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DEVOTED TQ NEWS* PQMTWS, LITERATURE,, AGRICULTURE AND GENERAL PRQGREEN-’-*I.NDEPENDENT IN ALL TMINGN
VOL. X.
fftttilroari Schedule.
Arrival aud Departure of Trains.
Arrival o! Trains at 4*i*eenos*
bora’ 3>ej>ot.
DAY PASSENGER TRAIN.
From Atlanta, . . 11:12 A. M.
From Augusta, . . 11:58 A. M.
NIGHT PASSENGER TRAIN.
From Atlanta • . . B:i>3 A. M.
From Augusta, . . . 1:14 A. M.
May 29 n. 11. KING, Agent.
Oeorgia HEailroat!.
Day Passenger Train.
Leave Augusta, 8.45, a. m.
Leave Atlanta, 7:00, a. m.
Arrive at Atlanta, .6:46, p. m.
Arrive at Augusta, % 8:80, p. m.
Night Passenger Train.
Leave Augusta, 8:15, p. m.
Leave Atlanta, 10:80, p. m
Arrive at Atlanta, 6:25, a. m.
Arrive at Augusta, 8.T5, a. m.
ACCOMMODATION TRAIN.
Leaves Atlanta, 5:00 p. m.
Leaves Stone Mountain, . 6:45 a. i-
Arrives Atlanta, 8:00 a m.
Arrives Stone Mountain, 6:16 p. m.
S. K. JOHNSON, Sup’t,
Western & Atlantic U I?
AND ITS CONNECTIONS.
—“K ENNE SA W ROUT E.”—
The following Schedule takes effect May
23d, 1875:
NORTHWARD.
No 1. No 3. No 11.
Lv Atlanta, 4 20pm 7 00am 380 pm
Ar Cartersville, 6 14pm 9 22am 7 19pm
Ar Kingston, 6 42pm 9 56am 8 21pm
Ar Dalton, 8 24pm 11 54am 11 18pm
Ar Chattanooga,lo 25pm 1,66 pm
SO UTHWARD.
No 2. No 4. No 12.
Lv Chattanooga, 4 00pm 5 00am
Ar Dalton, 6 41pm 7 01am 1 00am
Ar Kingston. 7 38pm 9 07am 4 19am
Ar Cartersville, 8 12pm 9 42am 5 18aro
Ar Atlanta, 10 15pm 12 06m 9 30am
Pullman Palace Cars run on Nos. 1 and
2, between New Orleans and Baltimore.
Pullman Palace Cars run on Nos. 1 and
8, between Atlanta and Nashville.
Pullman Palace Cars run on Nos. 3 and
2, between Louisville and Atlanta.
JggTNo change of cars between New
Orleans, Mobile, Montgomery, Atlanta and
Baltimore, and only one change to New
York.
Passengers leaving Atlanta at 4:10 pm
arrive in New York the second afternoon
thereafter at4:oopm.
Excursion Tickets to the Virginia Springs
ant! various Summer Resorts will be on sale
in New Orleans, Mobile, Montgomery, Co
lumbus, Macon, Savannah, Augusta and
Atlanta,at greatly reduced rates Ist of June.
Parties desiring a whole car through to
the Virginia Springs or to Baltimore,
should address the undersigned.
Parties contemplating traveling should
send for a copy of the Kennesaw Route Ga
xette, containing schedules, etc.
for Tioket3 via “ Kennesaw
Route.” B. W. WRKNN,
Scn’l Pass, and Ticket Agent, Atlanta. Ga
MASONIC.
Hun Hitrimo I.oiSge. No, SI,
GREENESBORO', GA.
(Regular Meetings—First* . Wednesday
night of each month.
M. MAR KAV ALTER, Sec’y.
<wreenesloro’ It, A, C„ IVo, SST
GREENESBORO’, GA.
Regular meeting —Third Friday night of
each month. 0. C. NORTON, See y.
Union Lodge, \o. 2WB,
UNION POINT, Ga.,
Meets regularly the 2d and 4th Thursday
day evenings in each month.
W. 0. MITCHELL, Sec’y
Feb. 4, 1875—tf
M (!) 0 Jf.
V 55 *#s ■ \3,t
Cretiie Lmlgt‘, \ti. IS, I OOF.
GREENESBORO', GA., :
Meets regularly every Monday niglit
Wm. t. doster, n. g.
D. S. Holt, R S.
I’Si
Lreenesborough Lodge, Ao.
.120, Independent Order Good Templars,
meets at Odd Fellow’s Hall, on 2d and 4th
Friday nights in each month.
J. HENRY WOOD, W. C.
G. W. Jlillek, Sec’y.
Special Notice.
TIIE Stockholders of the Greene County
Fair Association are hereby personally no
tified that unless they pay up their pro
rata share of an execution I hold against
said Association, I will be forced to havo
executions issued against them severally,
for their proportional parts of said claim.
Capt. W M Weaver is authorized to re
ceive and recoil”, for moneys so paid,
febietf JAS N ARMOR
HO n Tear in iTuiiK'f.
J. Si. I*AHI4. - - Prwprieior.
n. .Tl. WKAVKK, - - lfclifOf.
Laws Bclntiill 4o Xeusimpcr
and Ar*
rinra^cs.
1. Subscribers who do, not give express
notice to the contrary,'are' considered
wishing to continue theirtsubscription.
2. If subscribers order tiie discontinuance
of their periodicals, the publishers' may
continue to send them until all arrear
ages are paid.
3. If subscribers neglect or refuse to take
their periodicals from the office to winch
they are directed, thfey are held respon
sible until they have settled their bills
• and ordered them discontinued,
4. If subscribers move to other places
without notifying publishers, and the
papers are sent to former direction,
they are held responsible.
5. The Courts have decided that “refusing
to take periodicals from the office, or
removing aud leaving them uncalled
for, is prima facie evidence of inten
tional fraud."
6. Any person who receives a newspaper
and makes use of it,whether he has or
dered it or not, is held in law to be a
subscriber.
7. If subscribers pay in advance, they are'
bound to give notice to the publisher,
at the end of their time, if they do no}
wish to continue taking it; other
wise the publisher is authorized to send
it on, and the subscriber will bn respon
sible until an express notice, with pay
ment of all arrearages, is sent to the
publisher.
CORNER.
THIS BKOKGK ItOLL.
Blue eyes, with their long, dark lashes
Half veiled in a tearful mist,
And 0, such a pitiful quiver
On the sweet little mouth I kissed ;
’Twas only a childish sorrow,
And yet how keen was the smart,
Ag she held up her precious dqjly..
Broken—the'pride of her heart;
In my arms I folded her closely
As I whispered in confident smile,
“.Don’t-owy, Uoar. Tißr.tti hftvi it mendem"
But her tears fell faster the while,
And she sobbed, 01, thank you, dear
auntie,
But that won’t do, for, you see,
If you mended it ever so nicely
It. would always be patched up to me J"
She had spoken, that sorrowful baby,
And deeper truth than she knew,
And I thought, (with my head on her
Shoulder,)
Of its meanings as sad as true ;
I thought of the shattered treasures
We prize in matuver years,
Of the hopes, the loves, and the friendships
We mourn with such bitter tears.
I thought how w.e gathered the fragments
With labor as fond as ’twas vain,
Just to find that the marks of the mending
Could change all our pleasures to pain ;
Just to learn that the patched up treasure
Could never be precious again ,
And I sighed as I thought of the heart
aches
Our broken dolls left in their train
Ah me ! what a dismal story
Our lives would tell at the best,
If, content with our fair, frail playthings,
We made them our stay or our rest ;
If we looked not above for our treasures,
Unshadowed by tune or decay ;
And this is the lesson our Father
Is teaching us day by day!
Two Hensons.
“Here's a boy down hero that
wants to lick me!” exclaimed a boot
black as he approached a policeman
on Griswold street yesterday.
“He does, eb? What for?”
“Says I called him names, but I
didn’t.”
“Are you afraid of him?”
“No, not exactly; but I don't
want to fight. One reason is I
promised my dying mother I would
n’t and the other reason is cause
he’s bigger’n I am.
—A student while undergoing his
examination was asked what was the
action of disinfectants, and replied:
“ They smell so badly that the people
open tho windows, and fresh air gets
in.”
—An old lady recently directed the
attention of her husband to a pair of
twins, remarking, as she did so, “ How
much these two children do look aiike,
especially the one this way!”
—The following legend is inscribed
on the front of a butcher’s shop in
Pennsylvania : Kasli padc for littol
halves not mourn (wo iln-e p.ln ”
GREENESBORO’, GA., THURSDAY, AUGUST 26, 1875.
oMamT'
[for the herald.]
IVIIKEItN I Wf UI II AXD
lit-.•*ixtsni\(
BY RET. J. 4V. TALLEY.
Walker's church, or meeting house,
once stood about two miles south of
Greenosboro’. The first of the year
1806, a commodious frame building
having superceded the original struc
ture, the old house was converted into
a country school-house. At that time
it was in what was known as Apalachee
Circuit of the South'Carolina Confer
ence, and Revs. Joseph Tarpley and
Lovick Pierce were the preachers in
charge. When Walker’s church was
organized, I have no means of knowing,
but, the fallowing cironmstances lead
me to believe, that it must have been
between the years 1790 and 1800, I
was born on the 6th day of December,
1800, about oue mi!o south of Greenes
boro’. My parents were members of
Walker’s church. My father died in
1803, and,in 1805, my mother married
Mr. John Walker, son of (Japt. Wil
liam Walker, who was the leading
spirit in the church and from whom it
took its name. Sbon after my mother’s
marriage to John AValker, they moved
to a farm about a half mile from the
church, and I was sent to school in the
old log building' which had formerly
been used as the church. This was in
1800. Capt. Wm. Walker, I bolievo,
was the ilrst class leader at Walker’s
church. As ho was a man of consid
erable prominence, it may not be amiss
to give some incidents connected with
his eventful life. At the opening of
the Revolutionary War, in 1776, he
was living in Lincoln Cos., Georgia,
near Little River, hut for prudential
reasons moved his iauniy to the Cal
houn neighborhood in South Carolina
that Irish community, of which they
wer. ti .e extracts —cud after arrang
ing for their comfort, joiued the Whig
arm;- :--:id ;.-m- ,n what was known as
the Northern i>. Hon. Ou one occa
sion,while on a -eouqhis little baud was
overpowered by the British and Indi
ans —not, however, until more than
double their number of assailants, had
been made to bite the dust , and their
last rounds of ammunition were in their
faithful rifles, did they capitulate to the
British, thus saving their scalps from
the ruthless ludiau tomahawk. The
prisoners, after their surrender, woro
given to the luuians as slaves. Capt.
Walker was carried near the Northern
Lakes, and given to a woman to supply
the place of a lost son. There he lived
for eighteen months, making himself
useful and gradually gaining the confi
dence of all the Indians with whom he
had intercourse. After waiting long
and anxiously, an opportunity for
cape presented itself, aud after travel
ing under the guidance of a native for
weary days through a trackless forest,
subsisting on roots and berries, he
reached the American camp. For his
bravery and fidelity,he was promoted to
a captaincy, and, as such, remained in
Washington’s army,suffering privations
and enduring hardships, until the
mother country acknowledged that tho
thirteen colonies were sovereign and
independent. After the struggle for
independence was over, he and his war
scarred comrades sought their homes.
Soon after his return to the bosom of
his family, he moved back to his
former home in Lincoln county, Ga-,
and,not a great while thereafter .settled
ia Greene and located about one mile
northeast of the site where Walker’s
church was afterwards erected. I
have detailed these events in his life, as
they were fixed in my memory, while
in youth, with breathless attention, I
listened to the rehearsal of his toils and
clangers —his hairbreadth escapes and
his victories. Youthful memory may
have been to some extent unfuithiul to
the trust reposed, but when my mind
wanders away back through the mist of
years, the scenes and recollections of
those youthful days rise up now with
all the vividness of yesterday
From the circumstances related, I
conclude that Walker's church was or
ganized not long after the adoption of \
the Federal Constitution.
Among its early ministers (itinerant I
and local) the following are most prom- j
inent in my memory: Hope Hull !
Josiah Rand! Beniamin Blanton. I
Nalley, Kcdwifio, Isaac Smith, Thos.
fiimford,James Rufeaell, John Howard,
Joseph Tarpley and Lovio Pierce. AH
faithful.aud zealous workers in the
vineyard of the Lord.
01 its early membership, I remem
ber old Robert Martin and his wife, bis
son Robert and wife (father and son
both preachers or exhorters). Col. Geo.
AY. Foster, wife and daughter Nancy;
Thom ns Callier ahd family, Robert
McKeen’s family, Mrs. Brown, the
Leonards, Williamsons,. Boydkins,
Wards, Jolinsobs and-WkgflelA. The
church was large and the congregation
numerous, but various causes—as the
organization of other churches, the tide
of emigration and death —conspired in
the ruu of years to reduce the member
ship, as well as the congregation. The
church being inconveniently located for
those of its members who remained, it
became necessary to remove it to a more
eligible locality; and accordingly it was,
torn down and rebuilt, at its present
site, about five miles south of where it
originally stood.
An event which transpired in one of
the older and most influential families
connected with AValker’s church, re
sulted greatly in advancing the inter
ests of Methodism in Georgia. I refer
to the marriage of Rev. Lovio Pierce,
(an itinerant Methodist preacher.) to
the accomplished and lovely Miss
Naney Foster, only daughter of Col.
Geo. W. Foster. Dr. Pierce’s marriage
alliance with this old and honorable
family brought him in contact with
many individuals who stood aloof from
the church, and stiffened their necks
and hardened their hearts against the
truths of religion. Improving the op
portunity thus presented, he, by bis
piety and the clearness and orcc of his
preaching, won many of them to the
church and secured to biuret f the title
of the -Patriarch of Me' odism in
Georgia. From "tbit dace, Georgia be
came the home of Rev. Lovio Pierce
(who by birth is a Carolinian). To the
Methodist church and the interests of
his adopted State he has devoted a life
of more abundant labors as a minister
of the Lord Jesus, than any man in
the Church cr State. He still lives to
see many of his early hopes realized, in
the elevation of the standard of female
education and collegiate education sanc
tified to the cause of Christ.
After Walker’s church was moved to
its present site Ho which wa have al
ready alluded), which was about
182 Uor ’2l, it entered,as it were.upon
anew lease of life—its membership
again multiplied, and, within a year or
two, over a hundred names appeared on'
the church book. Again similar causes ,
as before, produced a diminution in its
membership, and for several years it
was without a regular pastor, but of
hie years it lias prospered wonderfully.
A few years ago the old building, full
of precious memories, was stripped to
its frame and remodeled and finished
off in a neat and comfortable style. Tt
now has a large membership and a
flourishing Sabbath School.
After many years of wanderings, I
revisited the sacred spot —the church
of niy sainted mother and sister and
the grave of my eldest brother, Rev.
Wm, Talley—with crowding recollec
tions of “auld lafrg syne,” on the fourth
Sunday in July, and preached to many
of the grand and great-grand-children
of its sainted dead ; but, alas ! few of
my old friends remain—they have gone
to join the Church of the first born in
Heaven
An Unfailing Sign,
The editor of the Gallatin (Tenn.)
Examiner coatribututes the following
to the large stock of weather signs:
“For more than tweuty-five years we
bave known Ja sign by which to deter
mine the probability of rain for that day,
which we have not seen fail in a single
instance, and we publish it that others
may verify its certainty, if they choose.
Go out early in the morning, in the
spring, summer and fall, and if the
earth and field spiders have, over-night,
woven their fresh webs over the grass,
and about tho bushes and fences, set it
down for a fair day, even ’fit looks like
the rain will pour down in five minutes.
The instinct of the spiders never fools
them. They are wiser and surer than
General Myers ami all of his calculations
of probabilities. A knowledge cf this
fact may be a sure guide to the farmer
as to his day’s work.”
MISCELLANEOUS.
Xolcst oYt rii .n in Virginia.
We turned aside from our path
for a space, to visit an object of
some curiosity;, which is one of tire
“lions” of “tho Eastern Shore’”—•
This is an ancient vault, belonging
to a member of the.“Custis” family,
a branch of tho same stock with
which Washington intermarried.
It lies upon a fine old farmstead,
looking out upon “the Bay,” and
occupies the centre of'a large field,
the only prominent object, shelter
ed by some old tress. This vault’
is of white marble, elaborately carv
ed in London, in a state of partial
dilapidation. The curious feature
about it consists in its inscription,
which runs thus A
-$| f ♦ //#* 1 * 11* H. ■ ■ 4
“Under tins npyblf .tomb lies the
bodv of the
llon. JOHN CUSTIS, E^q,, , ,
of the'City of Wiuiamsourg, and
Parish 'bf'Burthh; formerly of
Hungar'fe PaVih,”bn fhb’ Eastern
Shore 4f Virgirfta, 1 And County 'of
Northampton; aged?! years’, and
xjel lived but seven which pas
the space of time he kept a Bache
lor’s HoMfc at Arlington, on the
Eastern S%oro-of Virginia.’*
This inscription, we are told by
another, on the opposite side, was
put on the tomb by bis own posi
tive orders. The gist of it, as our
lady readers writ be pleased to per
ceive, consists in the lines we have
italicised; the force of which will be
better felt and understood from the
additional fact, which doe3 not ap
pear, that this bachelor, who lived
only in his bachelor condition, was
o.r.iualhj marrred three times. His
experience, if we are to believe his
epitaph, was greatly adverse to the
idea of any happiness in the mar-
riage state; yet how strange that ho
should have 'ventured thrice upon
it! Tho natural conclusion is, that
Hon. John Custis'was a singularly
just and conscientious man, who,
unwilling to do the sex any wrong
by a premature judgment, gave
them a full and fair trial', at the ex
pense of his own happiness, and
pronounced judgment only after his
repeated experiments. Tradition
has preserved some anecdotes of the
sort of experience which he enjoyed
in.the marriage state, "ohc of which
I will relate. It appears that he
was driving out in his aT.cient
coach with one of his wives—and to
do bim justice we must assuro the
reader that ho had but one at a
time—and iu the neighborhood of
tho very spot to which wc Ourselves
are tending—Cape Charles. A
matrimonial discussion ensued be-
tivoon the pair, which warmed as
they proceeded; Thb lord grew
angry, the lady vociferous.'
“It was the diamond,” said one
—and “I insist,” quoth tho other
“that it was tho club.”
“You * ill’drive mo mad!” ciiel
John Custis.
“I should call that admirable
driving 1 ” retorted the wife,
“By !” he cxciairhed, “if
you say another word, I will drive
down into 'the sea!” They were
evea then upon tho beach.
“Another word!” screamed the
lady. “Drivo where you please!”
she added. “Into tho sea—l can
go as deep a3 you dare go, any
day!”
He became furious,* took her at
her word, and drove tho horses and
chariot into the ocelin. They be
gan to swim: Ho held in, looked
into her face, and she laughed in
his.
“Why do you stop?” she de
manded, excitingly, not a whit
alarmed.
“You are ti devil'” he exclaimed,
flinging the hor3e3 about, and mak
ing for the shore with a’! expedi
tion.
“Fooh' pOoh!” laughed his tor
mentor, “Learn from this fact!
that there is no place where vou*
dare to go, whore I dare not. ao
company you.” q. ■ . ;
‘■Even to !”
“The only exception,” she an
swered, with a chuckle; “there; my
dear,l leave you,”
She had conquered.
He never dr-ovo in at Cape
Charles again, but groaned with
the recollection of the seven years’
bachelor life at Arlington.—[Old
Paper.
fifi’Oiui aitii Statesmanlike.
Senator Booth,’’ of California,
made his opening speech in’ the
campaign in that State, a fqw even
ings since, in San Francisco, be
fore an immense audience. After
,0
a long discussion of local issues, be
clos.ed with this eloquent allusion
to National questions;
“The wound heals slowly that is
often chafed. THat would he a
dUice itiuqn4 iu>atir, history wlieir
would strike dowir tAeVy party tie
and party name which perpetuates
a,war memory, and bring the peo
ple together, who are 'willing., to
forget, in a solid and' impenetrable
phalapx. “The American . people j
was the real hero.of the war,” and I
must also bo the apostle of peace
and reunion. Why should they
not coino together? Summer would
remove the names of battles from i
flags because they wero remem
brances of civil war — why can Wei
not take the names from ourpoEtk:
cal banners, which aro also remind
ers? There comes a time when,
the instinct of sentiments is a true) :
guide than cold philosophy or caku-j
lating prudence. But they tell us |
that a great many rebel generals
have been elected to the next Con
gress. Why should they not be 7
When tho Government amnestied
them did it mean to say, “We ro
store your rights, but you shall
never enjoy them?” When they
take their seai3 id Congress it will
be with an oath to support the Con
stitution of tho United States. I
do not believo that the men who
aro willing to dio for their convic
tions will be tho most readv to per- 1
jure themselves for placo. Parties
aro but necessary evils. There
aro, great moments in a nation’s life
when the times should rise above
them. Why may not tho true spirit!
q£ the people have way? This is
tho centennial year. Let it be a
“year of jubilee.” Before us is a
grand outlook of history. Who
shall estimate the power and popu
lation of this country at tho close
nf the century now dawning, if wo,
the people, are equal to the divine
opportunity? IVho knows what
trials may await us, what terapta
tions may beset? Let us challenge
destiny as one. people. Let us
have the only union which can be
permanent—a union of hearts.—
Let the true feeling of the hour
find genuine expression unrestrain
el, and reconstruction will coma—
not by legal enactment, not by
force bills or writa of law, but in
the hearts of the people, like the
dawning of day, like the breath of
the morning, like the Spirit of the
Lord.”
Jlnrmois Worship.
A letter from a visitor to Salt Lake
to the Troy Times gives a brief sketch
of ..the Mormon style of worship. The
writer says: “The principal object to
see here is the turbernacle, or house of
worship. This is an oblong building,
which seats 13,000 people. It - has a
wide gallery, extendingtiround the en-
tire structure, except at one end where
the organ stands. This organ is of the
same size as the great organ in Boston,
and was built by tba Mormons upon
tho very spot where it stands. It is
thirty-two feet in height, and larger
than many of the houses in the city
It is richly ornamented with carvings
in some dark wood. Tt requires four
men to blow the bellows. There are
twenty entrances i ‘his tabernacle We
attended service there shis atiortiyon at
two o'clock. There wqro about five
thousand people present. . Th_e service
lasted two hours,aikl a quarter.. The
choir is composed of one hundred men
and women. The men s,it up m one-side
of the tabernacle, the women -upon, the
other. ' The "Sacrament of tfys. Lord’s
Supper is celebrated every Sunday; it
consists of bread and water; all partake
of it who have been baptized; it. is serv
ed by ten men during the preaching of
the sermon. They have but cue service
vwcek iu the tabernacle, and that is on
Sunday at'two o'clock p.pa. The Sun.
ifey’sdhoofa arm other church ■. service -
five held To ward churches—-twenty
one in all. The sermon .this,
was given by Elder Taylor, one of
the twelve" Apostles of the Church. It
lasted one hour and twenty minutes,
tuid yet [ did nodding head ij*
the audience. The service is similar tu
: rturs, or about the same. It, is opened
oy a hymn, than a prayer is made by
■ one of the Eldjtfs, *-iiymn, then
The sermon - T’haserm'dn is eVtem
‘porized lecture; notext is taken, al
though the Bible (a largo copy) fs-,t
upon the desk; the Book of Mormon is
also upon the desk. The minister
neither reads from the Bible* nor the
Book of Mormon. During the ser
men, or at the commencement of the
seipmn, eight deaeons prepare the bread
—that is, break it and put it into the
silver baskets; when it is ready the min-
ister pauses a moment, and one of the
aiders descends from bis seat and
I blesses it, After the bread, has been
taken around, which requires oomo
: time, then the Deacons pour the water
! fro pi the silver pitchers into 'largo sil
-1 ver cups. When that is ready there is
another pause in the sermon, another
| Elder comes down and blesses tho wa
iter, and that is served. The ceremony
ooionpies nearly all of the tlmc-tb sor>
men is going on. There are two barrels
of water, from which the Deacons re
plenish their pitchers from time, to
time. The cornmuuicnnts seem to-take
a good drink cf water, instead of a sip
only; indeed, I saw no one, tako, lefts
than several swallows. That accounts
for the nee ssity of two barrels- . Oh,
but such a congregation of hard coun
tenances! They are a hard-work look
ing people, browned by, exposure to.
the air, and dressed in clothes anu bon-;
nets that they brought with them when
they came out as pioneers,” ...
HIT 4ND HUMOR.
—An Irishman says that tho only
way to stop suicide is to make it'a cap
ital offence, punishable with’ death.
—An auctioneer once advertised a
lot‘of chairs which, ite said, -tjiad beer,
used by children without backs.”
A wag lent a clergyman a horse
that ran away and threw him, and then
claimed credit for spreading the gospel.
- “ What & I hi/Ausc'of that bell’
* a ■;/** 1
ringing?” inquired Henry. “I think,”
sdid John, “somebody has pulled the
rope”
—Josh Billings says : “ There ain’t
enny thing’ that'will completely kure ''
lazyness, though a second wife has Lecu
known to hurry it some.”
No man can do anything-against
his will,” said a metaphysician “
“ Faith,’; said I’at, “ 1 had a brother
who weut to prison against.bis will
faith he did.”
—A physician writes, asking the re
newing of a note, and says : “We arc
!h a horrible crisis, thcro is not a sick
man in tho district.”
-
—“ Wliafc do you think is tho best
size for a man ?” drawled a lazy fop
who was talking to his physician
“ Hxcrcise," sternly replied the doctor
-rA musical author, being asked if
he had composed anything lately, re
plied : “My last work was a compos'
tion. with my creditors.”
—The excuse of a young lady'to her
minister, who caught her napping,
was : “ Don’t you think that ladies
had better he fast asleep than fas?
awake ?”
—Nothing will sooner tempt a bach
elor to abandon his rcs'dut.'on to marry
than to sleep in an adjoining room to a
.no. m