Newspaper Page Text
BLOOD TOISON!
100 Bottles of Another Blood Medi
cine Used—No Belief Until
B, B. B Was Ust'd
Hampton, Cta.. June lUth, 1880.
Blood Balm Cos :—Your R. R R. Ihh work*
<1 od uie like a charm. Thro* lK>ttlew lmvc
lone me more food than all doctors anti 100
oUlenof the mint hated remedy 1 . lam gdt
iiiK well rapidly. All ulcers in aid uo aoliiiiK
f mfbonea, no pains in i try buck, ana my
kin is becoming clear. The efYeet of H. li. R.
imy kidneys is won if thing wonderful. Mv
friends are astonished. My family physician
\vh it is tlio only medicine 1 ever used suited
omv case. I would take pk asure in corn's
•wilding with uny one iideresttd, ns 1 can’t
m lj> Draisin k H. li. D. Indeed it is a great
Blood Puritier. Give anyone my aadress whs
may call for it. ' A 1' \V
Address, BLOOD BAI.M 00.. Atlanta, Ga..
lir Summerville, Ga.
Swfulii Cured liter Several Physician
FIRM.
On the 28tli day of April,. 1883. William Sea
lock, 12 years of nge, presented ninwolf to Dr.
Gillam, deairing to know if B. li. li. would
cure him. 11. lives on Dr. L. A. Onlld'i
place, near the cemetery, ami the case is well
known by Dr. Guild, who has particularly
noticed it.
The hoy hud a foul scrofulous ulcer involv
• .ug the entire elbow joint, with which he had
Ih-cii ftflh-’tcd over twelve nmiiUiß. It had d< -
• aftroyvdthe auncrtlciiil structure, and was fast
approaching the deeper tissues. He could not
I*. ml tho arm, and had stiong indications of
the same ulcerous condition of tho shoulder.
Two oth* i physuiaus of the city had treated
the ease, hut without any perceptible chunks
in his condition. He was placed upon the
treatment of li. li. li , and one single lottle
cured the foul ulcer and restored the fast de
generating condition of the child, and ho it
now enjoying the finest of health.
This is a plain and nnmistaUahlo easy of
w> !l defined scrofula, and recognized ns such.
* :■ and with on< smgU- i ottle *if B. 11 IV. and
he take pleasure in asking any iiit. vested jiarty
to address Dr. L. A. Guild, Atlanta, Ga., on
the huhject lsiati\u value .of tho medicino in
this case.
If one well defined ease of scrofula oau la>
cured, others can he cured also.
BLOOD BAI.M OV,
Atlanta, Georgia.
r IS THAT SO?
Yes, it’s a fact, that otic large buttle of B. B
H. costing onlv 61 is warranto 1 to produce to
mu and. remedial effect in the cure of ail Blood
t'ois in as throe botti.a (if tin- most fan mm
blood Hiedioilies of tho day. Yea, three t
one ; that's tho way we put it, and we ar>- ahli
t< back our word with strong evidence. B. B.
li. is the auick Wood remedy, and there is m
mistake about it. The proof is printed -the
fiat has gone forth—-the tocsin hi.s been souul
•and, and ‘*bo that hath ears to hoar, let him
hear.”
F r s !e in Su •vmervflk' i*y
•T S. CLI (THORN Si CO.
Nerve-Life andfe,
- HESSTOBJTIi.
P Howard K!r(r.ii
-ftogflHic Shtaid
ft > tt] j.ih do. > i tY • If. if’
center* Trig jv :p
A ___ , i £k#la ei * i.nlL i
t OF THE / p ... iHI
*fi &P 3 As3 Si -1 ‘ MUiftn ' W : f
I *•. (
'V. 3 lillf•*?:
M!kWi O WA 0 , 1 r7£ loi ’• i
| j ■' "7?
\ 4 V * Oruars
1 Patented Teh: 80, * ** • -.
vnrso from iriy irv*?- -v: " !. t
nerve fore- and fail to attfln strength.
MIDDLE-A4Kr> MW m *r. | ;i < a vigor, Mr I ut
lug it to the progress of >tar..
The MOTHER, WIFE aud MAID, ’itT.-ntiirfr m
Female. WcuituuM*, Ner 'mi# Debility andother nil
dent*. will dud it the only ore
.To one ami all we. ry that tins Shield gjves a nat
ural "id in a natural wiv
wmiorr i>rb(*(vg the sd^macti
ItarrwutFd One Year, uud tin bet
Uppltunec niwde.
Illustrated Pamufitel. Til BEL TYPES •>F MEN |
also Pamphlet f->r Ladies only, bent on reunplo
U., m.u|| umealeil, FREE.
American Gah/anic ftc,
OFFICE | Iltl3 ClMfitllfit M.'.
SSWBKBSBTV. fetiiaEßHaßKWHf S'
Ouly a Small Ball,
A good many people, withont really
feeling any special animosity to boys,
like to sec their exuberance meet a check,
now ami then. Such persons would
have achieved some measuro of satisfac
tion a few days ago, if they had ob
served an incident that occurred on one i
of the streets on tho Back Bay. A purty
of girls, each about a dozen years of
age, were proceeding quietly home from
school, when one of a group of boys, of
aliout the same age, “fired" a snowball
from the opposite side of the street, and
struck a member of the first party
pinmply in the ear. His merriment at
the accomplishment of this feat was vio
lentbut short lived, for the girl who had |
been smitten by the missile handed her
books to a companion, and came flying
over the street after him with eyes |
aflame The boy, perceiving this per
sonified vengeance lienring down upon ■
him, incontinently tied, tmt, being in- ;
cumbered by robber boots, he was soon
overhauled and captured. A vigorous
“wrastle” at once ensued, and shortly
the youth, although using his best en
deavors, found himHolf Upon his back,
with snow in his ears aud down his ;
neck, and his face tingling from sevetal
vigorous slaps. As soon as he was al
lowed to get np he rushed upon the girl
in a rage, Vint was deftly caught by the
leg, and again upset and treated to an- '
outlier done of the same medicine. This |
time he was content to accept the sitna
tion, whereupon his punisher walked ;
calmly away, without having started her
pulse ii single I •eat by the excitement of
the mcidon on Journal
A Western Tarn.—Col. E. G. Cooper
has told the Denver News a hairbreadth j
escape he had from death in the jaws of
a Colorado mountain lion. He was
skating on a lake near his gofd mine, and
the lion sprang for him. There was a
chase for some miles, the colonel occa
sionally getting the beet of the lion by j
making a suddea curve. At length one
skate liegan to loosen, and he felt that
the supreme moment was at hand. He
had heard that music might soothe a
brute, and lie began to sing; but this en
* raged the lieu, and, bethinking himself
of a rival newspaper he had in his
.. -pocketybe .drew it forth and read the
lion to sleep,
£l)c (Dinette.
VOL. XI.
JiOSK OF KILL ABNEY.
| Oh ! fair are vour daughters by Bhaunon'a blue
wfttom,
And lovely tho maidens of Clare and Clon
mel ;
And look tho world over, Ton’ll fail to discover
Such colleens to lovu as in old Erin dwell;
| Yet there's none on the island, in lowland or
highland,
From the toft-bosomed lakes to tho wild
ocean shore,
Who praises could share with, or half way com
pare with,
Dark Nora, my roso of Killarney, asthore!
Ah, Nor ah's the beauty to love’s more than
duty,
in the glance of her eye there’s a charm and
a spell,
And her voice, like the linnet, has love’s mean*
ing in it,
And ringa through my heart like a mnnien
bell.
Oh, to woo and to win her would turn saint to
sinner ;
Her beauty oompels you to kneel and adore,
But with sighing and suing in vain you come
wooing
Dark Nora, my rose of Killarney, asthore !
You hear me entreating with 1. > wildly beat
• ing,
You know bow I love you, and sail feign
surprise !
I fear you’re deceiving, with glances still wcav
mg
Those snares for mv life in your beautifu
eyes.
But no! your lids glisten with tears as you
listen,
Oh, fly to my bosom and leave mo no more !
1 I’ve but this to give yon, love, a heart fond and
true, love;
Dark Nora, my rose of Killarney, asthore !
ADoubleMlsiiiHltTKlaiHling
One iluy iu hint December Mr. Hamit
| car Thnrnlove found his bootn soaked
through, and taking them off in bis store,
lie flung them down to dry. It was an
; act of trilling importance to any but a
i very discerning mind. Yet it was
\ fraught with dire consequences to Mr.
i Thornlovo. But wlmt ooulil he know of
i the future, poor soul?
“What poor soles they make now-a
days l" he murmured. “I will put on
my slippers and step into my neighbor
Jnstout. and see if he can’t settle his
account to day."
He was a mau of his word and did so.
While he was gone, in came his
friend, Paul Hobbleden, aud asked
where Thornlovo was. no was tolil to
wait ft few minutes, and while he was
waiting, as he was only an old bachelor,
accustomed to look only after his own
health—he drew off his boots, toasted
his toes for half an hour, aud then, an
gry at waiting so long, hastily shod hiu -
self, and wont away grumbling.
Thornlovo soon after returned, also
cross. Justout was not iu, and now ho
heard that Hobbleden was gone out.
This made him doubly peevish.
"Hobbleden gone I I wish ho would
stay gone. That mau bannts me three
times a week at the house and as often
hero. I have known Hobbleden ever
since before I was married, and he knew
Ophelia before 1 married her 1 Perhaps
that’s why he never got married. Might
tie. HtiekH to me like a barnacle. Af
ter me so often and nothing particular to
say. Perhaps he comes to see if lam
here, that he can go to soo Mrs. Thorn
love. I’ll watch Hobbleden 1 How the
snow stretches boots I" He drew them
on.
When Thorniove went home that even
ing he felt ugly aud tantalizing. Ho
hart caught cold from going in his slip
pers. Ophelia played a pathetic air on
the piano and sang to soothe him.
“Don’t do that, Ophelia. Oh, don't
Pd rather hear a funeral sermon."
“Thought you liked sentiment.”
“Hate it."
“Shall I sing something funny ?”
“No, you think more of fingering that
old music-trap than you do of me."
“What shall l say?”
“Anything—or nothing would suit, me
better,” he growled. “Pm bound to
have a row !’’ he reflected.
“You’re as odd as auy old bachelor !’’ j
“Don’t yon like’em ?” said he. “Hoi/- j
bleden is one of them.”
“But he’s an old friend of ours. ”
“Of ours?” emphasized Tliornlovc.
“I should think so. He’s here enough.” j
“I suppose the poor man don't know j
where to go,” said Ophelia, sympa
thetically.
“I should think he did know where to
go—he goes here, that is to say, he
comes here, as regularly as an old owl
to its roost. ”
“It can’t be that you’re jealous of
Paul Hobbleden, can it?—u man that
you've known for so many years ?” said
she, curiously.
“No, it can’t,” replied he; and then
thought. “Ah 1 she’s trying to pump '
me, but she won’t”
“I have to he pleasant when he
comes; mustn’t be inhospitable, must
I?”
“Of course not. Oh, of course not.
He’s something of a bore, though.”
“So are all old bachelors. I wouldn’t
give you for a hundred of him. Ha,
ha ! Old Hobbleden !”
“She's laughing at my simplicity. ;
Thinks I don’t know it. I’ll keep my
eyes open, night and day.”
Paul Hobbleden returned to Thorn
love’s store in about a week. Tbis time i
limping.
“A confounded com kept me away so i
long. ”
“Shouldn’t wear tight hoots; When
a man gets to he dandified it’s a Hign he
is in love. Who’s to be the happy Mrs, !
Hobbleden i”
SUMMERVILLE, GEORGIA, WEDNESDAY EVENING, APRIL *2, 1884.
“Don’t joke.”
"Don’t wear tight lioots.”
“Don't yon know any remedy for a
corn ?"
“Out your too off?”
“You are inhuman 1”
“Any old baohelor who is dandy
enough to wear tight boots ought to have
Dorns all over him.”
“Had—hail he? Good morning!”
■tied Hobbleden, exasperated. "I'll see
f I can’t find sympathy somewhere
slse.” Aud away he went.
“God liless tho oorn I” thought Thorn
ovo.
“Why don’t Mr. Hobbleden come to
see us, I wonder ?” that evening said
Ophelia to Mr. Thornlovo. "1 declare
it seems lonesome without him.”
“You’ll have a chance to keep feeling
lonesome for some time to come. Ido
not think lie’ll ever darken these doors
again."
“Yon don’t rneau he’s dead?”
“Not quite, my love; he was lively
enough this morning; ho was corned,
Ha, ha I”
“Intoxicated? Poor fellow ! Lonely,
I suppose.”
“Poor fellow! That’s pretty well. If
I had boon drunk it would liavo been
horrid monster. He wasn’t intoxicated,
lmt hud a corn on ouo of his dear toes.
I joked about it, but ho went off in n
rage."
“Ho is very sensitive; corns are pain
ful. I’m sorry.”
“I’m glad. It will Vie oompany for
him, now that he don’t see you.”
“You make yourself so disagree
able 1 ”
“So is be. Uncomfortable to him
self, too. Wears tight Iniots to mako
liis feet look small.”
“That was needless; 1 always noticed
bo had very small feet.”
“No smaller than mine,” suid Tliorn
love, elevating a foot. He prided him
self on his small feet.
“Ilia arc two sizes smaller, at the
very least,” said Mrs. Thorniove, re
vengefully. "Yes, nearly yours
are like horse-ears compared with
his!”
“This is unbearable!” he exclaimed.
“Always pitying and praising ITobhle
den, always neglecting and sneering at
me!”
“And you are eternally hinting ”
“Don’t tnlli to me!”
“Nor will I; hope you’ll have a nice,
sweet, quiet night’s rest, after all this!”
And hlio hurried tearfully to her
chain her.
"I reciprocate just what you mean,”
he bawled after her, aud went scowling
to his private couch.
Mrs. Ophelia Thornlovo did not ap
pear at the breakfast table next day.
Frederick musts! gloomily over his
lonely coffee.
“I was foolish, very, such a
fuss about my feet." He held them up
and frowned at them. “Now that I
take a partial view, they are really none
of the smallest! Besides, the right
trotter-case looks longer than the other.
If I hadn’t bought, ’em, shouldn’t sup
pose they were mates. He pulled his
pants up. “By ginger! they aro not
mates! One’s shorter than t’other.
And I hope to lie happy,’-’ ho added,
with increased earnestmisK, as he exam
ined tho leg of one, “if here isn't tho
name of Paul Hobbleden! This is a
discovery! Oh, powers of darkness,
who bring so much to light! How disw
It happen that Hobbleden’s boot is on
my leg ? Is the thing called Hobbleden
a man or u monster ? Or am Ia lunatic,
and this name, Hobbleden, no name at
at all ? J t is not my boot. How could
it come hero unless Hobbleden walked
in with it? But now—now —” and he
struck lilh eye softly with liiH frenzied
fist—“now, I have it! Hobbleden’s
boot has betrayed him. The fiend in
mortal shape must have been in this
house last night! Oh—Ophelia!"
He rang the bell and his servant,
Babble, canto.
"Babble, take care now what you
say don’t tie alarmed though I
believe I have always treated you as a
father would a brother—l mean as a
brother would his son—darn it, you
know what I mean—answer me truly;
was or was not Paul Hobbleden, my
particular friend, in this house last
night? Take care I”
“No, sir ; he hasn’t been for a long
timo.”
“Was he here for a short timo?”
“No sir, not at all.”
“Babble, that’s a lie. Did you black
these boots this morning?”
“I did, sir.”
“Did yon black my others ?”
“No sir, I did not, sir. No sir.
“Look at that leg.”
“Paul Hobbleden,” said Babble,
reading.
“Precisely, And of course that boot
belongs to him. Now, how could it be
here unless he was ?”
Babble swore that if Hobbleden had
been in the house, somebody else must
have let him in, after he, Babble, had
gone to bed.
“Babble, you may go—that is, you
may stay, in my employ. But mind you,
don’t say anything of this to my wife—or
I’ll discharge you."
Babble turned pale and faded out of
sight.
Mr. Frederick Thnrnlove was very
solemn for several sullen, watchful days.
One day he came home and found
Ophelia painting a watch-case. At first
she tried to hide it. Then she said it
was intended as a surprise for him.
With a ghastly smile—he said he know
that 1
The horrible oorn gave Paul Hobble
den snob dreadful pain that finally ho
repaired to Mr. Chiropedowski, the
great oorn-dootor aud Polish exile. Ho
gouged it out for him, with heroic lack
of emotion.
“But these little trifles sprout again,
don't they ?” said Hobbleden, handing
the count a greenback with a saw-horse
on it, emblematic of the cross he had
borne.
“You must wear boots that fit,” said
the chiropodist. “Were those made for
you ?"
“Of course I or they wouldn’t lmvo
pained me 1" said Hobbleden, sarcasti
cally. “One wouldn’t.”
“Your feet are not of the equal size—
eli?”
“More likely tho boot,” oomparing
them.
“They bees not mlttes,” said the sur
geon.
“True 1" exclaimed Hobbleden.
“Never noticed it boforo. Blamed the
snow for it; but they looked like mates
when I bought them. I’ll go and blow
up tho shoemaker, to make sure.”
At tho shoemaker's he had a ferocious
controversy, but was at last persuaded
he must have changed the boots since
tho purchase especially as ho now rec
ollected he did take off his boots in
Thornlove'tj warehouse one wet day.
"Must have taken Thomlovo’s lioot—
feet are small like mine. But there ib a
pair of breeches between mo and my un
feeling friend, and I soorn io call and
ask him for my property. Lot me see.
Host thing for me to do, without, being
humilated, is to wait till jThornlovo gets
to bed, and then go and ask Babble to
go up and change the boots,”
That very night with mingled thoughts
of wife-murder aud suieido, subsided
among the surging feathers of his soli
tary bed, tho jealous Frederick Tliorn
love. If to die woro but to sleep no lesa
comfortably, he would gladly have taken
in his arms a sea of feathers, aud by re
posing ended himself. He addressed
himself to sleep, but she refused to em
brace so vindictive a person. Wakeful,
therefore, near mi dnight he heard some
body opening his chamber door.
“ Can it be the brazen, false Ophelia ?
No; it is a heavier weight. Blessed if it
isn’t Babble, actually coming in here. Is
that you, Babble?”
“Yes, sir,” faltered Babble. “Thought
I'd shine your hoots to-night, instead of
iu the morning.”
“Take ’em. Don’t come up again.”
“No, sir.”
And tho servant joyfully hurried down
with them to the kitchen.
“I'll bet a bale of greenbacks that
Hobbleden is in the house and has brilied
him to get that boot, I thought that
man would be coming, finally, and now
I'll overwhelm him I”
Thorniove went down in his stockings,
and listened at, the partly open kitchen
door. Hobbleden was really there.
“That’s a mischief making article!”
said Babble to Hobbleden, who was
drawing it on. “I came near losing my
place on account of it; Mr. Thorniove
saw your name in it one morning, and
thought you came to the house secretly )
and that I knew it. Ho suspected that
I had shined your hoots and his together,
and had blundered when returning them.
Separate apartments for him and her,
this long time, you see.”
“Good gracious I" whispered Hobble
den in a cold sweat of horror; “could he
suppose so ?”
“But now that you have been telling
me how you took off your lioots one wet
day in his store, it is all explained, and
I’ll ease his jealous mind to-morrow.”
“I have awaked from a horrid dream,
at, last I” joyfully reflected Thorniove, at
this unexpected disclosure; “I’ll mako
amends at onco. Gome to my bosom, my
dear old Hobbleden 1” he cried aloud,
rushing into the kitchen in his gown aud
stockings; “I have been long bewildered
by a false dream, but now I know the
naked truth, all things are on a proper
footing, and everything is as it should
lie.”
Hobbleden did not reject the affection
ate salutation of Mh old friend, who,
after a further revelation of their mutual
sufferings, insisted upon sharing his
couch with him that night.
They slept serenely and when they met
Mrs. Thorniove at breakfast, in the morn
ing the only point upon which they dis
agreed was, that they denounced while
she blessed the boots which had exorcised
from her household the groeu-eyed mon
ster forever 1
Bed Flags of Attraction.
A newspaper agent called upon Mr.
Closetist the other day in a business
way.
“Oh, I don't want to advertise,” said
Mr. Closefist. “I have a regnlar run of
customers, and strangers are attracted
by my red flag on top of my honso.”
“All right,” said tho agent. “Just
continue doing business that way and
some of these days people will see a red
flag in front of your house, but they
won’t Vie attracted by it. They will be
alt,racted by tho bell that the town
crier is ringing as ho walks np and down
before your store.”
That agent was something of a phi
iosoplier.
THE LONDON SENSATION.
A HUIII.ir NC AM l)A I. IN HIGH I.IIIC
—ill IMS POIiTENCUIC’M SUIT.
Tlio Fiiiiioiin II rear Ii f Promise Cane
Analutit Lot'll Gtiruioyle.
Miss Fortesene’s action against Lord
Gurmoyle, In London, is rapidly as
suming the dimensions of a public
scandal. Tho Loudon World sin's (lmt
the conduct of Lord aud Lady Cairns
has been base, treacherous and nuohrls
tian.
They deceived the girl into thinking
herself accepted. They fooled her with
false hopes. Then, when the rupture
came, Lord Cairns suggested £2,000.
His lawyer induced him to consent to
£5,000. Beyond this ho would not go.
Society is waiting anxiously for the trial.
Lord and Lady Cairns will enter tho wit
uoss box. Lord Garmoyle’s letters to
his “blue-eyed darliug” will bo read.
Public opinion regards him with con
tempt. Ho has gone abroad. His name
has been withdrawn from the books of
clubs. Tho suit iH for £50,000.
Miss Fortescue was a pretty and
popular young actress, with a personal
reputation that scaudal has never as
sailed, when she attracted tho attention
and won the heart of young Viscount
Gnrmoylo, tho eldest sou aud heir of
Earl Cairns. The course of true love
did not run smooth at flrst,, hut in a little
time it was announced that Lord CuiriiH
had consented to the match, and early
last summer tho formal betrothal ot the
young couple was announced. Miss
Fortescue left the stage as a preliminary
to the marriage, which waa to lake place
as soon as Lord Garmoyle had finished
his education. Siuce the engagement
was in ad e knowu the lovers have fre
quently been seen in public together. A
fow weeks ago a rumor that the match
was ofl was started, but as Lord Gar
moyle and Miss Fortescue subsequently
attended together a performance by Miss
Mary Anderson the report was set down
to envy.
That Lord Cairns would be entirely
satisfied with the alliance was hardly to
bo expected. Sinoo tho retirement of tho
Earl of Shaftesbury by reason of old ago
Lord Cairns has been the recognized
loader of the evangelical party. It is
not likely that either he or his wife, who
is a daughter of tho late John MoNeile,
a wealthy Belfast banker, and niece of
the Bov. Hugh McNeile, the celebrated
evangelical preacher of Liverpool, lias
ever been inside a theatre. Their coun
try planes of Lindisfarne, near Bourne
mouth, and Milden, iu Scotland, nre
seldom visited by even the leading mem
bers of tho Earl's own party, in eouse
qnencejof the soverity of tlio praying
there, and he lias regularly presided over
tlio meetings of the Society for tho
Propagation of tho Gospel iu Foreign
Parts. His eldest daughter, too, is mar
ried to the Itev. Neville Sherbrook, a
London preacher. The youtlis of his
family took a different view of things
and have histrionic tastes, which have
found active expression.
A Dive Story.
A romance of A. T. Stewart’s life is
told by the New York correspondent of
the Pittsburg J)inpalnh, About sixty
years ago Cornelia Clinch was one of the
prettiest girls in New York. Her father
was a rich ship chandler who lived in a
big house in the fashionable quarter. lie
was a self-made man and thought every
man ought to be the architect of Ih'h
owu fortuue. So he frowned away every
wealthy young fop wiio came to woo Cor
nelia, and sent her regularly to school
to learn to be a sensible, useful woman.
Old Clinch attended St,. Mark's Church,
and one Sunday young Stewart saw the
daughter there. He fell in love with
her and became a regular attendant at
tlio church. He got acquainted with
Cornelia, and as he was poor but indus
trious, the old man smiled upon him and
invited him to call and take dinner with
them. After awhile Stewart asked Cor
nelia a very interesting question, and
she, like a good girl, blushed aud said :
“Y-e-e-s —if papa says so. ” Then Stewart
visited old Clinch, and ho said : “Want
to marry Nelly, eh? Think she’s got a
rich father, eh? And you’d likotocome
in for a share of his earnings, oh ?” “No,
sir; yon needn’t leave her or me a cent,
I’ll soon be richer than you anyway.”
“Yon will, will you? Weil, I like that.
Go ahead and take her then, and Heaven
bless you both.” So the young folks,
who were tremendously in love with each
other, were married and wont to live in
a modest little cottage on Reodo street,
and were glad to lie able to cover the
floors with rag carpet. There, it is said,
they lived an ideally happy life.
Stopped It. —In announcing the dis
continuance of its morning edition, after
one mouth’s trial, the Baltimore Day
says: “We have acquired a circulation
of about, 4,000, and there is every indi
cation that in the course of a year wo
might increase this to 8,000 or 10,000 ;
hutmeanwhile we should have sunk 880,-
000 or SIOO,OOO, and still have a paper
which must for several years ho run at a
loss, while our people were awakening to
the fact of its existence, and concluding
to give it their advertising patronage. In
the matter of advertising, we have prac
tically received no encouragement what
ever.” The evening edition is still pros
perous,
NO. 11.
LOUIIS MHO LIKE OUR I AM).
gimllli Noblemen ft lin nre Deeply liiler.
rnli’il iii Amelienu AgiTeuUilral Itenl
ICntute.
The largest owner of Inndjfbought in
recent years iu this country is Sir Ed
ward James lleed, M. P. for Cardiff,
Wales. He has purchased in the last,
ten years 2,000,000 acres of well soU cted
cattle-grazing hind in Montana and Da
kota. Sir Edward Reed is practical
man aud the founder of his own fortune,
which ho got out of the iron and coal
mines of his native Wales and the till
mines of Cornwall. His investments in
this country directed many others to our
public domain who had great confidence
in his sagacity. Next, in consoquence is
the purchase last year of 1,800,000 acres,
consisting mostly of pine hind in the
State of Mississippi, though included in
this holding nre 400,000 acres of the
finest agricultural land ou the continent,
lying on tho Yazoo river bottoms. This
magnificent property belongs to the
firm of Philips, Marshal k Cos., wealthy
oorn factors of Mark Lane, London,
who aro also tho largest dealers in
American wheat and other grains in
England.
Next iu consequence comes tho Grant
estate, which includes an entire county
in Kansas, and lias within its bounds
350,000 acres. This probably is the
most desirable landed estate held by a
single owner iu America, as the land is
rich, well watered, and settled mostly by
emigration farmers from England aud
Scotland. Alexander Grant, the owner,
has laid off’ all his lands into farms,
built about 400 good farm-houses, each
with the necessary out-buildings, aud is
conducting the estate just ns though it
was north of the Cheviots instead of
America.
The Duke of Portland owns about
500,000 acres, part of which is on the
North Platte iu Nebraska and part in
Colorado. Not much of it is yet iu cul
tivation. Lord Stafford owns 100,000
acres on the line of the Northern Pacific
railroad, and he is gradually colonizing
it and getting it into field cultivation.
Lord Dunraveu is the pioneer of the
English nobility in American land-own
ing. He bought the well-known prop
erty iu Colorado called by him Dunraveu
Park in 1808, and at government prices.
Dunraveu Park contains aliout 100,000
acres. The first purchase was 00,000,
and subsequently 40,000 acres more
were added. It is one of the best cattle
ranches in America, being a lovely val
ley, full of pure streams fed by moun
tain springs, rich in tho best cattle
growing grass known, and the whole
property is feuoed iu by mountain
ranges. It is now easily worth SI,OOO,
000, but Lord Dunraveu refuses to sell
it at any price. Lord Dunmore owns
10,000 acres not far from Dunraveu, and
very much the same character of land,
which is rapidly improving. The Duke
of Beaufort is one of the four owners of
400,000 seres recently bought by En
glish gentlemen in the Fan-Handle of
Texas, aud Sir John Roe-Reed is another
of them, the others of interest being
two rich bankers' sons. There are many
other Englishmen who have from 1,000
to 2,000 acres in Colorado, Texas, Da
kota and New Mexico.
No Changing Works There.
You never had a chum, did you ? asked
the bad boy of the grocery man. If you
ever had a chum that you loved, that
had stood by you in all kinds ol weather,
who would work his finger nails off for
you, and go without eating and sleeping
to mako you happy, you could uever talk
that way. My dram is just, as tender as
a woman, though ho was strong as a
giant, afore tho rhenmatiz struck him,
and now he is ns weak as a little tiny
baby, and wo have to handle him just
as though ho was eggs. Every hone, and
muscle, and drop of blood, aud piece of
skin aliout, his body is just like ma’s
neuralgia, and sometimes they all ache
at once, and thou they take turns ach
ing, and my chum lays there and takes
it as calmly as though he was at a pic
nic, and never grumbles. He smiles his
great big old-fashioned smile when he
sees mo looking over the foot-board of
his bed, and when I go up and put my
hand on his face, and wipe tho perspira
tion off his forehead, the tears come roll
ing down his cheeks, and he tries to
raise liis helpless hand to shake mine,
lint ho can’t, and ho says, “Hollo, old
pard,” aud then he shuts his eyes and
the rhematiz commences whore it loft
off and goes to grinding him up again.
Gosh, if I could pull off my shirt anil
things and get into his bed and take his
place, and let the rhenmatiz get in its
work on me for a day, while my chum
might go out and slide down hill or kick
over a few barrels, and feel bully for
awhile, I would enjoy it. But yon can’t
change works with a fellow that has got
rhenmatiz.— Peck’s Fun.
Some colloge boys after dark took an
entire load of wood from a farmer’s sled,
left in the street over uight, and with
great labor piled it up in a citizen’s
woodshed under the impression that
he'd lie charged with stealing it. They
now find that he had bought the wood
and they havo saved tho farmer so much
work, and they want to find out who sug
gested the joke and how much tho farm
er paid him.
This is leap year. It seems as though
all the years are leap years, as they jump
by so rapidly.
QUAKER CITY JOKES.
A FEW TIIINOM AtTIDENTAIiTiY OVEB-l
lII'.AUII lV TIIK PHII.AUBL.PUIA
“JiVKNINIi CA1.1.” IIUMOUMT.
WESTERN RAILROAD SYSTEM.
First Western Railroad Mau—“l soe
it stated that a commissioner Ims been
sent over by tho Bussian government,
aud Is coming West to study our railroad
system."
Second Wostern Railroad Man—‘‘Yes;
but I don’t sec why the Russian govern
ment should goto all that trouble.”
First Railroad Man—“ You don’t?”
Second Railroad Mau —“Certainly
not; our system could havo been ex
plained to tho Russian government by
any Western mau who happened to bo
over there.”
First Railroad Man—“ That’s true; I
did not think of that. It could be dono
with a paper and pencil by just ranking
dots to represent towns and lines to rep
resent the roads, same as on a map.”
Second Railroad Man—“Exaotly, and
writing under it: Cut-throat rates be
tween competing points must be made
up by big charges on local traffic.’’
RESTORING TUETB CONFIDENCE.
.Tolies—“Lend me tivo dollars?”
Smith—" Can’t do it. Just paid out
my last five dollars for a big advertise
ment of property stolen.”
Jones—“ Stolen property?”
Smith —“Yes. I offered SB,OOO re
ward for information that would lead to
tho conviction of the thieves who en
tered my house and stole a lot of jewelry
and other valuables', including a $25,000
diamond necklace. ’’
■Tones—"Sec here, I happen to know
that you never owned S2OO worth of
jewelry in your life.”
Smith—“ Hist,! My creditors don't
know it. 1 want to restore their con
fidence.”
THEIR VALUE APPRECIATED,
Mrs. A.—“ You will have to get Johnny
anew high chair, dear.”
Mr. A.—“ What is tho matter with the
old one ?”
Mm. A.—“lt is broken in such a way
that it can’t ho mended. lam sorry
about it, because such chairs are high in
price, but Johnny must have something
to sit on, and we can't let him use tho
dictionary or the family Bible.”
Mr. A. —“Certainly not; no need to.
T will write to my friend, the Senator,
aud got him to semi me some public
documents at once.”
A GREAT DIFFERENCE.
“Yon say that Mr. Smith gave you
twenty dollars for officiating at his wed
ding, and Mr. Brown only gave yon two
dollars ?” said the wife of a clergyman
to her husband.
“Yes,” he replied.
“That seems very strange,” continued
the lady; “Mr. Smith is a clerk on a
small salary, while Mr. Brown, I have
always understood, is a very wealthy
man. ”
“He is, my dear, but this is the
second time Mr. Brown has boen mar
ried.”
FAMILY PRIDE.
Little Nell—“ Your family ain’t half so
stylish as ours. ”
Little Maud—“l’d just liko to know
why it ’taint.”
Little Nell—“ ’Tause we've dot an old
family ghost, an’ dey is awful stylish.”
Little Maud—“l’ooli ! That ain’t
nothing. We’ve got something more
stylish than that. I heard mamma talk
to papa about it.”
Little Nell—“ What is it?”
Little Maud—“A skeleton in the
closet. ”
WAITER OF HEALTH.
Mrs. D.—“ Who would have thought
it?"
Mr. D.—Thought what ?”
Mrs. D.—“ln this article on ‘Health’
the writer says it is far wiser to sleep
till one wakens naturally.”
Mr. D.—“Oh ! I know that long ago.”
Mrs. D.—“ You never told me.”
Mr. D. —“Your memory is very short.
Haven’t I told you hundreds of times to
let mo sleep uutil the fires are fixed, the
children dressed, and breakfast ready to
put on the table?”
His NAME.
Circus Manager—“ Well, everything is
ready now for getting up next season’s
posters and handbills, except your
name.”
Elephant Keeper—“My name ?”
Circus Manager—“ Yes, you have not
given that to me yet.”
Elephant Keeper—“ You know very
well that it is Don Ciesar De Noronni.”
Circus Manager—“Oh ! that will never
do. That was your name last year, and
you remember, you were killed by th
elenlmuts last fall at St. Louis.”
NOT GUILTY OF ANYTHING.
“Prisoner, you stand charged with
murder in the first degree. Are you
guilty or not guilty ?”
“I killed the man, your Honor,
but—”
“I asked you are you guilty or not
guilty of tho charge preferred ?”
“Let me explain. As I said, I killed
the man; but I committed the deed
while 1 was temporarily insane.”
“Oh, that puts tho affair in a differ
ent light I You are discharged, sir.”
France and Egypt.— France’s propo
sition, made through M. Waddington, to
land troops at Suakim and march them
to Khartoum to relieve that city, leav
ing the ultimate settlement of the Sou
dan question to a conference of the
Powers, is a generous and magnificent
offer, but hardly helps England out of
her scrape, as it contemplates the sub
mission of the whole subject of domin
ion in Egypt to the judgment of Europe.
This time France strikes while the iron,
is hot. Herald.
“I will accept anything else in poli-s
lies as a necessity, but save me from a)
post office fight in a smalltown,”
claims a Congressman. “They surpass)
earthquakes and cyclones,”