The Northeast Georgian. (Athens, Ga.) 1872-1875, June 06, 1873, Image 1

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Newspaper Page TextL, 6aktt EDITORS AMD PROPRIETORS, At TfPd dollars Ter Annum, Cash in advance. ftrspetimen CopicsSont Free on Application.' From Pomerov’s Democrat. WAS JOB A fraud: Job wasn't much of a fellow, after all, in my opinion. He acquired a choap reputation for meekness and patience, by cultivating a crop or two nf tolerably sensitive boils; and I sup pose there isn’t much doubt that Job lid have a considerable yield of sore places; but I can’t see many cartloads of virtue in being patient and quiet, when the exertion necessary to let fly a respectable streak of profanity would have piade the boils ache like thunder. Job did the best he could under the circumstances, and Til bet he hunted about to get iuto an easy position with a ton more of anxiety to l)e comforta ble than he ever cherished to get his name into history. Job and Stanley got more renown out of slim material than any’oody I ever heard of—except, perhaps, Postmaster Grant, of Coving ton, whose fame is erected on the rep utation of his son. What a tip-top thing it. is for the old man that his fame isn’t very ponderous! But the fact of the matter is, Job’s bolo weren’t half so contrary, and hard to live with, as some things which I am compelled to smile at. while the whole inside of me is crammed with “cussin.” Job never had twins. Neither did I, since I come to think of it, but somebody had, and I can be found most any night, altout any time between one and six o’clock in the morning, in airy costume, with a twin under each arm, stirring around with the necessary velocity to shake the colic out of one twin, and to shake the slowest tooth that ever undertook to grow out of the other twin. Talk about “biles!” I’d rather have a peck of carbuncles judi ciously distributed all over me Then Job's wife didn’t have a sewing machine and he didn’t live under another man’s wife who also had a sewing machine. If Job could have listened, patently, to two sewing machines, that had just bcecn greased up and seemed to have an inclination to sew up all creation in five minutes, without feeling that it would relieve him, a trifle, to sit down and “cuss” the inventor for an hour or two, he was better got up, in point of disposition, than I’ve ever given him credit for. But I have to boar all this with a show of patience that makes me appear almost like an angel. I can think “cuss”—and I do some consid erable—but if I uncorked once the mother of those twins would feel called upon to bend up a coal-hop over my head, and I don’t like to have the twins see their female parent taking such violent-exercise. “Biles!” Give us our “biles,” Job, and you take the sewing machines. You can have the twins, too, if you hanker for affliction, and. if you think you can stand it, I could )>c induced to throw the mother NO. 37. m.n sf.eies—volume u. NEW SERIES—VOLUME 1. yotlf “biles” wjth patience. If you don't want my place, I guess, Colfax or Alley will give way to you. Neither of us care much about remaining in the service of the country now. We think some of devoting our whole time to building railroads. If we don’t do this, I think we shall try to die, pretty soon. We properly should have made arrangements to enter upon this enter prise, a month or two ago, but we couldn’t makp necessary arrangements for a respectable funeral. When I was in New York, however, a few-days since, my attention was attracted to a engaged a couple of mourners each for Alley, Ames afid myself, as I have a sort of a notion that there ought to lie some mourners at a Republican's funeral; and I don’t sec now hut that we three fellows can die under as favor able circumstances as we could expect, loot’s die hoys, and swear that the Democrats killed us—which I guess may he is the fact, figuratively speakiii Dave’Wood. PROFESSOR The Boston Journal of Chemistry says: While Darwin can “ever” the whole animal kingdom, man included, from a single low form of life, Agassiz con siders it necessary to assume separate creations for the different races of men; but we cannot see that either has yet made out his case. Agassiz calls the Darwinian theory “a mire of assertion.” What would Darwin-si*, of the fol lowing, which the Scieni^c Press, of San Incaneisoo, quote from^ireccnt'lcc WARS NOW GOlNU ON. -nave _ ^ peeificdifferences between' the honnl and nervous systems of the white man the and negro*. Indeed, their frames are alike in no particular. There is no. bone in the negroes hotly wbieli is re-1 lativcly of the same shape, size, artic ulation, or cliem!c.dly of the same composition as that of the white man. The negro's hones contain a far greater proportion of calcareoas salts than those of the white man. Even the negro’s blood is chemically a very dif ferent fluid from that which courses in the veins of the white man. The whole I’d agree to take a dozen of the liveliest “bills” that Job liatl, and give ltonds to treat them kindly, if he would take my place at the head of a family of one wife and eleven children, and live, as I do, in the same house with a newly married couple, who haven’t anything to do but love each other to death, and wonder whre in thunder all my children came from. Married folks generally, have more felicity on hand, to l>cgiu with, than they can use to good advantage, but a good deal of it gets pretty well worn out after a while, and' eight or ten pairs of -twins don’t often leave much more than can lie handled without getting into a very wet perspiration. But it’s more or less nggrivating to a veteran to witness the turtle-doving of two beginners, who have to carrv a piece of ice ahout them to keen their hearts from “combust ing.” I toll you I’d rather have “biles” than to be thus reminded of the time when I’d have lwt a cow that Tnhitha was nn angle, whose wings hadn’t sprouted, Til bet a cow row, that she’s no such thing ; and I’ll bet another cow that I should win the first one, if any stranger should holed by Tabitha’s first appearance to take the bet. Then again, Job was not a Repub lican nnd caught stealing from the peo ple. Job had “biles”—no one dis puling it—but lie didn’t have any Credit “Af»-“biters" to pain him, as I have, and as my friends, Colfax and Alley, have. I can’t speak for these t wo fellows—I don’t exactly know how they do feel; but as for myself, I might just as well say here ns anywhere, that I l>ore up under-the stealing first-rate, hut getting found out is what gives me the backache. Colfax and Alley have some outward signs of being unwell that I have, hut I don’t knowhow they feel at the pit of the stomach. .-I had the advantage of Job, somewhat, while 1 was serving my counter by getting up a Pacific Railroad, uniting in close communion the “rocky coast of the Atlantic with the golden shores of the Pacific.” That ojieration did not pain •»c a hit, you l>ct; and if Colfax nnd Alley i»ndu’t took ft into' their' heads ” vi >it the Trcasuttry Department, iV. cri » Ur tmited .patriotism was too n ay for the floors, which broke down ■ ;> et the r<op ,j money run out, wo don » S V s SR ^ht 'to-day. It i>eonlc "I l ° Ki of a ®J' use to tell the ind P M ” Cllt ' tT »on,Ttopublicans tion to , ^r tative <’ touk the precau- ouroiviTfo ’ji t,ie 8 Pilt cash with \z:ziT^ a,,d ,mve car ° fu,iy know what real till ° r 'oi 1 Itcpuhlic is ungrate- . .i' ** centuries before an- ; n „ f °f ,nen make such last- Rcr.nl * mnts y° n ttoe nation, as we and ste P wc ’ ve taken, took «i P art,cul »«y tlios which wc S sto^T UDtenD S alib ut the Uni- "ill always rc- werc- t ,G I**? 10 of wtoat we dEV-SwW between the Republican Government of Shnin and Don Carlos, the legitimate heir of the Bourbons to the throne. This war has continued for some time, with varying success. At present there seems no hope of a decided victory by either army. II. The war between Cuba and the mother country. This struggle has continued -for years. It lias beeu pros ecuted with vigor on both sides and ferocity on one. The end is not yet III. The war between Russia and Khiva. The telegrams have informed us lately that Khiva was captured and the Khan conquered. Our morning dispatches contradict this rumor. Russia, though she will doubtless ulti mately be successful, will have to eam her conquest of the Khanate of Khiva by marching over the deserts of the Khan and fighting his soldiers. IV. The war between Captain Jack and his Modocs and the military power of the United States. This unequal struggle, unequal more especially ou the part of the United States, has continued for months. It lias cost us a brigadier-general of the array, a nnm- lier of officers of lower grades, and not a few non-commissiond officers and privates, not to mention the great cx- jx-nses of war in Dragon. Captain Jack, too, has lost, if the telegrams are to l>e believed, a number of redskins ual to more than double the number of his original force, unfortunately for us, without diminishing his ardor or lowering the cfficienty of his corps of sharpshooters. The Universal Peace Alliance has not yet, we regret to say, converted Captain Jack from the ends of his martial ways. Hine tila; lachry- »ue. V. The war between the Dutch and the Sultan of Atchecn. ^his conflict will, after the close of the present arm ed neutrality, break out. liefore many months with renewed fury. or VI. Tlie,war between Sir Samuel 1 Baker, and his forces and the slave-deal ers of the White Nile. Late dispatches show that the painful rumor of the death of this hardy explorer and ac complished wife has no truth in it. Sir Samuel is therefore now executing his mission in the very heart of Africa. To all these wars must be added the occasional coflicts that occur on tire hanks nf the Rio Grand between the Mexicans and the Texans; the chronic revolutions of Central and, South America; the difficulties'between the English in India and the wild tribes nn their northern frontier — difficulties finally to be settled only by force arms; and the internal struggles, lead ing to occasional bloodshed, in most countries of the world, not excepting our own. Peace nmy come, hut it has not come. —that is, in his bones, muscles, nerves, and fibres, the chimpanzee has not much farther to progress to become a white man. This fact science inex orably demonstrates. Climate has no more to do with the difference between the white man and the negro than it has with that between the negro and the chimpanzee, or it has between the horse and the ass, or the eagle and the owl. Each is a distinct and separate creation. The negro and the white man were created as specifically different as.thc owl and eagle. They were designed to fill different places in the system of nature. The negro is no more a negro by acci dent or misfortune than the owl is the kind of a bird he is by accident or mis fortune. The negro is no more the white man’s brother than the owl is the sister of the eagle, or the ass the brother of the horse. How stupendous, and yet how simple is the doctrine that the maker of the universe has created different species of men, just as He hag the different species of the tower animals, to fill different places and offices in the grand machinery of nature.” Despite the efforts of the Universal physical organization of the negro Hif- <laufjhter / of S hem and Ham, but of Peace Alliance, there arc now a num- fers quite asrnucli from the whiteman s | s fi an , ber of wars going on. Men have not as it does from that of the chimpanzee yet even begun to beat their swords into plowshares and their spears into pruning-hooks. We could wish that the Peace Alliance could* have its way, but unfortunately sec ns yet no sign of of such occurrence. There are now going on. I. An internecine war Medicines. me in my lava bed. A circus an old eravevard mac West Chester, Pa., sacfthcTother da; How does a yonbg ladr, who fa en gaged, find herself?: taken) of course. Singularly, none of the papers have yet said thnt in these days of bustles. { A Wisconsin man was finefl §5 for every woman if a papers carriers |i fin Htnig off a cat’s ears with a iack-knift. \ A* Net* ■Hampshire "man has th eory Clay’s gig fa running yet in ington, Kentucky. I has just been discovered that the Iocs scalped General Canby. jfeatiiar strap whiefr fr—Jfriyhpd g j family -throughthree generations. m* * An Iowa merchant won’t advertise in the papers, but paints on the fences, etc., ‘ ‘Go two Allen’s for yer dri gods.” A negro, on being examined, was asked if his matter was a true Christian. “No, sir, lie is a politician,” was the reply. Mr. Watkins went home from a party with a banana in his pocket, and is sorry he didn’t think of it before he sat down. A Clergyman lately said that the modern young ladies wore not the TROTTING EXTRAORDINARY. Two Hundred Miles Hours, in Forty-five Burying Of The Law.—A great ceremony, called “The Burying of the ‘ the S Law,” lately took place in the Spanish Synagogue of Jerusalem. It happens once every eight or ten years, and is accompanied by the following circum stances:—There is in the “Talmud Torah” synagogue a subterranean cave, wherein every old leaf torn out from any holy book, every old worn-out Bible, Gemara and phylactery is de posited by all the Jewish inhabitants of every Minting. After eight or ten years, when the cave is full, these old papers and books ore brought out and made up iuto bales. This done, the people begin to assemble at a given time in the afternoon. A cosher (or faultless) Sepher Torah, richly- orna mented and jewelled, fa brought by the Chacham Bashi, and carried by him, #ud the other rabbis in turn, at the bead of the procession. Ho fa f’ol towed bv other rabbfa; next come the hales, abo ut seventy or eighty in num ber, each carried by a Jew ; and then the rest of the people. The procession slowly winds its way out of the front Zion gate for some distance along the city liill, and then descends into Ihe valley of Jehosaphat, where the burial ground is situated. Here is a very deep well, wherein the bales are thrown amidst the singingof the joyous crowd. On Wednesday and Thursday, the 14th and loth instants, the Driving Park at St. Paul, Minn., was the scene of nn extraordinary trot, Mr. Martin Delaney matching his sorrel mare (a small full-blooded Morgan) to trot 200 miles in forty-eight hours for the small stake of $200. The St. Paul Press says of the first day: The trot was commenced yesterday at twenty minuets past four a. m., Mr. J. Cummings holding the ribbons. The mare started out at a rate of more than ten miles an hour for the first two hours, and was gradually stowed to about an average 6ften miles an hour. At five minutes past ten she had completed the first fifty miles, making it in some five hours and for ty-five minutes. She was then given a rest of three hours and a half, and was started at a little past half-past one on the second fifty miles. At half-past seven she had completed it, having made the first hundred miles in fifteen hours, which leaves thirty-three hours for completion of the other hun dred. She made tho last mile of her first hundred yesterday, the fastest of any—five and one-half minutes. Those who witnessed the feat say that the mare showed no sign of fatigue, never sweat a hair, and trotted off to the sta ble to feed at the end of her day’s laltor as brisk as though she had just come from the barn. Of the second the same paper says: Wednesday the first 100 miles was completed, and at half-past seven o’clock the mare was driven to the stable apparently in as good condition as if she had only travelled one quarter of the distance. .Yesterday morning when taken out of the barn at five o’clock to complete the trot she seemed a little sore at first, hut soon wanned up and commenced her days’s work with won derful case. At ten o’clock she had completed thirty-one miles, aud was withdrawn until four minutes past twelve p. m. After this rest, in which she manifested no signs of weariness, she made her next seven miles in one hour and two minutes. Nopains were taken to keep a regular account of her rate of speed, but in general terms it averaged through the day about six minutes and five and one-half seconds per mile for the first fifty miles, and seven minutes nnd two and one-half seconds for the second fifty miles. Af ter the rest given the marc—from sev en until nine o’clock in the evening—all partieson the ground saw that she would make her 200 miles easily. She pur sued her even gait, and a few minutes past one o’clock this morning completed the race, making her last mile nine minutes and thirty-one seconds. Thus she won the wager, and in three hours less than the time given her. She trotted off the track seeming ly unconscious of the marvel she had performed. “Does hanging prevent murder?” asks an exchange. Few men feel like murdering anybody after they have been well hanged. According to Florida papers, fleas have multiplied there to such an ex tent that all the inhabitants arc suffer ing from phlebitis. A young man ata party one evening being asked if he could play the harp sichord, wanted to know if it was any tiling like seven-up. A New Orleans man says the longest funeral ho ever heard of took place a weed ago. His hired girl went to it and hasn’t got back yet. The funeral of Oakes Ames at Bos ton was as imposing as it would have beck if his name had never lienn con nected with the Credit Mobilier. An old lady hearing some men speak ing of the immense quantity of lumber being sent to Culia and London from America, says does the “Cars take it?” Philosopher Johsh Billings says: A man that starts out on the day of his marriage, as a first lieutenant in his family need never expect to be pro moted. It is unlawful to give atoll cr a chew of tobacco. Tuff law forbid any one to “sell or dispose of tobacco in any form without paying a license.” legro militia are being enlisted fatly but rqpidly” in South Caroli- A city paper tells us that a favorite hotel is to be kept this season at one yf the watering-places, “by the widow of Mr. , who died last summer on a new and improved plan.” Why does’t the government organize half a dozen bald-head brigades and hurl them like a bolt of sixfold thunder upon the Modocs? Nobody else’shair seems to be safe in the business. . *“!•. I™ 1 ’ ywan ^.erwwjsiSS: Wc oou hav Fancy Prices for Fancy Ani mals.—At a sale of thorough bred cat tle which took place in Wauncgan, El., April 9th, eighty-four head were sold for $45,530, in the aggregate, being an average of about $536. . The highest prices paid were for two imported cows and one bull, the three animals costing the purchaser the neat little sum of $5,000. An Auburn woman fell dead while threshing her boy for going to the cir cus. It will take but a tow more such cases to convince mothersof theirerror in supposing boys can’t go whera they please. An old lady in a town of Worcester county lately refused the gift if a load of wood from a tree struck by light ning, through fear that some of the “fluid” might remain in the wood, and cahse disaster to her kitchen, stove. “How shall we settle the labor ques tion?” exclaimed a member of tfae Georgia Legislature, in the midst of his speech. “By all going to Work and earning your living honestly!” thundered an irreverent spectator iu the gallery. “Men arc what women make them,” is the Singular title of a new hook. It may be true, hut Wc lipve seen some dreadfully poor specimens of the manufactured article, which fact reflects badly either upon the material or the maker. A Wisconsin school teacher, when a pupil is disobedient, idle, or refrac tory, administers to the delinquent a dose of castor oil. He says such treatment ought to render the scholars dose ’ile.” He evidently needs a quart or so himself. When a woman goes to purchase a bonnet she will not take oue slie does not like. Yet in the far more impor tant matter of a husband she frequent ly takes one slie cares nothing about, and for whom she has neither respect, love nor admiration. Judged by the rule that he is a suc cessful agriculturist who knows how to make “two blades grow where one grew before,” the negroes are the finest farmers in the world; for nnder their skillful culture it fa.no uncommon thing to see a dozen blades Cofgmss) grow where one grew before.—Manon Vommonvxalth. Cerebro-spinnl meningitis and horse stealing caused respectively a nearly equal numlicr of deaths in Kansas last month. / ' A lady died in Freeport, R. I., in a dentist’s chair, under the influence of chloroform. The Rhode Island Medical .Society has determined to admit women to full membership. A Pennsylvania women challenges any man in her county to a wrestling match for the championship. A man who gives his children hab its of industry provides for them bet ter than by giving them a fortune. The city of Richmond realizes about six thousand five hundred dollars per annum from license tax on dogs. The French Government supports England’s efforts to suppress the slave trade on the Eastern coast of Africa. A plant has been discovered in An gola, so sensitive that it closes its leaves at the mere sound of an approaching footfall. Last month there were 386,341 dead letters received at the dead let ter office; of this number 26,475 were held for postage. , The Judge of a Kentucky Court has decided that a ^wspaper reporter has a right, under the statute, to carry arms at all times. The Austin (Tex.) Gazette of ihe 3d ult. contains seven advertisements, of fering rewards for the apprehension of as many murderers. Galveston, Texas, has received cards for the approaching marriage of a young gentleman and lady of that ilk aged respectively fourteen aud twelve. Mrs. John C. Wetherby, a niece of cx-Gov<Snor Alvarada, of Mexico, was arrested for vagrancy and drunkenness in the streets of San Francisco lately. She is a highly educated woman, but naughty. The suicide of snakes has been very _ apriag upon_ti»o Iowa . its the reptiles crawl up from the swamps to sun themselves upon tlie warm rails, are cut to pieces by the passing trains. Not to be behind hand, Muncy, Penn., produces a ghost in the shape of a beautiful youug lady, who goes from house to house, never speakiug to any one and only murmuring: “I can not findi t—I cannot find it. All through the life of a pure-mind ed, but feeble-bodied man, his path is lined with memory’s grave stones, which mark the spots where noble en terprises perished, or lack of physical or to embody them in deeds. The only client of the late Chief Jus- ice Chase during the first six months after putting up nis shingle as attorney at law, was a man who paid him half a dollar for drawing an agreement, nnd canto hack a few days after to borrow the half dollar. ; A North Carolina doctor, recently deceased, bequeathed to another phy sician, who was his intimate friend, his skeleton, to be set up where it would most frequently remind tho liv ing of the dead, and do some good in furthering the cause of science. ' ri ~ bequest was declined.. “Indian Sally” is the name of a a Muscogee squaw living in Bullock county. She is said to be 104 years old and identified with the Indians who were friendly to the whites in 1814, accompanied Gen. Jackson in his Sent noble campaign in 1818, and exhibits with pride a pot given her by “Old Hickory.” A well-to-do German farmer has been found in Washington township, Iowa, who has a daughter twenty years old, a dwarf and cripple in body awl mind, aud he has kept her for fifteen I xsvrs in a box three feet six inches long >y twenty-two inches wide, in a filthy ilittle den in the attic of his house. She was nearly naked, and so starved that she ate the filth iu her miserable sty. Most people are like an egg, too pin thpmsdla *j bold ennytEng else. “Misery luvs company,” but kan’t bear kompetishun; thare ain’t no bod- dy but what thinks tharo bile iz the sorest bile in-markit. To be a big man among big men iz what proves a man’s character—to be a bnl frog turning tadpoles don’t amount to mutch. What a blessed thing it is that we kan’t “see ourselves as other see us”— the sight would take all thfc starch out ov ua. " Tfaese iz lots of photbs in thfa-worid who kan keep nine or the command ments without enny trouble at all, hut the oue that iz left they kant keep the small end o:. Expcktashun is the child ov Hopr, ja.v-'io'P Onr Cash Rates of Advertising* S!T* Advertisement.*, from this date, inserted at One Dollar per.Square (of one Ineli) for tho first' insertion, and Seventy-fire Cents |«r Square for etch additional Inaertion. , , Funeral Notices and Obituaries charged for regular Advertising riAe*. No axtrachargc for Local or Special aolnmn an* Transient Advertlsementscash. Other hills coTicCU'd every ninety days. •VLiticralcontraet* made for any period over one month. iProfessiotictl Cards. Dlt. J. E. POPE •RESPECTFULLY offer. Lie Pro- JL (I fcsiinnal Services to tho Citizens qt Athens and Adjacent Country. Occupies theoffleo formerly occupied by Dr. If. Carlton. At nlglit.lfc cSnrc found at the r»d- lunnKuft. fobu-lf Forpver Forty.Vcars tliia. PURELY VEGETABLE. Liver Medicine has proved lo1*c the GREAT UNFAILING SPECIFIC Surveyor, Architect. rpHE undersigned, hrrying a com- JL pleto net of .Surveying Instrument*, Is now rendytodonli kinds of ^urveyin#, vi*.: .Laying f City Lot*, Homesteads, Plantations, Ac., and akin# a<ptirate Plots of the same. * r . , .lie Is also prepaied to exd’Ute allMlfiicriptinns of jrrrifitog, to furnish Plans for ITouses, Urid£<-*, Ac.’, nhu make estimates of timfi Can bt fofmd at the Ijfv Offifitof Captain li IV Lumpxln. K. K- LUMPKIN.. janUl-tf County Uflrveynr. Heart Burn, Cll ILLS and FEY KB, Ao., Ac. After years of careful experiments, to meet great and urgent demand, wo now produce from our original tienuinc Powders, • THE PREPARED iqtiid form of Simmons* Liver Regulator, con taining all its wonderful and valuable properties and ott'er it in ONE DOLLAR BOTTLED The Powders, price ns before, ...$1.00 per parkam Sent by mail 1.04 CAUTION. Ruv no Powders or Prepared Simmons' Regula tor unless in our engraved wrepiicr. with trade mark, sump and signature unbroken, None oth er is genuine. J. II. ZEILIN & CO., - Macon, On., and Philadelphia SOLD BY ALL OHUCltilSTS. janS-Ciu KING’S CURE Is Certain $ Prompt TTSED TWICE A WEEK, IT IJ will prevent the Disease among Poultry, «i all Idnds. One Bottle, worth FIFTY CENTS, oakes Two Hallows of Medicine. The use of it will save Thousands of Dollars annually to North •ast Georgia. , TREPAK F.D BY DR. WM. KING ATHENS, And sale hy Merchant* generally, and hr BARRETT, LAND A CO., Augusta, Wholesale Agents. . » feh21-Gni A Yankee grocer, being solicited to contribute to the building of a new church, promptly subscribed his name to the paper in the following manner: Jones (the only place in town where you can get o'even pounds of good sugar for a dollar,) twenty-five cents.” A young lady of much worth aud no little weight, in Davenport, not very long since, accidently set down upon a skunk in a garden and smother ed it. Her Jover came to see her that night, and told her he would not marry her unless she changed her hair oil. They have a jocose custom-honse officer in a town not far from tho Hob. A few days since a gentleman return ing from Europe asked what the di on the Parian figure of a youug in a musing attitude would be. official looked up a minute, and replied, ‘Hum! maiden! meditation! fancy! free!” A man West who married a widow has invented a device to cure her of “eternally” praising her former hus band. Whenever she begins to descant on his noble. qualities, this ingenious No. 2 merely says:; “Poor dear man! how I wish he hadn't died and the lady immediately thinks of something els* to talk about. Be careful how you go to sleep at an auction. A gentleman settled him self in ft comfortable chair, and, his senses soothed by the auctioneer’s Ini- lablv, soon dropped asleep. When his nap was over he left the place. The next day he was astounded at the receipt of a hill for several hundred dollars worth of carpets and other things. The auctioneer hod received his sleepy nods for bids. nn .i |;i. n a, • for LiV'KR Coy plaint anti t lie painful olfaprina ami like its parents, iz an arragont 1 1 horror, to-wit: dy.si'ki-sia, comsth-athin, brat. I ■I»i">»lii<\ billions alt;u1cs, SICK IIKAIIACIIK, rr., , , . . , Colic, Depression of Spirits, Sol'll STOMACH, 1 hose who expekt tew keep them- - selves pure in this life must keep their souls bileing all the time, like a pot, and keep all tlic time skimming the surface. It dop’t do tew trust a man too much who iz alwus in a hurry, he iz like piss-mire, whose heart and bones lavs in hiz heels. Jelous people always luv themsclfs more than they do thoze whom they are jelous ov. Curiosity iz the germ ov all cntcr- prizes—men dig for woodchucks more for curiosity than they do for wood chucks. X The purest and best specimens ov human natur that the world has ever seen, or over will see, hav bin the vir- tewous heathen. Men don’t fail so often in this world front a want ov right motives os they do from lack ov grip. Thare iz only two men in this world who never make enny blunders,, nnd they are you and me, mi friend. Yung man, yu kant learn ennything hi hearing yourself talk, but yu may possibly Dihearing others. Thare iz lots ov folks in this world whom yu kan bio up like a bladder, anil then kik them ns ye plezc. I hav alwus notissed one thing, that wlien a cunning man burns hiz fingers everything hollers for joy. I suintirncs distinguish between tal- leut and genius in this vray : A man of tallentlcan makes whisscll out ova pig’s tale but it takes d man ov genius to make the tale. I kant tell now whether a goose stands on one leg so mutch to rest tho az to rest the goose. I wish suni scientific man would tell me all about this. -»»>* O' . Thare is a mhety site ov difference whether Mr. John .Smith will appear at Booth’s Theatre as Othello, or wh ther Othello will appear as Mr. John Smith. I had rather be a child again than to be the autokrat of the world. Thare is liewmeruus individuals in the land who look tipon what they hain’t got az tlie only things worth hav ing. Thare iz those who kant laff with impunity; if they ain’t stiff and solium they ain’t nothing. A fu branes in a man’s bed are az noizyas shot fl blow np bladder. One man ov genius to 97 thousand four btiodred and 42 men ov talent iz just afawt^he rite perproshun for Uk- tuall bizZncss. . . - ; Yentilashun iz a good thing, but when a man kant lay down and sleep n> a TVr¥!7 , T 9G inalOnkerlot without taking down W lengths ov fence to let the wind in ho ’\ T* A O Tpi /^TT iz altogether too airfah. _ -IVI—LJu OTi-VJ W 111 I think that a hen who undertakes to lay 2 eggs a day must necessarily neglect sum other branch of bizzuess. Thare iz “menny a slip between a cup and a lip,” but not liatf as meny as thare ought tew be. The two most important words in any lauguuge are the shortest—“Yes and ?‘No.” One ov the mo?t honest and reliable men i kno ov at the present time, iz “Old Probabilitizlie iz an ornament and honor to his sex. > Rather than not hav faith in enny thing, I am willing tew be beat 9 times out ov 10. I don’t never hav enny trouble in re gulating . mi own kondukt, but tew keep other pholks straight iz what both ers me.—J\’etc York Weekly. Buffalo Bill was at Hartford, Con necticut, the other day, and while visit ing Colt’s armory, the large number of spectators who had assembled to see the famous«eout, desired Iiira to favor them with an exhibition of his skill'as a marksman. Bill gave the chew of tobacco in his mouth to a small hoy to keep warm, a small-piece of white pa per was put up on a barn do6r fifty rods distant, B. Wiliam seized a fine new rifle, spit on his hands and in the manner so often described by Ned Buntline, raised the rifle until bis nose rested,on the stock, fired, and a picket was knocked off from a fence ten feet to the left of the Iwrn. This rifle bar rel is crooked, said Bill, so saying he hit it over a stone to straighten it, then shot again, this time barking the shin of an old pie woman on his right flank. A third trial and he hit the barn fair in the centre, and the shout that arose the assemblage attesed the joy of the spectators.. AMARCOmi. A. S. KUWIN, 1IOWFXL CUliU COBB, ERWIN & COBB, ATTORNEYS AT LAW, A TIIESS, C, K OK GJA. Office iii (he Dcujirec liuilJiny.^fiS-i SAMUEL P. THURMOND, o&florncy at JLair, ATHENS, GEORGIA. Office over Barry’s Store* Broatl Plrrtt. Ttf Will Practice in tlie Counties of (Harke, Walton/ Jackson, Banks* Franklin, Xia«U*onau4 Hall. AGreatAWenttl Discern MADE BY NIKS. L. E. BUSH Jl'tJ TAVERN, IVALTON COUNTY, <!A. H ERE Is WHAT cave riae to tlie Wonderful Discovery: My little daughter, Claudia, was tH-rerely burnt on her cheek with an egg. After irving everything tlie moot learned Pliy>ieian of thift county recommended, and all seemed to do no Rood, my little daughter continued to grow wonc and worse. In a few weeks who began to breakout in running wrw, nil over, and I naturally became alarmed about her condition. I dropped all, else, liegan to compound a medicine of my own, which titter tho first application, I discovered produced «. jrreat change, nnd in five days my little girl fared otT without a seur. Mrs. Bush’s Specific Cure -FOR- BURN'S asi. SCALDS Will 1* iwld tlirmlKh Agrnt* enlirolv. Mr. and Mrs. L. BUADHBUKY am my agent*foi- Clarke county. Mr. RANlHlLl'h Mr. HARRISON UlUlKJLSare Agents for Jack son and Hall counties. * niv30-ly In March last, my xrifi, was afflicted with severe Rheumatism in her left shoulder and arm. I ap- f dird cvoryg.SMi remedy that, wus prcsorilHsl, hoi i«ind nothing to relieve the phln until I applied I'aniol’aMaaie-Oil, which gave immediate relief alier the second application. I.. W. STEPHENS. Thi. is to certify that I have used DAXIEL’f. MAGIC OIL, and 1 can recommend it I'lir Frost Hite. Chilblain, Sprains and Jlruises. Iam satis fied that no one would reeret trviug it. M. F. DAVIS, Chief l’olico, Athens, « W. A. Carlton’s ANTI-DYSPEPTIC TONIC A Western paper says they have discovered a petrified ham at San An dreas, Cal., sixty feet below the sur face. To what reflections does not this incident give rise? Was the ori ginal proprietor of that ham, when in an unsalted condition, corn-fed or oth- wise ? Was his life-blood shed in an antediluvian slaughter house, or did some primitive chawbocon spill bis por cine gore? What became of the re mainder of the animal? Where are (ho gpiperibs? Was aught of him con verted into oleaginous bacon and griz zled for the breakfast of an aborigine in the “vast void of the incalculable past,” over the burning embers of trees whose companions have long since turned into coal-beds, and did his curl ing tail suggest to any mind the possi- . v .. bility that it might be turned . iijto' a TlieSun having displayed thelikenes t in whistle ? What fi story this % of of a Modoc squaw for Miss Susau Eber- ham m-g'.t le'.l, had it a tonguo to hart, nftw does up “Shack Nasty Jim, speak ? We anxiously await intelli- j ” and attempts to its readers into the gencc fram the geologists on this sub-) belief that it is a correct likeness of j.yt, . i Governor Smith. Ah exchange says: A story is going tho rounds about a girl dying of tight lacing. These ugly corsets should be abolished instanter; and if the girls cannot live without being squeezed, we suppose men could be found who would sacrifice themselves. We would rather devote three hours a day with out a cent of pay,-as a- brevet corset, than to sep our giris dying off in that kind of style. Office hours almost any time. 1 Useful in nee* of GENERAL DEBILITY. Particularly adapted to cases of Indigestion, Imss of Appetite, Con.dijM- tion, Headache, And rarlmis oilier complaints arising from a Dis ordered stomach. They are »l*o a good LIVER REGULATOR, ami a sure preventive o! CHILLS AND FEVER DiRKcnoxs.i-Tnke a tablespoonful three times a day liefore weals. If too active lesseu the dose. rr.Kl'AUl'D ONLY BY R. T. BRUMBY & CO., DRUGGISTS AND PHARMACISTS, ATHENS, GA. T. MARKWALTER, Jflurble W*orks BilO.lD ST., ACfil'mi BA A/TARBLE MONUMENTS, Tomb iVl el*-., Marltle Mantles, Vnmiure Work of all kinds, fount Aka plainest to the trust. elalxTile desi^nk, and furnished to order at short nolle.. All wntk for the country curefullv-'liotcd j. s. Dortch, Attorney at Law, CARNE8YILT.E, GA. W, R. LITTLE, Attorney at Lawj CARKESVILLR, GA. business Cards: PAINTING. W. M. BONE* -pROPOstv-s to Tro 1 , All kinds JL of Painting—House, Fumituro work-in the neatest, cheapest end most durably stvle. Also, imitation work aud glazing and paper hanging done at short notice. prompt attention given to all order* left at tho. Drugstore*, or at his Shop on Clayton *trcet, 2d door S. K. Kpisooiul church, Alhen*Ga. fcb7—ly. BOOTH CHAPPUST, Market Street, near Conrt Ho'me, am.ily Grocery nnd Bair ftooirf Keeps constantly nn hand rimicp.nfmUf Groce ries, of ail kinds, and the best brand! ot Wines, Liquor* imd t'iinlVs. .. Give hs a call, nnd jp-t v^ill find everything in our line of tint he»t, end prices as low as nie lowest. BEUSSE&MOQN, Keeps Constantly on Hand ttye «f ,j| Wines, Liquors nnd Cigars* AT WHOLESALE AND RETAIL. At their BAR will bo found the.best of every thing to drink, served tip ‘‘according to Gunter. Gentleman will also find No. 1 BILLIARD TAIILKS, kept in good order. W. COLLINS ITa* now ft» Storo a Full Stock oi PRY GOOD& €R®e£Bt€S HATS, SHOES* NOTftUft< Of All Kinds, which he offct* -tfc * OKCHLAJE* FOR CASH: J Or in Exchange for Country ProdiflteA 09* The highest market price paid in cash’'■for Cotton. • \ lit*- ¥ OS 8®lt At! CHARLEY HILL At the old established - % Ou Broad Street, over thestnr* of Messrs. _. 1«. C. Mathew*, have the best and. most ult« workmen and all the modem appliances tor Sharing, Shampooing, ZTdir- dressing, etc., Ladies nnd children waited on at their nwddenec.-v when de-ired. Post morlrt* case* .will rereit.; prompf and careful attention. Oct. ll/.lfeft. BARBER SHOE DAVIS HARRIS & SOU, TNFORMS their friends, iustomer.- -L amt the world gcnetallv tiny they are still at their old stand, near Messts lliirkt- Hudgsoti', Rook Store, oil Jtruml .Street, where tlicy do ai: kinds of work in tholr line, Shaving, Hail Cutting &e., Done in tlie best style, with promptness and dis patch. -T. C- DEALER IN DRY GOODS, % And FAMILY GROCERIES. Justly Celebrated Magno lia Hams, Hologna Sau- e, Dried Beef, lined Goods, &e. Xfmir, Pipes, Tobacco arid Scgars, Raisins, Sari dines, Kn!*, Crackers, Cheese, Candy and Pea nuts, Lenten* and Oranges, Pickles, Northern Ap ples and Butter Scotch. Pish paid for country produce. ■ktr Broad Street, Alliens, C*., opposite J. IT. Huggins. apll-ly O’KELLEY’8 SKY-LIGHT PHOTOGRAPH OALLERT, Over Williams’ Shoe Store,- Broad Street. ATHENS, GEORGIA. ’ TDHOTOGRAPH8 and Ferreotypcs J- executed in the finest and best style of rhe art.in cloudy as well as elear weather. Call and be convinced that you can ubtain Tree Likenesses at tMsf Gallery. Terms Cash and Low Prices. J. F. O’KELLEY. Talmadg© <& Borsey Have the finest !?t of FISHING TACKLE Ever brought to this market. Aire a superb lot o PISTOLS And every thing else kept ain first class Jewrlery Store. May -’tf.

Georgia Historic Newspapers

The Northeast Georgian. (Athens, Ga.) 1872-1875, June 06, 1873, Image 1