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the central geokgian GENERAL ADVERTISEMENTS
Carriage Repository -BlacksmitBiog.
IP(D)]1 C 3P3S‘S ,
IS PUBLISHED
EVERY TUESDAY MORNING,
TERMS :
If paid sir icily in advance, per year, $1 50
If not paid at the time of subscribing, $2 00
These terms will be strictly adhered
to WITHOUT RESPECT TO PERSONS, AND ALL
SUBSCRIPTIONS WILL BE REQUIRED TO BE SET
TLED UP EVERY YEAR.
Advertisements not exceeding twel re lines,
will be inserted at one dollar for the first in
sertion, and fifty cents for each continuance.
Advertisements not having the number of in-
^rtions specified, will be published until for-
Sales of Land and Negroes by Executors,
P Administrators and Guardians, are required by
law to be advertised in a public gazette forty
days previous to the -day ot sale.
The sale of Personal Property must be ad
vertised in like manner at least ten days.
Notice to Debtors and Creditors ot an es
tate tr ust be published lorty days.
Notice that application will be made to the
Court of ordinary for leave to sell Land and
Negroes, must be published weekly loi two
months. . .
Citations for letters of administration must
be published thirty days—for dismission from
Administration, monthly for six months— for dis
mission from Guardianship, forty days.
Rules for foreclosure of Mortgage must be
published monthly for four months—for estab
lishing lost papers, for the full space of three
months—for compelling titles from Executors
or Administrators, where a bond has been giv
en by the deceased, the full space of6 months.
Publications will always be continued ac
cording to these, the legal requirements, unless
otherwise ordered.
All letters on business must be vosl-jmid
THE DIM OLD WOODS.
BUSINESS DIRECTORY.
SWXITH& 3.&0TSSS. i
Dealers in Domestic Produce and
PRO VISIONS.
209 Duane Street, New York.
Solicits Southern orders for the same,
thev will pack and ship in the best manner,
and sell at the lowest cash price.
[s. B. SMITH, j- F. SMITH
Feb. 1, 1853. 1—3m
LAWSON & GODPItB?,
Commission Merchants,
93 BAY STREET
SAVANNAH, GEO.
[P. A. LAWSON. J. E. GODFREY.]
LOTJD dk. CO.
Factors and Commission Merchants,
Ho. 118, BAY STREET,
SAVANNAH, GA.
J. W. C. Loud.] [P- H. Loud.
nov. 4, 1851.
42—lv
BBHKT & POSTER,
Factors and Commission Merchants
Savannah, Ga.
P.H. BEIIN,] [JOHN FOSTER,
feb. 10,1852. 3—ly
JOHN IVIAXjLER.'Sr.
Draper and Tailor.
Dealer in Ready-Made Clothing and Gentle-
en’efurnishing Goods. 155, Bay street,
Savannah, Ga.
feb. 10, 1852. 3—ly
PHILIP KUAN.
Draper and Tailor,
And dealer in Ready-made Clothing, shirts
stocks, euspenders, handk’ffs, gloves, Marino
and silk under shirts, drawers, &c. No. 98,
Bryan street, Savannah, Ga.,
feb. 10, 1852. 3—ly
J. T. JOOTES.
Manufacturer and importer of
Guns, Pistols, Rifles, Sporting Apparatus, &c.,
No - 8. Monument Square, Savannah, Ga.
feb. 10, 1852. 3 ly*
T. DASHER’S
Cheap Dry Goods Store,
No. 146, Congress street, Savannah, Ga.
(Late II. Lathrop’s)
A well selected stock of seasonable staple
and Fancy Dry Goods, are kept constantly on
hand, and will be sold cheap tor cash.
fcgF" Please call and examine,
feb. 10, 1852. 3—ly
S E. BOTH WELL & CO.
Wholesale and Retail Store,
No. 173, Bay street, Savannah, Ga.
DEALERS IN
LIQUORS, WINES, GROCERIES. <$c
S. E. BOTHWELL.] [R. L. GAMBLE.
feb. 10, 1852. 3 ~b’
SCRANTON. JOHNSON CO.
GROCERS.
Savannah, Ga.
D. T. SCRANTON,
JOSEPH JOHNSTON
feb. 10, 1852.
• I
Savannah.
W. B. SCRANTON,
No. 19, Old Slip, N. Yor
3—ly
BtmPHRP'SrS & JOHNSON
Wholesale and Retail Druggists,
Smets’ Buildings, corner of Broughton anO
Whitaker streets, Savannah, Ga.
Dealers in Drugs, Medicines, Chemicals,
Perfumery, Fancy Articles, &c.
gegf 0 Soda water of a superior quality.
feb. 10, 1 85r. 3—ly
bdnry rotschhxld.
Dealer in Ready-Made Clothing,
DRY GOODS, 4-c.
No. 178, Congress street, next door to H. J.
Gilbert, Savannah, Ga.
Gentlemen’s garments made to order,
feb. 10,1852. 3—ly
A
Wanted to Hire.
Good COOK, for. which a liberal priee wil
. be paid. Apply at this Offiee.
Jan. 24, ’ r >2-tf
v
T HE subscriber would respectfully an
nounce to his old friends and patrons,
that he is still at his post where he continues to
Manufacture, and Repair, Carriages, Buggies,
Waggons Carts, &e., &c. Th mkftil for the
liberal patronage hitherto bestowed upon him,
he respectfully solicits a coutinuance of the
same. No pains will be spared in mak no
every job sent from his shop ot the neatest anc
most durable character.
In connection with the above lie will still
carry on the Blacksmith business, and is pre
pared to do all kind of work in that line. All
plantation work, horseshoeing &c., done at
shortest notice.
LEWIS BENSON.
Jan. 11,1853. 50—tf
““important notice.
G RATEFUL to our friends for the liberal
patronage heretofore bestowed on us,
we respectfully call thur attention to the fact,
that we will discontinue to sell GOODS on a
Credit, from the first, of January next, and as
we have positively determined to collect our
outstanding debts, we hereby respectfully re
quest our friends who are indebted to us, by
note and account, to call and settle as early as
possible. Those demands, which we hold from
previous to 1852 will be placed in the hands of
an attorney for collection, if they are not set
tled before next March Court.
We have concluded to sell our good for
Cash only, and we therefore offer them either
WHOLE SALE OR RETAIL,
with Great Reduction on former prices those
wishing to purchase will please call on us,
when they will find it to their andvantage, as
as we are determined to sell.
N. B. Those having demands^ against us,
will please present them.
LAZARON & NEWMAN,
dec. 21,1852. 48—tf
FLOITD HOUSE—Macon, «a.
T. a. goodwin, Proprietor.
a. b. hartwell, Superintendent.
THIS well known and popular Hotel
has been thoroughly repaired, and is
now open, and superbly turnished for
the r 1 ception of Boarders and the travelling
community. The Proprietor and his Assist
ants will spare no pains to make this House
one of the best Hotels in the State.
A. B. Hartwell, H. C. Cunningham and S,
Lanier will be happy to receive and welcome
their old friends and acquaintances, and will
use their utmost efforts to make them comfort
able during their stay.
Macon, aug. 31,1852. 31—tf
F. C. LYMAN,
Watch-Maker and Jeweler,
SANDERSVILLE, GEORGIA,
sept. 7,1852. 33—tf
J
Cheese.
UST received a fine lot of Cheese, snd for
saley Z. BRANTLEY,
sept. 23. 36
PROFESSIONAL CARDS.
B. D. EVANS,
Attorney at Law,
SANDERSVILLE, GA.
Will practice in the Counties of the Mid
die Circuit, and injustice’s Courts in this
County. He hopes by assiduity and a dil
igent attention to business, to merit a share
of the public patronage. Office in the
Court House.
Feb. 1, 1853
i—
JAMES S. HOOK,
Attorney at Law,
SANDERSVILLE, GEORGIA
WILL PRACTICE IN THE COUNTIES OF
• •. ) Washington, Burke, Scriven
Middle-circuit. J JeffeiBO g and Emanuel .
Southern Circuit. 1 - - - - Laurens.
Ocmulgee Circuit j ... - Wilkinson.
Office next door to the Central Georgian
office. jan. 1, 1852. 51—ly
J. B. HAYNE,
ATTORNEY'AT LAW.
7/ALCYONDALE Ga.
Will attend promptly to all business in
trusted to his care in any of the Courts of the
Middle or Eastern circuits.
Halcyondale feb. 2 1852 2—(y
R. L. WARTHEN,
Attorney at Law,
SANDERSVILLE, GEORGIA,
feb. 17, 1852. 4—ly
Jan
JN 0. W, RUDISILL.
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
SANDERSVILLE, Ga.
25,1853 52—lv
mulforfIarshT^
Attorney and Counsellor at Law
Office, 175, Bay street, Savannah, Ga.
feb. 10, 1852. 3—ly
S. B. CRAFT0N.
Attorney at Law.
SANDERSVILLE, GEORGIA,
Will also attend the Courts of Emanu
Laurens, and Jefferson, should business be ent
rtusted to his care, in either of those counties-
feb. 11. 4—tf
W. L. nuumriMui/)
sue-ghon sbntisv.
SANDERSVILLE, GEORGIA,
may 10,1852. 1®—tf
The dim old woods in the wintry time !
How solemn and sad their tone,
When the winds sweep thiough, with a
moaning chime
The aisles of the forest lone !
When the root its wonted thirst hath lost,
For the flow of the hidden rill—
And the fragile root is stiff with frost,
And the sap in its cell is still;
When each gay leaf, that threw" so soft
Its shades o’er summer’s brow,
Huth flown from its wavy sphere aloft,
To rest ’neath the starry snow—
When each sweet flower with scented cup,
Frail withering where it grew 7 ,
Hath closed its faded petals up,
No more to drink the dew 7 —
And when each trembling note that gushed,
In soft and silvery song,
And the insect hum, are silent hushed,
The leafless boughs among !
Ah! sorrowing seem those woods so dim,
As they lift their branches bare—
The shivering twig and the rigid limb,
To the clasp of the frosty air;
And they seem to mourn, ’mid the wintry
storm,
For the flush of the gieenwood bough,
And sigh for the sere and ruined bloom
That sleeps on the earth below.
And yet, those dark, sad solitudes !
I love their music well—
When whispering eelio fills the w 7 oods
With tones of her murmuring shell—
For though the wind no voice doth own,
As it sleeps in the silent tree,
Y'et the forest breathes with hollow moan,
Like the sound of the ceaseless sea,
As the spirit forms of leaves and flowers
That grace w 7 arm summer’s smile,
Where rustling still among the bowers,
Where erst they shone the while,
And the spangled frost w r ork, cold and bright,
That g'eams on twig and stem,
Seems a throne for each of frozen light,
With a diamond diadem! [ed,
Oh! I love those gems by the sunbeam kiss-
As they swing in the sparkling air,
And I love in the dim old woods to list
To the voices stirring there !
[From the Georgia Citizen.]
The Whig Party-The Past and the
FUTURE.
To the Editor of the Georgia Citizen :—
You will perhaps, agree with me in the
opinion, sir, that sufficient time has elapsed
since the Presidential election, for the excite
ment occasioned by that event, to have sub
sided, at least to such an extent, as will en
able men to look calmly upon the result.
To you, as one of the champious of the Scott
wing of the Whig party, an able and a prom
inent one in the State of Georgia, I take
the liberty of addressing this letter, well as
sured, that whatever is contained herein,
that may not meet your views of the fu
ture, w ill be pardoned, as coming from one
who is zealously attached to a cause that
has been so signally defeated. I speak
with reference to that portion of the Whig
party which has remained true to its prin
ciples, and against whom no word of re
proach can be pronounced with justice.—
Having a common interest and feeling in
' the success of those principles which we be
lieved to be the soundest and safest for the
country, I have no doubt you felt regret at
their defeat. I have been trained in a school
of politics which has taught me that the
principles and policy of the party should be
adhered to and supported in good faith, es
pecially in contests, whose national charac
ter gives dignity and importance to the re
sult—aud I must confess, therefore, that
when the last ray of hope tor success faded
out, I felt no ordinary degree of chagrin at
the unpropitious finale of our efforts, occa
sioned as it was by the defection of those
on whom it might have been supposed we
could rely. It was but natural, sir, that we
should feel regret—regret for the past—
foreboding for the future. They are manly
emotions—they are the vouchers of an
honest purpose—they are the evidences of
sincerity and truthfulness in what we advo
cated. For my own part, I have never car
ed to conceal such feelings from friend or
foe.
Without adverting to the causes which
induced a large portion of the party to ‘split
off,’ and erect a platform of principles for
themselves, upon which to contend for pow
er in this State, I consider it necessary and
proper, however, to observe here, that such
an act leaves the remaining portion the right
to pursue such a course, and to form such an
alliance, for future action, as maybe deem
ed most conducive to their welfare, without
consultation with, advice from, or consider
ation for, that portion so splitting off.—
The act of those gentlemen who nominated
Mr. Webster, in violation of all party obli
gations, and thus unfeelingly sacrificed old
associations, absolved us from all fraternal
regard for them, and they cannot expect on
the part of those, whom they thus deserted-
any acknowledgment of a claim to consid,
eration in any future action. With this
clear and indisputable position in our favor,
it remains for us to consider the past, only
with reference to the future. In that, amidst
the general gloom which lately overspread
it, rifts of light are to be discerned, sufficient
to encourage a cheerful hope.
In the first place, then, the unprecedented
majority which has been rolled up for the
Democratic party, however gratifying to a
superficial observer, is to their sober aud re
flecting statesmen, rather an omen of evil
import. And why ? Because there » no
substantial matter of fact reason for it—be
yond the mere impulsive, undirected, mo
mentary feeling of the masses. It is a com
et-like political phenomenon, which may
cross our hemisphere once in a quaiter of a
century, without exciting especial wonder,
unless it be that it leaves no lasting impres
sion. There is no deep-rooted, fast-anchor
ed, national principle, which can be claim
ed as producing and giving-character to the
result—which could settle and confirm it,
as defining the future policy of the party or
the government ! This is self-evident from
the difficult) 7 which Mr. Pierce has already
experienced in forming his Cabinet, and
from the fact of the discordant materials
which united—and which, to use the lan
guage of an eloquent gentleman, ‘could not
combine to carry out any great principle.’
Their success then, their magnificent ma
jority, is ephemeral, unreal—
‘Like spectre-kings in Banquo’3 prescient
glass.’
This is sensibly felt now—and will be
hereafter-a mortifying reflection, if it does
not materially embarrass the popularity of
incoming administration.
Besides, there is a class of citizens in this
country, though not very numerous, certain
ly, are nevertheless generally intelligent,
who cannot be said to belong to either of
the two great political parties, or any of
their subdivisions. They generally vote as
inclination, preference, or predilection may
incline them. They might very properly
be termed Impartialists. This body of our
citizens seldom take an active part in our
political elections, unless upon occasions of
more than ordinary importance, when some
great national principle or measure is in
volved, or the peace and safety of the coun
try or the Union is endangered. They do
not sanction or encourage extremes of party
movements, and may be considered there
fore a conservative body. I take it that few
of this class of citizens voted at the late Pres
idential election. An act then on the part
of the next Administration which would
seom to encourage any extreme measure,
whether of Disunion, Intervention, or Filli-
busterisni, would be the signal to rally them
in opposition, and upon safe and conserva
tive piinciples.
But the immediate policy of the party, at
this time, can only have reference to local
matters. A national organization is not
called for, neither is it necessary. Still, in
choosing its position, care should be takeu
not to commit it to measures, which at a
future day, may embarrass its freedom, or
give to its alliance, the appearance of the
want of principle. The most distinguish
ing feature, at this moment, between the
whigs and democrats, in this State, is the
absence on the part of the former, in their
•platforms, of that extreme progressiveness,
which marks the views of the latter. It is
probable, that they have advaneed such
opinions, in the heat of discussing sectional
wrongs, as their cooler judgments would
not consider applicable to the times, and
which, in truth, amount to nothing, because
the sober sense of the people have discard
ed them, aud for the present, at least, they
are no more spoken of.
But while our Southern Rights brethren
have been too much in advance, is it not pos
sible we have been too much behind? Can
it be denied that our extreme couservative-
ness has not acted unfavorably to our suc
cess ? May we not learn a lesson of wisdom
on this point ? Can we not profit by the
experience of the past, which has shown us
that neither extreme has an abiding confi
dence with the people. Should we not con
sider, in our future action, this important
point, and determine by wise and deliberate
reflection, how far it will be proper and ex
pedient, both for ourselves and the country,
to adopt a more energetic policy, suited ex
pansive character of the times ? If we can
not prevent an evil, we may be able to neu
tralize its effects. The spirit of progress is
abroad, and we must move with it. We
may find it, therefore, not only prudent
and proper, but positively the most consist
ent on our part, and safe for the country,
to throw ourselves into the tide, and infuse
a spirit of a prudential character in its ad
vances to take a seat even in the chariot of
that fast young man just out of Jericho, for
the double purpose of expediting our own
journey, and tempering the gallantry and
patriotism which he manifests, and which
is certainly an essential element to our
greatness as a nation, when properly direc
ted.
But I cannot say that it would not en
danger the country’s welfare for the Whig
party to abandon, entirely, its safe and time-
honored anchorage. For, although there
is something in the gravity of all conserva
tive principles aud measures, that has an
aristocratic tendency, which seems to be un
suited to the spirit of the masses, on ordi
nary occasions, yet, in all times of iminent
danger, they afford a safe retreat, and are a
rallying point to all true lovers oftheir coun
try, her honor, and her greatness. This
fact has been demonstrated more than once,
in the triumph of whig principles in the
hour of danger. The history of Republics
that have existed before us, furnishes nu
merous parallel examples. It was the for
tune of the Whig party, from the com
mencement of our government* to adopt the
principles of the Constitution and the U-
nion, and they will be relied on in all times
of trial, when the mushroom creeps of the
hour sink into insignificance. To adopt
those principles, then, to the exigency of the
times, is not only a duty, but becomes us as
patriots. They were not made for a day,
but for all time. The past, and the present)
demand of us the consideration of this fact
in the future.
From personal feelings, and political as
sociations, I supported Gen. Scott, warm
ly supported him. -Independent of party
policy, however, opposition to Mr. Pierce
Spirit Rappings Authenticated.
A few uights since, within this week, a
young male friend of ours, who, from a
was induced from the discordant, unnations ; sneering skeptic, had become a devout bo-
al, factious, and in some degree, daugerou-1 fiever, retired to rest, after having his ncr-
combinations which rallied to his support.; V ous system partially destroyed with the
They were sufficient to excite distrust, if not | information, through the spirit of his grand-
alarm at the time, unacquainted as one j mo i her, that he would become a powerful
might be supposed to be, with the moral ; medium. He was in his first comfortable
fortitude of the man who was made so sud
denly the recipient of their united efforts
snooze when a clicking noise in the direc
tion of the door awoke him. He listened
And certainly the recent newspaper para- intently; the noise was still <r 0 ing on—very
graphs which represent Mr. Pierce as en- like the raps of the spirit on the table in
deed !
‘Who’s there V
There was no answer, aud the noise stop
ped.
‘Anybody there ?’
’No,’ was the answer.
‘It must have been a spirit,’ he said to
himself. ‘It must be a medium. I’ll try
—[Aloud ] If there is a spirit iu the room
it will signify the same by saying ‘aye’—
no tnat’s not what I mean. If there is a
deavoring to form his Cabinet so as to re
concile all conflicting claims, is not calcula
ted to produce confidence in his statesman
ship. A Cabinet formed to suit the views
of every grade of politicians, to satisfy fac
tions of every caste and form of opinions,
with doctrines as antipode as the poles,
would be a wonder even in modern Democ
racy—a thing that might be worshiped for
it would not be like anything that ever ex
isted. Nor could it exist beyond an hour,
from the monstrousness of its absurdity.
And it will probably be well for Mr. Pierce
that it cannot. For no good could be ex
pected to come out of such a Nazareth ;
while elements dangerous to national safety
would have an ascendancy in places where
they should not—men be at the head of af
fairs, no matter how popular with a small
portion holding opinions of their peculiar
stamp, could not, and would not be trusted
by the country at large. They would em
barrass, if not destroy the popularity and
success of any Administration that will give
them place and power. For those reasons,
it seems to me that the only course Mr.
Pierce can pursue with credit or safety, is to
discard all ultraism from his counsels; give
place to men of broad, liberal, comprehen
sive, and enlightened views, from all sec
tions, whose policy would be safe, progres
sively safe, and who would command the
confidence and respect of the nation. If he
does this, I cannot see anything at this mo
ment that should prevent our giving his
Administration a f ir trial, unless it be the
restrictions ofparty ties, which have already
lost their beneficial influences, and left noth
ing with us but their evils. We are not
bound by these now; and if Mr. Pierce takes
even reasonably conservative grounds, with
principles of a high national character, we
shali be at perfect liberty to lend our sup
port to him. It is only meting to others
what we should ask for ourselves. Those
who sacrificed the obligations under which
we recently rested, cannot expect that we
should tread a thorny road, while they pur
sue a primrose path of dalliance.
In our local elections, at this time, there
is uot and probably will not be, any impor
tant principle to control them. Having
done our duty, our whole duty to the coun
try, and the party, it remains that we should
do our duty to ourselves. L Be true to our
selves,' is a golden rule, aud it behooves the
Scott men of the Whig party to take heed
of it. There first duty therefore, is to stand
firm ! united ! linked together ! Their safe
ty, influence, and power to command res
pect demand it. The severe trials we have
undergone as comrades, will insure it. We
are not responsiblefor the past—we will not
be arraignedfor the future. Will the U nion
Democrats dare do it? Answer then by
pointing to the Convention of the loth July
last. Will the Webster whigs crown their
monument of bad faith, with a collossus of
impertinence? What hostage can they give
us for the future? Will they forsake their
tutelar saint, by taking a step backwards?
Let them remember the 17th of August!
These have deceived us once—that was their
fault; if they deceive us again it will be
ours!
Many centuries ago, when the Austraiu
family gave kings to Spain, it was a custom
with their counsellors, when deciding upon
important policies, to say, ‘Let us consult
the spirit of Philip the Second!' It was a
wise and safe maxim with them—it may be
so to us. Let us consult the spirit of Wash
ington—of Clay. And wherever we may
be found—in whatever position we may do
battle—with their example before us—with
the spirit of their great acts inspiring us, our
fellow-citizens may be assured we shall be
for our country and her best interests.
HAMPDEN.
spirit in the room, will it please to rap throe
times ?’
Three very distinct raps were given in
the direction of the bureau.
‘Is it the spirit of my sister?’
No answer.
Is it the spirit of ray mother ?’
Three raps.
“Are you happy V
Nine taps.
‘Do you want anything ?’
A succession of very loud ra[9.
‘Will you give me a communication if I
get up ?’
No answer.
‘Shall I hear from you to-moroow ?’
Raps very loud again ; this time iu the
direction of the door. He waited long for
an answer to his last question, but none
came. The spirit had gone ; and after
thinking on the extraordinary visit he turn
ed over and fell asleep.
On getting up in the morning he lound
that the spirit of bis mother had carried ofi'
his watch and purse; his pants down into
the hall, and his great coat off altogether.
Taking It Coolly
The Detroit Advertiser tells a capital sto
ry of an easy, good-natured old Vermont
farmer, who never suffered troubles to per
plex or worry him, and found a silver lining
in the darkest clouds. The anecdote is
quite refreshing in this hot weather, aud
so, commending its philosophy to all wbo
are plagued with worldly vexations, we
copy it:
One day, while the black tongue prevail
ed in the State, one of his men came in,
bringing the news that one of his red oxen
was dead.
“Is he ?” said the old man : “well, he al
ways was a breeeby cuss. Take his hide
off, and carry it down to Fletcher’s it will
bring the cash,”
An hour or so afterwards, the man came
back with the news that “Lineback” and
his mate were both dead.
“Are they?” said the old man; “well I
took them of B to save a bad debt
that I never expected to get. It is lucky
it ain’t the brindles. Take the hides down
to Fletchers—they will bring the cash.”
After the lapse of another hour, the man
came back to tell him that the high brindle
was dead.
“Is he ?” said the old man ; “well, he
w r as a very old ox. Take his hide aud take
it down to Fletcher’s ; it’s worth cash and
will bring more than any two of the
others.”
Hereupon his wife, who wa3 a very pious
soul, taking upon herself the office of Fli-
phale, reprimanded her husband very se
verely, and asked him if he was not a a
ware that his loss was a judgment of heaven
for his wickedness.
It is !" said the old fellow 7 ; “well if they
will take the judgment in cattle, it ts the
easiest way to pay it.
“Your house is on fire!” bawled a stran
ger, rnsbing into the parlor of a sober citi
zen. “Well, sir,” was the calm, slow re
joinder, “to what cause am I indebted for
the extraordinary interest you seem to take
in the affairs of my house?”
One of the laziest men in this country
resides in Iowa. As a sample of his inertia,
we would mention that the only reason he
don’t get married, is because he is too lazy
to “stand up.” Whenever he feels like gap
ing, he employs a little boy to puli his
mouth open.
A lazy fellow who was reproved for ly
ing in bed every Sunday, by a clergyman,
said, “I am sorry that a gentleman of your
profession has forgotten that the Sabbath
was appointed as a day of rest.”
“Jack, which is the way to Epping.’’
“How do you know my name is Jack?” “I
guessed at it.” “Then guess vour way to
Epping.” *
A country ’squire asked a juggler why he
played the fool? “for the same reason you
do; out of want. You doit for want of wit:
I for want of money.”
A schoolmaster asked a boy one cold
morning, what was the Latin for cold, at
which the boy hesitated, saying, “I have it
at my finger’B ends.”
An auctioneer at a sale of antiquities put
up a helmet, saying, “ladies and gentlemen,
this is the helmet of Romulus, the Founder
of Rome, but whether he was a brass or iron
founder, I cannot tell.”
A spindle shank fellow inquired of a tin
man whom he intended to quiz, if he could
fit him to a pair of tin boots? “Yes, air,”
said the tinman, (taking up two candle
moulds,) “these will fit you exactly.”
Mr. Speckles says, that the best vegeta
ble pill that has ever been invented, is the
apjje dumpling. * For destroying a gnaw
ing at the stomach, it is the only pill to be
relied on. Dat’s a fack.
A Cincinnati paper says that a magis
trate of that city joined in the holy bauds
of wedlock, eleven couple in one day last
week. His hand being fairly in, he thinks
he can double the number each day during
the present week, if called upon.
A Jew paying particular attention to hara
of bacon, when asked what he was saying to
it, replied, “I was saying thou almost per-
suadestme to be a Christian.”
A bankrupt who drove a pair of dun .
geldings met an acquaintance, who observ
ed to • him, “I see you drive duns, but I exr
peeled that duns would drive you.”
Addison was in the habit of keeping one 7
hand behind him, and upon being asked
the reason, said he “wished always to
beforehand in the world.”
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