal Twins
Bk.unice Raiford
It was at Hospital X (the whitest
place on earth) where Mrs. Mortal had
just successfully delivered Mary and
Alice Mortal, twins! Nurse Green had
carefully bathed them, administered
silver nitrate to their eyes and was
wheeling them down to ward thirteen,
where she hoped that they would
amuse themselves by either crying or
sleeping.
'She had advanced only a few stejos
down the sparkling corridor when she
met Mr. Mortal.
“How is she?” he asked anxiously.
“Fine!” answered Nurse Green,
“but you’re a bit late. “They are here
already.”
“They?” Mr. Mortal inquired.
“Yes, twins! ’ ’
“Ah;” he exclaimed in disgust. He
took one glance in the direction of the
dear little things and hurried on to
ward seven where his wife lay.
As soon as Nurse Green had made
the babies comfortable in ward thirteen
and was out of hearing distance. Mary
said to Alice, “You know just as quick
as that, I’ve forgotten where we came
from and what they told us we do
here on earth.”
“So have I,” answered Alice. “But,
did you see that look on Mr. Mortal’s
face when he found out we were twins?
Lots he should care. As if we did not
need company on the way. ’ ’
“I didn’t notice,” said Mary, “but
can’t you help me think of the name
of the place we were before we came
here ?’’
“I don’t know,” Alice insisted.
“Oh, I wish I could remember,”
Thoughts From the
Conference
On Monday, December 1), Dr. Frank
lin J. Keller, Director of the National
Occupational Conference, represented
the Conference on Vocational Guid
ance and Education for Negroes at
Speknan chapel services. Dr. Keller
emphasized the fact that even though
a person has a college education and
holds an A.B. or B.S. degree, when he
goes to get a job, these symbols of
knowledge will not, to the possible
employer, be symptoms of skill. If we
would be successful in the world, we
must have knowledge, yes, but it is
necessary to develop, on the basis of
our knowledge, some skill in doing
whatever we plan to do.
On Tuesday, December 11, Presi
dents John W. Davis, of West Virginia
State College, and John Weston, of
Arkansas State College, spoke.
President Davis, husband of Spel-
man’s former Dean of Women, Mrs.
Ethel McGhee Davis, came with a
sparkle of humor which set the audi
ence at attention. He emphasized the
fact that women, in the future, will
have to give more serious thought to
the problems of marriage. He says
that whether a woman marries or not,
there must be in her some sane and
sound ideas and thoughts concerning
the building and maintenance of solid
arity and justice to our race.
President Watson clearly showed
that merely going to college, living in
its artificial environment, and using
its many modern conveniences do not
make the person educated. If we take
nothing to college, we take nothing
away from it, in other words, our lit
tle sparks may either be kindled in
college or be put completely out.
Mary repeatedly fretted. “I recall
something said about pleasures, con
ventions, but, beyond that, I can think
of nothing else that was said about
earth, and what did they say happens
to you after you are here?”
“Oh, stop worrying,” said Alice.
“We’ve waited thousands and thou
sands of years to come here. It is only
now that we can understand what hap
pens to us here. Good or bad, won’t
matter. We won’t be here so long.
Let’s live well here and not fret about
what may come after leaving.”
“But I’d like t - - ”
“Sh-h-h-h, here they come,” Alice
cut Mary off. “They don’t allow you
to talk until you are eighteen months
old. Let’s go to sleep.”
“No, let’s have some music,” Mary
suggested. They crooned Enfrantum’s
Screechology in q flat while Nurse
Green and Mr. Mortal mused, “Aren’t
the\’ darling!”