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THE SEMI-WEEKLY SUMTER REPUBLICAN.
ESTABLISHED IN 1854,
By CHAS. W. HANCOCK. (
VOL. 18.
The Sumter Republican.
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Charles F. Crisp,
*1 Homey at Law ,
AMERICUS, GA.
declGtf
B. P. HOLLIS
til tor new at Law .
AMERICUS, GA.
Office, Forsyth Street, in National Bank
building. dec2ot£
~E. G SIMMONS,
*lt tor new at Late ,
AMERICUS GA.,
Office in Hawkins’ building, south side of
Lamar Street, in the ohl office of Fort*
Simmons. jaiditf
J. .1. ANWI.EY,
ATTORNEY AT LAW
AND SOUUTOIt IS EQHTf.
Office on Public SquAUE, Ovkk Gyles’
Clothing Stoke, Americcs, Ga.
After a brief respite I return again to the
practice of law. As in the past it will be
my earnest purpose to represent my clients
faithfully and look to their interests. The
commercial practice will receive close atten
tion and remittances promptly made. The
Equity practice, and cases involving titles of
land and real estate are my favorites. Will
practice in the Courts of Southwest Georgia,
the Supreme Court and the United States
Courts. Thankful to my friends for their
patronage. Fees moderate. novlitf
c A 1? d7
I offer my professional services again to tlic
good people of Americus. After thirty years’
of medical service, I have found it difficult
to withdraw entirely. Office next door to
Dr. Eldridge’s drugstore, on the Square
janlTtf It. C. BLACK, M. D.
DR. BACLEY’s
INDIAN VKGETABIE LIVER AND
KIDNEY PILLS.
For sale by ail Druggists in Americus.
Price 25cents per box. Jan26wly
Dr.^HOLLOWAY,
DsntssT,
Americus. - - G-eorgin
Treatssuccessfully all diseasesof the Den
tal organs. Fills teeth by the improved
method, and inserts artificial teetli on the
best niaterial known to the profession.
tSTOFFICE over Davenport and Son’s
Drug Store. marltt
M. H. O’DANIEL, M. D
A meric us, (Jn.
Office and Residence, No. 21 Barlow
House.
All calls promptly attended, day or night.
Calls left at Eidridge’s Drug Store.
feb7-3m
Dr J. F. Stapleton
Offers his professional services to the people
of Americus and surrounding couutry. He
will practice medicine, surgery, obsjetrics,
and allother matters pertaining to his pro
fession. A successful experience in the past
will guarantee to him success. Calls left at
the residence of Mrs. Mary Jossey, at Dr.
Eldrldge's Drug Store, and at the office of
Drs. Head & Black, will receive prompt
attention. janl9-Dm
Livery and Sale Stalls:!
Besides Horses, we have the WEBSTER
WAGON, LANDIS BUGGIES. J. T.
BARNES’ ROAD CARTS, KENTUCKY
MULES, here and en route. To epitomize,
Horses, Mules, Wagons, Buggies, Carts,
and Harness to suit ail tastes and Jndge
meuts, Fine styles, substantial goods at ex
ceedingly LOW FIGURES. The timescon
sidered in all our dealings. Call and see us.
N. G. & J K. PRINCE,
Cotton Ave. and West End Jefferson St.
jan3tf Americus, Ga.
Real Estate for Sale.
EASY TERMS; 150 YARDS
'I p t/fJU. from business portion of
■ cty; a neat and well arranged four-room
dwelling, with cook room attached; good
servant’s house on place; splendid well of
water; beautiful flower yard; rich garden
spot, and several choice fruit trees in bear
-1 BASH FOR 150 ACRES FIVE
J miles west of Americus; good
Improvements; 100 acres in cultivation; bal
ance original forest; plenty of water on
place; splendid location for fish pond.
CASH WILL BUY 200 ACRES
tp.f7 V.' V/ of good land three miles from
Smithvllle; 150 acres cleared; balance well
timbered; good settlement and good water
on place.
HARDY & TOMMEY.
Yeb24-tf Real Estate Agents
DARBYS
PROPHYLACTIC
FLUID.
A Household Article for Universal
Family Use.
For Scarlet and
B Eradiratefl ITyphoidl Typhoid levers *
■ eradicates gj Diphtheria, Sall-
I MALAEIA, | vation ’ Ulcerated
gj Sore Throat, Small
■■BHHBHfIHBHH Measles, and
all Contagious Diseases. Persons waiting on
the Sick should use it freely. Scarlet Fever lias
never been known to spread where the Fluid was
used. Yellow Fever has been cured with it after
black vomit had taken place. The worst
cases of Diphtheria yield to it.
Feveredand Slek Per- SMALL-POX
sons refreshed and and
Bed Sores prevent- PITTING of Small
ed by bathing with I> o x PREVENTED
Darbys Fluid. A , r c
Impure Air made .. A member of my fam
harralcss and purified, ,^’ as ta J ccn . w,dl
For Sore Throat it is a ZP.J'P o .*' * ” sed lbe
sure cure Fluid; the patient was
Contagion destroyed. n P I delirious, was not
For Frosted Feet, P‘ tl ? d - and Y a ? about
Chilblains, Piles, house again in three
Chaflngs, etc. , w “ ks > an T d others
Rheumatism cured. * lad lt- £ ARK “
Soft White Complex- IKSON Philadelphia.
ions secured by its use. EBBSHSEESHHHR
Ship Fever prevented. B
T £i p canS SS: I diphtheria
it can’t be surpassed. B , - ■
Catarrh relieved and C ISYSIItOCL B
cured.
Erysipelas cured. fBBIBBBI^BBHI
S. U u r^L iCVC ?^ Stantly - The Physicians here
use Darb > ,s fluid very
Dysentery cui-cd. successfully in the treat-
Wounds healed rapidly. ment of Diphtheria.
A * 1 A. Stollrnwekck,
An Antidote for Animal Greensboro, Ala.
or Vegetable Poisons,
Stings, etc. Tetter dried up.
I used the Fluid during Cholera prevented,
our present affliction with Ulcers purified and
Scarlet Fever with de- healed,
cided advantage. It is In cases of Death it
indispensable to the sick- should be used about
room. Wm. F. Sand- the corpse —it will
ford, Eyrie Ala. unpleas-
The eminent Phy
i Scarlet Fever I!
H Sj i York, says: “I am
B Cured B conv * nced Prof. Darbys
9 : Prophylactic Fluid is a
bB 1 vaduab ‘ e disinfectant."
Vanderbilt University, Nashville, Tcnn.
I testify to the most excellent qualities of Prof.
Darbys Prophylactic Fluid. Asa disinfectant and
detergent it is both theoretically and practically
superior to any preparation with which lain ac
quainted.—N. T. Lupton, Prof. Chemistry.
Darbys Fluid is Recommended by
Hon. Alexander H. Stephens, of Georgia •
Rev. Chas. F. Deems, D.D., Church of the
Strangers, N. Y.;
Jos. LeContk, Columbia, Prof.,University,S.C.
Rev. A. J. Rattle, Prof., Mercer University;
Rev. Geo. F. Pierce, Bishop M. E. Church.
TO EVERY HOME.
Perfectly harmless. Used internally or
externally for Man or Beast.
The Fluid has been thoroughly tested, and we
have abundant evidence that it has done everything
here claimed. For fuller information get of you*
Druggist a pamphlet or send to the proprietors,
J. If. ZEILIN & CO..
Manufacturing Chemists, PHILADELPHIA.
TO TIP'S
PILLS
A DISORDERED LIVER
IS THE BANE
of the present generation. It Is for the
<sure of~ this disease and its attendants,
SICK-HEADACHE, BILIOUSNESS, DYS
PEPSIA, CONSTIPATION, FILES, eto., that
TOTT'S FILLS have gained a world-wide
reputation. No Beiriody haa ever been
discovered that acta go ghntly on tha
digestive organs, giving them vigor to as
similate food. Asa natural result, the
Nervous System is Braced, the Muscles
are Developed, and the Body Robust.
OMUa and Fowor,
E. RIVAL, a Planter at Dayou Sara, La., says
My plantation la In a malarial district. For
several years I could not mako half a crop on
account of bilious diseases and chills. I was
nearly discouraged when I began the use of
TUTT’S PILLS. Tho result was marvelous:
my laborers aocn became hearty and robust,
and I have had no further trouble.
They relieve tho engorged Elver, clcnune
the Blood from poisouoas humon, and
cause Hie bowels to met natnrally, with
out which no one can feel well.
Try this remedy fairly, and yon will gain
a healthy Digest lon, Vigorous Body. Pure
Blood, String Nerves, and a Sound Liver.
Price, 25Cents. OfQctf, 35 Murray St., N. Y*
TUn’S HAIR DYE.
Gray Hair or Wittskkrs changed to a Glossy
Black by n single application of this Dye. It
Imparts a natural color, and acts Instantaneously.
Sold by Druggists, or sent by express on receipt
of One Dollar.
Office, 8B Murray Street, New York.
(Ur. TUTT*S MANUAL of
Information and Useful Receipts I
veill be mailed FREE on application. /
HOSTETrER^
&lfTEftS
Invalids who are recovering vital stamina,
declare in grateful term * their appreciation
of the merits as a tonic of Hostctter’s Stom
ach Hitters. None only does it impart
strength to the weak, but also corrects an
irregular acid state of tho stomach, makes
the bowels act at proper intervals, gives ease
to those who suffer from rheumatic and kid
ney troubles, and conquers as well as pre
vents fever and ague.
For sale by all Druggists and Dealers
generally.
FOTTTZ’S
HORSE AND CATTLE POWDERS
No Hems* will die of Coitc. nor. or Lvkq Fx
vx*. If Fontz’s Powders are used in time.
Foutz’s Powders will cure and prevent HooCihilera.
Foutz’s Powders will prevent Gaper in Fowls.
Foutz’s Powders will increase the quantity of milk
and cream twenty per cent., and nmke the butter firm
and sweet.
Foutt's Powders will cure or prevent almost etyby
Diseasb to which Horses and < utile are subject-
Foutz’s Pownrns will give Satisfaction. I
Bold everywhere.
DAVID F. rOTJTZ. Proprister, |
BALTIMORE* US.
INDEPENDENT IN POLITICK, AND DEVOTED TO NEWS, LITERATURE, SCIENCE AND GENERAL PROGRESS.
AMERICUS, GEORGIA, WEDNESDAY, MARCH 21, 1883.
w vau's
THE CAPTAIN’S MESSAGE.
“It’s perfectly ridiculous,” said
Miss Daffodil, “for you girls to be
thinking ol’ getting married all the
time. 1 never do. Now just look
how this bias fold is puckered, and the
fringe sewed on all up and down, like
the waves of the sea. If you young
women weren’t cackling and chatting
all the time these things wouldn’t
happen. Valentine’s day, indeed!
Who was that talking about St. Val
entine’s day? And what is St. Valen
tine’s day to you working girls, I’d
like to know? It’s only ladies that
have time to think of such things.”
Miss Deoorah Daffodil, a somewhat
faded maiden of live and thirty irost
bitten autumns, was the Burnville
dress maker, and the lour girls in her
dingy hack parlor were her assistants,
whom she paid as little and scoled as
much as possible.
“But, Miss Daffodil,” reasoned
Amabel Archer, a rosy, dark browned,
little brunett, with limpid brown eyes,
and a rich crimson flush on her cheek,
why shouldn’t we talk about St. Val
eniiuc’n day? It’s always a lucky
day in our family. Uncle Job sent
mamuia a check for twenty dollars a
year ago, St. Valentine’s day; and two
years ago, on that very anniversary,
my sister Effie met the man that she
afterward married. And who knows
what dawn of good fortune it may
bring to me?”
“Married!” shriily repeated Miss
Daffodil, tapping her thimble-finger on
the table. “There it is again! 1 be
lieve you girls think of nothing else.”
“Well,” said Amabel, thoughtfully,
“it does mean a good deal in a girl’s
life. It 1 supposed that I had g>t to
.-it hero and sew always—”
“1 only hope that no worse lot will
ever befall you,” said Miss Daffodil,
sourly. “But I never knew a gi.il who
was always curling Iter hair and think
ing of her complexion who came to any
good end.”
Amabel crimsoned.
“Do you mean me, Miss Daffodil?”
she said.
The spinster tossed her head.
“Them as the cap fits, let ’em wear
it” said site. “And I’ll trouble you
all, young women, to leave off chatter
ing silly, superstitious nonsense about
heathenish old saints that never exis
ted at all—”
At this there was a general outcry.
Not even from the lips of their vinegar
tongned employer would the girls
listen to any derogation of the darling
patron saint of girlhood—the good
saint to whom all maidens render lov
ing homage—St. Valentine!
“Well, if he did exist, it was a long
time ago,” said Miss Daffodil; “and
you’ve none of you nothing to do with
him now. x\nd Miss Ghicberiug’s
bridal outfit is to be packed on Monday,
and here it isn’t half finished. What’s
that, Amabel Archer? You want to
get away early this evening? You’re
going for a moonlight sleighride with
Captain Juniper? Let me tell you,
Miss, that you will do nothing of the
kind,” said Miss Daffodil, speaking
with added rancor. “It isn’t decent or
proper fur a young girl like you to go
cutter-riding around the country with
every gentleman in town.”
“You went iicling with Captain Ju
niper yourself last week, Miss Daffo
dil,” said Amabel, all else forgotten
in her rising indignation.
“That’s quite a different thing,”
said the dressmaker, simpering. “Cap
tain Juniper and 1 are very particular
friends'”
“Oh, Miss Daffodil!” cried out Bar
bara Dayton. “You’re not engaged
to him? Oh, do tell us!”
“Barbara, will you attend to your
work?” said Miss Daffodil. “Though
all the same, if such reports do get
abroad, I consider it my duty neither
to deny nor confirm them.”
But Miss Daffodil did not consider
it her duty to tell the girls that she
had run half a dozen yards through
the deep snow after Captain Juniper’s
cutter to ask him “if he would just as
lief as not take her as far as tho vil
lage, to match some lapez-lazuli but
tons for Mrs. Gregg’s dress;” and that
the gallant captain wastoo chivalrous
to refuse to aid a lady in distress.
And thereupon Miss Deborah Daffo
dil had based great hopes.
“He’s a few years younger than I
am, to be sure,” said she; “but if ever
devotion was expressed in a human
eye, it was in his when he handed me
out the card of buttons that I wanted
to match, and told me to be careful not
to slip down on tho frosted curbstone.
And when I invited him to call he
thanked me and said ho should be
very happy.. And I don’t see how any
man could have said more than that!”
8o that when she heard of Amabel
Archer’s invitation a very natural
jealousy stirred her heart.
“No, Miss Archer,” she said firmly;
“I have promised Miss Watterson that
site shall have her plum-colored silk
to-morrow morning, and not one of the
thirteen bias flounces are sewed on yet,
and the waist trimming has to be
shirred in three diagonal stripes and
tho skirt set on.”
“Can’t Barbara Dayton finibh it?”
said Amabel, with wistful eyes "And
I’ll do as much for her some lime.”
“I’ll do it,” saiil cheerful Barbara.
• I’d as soon stay after hours as not.”
“Excuse me,” said the dressmaker,
w'ith awful stiffness of demeanor, “hut
I prefer to manage my business lor my
self. Amabel Archer must finish the
dresß as she has begun it. Two or
three different hands on a job are sure
to ruin it, aud I don’t desire ta lose
Miss Watterson’B custom.”
“But,” cried Amabel, piteously, “I
promised Captain Juniper—l must
go!” •
“If you go,” said Miss Daffodil,
“you don’t come back into my employ
ment again.”
And poor Amabel Archer thought
of her invalid mother and the three
apple-cheeked little sisters who were
clothed and kept at school by her toil,
and dared not remonstrate further.
“But I shall hear the sleigh-beels,”
she comforted herself; “and I can just
run out a moment and beg him to be
lieve that it was hot my fault.”
And she sat herself down by the
window, after the other hands were
gone—she was the only one who
boarded with Miss Daffodil—to sew,
and sigh, and listen.
But sho heard no silver-chiming
sleigh-bells. How should she, when
Miss Daffodil had quietly crept down
the lane and intercepted the captain’s
gay little equipage just where the old
finger-post raised its skeleton form in
to the air?
“Oh,” said the Captain, a frank,
handsome young fellow, with laughing
blue eyes aud a golden heard, “is it
you, Miss Daffodil? I thought per
haps—”
“Yes, it’s me,” said Miss Daffodil,
sweetly. “I just came to tell you that
Miss Archer is very soiry, but she
can’t go cutter-riding with you this
evening. She’s got a bad/sore throat.
Besides, she’s dreadful nurried with
her work.”
Captain Juniper’s countenance fell,
lie played nncousciously with the han
dle of his whip, while the horse pawed
the ground and flecked h : s jetty
breast with specks of foam, all impa
tient to bo gone.
“I am so sorry!” he saiu, with such
gepuino disappointment that Miss
Daffodil could have boxed his ears.
“But, Miss Daffodil, may I coulide in
you?”
“Oh, certainly!” said the dressma
ker, graciously.
“Do you believe in St. Valentine?”
he asked.
“Dear me !” giggled Miss Daffodil
—“whata very strauge question j He’s
supposed to be the patron saint of lov
ers, isn't he ?”
“That’s the reason I asked you,”
said Captain Juniper, leaning his head
still closed towards the spinster’s
worsted hood. “Do you believe in
him?”
“Of course Ido,” smiled the lauy,
with a curious flutter in the region of
her heart.
“Then I am sure I maj trust you,”
said he, fervently. “I shall be under
the casement at daybreak on St. Val
entine’s day to claim Miss Archer as
my Valentine for the year. Tell her so,
from me. Beg her not to disappoint
me again.”
“Yes,” said Miss Daffodil, turning a
dull yellow with rage and vexation—
“yes, captain, I will.”
“I shall be so much obliged to you!”
said the unexpecting lover,
“Oh, not at all !” said Miss Daffo
dil.
“You’re quite sure she didn’t send
me any message ?” said captain Juni
per, wishfully.
“No message,” said Miss Daffodil
smoothly.
‘** * * *
Poor Mahle could hardly see to finish
Miss Waterson’s dress, through her
tear3, and it was midnight when she
laid it aside aud went to bed, crying
herself to sleep.
“He lias forgotten all about me,”
she thought.
St. Valentine’s eve was full of still,
wintry splendor, with a golden line
along the west, and great stars begin
ning to glisten in the apple-green sky
above, when Miss Daffodil put a pre
prosterous splint-basket into Amabel
Archer’s hands.
“I try to be a Dorcas in all good
works,” said she, “and I’ve put these
jams and jellies up for the Widow
Bethiah Hull. She’s dreadful poorly,
they say, and needs watches every
night; so I told her danghter-iu-law
you’d come there and stay to-night.”
Amabel looked up, with a sudden
flash dyeing her cheek. She had not
forgotten that it was St. Valentine’s
eve, and perhaps—
“ Won’t tn-morrew night do as
well ?” said she, pleadingly.
“No, it won’t!” said Miss Daffodil,
tartly.
Amabel said no more. After all,
what did it matter? If David Juni
per had ceased to think about her
what meaning could the soft glow of
St. Valentine’s morn have for her?
So she took the basket and spirit
lessly departed, almost wishing that
she, too, were passing out of life’s
cheerless confines like poor Bethiah
Hull.
“Because,” she thought, “it don’t
seem as if life was worth living, after
all !”
And when the rosy day began to
kindle its soft fires along tho of
the gray cast, Miss Daffodil dressed
herself in her prettiest and most youth
ful dress, curled her stiff, gray-sprink
led head with a hot-iron, washed her
lace in cream of roses, and posted her
self behind tho lattice of Amabel Arch
er’s window.' For she had been “read
ing up” on the subject and knew all
the observances of tho day.
“If he sees me first,” said she, “he’s
bound to be my Valentine, and no mis
take ! And 1 can easily make him be
lieve that I forgot to give the message
to that Archer girl.”
So Miss Daffodil waited, her artifi
cially-blooming face looking almost
ghastly in the fresh irradiation of the
dawning day, her eyes peering, rest
lessly, hither and yonder, over the soli
tary snow.
And Amabel? It had begun to be
just a little light, as she sat there by
the fire in the Widow Bethiah’s room,
and Mrs. Hull, the daughter-in-law of
the invalid, had risen aud was making
preparations for breakfast, when there
came the merry jingling of sleigh-bells,
the sudden cessation of sound, the re
verberation of knocking at the door.
“Miss Amabel, won’t you go and sec
who is there?” called out Mrs. Hull
junior. ‘T ain’t got my hair out of
the crimps yet!”
So Amabel drew the ponderous bolts,
unlocked the front door, ami saw,
standing at the doorsteps—Captain Ju
niper.
“Amabel!” he cried,“my Valentine.”
And he caught her in his arms with
a kiss.
“Remember the privileges of the
day,” he exclaimed, laughing. “Re
member that you are my Valentine for
a whole year to come—perhaps for
ever.”
‘‘But,” cried Amabel, breathless
with amazement, “how came you
here ?”
“By the merest luck in the world,”
said Captain Juniper. “My shaft has
got itself broken. I was going to ask
Mr. Hull for a hit of wire to fasten it
together until I could get to Miss Daf
fodil's. I was going there to see you,
Amabel. Didn’t you expect me?”
“No,” said Amabel, opening her
eyes wide.
“Did not Miss Daffodil tell you that
I was coming?” he asked.
“Not a word,” said Amabel “She
sent me hero to stay with Bethiah
Hull.”
“The centankerous old vixen!” said
Captain Juniper. “So she lias been
playing me false all along. But St.
Valentine’s sweet influence have been
too strong for her at last. Look here,
Amabel darling. I will drive you
home in the cutter. We’ll show her
that we are Valentines after all.”
And, half an hour or so afterward,
the little cutter dashed up the snowy
road under the very casement where
sat Miss Daffodil, blue with cold and
already experiencing sundry twinges of
rheumatism.
She flung the sash open with a smile,
hut the expression on her face changed
whan she perceived that Captain Juni
per was not alone.
“Look, Miss Daffodil,” he cried, au
daciously exultant. “Look at the
sweet girl which St. Valentino has be
stowed on me ! My Valentine—my
promised wife!”
Miss Daffodil closed the shutter with
a 4>ang.
“The folly of them young people !”
she muttered. “I don’t care if 1 nev
er hear tho word valentine again. But
I declare,” she added, after a few min
utes’ melancholy reflection, “it does
seem as if there was some super-natu
ral agency at work.
Talmage’s Prayer at the Funeral
ol' Governor Stephens
“Let us pray: From the everlast
ing to the everlasting thou art God.
The years of our life come and go, and
whiten the hair and slacken the steps,
and push us tottering and decripit in
to the grave. But thy years have no
end. We bow before Thee this after
noon, in a time of national calamity, to
ask Thy comforting grace. We thank
Thee for the life of this good man, fo r
the honesty of his purpose, for the geni
ality of his manner, for the magnifi
dcncs of his great soul. We thank
Thee for all that he did for his native
State; that which he did for the whole
country; for the work he wrought out
in behalf of all Christendom, his life a
eulogy of all that was good and a pro
test against all that was wrong. But,
0, Lord, this afternoon we want thy
comfort. We want it to come first of
all upon his bereaved kindred; may it
be with them through good and had,
and may they rest when this life is end
ed where God shall wipe away all tears
from their eyes, and they will see what
Thou meant by this bereavement.
O, God, put under them the arm of
Thy strength aud sympathy, and hold
them up, and say to them as they pass
through the waters, “I will be with
thee, they shall not overflow with thee.”
God, grant thy blessing upon this city,
this State and our whole country- May
we follow this good man as far as lie
followed that which was right, and
may we consecrate this to Thy service,
and learn the solemn lesson this after
noon; and may we all look forward to
that time when the trials and struggles
of life are ended and we shall enter
among the one hundred and forty and
four thousand that shall ascribe prais
es {p Thy name. Go with us to the
grave for we go to weep there. Guide
us by Thy counsel while we are on
earth and in darkness be Thou our
light; sick, be Thou our physician;
dying, be Thou our life; and dead, be
Thou our resurrection. And glory and
praise and salvation and song shall he
unto Him that sitteth upon the throne
and the Lamb, forever and ever,
Amen.”
On Thirty Day’s Trial.
The Voltaic Belt Cos., Marshall, Mich:
will send Dr. Dye’s Celebrated Electro-
Voltaic Belts and Electric Appliances
on trial for thirty days to men (young or old)
who are afflicted with Nervous Debility,
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restoration of health and manly vigor. Ad
dress as above. N. B.—No risk Is Incurred,
thlrt y days’ trial Is allowed. dec2l-ly-
ARP ON HARMONY.
Tlio Cherokee Philosopher in
the Campaign.
Let well Enough Alone When you
Have It—Discretion at a Trump
Card—Making Governorships for
Everybody and States to Suit.—
The Militia Musters and the Col
onels.
Atlanta Constitution.
Harmony is a good thing. When a
vacancy occurs in a high office, it is a
good thing for the candidates to har
monize. The people are glad to
see ’em harmonizing for Governor.
Most all of us have politely got out of
Governor Boynton’s way, and we are
likely to have no scramble. I’ve fre
quently observed that when a ni3n don’t
get much encouragement he becomes
harmonious and withdraws for thesako
of peace. That is right and it is sensi
ble. Discretion is a trump card. Bet
ter throw up your hand than to play
and lose. The people are not going to
turn out Boynton, for got
nothing against him. He has done
nothing to be turned out for. I don’t
know that they would have put him in
as a regular Governor at the regular
time, but he is in now. The accidents
of life have been in his favor, and he
couldn’t help it, and the people will
risk him the balance of the terra. If
he makes a good Governor and gets
somebody to govern him in the Execu
tive Mansion maybe the people will
keep him a while longer, but we must
have examples as well as precepts.
The mansion wasent bought to be run
by proxy. There are plenty of ladies
willing and waiting who would dignify
and adorn those beautiful halls and
parlors. Boynton is a mighty pretty
name, and Mrs. Governor Boynton
sounds both sweet and splendid.
The rest of the boys will have to
wait awhile but they can afford to wait.
We can’t have but one Governor at a
time. That is the constitution. Some
ol ’em will get pretty old before their
turn comes, but we can’t help it. We
might cut up the State into forty or
fifty little States like Rhode Island,
and give all the boys a little kingdom
apiece like the State of Dade, but l
reckon that would bring out another
swarm of candidates and we would have
to slice up the kingdoms again. Texas
is a good missionary ground for candi
dates. Texas will make 2,200 States
as big as Rhode Island, and that would
provide for 2,200 Governors and 4,400
United States Senators, and more col
onels for the Governors staffs than you
could count. Texas ought to be set
apart for the business, I reckon we
could control the Senate then for all
time. Speaking of Georgia colonels,
I was thinking the other day how there
came to he so many of ’em. We used
to have general musters all over the
State twice a year. The militia were
ordered out to be reviewed by the com
mander-in-chtef, which was the gover
nor. The constitution required him to
review ’em, and he couldent travel all
around in person, he had to do it by
proxy, and so he had his proxy in every
county and he was called the Gover
nor’s aid-de-camp with the rank of col
onel. This gave the Governor over a
hundred aid-de-camps, and they all
took it as a compliment and wore cock
ade hats with red plumes, and epauletts,
and long brass swords, and big brass
spurs, and pistols in their hoisters, and
rode up and down the lines at a gallop,
reviewing the meeiish. The nteelish
were in a double crooked straight line
in a great big field, and were armed
witlt shotguns and rifles, and muskets,
and cornstalks, and thrash poles, and
umbrellas, and they were standing up
and setting down, or on the squat or
playing mumble peg, and they hollered
for water half their time and whisky
the other; and when the colonel and his
personal staff got though reviewing he
halted about the middle of the line and
said, “shoulder arms—right face—
march,” and then the kettledrums rat
tled and the fife squeaked, and some
guns went off half cocked, and the
tneelish shouted awhile and were dis
banded by the captains of their several
companies. These colonels held their
rank and title as long as the Governor
held his office and they were expected
to holler hurrah for the Governor on
all proper occasions and they did it.
If the Governor ran again and was de
feated the next Governor appointed a
new set from among tho faithful and
the old set had to retire from the field
but they held on to the title. Fora great
many years tho old whigs and demo
crats had it up and down, in and out,
and so new colonels were made by the
score until tho State was chock full
again. They had a general muster and
a grand review once up at Lafayette,
and Bob Barry lived up theie and web
the b-hoy of the town. Bob never wore
shoes or a hat or hardly anything else
in those days aud he had petted and
tamed a great big long razor-back hog
and could ride him with a rope bridle,
and so as the colonel and his staff came
galloping down the lines with their
cockades and plumes and glittering
swords. Bob suddenly came out from
behind a house mounted on his razor
back hog and a paper cap with a a tur
key feather in it on his head, and a
pair of old tongs swinging from his sus
penders, and some spurs on his bare
footed heels, and he fell in just behind
the cavalcade, and got the hog on a
ran, and scared their horses, and the
whole concern ran away and the hog
after ’em, and such a yell and such an
uproar was never heard in those parts
or any where else. The hog never stop
ped running until he got home, when
J FOUR DOLLARS PER ANNUM.
j he dismounted and took to the woods
for fear of consequences. Bob is run
ning a Sunday school now, and I’m
glad of it, for it will take a good deal
! of missionary work in him to make up
for some things the Lafayette people
tell about.
But these militia musters got to he
such farces that the legislature abolish
,ed ’em about thirty-five yeats ago,
j though they couldent abolish the colo
: nels. When the war broke loose most
! of era went into the artny and got re
duced. Many a peace colonel got to
be a war major or a captaiu, or even a
high private, and in that way their
ranks were thinned. Our Governors,
however, still make a few new ones as
j often as they are elected, and so the
j peace colonel is still destined to live
i and illustrate the good old State. The
I Georgia majors are not so numerous.
They came from these same militia
musters, for every county had her bat
talions and every battalion had its
major. But now his destiny is fixed.
There are no more majors to come, and
the old stock is passing away. I’m
glad you have a paper in your town
that is perpetuating the good old name,
for the time was in the good old days
when he was a power in the land—
when he, too, wore epauletts and a
sword and marched his cohorts up the
hill and inarched ’em down again.
After the muster was over then came
the horse swapping, and the horse races
and tho pugilistic exercises in the town
in front of the groceries. No pistols,
nor knives, nor sticks were allowed,
but the boys stripped to the waist and
went at it with nature’s weapons. It
was short work, and quick work, and
nobody hurt very much, though some
times Billy Patterson got an awful lick.
These fighting boys had no cause to
quarrel, but Raney Sniffle wanted it
settled as to who was the best man in
his beat. That was about, all.
Bill Ann.
Kather too Suggestive.
Chicago Cheek.
A tali man with a bad case of ca
tarrh on his hands, or rather in his
head paced with measured tread into
the editorial rooms of a newspaper
published in this State, and found the
melancholy proprietor on deck.
“Say,” ejaculated the tali matt, “do
I owe you anything?”
“No,” gasped the editor turning
white
“Don’t I always pay for my adver
tisement quarterly in advance?”
“Ye—yes, you do,” said the editor,
“yes, you are the one who always pays
regularly.”
“Ever do you any particular inju
ry?”
“N-n-n-no, you’r the one who nev
er struck me, never kicked me, never
did me the least injury in the world.”
“Ever refuse to take your paper out
of the post office?”
“O, no,sir You are the subscriber
who never played that scurvy trick on
me.
“Ever ask you to take a bushel of
corkey turnips and two male cats as
part pay?”
“No, you are the kind patron who
never asks me to throw off a cent.”
“Well, then, what in the thunder
do you mean by this kind of moukey
work?”
The tall man shoved a copy ol a
newspaper under the nose of the shrink
ing, shriveling editor,
i “That’s my congh syrup advertise
ment, ain't it?” said the man with
chronic catarrh.
The editor looked at it, and replied
feebly in the affirmative.
“Well, don’t you think that’s a pret
ly low down way of treating a man?”
“Wh—wh—what is the—the—the
principal difficulty?”
“Why, can’t yon see what a dead
give away the whole thing iB?”
The editor scanned the article again,
and then laid the paper aside, wiped
his red eyes, and said:
“Why, it seems to read all right
and I don’t discover any words mis
spelled, or typographical errors.”
“Typographical hades! The thing’s
typographically all right, but look
where it’s hung up; see what’s under
it.”
“O, that’s a death notice,” whined
the editor. “At this season of the
year some folks will die, you know.”
“Well,' thunder and sewer gas! but
what kind of a place is that to put my
cough syrup ad., right on top of a
death notice? Looks too blamed sug
gestive to me. Looks as though it
was a kind of a sequence, or flush roy
al, first the cough syrup, then death.
Catch the connection, don’t you? Now
don’t you never let me catch you at
that-trick again. You hear my bro
ken English?”
Fanners and others desiring a gen
teel, lucrative agency business, by
which $5 to S2O a day can be earned,
send address at once, on postal, to H.
C. Williamson & Cos., 195 and 197
Fulton Street, New York. dec29-om.
♦
An old lady in Massachusetts, prob
ably a relative of Mrs. Partington,
heard that John Bright was goiug to
visit this country. “Well, said she,
“I hope he won’t bring his disease
with him.”
Hayesville, 0., Feb. 11,1880.
I am glad to say I have tried Hop
Bitters, and never took anything that
did me as much good. I only took
two bottles and I would not take
SIOO for the good they did me. I
recommend them to my patients, and
get the best results from their use.
C. B. Metsceb, M. D.
NO. 51.