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I
NORTH GEOfi I "1 TIMES.
Vr.’ V.MAwSnn.'l *««•»*■* Ff*l>rtetMr»,
♦
THE FUTURE YEARS.
In *11 (he fntore years, wy sweet
(Now ruses blossom at thy feet,
Aful time flies by with footsteps fleet)—
But in the future ycai-s, grie??
What lives for ns, or joy or
A happiness beyond belief,
Bright smiles or bitter lears ?
In all the future years, my own,
Shall one of us be left alone,
Missing the other's loving lone,
. Throughout the fnlure years?
Orsbifll we bo together, where
Together wo may glaiVy share
Each other’s hopes and fears ?
The fnlnrc yews—ah! who oaii say
Wliiob of us two will pass away
From earthly hope and lore for ay#, ,
From ail that Faith endoarsf;
I billy breathe a pray’r for thee
That where I am, there thou may’st be
Thro' all the future years!
Ckcil Lorraine.
A. Loye Story.
The Reverend Dr. Melton was just be¬
ginning to feel at home in his new par¬
sonage when he was surprised one even¬
ing to receive a call from bis classmate
Harvey Leigh. In college days they
had been friends, and for a while after
their ^graduation vmits;*lmt they had exchanged
letters and the letters and
visits had^ome to an end long ago, and
it was many years since they tet.
After some conversation on g®eral
matters, Dr. Melton said:
“You have a son, I beliovo, to per
vduate the name ?”
•Onoson—an only child, Morton is
ttventy-four, and reading law in my of¬
fice. A bright fellow, too; never gives
me a moment’s uneasiness; always at
work; steady-going; no * boyish nonsense
about him.”
“And when is your boy to. marry ?’’
caked the doctor. •m
“Ob, it is not quite arranged yet.”
“So you arrange marriages in-Phila¬
delphia? And this particular marriage
is not quite arranged? Humph! I
don’t understand that sort of thing, tip
in tho oonntry it is, ‘Mary, I love you,’
and ‘Jack, I love you in return,’ and
then my services ate called for. How
does one arrange a marriage in Philadel¬
phia?”
The touch of sarcasm was quite lost
on Mr. Leigh, who had crossed his legs,
and sat absorbed in thought, frowning
at the patent-leather tip of hia neat
shoe. His host watched him until ho
uncrossed his legs and looked up,
“Have you any daughters, doctor ?”
he asked.
“Two of them."
“Grown up?”
“I hope so; otherwise they will tower
over my head.”
“And do you understand them?”
asked Mr. Leigh, with a gravity that
made the parson’s blue eyes twinkle and
the corner of his month twitch.
“ Oh, no, I don’t understand them;
I don’t understand any creature in petti¬
coats ; but my daughters are good
girls, and their mother assures me that
they arc remarkably gifted. What do I
want to understand them for ?”
“It might be an advantage under
some circumstances,” Mr. Leigh re¬
marked.
“ What is the matter ? What girl do
you think it might be an advantage to
understand ?”
“My ward,” answered Mr. Leigh.
“Sho is an orphan, a far-away cousin
of my wife, and sho has lived with us
for the past five years. She has a nice
little fortune; she is pretty; she is welL
bred-”
“ That goes without saying,” muttered
the parson, stroking his long beard.
“But she hasn't a grain of common
sense.” Mr, Leigh roso, took up a posi¬
tion on the rug, slipped bis left hand
under the short tails of his cut-away
coat, and gesticulated with his right as
he warmed to the story. “ Last sum¬
mer,” he began, “she was twenty-one,
and just out of school. She went to
Cape May with the Phippards, people
in whom I pieced the utmost confidence.
I thought she was safe with them; but
lo and behold 1 she must make the
acquaintance of a young gentleman who
held the responsible position of book¬
keeper in one of our large hardware
shops, a retail oonoern, and he has sold
many a paper of tacks over the counter.
I was in Europe; so this Interesting
tack-seller ran down to Cape May every
Sunday, and staid until Monday. Then
he had a clerk’s two weeks’ vacation,
and he spent that at Cape May. I came
back in October, and before I had been
home twenty-four hours who should call
at the honse but this young man ? He
wanted to see me. aud I saw him, and
was informed by him that he had wooed
aud won my ward. I asked if he pro
posed io take Let to live over the shop.*'
Mr. Leigh’s thia lips curled down
ward; ho glanced at the parson lor sym
puthy, but he on countered a steady,
PLiftiE. S3 ,1
SPRING GEORGIA, THU AY E 11, 1885.
—
somewhat - critical^ ook. Br. jfelton
took the pipe out of his mouth anil blew
a cloud of smoke upward through his
mustache.
"Why shouldn’t thoy live over tho
shop?’’ “Oh, ho said. don’t
jou understand,” Mr.
Leigh exclaimed, fretfully. “She has
boon brought up in. luxury, and she
onglit to haVo eorno Idea of what is
proper and fitting. There has Uoen a
Icrriblo iiifio. Why, I assure yon I
have had tho sympathy of all Philadel¬
phia. This . hardware man had the
effroriftSry to say tha( he had. money
to take care of a wife, just as
though ho lmd never thought; ©f my
ward’s litllo fortune. Ho begged mo to
go and see his explorers—people. I* I
never dreamt of—and told him tipit
I did not want thoir rccomm’lndations;
[•did'not propose to hire a bookkeeper.
TnjPs HjyiMB insolent, and I ordered him out.
she blazed away at me, the weak,
infatuated girl. I tried to season wit&
her; my wife talked to her; my* son— p
Well, you see, my son wanted to marry
her too, and he would have made just
tho husband for her, but she told him if
h£>poko to her she would ask her hard¬
ware As though mau to Morton protect her. Thinjc of it 1
would insult her—
tho best-manuered man that ever lived.”
Mr. Leigh had growr? excited. His
cigar had gone out, and he relighted it,
drawing at it fiercely until the end
burned bright like a bit of coal.
“And Morton is very fond of hor,"
he continued—“so fond of her, in fact,
that he is waiting like a hero for this to
blow over. I think the farce is nearly
ended, for the hard waro man became
partner the other day in a nail factory
or something of that sort, and a week
ago he sailed for Earope. He will have
to stay a year, traveling for his firm,
and when he comes back—-” Mr. Leigh
broke lid*ver off to srailo astutely and to drop
the his left eye.
“I don’t exactly understand your ob¬
jections to him,” said Dr. Melton,
slowly. “Does he drink, or keep low
company?”
"No,” answered Mr. Leigh; “but—’’
“I beg your pardon,” said the doc¬
tor, interrupting him, “but I want to
speak in his behalf. He must be indus¬
trious, and no fool, and prospering, or
he would not have jumped into this
new position. I confess I don’t think
you have made out a clear oase. Of
course you want to see your son happy;
but if she does not love your son that
ends the matter. And if she does love
this other man, and ho is honest and
upright, why should he not have her ?”
“He is not her equal," Philadd^Sjt” sqkfigMr.
Leigh. “You know in
The parson rose up with a stifled ex¬
clamation that, coming from a layman’s
lips, might have sounded profane.
“It is warm in here,” ho said. “I
want a littlo fresh air; I am not used to
a furnace-heated house. Poor girl 1
Tho city has not yet claimed me for its
own, and I miss the fire-place in my old
study. Poor fellow !”
He threw up the window and looked
out on a wide expanse of tiny high
fenced back yards; but overhead was the
clear sea of sky, where the moon rodo
at anchor amid the fleet of stars. Ho
stood there drawing in the crisp Decem¬
ber air, until a tap sounded on the door.
“Come in,” he cried, and one of bis
daughters entered—a tall, slim girl with
Her father’s blue oyes.
“Papa,’’she said, pressing close to him
and smiling mysteriously, “there are
some poople in the parlor.”
“Drawing-room, my dear,” said tho
doctor. “ Wo are in Philadelphia.”
“We are not, but no matter,” she re¬
turned. “I tell you there are some peo
plo in the' parlor, and I think it is our
first town wedding. Sho is very pretty,
and she has on the loveliest little bonnet
yon ever saw. Go marry ’em quick, and
let me be a witness, only they have two
•ritnesses with them.”
He passed his arm about hor and
rissed her, she did not know why; then
t«*d her to his goes’
“Mollie, this is a classmate of mine.
My daughter, Mr. Leigh—Mr. Harvoy
Leigh, of Philadelphia, You must ex*
c;n30 mo for a.few minutes.”
He went into tho adjoining parlor.
Ves, it was a wedding party, no doubt,
out the would-be bride and groom did
aot look like the brides and grooms that
seek out a parson in such a fashion.
The man was a gentleman, with a fine
face and dignified bearing. The girl
was pretty, but more than that, she had
sn air of courage, of self-reliance; she
was not a weak piece of pink and white
^ e8 b. An older couple was with them,
; * somewhat frightened middle-aged man
{ a ™ry nervous middle-aged woman,
evidently his wile, for she clung to ms
< rtrm helplessly.
am William Dunbar,” said tha
maD - Tho parson shook hands
with to hiru tho - young “ An,i thl8 lady, > ’ ho “is ad ^ Miss d « l Kate ““‘
!n B
Petty. We are both of age—in faot, I
am thirtyrihree—and 1 hope you will
1)0 good enough to marry Os.”
, Mr. Dunbar was very much inearnast,
tmt he Bmiled a little. “Our marriage
m sadden,” ha added, "because I most
rad'for Europe to-morrow, and I want
to takBlfcy wife with-mo.”
. The parson looked at him, then at the
girl Her eyes snot his steadily, though
a faint flush stole into hor alicoks.
“Where is your homo ?” fie asked.
“I. have none,” she answered. “I
have neither father nor mother. I have
beeh living in Philadelphia with my
guardiau.” Tho words waro spokon
softly, but her eyes flashed. "I am free
to do.as I please,” she went on. “My
guardian has no right to dictate any
longer,”
‘ilium f” said Dr. Mellon, passing hia
hand over hid board. “And yon are from
Philadelphia too?” ho added, turning,
% Mr. Dunbar.
“I am,” wag.the onrt response.
"Your name sounds familiar,” said
tho parson. “Oould I have seen it the
other day in a list of '^sSengers fb*
Europe ?”
He scanned the faces before him.
The man's jaws clioked, the girl’s flash
deepened into crimson.
"We are free to marry,” said Mr.
Dunbar. “There is no reason why we
should not be man and wife. If yon
won’t perform the ^oromony, I shall
ftud some one who is willing. We have
with ns my nnelo and aunt; but tbero is
no use in wasting words. Will you
marry us?”
"Yes," said tho parson. Then he
asked a few formal questions, and mar¬
ried them according Id the ritual of the
Dutch Church. Ho begged them to be
abated for a miuute, while he filled oat
tho certificate. This made it necessary
for him to return to the atm
"A runnaway country a
Mr. Leigh.
"I can't swear to the*.^
the parson a ,08 s
floats out of
__ 'tie
•T Wohdor you
tho eeromony,” Mr. Leigh remarked,
“I should think it was a great risk to
marry runaway couples."
"The risk is greater without it,” said
the parson. “If I don't tie the knot
somebody clso will, and it is generally
a satisfaction to one to know that tho
knot is tied. In this case, however, I
am quite sure I am doing right. Do you
believe in physiognomy ?”
“To a certain extent, yes.”
“Well, so do I, and I am confident
that 1 have just married $ sweet girl to
a man who is worthy of hor.”
He wont back to the parlor with the
certificate, taking pen and ink, so tha
tho witnesses might sign their names,
Mr. Dunbar phook him by the hand,
leaving a note in his palm. The bride
scoilcd shyly upon him, and the elderly
woman bowed; but tlft elderly man,
who so far had not spoken a word, said,
suddenly, “I tell yon, sir, that you will
i.evor regret having helped this mar¬
riage."
“I don’t, believe I could have helped
it,’’ said the parson, with a droll glance
st tho now-made husband. "I might
have been the means of deferring it, but
Mr. Dunbar intends to take his tyrannical wife to
Europe in spite of a dozen
guardians and dozen more reluotani
clergymen.—God bless you and make
you happy 1” he added, taking the young
wjfo’s hand.
ner oyes filled with tears, but her
husband drew her hand through his arm
aqd led her away.
Two carriages wore waiting outside.
One went to the north, the other to the
south; but tho parson watched the one
ihat went to the sontb, for in that sat a
man and woman whom he belioved he
had made happy for life, so far as wedded
bliss brings happiness.
He returned to the study, gave the
wedding fee to his daughter, who bore it
off iu triumph to her mother, and then
he refilled his pipe.
“Does this sort of thing happen often?”
said Mr. Leigh.
“Not precisely thia sort of thing. The
bride and groom were not girl and boy;
neither did they belong to what you
would call tho common class. Br-the
wny, it was a Philadeiphia’party, a Wil¬
liam Dunbar—”
Mr. Leigh started from the chair
“ Dunbar 1” he repeated. “ And the
girl?” “Kate Perry—Katherine, rather.”
Mr Leigh stared at him vacantly. “My
ward 1” he cried, in sudden anger. “And
after all I told you 1 Why didn’t yon
sail me in there ?”
“ How was I to know that ?” said Dr.
Melton. “You never mentioned the
name of your ward or lover. You simply
called him the hardware man.”
Mr. Leigh walked out of the library,
took his hat and stick, struggled into
his overcoat, and left the house without
vouchsafing another word to his host.
The parson showed him out, and looked
___ft._______________
walking Uy down tho moon
lit street. When Ikwent to his study
again ho bad by nofieans tho craven
air of a man who halftone a dastardly
l On tho contrary* ho laughed out
^ l*y as he sat clown ajliis desk, whore
oh the notes of his sermon .-Mar
«>c/s Weekly. '
JB- ..... . ...... —
Thought Ho Was Wanted.
- - -------- -
A practice! detective can frequently
‘•fogacT discern at a glance that a man is a
The stamp of dishonesty on his
features, or his anxioty on boing ob
eerwfi, tells the story. A remarkable
illusftatiou of this fact was narrated by
th#9§oaton correspondent of toe Bing¬
ham, Journal a year [or two ago. The
dative was Constable Derltetus Clapp,
the etweosjsor o! “Old Reed,” a famous
Kigffccatcher of Boston half a century
ago, who was for forty years the terror
of evil-doers in and about the New Eng
mi flhfip metropolis.
was a shrewd man and a most
:belfcnt judge of human nature, Ha
•aid tell a rogue ns far off as he oould
tell a black man, and he never made
es. His “come along with me”
.porative and admitted of no argu
V
instance of his readiness In read
■ karaoter occurred one morning in
pper criminal court. A case of
considerable interest was being tried,
am he gallery was crowded with speo
o or three reporters were sitting
the door, when Ciapp stooping over,
flT QCt 1 -»
-■"i on’t all look at once, but please
t- Ye that nice-looking man with the
wu cravat, in the front middle seat
of i gallery.
, ' joked. “Now/’says Clapp, “I'll
", 11 can set that man traveling out
iourt house on the donble-quiok
ban five minutes nor will I leave
m or send him any message, ”
e we were wondering how the
| to be accomplished, the veteran
Vieokoned to Officer Tallant,
it'pSrIt’aiknffeufls from his
pocket, directed that officer’s attention
to tho party in the gallery, and appar¬
ently gave him some directions,
Tallant opened the door and stepped
into the entry, and at the same instant
the gentleman with the white cravat
bolted like lightning through the crowd
to tbe door, and disappeared
"Gentleman,” remarked Clapp, “I
never saw that man before in my life.
It illustrates the soriptural Baying. ‘The
wicked flee when no man pursueth. » »»
On a Mackerel Vessel.
Says a New York reporter, describing
one of the maekerol fleet:
“ The Henry Morganthau was as clean
as any yacht, and cleaner than some.
Every bit of woodwork was scrubbed
like the floor of a Dutch kitchen; tho
cabin where tho captain and five men
sleep was fixed up with fancifully stained
woods, which in turn were covered with
highly oolored pictures of young and
charming maidens, all with oyes very
wide open, and features very prominent
and amiable. Of the eighteen men who
from the Bcliooner’s crew, twelve sloep
forward in the fo’o’s’ie, and that apart¬
ment, wliiob was as scrupulously neat as
tho cabin, was rendered even more cheer¬
ful and homelike by the presence of a
big cooking stove, a cook, and many
iresh-baked custard pies, whioh were
scattered arouud on potato barrels and
berths to oool off. All the men eat
down there together, and the cook (a
fisherman six feet tall) was hard at work
modelling biscuits out of a big sheet of
white dough with the help of a cover
from a tin spice box. Barrels of fresh
water divided the available space with
barrels of things to eat, aud thepresenoe
of 100,000 fresh mackerel paeked in ice
only a few feet away was revealed by the
faintness of the fishy odors, enough to
give things a touch of reality.
“But this odor furnishes the fisher¬
men with as much fish as they want,
and they rarely think of taking mack¬
erel or any other fish except through
the nose."
The Egyptian Soldiers.
. The letters appearing in the English
journals relate that the Egyptians,
whose oonrage has been so often
doubted, fought like lions on board
those armed river steamers on the Nile;
in fact, they never broke down save
once, and that was when they heard of
the fall and sack of Khartoum. Then
thoir hearts sank, and even Kashu-el
Mur and his officers prostrated them¬
selves on the deck and wept like chil¬
dren. In the disastrous retreat from
Gakdul ■ to Korti the wounded owed
their safety to the Egyptian soldiers,
who carried them every Btep of that
| j weary way with whioh a secured patience, Lord tenderness Wolsc
J a nd fidelity
ley’s praise,
VOL V. New Series. No. 18 .
RUSSIA AND HEit FINANCES
FAPTN THAT TI!K PRKnKNT WAUMIiU
OPTI.OOK CIAKKS INTEItKSTtNU.
Where the C«ar Cnn On Fund* to Carry
Chit a War.
. [From tb sw York HeraUl.1
England has ibout
Russia's financial ability to^S
protracted war. As Russian go
down British confidence in the power of
gold goca up. “Bussia," she thinks
fondly to herself, “will Boon bo unable
to pay her soldiers, and then where will
she bo, when sho can’t borrow any in
Europe?” Misleading reflection; for it
must not be forgotten that the printing
of ruble notes is a highly dovelopod art
in Russia, that the monasteries are
still in a flourishing condition, and the
Russian people arc in that happy state
of civilized development where enthu¬
siasm for tho Czar makes them forgot
easily Bcanljjationa and poor pay.
There is a good story told in connec¬
tion with one of Czar Nicholas’ loans
from tho wealthy monasteries. The
patriotic fathers of tho Petsherskaia
Laura, tho renowned cloister built over
the catnoombs at Kief, lent his majesty
five millions of rubles for whioh they re
oeived a bond entirely written by tho
imperial hand, and whioh for twenty
years they reverently preseived in
a jewelled casket. One day Nicholas’
successor, Czar Alexander, visited the
famous cloister desirous of looking at
the dooumentB relating to Russian his¬
tory treasured there. The prior, think¬
ing that a favorable opportunity had
oomefor obtaining payment of ibe loan,
took the precious bond from its casket,
and with a profound obeisance, handed
it to the Czar. Alexander, so tho story
goes, pressed the precious parchment to
his lips and exclaimed, “In this yon
possess indeed a treasure worth ten times
the sum it represeutg," and gazed fondly
on the linos traced by His father’s pen.
The prior’s heart bounded with joy.
He hoped that the Czar would immedi¬
ately order tho payment of tho bond,
but tbffiis crushing sorrow the EmpvuJr
handed it back to him, “his voice
shaken by emotion," with the words,
“No, no; I will not rob you of your
priceless treasure. Keep it as a snored
object. It is my father’s own handwrit¬
ing—you have not purchased it too
dearly.” The monasteries exist to-day
and are iu many oases possessed of vast
wealth, whioh in case of war would in
all probability be placed at the call of
tho government.
Floating Homes,
“As wo j neli Canton," writes a
Chinese col indent of tho Home
Journal, “one of tho strangest sights of
this strange land is the vast wilderness
of bouts which servo as the only homes
of a floating population of more than one
hundred thousand human beings. As
our steamer made its way slowly through
tho city of boats to her wharf, it seemed
as if half of Canton was afloat on the
water. .All around us were acres on acres
—yes, square miles—of junks, moored
iu blocks and squares, with long streets
or canals between thorn; while darting
hither and thither were hundreds on
hundreds of others carrying passengers
or freight. These boats are of various
sizes and shapes, and aro partly covered
with bamboo matting, the one gw two
apartments furnishing spaoe for parlor,
kitchen, dining-room, bedroom, wood¬
shed, barn, and idol-shrine. There mul¬
titudes of men and women, parents and
chiidreu, grandparents aud babies, find
a home, each boat often sheltering more
souls than Noah had iu his ark. There
thousands aro born, grow up, grow old
and die, seldom being on land until car¬
ried there for burial. Many of these
boats are manned by women and girls,
whoso large, unbound feot prove that
they are not 'Chinese ladies;’ and yet
they have learned to ‘paddle their own
canoe.’ Babies are fastened to tho dcok
by strings; and other ohiidreu wear life
preservers of gourds or bamboo to keep
them from sinking, if they fall over¬
board, though the parents don’t seem to
grieve much if one does get drowned,
There are larger and more gayly decor¬
ated junks called ‘flower-boats,’ used as
floating pleasure-houses of no good rep
ntation. A few years ago a typhoon
swamped thousands of these small craft,
and hundreds of the inmates were
drowned.”
Mb. Gladstone’s Peculiarities.—
Despite his worries, everybody re¬
marks Mr. Gladstone’s good spirits.
His step is more jaunty and his air
more dudelike jhan it bas been in a
long time. He visits the theaters often,
interviews Miss Anderson in the green
room, and . ho himself escorted Irving
into the distinguished strangers’ gallery
the other night. But his voice bas
grown very weak, the least exertion ren.
dors him hoarse, and he has lost muck
of his authority.
JOKKS FOUND ASTRAY.
IM/aiOKOTH N TUB
CUL.VS1NM OF OP KXCu
A Tramp who F.at «rn*a-A W Me*
Chilli-A Unaslnn War r<un K T Al
tornej’n Jake. F.«c., Etc.
■.
EATING GRASS,
It Was one q{ those bit ter oold
the oldest settlor ira
am Bp when any¬
thing is said about the desire of tho mer¬
cury to hide itself in tho bulb, and the
wind whistled an air from Wagner as it
tore through tho trees. Yet out in the
cold night, before a cottage door, stood
a trembling figure. He softly knocked,
and in a moment the door was opened
and a kind face appeared, while a gentle
woman’svoioo asked: “What is it, my
poor njan ?” “Madam ” said the figure,
“all I ask is to brush away tho snow
herd in front of the house and eat some
61 the grass.” “No, my poor man,”
answered the geutI<f >oice. “Though I
am a woman I still have a heart. Do
not eat that grass. Qo round to the
back of the cottage and you will find
some And that the kind is much form more disappeared, nourishing.” the
door was dosed and the wind whistled
another Wagnerian air ,—Boston Post.
A RUSSIAN WAR SONG.
We’re coming, Alexandrovitoh, at least a mil¬
lion more,
From KanineaUaeJn’K iiay aud Olnkalagouba’s
shore.
From Kimtkouskie’s frozen wild from Tyms
kala’s plain,
We’re marching Alexander, with all our might
and main.
From Gatmonsekino’e forest, from Tsokerbor
beakoi'g vale,
From NVafsiaRcurbska’a blooming fields, from
Oiym.-liia’a dale,
From Kukamaj'jga'a villages, from Meclouschar
ski’s isle,'
We’ro coming Alexander, the weary rank and
file.
From polysyllable riliage, wo Vo marching gay
ly down,
I’erekance to rot In Afgliauland to gild
jour orown,
We’ro on to Borg-el-MurgUab, and ronjachirt
tel:—- - -
And we’re headed by some gonorals whose'
names no tongues can speak.
From provinc s and villages whose naruos be¬
fore the oyo
Loflk like a heap of consonants shoveled into
“pi.”
We-arolows and off aloes, -offs and offs and
vilchos,
For Holy Church and Pious Czar will die in
Herat's ditches.
AN ASSENTING WITNESS.
Justice (oolored)—“When I said dat
de mau wasn’t straight what did you
say ? ’
Witness—“I said dal's so.”
Justice—“And when I said dat de
man was crocked what did you say ?”
Witness—“I said dat’s so.”
Justice—“And when I said dat de
man wasn’t upright what did you say ?”
Witness—“I said dat’s so,”
Justice—“And now yon swear you
didn’t say de mau wasn’t honest ?”
.Witness—No more I did. I fought
you referred to do rnmatics de man
had.”—JVtio York Advertiser,
A COMING EVENT
\Vife_01d Mrs. Bentley told mo con¬
fidentially this morning that she ex¬
pected shortly to become a grandmother.
Husband (absent-minded)—Is it pos¬
sible 1 That old woman. —Few Orleans
'limes.
A CLEAR CASE OF LIBEL.
Brown (to lawyer)—“Smith called me
a fool jackass in the presenoo of wit¬
nesses. Isn’t that remark actionable?”
Lawyor—“Yes, it is libellous, cer¬
tainly. Did he say any thing else ?”
Brown (anxiously) — “He said he oould
prove it.”
Lawyer—“That won’t make any differ
er.co/'
Brown (relieved)—“AH right, if you
are sure of that. Go ahead and sae him
for S500. ” •
GREATEST KIND OF AN INSULT.
Alice—“Isn’t that queer? This book
of travels says the worst insult that can
be offered to a Russian maiden fs to
spread tar on the front gate r § resi¬
dence. ”
Maud—"I should this* it would bean
insult.”
“But why? Oil, you mean it is a
personal reflection. ”
“No; it probably means that she can’t
get a bean, and bas no qse for the front
gate,”—Philadelphia Call.
the NEW BOARD OF TRADE.
“Ob, papa,” said the broker's litt’
daughter, as they walked to the Lake
Shore Depot, “what a splendid building
that is—that one with the clock in the
steeple and the ship on top and the
stained glass windows, I mean. What
church is it ?”
“That isn’t a church.”
“Is it a Sunday school room?”
“No, not exactly, my dear, though I
bolieve the precious little lambs are
somotimes taken iu there.”— Chicago
Herald.
