Newspaper Page Text
BY S. B. CRAFTON.
SANDERSYILLE, GEORGIA, TUESDAY, EOYEMBER 30, 1852.
VOL. WO, 45
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MISCELLANEO US,
BUSINESS DIRECTORY,
* LAWSON & GOD?E.ES“i
Commission Merchants)
93 BAY STREET,
SAVANNAH, GEO.
[p. A. LAWSON. J. E. GODFREY.]
LOUD di CO. .
Factors and Commission Merchants,
Wo. 118, BAY STREET,
SAVANNAH, GA.
L W, C, Loud,] [P. H. Loud.
[from THE CASSVILLE standard.]
To the Citizens of the State of
Georgia,
At a recent meeting in the city of Macon,
of a number of your fellow citizens from va^
vious sections of the State, to consider the
propriety of asking Legislative interference
for the suppression of the traffic in intoxi
cating drinks, the undersigned were ap
pointed a Committee to address you upon
this all important subject. ,
The following plan of operation for effect
ing the suppression of the traffic was pro*
posed, discussed and adopted.
1. That the citizens of Georgia, who fa
vor this object, petition the Legislature at
its next regular session to repeal the pic*
sent License Laws, and to leave it to the
citizens of the several counties to determine
by vote regularly taken, whether the liber*
ty to sell intoxicating drinks within their
respective limits shall be granted or denied.
2. The same Legislature (of 1853) shall
be asked to instruct the voters at the next
regular election in October 1854, to indorse
oiTtheir tickets, “sale” or “no sale”—that,
thus the general sentiment of our citizens
may be known, and, if the majority of the
voters demand, a law passed for the entire
suppression of the traffie.
3. That for the purpose of securing an
efficient organization for carrying out these
objects, a convention of the citizens favora
ble thereto, in which every county may be
represented, be called at Atlanta on lues-
day, 22d February, 1853.
The object of "this circular is to call the
attention of our fellow citizens to this sub
ject, and to secure a representation of all the
counties in the State in tne Convention he»e-
in proposed.
We cannot within the compass of this
paper, adduce a tithe of the reasons, which
might be argued in favor of this movement.
Let it suffice to insist that vve are urging
nov. 4, 1851.
42—ly
BEHJNT di ?OSi2B,.
Factors and Commission Merchants
Savannah, Ga<
P.tt. BEHN,] [JOHN FOSTER,
fcb. 10,1852.
3—1 v
J © IE 3XALLBRY >
Draper and Tailor.
Dealer iu Ready-Made Clothing and Gcntle-
eii’sfurnislnng Goods. 155, Bay street,
Savannah. Ga.
fob. 10, 1852. 3
-ly
FHZZ.1F KUAN.
Draper and Tailor.
And dealer in Ready-made Clothing, shirts'
stocks, suspenders, hancTk’ffs, gloves, Marino
and silk under shirts, drawers,
Bryan street, Savannah, Ga.,
fob. 10, 1852.
&,c. No. 98,
3—lv
~J. T. JONES.
Manufacturer and importer of
Guns.Pistols, Rities, Sporting Apparatus, &c.,
No' 8, Monument Square, Savannah, Ga.
in i sV«j 1V‘
fob. 10, 1852.
. t. DA&HER’S
Cheap Dry Goods Store,
No. 146, Congress street, Savannah, Ga,
(Late H. Lathrop’s)
A well selected stock of seasonable staple
and Fancy Dry Goods, are kept constantly on
hand, and will be sold cheap tor cash.
Please call and examine
feb. 10, 1852.
3—ly
BOTBW33LL diCO.
S E
Wholesale and Retail Stove,
Xo. 173, Bay street, Savannah, Ga.
DEALERS IN
LIQUORS, WINES, GROCERIES. $c
S. E. BOTHWELL.] [ R - GAMBLE-
feb. 10, 1852.
3—ly
JOHNSON &CO.
SCRANTON
grocer s.
Savannah, Ga.
Savannah.
our fellow*citizens to the performance of a
long neglected duty. It is an ohv ious ti uth
tbelorce of which every good citizen will at
once feel, that it is the duty of every citizen
to do whatever lies in his power to advance
the public weal. We now assert that the
pubic interest will be advanced by the sup
pression of the traffic in intoxicating drinks,
and if we can then make it appear that we
have the right and the power to suppress
it—that it is our duty to do so, will be con
clusively established.
Who can for a moment doubt that our
interests pecuniary, political, social and mor
al, would be greatly beuedfed if, from this
dav, no more intoxicating drinks could^be
procured in this State? Hut let us look at
the subject a little more closely, and notice
first what effect the suppression of the tra ffic
would have on our pecuniary interest?. _
The thousands of dollars now spent m
gratifying a debased appetite, would he ad
ded to the profitable capital of the country,
and would produce annually, a valuable re
turn. That which this money purchases is
destroyed in the use, never to appear again
in any productive form, while if it were used
for improving the. land, or for establishing
manufactories, or expended upon interna!
improvements, the wealth ot the. State
would be increased, profitable employment
would be afforded to the poor, aud new
channels of trade would be opened. Every
class of our citizens would partake of the
benefits of a wise investment of capital, and
none more than the vender, who would., find
an adequate compensation for the destruc
tion of the business, in having new sources
of wealth opened to him. The change pro
posed, thus looks eveu to his permanent in
terests, and many who sell are sofu y con
vinced of this fact, that they are willing to
forego this source of gain, if others won.I
voluntarily or under the compulsion ot law,
relinquish it.
These would be a few of the results of a
profitable investment of the money now
spent annually in drinks, and which it burn
ed up or buried m the ocean, would be no
more certainly a dead loss to all the econom
ical interests of the community than it now
character, and they annually make heavy
draughts upon the wealth of tbe community
and th us reduce the absolute capital. Their
poverty and thriftlessness throws them and
their families as burdens npon the neigh
borhood or country, to be supported by pri
vate or public beneficence. Their vicious
habits and inflamed passions lead them into
crime, and our courts of law and officers of
justice, our police, our jails and penitentia
ries, established mainly for the prevention
and punishment of their crimes, are sup
ported by a tax, enormous in the aggregate
which ^abstracted from the capital of the
sober and industrious citizen. Let us add
to this expenditure the corruption and con
sequent decrease in value of our negroes—
the loss of property by their dishonesty—its
destruction by fire or other casualties, origi
nating in the carelessness of drunken agents,
or laborers, or carriers, and we will feel that
tbe suppression of the traffic, the source of
these evils, will largely promote the pecuni
ary interests of the entire community, and
thus advance the public weal.
Nor would tbe suppression of the traffic
be less advantageous in a political point of
view. The immortal Washington said in
his farewell address : “It is substantially true
that virtue or morality is a necessary spring
of a popular government,” and the senti
ment finds an eoho in every patriotic bo
som. Ours is such a government, and its
stability depends essentially upon the self
government of its citizens. But intemper
anee of any degree destroys all self-control
by firing the passions, debasing tbe habits
and dethroning the reason. Who can safe
ly Wist his character, or his property, much
less his political liberties, tbe conservation
of which dependc so entirely upon a sober
judgment- and a sound patriotism, to the
keeping of drunkards ? And yet the ine
briate has quite as potent a voice in the
popular government as the pu.est and wis
est patriots. Let intemperance corrupt and
degrade the masses, and our liberties will
beuuder the control of those who have in
capacitated thenise'ves for a wise direction
of the government or a injudicious choice of
law-makeis. By as far as men of this class
have sway, by so far are our institutions
placed in jeopardy; diminish their number
and we lessen the danger; and all experi
ence teaches that we can remove this oause
of apprehension only by suppressing the
orrog shops—the centres of power to unscru
pulous and aspiring demagogues. Every
patriot owes Ibis duty to bis country.
Our limited space forbids that we should
unde' take to portray specifically all the so
cial Jand moral evils, to which the liquor
traffic gives rise; nor need we do so. “Tbeir
name is Legion,” and they lie open to the
observation of all. Half the domestic want
and wretchedness, and more than half the
social vice, and the secret and open crime,
which shames our moral sensibilities, de
trac t from our high cbaiacter as a people,
and deluges the land with tears, resultfrom
the intemperance of either tbe past or the
present general ion. To abolish the liquor
traffic will he to introduce sobriety, indus-
aocl thrift—to restore brotherly love
which our civil rights and our Constitution
al law-are adjudicated, the Supreme Court
of the United States. Chief justice Taney
Simple Division*
We heard a story tbe other night on the
subject of “Division” that we thought ‘some’
has said; “If any Slate deems the retail ! at the time, and never having seen it in
try
and domestic peace—to dimmish pauperism
and crime—to send a flood of joy through
the heart of many a poor wife and shame
and internal Traffie iu ardent spirits injuri
ous to its citizens, I see nothing in the con
stitution to prevent it from regulating and
restraining the Traffic, or f"om prohibiting
it altogether.”
Mr. Justice Grier has said : “It is not
necessary to array the appalling satisfies
of misery, and pauperism, &e., &e., which
have their origin in tbe use and abuse of ar
dent spirits. Tbe police power, which is ex
clusively in the States, is alone competent
to the correction of these great evils, and
all measures of restraint or promotion ne
cessary to effect the purpose, are within the
scope of that authority. All laws for the
restraint or punishment of crime, or the pre
servation of the pnblie peace, health, and
morals, are from their very nature of prima
ry importance, and lie at the foundation of
social existence. They are for the protec
tion of life and liberty, and necessarily com
pel all laws on subjects of secondary impor
tance, which relate only to property, conve
nience of luxury, to recede when they come
in contact or collision. Salus populi su-
prema lex. The exigiences of the social
compact require that sneli laws be executed
before aud above all others. It is for this
reason that quarantine laws, which protect
public health; compel mere commercial reg
ulations to submit to their control. They
restrain the liberty of the passengers; they
operate on the ship, which is the instrument
of commerce, and its officers and crew, the
agents of navigation. They seize the in
fected cargo, and cast it overboard. All
these things are done, not from any power
which the State assumes to regulate com
merce, or interfere with the regulations of
congress but because police laws for the pre
vention of crime, and protection of the pub
lic welfare, must of necessity have full and
free opertion, according to the exigienev
that requires their interference. If a loss ot
revenue should accrue to the United States
from a diminished consumption of ardent
spirits, she will be the gainer a thousand
fold in the health, wealth and happiness of
the people.”
We believe, fellow-citizens, that the ar
guments now set forth are irrefutable, and
^hat they fully establish our right and our
duty to suppress this obnoxious traffic; and
it may bs further added, that if we have
the power to do so, and refrain from exer
eising it, we become participators in the,
crimes, which originate in our neglect of
duty.
Let us no longer shun our duty. Our
country burdens for the support of the pau
perism - and for the prevention and punish
ment of the crimes, orinating in Intemper
ance in our several counties, give us a claim
to determine whether or not within our own
county limits, the traffic shall be continued,
Let us demand that our legislature shall first
repeal the License Law, so that no man can
legally defy the moral sense of the people
of an entire country, and that then it shall
be left to the citizens of ibe respectiva coun
ties to say, whether or not the traffic shall
be carried on in their midst. Let the peo
ple, as the sovereign power, claim and ex
print, we are tempted to give our readers
the benefit of it.
A Southern planter named pretty
well to do in tbe world now, was some twen
ty years ago a poor boy on the eastern shore
of Marylaud. One of the strongest and
moat marked traits ot his character was an
inordinate love ot money. This however
is characteristic of the people of ‘them dig-
gins,’ where they practice skinning strangers
during brisk seasons, and skinning one a
notber during dull times. In due course of
time P. was of age, and thought it about
time to get married. He went to a neigh
boring village, and in the course of events
was introduced to a daughter ot Judge B,
‘Dang fine gal,’ said the embryo specu
lator tohis friends who was gaining him an
entrance among the elite
•Very.’ .
‘How much might Judge B. be worth.
‘Why about $10,000,’ was the reply.
‘Anil how many children has Judge B?
continued the inquirer.’
‘Only three.’
‘Three into ten goes three tiroes and a
third over,’ mentally cyphered P. Here was
a chance—a glorious chance, and he im
proved it too. He made love to the beau-
thul and unsophisticated daughter of the
Judge with all. the variations. Strange to
say--for he was as uncouth a looking cub
as ever went unlicked—his suit prospered
and they were married.
The honey moon passed off, as all other
honey moons do, and they were happy. I he
bride was lively and chatty, and often made
allusions to her brothers and sisters. Star
tled at a number of names he thought should
not be in the catalogue of relations, one
evening at tea, he said- -
‘My dear, I thought there was only three
of you.
•So there are, by my Ma, but Pa’s first
wife had eight more.’
‘Eleven go into ten no limes and nanry
one over!' said the astonishedP., who jump
ed up, kicked over the chair and groaned
in perfect agony, ‘I’m sold! and a d—m
sight cheaper than an old hell weathei
sheep, at that'.—Pittsburg Sunday Mercu
ry.
[FROM THE LITERARY MUSEUM*]
Reverie of a Young Lady.
How cold it seems, metfainks! but my
fire burns brightly and tbe light-wood blaze
dances merrily, and leaps up in the ebimney
av if laughing to scorn tbe wild pranks of
old Eolus. Still, I feel chilly. I will draw
nearer tbe fire, and write down my thoughts
as they run,
Alas t' I am quite alone. My parents are
both absent, and my brothers and sisters
have retired. Heigho, I wish I had a lover J
This is such a charming evening for him to
whisper in loving tones of love. We would
have no light bat that from the glowing
fireplace } and there would be no one to dis
turb us. Ok, it must be so nice to have a
lover, Oh, dear [ I was nineteen yesterday
Dow Jr's Faith.—-I believe that kicking
against custom and spitting in the faee of
fashion, is a futile and foolish endeavor.—
Both may need correction—but they must
and will have their own way.
I believe that if the devil be the father of
liars, he has a plagued large family to look
after, and that it is rapidly increasing.
I believe girls are like kittens; gently
smooth them down the right way, they rub
and purr most affectionately ; but give
them the contrary brush, and their back is
up in the most disdainful manner. They
like to be kissed, but sham a delicacy about
and have had no offer yet i What is to be
come of roe ? Ah, I know! Harry Leonard
is not married yet, and I intend to keep
myself for him. Papa says I am too young
to marry. Too young to marry !■ Indeed,
be must forget bow old I am. But Harry
will come back some time, and he is worth
waiting for. He used to dob himseli my
champion in all our little school difficulties
and I love him yet. I ean see him now,
gazing on me with his dark, earnest eyes.
Ah, he is a noble fellow 1 1 wish he would
come back. He nover said in words that
he loved me, but I could see that he dkj 1
******
Now, with tbe dim firelight flickering on
our faces, Many is by my side. We have
spoken long of the old times, when we were
but children l , .
Harry is gazing upon roe I And now, in
soft low tones, he tells me of Lis love and his
hopes, and bow be feared, during that wea
ry absence, that when he returned be would
find me the happy bride of another. And
then how he rejoiced to bear that I was still
unmarried. And now, (oh, how I tremble)
be asks me if 1 will be his wife! His wife \
how happy this word makes me ! But I'can
not speak, I place roy hand silently in bis
and he needs no other answer. He thanks
me again and again ; and, in strange, fitful
conversation we pass the time away; Now
he is gone. He went with a whispered as
surance that he would be here to-morrow.
And to morrow comes. Harry is here
early, to see my fatther. And now it is
over—papa has blessed me, and called me
his dear, good child; and mamma’s tear#
are mingled ones of joy and sorrow.
Weeks pass, and Harry and myself are
living in our own house. He is caressing
me as usual, and I begin to believe that I
am really married and have a husband
whom I am to ‘love, honor and obey.’ And
but what is this ? I am all alone in
the dark l Where is Harry ? Pshaw ! All
this was but a dream. How provoking !
At any rate, if one cannot have a reaiity.it
is very pleasant to dream. Don’t you think
so?'
No surer destroyer
smiiten household—to arrest tbe downward erase tbeir own rights; and who shall deny
steps ofmany a noble youth—and to remove them this liberty?
tbe temptations to tbe most debasing and Let all the counties of the State send up
brutalizing of vices out of the way of our Representatives to the Atlanta Convention;
servants, 'our sons, and our daughters’ there to devise the proper measures to be
To Keep Young.
of youth, of youth’s privileges, and powers
the operation. ; aud delights, than yielding the spirit to the
I believe that simple honesty, the nakeu empire of ill-temper and selfishness.. We
D. T. SCRANTON,
JOSEPH JOHNSTON
feb. 10, 1852.
HUMPHREYS
W. B. SCRANTON,
No. 19, Old Slip, N. Yor
3—ly
m ‘
JTCHNfeOPI
Wholesale and Detail Druggists
is.
new of the case
Tbe
Smets’ Buildings, corner of Broughton an •
Whitaker streets, Savannah, Ga. .
Dealers in Drugs, Medicines, Chemicals,
Perfumery, Fancy Articles, &c.
iragr*> Soda water of a superior quality.
fcb. 10, 1862,’ 3 -ly -
HENRY ROTSCHHXI.D,
Dealer in Ready-Made Clothing,
DRY GOODS, cf c.
No. 178,,Congress street, next door to H. J.
Gilbert, Savannah, Ga.
Gentlemen’s garments made to order,
feb. 10,1852. 3 -ly
Importer
N (
A. PONCE,
and Manufacturer
S E G A R S,
O. 13, Whitaker street, keeps constantly
apt
on hand a well selected stock of imported
But there is another v
which adds strength to the argument
money thus spent not only makes no .profit
able return, but its expenditure m this way
makes such a return as diminishes very con
siderably the amount of absolute capital) ,
the country. Labor is the poor man s cap
ita!, and intemperance destroys Loth the di
position and tbe ability to labor. Tbe pwo
is found in &e multitude ot men m otn
State who have been enervated and made
indolent, or, worse still, have Lfomeincii-
rablv diseased from indulgence .n stiong
drink. If collected they would make an
an army of consumers
army-
-a dead
weight on the community, producing noth
in etc add to the general wealth ; an array
perpetuated in our midst by the liquor traf
fic Suppose that all our citizens were such,
where Sid be our agriculture our com
merce, our internal improvement*, the gen
eral prosperity oor jmW JWgl We
and
Segars,' X£ Manufactured To^acg Sn«|
Pipes, and all other articles usually kept m his
P ie of business, which he offers on the m
reasonable terms.
Savannah, - feb' 10,1852.
t _ . J. fc
6- -ly t
would soon degenerate iuto barbansm
ovevv individual among us of the class spec
ified" tends to drag us back to that con di
ion’or at least to hinder our progress.to a
tion, oi Tbit there are thousands
such’and'the public interests loudly demand
that wd eradicate tire traffic; the prohbc
Su ce of this class of unproductive ctizens.
The argument is not yet exhausted.--
Tbpsf* citizens" non-produces as they me, aie
ye^consumersj’often of the most expensive
husbands.
In view of these facts we maintain that
tbe public weal demands the suppression of
tbe Traffic: and now assert, upon tbe ax
iomatic principle, that each citizen is bound
to advance tbe public weal, that it is our
duty to suppress it it we have the moral
power and tbe Constitutional right to do it.
Whether we have tbe moral power is an
open question, is now submitted to your
selves. In many counties, without doubt,
tbe Traffic can be easily abolished ; and this
Committee is loathe to believe that there is
a county or even a community in tue State
where tbe “Liquor Influence” predominates
over the power of sound morality, patriotism
and good citizenship, where these elements
of our prosperity shell succumb to the de
mand of the liquor dealer and his besotted
adherents. Experience has proven that we
cannot extirpate this vice by “moral sua
sion.” YYhat can be done in this way has
been done; but inexperienced youth is too
easily seduced from the path of sobriety—
the slave is too entirely tbe subject of bis
appetite-the moderate drinker is. too se
cure in bis own strength--the drunkard is
too much under the dominion of a diseased
physical and moral nature and of depraved
habits to avoid the snares which everywhere
around spread-for their feet;. and. the ven
der, ready to take advantage of this fact and
anxious to accumulate gain, even at the sac
rifice of every private and public interest,
will not abandon the traffic, and withdraw
the temptation while a victim remains to be
ruined, unless the Law compels him to.
so. “Moral Suasion” can do nothing with
him, nor save his hopeless victims; the mor
al power of the community must do its act-
in* through the Law. We believe that
his moral power does not lie with the er
ring young or the moderate drinker, or the
inebriate or the vender, and that therefore
we can array it against the traffic, and on
the side of right, virtue and humanity;
aud we now invoke every citizen to do ffis
duty to his race and country. .
The right is clearly on our side. Dm J9
not, as the last, an open question. What :
ever it may have been in past Tune, it is no
longer a debateable point,- for it ha3 been
definitely settfed by the highest tribunal at
taken for the suppression of the Liquor
Traffic. God save the State.
B. BraNtly, Green Co.
W. S. Williford, Bibb Co.
J. E. Evans, Muscogee Co.
Dan’l. Sanfod, Monroe Co.
J. W. Burke, Cass Co.
J. H. Newton, Clarke Co.
D. McGeiiee, Meriwether Co.
C. Welborn, Houston Co.
E. H. Myers, Bibb Co.
Oct. 29th, 1852.
truth, pure virtue, and a straight up and
down way of dealing with the world, have
as much advantage over the vices, tricks and
stratagems of the devilish, in the long run,
as a good square-trotting horse has over a
prancing pony or racker that goes his mile
or two like the mischief, and is done for the
rest of the journey.
A Case of Conscience.—A gentleman re
siding in OlairborUe county, Mississiopi’
sends the following letter to the Port Gib
son Herald for publication, remarking that
the amount spoken of in the note was actu
ally received by him: “Dear Sir: Enclosed
you will find forty dollars as a representa
tion for withholding twenty dollars from
you six or eight years ago. You knew it
not, but I did, aud it has hung a weight on
my soul ever since. I have prayed for forgive
ness, but I feel I cannot be forgiven till I
make restitution. Will you, sir, forgive me,
and pray God to forgive me.”
Reader, do you owe for your newspaper,
Pitching into Greely.--The Albany N.
Y. Knickerbocker, a violent Whig, paper, ...
thus discourses concerning the Tribune man: j If you do, you can hope for no forgiveness
“So Ion* as the Whig pa 'ty looks upon i until you make restitution. As in tbe above
Greelvr? one of the fathers of the church, case, notling but prompt payment can or
and takes every thing be utters for gospel, j ought to give you peace of mindand a clear
so long may they expect to stand where conscience, bo pay up at once,
they now do among the ‘used up’ and an-
should all be cautious, as we advance in life,
of allowing occasional sorrowful experience
to overshadow perception of the prepon
derance of good. Faith in good is atone©
its own rectitude and reward. To believe
good, and to do good truly and trustfully, is
the healthiest of humanity’s conditions*
To take eveuts eheerfully, and promote the
happiness of others, is the way to ensure
the enduring spring of existence. Con
tent and kindnes are the soft vernal show
ers and fostering sunny warmth that ke ep#
a man’r nature and being fresh and green*
“Lord keep my existence fresh and green,”
would be no less a wise prayer than the
one so beautifully recorded respecting
man’s memory. If we would leave a gra
cious memory behind us, there is no way
better to secure it, than by living gracious
ly. A cheerful and benign temper, that
buds forth pleasant blossoms and bears
sweet fruit, for those who live within its
influence, is sure to produce an undying
growth of green rememberances that shall
flourishish immortality after the present
stock is decayed and gone.—Mrs. Cowden
Clarke.
nihilattu. General Scott was not defeated
A Knotty Question Settled.—We enter
ed a lo* school-house once, where a “De
by the Democrats, but by TheKew York j batjn , » was holdi forih upon the
Tribune. The leaders which that paper is j question . a man saw his wife and rao th-
’ er in the water drowning, which should he
A New Title to the Lobos Islands.—The
New York Courier says that, the persons
concerned in the guaho expedition fiom that
city have despatched an agent to Madrid to
negotiate through the American Minister
there, with the Court of Spain, for the lease
or purchase of the Lobos Islands. This is
said to have been done by the advices of
eminent counsel^ who are of opinion that if
any nation has a claim to those islands, it
constantly getting ont on pig iron, temper
ance and satinet, would crush another
Washington.”
SiST “Run,” and get me an armful of
wood,” said a woman to her husband on©
rainy day, “as you are wet and I atn dry.”
The same plea was used for a dozen errands.
At last it was, “get me a bucket of water,
for you a:e wet and I am dry.” The buek-
et of water was brought, when the husband
The question was considered j ^ rew ^ over her,exclaiming “Now do your
help.frcstf'L
with animation upon both sides for a while, gha ^ for y0H are wet too.”
when a backwardness began to manifest lt-
fif
is the Spanish, who discovered and naimed, . anofcher mother? not easy.” Thissettl
them, and through whom alone Peru claims Qn ^ the verdic [ accordingly,
title tO‘thfiHfif
self. The president desired debaters;
they had anything to say to continue on.”
Afeer a pause a peaked looking man in the
backpart of the “meeting” got up and said,"
with considerable diffidence and embarrass
ment: “Mr. President—I think if-a man saw
his mother and his wife in the water drown
ing, he ought to help his mother out first:
because, you see, if his wife did git drownded,
he could git another one, but he couldn’t
This flettled
jjgy A gentleman was agreeabiy sur
prised to see a plump turkey served up for
dinner, and inquired of bis servant bow it
was got. “Wy, sar,” said Cuff,'“dat dave
turkey hab bin roosrin’ on our fence dese
tree nights, so dis raorhiu* I t’ougbt I would
seize him for de rent oh de fenc -1 .”
join* down the vale of teirsf
as the barrel of flour said ven it was gettin’
lowered into the ship’s hold.
At Cincinnati, Ohio, when Tom Thumb
was selling his pamphlet, and greeting the
ladies with a kiss, a negro woman bought
one, and puckered up her mouth for a salute.
Tom drew back—“Ah ah,” said he, “go
away, colored person, dis child iyn t g vino
to ’malgamate.” “Well, please de lor,” ex
claimed the negro in astonishment, “if he
wasn’t no bigger dan a mouse, he’d be sure
to have suffiu against de colored ~~— u -
tion”.
Law Quibbles.—A tippling lawyer, no
ted for his ingenions pleading, while he was
reading about' Eve’s fall, the other day, at
once exclaimed: “If she had known this
flaw, it would have been quite easy; to avoid
the law. The right of Eden could never
have been denied her, if she had squeezed
the fruit and drank the cider.” ,v>'
JJST* “How many rods make a furlong?’
asked a father of his son, a ‘fast’ urchin, as
became home one night from the town
school. “Well, I don’t know, boss,” was
the reply of the young hopeful, “but I guess
you’d think one rod made an acker, if you
got such a tanning as I did from old vinegar
fkc«, this afternoon.” The parent stood a-
A lady who wished some stuffing from %
roast duck which a gentleman was earvnSg
at a public table, requested him to transfer
from the deceaseded fowl to her plate r
of its artificial intestines, I®*"
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