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GUEST EDITORIAL
Lust In Love
There are many styles of loving. Love
can develop out of friendship, out of play
fulness, out of despair, and out of ideal
ization. People also fall in love and that
is what happens when love is imbued
with a special erotic intensity. We can
call the intensity lust, a vital desire that
energizes not only relationships but artis
tic endeavor and social unrest. Falling in
love is revolutionary. We do so at great
risk. Our lives will change and all we
hold dear will be called into question. It is
no wonder that the very same thing most
of us think we want is what we are most
afraid of.
Universal mortality demonstrates that
everything and everyone we come to
love, we lose. Perhaps falling in love is a
function of our mortality, a temporary
leave of absence from the limitations time
imposes on our being here. In the old
myths love between the gods was always
lackluster—being immortal, there is noth
ing urgent nothing to lose. Throw in a
human element though and you have
intrigue and passion—human lives don’t
last, human affairs begin and end.
In Greek mythology one of the gods’
intermediaries was Chaos’ son Eros.
Eros (our Cupid) served the gods by
bringing the element of human passion
into an otherwise boring heaven. Eros
served humankind by giving them the
taste of the eternal—time stands still in
the face of lovers’ deep bonding. In
Japan this phenomenon is called TEN.
The Japanese say that a day of TEN is
worth ten thousand tranquil days and that
a day of tranquility is worth a year of
ordinary days. In Spanish “Querer”
means to love and to want and to wish, all
three. Eros functions as a bridge span
ning love and wanting and wishing a
bridge connecting eternity and now.
To separate love from lust is a normal
impulse, as normal as fear, as normal as
loss. Promiscuity and pornography are
well-honed examples of our ability to
divide our outsides from our insides. The
price we pay is alienation; our hearts and
our minds cease their natural dialogue,
we can't fuck a friend or love a stranger,
passion is reduced to mechanics and
quantity substitutes for quality.
Alienation is a movement away from
healthy balance toward disease, substance
abuse arid suicide. It is also the basis of
our oppression as lesbians and gay men.
For lesbians and gay men, alienation is
part and parcel of growing up different in
a homophobic, racist and sexist society.
Differences are criticized and that criti
cism is often brutal and deforming. Not
only does it smother our spirits and shit
on our pride, that hateful ignorant criti
cism of our difference breaks our hearts.
We have the choice then to translate
heartbreak into alienation in order to get
as far away from our tormentors (perhaps
in distance, perhaps in style) as fast as we
can. Unfortunately, this effort always
falls short as the worst tormentors are the
ones who grow from our histories and
live like parasites inside us.
We have another choice too, one that
does not involve alienation. We can
acknowledge the heartbreak and go on
trying to let love happen between us. This
is a radical stance. It sows the seeds of
revolution which is always what falling in
love is. And it doesn't stop at falling in
love—this erotic, life affirming impulse
wants to go to work with us, wants to
make our lives and our worlds beautiful
and safe.
In China old porcelain bowls are not
considered really valuable until they are
broken. The broken bowl is pieced back
together and the gaps filled with gold.
Perhaps that practice can help us reframe
our heartbreak. Perhaps a heart is of no
real value until broken open. A heart is a
living thing and gold is too cold to fill the
gaps. Perhaps that is why, despite the
risks, we take a chance and fall in love.
We need something to fill the gaps that is
as alive as we are. Is it that something
that we make when we make love? If
love is a portal to the eternal, a way to
stop time, a bridge between heaven and
earth then why not also something as sim
ple as the healing and making whole of
each of our hearts? Let us hope so.
- Franklin Abbott, M.S.W.
EDITORIAL
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Get Some Help, Dick
It was too good to be true. For almost
ten months now, the Atlanta Journal's
Homophobe-in-Residence, Dick
Williams, has kept his gay-bashing
mouth shut. You could almost feel a col
lective lessening of tension among local
gays and lesbians as it appeared that
Williams’ vitriol had turned tender.
Perhaps the birth of a child to he and
wife Rebecca Chase had mellowed the
monster.
Wrong.
The man with the bobbing bow tie
was back with a vengeance in the Jan. 31
issue of the Journal.
What brought him out from under his
rock? The possibility that the Georgia
legislature might pass a Hate Crimes Bill
that includes the words "sexual orienta
tion."
Why is Williams so terrified that the
state of Georgia will adopt a law that
contains these words? Such legislation
exists all over this country; conservative
members of congress have approved it,
even President Bush, for God’s sake.
And why is Williams' diatribe against
this legislation filled with so many inac
curacies and outright falsehoods? The
man is not dumb, he has access to the
politicians who wrote the bill, the JIC's
huge library and a research staff.
Why is Dick Williams, the man, who
claims he has gay friends and that he has
nothing against gay men and lesbians,
so homophobic?
A couple of months ago we spoke
with a local journalist whose public gay
hating of a decade ago has mellowed
and, most recently, even turned to mild
support of our struggle for equality. We
asked him, 'why the change?' He told us
of an unfortunate incident in college, one
that left him fearful and mistrustful of
gay men. He admitted inflating that one
incident into a crusade against queers.
But, over the years, he met gay men and
lesbians who could be trusted and who
trusted him. And thus, slowly, his fear
has been ameliorated.
The cause of Dick Williams fear, his
phobia, of the legitimization of the rights
of gay men and lesbians must surely be
deeply rooted. This injury or fear or
whatever must be incredibly painful to
him or his writings on the subject would
not be so unreasoned.
In the past we've demanded Williams'
ouster. We’ve attacked his reasoning.
And we've made fun of him. But we've
finally come to realize that what the man
needs is not to be censured or belittled.
Mr. Williams needs professional help for
that part of him that is so terrified of gay
people. We can only pray that he will
realize this and seek that help soon.
Blake's
227 Tenth Street
Atlanta, Georgia 30308
To The Management:
First let me say I have visited your
establishment quite frequently and have
often enjoyed the friendly and attentive
service and pleasant atmosphere.
However, on my last visit (January 25) 1
noticed something that I'm not quite sure
has been there all the time.
As I stood and waited for my turn in
your somewhat limited restroom facilities,
I noticed a wall covered with period adver
tisements featuring Black stereotypical
caricature. As a black gay man I found the
display utterly offensive. You see, it's hard
enough being a minority in this day and
time and gay, too. It's a double whammy!
And your insensitivity to the black gay
community is a harsh blow.
I've never understood why and how gay
people can discriminate. At first I thought
it was a matter of preference, but now I'm
convinced that the matter is of prejudice.
Do not misunderstand my words, I've
never been overtly discriminated against
by any of your staff. However, those sub
tle cues of racism only perpetuate the evil
of racial hatred and divisiveness.
Therefore, I request you remove these
offensive articles from your premises as a
gesture of fellowship and sense of commu
nity and open the door to all who wish to
enter.
We (the gay community) as a people
have to set an example to our non-gay
counterparts that racism, prejudice and
hate cannot and will not be tolerated at any
level. Now is the time for us to unite
against social, cultural, racial and sexual
oppression and we cannot do it as a divid
ed force.
I would appreciate the courtesy of a
response to this letter on your choice of
action in this matter.
Terry Kelsey
At press time Mr. Kelsey had not
received a reply from Blake's. —Ed.
“ GORBY'S CHANGED—HE'S NOT THE MAN I FELL IN LOVE WITH/"
Southern Voice/February 14, 1991