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The Great Cow Case* Rollins 7 cow, it seems, while feeding on the common, got through a place, alleged by the defendant to have been purposely left open, in the fence of McGlue’s garden. She did some dam age, but was driven out, and when McGlue remonstrated with Rollins about the predatory and incendiary tendency of his cow, Rollins replied with declamatory and unparliamentary language. Thereupon McGlue went up 'and sued him for trespass, and swore to push the case to the last extremity. McGlue’s lawyer, Poddery, went right to work, and when Rollins heard about it, he got his lawyer, Hopkins, to bring a countersuit for conpsiracy to entrap the cow. McGlue then told Poddery to open out a second suit for damages done to eight fence raiiings and a post by Rol lins 7 cow, and Rollins also made afresh start in another suit against McGlue, in which he claimed $15 for the ruin of his cow’s horn by McGlue’s grape ar bor. This seemed to McGlue so auda cious that he ordered Poddery to in clude in his claim the market price of four cabbages and a bunch of parseley that the cow ate. He said he would have let them go as of no account, if Rollins hadn’t proved himself such a conscienceless scoundrel. But this last movement exasperated Rollins to such a degree that he went over and got old Mrs. Muldoony tQ make an affidavit that she saw McGlue milking the cow while it was on his ground, in the wash boiler. Armed with this affidavit, llopkins had McGlue arrested, and he was held in security to answer a charge of petty lar ceny. When McGlue called to ask Poddery what should be done now, that eminent lawyer was out buying a house with the fees that he had already accrued from the great cow case. Hopkins, at that moment, was paying off ail old mortgage with his fees. When Poddery came in, he said things had now reached a crisis. McGlue’s clear duty was to throw him self upon his country and stamp out this fiend who wa$ pursuing him with malignant Jury. After talking it over for an hour, Poddery took out the papers in another suit, which McGlue accused Rollins of breach of the peace in permitting his cow to wake Mrs. McGlue’s baby in the very crisis of the mumps, by its “moo ing;” and still another in which McGlue claimed compensation for the brick which he heaved at the cow, and for the manual labor expended in the effort. Rollins retaliated by arresting McGlue for corrupting the morals of Rollins’ boy, Jim, by the use of pro fane and scandalous language while he was striving to eject the cow. As soon as McGlue entered bail, he told the squire that he would call in the morning to enter suit against Rol lins for permitting his cow to butt down McGlue’s pig-pen. Rollins overheard him, and at once made an affidavit, stating that the shock of the encounter with the pig pen had given the cow brain fever and so deranged her mind and so unstrung her nervous system that she was now in the habit of coming homeward, up the hill, tail foremost, in such a man ner as to excite general derision. The two suitors le f t the squire’s of fice together. As they passed through the doorway, Rollins jostled McGlue’s elbow. McGlue jostle 1 back again, and Rollins struck him. They clinch ed. It was an awful combat, and each was taken home on a shutter and put to bed. A week later friends brought them together and made up the quarrel and the suits were all withdrawn. A fortnight afterward, Poddery dis. trained McGlue for his fees, and left him an empty house. On the same day, Hopkins sold Rol lins out cow and all, and he had to be gin the world clean over again. Both of them think they will be calmer when they have another cow- case. that the discoverer was only trying to hoax some one into making a fruitless trip into the mountain. No credence was given to the story until lately, when responsible parties visited the designated locality of its existence and reported its actual discovery. On the north side of the mountain, about quarter of an acre is covered with mass of loose, unstratified rook, none of which are of any considerable size, All was covered with a heavy mass of moss, which now is all torn off. No trees grow upon it, only here and there a few r small bushes. Removing the loose rock, ice is discovered in small quantities. A thermometer stood 90 degrees in the sun, 86 degrees in the shade and 48 degrees when placed in the rock, on the ice in their crevices A cold air is present in the crevices? but no strong freezing currents are re ported. Hundreds have visited The rocks are torn up and the ice is only obtained now by going down some little depth in the rocks. We would suppose from observation that the mountain is a vast heap of rock, portion of whose left side is more broken or loose than the rest. The porous nature of this portion w’ould ad mit through its moss covering a con siderable amount of water, infiltrating between the stone, would form ice in just the manner w'e find it. The ice just formed would be protected from all external temperature by the non conducting properties of the vast sur rounding mass of rock. The ice moun tain, we would suppose, is nothing but a huge natural stone refrigerator. The common refrigerator depends for its preservation of ice upon the good non conducting materials of its sides. So the ice mountain would naturally, though wonderfully, preserves perma nently its ice by the vast amount of rock—good non-conducting material— which forms its sides. Lool:ing lor a Lost Child. AGKICCLTUKE. Indian Barbarity. It is well known that some of the In dian tribes of America have a habit of killing horses when their chiefs and medicine men die and in some instances the departing braves’ wives have been dispatched to bear them company to the happy hunting grounds. When the celebrated Ute chief Walker died, in the northern part of Indian Terri tory, a good many years ago, a whole band of horses were slain by his war riors. But heretofore no one had sup posed that the Indians of this section had interest enough in the future life to prepare an escort for their departing braves. The death of a buck near To- quervllle a short time ago shows that the oJd chief who begs biscuits at that settlement is blooded. He forwith decided to kill a squaw to accompany his favorite warrior, but the squaw- getting a hint of her intended funeral, hid herself so effectually, that no clue could be got of her whereabouts. As the time allowed for the sacrifice was rapidly passing, the old chief, in order not to be defeated, selected a three year old papoose, which he took from its mother, and buried it in the grave of the deceased. The head of the child was left projecting above the ground, so that it could breath, but he allowed no one to go near it till Bishop Britig- hurst. discovering a commotion in the tribe, traced out the cause and saved the life of the child after it had been in the situation described, two or three days. The mother of the child was afraid to tell what had happened, though she was observed to be grief- stricken. The Toquerville people thought seriously of burying the old Lam&nite w'ith his head the other way, but he insisted the religion of the Plutes required him to do what he had done. • An Ice Mountain. The ice mountain of Preston County, W. V. is a great natural curiosity. We went to Rowelsburg. then by steam three miles up Cheat River past Vicks burg, and out upon the Northwestern pike. Following it two miles west we came to the ice mountain, situated on the right hank of Flag run, one-half mile from the pike, A picnic party was being held at the base of the moun tain. After refreshing ourselves with a very cold drink of water from the Twin Springs, we ascended the side of the mountain for some distance and arrived at the ice field, w’here we found Drs. Kemble, West, Shafer and Schooley contemplating the wonder. It is claimed that the ice mountain was discovered by some soldier in the spring of 1864. Its discovery was afterward reported again but persons supposed Picking her way through the wagons and vehicles that crowded Chestnut and Main streets, St. Louis, an old w'rinkled-faced woman, neatly dressed in a light calico dress and w hite apron entered the Ch estnut street police sta- sion, and, approaching the office railing asked of Sergeant Watkins with a true Kentucky accent: “Have you seen my lost child, cap tain ?” The evident fact that the woman was at least forty years beyond the usual age of the mothers of “lost children” somewhat puzzled Sergeant Watkins, who however, overcame his astonish ment sufficiently to ask: What is your daughter’s name?” Beckey Raney,” answered the worn an. “And her age?” “Seventy years,” again she promptly answered. “What is your name?” “Jane Raney.” “How old are you?” “One hundred and seventeen.” “And are you looking for your lost child who is seventy years old? w “Yes, captain, you see Becky will go on sprees. Last Friday my gal went to the dispensary to get some medi cine, and neyer come home since. She will go on sprees. Sergeant Watkins informed Jane that the officers had brought in no “young one” of that mime and age. After finishing her business with the sergeant the reporter approached her and the following conversation en sued : “How old did you say you were?” “One hundred and seventeen.” “And your lost daughter Becky?” “Seventy.” “Why you do not look so old—you have all your teeth yet.” “Yes, l got a good many of ’em, but thar all decayed but two. I’m sure I’m one hundred and seventeen years old* l was horn In Kentucky, in—let me see —I forget the year—in 1762. I can tell you all about Washington’s war, and I can tell you all about the earthquake at New Madrid, for I was there. I was married when I was seventeen, and I’ve got three husbands buried at Al ton. When I came to St. Louis, a long while ago, thar were no steamboats and thar were only log cabins here. I’m pretty poor, now. I would have starved to-day, if it wasn’t for an old lady that lives near me on Second and Cedar. She gave me five cents this morning, and I bought bread with it. I only had coffee and sugar myself. I guess Becky has gone on a spree. She works out aud makes $3 a month.” Komian Proverbs. The wolf asked the goat to dinner but the goat declined. A fox sleeps, but counts hens in his dreams. The wolf changes his hair every year but remainsp. wolf. Dog, why do you bark? To frighten the wolves away. Dog, why do you keep your tail be tween your legs? Iam afraid of the wolf. Love, fire and cough cannot be hid den. Make friends with a hear, but keep hold of the axe. Everything is bitter to him who has gall in his mouth. Bread and salt will humble a rob ber. » If you hunt two horses you w'ill catch neither. “You may shut the door on the devil, but he will enter by the window. Praise not the ciop until it is stack ed. It is not necessary to plow* and sow fools; they grow of themselves. Truth is not drowned In water nor burned in fire. A fool may throw a stone into a pond; it may take seven sages to pull it out. No boues are broken by a mother’s fist. Whose bread and whose Silt I eat, his praise I sing. Lies march on rotten eggs. Who lies will steal. Saving Fences.—This is an item that should be carefully estimated, as it is one of the heaviest burdens of agricul ture. Fences are needed only to re strain stock; and if the stock is not pastured no fence is needed, except for yards, and perhaps a lane to lead the cattle to the wood lot for simple exer cise. Take the fact ot fenciug ninety acres into four fields, for pasturing thirty cows or cattle. These fields would be 22j>£ acres, and would require 720 rods ot fence. Now, if this fence cost only $1 per rod, and if we suppose it to last twenty years, then the decay will amount to five per cent, a year, and the labor of annual repair is gener ally estimated at five per cent. The in terest on the original cost at seven per cent, would be $50.40, and the ten per cent, for decay and repair $72, making $122.40 as the annual expense for fenc ing a pasture for thirty head of cattle. We shall see that this is more than the coat of labor for soiling the thirty head of stock, Mr. David Williams carefully prepared the fence statistics of Wal worth couuty, Wisconsin, and, after deducting for waste lands in ponds and lakes and one-half of the division fences, he makes the annual cost for the whoie county about $1 per. acre. Mr. Prince, of Maine, goes into an elaborate calcu lation of the cost of fenees in that State in 1760, and the result does not vary much from an annual cost of $1 per acre. The late Ezra Cornell took a great interest in studying this question, and gave his views in au address before the State Agricultural Society of New York in 1862, and he arrived at the con clusion that the average cost of fencing for every acre inclosed in that btateis $1 per annum. If then we take this as a fair estimate in the older States, every acre of tiie farm must be charged at this rate, or a farm of 300 acres, which usually keeps about 60 head of cattle, would pay a fenee tax of $300 in labor and material. The smaller the farm and the smaller the lots the greater the cost of fence per acre. Draining Land.—Draining plays a very important part in successful and profitable farming. No matter how much fertilizing matter you may put on a field, and how well you may at tend to the crops you may plant therein, if the place needs draining you will get but meagre and unprofitable crops; lor the land will remain wet, soggy and sour during the wet weather, and will bake hard and solid on the surface dur ing the hot summer months, both of which are opposed to rapid plant growth. The drain tile now so much n use is by far the best; for it lasts in finitely longer than wood, brush or stone drains commonly put in, though it may cost more to put such a drain down properly, the tiles, though not very expensive, making up quite a sum when a large piece is to be drained. It DOMESTIC. HUMOROUS. Five Ways to Remove Mildew from Linen.—(1) Wet the spot with lemon .. juice, then spread over it soft soap and us, officer? chalk mixed together, and spread where' the hottest rays of the sun will beat upon it for half an hour. If not en tirely removed, repeat the operation. Or wet with clear lemon juice and lay in the sun; or soak for an hour or two and then spread in the sun. Or mix softsoap, powdered starch and half as much salt together, and moisten freely with lemon juice; spread this on both si es of the spots and lay in the sun. As soon as it is dry repeat the operation, and continue till the spots disappear. If newly spotted, one wet ting will be sufficient. Or* wet the spots with chloride of lime dissolved in water, spread in the sun a few minutes aud then rinse. Repeat in case the mil dew is not all removed, but do not let this preparation remain more than a few minutes at a time before rinsing, even if the process ha3 to be repeated several times, as the chloride of lime will injure the cloth if allowed to re main on it too long. (2.) A solution of chloride of lime is the only thing I have ever found to have any "effect on that ugly and tenacious stain. A tea spoonful of dry chloride to a quart of soft water will give about the necessary strength. Soak the article in the solu tion from ten to twenty minutes, then dry in the sun. Repeat the process till the stain disappears. The timereauired will of course depend on the intensity of the stain. If very deep and of long standing, a little stronger solution may be required. (3). Get thedryest chlo ride of lime you can buy, and, for strong fabrics, dissolve four table- spoonfuls of it in one pint of water. Let the mildewed article lie in this so lution for fifteen minutes. Take it out, wring it gently, aud put immediately in weak muriatic acid, one part acid and four parts water. For delicate fabrics, the solution of lime should be much weaker; three or four times the quan tity of water should be put to the lime. Let the article lie in it only five min utes, and then put it into the muriatic acid. Instantly wash thoroughly in cold water. (4). Take five cents’worth of lime, dissolve it in a pail ol water, and put in the cloths; let them remain three or four hours, then wash, and the mildew will all disappear. (5). Rub well with soap, then scrape fine chalk and rub it also on the cloth; lay it on the grass; as it dries, wet a little. It will ’ome out after twice repeating the operation. Be Wise and Happy.—If yon will stop all your extravagant and wrong potions in doctoring yourself and fam ilies with expensive doctors or humbug cure-alls, that do harm al wavs, ami uso only nature’s simple remedies for all D _ your ailments—you will be wise, well pays, however, which is what the far- an .“ * ia PI>Y» and save great expense, mer really wishes to know. Some 1 I | ,e greatest remedy for this, the great, years ago the writer set out in the spring S/SfLi-JE? 0 ® you, is Hop a large plantation of choice pear trees. Owing to a dry season the trees made a handsome growth. The season follow ing being a wet one the trees did very poorly, and the year after this a few of them died. In the fall of the latter year, suspecting the cause, several thousand tiles were bought—three-inch ones— and the piece thoroughly drained. The spring after this was done the trees made an early and vigorous start, and iiave since not only borne heavy crops of fine fruit, but have also made good, healthy growths of wood and foliage. So much for the result of drainage. How* to Set a Hen.—Very few peo ple know how to set a hen properly, n the first place, remember that you can’t make her sit if she don’t want to. Cut a barrel in two in the middle, then cut out oue or two staves, so that when it is stood on its end there will be plen ty ol room for the hen to pass in and out, l’lace the barrel on the ground, with the headed end up, and then scoop out the earth to a concave shape and Bitters—rely on it. See another col umn. Veal Fritters.—Cutslices from cold roast veal so that they shall be about half an inch in thickness and a little larger than oysters, and of the same shape; season with salt and pepper. Make a batter of one pint of milk, half a pint of flour, yolks aud beaten whites of four eggs; have ready a dripping- pan with enough hot melted lard in it to nearly covefr the fritters; drop in two tablespoonfuls of the batter; over this place a rieue of meat, then two more spoonfuls of batter on top oi the meat. When brown, take up and send hot to table. The Town o’ Kangaroo, Sor.”— “Hello! What is this you have brought 3, officer?” Justice Morgan gazed in wonder on the queer-looking little old man that stood before him in the Police Court, twirling a little round hat in his fin gers. “He was lying on his back across the car track iu Thompson street at two o’clock.” “What is your name, ray man?’ “Ed. M.vDurmut, sor; an’if it’s all the same to you, sir, I’d like to know what I’ve been adoin’.” “Lying down in the street.” “Ain’t 1 got a right to lay down ef want to?” “You’ve got no right to interfere w’ith the passage of the street cars. “Well, we alius lie3 down wnen we gets tired, we does.” “Whom do you mean by we?” “Tftem as comes from the town come from.” “Where do you hail from ?” “The town o’ Kangaroo, sor, in South Australia, sor. When we feels sleepy, sor, we alius lies down there any wheres, sor.” “When did you come here?” “Only a bit ago, sor. It might be yes terday, sor.” “Why didn’t you go home when you got drunk?” “I couldn’t, sor.” “Why so?” “ ’Cause I ain’t got any, sor, an’ then when 1 got among the niggers down town, sor, I thought I was in Kan garoo.” “What makes your skin so yellow? “It changed color a bit, sor, since left here, sor, fourteen years ago, sor. an’ the place ’ere looks queer anvhow.’ : “What will you do when you ge out?” “Get off for Kangaroo, sor.” “Heave away then.” “Thank’ee sor,” said he, turning right about and sailing away for “them parts as people lies down in anywhere when they wants to.” Soft Molasses Cakes.—Take one pintof molasses, one-half cupful ot but ter, a teaspoontul ot salt, a teaspoonfu of ground cinnamon, the same of cloves, one nutmeg, two teaspoonfuls of baking soda dissolved in a teacupful of boiling water, or coffee, which is much nicer, and gives the cake a lovely put in a very little fine hay, and the flavor and richer color, flour enough nest is ready for the eggs. If it is not i to make a batter that will run from the convenient to put the barrel on tha spoon and not stiff enough to drop; goound, a grass sod placed underneath j bake half an hour, ihe nest will answer. It is best to place } the hen on a lew glass or worthless eggs,' t*, « u at first, as she vnay not take kindlv to: Lind Cake. I wo and a half the nest you have prepared for her. , ™P S 01,e cu P ( , butter - ™P Place her on the nest after dark aud she j f ^ will get accustomed to it through the | f bak * n * P°^ e f 5 b * night. If she seems inclined to sit af- r white); after ter this, she may be given the eggs , akl V out Jj 1 ? . tw0 . . ol w,nt ®> leat mg which are intended to be hatched. If, tb ? D ' * add t , wo “blespoon- the hen is allowed to leave her nest l ls 01 m0 , asae8, 0I ? e tea3 POonful of every day, a small coop may be placed ! Tui cinnamon one in front of the barrel, and then she will i “.“VE® 8 ’ add a he sure to return to her nest. She j J° l t be d rk ’ put to o eclier wltl ‘ t,im should always have near her a cup of ! Ir0Stin o water and plenty of food. If the above ! directions are followed and the eggs are Camphor Balls.—Clarify a pound of well fertilized, a good brood of chickens g°°d mutton suet and add 3 to it may be expected. ; three pounds of spermaceti, two of •»r ^_ . ! white wax and one of gum camphor How to Choose a good Cow.—A cut into very small pieces. Melt these crumple horn is a good indication, a , together with gentle heat, and stir un- full eye another. Her head should be til the camphor is dissolved ; then pour 8I ~.L a , j. 'Ttomiin nose, | it into moulds. It is very good for rough which indicates thin milk and little of ! hands. 6 it. See that she is dished in the face— ! sunk between the eyes. Notice that 1 -r» t-. she is what stock men call a handler— i t /5 EF . RE8HLNG J )RISK i>' Fever.—I ut a skin soft and lease, like the skin of a te a-sage, tw '°. sprig®of balm and a dog. deep from loin to the udder and a ! ! ,tU ® wood-sorrel into a stone jug, hav- very slim tail. A cow with these marks P . e ®I never lulls to be a good milker Small quantities of bones may be u- tifized by burning them a few at a time in the kitchen fire, This will greatly increase the value of the ashes, and the only expense will be that of time in collecting the bones. The Brahma fowls are inclined to obesity, and should not be fed wholly upon corn. A Brahma hen will grow fat while sitting when another hen would get poor. Wheat bran moistened with just enough milk to hold it togeth er is excellent food for a sitting Brahma. Use only the best bran. Tliat Dollar. thin a small lemon, clear from the white, slice it and put a bit ol the peel in, after which pour in about three pints of boiling water. Sweeten, and cover close. If you have been drinking too much, which however you should never do, a dose ot Dr. Bull’s Baltimore Pills will place you in good condition again. Tapioca Cream.—One coffee-cup of tapioca iu three pints of new milk; soak over night. In the morning set over a kettle of boiling water; let it come to a scald, stirring it often. Add four well beaten eggs and about half a pound of wiiite sugar; stir constantly until it thickens. Set it aside to cool; when A stranger who was the other day cold flavor with vanilla or lemon, having his boots blacked by one of the j a pd you will have a dish fit for a post office brigade, asked the lad what ^ in S* ^ he should do if some one should hand m , l,im a dollar. - BoTTLE Cement.-Fov a good cement Home. Let your home be provided with such necessries as piety, pickles, potatoes, pots and kettles, brushes, brooms, be nevolence, bread, charity, cheese,crack ers, faith, flour, affection, cider, sin cerity, onions, integrity, vinegar, spice and wisdom. Have all these always on hand, and happiness will be with you. Don’t drink anything intoxicat ing—eat moderately, go about your business, after you eat your breakfast —lounge a little after dinner—chat af ter tea—and kiss after quarreling; and all the joy, the peace, and the blessings the earth can afford shall be yours, till the grave closes over you, and your spirits are borne to a brighter and a happier world. resin, one of caustic soda and five of vas the water. This composition is then mixed : with half its weight of plaster of paris. spend the rest on the Fourth, reply. _ “That’s right—you are a good boy,” ! The compound sets in three-quarters of continued the man, “I like to give an bour » adheres strongly, and is not money to such a lad as you.” Pf™ eab ‘« ,ke ‘ b «. Pj ast f when used wu *1 . , * alone, and is attacked only slight!v by W hen the boots were finished he ^ warm water, handed the boy a nickle, and walked j * • off, never referring to the dollar which ! Any one desiring a recipe how to the boy had been almost ceitain of make soap for a cent a pound, will re- He had gone about half a block when j ceive it gratis, by addressing I. L. Cra- the boy overtook him and asked: gin & Co., Philadelphia, the manufac- lar ”^ JOU iDtend t0 &1Ve mG a d0l_ urers of the justly celebrated Dobbins’ “Oh, no. I simply wanted to see ^ ectr * c Soap. w hat you wonld do with it.” _ ~ “Weil, I’ve been thinking it all , Hermits —Iwo eggs, one and one- over,” said the boy, “and I’ll tell you cups of sugar, tw o-thirds of a cup what I’d do. I’d take it and hire some ; 01 bRtter or lar( L one cup of currants, one to pare my feet dowm sol could get on *; teaspoonful each of cloves, nutmeg number ’levens on without springing an ? cln J? a ™ on > ail 5j one teaspoonful of mv jints out of line,” : soda. Roil out like cookies; roll the The stranger looked from hfs feet to 1 currants in flour; sprinkle sugar on top the boy and back, then across the street belore baking, to a policeman, and as he turned to go | ~* * he muttered: Foam Pudding Sauce.—Four table- “Well, I’ve found out what he would ; spoonfuls of sugar, two tablespoonfuls do with it, but 1 don’t know as I feel of butter, one tablespoonful of flour any better for it.” j beaten to a cream: add the white of one egg, well beaten; beat the whole about When the Bowels are Disordered, j a n hour; then pour in a gill of boiling No time should be lost in resorting to a auita- water, stirring very fast. Ilavor to ble remedy. Hostetter’s Stomach Bitters is I taste. He Felt Flattered.—A young at torney who lately passed the car of De troit was braggingof the brilliant pros pects, before him, when an old denizen of Justice alley remarked; Yes, you will get along. Judge w'as speaking iu your praise the other day.” “He was, eh?” replied the youn«; limb.. “Well, I always thought 1 stoot in pretty solid with the old man. Words of praise from him mean something and are worth something. What did he say?” He said you had already made your mark in the world.” “Did he? Well, I’ll show my grati tude if I live long enough. Then he’s had his eye on me, eh? Please tell me how he said I’d made my mark.” “Let’s seel” mused the juryman as he scratched his head. “Well, now, I can’t recollect whether he said it w’as in the mud or Y on the ice, but the next time I see him 1 11 have a pencil handy!” During the session of a temperance meeting in a neighboring town, one of the persons who occupied the stage was an enthusiastic deacon who frequently interrupted the speaker by yelling “Thank Heaven for that!” One gen tleman was called npon who arose and said : “Ladies and gentlemen, I am heart and soul in the cause and feel that it will be of great benefit to the people of this place.” “Thank heaven for that!” yelled the deacon. “But, ladies aud gentlemen,” he continued, “1 am going to say that it will be im possible for me to address you this even ing”—“Thank heaven for that!” said the absent-minded man; and then the chairman took him out of doors and had two men sit on him. A little fellow rushed into the street recently to look at a monkey that accompanied an organ-grinder who was playing in front of an adjoining block. Never having perused the “Ori gin of Man.” he gazed in wonder aud admiration for a lew moments, and then rushing into the house he met his grandmother, to whom he addressed this question: “Grandmother, who made monkeys?” “Got], my boy,” replied the old ladv in her candid way. “Well,” said the excitable grandson in rejoinder, “I’ll bet God laughed when he got the first monke y done.” At the French Bazar in the Albert Hall, London, a lady was dispensing tea. A solemn gentleman approached and asked the price of a cup. “One shilliing,” replied the lady, and he put down a shilling. Before handing him the enp the lady raised it to her lips and observed that the price was now a sovereign. The solemn gentleman gravely replaced his shilling and said “Be good enough to give me a clean cup.” A Missouri man called on a Missouri editor to protest against something that had been in the paper. “Did you find Mr. Smith in?” inquired agentle- man as he came out in extreme haste. “Can you look at my face and ask me that?” said the man indignantly. “J beg your pardon,” replied the gentle man, “but I thought I was talking to the back of your head.” The intelligent reader will understand. A young man dressed in the height of fashion, and with a poetic turn of mind, was driving along a country road, and, upon gazing at a pond which skirted the highway, said: “Oh, how I would like to lave my heated head in those cooling waters.” An Irishman, overhearing the exclamation, imme diately replied : “Bedad, you might lave it there and it would not sink.” No Good Preacfiing.—No man can do a good job of work, preach a good sermon, try a law suit well, doctor a atient, or write a good article when e feels miserable and dull, with slug gish brain and' unsteady nerves, and none should make the attempt in such a condition when it can be so easily and cheaply removed by a little Hop Bitters. &ee other column. Jones, the supernumerary, has to enter from the right and say; “My lord, the carriage waits.” Certain changes having to be made, the stage manager informs Jones he w2J have ro enter from the left and say, “The car riage |awaits, my lord.” “My !” Jones exclaims, in piteous accents; “more study ! more study!” Large sales indicate the merits of all good articles. Druggists sell more of Dr. Bull’s Syrup than of all other rem edies for the cure of Baby Disorders. Can Files be Cored is the most important question to-day with suffering millions who, when Moking at the long list of useless pile nostrums feel as the afflicted Bible Patriarch, like exclaiming : “I hare heard many such things, miserable com forters are ye all, how long will ye vex my soul and break me in pieces with words?” It is not recorded that Job bad piles, bnt he could not have had anything more painful, and the same question might have been asked then as since for three thousand years : can piles be cured f We believe that Dr.Silsbee has solved the prob lem. for nothing is more certain than tliat his “Anakesitj,” does absolutely and promptly cure the worst cases of piles. When half a million of afflicted assert positively that it has cured them aud in 20 years no one has used the doc tor's wonderful remedy without instant relief, and by following his simple instructions as to habit and diet were, beueiitted and over 95 par cent cured, all arguments and theories of those who havn't used them,- go for naught. An a kerns is now prescribed by physicians of all schools and has been pronounced as near infallible as is possible. ' it is easily applied, perfectly safe, instantly relieves pain, and ul timately cures the most inveterate cases. It has grandly solved the problem that Piles can be cured. Samples of “Anakeoia" are sent free to all sufferers, on application to P. Neu- staedter & Co, sole manufacturers of Anake- sis, Box 3946 New York. Also sold by drug gists everywhere. Price per box. Oakland Female Institute, NORRISTOWN, PA, bebm5£ SEPTEM ' J. grier Ralston, Principal. LAHDRBTHS* SEEDS flu tte EprtlB Mr M INDORSING DR. RADWATS R. R. B3KXDIB HSUEUsa KMMKAILE CUBES JSS DHHHPUi SENTFREE! 2S£aPS.*£L^tJSa Iha.lauasBihpAca.mi Ate* If Your Liver is Disorder© Hoefland's Ger man Billers will set it aright Wrapping Food in Paper. It is a matter of daily experience on the part of everyone who purchases j such common necessities of life as but- 1 ter, bacon, cheese, sausages, etc., that these goods are almost invariably! wrapped up in printed or manuscript j paper. Perhaps we might also say that j provisions for picnics and other bam- j rpHE pers are stow*ed away in similar cover- j t ^ r , pi ings, and it will therefore, not be amiss if We Call attention tO the fact that dan- I The First Hundred Pag, gerhas been discovered to lurk in these I school course, in which . . are fonna m my tine li triuomz J uongn or glees for familiar wrappings. In the case of practlc ®* ud _ iTlRgfni . doubtingly at first, but alter experi encing their efficacy, with full conn deuce, it h no less a pleasure than a duty to thankfully ^knowledge the advantage we have derived from th> m. The pills are-resorted to as ofter , occasion requires, and always with the dc ». LAjnHUTH * SONS, n t g B. H1.TM 9L. effect. The R-ady Relle; cannot be bet PHTT^nkT.WWTA ter described th4n It ls by Its r am-*. We apph liniment frequently and freely, almoat lxk variably finding ihe promised •*Belief-” Truly yours, (signed) Dm. Rad wat. THURLOW WZXDl R. R. R. SWAY'S READY RELIEF CURB THS WORST PAINS In from One to SO Minn tea. rot one hocb after reading this advertisement need any oca SUFFER WITH PAIN. Bendy Relief Is m PAIN. It was the drat The Only Pain Remedy •hat instantly stops the most excruciating pains, al.ays Inflammations and cores Conges tions. whether of the Lungs, stomach. Bo el* hr other glands or organs, by one application. W PROM ONE TO TWENTY MINUTES, bo matter how violent or excruciating the pala. the RHEUMATIC, Bed-ridden, infirm. Crippled, Her.ous. Neuralgic, or prostrate*wUhdisease may suffer, BAIWAY’S BEADY BELIEF WILL AFFORD INST? NT EASE. INFLAMMATION OF THE B IDNEYS, INFLAMMATION OF THE BLADDER INFLAMMATION OF THE BOWELS, CONGKftf ION OF TH* LUNOR CORE THROAT, DIFFI■ UL1 BREATHING PALPITATION OF THE HEART, HYSTERICS, CROCP. DIPHTHERIA, INFLUENZA, A RARE CHANCE FOR AG THE COMPLETE HOME ! By Mrs. JULIA McNaIR WRIGHT. The theme is oue upon which the author brines to bear me frui's of years of research, observa ion and trav-L both in this country and the old world. illustrating Ancient The fu l , „ . in dModern Ht No work treating this subject 1 detail, ig*-d colored pit . ^ arviels of elegai -.— r .ng this subject iii ueimi, fore b-en offered, and hence Agents will n 1*1. Competent critics pronounce it Doli or *' full description J.C. McClJRDV * CO., have a th* greatbook or the year. Ushers, _ 20 S. Seventh St., Philadelphia, Pa. JUST PUBLISHED, TIE TOICE OF WORSHIP FOR CHOIRS, FOR CONVENTIONS, FOR SINGING SCHOOLS. Pnce SI.00. S9 00 per dozen. VOICE OF WORSHIP,by L.O. Emehso: " “ 'by the same hi I beautiful ud foi lection and urr;tngei The Fit her Cnurch Music by it for grac-ful and be. skid and judgment displayed in se- ten been transferred to the cheese or ! 4c - .i.rcs.n.-w» is, Sentences, Specimen copies mailed post-free for fil.00. leosible and useful. Plea«« by the observant cook or they are un noticed, and in due course become as- j similated in the process of satisfying; ^ ^ hunger. It is supposed that the ink or • •xa'uiue. Price giioT the paper itself may possibly by some \ . chance contain something deleterious, j Oliver DitSOfl 6t Co, Boston. But written paper is even more likely ; *. e. dittos a t o., to be hurtful, inasmuch as in writing KschMiaat!tL.rhiia the paper has been in close contact with the hand, w’hich not improbably may be giving off a perspiration that may enter the pores of the paper and may there ferment, not with advantage to health in the event of any portion of the manuscript being allowed to ac company the food down unsuspecting throats. This subject has called lorth some coriespondence in certain Ger man papers, and though we would not attach absurd importance to it, it may still be said that clean, unused paper is so cheap that provision dealers have small excuse for using either printed or written matter for wrapping up their commodities. Harvesting Wheat in Kansas. BLATCHLEY’S PUMPS The Old Reliable STANDARD PUMP For Wells 10 to 75 Feet Deep. New Price List, Jan. 1, 1879. ADDRESS C. G. BLATCHLEY, 440 MARKET Street, Pbllsda HOP BITTEBS. ^ Medicine, net m Drink.) ooetaihs MOPS, jfiUCHU, BLAlfDRAKE dandelion, ® Pvxest i5D Best Mksioax QvixraM or 1U> OTHX* BlTTEES. THEY OTiJnm AD Diseases of the Stomach, Bowels, Blood, Liver Kldneyn, and Urinary Organs, Nervousneaa, Kleep aapedaDy Female Complaint*. ^ 91400 IN GOLD. m for a ease they win not cure er hetp, 01 r anything Impure or lnjurione found la them, tekyoor druggist for Hop Bitten and try them Mfore yoa sleep. Take ne other. Ask Children ISa Ror Ta» for Stomach, Lirar and EMnoi superior to all otherm. Ask Drugglaca, ILL C. Is wm absolute and lirealstfhia eon foi Dmnkeneaa, use of opium, tobacco and narcotics Alahe'SHUty. TO ADVERTISERS. nr - We will furnlMls on application estimate* for Advertising in be bent and largest circulated Newspapersln tbe United States and Canadas. Oar lacllltles are an rpasmed. We make onr Customers’ Interests oar own, and *tady to please and make their Ad ertlslng profitable to them, as thou- ands who have tried ns can testify. Call or address, S. M. PETTINGILL A CO., 37 PARK ROW. New York, 701 CHESTNUT Street, Philadelphia. the moat reliable and widely esteemed medi cine of ita clasa. It removes the canaea of conatipaiion, or of undue relaxation of th- inteatin-a, which are uan&lly indigestion or a miadirection of the bile. When it acta as a cathartic, it does not gripe and violently evac uate, bnt produces gradual and natural effects, very unlike those of a drastic purgative; aud ita power of assisting digestion nullities those irritating conditions of the mucous mnmbrane of the stomach and intestinal canal which pro duce first diarihcea, and eventually dysentery. The mediciue is, moreover, an. agreeable one. and eminently pore aud wholesome. Appe tite and tranquil nightly slumber are both promoted oy it. Peach Cordial.—Make a rich syrup of one quart of peach juice and one pound ot white sugar; when cold add half a pint of the best brandy. For a drink, dilute with water at the time of using, Asiatic Cholera, Cholera Morbus, Summer Complaint, CoUc, Sour stomach. Diarrhoea, and all Affections of the Bowels, incident to either children or sduli s, are cured at once by Dr. Javne’s Carminative Balsam. It allays the Irri tation and calms the action of the stomach, and being pleasant to the taste. Is an acceptable remedy to the youngest of the family. In the kitchen—“Rosalie, this going out incessantly I cannot have; next Sunday you must stay at home all day.” “But, madam, 1 have promi ed my aunt to spend the afternoon with her.” Baby, interceding—“Do let her mamma; her aunt has been made a ser geant ard has got a new ccat v stripes on it, and a great long sword.” Roasted coffee is said to be a powerful disinfectant. The Forgetfulness of People. The Oxford Professor who, to avoid the wind when taking snuff, turned around, but forgot to turn back, and walked six miles into the country, was no more forgetful than those who still use the huge, drastic, cathartic pills, forgetting that Dr. Pierce’s Pleasant Purgative Pellets, which are sugar- coated, and little larger than mustard seeds, are a positive and reliable cathar tic, readily correcting all irregularities of the stomach, liver and bowels. Sold by druggists. When the grain is cut the Kansas Farmers show great differences in the handling of the crop. Some stack the wheat, allowing it to thoroughly sweat in the stack before threshing. Many others, equally well informed, allow the grain to stand in the stack until perfectly dry, and then thresh from the shock. Still others thresh from the heads if the weather be favorable. The millers prefer grain that has been sweated in the straw, claiming that the rheat has got to go through this pro cess either in the straw, in the bin or in the flour; and they prefer to have it sweat before they grind it. The word ‘sweat’ is used to denote a pecul iar process The straw on the stack becomes damj, and the wheat that was ‘off color” or bleached before stack ing, has its color restored. Shriveled wheat becomes plumper. In about four weeks after stacking, tbe wheat is through the “sweat,” and is ready for threshing. If it sweats in the bin, the grain feels damp, and in unfavorable weather heats. A job of threshing m the summer is dreaded by ail men; but the work has to be done. The- cheap est way to do it is with a separator, driven by ten or twelve horses. These machines will thres and clean from 400 to 800 bushels of wheat per day. The horses march around in a circle. The driver standing on top of the power with a long whip in his hand, keeps up constant yelling at the teams. The circle the horses march on becomes hard and 4 usty. The dust rises In vast clouds, and is swept by the strong winds, that blow constantly in Kansas, to the machine and stacks. The feed ers, two in number, alternate in feed ing the unthreshed straw into the sep arator. The man who is off w r ork, oils the machine and keeps It in running order. Tiie other, standing on a plat form in front of the cylinder, grasps a bundle, and with a deft movement shakes it up and starts it into the iron- toothed cylinder. A steady stream of unthreshed straw is kept going into the machine. At the other end of the sep arator a loose mas3 of chopped straw is climbing up the straw carrier, to be dropped on the straw stack. Men pitch the bundles to the machine. They are w arm. The air is dense with dust. The heat of the sun is terrific. Rap idly the men become black with dust. They speak only to demand water. They work silently, steadily, until the machine stops for some trifling repairs. Then they throw themselves dovvh to rest, but in an instant the voice of the driver is heard, “Get up! get up!” The horses strain, the cylinder turns, hums softly as it gets speed, then roars loud ly as it catches the full motion. Again the air is thick with dust; again the straw is being rapidly fed into the hungry ironclad mouth of the sepa rator. A man is seen to stagger, j Dropping his fork he clasps his head with his hands and falls—melted with ; ‘TOTTERE TO ADVERTISE, the heat. He is instantly grasped and | t»- See pettehuill carried to the shade; his head is cooled j off, his shirt opened, and the work is WHOM T0 ADVEBTISE through. resumed. As night comes on the men rv see pettenoill. are tired out. Their skins are on fire, so dreadfully have they been irritated GO T ° 3 ‘ pa kk Row,new York,and by the dust and chaff of the grain, j Se^PETTESJGlLiL Their eyes are bloodshot; they are hun- | — — ■- ———-=r-—=——jr-j gry. Soon after supper they all go to j C If fj |j | | jS sleep—some in the barn; others on the j floor of the house; still others, careless of any comfort, as they smoke out their pipes lie down on the ground andsleap there. will afford ease and comfort. Thirty to sixty drops In halt a tumbler ef •rater will in a few moments*cure Cramps, Spasms, f-our Stomach, Heartburn, Sick Hea4- tche. Diarrhea, Dysentery, CoUc, Wind la tht Bowels, and all Internal Pams. Travelers should always carry a bottle el Radway’8 Ready Relief with them. A few drops In Water wiU prevent sickness or pains from change of water. It Is better than Frenoft Brandy or Btttera as a stimulant. FEVER and AGUE. Fever and Ague cured for Fifty < ents. Ther* M not a remedial agent In the world that will cure Fever and Ague, and all other Malarious, Bilious, Scarlet, Typhoid. Yellow and other Fevers (aided by Radway's Fills) so quick as BAD WAY’S READY RELIEF. 50 CLS. s bottte Dr. Radway’s Rupertns’ ceUbmiod Slngls Breech-Ioadfn-t Shot Guu at 15 ap. Doabte-barrel Breach loaders al f 73 Muzzle and Breecb-loading Gun*, Biflea and Fistula of moit approved Engllah and American mak'a. All kind* of aportlna implement* and artf- sp—the b-ft guna yet made for the price. Price* application. * JOS. C. GRUBB & CO.. 712 Market St., Philada., Pa. ESTABLISHED 1S4S. MORGAN * HEADLY, Importers of Diamonds AND IMactiren of Spectacle 410 IAEI9I Itreot, Phllstfslphls. lUaitroted Price List seat to tke trad* ' mb application AGENTS^ READ THIS and expend SUSS When Trade is Dull Judicious Advertising Sharpens It. HOW T0 ADVERTISE. ts- »ec PETTESCII.I. WHEN TO ADVERTISE. »<■ mrmeiLi. —Horses were not shod until about fiTe hundred years after the Christian Era, with the bear market*, and on the best terms, along the Hi 3,000,000 ACRES RED RIVER VALLEY OFTHE NORTH. On long time, low prices and easy payment*. Pamphlet with full Information mailed free. Apply to D. A. McKINLAY, Land Com'r, SL F.X.4 X. B’y. »». Pawl. 311 nr.. Those answeraif an Advertisement will confer a favor npon the Advertiser and the Publisher by stating that theyaaw the adver tisement In this lournaLfnamlnc the paper). fHE CHEAT BLOOD PURIFIER FOR THE CURE OF CHRONIC DISEASE, SCROFULA OR SYPHILITIC. HEREDITARY OR CONTAGIOUS, he It seated In the Lungs or Stomach, Skin at Rones, Flesh or Nerves, corrupting the ■oilda and TltlaUng the Quids. j Chronic Rheumatism, Scrofula, Glandular Swelling. HacklfiR Dry Cough, Cancerous A;ieo- tlons fcyphliltkc Complaints. Breeding of the Lungs, D. spepsla, Water Bra^h. Tic Do oraux, White Swellings, Tumors, Ulcers, Skin and u p Liver Complaint, Ac. Kidney & Bladder Complaints, Urinary and Womb Diseases, Gravel, Diabetes, Dropsy, Stoppage of water, Incontinence of Urine, Bright’s Disease, Albuminuria and In all c*ses whe e therrare brick dost d postts.or the water Is i hick, cloudy, mixed with substances like the white of an egg, or threads like whits silk, or there Is a morbid, dark, blltou- appear^ ance and white bone-dust deposits, and when there Is a pricking, burning sens ition whea passing water, and pain in the am an of the and along the loins. ^ Bold by druggists, PRICE ONE DOLLAR. OVARIAN TUMOB OF TEN YEARS’ GROWTH CURED BY DR RADWAY’S REMEDIES. Dr. &ADWAY & 00., 32 Wirren Strut* NEW YORE. DR RADWAY’S Regulating Pills, Perfectly tasteless, elegantly coated with rweef gum, purge, regulate, purify, cleanse and st re ffthen. Radway’s Pills for the cure of all disorders of the Stomnch, Liter, Bowels, Kid neys, Bladder, Nervous Diseases. E adachs, Constipation, Costive ness. Indigestion, Dyspep sia, Biliousness, Fever, Inflammation of the Bowels, Piles, and ali derangements of the In ternal viscera. Warranted to effect a positive curew Purely Vegetable, containing no mer cury, mineral or deleterious drugs. ^ Observe the following symptoms, result ing from disorders of the Digestive Organs: Constipation, Inward Plies, Fullness of the Blood in the Head, Ac dlty of the Stomach, Nausea, Hear bum. Dlsg rst of Food, Fullness or Weight in the Stomach, hour Fractions, sink ings or Flutterngs in the of the stomach, Swimming of the He id. Hurried and Dlfficuu Breathing, Fluttering at tne Heart. Choking or SufTUatlDg Sensations when In a lying pour are. Dote or webs before the Bight, Fever and Dull Pain in Head. DeEclency of Perspiration. Yel- Read “False and True,”^ fend a letter stamp to RADWAY 4 CC>.. Ne r Blending REWARDS I»kHING’S PILK k7»fEDV~ fails“u core. Al aorhn th» turn r*. gives imm- :n-- Beanes 01 long xt-ndiug ir. | w -k •-a tart*offers, t AUTION—None eenu Pa. ;r Tx.v e free. bortle. riJtor,. wild Al f Dr. J. P. Miller s J.d by al! dri TEAS. •Choicest in the world—Importer^' pricee—Largest Company in Am* rica — arapTe article—^pleae-a everybody— rade continually mcreaai q—Agents wanted «'«i y- rh*r-—b-*t iuduc -menta—don't waato timt—seudtor ircular. W etT.s, Al Vesey gt., N.Y. P. O. Box 1287. s. M. PETTENGILL A CO., Advertising and the best mediums and the manner of d lng if,—ESTIMATES for one or m re laser ions of an &dver;l-ement, iu any number of papers, forwarded on application. TREEMOUNT SEMINARY. Norristown, Pa., Begins September 9th; 'atronized by p*-opl.> deaf' inc their eons thoroughly prepared for College or buainras For Circular*, ddr bb JOHN W. LOCH, Ph. D„ Principa.. GENTS’ FINE SHOES] B ;ESl) POSTAL FOR PRICE List and iastrocti'Qia for >elf- Mea«Brement, to BARTLETT, NINTH Street, Philadelphia, Pa. GOOD ADVERTISING CHEAP. of R y. CM ri p A with thcorder. will insert In v-LtJ vAhn, village newspaper an advertise ment occupying one inch spa e. one time; o six lnes twoilmte; or three lines four times. £90 Pactt In advance, will insert in 350 V— u cash, village newspapers an adver- villige newspapers tl-ement of one Inch spai-e, one time; orslx lines two times; or three lines four times Address S. O. PETTENGILL k CO., 37 Park Row, New York. Or; 701 Chestnut Sit. Phila-