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rHE LAGRANGE REPORTER.. *
"Can yon tell me why so many mu-
Mcians affect long hair?”
I suppose ft la on account of tha
natural affinity of keys for locks.”—
Baltimore American.
Beware the fleroe welsh rabbit, men.
Avoid him with a frown.
For he does all Ms fighting when
lou think you have Htm down.
“Cincinnati Enquirer.
"Your son says his professor Is a
Wery strict disciplinarian, Mrs. Nnrlch."
“He must have been Joking. The
allege Is nonsectarian, you know.”—
Buffalo Express.
More money doe* not mean the same
To both the sexea. I declare.
“® re *° the man means more to eatj
More to the woman, more to wear!
• *- , „ —Puck.
Mrs. Snapp (With newspaper)—Here’s
an article which says that meat causes
bad temper.
Shapp—It certainly does the way you
cook It—Philadelphia Ledger.
There isn’t much tn writing poetry.
Big pay for clever rlmlny la a myth.
A very lucky bard. Indeed. Is he
Whose ode to Keats pays what he owed
to Smith.
—Baltimore American.
“Does yonr wife open all the mall
that comes to the house?”
"Everything except the bills, and
■he’s afraid to see what’q Inside them.”
—Detroit Free Press.
No, Johnnie, we do not think there
will be a circus this year.
The editor must hc.ve his Joke-
Let's sco how this wild haxard pleases;
We always think an actor’s broku
Because he's so often seen In pleoea.
—Atlanta Constltutlf.
We admire the doughty air man
In hia aeroplane of silk.
He enn skim the skies of azure.
But he cannot skim the milk.
—Spokane Spokesman-Review.
“What Is (he first thing needed In an
aviation enterprise ?"
"1 should say the nlaln start in tlis
flying business is an angel."—Baltimore
American.
Oh. take away the breakfast bin
And heed this calculation:
To boll an egg may mean to klll
A poultry generation!
—Washington Star.
Special War Offer to Our Readers ~
- We have just secured the rights to offer the
NEW WAR BOOK
“EUROPEAN WAR AT A GLANCE”
AND a YEAR’S SUBSCRIPTION T O WOMANS WORLD AND THE LAGRANGE REPORTER
All Three For SI-25
\V AR, with its hideous loss of life and property, teeming graveyards, orphaned children, famine,
plague and untold human suffering, coming from the clear sky of peace, is the subject of world-wide
comment and wonder. K
DO YOU KNOW
• is being
Woman’s World has more subscrib
ers than any other magazine publish
ed, over two million a month. Its ar
ticles, its stories, its illustrations, are
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magazine to be compared with any
home magazine in the country, re
gardless of price, without fear of con
tradiction of any claims we make for
it. Its stories are by authors known
the world over.
Why the war
fought?
What started it?
Why Austria declared war?
Why Russia interfered?
Why Germany joined with
Austria?
' i Why France and England
aided Russia?
Why Belgium was made the
“goat?"
The Truth About
The reasons behind the war?
The causes of international
hatred ?
The history of the conflict
ing nations ?
The location of navies, troops
and fortifications?
The strength of the Powers?
The size of their armies and
navies ?
The different religions?
The percentage of illiteracy?
This World’s War?
Its Cost to Humanity; The
■Issues at Stake; America's
Untold Opportunity; Proph
ecy of Experts on the Out
come; Its Effect on the Fu
ture; The Probable Results.
’ THE WAR OF KINGS'’
; ' t '*■ v .1
The
European
WAR ]
A BOOK OF- FACTS." , ' ]
Tells the complete history of
all the Powers of Europe in a
nutshell—gives statistics of the
wealth, war strength, military
and naval, of the European
countries, at a glance.
This publication will post
you fully on a subject which is
the gravest menace in all his
tory, and which will probably
change the map of the entire
world.
Take advantage of this wonderful offer and thoroughly ac
quaint yourself with the full story of the WAR and its in
fluence on American industries, crops and future opportunities.
This offer will be good fo r a short time only, and in order to
make sure of receiving a copy of this new book on the World’s
War before the supply is exhausted you must act now. Fill
out the coupon today, GET this book on the WAR, together
with a year’s subscription to WOMAN’S WORLD and the LA
GRANGE REPORTER, all three at special price of $1.25
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EUROPEAN WAR AT A
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AUTO TIRES AND SUPPLIES
ARE SOLD HERE
We handle the Famous Fisk Tires and Inner
Tubes, known over the world as Standard Goods
AUTO ACCESSORIES OF ALL KINDS
Oils, Greases and Gasolines. The kind that gives
satisfaction. Your automobile needs,large or small
may be supplied here. FREE Air Station—Use it
HUDSON HARDWARE CO.
12 MAIN STREE1
TELEPHONE NO. 204
Optimism and
Opportunity
As we said in our recent advertise
ment, “it is very good these days to
be an American."
During the month our country hus
encountered a trying experience in
which our finances, our foreign trade,
and even our domestic business have
been disturbed by the sudden and
tremendous wars in our ancestral
countries.
Yet, we are coming out of it well.
The president, with his cabinet and
the congress, and the co-operation of
bankers and business "men called to
Washington for the purpose, have
promptly and nobly met the emer
gency by sensible rulings and wise
laws, which will largely, free our in
dustries and commerce from restrain.
They have arranged for the is
suance of emergency currency,
through amendment of the Aldrich-
Vreeland Law, under which national
banks can obtain all the currency
needed for legitimate business.
They have organized the Federal
Reserve Board which will insure the
opening of the twelve new Federal
Reserve Banks inside of sixty days,
thus giving ample banking facilities
for business to every section of our
country.
They have amended the ship regis
try laws so that American capital
will buy foreign ships, which togeth
er with the large number of ships
already owned by Americans, will fly
the flag of the United States and fur
nish ample carrying capacity for our
foreign trade.
They have opened the Panama
Canal, and thus provided shorter
routes for our commerce with South
America, Australia, and the Far
East. •
They have under consideration a
plan of financing the surplus cotton
crop so that our Southern planters
will be enabled to hold their cotton
until normal markets are restored.
The corporation, with its 62 years
of business experience, its thousands
of employees and its millions of capi
tal invested—appreciates the patri
otic work that has been done and the
opportunities thereby afforded.
Speaking from our experience and
immediate forecast of possibilities,
we feel cheerful and optimistic over
the outlook for profitable business
and steady employment of labor,
with inereasiilg developments of for
eign trade in neutral countries.
America is today the clearing
house of the world.
The great nations of the earth are
depending upon the integrity of her
friendship—the safety and saneness
of her diplomacy—the extensiveness
of her trade, and the soundness of her
finance.
It is a time for Americans to show
their optimism, their patriotism, and
their aggressive earnestness.
The foundations of our national
prosperity have been laid too deep
and too strong to be seriously dis
turbed, even by so great a catastrophe
as the war of all Europe.
We regret deeply and sincerely that
the war must be—yet, we are in no
wise, to blame, and are happily far
removed from the theatre of its ac
tivities.
Friendship we feel for all—and to
ward all we must remain in both
thought and action entirely neutral.
Our duty to ourselves and our
moral obligation to the rest of the
world compel us Americans to be up
and doing; to maintain a cheerful and
hopeful spirit, to operate our indus
tries and enterprises, to pay our bills
as usual, and to conduct our affairs
generally on conservative but en
thusiastic lines.
NOTE—The above advertisement
was. inserted in leading papers
througout the nation a few days ago
by one of the largest and most suc
cessful American automobile and
wagon manufacturing concerns. The
advertisement is a powerful tribute
to the sagacity of the President-and
Congress, and tells its own story.
“ON THE JOB.”
President Wilson did not submerge
the personal note in his letter an
nouncing his intention of remaining
on the job as head of the nation, and,
therefore, of taking no active part in
partisan political contests. But that
is of small consequence. We agree
with the president that he is needed
now as president.—Chicago Tribune
(Bull Moose).
GREEN GROW THE RASHES, O!
There’s naught but cure ou ev
ery ban',
In every hour that passes.
Oh, what sigulfies the life of
man,
An’ ’twere na’ for the lasses, O!
CHORUS.
Green grow the rashes, O!
Green grow the rashes, O!
The sweetest hours that ere I
spent.
Were spsnt among the lasses, Ot
The worldly race may riches
chase,
An’ riches still may fly them,
O, an* though at last they catch
them fast,
Their hearts can ne'er enjoy
them, O!
Gie me a cantte hour at e’en,
My arms a boat my dearie,
O, an’ wardly cares and wardly
men
May a’ gae tapes! teerie, O!
And you sae douce, wha sneer
at this,
Ye’re naught but senseless asses.
Oh, the wisest man the world
e’er saw,
He dearly lo'ed the lasses, 01
-r-r
FRIDAY MORNING, OCT, 9, 1914.
SHOWING THE FARMER “HOW”
B ditar Atlanta Constitution,
Atlanta, (la.
Rditor Constitution: During the past
three months I have traveled over llir
idates of South Carolina and Georgia
Interviewing mauy of the best and most
prominent farmers. I find that they
ars hauling their cotton .from the gins
to their homes and there storing aame—
something I never saw before. This
condition Is brought shout on account
of the extremely low price of cotton,
attributed mainly because of the wur In
Europe and to a lesser extent by rea
son of a “bumper” crop.
Theso farmers seem Interested and
express a willingness to produce other
commodities. All of the larger railway
systems In this part of the country, and,
In fact, throughout the south, have com
petent and efficient Industrial represen
tatives In the field assisting and show-
l«$ tha farmers "how” to diversify their
crops and put them on a better pay
ing basis.
In south Georgia (Colquitt countv) I
visited some clover and alfalfa Reids
as lltie aa anyone would wish to see
planted under the direction of one or
the Industrial agents referred to above.
Many of the farmers ore beginning to
realise that there is an unlimited and
never-ending market for fresh meuts,
and are branching out into cattle and
liog raising. Slaughter pens and packing
houses have beftu established at conven
ient centers. The etty council of At
lanta has recently adopted an ordinance
permitting the shipment of fresh meats
from Georgia points into Atlanta, under
eertaln restrictions which can, without
Inconvenience, lie compiled with by the
farmers and producers. The people of
Savannah and that vicinity have, for
some time, benefited by a similar law.
Ollier cities In Georgia, where city laws
prohibit the bringing in of fresh meat
shipments will no doubt, see the wis
dom of adopting similar modifications
whereby the farmer may be permitted
to market such products In the nearest
city, thus minimizing transportation
cost.
Georgia abounds in rich and fertile
soil, from the foot of the Blue Ridge
mountains to the Atlantic const. It
has been successfully demonstrated that
potatoes, tomatoes, lettuce, asparagus,
eggplant, beans, hny, corn, sugarcane,
apples, peaches, pears, pecans, etc. ns
fine os ever grew can be produced not
only in Georgia but In tne Carollnas,
Florida and Alabama. For examplei
Aa a result of Industrial work around
.Cornelia, Mount Airy and Tallulah
Park, during the summer approximate
ly 80,000 erates of beans, tomatoes,cu
cumbers and potatoes were grown and
shipped during the months of August
ana September, and shipments will
continue until frost
Young ladles throughout the country
are being taught how to can fruits and
vegetables and Importuned to let noth
ing go to waste. Profitable markets
ean be found for home made preserves,
canned fruits, and, In fact everything
produced or grown on the farm.
Bseatm the Individual farmer cannot
afford expensive storage facilities, he
mast dispose of the greater part of Ills
crop when It matures, either to people
prepared to hold It or direct to the
consumer. The Southern Express com
pany's traffic deportment will nave ready
for general distribution In a week or
ten days pamphlets containing the
tames and addresses o* commission men
engaged In the handling of fruits, vege
tables, etc.; likewise, information as to
L.e producers of various commodities t
oyster and fish shippers, etc., and It
hi the •otnpany’s expectation to revise
these lists from time to time, M feet
a* we develop the names of producers
and camramers—the object being to put
the peodaeer hi teach with markets
where he east profitably dispose of what
he he* to selL For the mm who has aa
oooastoml coop of ckldreas or crate of
eggs to ship It will be our pleasure and
“One of the moat Inspiring develop*
ments of the prevalent cotton crisis hi
the south Is the manner iti which south
ern ruilrnnds and general transporter-
tlon agencies are multiplying agencies
already active, te the end of encourag
ing tlie farmer to diversify, to reduca
eolton acreage and, in larger terms to
aid the south In finding a way out of
the problem that confronts it. An Il
lustration Is found in a communication-
published elsewhere, from I. M. Cox,
industrial agent of the Southern Ex
press company. To Mr. Cox’s prop*,
ganda Is traceable the growth and ship
ment, now proceeding, of 80,000 crate*
of beans, tomatoes, cucumbers and po
tatoes from that rich section of Geor
gia around Cornelia, Mount Airy and
Tallulah Park. The Southern Express
company is helping the growers find •
market for all tills truck. This Is con
structive work of the most practical'
type. It Is upon such efforts, founded
primarily upon reduction of cotton
acreage, that the state and the south
must depend for a solution of the un-
. preeedented difficulties of this year and
next year.
Mr Cox further shows what The
Constitution has always contended, and
that is that the United States parcel
post and 'he express companies would
co-operate in stimulating relations be
tween producer and consumer. Fur
nishing reciprocal lists to these two
classes new and profitable markets
are being opened up to the farmers of
the southern states.
Every Important railroad In the
southern states Is engaged in work along
similar lines, and the European war
has caused them to Intensify their ef
forts. The Atlanta, Birmingham and
Atlantic is not one of the largest car
riers in' the south, but it Is and has been
one of the most active, proportionately.
In this direction. Its campaign calling
attentloln to the possibilities of the soil
of Its territory, and Its practical de
monstrations to the farmers along Its
lines, is having telling effect. In a
communication published recently in
The Constitution W. R. Tucker, farm
ers’ co-operative agent of this system,
pointed out the results being accom
plished along these lines. The Seaboard
Air Line is another active factor la
this field. It Is at present Impressing
upon the south and the nation that the
south has a farming season varying
from 200 to 848 days out of the year,
and a soil just as versatile. The South
ern the Coast Line and the L. & N~
with the Central of Georgia, are like
wise hammering away. The vail roads,
the Southern Express company and
other agencies are setting to the south
an example In eo-oprratien and re
source In crisis as effectual aa it Is In
spiring.”—Editorial in Constitution.
purpose to provide htm the names at
retail dealers or commission men who
will pay the market price for such
goods.
A neat and attractively put-up pack
age will seH much more readily and afi
a better price than on* caeelaaUy pack
ed, even though it contains better pro
duce.
Wthln the last week or ten days 1
have in company with D. I- Campbell
and W. R. Tucker, industrial agents for
the Atlanta Birmingham and Atlaadto
railroad, called upon forty or fifty fean*-
era around Moultrie and FMsgeiuld,
Ga., who were found to be enthusiast!*
over the possible benefits to be derived
from the diversification of craps. Ih
addition to rayres eating the A. B. A A-.
railroad, Mess**, Campbell and TtofeJ
age also oonmotaa with tho UMfet
State* bureau of plant industry aiiS
Georgia fkbsto fikdluev at Agfltosifcmm
and ih dsf«( uunt and far-rsWflS
lag Wtok in
ImfestrUI Agent fieathara BupSu atm>
peay, Athruts^ Ou.
ANTI-TUBERCULOSIS ARMIES
MOBILIZE FOR FALL CAM
PAIGN.
Sectional Conferences to be Held in
Bangor, Philadelphia, Atlanta,
and St. Louis During Oct.
and Nov.
New York, Oct. 1.—Four Sectional
Conferences on tuberculosis wiii be
held in various parts dt the country
during the months of October and No
vember under the direction of The
National Association for the Study
and prevention of tuberculosis, ac
cording to an announcement from the
headquarters of that organization to
day.
These Conferences, designed to sti
mulate the war against tuberculosis
in the sections which they serve, will
be held in St. Louis, Mo., on October
6, 7 and 8; in Philadelphia, Pa., on
October 18; in Bangor, Me., on Oct
ober 22nd; and in Atlanta Gia., dur
ing the last week in November.
Prominent anti-tuberculosis workers
from all parts of the country will ad
dress the various conferences. Among
the principal subjects to be discussed
at all the conferences are The Red
Cross Seal campaign; the advantages
of local hospitals for the care of con
sumptives; the home treatment of the
tuberculous; and legislative problems.
In the official announcement re
lative to these conferences, Dr; Char
les J. Hatfield, executive secretary of
the National Association says; “These
four conferences are in fact the mobi
lization of those who are engaged in
the war against tuberculosis for the
coming fall winter campaign which
we are planning to wage against this
disease. In almost every state of the
Union, active movements against
tuberculosis will be forwarded during
the next six months. We hope at
these conferences to discuss ways and
means and to secure the support and
enthusiasm which will enable us to
attack our individual problems more
successfully than we could do other
wise.” ’
CARD OF THANKS.
We sincerely thank our friends and
neighbors and faithful physician, Dr.
R. W. Bryant for their kindness dur
ing the iilness, and help and sym
pathy at the time of the death of
our dear brother Willie.
MR. AND MRS. M. L. GLENN.
MISS EMMIE GLENN.
His young stenographer was fair.
He started a flirtation.
His wife got wise to It, a ad there
Will be no mediation.
—Chicago Record-HcraML
Patience—I understand Mr. Styles
has given bis wife a string of pearls.
Patrice—Well, he was determined to
have some sort of a string on her.—■
Yonkers Statesman.
Old Mrs. Wiggins la a crank;
She went Into the yard
And tried to catch soft water when j
She saw it raining hard.
—Philadelphia Ledger. ’
“What good children she has I”
“Yes, Indeed. She never has to neg
lect her card club to look after them.**
—Detroit Free Press.
The savage said: “I really find
Mine Is a gloomy lot. „
They loot me lr I’m good and kind
And shoot mo if I’m not.” I
—Washington Star. ’
Creditor—You couldn’t go around to
your fine automobile If you had paid
your debts. Debtor—That’s sot I’m
glad you look at it In the same light
that I do.—Boston, Transcript.
To publish all the things he knew 1
A hundred volumes took, ' ,k
And yet he did not know enough
To All a pocketbook.
-Puck.
First Working Girt—Say, Marne, ,1
heard au awful sad thing this morning.
Second Working Girl (wearily)—8m
did 1—the alarm clock.—life.
Why Is It that the divers bricks
And bullets that meander ,
Prom flgMs and Hots always hit >’
tha innocent bystander!
. . 1 ' ' -Junto*.
"Why on earth dent tm
Mn Gebto.
“Became their wives won't gtdfl
stirring them ujk” retorted Mb Gfthht
—Cincinnati Enqntrer.
P
Ntfir, pteam aooept tills ttttto
1 tape yoar love ■twin wfe,
n send you something worth®*** wfe*
My looked tor atop ootneo tm.
—Yonkers Statesman.