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/ / Dine c
/ u# 0n Th * i\
/ yu f Chattahoochee '
/ River...
(P[ I We Feature Trout Four Ways,
Steaks, Prime Ribs and Seafood
Specialities gf the House
Casual Dining In a Relaxed
Atmosphere.
\ Dinner From 5:30-11 p.m.
\ Mon.-Sat. y
\ 3399 Paces Ferry Road /
\ Atlanta 30339
436-7223 /A
WWl. S W;W.
L <»•- ■ 4*
employed in a non-professional
occupation. The college trained,
woman usually set her sight* ft* *
either a professional person or
someone well-placed in business.
Here, too, there were exceptions. !
recall one pious college girl who
earnestly declared that she often
prayed to be lucky enough to And a
husband who was religious and
scholarly rather than one who
could provide her with luxuries.
Some of my very sensitive clients
deplored the intense concern to
marry them off. Many students
decried their parents' persistent
inquiries regarding their social life
during visits home, in their letters
and during telephone calls which
clearly aroused the student's
anxiety. Some suffered from
feelings of guilt as well as of failure
for hot having found a mate.
The ultraorthodox usually had
their mate selected by their rabbi,
parents or by a shadchan
(matchmaker). Those with affluent
parents were able to find a
scholarly mate who would be
supported for a stipulated number
of yean during which be continued
his rabbinic studies. These studies
were pursued not to equip him for
a career but simply out of a love of
Tbrah. Eventually, he was either
absorbed in the father-in-law’s
business, or became a teacher in a
Yethiva or pu.»ued some skilled
craft, often‘connected with the
diamond business. If the girls'
parents were of modest economic
circumstances, the Yeshivot
provided the couple with stipends
of about fifty dollars a week, which,
the parents on both sides tried to
^fisen because of
secular knowle
vocational goals
grea
. .
Capacity to copa
Recently, there has been a sharp
rise in the divorce rate among some
members of the Hasidic
community. Inflation has been
devastating and aggravated by the
higher prices they pay for food
because of their scrupulous
observance of kashrut, or dietary
laws. Marital problems have also
and sophistication of
some of the women, many of
whoae mates had spent their entire
lives in study without having held a
job.
Nevertheless, during the mqny
yearn- that I counseled these
orthodox women I was struck by
the absence of severe emotional
problems among them. Almost all
exhibited a strong sense of
identity, purposefulness and
capacity to cope with their daily
problems which contrasted
substantially with many other non-
religious Jewish females of a
similar age, education and marital
status.
A Considerable number of the
more liberal orthodox females that
1 counseled had been to Israei
studying at such institutions as Bar
Ilan or Machon Gold. Some were
so impressed with this experience
that they planned to settle in Israel t
and a number married Israeli men.
Earnest converts
Several of my orthodox female
clients #erc converts to Judaism.
They had arrived at their decision
from their own v reading and
through attending services until
they had eventually gone through
the rite of conversion performed
by an orthodox rabbi. Their
conversation was sprinkled with
such terms as “Imyirzeh hashem"
(God willing) arid “Baruch
Has hem” (Thank God) which they
had undoubtedly acquired under
the dedicated tutelage of tbatr
mentors. They had come from
various parts of the country and
seemed very earnest about their
newly adopted fisith. While they
were befriended by the Jewish
group of college students which
whom they associated, they
betrayed signs of cultural shock
apparently from their predilection
to pursue the ultra-othodox way of
life. They were both baffled lend
disappointed'with non-observant
J^ws. Interestingly, their
Difficult situations
*1 evT " 1 ■' • jb • • •
In some ways, the moat difficult
problepi socially was posed by the
handful of orthodox black girls.
They all came from the Negto-
Jewish community of metro
politan New York. They were
extremely well-mannered and
diligent students. They acknow
ledged that while some of their
classmates had invited them to
their homes for Shabbat, they bad
not dated their brothers of other
white Jews. They did not speak
blithely about this and unlike many
of their classmates they seemed
unpreoccupied with the subject of
marriage. Although from the view
of Halacha there is no objection to
marrying a black Jewess, the social
barrier remains unresolved for
many orthodox as well as for other
Jews.
Another unique client was the
female baalah leshuva (penitent)
who after almost no contact with
Jewish life and often after much
waywardness became a pious
Jewess. Most were referred by the
Hasidic group known as the
Lubavitcher, under whose
influence they had come. They -
were mainly college dropouts from
middle class and even affluent
families. Most had been through
various periods of psychotherapy,
had joined various communes,
taken hard drugt, and had lived
but ^mi*j| f yi n | liwfjii
it wag usually a chance
withe representative of
ovenmrt that
hadvkcd them I# halt their
previously aimless and self
destructive lives and to become
ultraorthodox Jews. After initial
instruction, they lived- in homes
provided by the movement where
they received addition-al
instruction in Judaism and the
tenets of Hasidism. Although they
came for vocational counseling,
they were mainly interested in
supporting themselves until such
time as an appropriate marriage
would be arranged for them with
the blessing of tbeir rebbe.
Untapped potential
Our Jewish woriten represent an
enormous, untapped potential for
creative Jewish living. Regret
tably, many of our young women
have been seduced by vacuous
cults, and hollow hedonistic
philosophies. If our synagogues
and community centers were to
launch a bold, innovative
educational and social program
maqy aimless and unhappy women
might be salvaged to enrich their
own lives and to contribute to the
advancement of Jewish life.
The Talmud declares that it was
by virtue of the Jcwieh woman that
the Jews were freed from Egypt,
adding that when the men had
become discouraged theiy wives
kept alive their hopes of eventually
gaining their freedom. If Jewish
life in America it to enjoy a
renaissance, it will be spurred.by
Jewish'
J
For those
who appreciate
the difference
Sifkim
frnott party accomodations
for troops from 20 to 500.
Courtesy Transportation available
from Downtown by Kesentaiiab.
BERNIE FRIEDRICH RICE
Whenever You Think Wheels...
Gall Bernie or Al
at .
1744 Scott Blvct. % Decatur, Ga.
^ 633-9191 lease or buy
ANY MODE!. LOWEST POSSIBLE PRICE
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PLUS: The Personal Service arid know-how of two
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9 THE SOUTHERN ISRAELITE January 4, !**•