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CARTERSVILLE AMERICAN.
VOLUME 11.
Tie Cartersiille American.
OFFICIAL ORGAN OF BARTOW CO.
PUBLISHED EVERY TUESDAY MORNING
T
American Publishing Cos,
CAKTKRSVILLK, ©A,
OFFICE!
Up-Stairs, North-East Corner of West Main
and Erwin Streets.
All communicatians or letters on business
should be addressed to
AMERICAN PUBLISHING CO.
Carteraxllle, Ga.
TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION:
One Year, Cash in Advance. ....$1.60
Six Months, “ “ 7&
Three ** “ “ 50
Jlf not paid in 4 months, $2.00 per year.
Papers sent outside ol the County, 15 cents
additional for postage.
RATES OF ADVERTISING:
For each Square of 1 inch or less, for the first
insertion, $1.00; each subsequent insertion, 50
cents. Special contracts made tor larger space
or longer time. All contract advertisements
must be paid quarterly.
Local Notices, 120 cents per line lor the first
insertion, and 10 cents for each subsequent in
sertion.
Special Notices ten cents per line.
Tributes of Respect and obituaries over six
linos, 10 cents per line.
AJi personal cards in Local Columns 25 cents
per line.
DIRECTORY.
COURT CALENDAR—CHEROKKK CIR
CUIT.
J. C. Fain, Judge. J. W. Harris, Jr., Solicitor
General.
Bartow County—Second Monday in January
ar.d July.
Catoosa County—Second Monday in February
and August
Murray County—Third Monday iu February
and August.
Gordon County—Fourth Monday in February
and August.
l ade County—Third Monday in March and
{Riptem her.
Whitfield County—First Monday in April
and October.
BARTOW COUNTY COURT.
G. S. Tuinlin, Judge. J. J. Conner, Sol. Gen.
Geo. A. Howard. Clerk. J. G. Broughton,
Bailiff.
Quarterly Terms—First Monday in March,
June, September and December.
Monthly Term—First Monday in each month.
JUSTICES COURTS.
Times for holding Justices Courts iu the dif
ferent Militia Districts ol Bartow county, Ga,:
CartersviUe— No. 822d Second Tue duys,
Adairsville " 856th.... Fourth Fridays,
CassvtHe “ 828th....second Fridays,
Kingston “ 952d..... First Fridays,
Euharlee “ 851st Sec’nd Situidays,
Ailatoona “ 810th.-... Third Saturdays,
IVolfPen “ 1041st....fourth Saturdays,
iStacup Creek “ 963d Third Saturdays,
Bixth Disti ict *• 036th Fourth Saturdays
Mine Log 821th....First Saturdays.
COUNTY OFFICERS.
J. A. Howard, Ordinary.
F. M. Durham, Clerk Superior Court.
11. W. Cobb, Treasurer.
John A. Gladdou, sheriff. A. M. Franklin,
Deputy Sheriff.
Bailey A. Barton, Tax Collector.
W. W. Ginn, Tax Receiver.
A. M. Willingham, Coroner.
t*. W . lv. Peacock, Surveyor.
iCoHJHjUsioners—S. C. Prichard, T. C. Moore,
A. Vincent, John H. Wike, T. S. Hawkins.
CITY OFFICERS.
A. P. Wofford, Mayor.
James D. Wilkcvson, Marshal.
Geo. S. Cobb, Clerk.
B. R. Mountcastle, Treasurer.
Aldermen—First Ward, J. C. Wofford, A. R.
Hudgins; Second Ward, G. Harwell, W. H.
Barron; Third Ward, John Stover, Elihu
Hall; Fourth Ward, W r . C. Edwards, Aaron
Collin*.
STANDING COMMITTKKB.
Street—Collins, Hudgins, Barron.
Finance—Stover, Edwards, Wofford.
Cemetery—Hudgins, Collins, Edwards.
Public Hall—Hall, Wofford, Barron.
Relief— Edwards, Barron, Harwell.
CHURCH DIRECTORY.
MetuodlsST.—Pastor, Rev. J. B. Robins. Ser
vices, every Sunday at 11. a. m., and 7:3b, p. in.
Prayer meeting, every Wednesday at 7:30, p.
m. Sabbath School, every Sunday at 9:30, a.
m.; Juo. W. Akin, Sunt. Youi-g men’s prayer
meeting, every Thursday at 7:30, p. m.
Baptist.—Pastor, Rev. F. M. Daniel. Ser
vices, every Sunday at 10:45, a. m. and 7:15, p.
m. Prayer meeting, every Wednesday at 7:15,
p. m. Sabbath School, every Sunday at 9:3®,
a. in.; D. W. K. Peacocs, Supt. Young men’s
prayer meeting, every Sund yat2,p. m. Ser
vice of song, every Sunday at 3, p. in. Month
fly conference, third Sunday ot each mouth at
3, p. m.
PRESBYTEKtAN.—Pastor, Rev. T. E. Smith.
Services, every first and third Sundays at It, p.
in. Sabbath School, every Sunday at 9, a. m.;
T. W. Milner, Supt. Prayer meeting, every
Wednesday at 7:30, p. m.
Episcopal.—Church of the Ascension. Min
ister in charge, Rov. W. K. McConnell. Ser
vices. every Sunday, except third in each
month, at 11, a. in. Sabbath School, every Sun
day at 10. a. in.
Professional Cards.
T. W. MII.NER. J. W. HARRIS, JR.
HILNKK A HARRIS
Attorneys-At-Law.
Office over Howard's Bank.
Cartersville, Ga.
JOHN H. WIKLK. DOUGLAS WIKLK.
WIHI.E A WIKLE,
Attorneys-at-Law & Real Estate Agents
Offices at Court House and on Main Street
above Erwin, Cartersvillc, Ga.
georoe . johssoa,
Attorney-at-liaw,
Office, West Side Public
JOr Will practice In all the Court*.
A. M. ROUTE. WALTIH M. KYAH.
FOUTE A RYALS,
Attorueys-At-Lftw.
WILL PRACTICE IN ALL THE COO RTS
of thi* state. Prompt and faithful At
tention given to all business entrusted to us.
Office, corner Main and Erwin Streets, up
stairs. Cartersville, GA.
J. M. NEHL. J. J. CONNER. W. J. NBAL.
COMER A HEEL,
Jk ttorney *-At-liw.
WILL PRACTICE IN ALL THE COURTS
of this ,'tate. Litigated cases mad* A
specialty. Prompt attention given to all bus
iness entrusted to us, . ai.i* . n a
Office on Erwin Street, between Main An A
Market. Cartersvillt. GA-_
J. T. SHEPHERD,
Pliysiciau and suf|#*
Office on Main Street, above Erwin,
Cartersville* GA.
Railroads.
KENNESAW ROUTE!
WESTERN R. R.
The following time card in effect Sunday,
Dec. 30,1883:
NORTH BOUND
NO. 8-WESTERN EX PRESS—DaiIy.
Leave Atlanta 7 30 a. m.
Arrive Marietta 8 20
Cartersville.... 9 25
“ Kingston 952
“ Dalton ll 23
“ Chattanooga 100 p. m.
NO. I—FAST EXPRESS—DaiIy.
Leave Atlanta 2 35 p. ml
Arrive Marietta 3 27
•* Cartersville.. 4 29
“ Dalton ..622
“ Chattanooga... 800
NO. 11—LIMITED EXPRESS-Daity.
Leavo Atlanta 11 40 p. m.
Arrive Marietta 12 39 „. m.
“ Cartersville 1 48
*• Dalton 3 44
“ Chattanooga 515
Rome Express—North—Daily, except Sunday.
Leave Atlanta 4 05 p. m.
Arrive Marietta 3 UO
“ Cartersville 6 03
“ Home 7 20
No, 1 carries Pullman cars from Atlanta to
Louisville, Jacksonville to Cincinnati, New
Orleans to Washington.
No. 11 carries Pullman cars from Savannah
to Chicago and Atlanta to Nashville-
SOUTH BOUND. .
NO. 4-FAST EXPRESS.
Leave Chattanooga 8 00 a. m.
Arrive Dalton 9 33
*• Kingston 11 16
“ Cartersville 1142
“ Marietta 12 46 p.m.
Arrive Atlanta 1 45
NO. 2—SOUTHERN EXPRESS.
Leave Chattanooga 2 55 p. m.
Arrive Dalfon 4 30
“ Kingston 602
Cartersville 6 31
“ Marietta 7 47
Arrive Atlanta 8 40
NO. 12-LIMITED EXPRESS-Uaily.
Leave Chattanooga .... 10 15 p. m.
Arrive Dalton 11 49
Cartersville 1 47 a. m.
“ Marietta 2 50
“ Atlanta 340
Rbme Express—South—Daily, Except Sunday.
Leave Rome... 8 30 a. m.
Arrive Cartersville 9 45
“ Marietta 10^9
H Atlanta 11 45
No. 4 carrivs Pullman cars from Cincinnati
to Atlanta, Washington, New Orleans, Louis
ville to Atlanta.
No. 12 carries Pullman cars from Chicago to
Savannah and Louisville to Atlanta.
B, W. WRENN, Gen’l. Pass. Agt. 1
R. A. ANDERSON, Superintendent.
EAST & WEST R. R. OF ALA.
ON and after Sandav, Nov. 14, 1883, trains
on this road will run as follows;
GOING WEST—Daily, Except Sunday.
no. 1. no. 3.
Leave Cartersville 950 a. m. 430 p. m.
“ Stilesboro 10 02 4 42
“ Taylorsville 10 37 5 17
“ Rock mart... 11 10 5 50
Arrive Cedartown..., 12 00 6 40
GOING EAST —Daily, Except Sunday.
no. 2. MO. 4.
Leave Cedartown 205 p. m. 115 a. m.
“ Rock mart 3 00 8 07
“ Taylorsville 3 35 8 39
“ Sti esboro ... 3 53 8 55
Arrive Cartersville 4 25 9 25
SUNDAY ACCOMMODATION—Going Eest.
Leave Cedartown 0 OQ a. pi.
“ Stilesboro 8 62
“ Taj lor.-vllle 9 21
M llockmart...; 9 40
Arrive Cartersville ..10 10
SUNDAY ACCOMMODATION—Going West.
Leave Cartersville . .. 2 50 p.m.
“ Stilesboro 8 lal
“ Taylorsville 3 37
“ Rockmart 4 1J
Arrive Cedartown 5 00
ALABAMA DIVISION.
Daily, Except Sqnday.
Leave East A West Junction. . 2 56 p. in.
Arrive Broken Arrow 6 (;0
Leave Broken Arrow 9 00 a. in.
Arrive East A West Junction 1 15 p. in.
ROME RAILROAD.
The following is the present passenger
schedule:
no. 1. no. 3.
Leavo Rome •10a. m. 415 p. m.
Arrive Kingston 8 55 5 30
no. 2. no. 4.
Leave Kingston 920 a. m. 655 p. m.
Arrive Rome 10 25 a. m. 650
xo. 5.
Leave Rome 8 00 a. m.
Arrive Kingston 9 00
NO. 6.
Leave Kingston 9 20 a. m.
Arrive Rome 10 10
Nos. 1,2, 3 and 4 will run daily except Sun
days.
Nos. 5 and 6 will run Sundays only.
No 1 will not stop at the junction. Makes
close connection at Kingston far Atlanta and
Chattanooga.
No. 2 makes connection at Rome with E. T.
Ya. Jt Ga. It R., for points south.
Ei;EN HILLYEIt, President.
J. A. SMITH, Gen’l. Pass. Agent.
IF YOU ARE
GOING
West!
NORTHWEST
SOUTHWEST.
BESURE
Your Tickets Read via the
~ C. & St. L. By.
The McKenzießoute
Tba First-claas And Emigrant Passenger*
FAVORITE!
Albert B. Wrenn, W. I. Rogers.
Pa*. Agent, Pas. Agent,
Atlanta, Oa. Chattanoog s Tcnn.
W. A. lIANLFf,
Gen. Pa* A Tkt. Agent,
Nashville, Tcnn,
R. E. CASO M,
4m
DENTIST,
cabtibsville. ga.
• OSCA, Of Ar curry’o Dnt* Stora.
CAKTERSVILLE, GEORGIA, TUESDAY, APRIL 15, 1884.
The Cartersville American.
Entered at the Post Office ai Cartersville ,
Qa ., May 9 th, 1882, as second class matter.
TUESDAY, APRIL 15, 1884.
BIOGRAPHICAL SKETCHES.
/ No. 3.
JOHN CRAWFORD.
BORN 1788—DIED 1573.
On the 12th of April, 17&8, in Green
ville district, South Carolina,John Craw
ford was born; he died at his home near
Cassville, in Bartow county,Georgia, 12th
of August, 1873.
In early youth he made up his mind
to raise his father’s family to circumstan
ces of greater comfort. His father was a
poor man with ja larger family. This boy,
with a firm will and a persevering energy,
clung to his early determination for elev
en years. He was successful. Here
was the combination of generous aims
and honesty of purpose that eventually
carried him into the ministry. Diligence
and liberality, under the divine favor,
made him a man of means; and his ex
ample strikingly illustrates the truth,that
“ho who sow T s with blessings shall also
reap with blessings.”
In 1814, when tw’enty-six years old, he
volunteered for service in the Creek war,
and bore aims through a campaign of
six months. On his return from camp
he settled on a farm in Laurens district,
South Carolina, and shortly after, mar
ried Miss Martha Clore, who walked
the way of life by his side until death ;
called him away, leaving her, with six ,
little children, “to follow after.”
He began liis Christian career by J
joining the Boeky Mount Baptist church j
Laurens district, South Carolina, in 1819.
For more than a half a century he
lived the life of a consistent Christian. In
the glow’ of his early experience lie felt
that those who are receivers should be
givers also, and heard and obeyed the
Voice which says,“ye are my witnesses.”
He at once began to preach the gospel,
and was soon ordained to the ministry.
Mr. Craw’ford came to Georgia in
January, 1836, and settled in Bartow
county, within a mile of Cassville. He
joined the church in that town, which
was then named Beulali, He spent the
first year in evangelistic labor in Chero
kee Georgia, without fee or reward from
man, but not without tokens of blessings
from on high. The next tw r o years he
held the pastorate of Beulah chu.ch on
those annual calls, w’hich certainly have
no precedent in the letter of Scripture,
and which, to say the least of it, seem
contrary to the Bible spirit. But iu 1839
the church called him without limit of
time, and he served for twenty-one con
secutive years. It w 7 as during this term
of service that the Baptist denomination
in the state was rent in twain by the
anti-mission schism; and though, wiien
that unhappy agitation began, there
were members of the church warmly in
favor of “the non-fellowship resolutions,”
and of division, his influence availed to
preserve harmony and peace.
The labors of Mr. Crawford were not
confined to Beulah church. He minis
tered to other churches, far and near,
and did much preaching at intermediate
points, in private houses or in groves—
wherever, in fact, be could gather a con
gregation of his fellow-mortals about
him. Such service, not unnecessary
now was more needful then; for that was
the period of the early settlement of
Cherokee Georgia, and, amid the usual
and unavoidable roughness of frontier
life, there was great destitution of
churches, and a sore famine of the word
of God. These things stirred his spirit
within him, and the desert blossomed as
the rose under his hand. He had a
pointed, concise style and deeply earnest
spirit, when bringing the truth of God
and the soul of man together. Not a
district in all this section of country but
has to-day many witnesses to the faithful
ness and effectiveness with which he toiled
as a herald of the cross. Not a church
scarcely, unless of more recent origin,
but will remember his ardent zeal and
unflinching courage in her service; full
surely not Cassville, nor Petit’s creek,
(now Cartersville,) nor Borne, nor New
Bethel, nor Enon, nor Raccoon creek,
nor many others.
Mr. Crawford was one of the prime
movers in the organization of the Middle
Cherokee Association and of the Chero
kee Baptist Convention. He was the
largest contributor to the Cherokee Bap
tist college, located at Cassville; and was
president of the board of trustees of that
institution from its foundation to the
burning of its buildings by United States
troops in 1864.
“Old, father Crawford,” as he was
familiarly called by those who knew liim
well and who loved him, passed a little
over forty-seven long and useful years of
his life in his native state, and a little
over thirty-eight years in his adopted
state, and he left behind him in both
that memory which “smells sweet and
blossoms in the dust."'
When old ago came upon him, he grew
of necessity, less active in the ministry,
but he abated nothing of his in
terest in the cause for which he had so
long wrought and wept. At last, when
no longer able to preach himself, it was
his wont to call his neighbors together in
bis own bouse, and have some one else
to preach to them there. In his last
illness, the preaching, at his request,was
in his own room; and, as he listened to
the precious truths of the gospel, his soul
feasted, his heart rejoiced, his eyes over
flowed with the comfort of the Holy
Ghost. So death came to him less as an
enemy, than in the form of an angel
fresh from the presence of the Lord, and
bringing something of the splendor of
that presence with it. In what the poet
pictures as “the Arch Fear,” he saw
rather “the Gateway to Glory,” and
stepped gladly through to be forever
Avith the Lord.
Beautiful life this; beautiful in its
length; beautiful in the manner in which
it was spent; beautiful in what in it ac
complished: beautiful the example it
left behind for those of us who yet linger
on the shore.
A PLAN OF CAMPAIGN AND A LEADER.
Now that the official exponent of the
Georgia Democracy has inaugurated a
campaign, it becomes necessary for the
party to take counsel as to a platform
and a leader.
For many years the Georgia Democra
cy was looked to with great solicitude
and interest. The party was strong, har
monious, possessed of leaders of strong
and practical sense. The cotton states
of the south were content to follow’ the
lead of Georgia. Opportunity is afford
ed her to re-assume the proud position.
It is safe to say that the Georgia de
mocracy, iu common with the majority
of the party iu the other states, will in
sist upon the Cincinnati platform at
Chicago, as embodying the best conserv
ative sentiment of the party and as cal
culated to bring about the most harmo
nious action.
The selection of a leader is likely to be
j accompanied with greater difficulties. In
1 those days of booms and boomlets, when
active politicians are largely controlled
by their personal preferences, and press-
Jes are subsidized by the tapping of
“bari’s,” a wide divergence of opinion is
manifested.
Fortunately for the democratic party,
the presidential candidate is indicated to
some extent by the plan which promises
success.
Mr. Tilden was nominated in 1876
upon the idea that he could carry New
York, the pivotal state, and that this,
with the support of the solid south, Con
neticut, New Jersy and Indiana, would
secure his election. It w r as a plan as op
posed to the suggestion that there was
between the south and w’est a community
©f matoviiJ ©lid poKfiefcl int.puocfs The
result vindicated the wisdom of the
plan. The election really went to the
democrats.
It may be observed that Mr. Tilden,
in the midst of the diplomatizing,
dancing and sparring attributed to him
by sundry reporters and politicians, has
firmly adhered to the idea that the dem
ocrats must nominate a man w T ho can
carry New York. The republicans ad
mit that it is the pivotal state—the real
battle ground of the presidential cam
paign.
There will be 401 votes in the electo
ral college. Of these 153 will be cast by
the following southern states: Alabama,
Arkansas, Delaware, Florida, Georgia,
Kentucky, Louisiana, Maryland, Missis
sipi, Missouri, South Carolina, North
Carolina, Tennessee, Texas, Virginia
and West Virginia.
Besides these 153, tho democrats will
need 48 votes to have a majority. The
states which are counted as doubtful are
New York, Ohio, Connecticut, Indiana,
California and Nevada, having in all 91
votes. To this list the republicans
would add New Jersey, with nine votes,
although, it may be safely reckoned as
democratic. In 1880, Nevada, Califor
nia and New Jersey cast their electoral
votes for Hancock. This year they will
probably give their total of tw’enty to the
democratic nominee, leaving twenty
eight to secure. Ohio and Connecticut
would supply these, with one to spare,
or Ohio and Indiana, with ten to spare.
But New York alone, with it thirty-six
electoral votes, would elect the democrat
ic candidate, and allow the loss of Ohio,
Indiana and Connecticut, besides Cali
fornia.
If these figures may be relied upon,
they show the absolute necessity for a
leader who can carry the state of New
York.
It may be assumed that Mr. Tilden is
an impossible candidate. His physical
condition is an insurmountable barrier
to any hope from him. Therefore, if the
Georgia democracy proposes to enter
the contest with a desire or intention
and a hope to win, the time has come
when it shall cast about for a leader who
can meet the- conditions referred to
Above.—Telegraph & Messenger.
A Philadelphia man compels his daugh
ter to eat onions every night for supper,
and thus assures himself that he oan shut
the house at 10 o’clock without locking
in a strange man.
“Are you keeping Lent?” inquired
Mr. Greatheart of Mr. Simkins one day
last Week. “Why certainly. I kept borrow
ing until the seasons played out and now
I’m keeping Lent.”
Dispatches from Egypt all unite in
praising the bravery of the Arabs. This
is to be expected when it is remembered
I that Arabs have the courage to marry
1 more than one wife.
SAM BROWN.
He Talks About Breaking up A
Camp Meeting—Mad Dogs—
Spring Weather. Etc., Eto-
Long time ago the Methodists used to
have some big camp-meetings iu South
j Carolina. There was a large pine thick
et out there called Mt. Zion. I never
could see why a pine thicket should be
called Mt. Zion, but this one was called
: that, anyway. The people" built some
j shanties around this place, and everv
| year they would come for fifty miles to
i the big camp-meetings. Asa general
j thing they preached all day and nearly
\ ail night. About daylight every morn
ing the old bugle-horn would ring out on
the mellow’ air and arouse every one
from sleep. Then the preachers would
take it turn about all daylong until dark,
and then on and on until nearly daylight
| again. These old camp-meetings were
very large occasions; they were, certain.
I Some folks w’ould come to get religion,
some to show’ off their finery, some to
i swap horses, some to get something good
Ito eat, and some to do their courting.
| (This is what I came for).
There was one little preacher who "was
considered a wheel-horse among the
preachers, because he could holler loud
er and last longer, than any of the rest.
He was very high tempered—rather
waspish like, and could beat a gipsy
trading homes. One day lie cheated a
sorter wildish kind of fellow mighty bad
in a horse trade, and we boys teased the
fellow a good deal about it. He got
powerful sore over the little matter, and
we considered, it wise to stop the teasing.
Well, the next morning the little preach
er took the stand early and selected for
his text a passage of scripture that
sounded sorter like “Rag-tag and bob
tailed.” He preached and preached and
preached, and kept on repeating his
text until every one in the crowd learned
it by heart. He got into a powerful
weaving way and compared a young lady
in love to a hollow pine sappling. The
fellow what he had traded horses with
said his sweetheart was better than fifty
Metliodist preachers, and he was not
going to put up with that thing much
longer. He kept on getting madder and
madder until he just couldn’t stand it
any longer and he picked up a rock, let
drive, and knocked the little old preach
er clear out of the pulpit. You may not
believe it, but that was the beginning of
the biggest row I ever saw at a camp
meeting; it was, certain. The people
got to fighting all around me, and, for
fear-1 might get hurt, I climbed a con
venient pine sappling. The fellow what
knocked the preacher out of the pulpit
gathered up a chair and frailed into a
crowd of niggers that were standing
close by, and scattered them like black
birds. These niggers were perspirating
pretty freely—for it was powerful hot
weather—and they were standing nearly
under the sappling up which I had
climbed. The chair was wagged fear
fully fast, and little aromatic particles
that were lighter than the air began to
perambulate around my nose. It was
right then that a riddle suggested itself
to my mind: Why is a nigger like a
rose? Ans. Because he is born to
blush unseen. Again, why is a nigger
not like a rose? Ans. Because he does
not waste his fragrant sweetness on the
desert air. This riddle was not thought
of until I told it, and since that time lots
of people have made out like they
created it. But it is my riddle. I fath
ered it, and I think I have a right to it;
I do, certain. But going back to the
subject, that row busted up the camp
meeting; it did, certain. That little
preacher what got knocked out of the
pulpit fled the country. He said the
people in that part of the country w T ere
possessed of the devil, and ho was not
going to try to get the devil out of them
any more. I think that preacher acted
very wisely; 1 do,certain.
The papers all over the country are
talking about mad dogs, and lam very
much afraid that some blamed old mad
dog will bite my dog Pup. A dog went
mad when I lived in South Carolina, and
it was the grandest sight I ever saw.
The dog bit a pig, the pig bit a hen, the
hen bit a duck, the duck bit a goose, the
goose bit a calf, and the calf bellowed so
loud until the people couldn’t sleep.
The people armed themselves; some got
guns, some pistols, some sticks, some
fence rails, some buggy whips, and
some broom handles. The country was
scoured from one end to the other. At
last the little old mad dog was found in
Spears’ lield and killed. That was a
good thing; it was, certain. I would ad
vise my friends and neighbors to 101 l
every mad dog they come across. It is
a good plan. I wouldn’t have my dog,
Pup, bit by a mad dog for five dollars.
By the way, my friend Biles killed £
mad dog a few days ago. That was the
best thiug he ever did in his life; it was,
certain.
Some people may like spring weather,
but I don’t. It is the laziest weather in
the world. I feel as lazy during the
spring as Jim Milam is during the win
■ ter. Speaking of spring weather re
minds me of a little incident what hap
pened when I was living with old man
Spears at the hatter’s shop. Spears’
daughter was going to a neighbor’s
house one day, and on her way she met
' a fruit tree agent, who thought he would
be mighty polite, and asked her if she
didn’t think the weather was just t<x>
nioe for anything. She snfiled .as sweet
as she knew how, and he then remarked
that vegetation was putting out power
ful fast. She got pretty mad when he
said that, but she was afraid to say any
thing for fear she would make a mistake.
When she got home sfie told me about
it, and asked me if the fruit tree agent
didn’t mean ticks and fleas when he stud
vegetation. She said they were the only
things w hat she knew’ that were putting
out so powerful fast. I think that girl
was about right, for if vegetation in
early spring don’t mean ticks and fleas,
it don’t mean anything. I went out
hunting the other day, and I know there
were a million ticks on hie when I got
back home. The next day I sat down
under Col. Byals’ barn shelter, and
about ten times that many fleas pranced
up my breeches legs. Some people may
like ticks and fleas, but if there is any
thing in the world that Ido despise, it
is these here varmints what you call
ticks and fleas. Death will find me
yours. Sam Brown.
SIFTED SBimiEBIXGS.
Culled From the Four Points of the Compass
And Spread OGt Before oor Readers
—A water color exhibition: The stock
maket.
—Political Pressure: The candidate’sfer
vent grip.
—The “tramp, tramp, tramp,boys are
marching.
—A boom iu spanking is the most ur
gent need of the day.
—March, that most delightful month,
actually blew’ itself out.
—Cincinnati can now be considered
the murderer’s Paradise lost.
—A tememperance boom is sweeping
over New Jersey. Apple-jack must go
down.
—The horrors of house cleaning now
produce the usual crop of bad spring
puns.”
—Woman is called man’s best friend,
probably because she often gets the best
of him.
—The Jersey mosquitos and summer
boarding hous keepers, are sharpening up
their bills.
—The Chinese must go. San. Francis
co had a shaking up by an earthquake
last w’eek.
—April showers have commenced and
they will soon bring April flowers—“vio
lets, blue violets!”
—Mrs. Langtry has had hem elf photo
graphed in “Peril.” She is in the act
of falling over her feet,
—“Tho art that conceals art,” as the
thief remarked when he slid an expensive
painting under his coat.
—Easter is the time w r hen the liens are
expected to cackle a round-de-lay.
America expects every hen to do her
duty.
—“Oh, my!” exclaimed little Edith,
upon her first entrance to the roller-skat
ing rink; “they’re all on casters, ain’t
they.”
—An Indian brass band lias been formed
in Montana and you may. as well be pre
pared to hear of the linching of a lot of
Indians.
—ls the new publication which is de
voted to electric matters to be classed
under the head of light reading or flash
literature?
—“At the party last night I noticed
you were a little too much like the toasts. ”
“Why; how’ were the toasts?” “They
W’ere drank!”
—A medical journal speaks of “humor
in the stomach. ” We suppose the pa
tient had eaten some buns. Or some
artijokes, maybe.
—Proctor says that Jupiter i3 in the
same state now that the earth w T as in
4,000,000 years ago. Let’s see, what
state was that, Ohio?
—A person who refuses to disclose his
name has given Yale College $50,000 for
a dormitory. It is possible that the do
nor is an ex-policeman.
—lt is to be hoped that Wiggins has
predicted stormy weather for the remain
der of the spring, as it is desire able to
have a sunshiny May.
—The numerous Ohio friends of Lynch
law made a long-continued and most des
perate effort a week ago to wipe out the
Berner outrage on its majesty.
—Now is Senator John Sherman’s op
portunity. He should have an investigating
committee look into the Cincinnati affair.
Quite a number cf voters w r ere killed.
—“What a shocking preacher our new
minister is!” “Shocking preacher? Why
I thought him very eloquent.” “Yes, so
do I; electrifies his hearers, you know.”
—“Ah !” sighed Brown, “this life is
full of disappointments.” “Yes,” replied j
Fogg, glancing significantly at Mrs. F., '
“and some disappointments are full of
life.”
—“You can lead a horse to water, but
you can’t make him drink,” says the old
saw. You couldn’t make some men
drink, either, if you took them to a hy
drant.
—Ex-Senator Conk ling recently admit
ted in court that “great men are liable
to make mistakes.” The honorable gen
tleman ought to know what he is talking
about,
NUMBER 50.
—Somelxxly assorts that dead pul lie
men should be let alone. This journal
subscribes to that sentiment but will
deal with their lives when occasion re
quires.
—lit is evident that leap year has com
pletely demoralized oupid. Any way
; his name appears on the Brooklyn police
court record on a charge of drunk
enness.
—A girl who elopes with a man named
Pickles can hardly expect a sweet honey
moon unless she understands the nmch
ooveted art of extracting sunbeams from
cucumbers.
—The only man who has not heard of
the Cincinnati riot is John Sherman. Ho
is trying to make a riot at Danville, Ya.,
for himself and is completely absorbed
by the effort.
—A Chicago man has discovered a won
derful force that is going to supplant the
steam engine. It is probably a motive
power caused by confining boarding
house butter in a strong iron box.
—lt won tbe very long before every
married man will have a wife who can
sew buttons on a shirt. In the public
schools at Springfield, Mass., one of the
studies taught is sewing on buttons.
—lt is not so much the flattering of
others that hurts us jus the flattery of
self. Humau nature is apt to flatter it
self on the flattery of others, which, if it
was not the case.no harm would come of
it.
—Lord Gannoyle is called the “Freddy
Gebhard of England.” Well this is too
bad. Freddy may be n very naughty
man but it seems like persecution to put
him and Lord Gannoyle on the same
list. "
—Every woman has an undoubted
right to a house, a husband and a half
dozen babies—if she can get them. This
is leap year, and if she don’t rnttke a vig
orous jump after her rights she deserves
to get left.
—Georgia reports at least one lucky
man. He sued a man for twelve thou
sand dollars, won his case, collected his
money and had seventy-five dollars left
sifter settling with his lawyer. Some men
are born lucky.
—David Davis says that there is no
economist like a careful wife. David has
come to this conclusion since he discov
ered that the beautiful awnings over his
library windows had been made out of
the backs of bis old vests.
—A Toledo doctor takes strong
grounds on the transmission of disease
by kissing, forbidding callers to kiss any
of bis children. Wait imtil your daught
ers grow up, doctor, and then see how
your cautions will operate.
—Those contemplating picnicking in
the woods this summer should not forget
that there are ten thousand known species
of beetles. With this variety every lady
in the party can be given an excuse for
climbing a tree and screaming.
—“You should never say ride when you
mean drive,” says and Englishman. “You
oalv ride ou a horse; in any conveyance
you drive.” Oh! you do, do you? Well,
in this country" most of us keep a coach
man to do the driving while we ride.
—A boy in New York,last week dressed
himself in his mother’s clothes and then
hanged himself. He probably discovered
that women’s clothes were no improve
ment to a man’s appearance and so he
concluded this world w-as no place for
him to live in.
—The romance is all taken out of the
idea of running away from home when
a hoy r who has done so has to work in a
cotton field at sixteen cents a day, along
with a lot of negroes. Such was the ex
perience of a sixteen year old boy of New
London, Conn.
—A young man with a head like a
calf’s, is on exhibition in Paris. Such a
deformity is unfortunate, but there are,
judging by their actions, lots of young
men in the world with not only" a calf ’a
head on their shoulders, but the head
contains calf’s braius.
—“Genius,” say T s Matthew Arnold “is
mainly an affair of energy-.” Then sar
castic people wiio have been caustically al
luding to Mr. Sullivan as a Boston genius
am’t so far out of the way after all. If
Mr. Sullivan’s slugging match isn’t main
ly an affair of energy, we don’t know
what it is;
—“How time flies,” remarked Mrs.
Hustle as she was hurrying to get ready
for the opera. “Yes,” remarked her
husband, who had fallen into a drowse
while waiting for her, “yes, it will soon
be fly- time.” And now he can’t think
what made his wife so crankey all the
evening.
—A Boston firm advertises a book of
dialect poems, “written on the rail.”
Dialect poets have accumulated so rapid
ly within a few- years that we sue not
surprised to hear that one of them has
been ridden on a rail. He may consider
himself lucky that he escaped the tar
and feathers.
—An Alabama paper complains that
“the country is almost iitterally overrun
with negro preachers, who are multiply
ing by scores and hundreds. The colored
brother instinctively takes to politics or
preaching, the latter being the favorite
calling by a large majority-.” Of course
preaching is the favorite calling. There
are more “yellow legged chickens”served
to preachers than to politicians.