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BUDGET OF FUN.
.humorous sketches from
VARIOUS SOURCES.
\ Born Fisherman—The Gallant Man
—'Worse Than Lies—Correct—He
Knew She Wouldn’t—Very
Simple, Etc., Etc.
He ran and he jumped and he rode a swift
wheel;
He broke all the records worth trying;
He bought him a polo and a nickle plate
reel,
Then he broke the best record for lying.
—Troy Press.
THE GALLANT MAN'.
She—“She was pretty but poor, you
say?”
He—“Yes; and he took her at her
face value. ”—Truth.
HE KNEW SHE WOULDVT.
Fish Man—“Do you think your
wife would like a tine roe shad?”
Customer—“No. A person can’t
talk and eat shad at the same time. ”—
Life.
CORRECT.
Frank—“What reason have you for
asserting that love isn’t blind?”
May—“Well, I’ve noticed that his
blandest smiles are all for the prettiest
girls.’’—Truth.
THE RETORT SOOTHING.
“Go away!” said the sick man to
the doctor. “I’d rather trust myself
to a horse doctor than to you.”
“Weli, I ndmit you are more in his
line than in mine,” said the doctor.—
Truth.
WHAT HE ASKED FOR.
Hojack—“Have you anything in the
shape of a dollar you could lend me?”
Tomdick—“Yes; here.”
“But that’s only a cent.”
“Yes; but the shape is all right.”—
Truth.
WORSE THAN LIES.
“Ho you have it in for Smith?
What has ho been doing? Telling
lies about you?”
“No; the dinged thing is he’s been
telling the truth about me. ”—New
York Press.
this
VERY SIMPLE.
Syms—“I don’t understand
question of labor and capital.”
Garner— ‘ ‘It’s very simple. Labor
wants capital at the least possible ex
ertion and capital wants labor at the
verv smallest outlay.”—New York
Herald.
PUTTING IT GENTLY.
“No, Marquis, I would be unable to
make you happy.”
“Vy weel you always perseest to
underestimate yourself?”
“Well, you see, I’ve been brought
up to forget that I am a millionaire’s
daughter. ”—Life.
DISCOUNT.
Hayrick (after the ceremony)—
“How much are you going to tax us
for this splice?”
Parson—“The law allows me two
dollars.”
Hayrick—“Suppose we say one
fifty, and you needn’t kiss the bride?”
—Truth.
her home with her aunt was often dis
turbed by evidence* of the old lady’s
indifference to everything but the wel
fare of her own material possessions.
Ore day in going down cellar for some
butter, she tripped and fell heavily
quite a distance. The maiden aunt
rnshed to the door, and peering down
into the darkness, called ont sharply:
“D’ye break the dish?”
“No 1” thundred back the niece, for
once thoroughly aroused. “No! but
I will!” and she shivered it with hearty
good will against the cellar wall.—
Lewiston Journal.
SOMETHING IN A NAME.
An Englishman, traveling on the
Continent, engaged the services of a
smart conrier, and on arriving at an
inn one evening he sent him for the
travelers’ register that he might enter
his name in accordance with the Aus
trian police regulations. The man re
plied that he had anticipated his
wishes, and registered him as an “Eng
lish gentleman of independent means.”
“But how did you write my name?”
“I can’t exactly pronounce it, but I
copied it faithfully from Milor’s port
manteau. ”
“But it is not there. Bring me the
book. ”
What was our traveler’s amazement
at finding, instead of a very plain
English name of two syllables, the fol
lowing portentous entry: ‘ ‘Monsieur
Warrantedsolidleather.” — Le Petit
Liegeois.
AN ANGEL IN DISGUISE.
Caller—^ “Only one moment of your
valuable time, sir, that is all. I am
an agent of the Great American Spread-
Eagle Company for the insurance of—”
Business Man—“See here ! You are
about the fortieth insurance man, of
one sort and another, who has called
this morning, and I’m about sick—”
“Jus’ so, jus’ so; that’s what I
thought. That’s why I came. It’s the
opportunity of your life, sir. This in
surance—”
“I tell yon I’m tired and sick of in
surance. ”
‘ ‘That’s it. No telling what moment
it may strike in. That’s why I called,
sir. ”
“Eh?”
“Yes. I am the agent of the Great
American Spread-Eagle Company to
Insure Persons Against Being Talked
To Death.”—New York Weeklv.
johnny’s diagnosis.
Little Johnny—“Sammy Slowgo is
sick, and the doctors say he can t
live.”
Mother—“Mercy me! What’s the
matter with him?”
Little Johnny—‘T don’t know, ’eept
he has always been a very good boy.”
—Good News.
TRYING TO PLEASE.
"" Visiting Brother—“Wliat’s this fishy
smell?”
Struggling Artist—“Fish oil and
salt. I’m mixing my colors with it. ”
“Phew! What for?”
“I’m painting a marine for the ex
hibition, and though these hanging
committees don’t seem to have eyeR,
they must certainly have noses.”—New
York Weekly.
A LOGICAL CHARGE.
He—“I see the man who saturated
his wife’s mother with kerosene, then
set her afire and called in the neigh
bors to look on, has been convicted of
murder.”
She—“The plea of insanity didn’t
work then.”
He—“No. The judge charged the
jury that nobody but a man of sound
mind would do such a thing.”—Life.
HOME-MADE PLAYTHINGS.
A SAILOR IN COURT.
A sailor was a witness, and the cross-
examining lawyer asked:
“Do you know the plaintiff or de
fendant?”
Witness—-“Naw; what’s that?”
Lawyer—“You don’t know the mean
ing of plaintiff and defendant?”
“Naw.’*
“And yet you would give testimony
against the plaintiff? The witness is
incompetent from ignorance, your
Honor.”
“A ’vast heavin’, shipmate. Stand
athwart sliijis and let me ask yon a
question.”
"Go ahead.”
‘ ‘What is abaft of the binnacle ?”
“What has that to do with the case?
I don’t know.”
‘ ‘A pretty lawyer ye be. Any bloody
landlubber ought to know that the
compass is abaft the binnacle. ”—Texas
Siftings.
Couldn’t Frighten That Picket.
I was so fortunate as to be appointed
corporal that winter, says a writer in
Blue and Gray, and the first time I
went on picket in that capacity an in
cident occurred which, if it was not
the origin of a since familiar term, was
the first instance of its use within my
recollection, though the emphasis at
the time was somewhat different than
it was after the phrase became a slang
expression. It happened that I was
detailed with the first relief, and as we
rode to the line the corporal of the old
picket accompanied us to show me the
line and the various posts, to explain
the surroundings and transmit to me
the orders, and to call in his own men.
As we rode along he related a joke that
was played upon one of his men while
there. Not far from the upper post,
and in rear of it, was an old grave. As
the victim of the joke went on duty
the first time, the man whom he re
lieved told him that at midnight the
night before the ghost of a man was
seen near that grave, riding around on
horseback, without any head. This so
frightened the man that he did not
dare to go on duty on the midnight re
lief, but instead hired a braver com
rade to stand his picket for him.
When I posted my relief, between
eleven and twelve o’clock that night
this story came into my mind, and I
thought to have a bit of sport with the
man whom I was to leave there all
alone at that midnight hour, so I told
“AViHie ” said the young mother to j him the stor with al i the , lwe i couM
r abject slave, “you must go to work ; __ t into w alll1 _
her aujeeu slave, you must go to worn | t into my tone and manner . But
and rinse a beard right away. j picket didn’t frighten so easily,
husband* ' 6 bewlldered | He was just lighting his pipe, and re-
“To amuse baby. His grandpa was
here this afternoon, and it would have
done your heart good to see how the
>little darling did enjoy pulling the old
man’s whiskers. He pulled some of
them clear out.”—Indianapolis Jour
nal.
THE LAST STRAW.
“Orville,” asked Mrs. Ardup, “are
times so tight?”
‘-‘Awful, Bacliel! Awful!” replied
Mr. Ardup. “There’s absolutely no
money to be had. ”
“Then we’ll economize,” rejoined
his little wife, cheerily. “You were
nbout to go to the barber’s. You
needn’t go. I’ll cut your hair mv-
self. ”
And he went ont and made an as
signment. —Chicago Tribune.
plied between whiffs: “Well (puff),
if there’s a man (puff) comes around
here (pnff) to-night (puff) without any
head on (puff, puff), I’ll put a head on
him.” He wasn’t disturbed during hie
midnight vigil.
To Harness a Water Power.
A one-fourth interest in the watei
power of Cedar Kiver Falls, Washing
ton, appropriated by W. W. Howard,
has been sold to H. F. Whitney, and
he says he proposes to use it for manu
facturing and ultimately for transmit
ting electric power to the city.
The power appropriated is that oi
2000 cubic feet per second in the twe
falls and the river’s course between
them. The upper fall is about three
miles below Cedar Lake, and each fall
is about 100 feet high, while the fall
in the quarter of a mile of the river's
course between them make up another
100 feet, so that there will be an aggre
gate of 300 feet. This, it is claimed,
will give a larger power than Sno-
qualmie Falls.
It is proposed first to use the power
to operate a shingle and sawmill at
each fall, as the appropriators of the
fnlls have located 1600 acres of timber
in the vicinity, and there is nbout 15,-
000 acres tributary. When Mr.
Whitney and his associates can find a
market for 10,000 horse power in
Seattle, Tacoma and the adjoining
country, they contemplate putting in
dynamos and transmitting the electric
power. The distance from the foot ol
’ the lower falls to Seattle is thirtv-five
<<T . „ - , , . . , , , ,, ... miles m a beeline, and there is a popu-
,b "; tos, “ !*” dl « rfs - i lation o( nearly 150,000intha territory
££?«!£» !<“"? SI* «*•»* p««r could be dil
; tributed.
The country around the falls
SHE WOULD HASTEN.
Old Lady—“And so you expect to
get married when you grow up ?”
Little Girl—“Of tourse. Everybody
gets married. I won’t say ‘no,’ like
Aunt Lucy did, and be an old maid—
no, indeedy.”
“Perhaps you won’t like those who
ask you?”
“Oh, yes I will, I guess. I feel real
sure that when a real nice little boy—
I mean man—comes to ask me to get
married, I’ll be so happy I won’t wait
to run down stairs to meet him, I’ll
just slide down the bannisters.”—
Good News.
THROUGHOUT THE SODTH.
Notes of Her Progress and Prosperity
Briefly Epitomized
And Important Happenings from Day
to Day Tersely Told*
The Texas lines, on Thurday, decided
to allow stop over privileges on all
tickets sold by southwestern lines dur
ing the harvest excursions.
A very fine bed of solid white and
gray marble, covering several acres,
has just been discovered on the land of
Mr. George W. Pirkle, within two
miles of Flowery Branch, Ga.
At Charleston, S. C., Wednesday,
Isaac Mitchell and his entire family,
consisting of five persons, were pois
oned. Mitchell and his daughter, Ada,
are dead, and the others are danger
ously ill. The physicians who made
the examination agreed that the peo
ple were poisoned by arsenic.
Thursday evening the first and sec
ond regiments of infantry and one
troop of cavalry, of South Carolina,
went into camp at Camp Bogart near
Morehead City. About six hundred
troops are in camp. The other two
regiments will not encamp this year,
owing to lack of funds.
At the Southern Educational con
vention at Louisville, Kv., Thursday,
officers were elected as follows: W. H.
Bartholomew, of Louisville, president;
Erank Goodman, Nashville, secretary;
J. N. Carlisle, of Texas, re-elected
treasurer. Galveston, Texas, will prob
ably be the next place of meeting.
A Raleigh, N. C., special says: A
letter to a prominent state official
states that Dr. Lewis, health officer of
Northampton county, reports the prev
alence in its eastern section, of a dis
ease resembling Asiatic cholera. Per
sons attacked die in six or seven hours
and there have been twelve to fifteen
deaths. An official examination is be
ing made.
The department of flgrieultuie of
North Carolina issued its July crop
report Tuesday, based on statements
made by 1,200 correspondents. The
percentages of the condition of crops
are given as follows: Cotton, 78 ; rice,
87; peanuts, 90; corn, 95; tobacco,
87; clover and hay, 94. Tobacco of
this year’s growth is beginning to be
marketed.
The dispensary in Greenville, S. C.,
was closed Thursday on an order of
Judge Norton restraining them from
selling any further until he can give
the case a full hearing. The injunc
tion was secured on the grounds that
the dispenser is an ex-barkeeper and
has been so within two years, which
disqualifies him for the office of dis
penser, and that his petition was not
signed by a majority of the freehold
ers of the city.
A Charleston dispatch says: * This
city is still waiting with expectant awe
the punishment promised it by Gov
ernor Tillman for refusing to take the
state cocktail from a state dispensary.
The dispensary law has been in opera
tion now nearly two weeks, and while
a few barrooms have been closed,
most of the 200 are still open. Some
of them display signs with lists of soft
drinks, but the tiger lurks in the rear
and shows himself wherever the pass
word is given.
The weather crop bulletin for South
Carolina, issued Tuesday, says: A gen
eral cry comes from all sections for
rain, and unless showers occur shortly
great injury will result. Cotton is re
ported late from one to two weeks,
and while a slight improvement is no
ticed, it is not sufficiently widespread
to warrant much consideration. Corn
lias been laid by in good condition in
the majority of. counties. Gardens
are failing fnst. Potatoes are about
TE1EGRAPHIC GLEANINGS.
Tie News of tne World Condensed Into
Pithy and Pointed Paragraphs.
Interesting and Instructive to AH
Classes of Readers.
The steamship City of Alexandria
arrived at New York from Havana
Wednesday night with $500,000 in
gold consigned to the Western Nation
al bank of New York.
The Bank of Commerce at Spring-
field, Mo m failed Wednesday. The
last statement showed $256,000 in re
sources, a surplus of about $10,000
and$176,000 in deposits.
Charles M. Barnes, stationer and
bookseller, at Chicago, assigned Wed
nesday; assets, $171,000; liabilities,
$163,000. Confession judgement en
tered in the superior court caused the
suspension.
The grand jury, after investigating
the failures of L. A. Lappen & Co.
and the Plankinton bank, at Milwau
kee, Wis., has reported indictments
for all the officers and directors of the
Plankinton bank.
Fire Tuesday night completly de
stroyed the Lake Superior Mineral
Paint Company’s factory and the lime
kilns owned by the warehouse and
Builders’ Supply Company at West
Superior, Wis. The loss is $100,000.
The Chamberlain Investment Com
pany, at Denver, Col., the largest real
estate concern in the west, closed its
doors Monday morning. The liabil
ities direct and contingent, are $2,-
326,129, assets are $3,000,000.
An application will be made at New
York to have Samuel Spencer made
co-receiver of the Richmond and Dan
ville and East Tennessee companies.
The receivers in control of these com
panies will retain their positions.
The Lodi bleacher and dye works of
Lodi, N. J.,were entirely destroyed by
fire Sunday afternoon. The plant was
valued at $100,000; covered by insur
ance. About a hundred men and wo
men were thrown out of employment.
A Chicago dispatch says: Oscar
Nebe, the anarchist who was recently
released from the penitentiary, was
quietly married at three o’clock Wed
nesday afternoon to Miss Eliza Hepp.
The bride is the owner of a nourishing
saloon.
Miss Elizabeth J. SoutliRll Clarke,
of Newport News, has been elected
to represent the state of Vir
ginia in the tableaux of the state in
connection with the reunion of con
federate veterans at Birmingham, Ala.,
in September.
Richard Morgan Olcott, doing busi
ness as Olcott & Co., exporters of
grain and general merchandise at New
York, made an assignment Thursday.
His liabilities are not definitely known,
but are reported to be from $100,000
to $150,000.
Sunday evening an excursion of six
cars full of people, returning to Cin
cinnati from Melborne on an excursion
ran onto a sidetrack into a lot of
empty cars. Robert Lang, of Coving
ton, Ky., was killed, and a large num
ber of people were wounded.
The Cramps, shipbuilders at Phila
delphia, have decided to launch the
cruiser Minneapolis August 12th, next.
Miss Washburn, daughter of Senator
Washburn, of Minnesota, has been
named by Secretary Herbert to officiate
as godmother at the christening.
The Southern Steamship Association
held its annual meeting at Coney Is
land Tuesday. The contracts for last
year came up for consideration, but
on account of the present uneasy Btate
of the money market no changes will
be made in the present agreement.
Monday a magazine containing two
pany, of New York city. The com
pany was incorporated in May, 1892,
with a capital stock of $100,000, suc
ceeding to the business of the Henry
G. Allen company. It had branches
in Chicago and Pittsburg. The an
nual report in Jannarv claimed the
liabilities did not exceed $35,000, and
the assets were $100,000.
A Philadelphia dispatch gays: The
British schooner, Mystery, manned by
a captain and a crew of four men, ex
hausted and worn out by overwork,
put in the Delaware breakwater Tues
day with her colors at half-mast. The
other four members of her crew had
succumbed to the ravages of yellow
fever, which broke out on board when
the vessel was almost one thousand
miles distant from land or medical at
tendance.
General Hickenlooper, correspond
ing secretary, has issued the official
call for a meeting of the society of
the Army of the Tennessee at Chicago
on the 12th and 13th of September.
The local executive committee at Chi
cago charged with the preparations of
the meeting will make ample provis
ions f3r the reception and entertain
ment of the members, which will in
clude arrangements for attending the
world’s fair.
WASHINGTON GOSSIP.
from Day to Day in
National Capital,
Appointments in the Various Depart
ments—Other Notes of Interest.
the only thing which have derived any tons of dynamite, belonging to the
great benefit from the weather of the \ Home Powder Company, located sev-
past week.
A rumor was current in Colnmbia
Tuesday that the general assembly of
South Carolina will be called together
this year on November 1st, one month
earlier, and giving the lawmakers two
months instead of one. The surface j
reason for this is the completion of the j
codification of the laws, but it is also
presumed that the governor intends to !
have the legislature on hand ready to j
act on the decision of the supreme
court which meets November 1st as to j
the constitutionality of the dispensary |
law, and also to arrange to pay J
the big deficit which it is thought will
be made by the dispensary.
MR. CLEVELAND IMPROVING.
The Troublesome Case of Rheumatism
is Slowly Disappearing.
A special of Saturday from Buzzard’s
Bay, Mass., says: Mr. Cleveland is
slowly recovering from the rheuma
tism which has been used as the basis
for alarming rumors concerning hia
health. Dr. Bryant, who is still in
attendance at Gray Gables, and Col
onel Lamont, who acts as Mr. Cleve
land’s mouthpiece, both say that there
is nothing the matter with Mr. Cleve
land except rheumatism, and that it is
yielding to the rest and quiet which
the president is now enjoying.
to the landlord of the P— House in
Portland. There were five of us there
who all wanted pie, and he only had thlcklv settle a, and township twentv-
one pie m the house, let he gave each j three, which wiU be opeued Fridav ,
a impossible interrupted Robinson. 18 co ^te\y settled. One claim lias
“None of your miracles here.”
“It is true, though,” said Creighton.
“Yes, but tell me how he did it,”
chimed in the logical man in the
corner.
Creighton grinned. “He sent out
for another pie. ’’—Boston Budget.
six timber claimants and a home
steader, and some hot contests may be
expected. There is considerable min
ing excitement on the lake and valu
able discoveries of gold and silver de
posits are reported.—Seattle (Wash
ington) Post-Intelligencer.
AND SHE pro.
.A girl in a Maine village who wade | only fo or through the same tanker.
In 1836 English drafts crossed with
a banker’s name wpre made payable
Against Silver Coinage
The Morocco Manufacturers’ Na
tional Association, one of the strongest
trade organization in the country, and
representing in its body over $50,000,-
000, held its annual meeting at Atlan
tic City, N. J., Thursday, and in ad
dition to routine business adopted a
resolution favoring the presentation of
a petition to congress asking that body
to take such action as will cause the
immediate suspension of the further
purchase and coinage of silver.
A Break for Liberty.
Fully seventy-five convicts at the
house of correction of Iona, Mich.,
made a break for liberty at 9 :30 o’clock
Monday morning, but were thwarted
by the guards after a desperate fight
in which guns, hammers, hot irons and
stones were promiscuously used. One
convict was killed outright and others
will die. One or two guards were fa
tally injured.
Signed the Scale.
A Pittsburg, Pa., dispatch say6:
Jones A Laughlin signed the Amalga
mated Steel scale Tuesday afternoon,
workmen conceding the reduction of
from 8 to 15 per cent. The firm want
ed a cut of from 10 to 20 per cent,
j The iron scale was signed last week,
! and the company’s extensive plant,
| employing 5,000 men, will resume in
I a few days.
—
A Fatal Wreck.
The West Shore day express No. 1,
due at Newberg.N. Y.,nt 12 :04 o’clock
I p. m., was wrecked in the West Shore
freight yards Thursday. Mrs. Eliza
Klemm and three other unknown wo
men and a two-year-old child were
killed, Many other passenger* were
eeriously wounded,
eral miles from Denver, Col., exploded
with terrible force. The shock was
felt over the city. At the magazine a
hole was torn in the earth over forty
feet deep.
A dispatch of Thursday from Alex
andria, Egypt, states that the report
from that city to the effect that there
were eighty-five cholera patients in
the hospital there and that forty deaths
had occured from the disease, was
erroneous. No cholera is reported
anywhere in Egypt.
A New York dispatch of Tuesday
says t The sheriff has received an at
tachment for $101,850 against the
Central Railway and Banking com
pany of Georgia in favor of Charles
McKay and served copies of it on the
Mercantile Central Trust company,
the Hanover bank and other parties.
The Milburn Wagon Company,
whose works at Toledo, Ohio, are the
second largest in the world, on Monday
served notice on its 800 employes
of a 25 per cent reduction in
wages. A large number of men at
once laid down their tools and walked
out, and not over a score of men have
returned to work.
A dispatch of Tuesday from Caddo,
I. T., says; Governor Jones has re
turned home, after attending the spe
cial session of council in regard to the
shooting of the nine Choctaws, who
have been reprieved by the national
government. He snys they will be
shot or he will call out every member
of his miliiia to accomplish that end.
The Bank of Garnett, one of the
leading institutions of Anderson
county, Kan., closed its doors
Wednesday morning, catching some
depositors rather heavily and the
county treasurer for $13,000 of the
county’s money. It is thought the
hank will be able to pay out, but con
siderable excitement now prevails.
The state bank at Shnbert, a small
town south of Falls City, Nebraska,
failed Monday. A day or two ago the
bank examiner investigated the books
and G. V. Argaboright, the cashier,
left the country, leaving a statement-
that he was $21,000 short, and said
that he preferred to leave his family
to going to the penitentiary. Argo-
boright is also treasurer of the Ameri
can Bond Company.
A special of Tuesday from Mans
field, O., says: Physicians are dealing
with a wholesale case of poisoning.
In all twenty-five families are sick;
ten persons at the point of death, the
result of eating cheese made by a local
cheese company, and sold by grocery-
men. The victims suffer intensely.
Physicians differ as to the cause, two
claiming it is the result of contamina
ted well water.
J. S. Conover & Co., New York,
manufacturers and dealers in open
fireplaces, grates and fenders, wood
mantels and tiles, assigned Tuesday
without preferences. The firm was
always rated high. Bradstreet’s lately
estimated them at from $250,000 to
$300,000. One of the firm said this
afternoon that- the firm had liabilities
of $400,000. He thought the assets
would show $525,000.
Two executions have been issued
against tb« BritUnia Publishing oom-
Comptroller Eckles, on Wednesday,
appointed E. K. Fogg receiver of the
Nebraska National bank, at Beatrice,
Neb.
The gold reserve increased $599,898
Wednesday, the total amount being
$97,886,575. The currency balance
remains at about the same figure—
$27,353,881.
The total number of fourth-class
postmasters appointed Tuesday was
ninety-nine, of which thirty-three
were to fill vacancies caused by resig
nations and death.
The chief of the bureau of statis
tics reports that the total value of the
exports of beef and hog prodnets
from the United States during June,
1893, was $10,098,836.
The department of state received
news of the death of United States
Consul Joseph E. Stone, at Nogales,
Mexico, Tuesday morning. Mr. Stone
was appointed vice consul iu 1872, and
was promoted to be consul last Feb
ruary.
Secretary Herbert on Wednesday
accepted the resignation of Commo
dore Wilson as chief constructor of
the navy and appointed Constructor
Phillip Hichborn to succeed him.
Commodore Wilson resigned on ac
count of ill health.
The value of the exports of cotton
from the United States during the
month of June, 1892, was $6,856,165.
The total value of the exports of do
mestic breadstuff’s from the United
States during the month of June was
$19,512,751.
The comptroller of the currency is
sued his usual call for a report on the
condition of banks at the close of bus
iness Wednesday, July 12th. This,
the comptroller says, is one of the reg
ular five annual calls and not due to
existing conditions.
The president has directed Acting
Secretary Sims to inform Mr. Kobert
P. Porter that his resignation as
superintendent of the census, tendered
June 30th, is accepted, to take effect
July 31st, and, iu the meantime, he is
granted a leave of absence from July
1st. -
The allottments to the Pawnee In
dians in the Indian Territory were
formally approved by Acting Secretary
Sims, Tuesday. The schedules em
brace twenty-eight allotments cover
ing 112,710 acres to be thrown open to
settlement at the same time and
the same manner as the Cherokee
strip.
Secretary Carlisle has decided that
foreign exhibitors at the World’s fair
will be allowed to sell their exhibits for
delivery after the exposition. This
decision upsets the calculations of the
managers of the fair who have been
counting on a big revenue in the shape
of percentages from the sale of the
exhibits.
Theire are each day added indica
tions that the repeal of the Sherman
law will be accompanied with consid
erable difficulty. With the contested
elections in the senate, however, it
will be a long time before the repeal
question can be reached in that body.
While it is almost like guessing at the
attendance of the world’s fair, the
present indications are that congress
will run its extra session into Decem
ber.
Those financiers who were among
the first to discern and predict the
prevailing financial distress are now
the first to declare that the crisis has
passed; that whatever congress may
or may not do with the Sherman bill,
the worst has been experienced. In
other words they are looking up from
the valleys of depression to the hill
tops of prosperity, and believe that
from this time forward the situation
will slowly, but surely improve.
A statement issued from the treas
ury department shows that the net
gold in the treasury at the end of June
last was $95,485,413, which was more
than the total at the end of either of
the two months preceding. In the
ten days from June 30th to July 10th,
the gold holdings increased from $95,-
484,413 to $97,286,677, and the tables
show a slight but steady increase from
June loth last, when the net gold
stood at $90,722,958, the lowest point
reached in many years.
The abolition of seed distribution
through members of congress and the
charging of the cost of meat inspection
upon the packers are likely to be two
of the leading recommendations in the
annual report of Secretary Morton, of
the department of agriculture. The
secretary has inquired through the
state department how the meat inspec
tion is regarded in European countries,
whether it is necessary to secure the
entrance of our products and whether
it promotes their consumption.
The new Peruvian minister, Mr.
Canevaro, called upon Secretary
Gresham Thursday. He has heard
nothing of the disquiet in Pern as yet,
although slight disturbances may be
expected in the south as the result of
the tour of the presidential candidates
who were opposed to the present ad
ministration. On the 28th of this
month the Peruvian congress will con
vene, but the elections which will have an
important bearing on the future of the
country will not be held before next
January.
Postmaster General Bissell has de
cided to abandon the three sizes of
postal cards now in use and to substi
tute one size for both single and reply
cm4s. that j»wpo»« |a view,
specifications which have been sent to
prospective bidders for the contract of
furnishing the postal service with cards
during the next four years call for
cards of the uniform size of thre* and
one-half by five and one-half inches.
This is known as international size, it
being used generally by the countries
composing the international postal
union.
To AboDtth Experiment Stations.
Secretary Morton intends to tear to
shreds Jerry Rusk’s agricultural patch
quilt, which he spread with such care
over the west during the last four
years. Secretary Morton is busy mak
iag out his report. On being asked
by a correspondent as to what recom
mendation he would make about the
agricultural experiment stations he
said: “I shall recommend the aboli
tion of every one under my department.
Those managed by individual states to
which the government gives annually
$15,000 each are sufficient to experi
ment in. All others are simply useless
aud a waste of money. For instance
at Gardner City, Kas., over $30,000
has already been expended on a futile
attempt to get a grass to grow without
water or dirt. This is $30,000 thrown
away, and almost as much has been
wasted at Schuyler, Neb. Yes, in my
report, I shall certainly recommend
their abolition.”
Will Be Sharply Contested.
The appeal which has been taken by
the interstate commerce commission
from the recent decision of the United
States district court for the northern
district of Georgia will be sharply
contested, as it involves the integrity
of the long and short haul clause of
the interstate commerce act. The
Georgia case involved first-class rates
from Cincinnati to Atlanta, Augusta
and Social Circle in Georgia. The
shippers contended that the rate to
Social Circle should not be higher
than that to Augusta, but the court
held that there was a through rate to
Augusta and that the rate to Social
Circle was properly fixed by the rail
roads by adding the local rate from
Atlanta to the through rate from Cin
cinnati to Atlanta. The decision of
the court leaves all the railroads full
power to make such discriminations if
they declare in one case that they have
a joint rate and in the other that they
have no joint rate. The interstate
commerce commission proposes to fight
teis decision if necessary in the circuit
court of appeals, the supreme court
and the two houses of congress.
LIKE LUCRETIA BORGIA.
A Woman Who Made a Business of
Poisoning Her Husbands.
A New York dispatch of Thursday
says: Police Inspector McLaughlin
has returned from Detroit, Mich.,
after the arrest there of Dr. Henry T.
W. Meyer and his wife, who are want
ed in New York, as well as in other
large cities in the United States, for
poisoning people that they might get
the insurance money on their victims’
lives. The case shows that Meyer and
his wife are two of the blackest heart
ed criminals the police ever handled.
There are at least a dozen charges of
the same nature against them in the
other cities. The grand jury has found
indictments against the pair, and ex
tradition papers are being prepared.
The facts in connection with the
case here, and the reports from other
cities show that Lucretia Borgia has a
formidable rival iu the person of Mrs.
Meyer. On March 30,1892, J. Baum,
of No. 326 East 113th street, died, af
ter a severe attack of intestinal trouble.
Dr. Minden, of Twelfth street, who
attended him, gave a certificate to his
grief-stricken wife, naming the cause
of death chronic dysentery. He was
buried in Brooklyn cemetery. Baum’s
life was insured in the Mutual Life
Insurance Company for $2,000 in favor
of his wife, and, after the usual form
ula, the amount was paid.
Dr. Gillette, of the insurance com
pany, for some reason, suspected there
was something wrong, and communi
cated his fears to Coroner Schultz.
Baum’s body was quietly re-exhumed
and Deputy Coroner Walsh, assisted
by Professor Doremus, made an au
topsy. The stomach was found to con
tain antimony in large quantities, which
drug had produced the intestinal trou
bles. Coroner Schultz then laid the
facts before Inspector McLanghlin,
and detectives were placed on the
case. After a long search, the detec
tives found that Mrs. Baum was, in
reality, the wife of Dr. Henry Meyer,
who was also known under the alias of
Henry Beuter and Hugo Mailer. The
woman, the detectives said, made a
business of getting married, persuad
ing her husband to insure his life, and
then accomplish his death by poison.
IN THE INTEREST OF SILVER.
A Monster Mass Meeting Held at Salt
Lake City, Utah.
A monster mass meeting was held at
Salt Lake, Utah, Wednesday night in
the interest of silver. Besolutions
were adopted referring to the wide
spread distress in the west and appeal
ing to congress to renounce the Sher
man act by the absolute free coinage
of silver at some just ratio to gold,
and favoring the appointment of
a delegation representing citzens of
all classes, irrespective of poli
tics, to attend the next session of con
gress and labor in the interest of sil
ver. Governor West presided over the
meeting. No revolutionary or in-
flamatory speeches were made, and
the language of tho Colorado silver
men was characterized as unwise and
hurtful to the true interests of the
west.
SUNDAY CLOSING ASSURED.
SUFFERED EVERY MINUTE
Since I came ont of the
war, with eat&ri h in my
head, ehronic diarrhoea
and rheumatism,” lays
Mr. J. G. Anderson, ef
Scott dale, Pa. “I had
pains all over me, my
sight was dim, and there
seemed to be floating
ttperk* before my eyes.
The food I ate seemed G. A sdersen.
like lead in my stomach. The rheumatism was
in mr right hip and shoulders. Hood’s Sarsa
parilla and Hood’s Pills did me more good
than anything else. All my disagreeable
symptoms have gone.” HOOD’S CURES.
flood’s Pills cure Constipation by restoring the
peristaltic action of the alimentary canaL
A Good Norse.
A good nnrse is a woman thoroughly
healthy and alert in all her five senses.
She must have good sight, in order
that she may watch the slightest changes
in the patient, catch a motion of the
eye, the tips of the fingers, and see in a
moment what is wanted. She must
have quick hearing, to catch the slightest
whisper of a weak invalid. She must have
a sensitive as well as soft touch, that
she may note the most delicate changes
in the skin and may test the temper
ature of hot applications that may be
ordered. It is especially necessary
that she have a correct and acute
sense of smell, so she may detect the
6lighest impurity in the atmosphere
of the sick room. Her taste must be
correct, in order that she may test the
food to see that it is properly cooked.
A good nurse should be also a good
cook, and at the best training school
for nurses a course of lectures with
manual training in cookery is a part
of the teaching.
Where the Hurry Stops.
Lady—“Where did you get this
pretty doll?”
Little Girl—“I forget the name of
place, but it’s that great big store
Blue-Eyed People.
Have you ever heard that nearly all
the great people in the world have had
blue eyes? There have been, to be
sure, a great many celebrated persons
who have had brown or black. Bnt
the majority have been bine-eyed. All
the presidents, except President Har
rison, have had eyes as blue as the
skies. And besides them, there have
been Milton, Lord Bacon, Benjamin
Franklin, Napoleog, Bismarck and
Mr. Gladstone, besides hundreds of
others.
Removing a Sonrcc of Peril.
Danger is near when the kidneys grow in
active. The source of peril is removable with
Hostetter’s Stomach Bitter 1 , which unques
tionably averts Bri'jht’s disuse, diabetes,
gravel and other ruinous maladies attribut
able, in tho first instance, to a dormant con-
ditionof the kidneys and bladder. A health
ful impulse to the performance of the func
tions of these organs is sp ediiy communi
cated by the Bitters, which likewise removes
constipation, malaria, liver trouble and dys
pepsia.
South Carolina has 10,773 acres planted in
wat‘ rmelons, and it is expected that the crop
will be a large and profitable one.
If your Back Aches, or you are all worn out,
good for nothing, it is general debility.
Brown's Iron B.tters will cure you, make yon
strong, cleanse your liver, and give you a good
appetite—tones the nerves.
The St. Louis water tower is the highest in
the world.
The Ladies.
The pleasant effect and perfect safety with
which ladies may use the California liquid lax
ative, Syrup of Figs, under all conditions
makes it their favorite remedy. To get the
true and genuine article, look for the name of
the California Fig Syrup Co., printed near the
bottom of the package.
A Louisiana man. eighty-one years old.
wagers $26 that he can beat any flfty-year-oln
man In the state in a foot race.
Ladies n-eding a tonic, or children who
want building up, should take Brown’s Iron
Bitters. It is pleasant to take, cures Malar! i,
Indigestion, Biliousness and Liver Complaints,
makes the Blood rich and pure.
_ The use of tortnre in legal pro~eedings was
where everybody is in a hurry except Permissible in Austria until well within the
the ones that makes change. "—Street pre c ry ~
& Smith’s Good News. j We Cnre Rapture.
! No matter of how long standing. Write
for free treatise, testimonials, etc., to S. J.
Hollensworth & Co., Owego, Tioga Co., N. Y.
Price $1; by mail, $1.15.
E. A. Rood, Toledo, Ohio, says : “ Hall’s Ov
tarrh Cnre cured my wife of catarrh fifteen
years ago and she has had no return of it. It’e
» sure cure.” Sold by Druggists. Tic.
Costs Money to Live.
Little Girl—“I haven’t had a new
dress for ever so long.”
Mother—“No, dear; mamma couldn’t
afford it: but be patient until my last
dress is worn out, and then I’ll make
you two nice dresses out of the sleeves. ”
Beecham’s Pills cure indigestion and consti-
ration. Beecham’s—no others. 25 cents a box.
You want the Best
Royal Baking Powder never disappoints;
never makes sour, soggy or husky food;
never spoils good materials; never leaves
lumps of alkali in the biscuit or cake; while
all these things do happen with the best of
cooks who cling to the old-fashioned
methods, or who use other baking powders.
If you want the best food, Royal
Baking Powder is indispensable.
99
“German
Syrup
Regis Leblanc is a French Cana
dian store keeper at Notre Dame de
Stanbridge, Quebec, Can., who was
cured of a severe attack of Congest
ion of the Lungs by Bosehee’s Ger
man Syrup. He has sold many a
bottle of German Syrup on his per
sonal recommendation. If you drop
him a line he’ll give you the full
facts of the case direct, as he did us,
and that Boschee’s German Syrup
brought him through nicely. It
always will. It is a good medicine
and thorough in its work. 6
ans
The World’s Fair Directors to Take a
Vote on the Question.
A Chicago special of Thursday says :
There is little doubt now expressed
among the exposition directors but
that the Snnday closing of the World’s
fair will shortly become an assured
fact. There was a discussion on the
question when the executive committee
met, but the question was too sweep
ing for them to handle, and the matter
was referred to a general meeting of
the directors. The comparatively
small attendance on the last four Sun
days has perplexed the directors, and
it is now highly probable that the
World’s fair will not hereafter be
opened on the Lord’s day.
Justice Blatchford’8 Funeral.
The funeral rites were performed
over the remains of the late associate
justice, Samnel Blatchfor.l, of the
United States supreme court at New
port, B. L, at 2:30 o’clock Tuesday
afternoon. The quiet little chapel of
All Saints was crowded. The remains
were enclosed in a black broadcloth
casket, with woite silver trimmings.
The floral tributes were numerous and
costly. After the services the remains
were taken to New York for interment.
Positively cnre Bilious Attacks, Con
stipation, Sick-Headache f etc.
25 cents per bottle, at Drug Stores
Write for sample dose, free.
J. F, SMITH & CO.^-New York.
I am seventy-seven years old,
id have had my age renewed
and have had my age
at least twenty years by the use
of Swift’s Specific My foot
and leg to my knee was a
77 __ .
running: sore for two years, and physicians said
it could not be cured. After taking fifteen sn V“i
hinttioe s i< not a sore on my limbs, anal
YEARS OLD
bottles S. S ■ S. there is not ay ore on my limbs, and__
have a new lease on
life- You ought to
let all sufferers know
of your wonderful remedy.
■imummnMimUiiJ
Delicious Drink.
EASILY MADE
sunriER
COLD.
WINTER
HOT.
JUICES
Quiets theXwTM. Aids UigMliin.
Cools th« Blood. Prevents rmn.
Quenches Thint. Temperance Drink.
Put up In condenied form, 10, 25 and 50 tent
bottles. Aikyouroaociaor vaVGOlST. To be
■ure you getthe genuine Bhow your dealer thi«
advertijement; or tend $1.00 to nt and n -will
lend by expreas, prepaid, enough to make .evert!
gallona. At wholesale only by
FRANK E. HOUSH & CO.
235 Washington St., Boston, Maas.
AGENTS wanted in each town.
iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii ptttt rnn r i
Ira F. Stilie,
Palmer, Kansas City.
IS A WONDERFUL
REMEDY—especially for
old people. It builds up
the general health. Treat
ise on the blood mailed free.
SWIFT SPCIFIC COMPANY,
Atlanta, Ga.
s
0L1SH
/
ir practical joke upon John Wash-
burp, a lad in West Union, Ohio, has
hadl a deplorable result. Some men
pretended that they were about to ar*
rnt the boy, end he has become in-
mt
-j
Do Not Be Deceived
with Pastes, Enamels and Paints which stain the
hands. Injure the Iron and hunj. red.
The Rising Sun Stove Polish is Brilliant, Odor-
or glass package with every pu
> tin
IAN
■ For Indigestion, Billoagne«»»
= Headache, Co n at I patio n. Had
| Complexion, Offensive Breath,
I and all disorders of the Stomach,
= liver and Bowels,
I RIPANSTABULES
I act gently yet promptly. Perfe .
| digestion follows their use. Bold 1
I by druggists or sent by mail. Box
= (t vials),v5c. Package (4 boxes), $L - s
I For free samples-address §
§ BIPA>» CHEMICAL CO., New York. =
jmiLMn: —..niM!.;;;—ii::iMiini—:i:n—III ■M: i niMn:. MimiMlllllM
DROPSY
Treated free.
PeelUtely CC&SD
with T«f«tabls
SrstdiM. Have
cured many thou
sand cases pro-
MEND YOUR OWN HARNESS
f WITH
THOMSON’S!
SLOTTED
CLINCH RIVETS.
No toots required. Only a hammer needed to drive
and c Inch them easily and quickly, leaving the clinch
abso.ntely smooth. Requiring no ho e to be made in
the leather nor ourr tor the Riveia. They are strong,
foagb and durable. Millions now In use. All
lengths, uniform or assorted, put up In boxes.
Ask roar denier for them, or send 40c. In
stamps for a box of 100, assorted sizes. Man'fd by
JUDSON L. THOMSON MFQ. CO.,
WAI.TIIAJI, BLASS.
Troy,
_ I Alabama.
Altitude 600 ft.; climate mild and beautiful; choice
of College Courses leading to degrees of Bachelor.
Master and Doctor of Science, Pedagogy and Philos
ophy and to Life Certificates or Professional Llf© 4
Diploma from State Superintentent. Scholarly and
experienced teachers may take l*ROFE£S5lO>«
Ala COURSE largely IN ABSENTIA. Ex
penses low. For information address E. R. EL-
BRIDGE* LL.Dm President, Troy, Ala.
HOMES FOR THE POOR
AND RICH ALIKE
jf testimonials *1 miraculous cures sent rNCB.
LyBHHIKaaSKSES.'Si
MfltirV Made Easily and Rapidly.
Ill U ll I. I We want within Thirty day9,100 men who
ban energy aod grit. Will give them a posi'ijn in
which they can make money rapidly. Labor ight. Em-
p'nymsat the year around. Requires no capital or great
CANCER Cured Permanently
SO KNIFE. NO POISON, NO PLASTER.
JNO. B. HARRIS. Fort P yae, Aim.
80ITRE CURED- ENDfor
I J. Kle'.Q.HelleYiUt.N, J,
mg a co!c
eEder,
Atlanta, Ga.
Consumptives and people
who have weak lungs or Asth
ma, should use Plflo’a Cure for
Consumption. It has eared
tkonsnnds. ft tots not Injur
ed one. It is not bad to take.
16 best coagh syrup.
Sold everywhere. £5c.
L N, U.
.Tweafcpeifbi,