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EASTMAN TIMES.
A. Real I jive Country Paper.
PUBLISHED EVERY THURSDAY MORNING
—BY—
XI. S. BURT ON.
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THAMES VALLEY SONNETS.
BY I>ANTE O. KOSSF.TTX.
WINTER.
How larpo that thrnsh looks On the bare thorn-tree!
A *warm of such, three little months ago,
Had hidden lu the leaves and lei none kuow
Save by toe outburst of their minstrelsy.
A white flake hero and the re -a snow-lily
Of last night’s fro 4—our naked flower-beds hold ;
Aud tor ftTose-11 >wer on the darkening mould
The hungry roadhreaat gleams. No bloom, no bee.
Tb" current shudders to its ice-bound sedge ;
Nipped in their bath, the stark reeds one by one
Flash each its clinging diamond in the sun,
'Neath winds which for this winter’s sovereign
nledge
Shall curb great king-masts to the ocean’s edge
And leave memorial forest-kings o’erthrown.
SPRING.
Soft-littered is the new-year’s lambing-fold.
And in the hollowed haystack at its side
The shepherd lies o’night now, wakeful-eyed
At the ewes’ travailing call through the dark cold.
The young rooks cheep 'mid the thick caw o' the
old;
And near unpeopled stream-sides, on the ground,
liyjier spring-cry the moor-hen’s nest is found,
Wi etc the (drained flood-lands flaunt their mari
gold,
Chill are the gusts to which the pastures cower,
And chill the current where the young reeds staud
Ah green and close as the young wheat on land ;
Yet here the cuckoo and the cuckoo-flower
Plight to the heart sx>ring’s perfect imminent hour,
Whose breath shall sooth you like your dear one’s
hand.
THE PRACTICAL JOKE.
“ It will bo jolly good fun,” said Tom
Hurd, laughing vociferously, “jolly
good fun. It’s capital to play a joke on
a green fellow like that, he takes it in
so.”
Tom Hurd was the practical ioker of
the school.
Practical jokes were his joy, and now
he had concocted one that was to cap
the climax and make him a shining
light among the fun-loving boys. Pale,
little Jack Kedburn, whose mother was
a clergyman’s widow, who loved her
only child with an. absorbing tender
ness, which he returned in a way few of
the great boys could understand, was
to be the victim.
Harry Pratt was going to New York,
where the mother lived, and Tom Hurd
had instructed him to send a telegram
to Jack, to the care of Professor Law
ton, bearing these terrible word :
“ Your mother is dead. Come home.”
Yes, and Tom had given Harry the
money for this telegram and had written
it out foi him.
“It will kill two birds with one
stone,” said Tom. “Fancy Jack and
the professor going off together in the
gig, and finding the old woman alive
and jolly ! We’ll have a half-holiday,
too, aud that’s worth while, and nobody
eau catch us as I have managed it. It’s
jolly fun ! And to see how they’ll come
back after it! Old Lawton furious and
little Jack full of the story—ha, ha ! It
Will ho fuu r
“Hut it will scare him so,” said one
small boy.
“ You hold your tongue,” said Tom.
“ What’s the fuu of the joke if it
didn’t ?”
And so Harry pockoted the telegram
and bidding good-bye to his friends,
departed.
It was noon, next day. The boys
were playing in the school yard. Little
Jack sat perched upon the gate looking
out along the road. He was talking to
his chum, Will Sparrow.
“Six weeks to vacation,” ho said,
“and then I shall have six more with
mamma. I shall go out with her to see
things, and in the evening she will take
me in her lap as if I were a baby. I
love to be mamma’s baby still. It is
nice—nothing is so nice as that, though
the boys laugh at me for it. Well,
what can that be driving so fast? If it
should bo mamma come to see me !”
He jumped down from the gate post
and ran out into the road ; but the
vehicle that approached held only one
young man. It was the telegraph mes
senger ; they all knew him. He asked
for Professor Lawton, and stood wait
ing for his coming with a grave counte
nance. When he came he whispered
something in his ear, before he handed
him a large yellow envelope.
“It’s our telegram,” whispered Tom.-
“Now for fun.”
Professor Lawton took the message
with a countenance full of trouble. He
walked into his study, and in a minute
more Mrs. Lawton came out into the
garden, and approaching little Jack
took him by the hand and led him into
the house.
“We’ll see the gig brought out soon,”
said Tom. “It’s working finely.”
The jokers grouped about the porch.
One or two looked very much soared,
hut Tom was in high feather. They
listened, but heard no sound for a long
time. Then there arose a faint, long
drawn moan. A woman’s scream fol
lowed it. Then came silence. Tom
stopped laughing. One of the boys
oegan to cry. All felt a strange terror
come over them.
hi a moment more the study door
hurst, open and Mis. Lawton appeared.
“One of you boys—Tom Hurd, you,”
sue oried, “you are the largest—run
hr Dr. Blair.. Don’t let him lose a
moment. Run.”
’ hat has happened ?” asked Tom.
“ Don’t stop to ask questions. Go,”
cried Mrs. Lawton.
And Tom, without his hat, started
a- It was a long run to the doctor’s,
<um he was breathless when he reached
ae door, ne could not talk to the
'■oei or as he drove back in his gig ; he
could only say something dreadful must
jane happened. And when the doctor
turned into the professor’s study he
aited outside, trembling and trying in
to hear what was going on.
iur * Purkor, the assistant, came
.ound the house after awhile, and said
b® no school that after
,, • n ' that the boys must make no
j Poetical jokers had no wish to
npt '.. r) ' .They sat silently on the porch,
aurli k Btud y door reopened
W ‘e i, oc^or came out, with the pro
feor following him.
B l o ._, t lB a terrible thing,” he said,
deu' 7\ ’ fcerr d ) le. I have known snd
ten *! !i° cks J lO P r °duce death very of
<Wr was affected. Ah,
8 * r > ’ cried a dozen boys’
onc ?’ ** w °n’t you tell us what
Ridim^’*' e ! e^ram w,s from poor Jack
“Hm , U fi 10me >” said the professor,
cateVl <Jt 18 dead. He was a deli-
a i- ’ and the doctor says—”
yefWl V^•” Ba id the doctor. “Yes,
poor f e ii ! at once, didn’t he
Two Dollars Per Annum,
VOLUME IL
“ Dead !” cried the boys.
“Dead!” cried Tom Hurd. “Ob,
doctor 1 doctor! no, no, no! Save
him ! save him. ! It’s a joke—a wicked
joke. His mother is alive. I sent the
telegram. Tell him that; it will bring
him to. Tell him ! tell him !”
“ Dead people can’t be brought to,”
cried the doctor. “ Are you sneaking
the truth ?”
“ Oh, yes,” cried Tom, groveling in
the dust. “ Oh, yes. Oh, God forgive
me! Will Ibe hung? O try to save
him, doctor I”
“ Thomas Hurd,” cried the professor,
“ stand up; don’t grovel there. Do
you mean all this ? Did you really
send a lying message to a widow’s only
son to tell him she was dead?”
“ Yes, sir,” said Tom. “ Oh, lam so
sorry. I wish I was dead. Can’t some
thing be done ? He may not be quite
gone. Oh, pray, pray, try.”
“ Why did you do such a thing as
this ?” asked the doctor.
“ Only for fun,” answered Tom.
“Do you think it fun now?” asked
the doctor.
“ I’m a murderer !” said Tom. “ Oh,
hang me ! hang me !”
“ Do you think the law would allow
us to do it, doctor?” asked the profes
sor. “ I should like very much to
risk it.”
“ Please do,” said Tom, seriously.
He dropped on the steps as he spoke,
and, lying on his face, began to moan :
“I’ve killed him! I’ve killed him!
I’ve killed him !” in a way that was
terrible to hear.
The professor looked at the doctor.
He slipped back and opened the doer,
and out ran a little slender figure, that
knelt down by Tom, aud whispered ;
“ Don’t go on so, Tom ; I’m alive.”
Tom lifted up his head, and saw little
Jack Redburn, and gave a scream, and
caught him in his arms, crying :
“ Oh, he’s alive ! he’s alive ! lie’s
alive !” over and over again.
“ Yes, he’s alive,” said the professor ;
“ and, Tom, your telegram was never
sent at all. I caught Harry Pratt at
liis trick and dragged a confession from
him ; and I arranged that a message
about nothing should be sent through
the telegraph, in order that you might
see it arrive. The doctor was in the
plot, and if any one has been the victim
of a joke, it is you.”
“ But, young man,” said the doctor,
“if it had been sent, that message of
yours, it might have ended in a very
tragic way. ft is evident you don’t
know how strong a boy’s love for his
mother may be, or you would not have
fancied it a jbke to use it as a means of
torture ; and you do not know how dan
gerous such a shock might be to any
EE ,jr *° * uttu
“It was very cruel,” said Jack ; “ but
I guess you didn’t think, or you wouldn’t
have done it.”
Tom had risen, wiping bis eyes.
“ I am so thankful, that I don’t care
what happens to me,” he said. “ I de
serve what I’ve got, and I certainly
shall never play a practical joke on any
one again as long as I live!”
And Tom kept his word.
Zouaves.
In my account of the review held by
Marshal MacMahon last month I re
marked on the absence of the Zouaves.
I was m t then aware that there were no
longer any in France. Since the war
they have returned to their original du
ties, which were those of colonial
troops. The empire inported them into
France as it did the Turcos—those Se
poys of Algeria. When these corps
were introduced into the imperial
guard it became necessary to have re
serves to keep up their strength, and so
line regiments of Zouaves were brought
into French garrisons to serve as a nur
sery for the Zouaves of the guard. The
late war did a good deal to dissipate
the exaggerated prestige of those semi
oriental troops. As for the Turcos, af
ter Forbach and Woerth they were re
duced to a handful. Their European
drill and discipline made them formi
dable to the Arabs, and their desperate
valor and ferocity rendered them ugly
opponents even to regular soldiers.
But their value was greatly diminished
by the introduction of long-range rifles.
Excellent skirmishers, their cat-like
agility and speed and ferocious onset
also made them terrible in a bayonet
attack w’hen, regardless of death, they
charged home to break a line or square.
But when such charges are to be made
upon troops carrying rifles that kill at
a thousand yards, and fire six times in
a minute, the chief utility of the ha’lf
savage Turcos was gone. It was un
likely that either he or the Zouaves v.ill
again be seen figuring in a European
war. —Paris Letter.
The Real Chinaman.
Bret Harte, in describing a Chinaman
in a sketch in Scribner’s, says : “ I want
the average reader to discharge from his
mind any idea of a Chinaman that he
may have gathered from the pantomime.
He did not wear beautifully scalloped
drawers fringed with little bells—l never
met a Chinaman who did ; he did not
habitually carry his forefinger extended
before him at right angles with liis
body, nor did I ever hear him utter the
mysterious sentence, ‘Ching a ring a
ring chaw.’ nor dance under any provo
cation. He was, on the whole, a rather
grave, decorous, handsome gentleman.
His complexion, which extended all
over his head, except where his long
pig-tail grew, was like a very nice piece
of glazed brown paper muslin. His
eyes were bl ck and bright and his eye
lids set at an angle of forty-five degrees;
his nose straight and delicately formed ;
his mouth small aud his teeth white aud
clean. He wore a dark blue silk blouse,
and in the streets, on cold days, a short
jacket of astrakhan fur. He wore also
a pair of drawers of blue brocade gath
ered tightly over his calves and ankles,
offering a general sort of suggestion that
he had forgotten his trousers that morn
ing, but that, so gentlemanly were his
manners, his friends had forborne to
mention the fact to him. His manner
was urbane, al though quite serious. He
spoke French and Euglish fluently. In
brief, I doubt if you could have found
the equal of this pagan shopkeeper
among the Christian traders of San
Francisco.”
A Franch scientist claims to have
discovered an insect which makes its
home in the middle of cigars.
EASTMAN, DODGE CO., GEORGIA, THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 24, 1574.
NOTES ON ENGLAND.
Racy American Critique on English
Manners'.
Kate Field writes in her “ Republi
can notes on Eagland” in the St. Louis
Republican : “ Now it is perfectly
true that many Americans are exceed
ingly careless in their speech. They
do talk through their noses; but it is
also true that this dreadul habit is an
English inheritance and not a matter of
climate. The native American’s voice
is guttural. It was our pilgrim
fathers who brought over the wnine
known in England as ‘Suffolk sing
ing,’ which to-day, though banished
from London salons, may be heard in
the counties of Norfolk, Suffolk, Essex,
and Cambridge. If our ancestors who
named Massachusetts counties after
their old homes had good ears for mu
sic they would have left their noses be
hind them, and their descendants would
not now be twanging through life to the
disgust of England’s aristocracy. Now
nasality liss so permeated the atmos
phere of New England that its people
do not realize the affront they put upon
their own vocal organs. Yet in spite of
hereditary taint, the most musical Eug
lish in the world is spoken by cultivated
Bostonians. This fact upsets the theory
of climate; so too does the other fact
that New England produces a similarly
rich contralto singing voice of which
that consummate artist Adelaide Phil
lips, her sister Matilda Phillips, who
is now winning laurels in Italy, Annie
Louise Cary, and Antoinette Sterling
are ever notable examples. The Puri
tans are not alono to blame for the de
fects in our speech. The negro has
been our bane in more than one res
pect, and southerners drawl and flatten
their vowels because their sable nurses
did so before them. Nevertheless, the
cultured southern planter will often
speak English without the slightest ac
cent. Puritan and negro have spread
over the continent their vocal peculiar
ities, and until parents appreciate that
most excellent thing in man or woman,
a sonorous voice, and rear their children
carefully, Americans will suffer under
the imputation of being the worst
toned people.
I was first startled by the absence of
what can only be expressed by the
French word complaisance. American
politeness is more nearly modelled upon
French than English manner. The aim
of an American in decent society is to
give as little offence as possible, to say
pleasant things even at the expense of
unvarnished truth, and to place himself,
as well as those with whom he converses,
in the most agreeable light. The typi
cal Englishman indulges in no such sen
timentality. There is much more of the
brute about inm. lie makes no effort
to please, but if you please him he will
bask in that pleasure as a lizard basks
in sunshine, and once your friend can
be relied upon. He delights in chaff.
American society had rather tell a pleas
ant lie than an unpleasant truth. In
England the natural and universal im
pulse— with exceptions, be it under
stood—is to say whatever comes upper
most, especially if it be something dis
agreeable. Yet the expression is so
unconscious as to leave no poison in the
sting. The greatest grievance English
society nurses against us is what it calls
Americanisms. That forty millions of
people should dare to invent words fills
John Bull with unspeakable horror.
Our audacity in thus defiling the well
of English is only equalled by our vul
garity of tone, all Americans, according
to John Bull, speaking with a nasal
twang. “Yes, all Americans, you ex
cepted,” exclaimed a very clever and
big hearted Englishman one evening
while entertaining me at his own table,
“ all Americans have a dreadful twang.
They all talk through their noses.”
This gentleman had a very decided nasal
tone. “ Perfectly true,” chimed in one
after another, all good-naturedly, but
all in earnest.
One generation can undo the evil of
250 years. As for knowing anything
about us, apart from our always being
rich and always talking through our
noses, of course the majority of the
English upper classes do not; and when
it comes to geography! “Know any
thing of American geography ! of course
we don’t,” exclaimed a brilliant mem
ber of the commons. “ Why is it not
recorded that in the last war between
England and America our government
sent out water lor our fleets iu the
great lakes, in complete ignorance of
the fact that the water of these lakes
is fresh ? Apart from the few English
men who havo traveled in your country,
I assure you that our knowledge is con
fined to a faint perception of the exist
ence of New York and Boston. But
then we are not too well studied in any
geography. I’ll wager that before the
war with Russia few Englishman knew
where the Crimea was. Is not this a
safe wager, Lady Blank ? ”
“ I am sure it is,” lepiied our hostess;
“ even now 7don’t know where it is.”
“ Not long friuce I called cn the Duke
of Argyle, the secretary ior India,”
said a distinguised Indian to me. “ The
duke bears himself with gracious dig
nity and received me most courteously.
There was a map of India hanging up
in the room to which the duke turned,
and, pointing lo a large desert, asked
me what sea it was! This, from the
Indian secretary, struck me as amaz
ing.” I should think so. But though
the English know not one state from
another, though I have been asked
whether there were not many Indians
in the vicinity of Boston, though an in
telligent traveler like Edmund Dicey
declares that we have no singing birds,
that all Americans have long necks and
no Americans have curly hair, there is
one citr on this continent with which
every Englishman is familiar, and that
is Chicago. The great fire advertised
Chicago on the banks of the Ganges,
and gave it a European prestige that no
other American city can rival, unless
it succeeds in being totally destroyed
by some devouring element.
Rev. Dr. Cuvier writes: Say what
we may of the'rapid growth of our
American towns, the monster strides of
the British metropolis always over
whelm me. London now contains 3,-
600,000 people ! It almost equals Paris,
New York and Brooklyn combined into
one. You can drive fifteen miles on
one of its diameters. When, in my col
lege-b y days, I once went out to pay
my respects to Joanna Baillie, the emi-
dn God yf'e Yrust.
nent authoress, who lived near Hamp
stead Hill, I walked clear out of town
and over open fields. lam now stay
ing at the hospitable house of our
friend, the Rev. Newman Hall, who
resides on the same Hampstead’ Hill
in the midst of compactly-built streets!
Actors and Auditors.
A singular phase of the theatrical ex
istence is the passionate fondness
evinced by members of that calling for
attending entertainments themselves.
Apostles of most oiher professions and
trades gladly sink the shop when they
are fairly out of it. The lawyer off duty
does not lrequent the courts. The ed
itor is not continually hanging around
other offices when not confined in his
own. Doctors do not rest themselves
by visiting the patients of other doctors.
But the actor or actress, of high or low
degree, when not directly busied on the
glaring side of the footlights, is sure to
be found in the auditorium. The most
persistent theatre-goers in the world are
theatrical people.
Mrs. Chanfrau reached Chicago one
afternoon last week. She had traveled
straight through from New York, and,
after a twenty-four hours’ rest, was to
push on to San Francisco. But she was
one of McYicker’s audience that night,
and sat the play through. Her business
manager passed all of the same evening
at the Aoademy. Mr. and Mrs. Edwin
Adams arrived in that city three or four
days before that gentleman’s engage
ment was to begin. They attended the
theatres every night and matinee, and
were among the most eager and atten
tive of the spectators.
It is so always, everywhere. The wife
of a theatrical manager may be seen in
the audience night after night, month
in and month out. A shoemaker’s wife
does not follow her liege to his shop
every day. Clergymen’s wives are not
regular companions of their husbands
on pastoral calls—it might be prudent
if they were. The actor of a regular
company, when not cast for duty, can
invariably be seen in the front of the
house or that of a rival establishment.
And the puzzle of it all is, they grow as
excited, often, over the fortunes of the
players as the greenest of the auditors.
They guffaw with the comedian, scowl
with the villain, and rub away a sheep
ish tear or two at the woes of the dis
tracted maiden. One would think that
the work on the stage would seem the
dreariest of routine to them, but it
does not, else are they better actors
when looking at a play than when per
forming in it.
Notable performers never lose an op
portunity of witnessing their great co
temporaries. Booth is a frequent vis
itor to the theatre when Fechter and
AGams play. Mrs. Bowers chases after
Unarlotte Cushman every chance she
can get. Salvini was an earnest student
of Booth’s lago in Baltimore, and ap
plauded unstintedly. Indeed, the
most lavish, as well as the most dis
criminating of applause comes from
professional actors and actresses in the
audience. The numbskulls who are
always rattling their brogans and per
cussing their paws inopportunely, are
never members of the dramatic or oper
atic calling. You do not hear actors haw
haw when Joe Jefferson, in plaintive
broken English, wonders if “ dere is
anybody alive round here ? ” Clara
Louise Kellogg waits until her sister
song-bird Jhas finished her aria before
breaking in with applause.
This love of attending places of
amusement, on the part of amusement
people, is one of the best proofs of the
permanent attractiveness of the stage.
They never tire of a seat in the audi
ence, fully as they understand the un
reality of all that is enacting on the
boards. How, then, can the casual
theatre-frequenters ever weary of the
entertainments which, to them, have so
much of veritabilitv ? Critics may af
fect blase , and wonder at the verdancy
which can eternally accept the crude
sham as real. But what are they going
to do with the life-long disciples of the
calling, who make as enthusiastic spec
tators as the rawest bumpkin in the
audience ?
An Old Maid Badly Foiled.
A Plicenixville maid, quite old, be
coming anxious about her matrimonial
chances, recently concocted a plan to
deceive a young fellow as to her age.
This was the way she tried it : The
old family Bible contained a fearful re
cor l of all births, marriages, and
deaths. This volume the maiden took
to her chamber, and selecting the birth
page, she managed by dint of scratch
ing and writing to change the date of
her birth to a period eleven years later
than what it had legitimately been re
corded. Then the Bible was placed on
the sitting-room table in a conspicuous
manner. That evening came along the
lover. He soon began to finger with
the Bible pages, and finally reached the
birth record, where and when he discov
ered to his surprise, that his Angelina
was just one year younger than he. He
thought it strange, as she appeared
older. He kept his mouth shut and
continued to fumble over the pages.
Next he began reading the death list,
and made the very astonishing discov
ery that the radiant maiden, according
to the Bible, had actually been born ten
years after the decease of her father.
The young man quietly arose and bid
Angelina good-by, and now swears that
“ eternal vigilance is indeed the price
of liberty.”— Exchange.
Suicide in European Armies.
From a body of’statistics showing the
comparative prevalence of suicide in the
different European armies, it appears
that the crime is three times more com
mon among the military of England
than among civilians. In the Belgian
army, the ratio of suicides is one fourth
greater than in the British army; in the
Prussian army it is almost twice greater;
in the French army, one-third larger ;
and in the Austro-Hungarian army it
is more than twice greater. The excess
of suicide in the Prussian army is as
cribed to the extremely large number of
conscripts in proportion to the popula
tion, and to the severity of the duties
imposed ; while that of the Austi o-
Hungarian army is explained partly by
ethnological causes. Slaves, having the
oriental indifference to life, with the
western impatience of grievances, are
more disposed to suicide than Indo-
European races.
TROTTING TIME.
Uoldsmitli Maid’s Recent Unpreceden
ted Achievements.
The extraordinary trotting reoord
made by Goldsmith Maid at Mystio
Park, Boston, on the second inst., is
worthy of more than passing notice, for it
marks an era memorable in the history
of the American trotting turf. Thirty
years ago, “two-forty on the plank
road” was supposed to denote a trot
ting horse of more than ordinary speed,
and when, in 1849, Lady Suffolk trotted
a mile heat under saddle on the Cam
bridge oourse, Boston, in 2:26, against
Mao and Gray Eagle, the acme of speed
was then supposed to have been
reached. Seven years later, Flora Tem
ple, in the hands of the great American
horseman, Hiram Woodruff, reduced
the record to 2:244, made in a race
against Tacon on the Union course,
Sept. 4, 1856, the latter going under
saddle and Flora in harness. For years
this record remained unequaled, but
Flora Temple herself subsequently re
duced it to 2:23|, 2:22, and 2:19f,
the latter time being mado at Kalama
zoo, on Oct. 15, 1859. Dexter, Robert
Bonner’s famous horse, was the first to
beat this record, which he did in his
memorable match against time, when
his then owner, George Alley, backed
him to beat 2:19 under saddle, with
three trials, at the odds of $5,000 to
SIO,OOO. The contest took place on
Oct. 10, 1865, Dexter winning in
2:18 1-5, in the hands of John Murphy,
who rode him. In 1865, at Buffalo,
Dexter, trotting against his time of
2:18 1-5, under the saddle, placed 2:18
on the record, and two years later, over
the same course, on August 14, 1867, in
harness, made his fastest and most
memorable record of 2:17|-. Immedi
ately after the great performance he
passed into Mr. Bonner’s possession,
who withdrew him from the turf. At
the time of his retirement Dexter was
only nine years old, had not attained
the full development of his wonderful
speed, and if retained in regular train
ing would undoubtedly have reduced
the trotting record far below anything
that has yet been seen. On his abdica
tion Goldsmith Maid assumed the va
cant throne, and has clearly shown her
undoubted right to the position, for on
the Cold Spring course, Milwaukee, on
Sept. 6,1871, lour years after Dexter’s
record had been made, she trotted a
second heat in 2:17, or a quarter of a
second faster than the renowned son of
Hambletonian. She was thon fourteen
ye: rs old, and it is a striking proof of
the fact that trotting horses do not at
tain the full development of their speed
and powers of endurance that she has
since continued to trot faster every
year. On June 27, 1872, Goldsmith
Maid made the record of 2:lGf, driven
by W. H. Doble, (the father of Budd
Doble, the trainer of the mare) at Mys
tic Park, Boston, in a second heat. Un
til the California horse Occident, at
Sacramento, on Sept. 17, 1873, repeated
the great feat, this remained unequaled.
This year, however, this famous mare
has surpassed herself, for at Buffalo, on
Aug. 7, in trotting against her own best
time, in a second heat she placed
on the record ; five days later, on Aug.
12, at Rochester, she trotted a second
heat against Judge Fullerton and Amer
ican Girl in 2-14|; and on Wednesday,
Sept. 2, at Mystic Park, Boston, for a
special purse of $2,500. offered for her
to beat her own record of 2:14,| she
trotted a second trial of one mile in
2:14, amid the cheers of the assembled
thousands. How low she is destined to
reduce the trotting record it is unsafe
to predict, for she accomplishes her con
secutive triumphs so easily as to lead to
the conviction that she has a power of
speed still in reserve, to be exhibited
whenever occasion requires.— New York
Tribune.
PREPAID POSTAGE.
The Papers that Burden the Mails to be
Stamped in Bulk.
During the last days of the last ses
sion of congress was passed a law au
thorizing the prepayment of postage on
newspapers and other publications,
particularly periodicals, upon some
simple system to be devised by the
post-office department. In order to ex
pedite matters, the yostmaster-general
was speedily directed to prepare some
plan. The work was placed in the
hands of Third-Assistant Postmaster-
General Barbour, with full authority,
subject only to the revision of tie post
master-general. Gen. Barbour at once
set to work and puzzled himself for
some time before he devised a plan,
which he has now partially arranged.
While the system is completed, ail the
details are not yet finished. New
stamps have yet to be devised. The
system he has devised is simple. It
provides for the preparation of receipt
books by the department for each pub
lisher of a newspaper or periodical.
The form of receipt at the postoffice
will be something as follows :
(Name of newspaper.) No.—
Date. v >- ew York,
No, — Received—dollars and
Amount — c ts. postage on—lbs
newspaper publica
’ stamps. : tions at 2 cents per lb.
Postmaster.
The receipt-book will be retained at
the postoffice, where the papers will be
weighed. The stubs of the receipt
book will serve as memoranda to the
postoffice of the sums paid, from which
returns to the general department will
be made. The stamping of papers in
bulk will not require more than four
stamps of different denominations to
make up the amount of postage paid
by the publishers on any package,
whatever that amount may be. Even
on a ton of newspaper matter, on which
the postage will be S4O, only the four
stamps will be required to make up the
amount of postage paid. This stamp
system has been devised, as the act of
congress requires the use of adhesive
stamps. The stamps will be affixed to
the stub of the receipts by the post
office clerk and then cancelled. Thus
the publishers will be saved the trouble
of buying and affixing stamps. After
the law goes into effect he will simply
take his receipts and hold them as
evidence that the postage was paid,
Gen. Barbour expects to save by this
system of payment thousands of dollars
to the treasury department every year,
besides saving the department and pub
lishers much labor. He has exhibited |
Payable in Advance,
NUMBER 34.
the plan to Postmaster-General Jewell,
who approves it in every respect. When
the details are completed a circular
will be issued by the department ex
plaining the system, copies of which
will be forwarded to the newspaper and
publishing houses and to the 4,000 post
masters throughout the states, and on
the Ist of Jnnury next the change will
be made —New York World.
Corn Raw and Cooked.
The time will soon come when farmers
will want to begin to fatten stock for the
fall and winter market. The object will
be to turn a part of the crops of the sea
son at least in this w ay. The question
that comes up for consideration is, How
shall this be done to the greatest profit?
Take, lor instance, some facts that have
been given, setting forth experiments
that have been made to show that the
question is not only shall we turn our
corn into pork, but how shall the corn
be fed to the greatest advantage? Shall
it be fed whole, or ground, or cooked?
Experiments have been made when ev
erything has been equalized to show
the comparative value of com fed raw
and cooked, whole and ground ; and in
one case the result was that five bushels
of whole corn made forty-seven and
three-fourths pounds of pork; five bush
els ground (less toll), wet with water,
made fifty-eight and one-half pounds ;
and the same amount of meal boiled
and fed cold made eighty-three and one
half pounds. In the * first case the
amount of the corn fed equaled the
value of the pork when it was fattened,
and in the last the pork equaled the
amount of corn fed and gave a profit of
one dollar a bushel in addition. Any
one can see that the profit here came
from the boiling of the meal; and that
if, feeding the whole raw, grain would
give a profit as it usually does, this
would be greatly increased by cooking.
In another experiment ten bushels of
corh on the cob fed on the ground made
twenty-niDe and one-half pounds of pork.
The same amount shelled and coarsely
ground and cooked made sixty-four
pounds. These facts are given officially
and can be relied on, and the results here
stated should be considered and remem
bered, and their instruction applied.
Another experiment was tried under dif
ferent circumstances from those men
tioned above, but a like result was se
cured. The raw corn fed whole gave a
return of SI.OB per bushel, the cooked
meal that of $1.65 per bushel.
The results, like the above, of experi
ments might be given to almost any ox
tent, but enough has been said to show
the direction in which profit lies for the
farmer if he will take it.
The machinery for cooking for stock is
simple, and the work of doing it is light.
A little preparation in advance made at
oild spells will make it convenient to
cook the daily rations for stock as it is
needed. We have done this ourselves
with no particular hindrance to our other
work, and have been abundantly satisfied
with results. If one would feed his
grain to the greatest profit, no doubt it
should be done in this way. —Ohio
Farmer.
A Resort for Pilgrims.
A correspondent of the Cleveland
Herald writes : “ Kerbella is a great
resort for pilgrims from Persia and In
dia. These Mahometans are all of the
Sheeak sect, who revere the memory of
Ali almost as much as the prophet him
self. In this place are two very sacred
shrines of Abbas and of Etaessein,
nephews or grandsons of Mahomet, who
are buried here and worshiped as
saints. Thousands of the devout come
here to die as the Hindoos resort to
Benares, their sacred city, to drown
themselves in the Ganges. The two
mosques containing the ashes of these
saints are very beautiful. I could only
see the ouside, as no ‘ dog of an unbe
liever’ is ever permitted to enter the
sacred precincts. The mosque of Abbas
has an immense dome, and one of its
minarets entirely covered with plates of
burnished gold. The dome and mina
rets of the other mosque are beautifully
ornamented with glazed tiles of various
colors, arranged in arabesque designs,
and passages from the Koran. No
mosque in Cairo, Damascus, or Con
stantinople will compare with these in
richness of exterior decoration, From
the number of devotees buried at Ker
bella the soil is full of human bones.
Pilgrims carry away as relics small
pieces of the ‘clay of the saints,’ upon
which they rest their foreheads in say
ing their prayers.”
Marrying for a Bishopric. .
The manner in which Dr. Sumner,
late Bishop of Winchester, proved his
fitness for the Episcopate reminds one
of American civil service requirements.
After graduating at Cambridge, he was
made tutor to the y< ung Marquis of
Conyngliam. While traveling in Swit
zerland, the pupil fell in love with a
beautiful Swiss lady who had neither
money nor rank. The watchful tutor
informed his pupil’s parents of the
perils to which he was exposed. They
promised the tutor that if he would
marry the dangerous siren himself they
would not forget it. Dr. Sumner saw
bis opportunity, and Miss Mannoir
speedily became Mrs. Sumner. Lord
Convngham kept his word. Dr. Sum
ner was introduced to the Prince Re
gent, received an appointment in his
househ 1 ■>, was subsequently made
bishop of Llandaff and afterwards of
Winchester. If the lovely Swiss was
not allowed to wear a coronet she had
the grood fortune to share and income of
865,000 a year and the homage paid to
an ecclesisastical ‘lord. From this
story it. may be inferred that promotion
in the English church sometimes goes
by favor.
—A gentleman of Lake George, after
waving his handkerchief for half an
hour or more at an unknown ladv,
whom he discovered at a distant point
on the shore, was encouraged by a
warm response to his signals to ap
proach his charmer. Imagine bis feel
ings, when on drawing Dearer be saw
that it was his own dear wife whom he
had left at the hotel but a short time
before. “ Why, how remarkable we
should have recognized each other at
such a distance?” exclaimed both in. the
same breath ; and then they changed |
the subjeot.
EASTMAN TlMj*
RATES OF ADVERTISING:
bpagk, 1 id. S in. ®m. IS m.
L
One square $4 00 $ 7 00* $ 1000 $ 15 00
Two squares 625 12 0O; 18 00 25 00
Four squares ......... 975 19 001 28 00 39 (J#
One-fourth coU 11 50 22 60| 34 00 43 0V
Oue-half c 01... 20 00 32 50] 55 00 80 60
One column .. ..I 35 to tvo 00 80 Qoj 130 00
Advertisements inserted at the rate of $1.50 per
square for the first insertion, and 75 cents for each
subsequent one. Ten lines or leas constitute a
square.
Professional cards, $15.00 per annum; for six
months, $16.00, in advance.
FACTS AND FANCIES.
—A Pennsylvania baby is said to have
inherited the eyes and nose of his
father but the cheek of his uncle, who
is an insurance agent.
Greatness is like a laced coat from
Monmouth street, which fortune lends
us for a day to wear; to-morrow puts it
on another’s back. —Fir Mine/.
—The wicked flea. “It ain’t so much
the biting, if only the plaguey thing
wouldn’t keep getting up and sitting
down all the time.” Exactly.
—Of a miserly man who died of soft
ening of the brain, a local paper said:
“ His head gave way, but liis hand
never did. His brain softened, but
his heart couldn’t.”
—“ See,” said a sorrqwing wife, “ how
peaceful the cat and dog are.” “ Yes,”
said the petulant husband, “but just
tie them together and then see how the
fur will fly.”
—“Can you do the landlord in the
‘Lady of Lyons?’” said a manager to
a seedly actor. “I should think I
might,” was the answer, “I have done
a great many landlords.”
—Boys will be boys. At Alton, 111.,
a preacher asked all Suunay-sehool
scholars to stand up who intend© I to
visit the wicked, soul-destroying cir
cus. All but a lame girl, stood up.
—An enterprising reporter in Arkan
sas, who was lately sentenced to the
state prison for horse stealing, applied
to his employers to be continued on the
journal as penitentiary correspondent.
—The Detroit Free Press man has
just returned from Saratoga. He says;
“ The Saratoga belles merely taste food
at the table, but fee the waiters to
bring a square meal up the back
stairs.”
—A “ three-card monte” expert is re
ported to have offered the directors of
the Union Pacific railroad a bonus of
SIQ,OOO per annum for the exclusive
right to play his little gamo in their
sleeping cars.
—Little Johnnie is dead, but beforo
his spirit was wafted to the angels ho
requested that a watermelon vine might
be allowed to wander at will over his
green grave, that it might be a warning
to future generations.
—“ Pa, who is ‘ Many Voters ? ” asked
a young hopeful of his sire. “Don’t
know him, Imv son ; why ?” “ Cos I
saw you signin’ his name to that letter
you got the other night askin’ you to
run for alderman.” “ Sh-h-h, my son,
here’s a nickel; go and get some candy.”
—A Miss Raikstraw, of St. Oswald s
Grove, Manchester, has recovered £IOO
breach of promised, mages from Joseph
C. Nottingham, a Portsmouth engineer.
This is the sort of thing Joseph used to
send lier during liis five years’ court
ship :
“ I ask not if the world unfold
A fairer form than thine,
Tresses more rich in glowing gold,
And oyos of a sweeter shine.
It is enough for me to know
Thou, too, art fair to sight ;
That thou hast locks of golden glow,
And eyes of playful light.”
—lt now requires $l2O to buy a sty •
lish French night-dress, such as an
aristocratic lady goes to bed in, and
the man who is mean enough to toss
down seventy-five dollars and tell his
wife to make that do can never secure
a seoond wife.
—A Kentucky crusader confessed the
other day that she had kissed sixteen
men, and thus drawn them from the in
toxicating bowl. She gave the names
of the men, however, and their wives
are now inquiring with much anxiety
whether whisky drinking is as bad as it
is generally supposed to be.
—The pounding of the stomach for
the cure of dyspepsia was the cause of
a good joke the other day. Two men
were describing what they had done to
cure themselves. “Do you knead your
stomach?” “I—l—couldn’t get along
without it!” responded the other, in
the last stage of astonishment.
—ln one of the Cape towns a young
scholar, the first day of school, was
asked her name by the teacher, and re
plied. Her father’s name was the next
question, and she did not know his first
name. The teacher then asked her,
“What does your mother call him?”
“You Jackass,” said the child.
—A miss, upon whose flaxen eitrls
the suns of fourteen summers had shed
their fervor, came home the other after
noon, weeping as if her heart would
break, and meeting a playmate, ex
claimed, in a paroxysm of grief, “O,
Dora, we were engaged to be married,
and Charley’s got the measles ! ”
—A lady sitting in her parlor, and en
gaged in the dreamy contemplation of
the moustache of the young gentleman
who was to escort her and her sister to
a musical festival, was suddenly awak
ened by an ominous whisper in a juven
ile voice at the door, “ You’ve got
Ann’s teeth, and she wants ’em.”
—A Detroit young woman tried to be
aristocratic, and did not look at the
money that she gave to a horse-car con
ductor, but he meekly gave her back
the lozenge on which was written, * 111
never cease to love thee,” and said that
he was an orphan with five little broth
ers to support, and must be excused.
—Argue not with a man whom you
know to be of an obstinate temper, for
when he is once contradicted his mind
is barred against all light and informa
tion ; argument, though ever so well
grounded, provokes him, and makes
him even afraid to be convicted of the
truth.
—The cash sales of the grange co-op
erative store at Los Angeles, Cal.,
amounted to over SIO,OOO the first
month. They act as middlemen for all
farmers, both buying and selling. A
new paper mill is to be started, the cap
ital to be furnished by the Grangers,
and the water power donated by the
city.
—A story is told of a New 5 ork re
porter who, fearful that he might not
get the address which was to be deliv
ered at the funeral of a prominent cit
izen, knelt beside the preacher while he
was praying, abstracted the manuscript
from the latter’s rear pocket, and forth
with carried it off. The clergyman,
thinking his paper had been lost, deliv
ered himself extemporaneously, but
the next morning discovered his error,
his written address being printed in full
incite newspaper.