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ATLANTA BARB-Page 8
The Gay Days We Reaieaiber
Peaches Back Door
The Amazing Adventures
Of Super fag
By Laceus Liber
Vol.l, Episode 2, Part 2 of
Conspirac y”
By Liddia Lipshits
In D ecember of 1971. Peach
es Back Door Came over the
horizon as another “Gay” bar
in the big A. Peaches opened
with Diamond Lil on the stages
Diamond opened another great
bar with a terrific show as
usual Peaches Back Door was
done hi different shades of red],
making it a cozy place to corn
gregate. In the days thatPeachi-
es remained, it was located b&
hinjd Funnochio’s off Peachtree
St*-John McBride was the own
er of this place, and as he is
now, was known as a Gay Cru
sader for the Hornophile com
munity. He always greeted
people with a smile and a “hel
lo Mary,” if by chance,* you
happened to meet himi The
Grand Opening featured in ad
dition to lil, a buffetfrom noon
til eight p.m. Over 1,000 people
from 3 states showed up for the
event Lil made a big comeback
that night, doing a performance
after several years of being in
active in show business. In
cluded with her show was a
special show from Greenville
S.C. Among the many perform
ers that appeared at Peaches
Back Door were Wendy, Alli
son, Rachel Wells, the Grease
Sisters (this is where they first
performed), the Gay D eceivers
from New York, Sandy How
ard, KrnestinedJrown, La Vita
Allen, Peral Bailee and many
many more.. Peaches became
so crowded that a larger facil
ity was needed to continue do
ing business. Peaches Back
Door was closed in September
of 1972. John McBride is now
the proud parent of My Houst
Lounge located on West Peach
tree St
Next month; A Gay Par
ade. . .1972 and activities that
followed.
"The Big Jockstrap
When we left our two Fear
less Foes of the Maliciously
Maniacal Dr. Bigotley Gay-
hater, they rushed from the
park to the secret hiding place
of their all purpose phallic pink
and lavender Gaymobile. The,
Terrific Twosome jumped into
it, and Super Fag sets the auto
matic co ntrol which has a pecu
liar sensing device that can
home in to the unique odor
of any sexual object in the
world. They take off for the
location of the USS Bloom-
ersnatcher, which happens to be
in San Diego. Then they rest
in preparation for the prodigi
ous task in the service of Op
pressed Gaydom before them
It is early morning when they
spot the USSBlpomersnatcher.
The Fearless Faggot and The
Laudable Lesbian deftly land
the Gaymobilebehind the ship’s
fantail.
Most of the crew is at morn
ing chow call as the two Ele
gant Emancipators of Gaydom
sneak quietly aboard. In order
to size up the situation, the
Dauntless Dyke covers both
herself and the; Heroic Hum
mer in her fur-edged,flesh
colored cloak, so that they lie
throbbing in disguise in a,dark
corner of the poop deck
Wonder Lez peeks out and
whispers to Super Fag: “Hey,
there’s Dr. Gayhater talking to
an officer on the bridge. And
there’s the big box of jock
straps being lowered to the deck
below!”
In order to overhear the In
sidious Enemy’s conversation,
the Laudable Lesbian and the
Fearless Fagot slowly throb
along the deck to a point close
.under the bridge.
The Intractable Oppressor of
Gays is givingtheofficerahard
sell on die various benefits of
his own model of jockstraps
He goes on seemingly endless
ly, when he suddenly breaks
“Great Onerous Ovaries,"
whispers the Laudable Lesbian
to Super Fag, “Gayhater has
spotted us!”
Th ey hear Gayhater abrupdy
remark to the oiiicer: "i think
you got some queers on
board!”
“What, ” roars the officer, his
tace turning red with rage, “are
you knocking this crew--indeed,
the Navy?”
“Oh, no, no, no. . .” Gay-
hates siuuerS' attempting to pla
cate the aroused prospective
customer. “Certainly not,Iwas
only joking! Ha! Ha! Would
you excuse me for a while, I’d
like to go to the head. ”
The officer agrees, but in the
meantime the Dauntless Duo of
Glorious Gaydom succeed in
slipping below deck. They de
cide to part, splitting the Con
centrating Crotch Irritant be
tween them, in order to double
their chance of success. They
know that the Evil Gayhater
is after them and will stop at
nothing to thwart them
The Heroic Hummer sets out
along the shadows of the gray
bulkhead, deftly concealing his
famous form, clothed in the
lemon chiffon sheath, the pur
ple cloche, and (he peacock
feathered wedgies. “If only they
Did You Know?
The Atlanta Barb is intro
ducing a new column for our
readers. This column will con
sist of informative facts that
most people do not know. We
hope that these bits of infor
mation will benefit our read
ers.,.,;,'./; ; 1 .
How many of oui readers
have been “bumped” from an
Airline flight because of over
booking? Did you know that
the Civil Aeronautics Board
regulations (49 C.F.R. Part
250) require the Airline to get
you on another flight scheduled
to arrive no more than 2 hours
after your original flight was
due (4 hours for International
flights). If f hey cannot do that,
they must immediately pay you
a penalty of up to $200.00,
depending on the value ofyour
i ticket,^ known as “denied
boarding compensation.” This
is generally given in the form
of a check, va»id for 30 days.
The Airline must also give you
a printed statement which des
cribes your rights.
This informatio- was taken
from The Consumer Gazette
For further info., write to: Av
iation Consumer Action Pro
ject, P.O.B. 19029, Washing
ton, D.C. 20036. . .
had been used jockstraps,” the
Elegant Emancipator thinks to
himseE “Then I’d really have
no trouble in finding them!”
He comes upon a strange
door, and opening it, bends in
and finds a long dark chute.
Suddenly, he hears a low, in
sidious laugh, and feels a sud
den forceful push from behind
him. Down, down thelongdark
chute, the Heroic Hummer
plummets toward a rapidly ap
proaching circle of white light
at the bottom. The Ever-Ready
Quintessential Queen uses the
famous peacock wedgies as a
brake, while allowing the full
chiffon skirt to billow out like
a parachute. The white mass
at the bottom still is approach
ing rapidly, when suddenly the
Heroic Hummer, with a dull
thud, feels himself being buried
in something very soft and
strangely odorous. It turns out
that he has been thrust down
the laundry chute. Stunned, he
finds himself buried to his neck
in a huge pile of dirty skivies.
“Mercy!” mutters the Heroic
Hummer, breathing deeply in
relief. “So this is Heaven! And .
I thought it was made or
clouds!”
Nect: Vol. 1, Episode 2, Part
3 of “The Big Jockstrap Con
spiracy!”
(Wonder Lez to the Rescue)
iVOUR LIFE
INSURANCE
Prepared by the American
S o c i e t y of Chartered Life
Unde rwriters, the national
society of life insurance,
pro fessio nals who have
earned the C.L. U. designation
by meeting high educational,
ethical and e x p er ience
requirements. ,
Q. My partner in spite of
his terrible manners and crazy
giggle, is a very good man in
our business. If he should die
I’d have to liquidate the busi
ness and take a job. Is there a
way I could take put a policy
on his life even though I’m
in no way related to him and
actually a couple of years
older than he is?
A. Sure. You don’t have to
be related to a person to be
his beneficiary. Indeed, some
people name a church or
school as beneficiary of their
insurance. Uncounted thou
sands of businessmen have
insurance to tide them over
in case a partner dies.
Also, there’s no age re
quirement for beneficiaries.
You don’t have to be younger.
In fact, many people take
out insurance to provide funds
for an elderly parent in case
the child dies first.
Hopefully you will never
have to collect on the iiisur-
ance. People who laugh a lot,
even if they have a crazy
giggle, seem to last longer
than people who don’t.
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