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UP WAS THE PIE.” In th* night— noleinn right— I awoke In fe&iful fright, And my chart Seemed op preened At If lead—heavy lead— A ton or more of dead Weight was profiting;- cruelly pressing— On my cliost! And a demon wib u pie—hot mine© pie— lurched upon my bedpost high; And blue devil* Held their revels O er my brain—aching brain Backed with pa|n, And kept dancing—madly prancirg On xny brain. Then 1 cry*—wildly cry: 44 Give me rest, or let me dlo; Let me deep** Sweetly sleep.” Bui the demon perched on high— Yea ! tbe demon with tb* pie— Honrue'y ehrited, 14 Never-never!” Quoth the devilt, 44 Haul17 everl” Than the joke— Joke- Startled me, anU I awoke Awoke in pain, Half insane, And I said— aimp y M>td: 44 Do I dream, or am 1 dead? Have I fallen out of l ed?” From ih" "loom there caino reply; 4< Silent Ik*, „ It was the p*e ! M —Toronto Grip. THE CONDUCTOR’S STORY. I think it iH Emerson who nays, “ When you pay for your ticket and get into tbo car, you have no guess v hat food company you shall find there, on buy much that is not rendered in the bill.” I lmvo found this remark eminently true on several occasions, particularly when my life-long friend Roth bears mo company. Ruth is the most unconventional of women. She travels, as she does every thing else, with wholosouled earnestness, and finds bread where most people would gather only stones. Thus, re cently being in the roar ear ot the long train, she preferred standing on the platform and drinking in at one draught that magnificent valley through which wo seemed Hying than by tantalizing sips, as one has to ilo from behind a narrow car window. I followed her. I always do. And, holding on to the narrow railing, wr. felt somewhat like two lost comets whirling through space. Soon the door behind us banged, and a gentleman in the midsummer of life, with a face aa class ically beautiful as Edwin Booth's and a waist of Falutiiffian dimensions, joined ns. He beamed on us literally. From the dimple in his fair soft chin to the ring of brown, silky hair which lay upon his brood, smooth forehead, tlio ex pression scintillated with intelligent good nature. Withal, there was such a retrosjiectivo background to tlio sunny brightness that, after*a few common places, Ruth, the darling, honest, im pudent creature, said, looking up mean while into his face with a smile so honest and kindly tlmt he would have been a Hersekeanot to have reflected it: “Sir, permit mo to remark that you are a physical incongruity.” "Not so bad ns that, madam, 1 hope. I am merely a conductor, as by this time you have discovered, and a pretty well balanced one, independent of avoirdupois." "But your thoughtful face, sir, that is what, perplexes me. It should belong to a body but one-third the weight of yours,” suggested Ruin, the wise disci ple of Lavuter. “My face is all right," ho replied, strki’'g his checks and chin with mu air of marveloussolf-ooniplueoney. " It stopped growing ten years ago, but it is here,” touching tbo region of hi.s dia phragm with the tip of his trout fore finger, “thatcontentment and my rare good luck shows itself. Once 1 \r a iis thin as l'otor Hehenauel’a siiiidi.w, and "—ho paused, looking into Ruth's clear, gray eyes as if lie would sound her soul's depths—“l am strongly tempted to tell you my bit of it romance, toi there is a long stretch ahead, anil you look like one of the kind to euj >y a twin'll of nature. Isn't it so?" Tlio conductor had struck the very keynote of our needs. Wo .were pining lor a veritable California story, told in an unconventional way ; to be told, too, under such peculiar circumstances would bo an added spicu, anil thus be sought him to immediately yield to temptation. "I am an old sttiger,” he said, "at least as far back us tile spring of 1850, With a blanket strapped upon my back, 60 ceuts in my pants pocket, and the biggest stock of hope and unused en ergy that ever made n lad's heart as light as a balloon, 1 tramped along hero in my search for the ‘gold diggings.* My ambitiou vvaa higher than those buttes yonder by thousands of feet, end the top was to bo capped by sulid geld," pointing as ho spoke to three siugnUi and isolated iwaks we wore just then passing, known aatho Marysville buttes, whose volcanic heights looked as inao oessibie to us ns tlnur |eala> seemed brown and barren. “It appears to me,” said Ruth, meas uring the most precipitous sides of those lofty and laysWiiuut hills, “that whim a man aspires to touch the key ho would want a higher guerdon than mere gold ; not, however, that I hold the metal in oontempt.” “ I had, madam, an 1 that was the whole matter. I was and speratelv in love—that was n solemn fact expressed in aa few words as poasildc, and I la'- lieve that she loved me, but the top ot Mount Shasta was not more unattain able to mo than Jennie. Her father, an old Philadelphia druggist, had money, and I as ambitious for his daughter ns he was proud. 1 felt, that 1 could * move a mountain,’ if I could find a mountain to move ; so Jennie ami I said gix-d-hv one afternoon under an old oak in F.ur moulit Park, and in the very depths of my heart I believed that aho would be true to me. It was not a severe seven days ride in a palnoo-car from New York to San Franeiseo in tnose days, and the tall, aleudor, hungry, penniless lad, who tramped along here twenty nine years ago, seeking his fortuueli-ke another Dick Whittington, was a weary and homesick one os well. ” "By ’ here,’ which you have twice used, do you mean this veritable valley of the Sacramento ?” said Hath. ** The very same. My objective [siint. was a place now famous in tile annals of that period called ‘ Bid well’s Bar,’ ou account of a rich bar in the Feather river full of golden sand, which was discovered by Gen. JJidwell. The place was man y miles from me ; tbe count ry was thinly settled. I did not know a soul (for even tramps were scarce in those early days), and so my courage and lees gave oat to gether. Pulling off my lxxits about 5 o’elock one sultry day, I bored my blis tered feet to the cool evening bronze, and, creeping into a clump of young maiizauitas, fell asleep, hoping that I would never awake again this side of the •tars. I did, however', oouscions that my toes were being licked in a gentle fashion, and discovered that it was l>e ing done by a brown setter dog, alunt as hungry looking and generally dilapi dated as I was myself. “ Where he came from I never know, but. looking into his half-hnman eyes, we speedily entered into a sort of dumb compact to trudge oatogwh*-r* Mound that ttto jour fuUt>w (i utwf gooldOftil him a brute) had a sore knee, inflamed and bleeding. I tore a strip off from my last linudkerchief to bind it up, mid, in place of the Good Samaritan’s oil anil wine, gave him my last scrap of cold bacon. It is strange, but, forlorn as I was in those days, I recall them with a tender pleasure almost unac countable. It I had been raised a Brah min I would have believed that some im mortal spirit of unfailingcheerfulness -mi unending resources was imprisoned in that dog’s body. Hid you ever read the fairy legend of ‘the White Cat,’who, after she had persuaded the young prill'■ •, her lover, to cut off' her head and tail slid throw them in the fire, tu ld'jnly stood before him a woman, fair as Aurora? Fritz, for that was tho name by which I called the dog, looked at me with Jennie’s brown eves, half roguish, half thoughtful, and together wo resumed our journey. Nor would I have followed in the wake of the young Prince, even had I known tho result would have been similar, for Fritz, tho dog, was invaluable just os lip was. All loneliness wu,“. gone now that ho rarely left my side, anil although our shadows had grown less liy tlio time we reached tho * bar * nur immaterial entities were in prime order for everything in the shape of adventure. ‘Have never seen any gold dug.’ Then I’ll not at this late day spoil your first impression of a minor’s camp by describing mine ; as 1 approached Bid well’s bar, I may say, though, that one might have supposed an earthquake or tornado hail been at work there, tearing up the hundreds of thousands of cubic feet that had been moved and removed by mortal hands in their frantic, persistent search for gold. “Tho bar was a world in miniature. Almost every nationality was there rep resented, and almost every feature of human kind but humanity. Armed with a pick, pan and shovel, I, like thousands of others, begun to dig and burrow and wash dirt. But my labor and its results would not balance, for somehow my little leather lmg of gold dust got no heavier, toil as I would. Wages being good, I stopped digging and Uiroil myself ns a camp soullnm. I did every kind of job bing within the range of a minor’s wants. Washing dirty flannel shirt* and cotton overalls, patching leather trousers and cooking flapjacks, is not the most digni fied and flower-strewn path of fortune, you must know; and to a boy whose ideas of chivalry, independence and deeds of knightly valor were purely Byronio such n fate, yon must acknowledge, was a sort of poetic injustice. My aim, though, was to earn enough money with which to buy a certain claim of which f knew; and that I had in advance labeled ‘ Bonanza.’ “I might, have succeeded, but I was prostrated by a malarial lever, and for flays and weeks lay unconscious nt, the tender mercy of a few rough Welsh miners with human hearts. My little hoard of money and mv energy melleil away together like Npring snow. But for Fritz I'd have died of disappoint ment alone. He hail adopted the ‘never say die’ motto, mid I often rend in his glorious eyes the sentence, ‘ You great old coward ! At him again I' us a tender and npp.vcintivo sympathy which tho gift of speech could not have made more iiHsiiring. My nurses had pitched me a tout on the south Hide of a low hill and Imd left me to get well at my leisure. My ‘bottom dollar’ had dwindled to the value of a dime, my legs to the thick ness of a pair of tongs (for all appetite was gone), and one evening hope failed' me. Isi lioving I was going to die. 1 re solved to do the fair thing by Jennie, apprise her of the event and advise her to forget me. By the flickering light of a bit of fallow candle I began the letter, the first I hinl written for months. I thought aloud uud wrote, Fritz lay be side me, his nose wedged between his paws, but I knew by the twitch of his ears that 1m understood every word I was writitig. “ I lmd reached the climax of renun ciation and wretchedness —or, rather, my expression of it- -when 1m suddenly rose mill wont out. I soon hoard him pawing and tearing and scratching the earth about si v foot from me, as though ho was under contract to dig a tunnel to China before daylight. Thinking lie had found the burrow of a wolf or fox, 1 called him off, but he was ns dent as a lut to my voice. Homing the candle, 1 hurried to the spot, around which lay a half bushel of gravel, which ho had loos ened, ivtu u my eye caught the gleam of a dull, rod streak that veined a piece of quart/, about tho silo of an egg lying among the free earth. \Yulil you be lieve it? That streak was worth SSO, for it was yirgin gold. Nor was it, the onlyoho upon that-hillside. Fritz lmd found a loilo (thanks to a gopher), and I thereby hud found a fortune. As soon as possible 1 hud tho gold of that pre cious stone wrought of my own design ing, all of it, at least-, but. the contents of the blunt, corner, whjch, in its native roughness, 1 had mounted ns a simple brooch. Sending these to Jennie, I—” “An act of great gonofosity, sir, I think," interrupted Ruth, with a laugh able glint in her eye. “One would Have thought you would have preserved snob n piece of rare good fortune ns a memo rial stone.” “You anticipate mo, madam. It was ns a memorial that 1 sent my first bit of treasure, but I expected to get it back again in two years, the giri with it.” “Ami did you?" "No; nor even received a letter of acknowledgment that my offer had been accented. Nothing finds gold quicker than gold, when a msui lias onoe got a fair share of it, and in two rears 1 had, in various ways, secured §20,000. In vesting it, as *1 thought, safely, I re turned to Philadelphia in ail the" pride of a conquering hero. My story ought to end here, to wind up with a* chime of wedding-bells and a beautiful Ruchol as my reward for faithful serving, but I Lad scarcely arrived when I heard, inci dentally, that Jennie had gone with her father to Europe, nor left on* sign that she ever remembered me.” “ You certainly did not let that fact dampen the ardor of your pursuit?” queried Ruth; “you followed her, of course,” “I did no suoh thing, madam. I re turned to San Francisco and plunged ii * > the excitement of gold-hunting wih a recklessness that a woman can not understand. Bis months after that I lost every dollar, but by that time I had learned that experience is worth nothing na solid capital until it has Iwu dearly bought. I whistled my rhyme: Lo*f nl gain, ;>wir- and i>iio, Buiuc tl' iiisav f in the sensitive car of my frioud Fritz, hugged his own browu head close to my ah milder-—don't laugh, that dog was my friend— rolled up my sleeves, and again went to work with a vigor that I knew meant certain success if win held out. It did, and five years afterward I had h hank account which ran largely to the thousands. 1 invested it in land. By that time I was s bachelor of 30. U.qrd knocks and diaapjxnnt oiuul bad shaken fll the romance out cf ' me, ami when I again w vat East it was on business connected with the con struction of this railroad.” “And you have quite outlived your boyish fancy, as your heart began to lose its youth ? ” said Ruth, with the least bit of cynicism in her tone. “ I think Fritz knew,” said the con ductor, quietly. “ I hail become almost a misanthrope for his sake. If I left him to go into society—such as we had— for a few hours, he either w hined like a sick child or kept up such an increasing bark ing and baying that to save him from be ing shot as* a nufcmiice I went to no place where it was impossible for him to ac company me. The old fellow went with me even to New York, and pn tho jour ney I often caught myself cogitating how lie, bom in a wilderness of wild mustard, and as fond of camp life os an Indian, would take to tho constraint of an old city. Well, I had not been in New York a" week before there was a strong tugging at my heart to run down to Philadelphia. Not that it was home for me, for my parents had died before I first left it. I called the desire ‘ the charm of association,’ and it led me. “ There, as I fitst went, down Arch street, my poor dog lost his wits and the sober dignity of liis maturity. He had a remarkably fine scent. I always knew that, but no sooner had we turned into that particular street than, with his nose close to the ground and rigid tail, he ran zig-zag to and fro, as though he was on the trail of an erratic fox. I called him, but lie gave no heed, People got out t f his wav. The gamins shouted, and with anilil, shrill bark he suddenly bounded into the doorway of a large dry goods store. I bounded after him in time to see him rush up to a lady in black, who was examining some gloves, and danced around her with signs of the most extravagant joy. There are tones that live without the aid of photographs. ‘ Roy 1 Roy I Hoar old Roy,’ was all she said, but I'd have sworn tiie voice was Jennie’s if 1 Jiml heard it on the summit of Mont Blanc. A white hand was laid upon his head and my ring was on tho hand.” Ho paused. “ Yours? sir. I liojie you did not claim it,” said the practical collocutor. “I did, and the hand which wore it, just ns I originally intended.” Nor did Alexander, in his hours of conquest, ever smile a more serene approval of himself thau our conductor at this stage of tlio story. “ But tho conduct of Fritz, and the lady’s silence, and the queer concomi tants which exist only in fiction—how do you recompile them with au o’er true tale ?” said Ruth, the truth-loving. “ Fritz was Roy, the Roy who had often boon caressed by Jennie before libs young master, Jennie’s cousin, got the golden fever, when I did, and came to California never to return. Jennie lmd written, but her letters lmd nover reached mo. She thought mo dead. Why the dog came to me when his mas ter died is one of the riddles of my life, which I will disentangle in tho horo uftir.” “ Anil to-day where is she?” We stood waiting for the answer. “ On our ranch near Sacramento, and I believe one of tho happiest women in the State. Wo have a boy 10 years old whose name is Fritz, and all tiie dearer for the sake of the old friend who Ims gone where I hope one day to meet the human of him. I wish you would stop off a bit and see my wife. Queer, isn’t it, that I should have introduced this bit of private history upon you ? but tho truth is—Yes—coming ! I’ll bo with you again, ladies.” A brakeman beckoned him inside, and wo bud uoeii the last of our handsome conductor. The evening shadows hail beguft to lengthen. The setting sun, lmd turned tlio vast plain of tho Sacramento valley into a “ field of the cloth of gold,” end tlio distant peaks of the Sierras, elail in their eternal snow, but now rose-tinted and glowing, seemed to cleave the azure above them us with a \Cedge of burnished silver. It was starlight when we reached tlio end of our car ride aud were regis tered for the night. “Tho conductor's story was a pleas ant little episode, Ruth, wasn’t it ? Do you believe it all happened?” I asked, as I leaned from my pillow to hors to leave a good-night kiss on her round cheek. “ 1 liko Fritz,” was the sleepy answer. “There’s an instinct about some dogs that the half of mankind can neither ap preciate nor maintain. I trust a man whom a good dog loves.” Moves of Stnmhoiil. “The traffic in househokl slaves," says the St. James’ Ornette, “goes on as briskly as over in Stnmboul, notwith standing the slave trade treaty with England. There are two well-known dealers, whose establishments nre at Toplmneh, one of 'them named Omor, the other Knfedjioghi RJsehid. These men bny and sell and keep always on hand a considerable stock, which is open tp inspection of buna jide customers. Those are principally in the tipper ranks of Turkish society, and the class of goods moet in demand is youth, in the fynn of neat lads of twelve to sixteen, or maidens of like age, or even younger, if blonde and blue-eyed- fast colored, so to say, as not liable to turu yellow or swart with advancing years. Both Otpea aud Ivafedjioglu Rescind operate largely iu refugees, and in so doing they liavoQomo into collision with Riza Bey, the Presi dent of the Refngee Relief Commission. For there is an imperial irade which de clares all refugees free, aud although Riza probably dot s not earo much about slavery for its own sake, the subject be comes interesting as soon as it presents itself iu the form of a lever of vexation against his neightiors. In the last fort night five, or rather six, transactions in mMiirus have come under notice. The object of tho first was Fatuich, a Turkish girl from Pliilipivipolis whom Omer had picked up a bargain and whom he first sold Ragsime Khanoum, widow of one Balmomndji, a a lady in easy circum stances, who, however, returned Futmeh upon Omor's hands, and she was resold to Aveslie Khanoum. Next name tbe ease of Emethalo, a girl fromSoukhoum, whom Captain, ill the Imperial Navy had brought thence when she was of too tender age to be advantageously market able. Through the good offices of Omer, acting as broker, this young lady has become the property of Ali Effendi, a gentleman residing much at Ins east' in Besliiktash. Following tho case ot Emeihale caino that of Allcstiue, also from Sonklioum, who was bought from Omer by Kosah Rescind Boy for 8,500 piasters. J. Higgins, in the Popular Science Monthly, writes that experiment lias shown that animals confined in a dose apartment where they must inhale over and over again their own exhalations, develop tubercle of the lungs, aud that human beluga are no less injured by breathing the air of poorly ventilated rooms, ho thinks is proved by the fact that of eleven preachers who di*d during eight years m tile county of Philadd puny 4wd ri voasatuirtwii. THE GREAT SCRAP-BOOK MAKER. A Colored Janitor’* Unique Llbrarj-Oc* Hundred Hook* or CllppluK*. [Philadelphia Timee.J A bad memory and a desire to preserve the good things he read in the news papers led Joseph W. H. Cathcart twenty-five years ago to begin scrap book making. Now he has a library of one hundred volumes, made up entirely of dippings and covering a great variety of subjects, showing at once the broad range of the collector’s tastes and the wide scopo of the journalism of the past quarter of a century. Cathcart is jani tor of the building 303 Walnut street, and has held that position for half liis lifetime. In his room is a large book case filled with neatly-bound volumes each with the character of its contents stamped in gold upon the back, with the name of the compiler, followed by the mysterious letters “O. S. B. M-," which, as translated by Mr. Cathcart, means ‘ ‘Great Scrap-Book Maker. ” In proof of his bad memory the collector was unable to tell without consulting his books when he first began his work. An examina tion of his first collection of clippings furnished tho date, December 16, 1856, and the first clipping was found to be an advertisement offering a reward for the capture of a runaway slave. The lost book compiled is a pamphlet, which when bound will bear the title, “ Mayor King and His Black Policemen.” It is mado up of all the newspaper articles relating to the appointment of colored men on the police force. '1 he titles of some of the volumes will givo an idea of tlio subjects covered. Three large volumes are devoted to “China and Japan,” anil are mado up of more than a thousand clippings. “ In cidents in the Life of Jefferson Davis” fill two volumes, which are followed by four bulky books, entitled “Anxious In quirers.’' Then come four good-sized volumes of “ Sermons and Religious Scraps,” next to which “The Assassina tion of Lincoln and Trial and Execution of the Conspirators,” is given place in a book of many hundred pages. “Odd Fellows and Good Templars” are repre sented next in a single volume, ns are also “Men and Women of 1808 and 1869.” Three large volumes, among (he neatest in the collection, are devoted to “Colonel Forney’s Letters anil European Corre spondence.” Next to Colonel Forney’s letters is a volume inscribed “Life and Heath of dairies Sumner,” and another “Comic Sketches.” One of tho most in teresting books in the collection and, perhaps, the most valuable, is “Poetry of the Rebellion,” which contains about one thousand war songs. Another in teresting volume and the largest in the library is “The Colored People and the Passenger Railroads and Railroad Mat ters of the United States.’’ This book contains 682 pages. No less than eight bulky volumes are devoted t “Weseott’s History of Philadelphia.” Three vol umes are filled ‘ with “Masonic Scraps” and five with clippings concerning “En franchisement's Last Chapter, tho Fif teenth Amendment,” and four volumes suffice to accommodate “Tho Black Man After the Passage of Civil Rights Bill.” Five volumes contain the doings of “The Freedmen’s Bureau,” and the same number of books are made up of clippings relating to “Slavery.” “John Brown’s Insurrection” finds place in single volume, next to which are two im mense “Scrap Book of tho Rebellion.” A fat book, measuring four inches across, contains “Tho Trial of Mr. and Mrs. Twitched for the Murder of Mrs. Hill,” and another volume is a record of mur ders and executions and miscellaneous criminal nmttora. Three volumes now under way the scrap-book maker takes great pride in, being no less than “ The Crimes of Ministers.” Mr. Cathcart sets great store by his library and reckons its vulue in Bnrdid dollars very liigb. To him it represents twenty-five years of work, and he says that a man to make another such collec tion must start young and wait until all his hair has turned gray beforo it will be as complete. Patti as ft Conversationalist. Born in Bpuin, of Italian parents, ed ucated in America and pi. >sig lier ma ture life in the various capitals of Eu rope, Madame Patti is a cosmopolite. Who speaks English liko au educated American; French liko a Parisian; the beauty of her Italian all who have heard her know; German and Spanish are equally familiar to her, and she cau talk with a Russian in his own tongue. She even asserts that she can speak Welsh, and it can at leajjt be attested that she f nrlersly pronounces the name of her postoffleo in Wales, which no ono on this side of the Atlantic would attempt. It is curious to hear, her carrying on a polyglot conversation, talking business to one person, art tri another and small talk to a third, and interpreting from ono tongue to another with absolute com mand of the idioms of .each. The visitor calling after her breakfast hour will probably find a good deal of this poly glot conversation going on in animated fashion, It takes a long while for 51. Franclii, Madame Patti’s business man, to get the arrangements for the day eleafrly understood, but tlio elderly Frenchman presently takes his leave, kissing the Diva s hand with courtly obeisance, and then business is for the tune dismissed. The conversation na turally drifts to music. Madame Patti understands her own position as an art ist perfectly well. She knows that she is tho best singer in the world, for it is to that that her life has been devoted, and the consciousness of her power is one great secret of her achievement. She does not lead the talk to herself, but if you speak of her singing she will talk of it with you without the slightest af fectation. her position is simply taken for granted, and therefore she can speak of other artists with the appreciation and the culm judgment of one who is quite beyond the reach of professional jeal ousy. Like all thorough artists she lias an outspoken contempt for everything that looks like charlatanry aud a warm recognition for every honest achieve ment, in however small a way. Like other thorough artists, also, she likes appreciation, and if you have given her praise wliicli she knows to be intelligent and just, she will think you with as much apuarent earnestness as though she had net heard the same thing a hun dred times before. It is instructive us well as entertain ing to talk w ith such s woman about music. She has heard all the famous singers of the past qUutor of a century and of them all she sys that Sontag was her ideal. But Jins she scarcely needs to say. for those who heard Son tag must find her metaory recalled by Patti, and the descriptions of Sontag's method that we road in the books might be applied with scarcoli a change to her successor.— Ptiiiadclplia Times. It is beautifully remiiked that man’s mother is the repreiratative of his Maker. Misfortune aid mare crime set no barriers between tor aud her son. While his mother livts a man has one friend on oajith who wu not desert him w hen he is needy. Rtf affection flows from a puts fountain and ceases ouiy at mjv oNN t 4 vtenth’. - ’ - Stealing the Rolling Stoek. Speaking of hand cars* if we live to be as old as Susan Anthony we shall never forget our first ride on a hand car. It was about twenty-five years age—let s see, twenty-five and sixteen is forty-one ; yes, we were sixteen years old then, and it must have been twenty-five years ago, though it does not seem more than six months. It was soon after the railroad was built to Whitewater, and from there to Janesville. The section men had a hand car, one of these old-fashioned cars that run with a crank and a belt, and to see four of those Irishmen whoop through the town it looked too easy, and all the boys had an insane desire to ride on one. One Sunday morning there were six of us hoodlums down at the de pot, and the hand car was on the track, and the section men had gone to attend mass, and it was a splendid opportunity to steal a railroad, or as much of one as any of us would ever own. One of the lioys suggested that we take tlio car and run down to Janesville, some twenty miles, and have some fuu. Another boy said we could have dead loads of fun, mashing the girls, and get back in the evening. They didn’t call it “mashing ” in those days. We have forgotten the name for it, but it was the same thing exactly, only a different name. Another hoy said he knew more than twenty girls there, as he was down there once to a lynching, and they were just boss. We didn’t go much on girls at that early day, but as the boys began to pile ou the car wo didn’t propose to get left, so just as the car was moving we caught on. We thought if a pair of white linen pants and a red necktie, and low shoes, and a boughten straw hat couldn’t make an impression, while the other fellows wero getting solid, then we wouid walk home. Four of the boys pumped at a time, while two rested. We wanted to rest consid erable, but the boys wouldn’t have it, and we pumped, and pretty soon the cai went whirling through Lima, every boy looking as though he owned the railroad. Between Lima and Milton an accident occurred. Our coat-tail got caught in the belt and we were thrown over the crank, and before the thing could be stopped, one tail of the coat was ripped off', aud we fell to the deck of tlio car with a “dull thud.” We didn’t care much for the lame back, but there was a black grease spot on the elbow of the white pants as big as a milk-pan, and it was on tho same side of the house that the coat-tail had been torn off. No boy can he a success at capturing the fond affections of a Janesville girl, with one coat-tail torn off, a lame back and tar on the hind leg of a pair of white pants, and we Jmew it. After leaving Milton the road was all the way up hill, and there were six backs broke, and on arriving in Janesville about noon they were six of the sickest, tiredest-lookiiig country galoots that ever lived, and they lay down on the depot steps to rest, and fig ured up how much money was in the party to buy dinner. There was twenty cents all told, and after a crackers and cheese banquet the boys started home, part of the time walking behind the car and pushing it, and a part of the time lotting it slide. The crowd arrived home after dark, and as the car stopped at the depot the Irish section hands jumped on to the boys with sticks and fairly made them sick, and when they got homo, their parents repeated the dose, and that Sunday’s experience fairly broke up what might otherwise have been a splendid gang of mashers. Since then many rail roads have been stolen, but, it is believed the stealing of that hand car was the be ginning of railroad stealing.—Geo. IF. Costume in Nevada. Her dress was of a highly-wrought fabric of old pinchbeck gold, frosted ovei with Paris-green can-spangles, and bro caded with mahogany sawdust. There was an exquisite overskirt, shirred with hempen yarn of a unique pattern, and elegantly caught up with a costly zinc plate suspender buckle. A wreath of natural shoemakers’ wax hung in ravishing waves from the waist, while loops of molasses candy heightened tho caudal appendages of the basque-de coat. The train was massive and decol lete. It was gorgeously resplendant with a row of richly embroidered sliells de-oyster, sprinkled with assorted grains of costly coal-de-ashe. Surmounting all was a rich Oriental mantle of bag-de cordMge, which was pinioned at the right shoulder of the fair wearer with a shiugle de-nail, on which was a leviathan carved dome, wrought entirely of rare pie ces ol gum-de-spruce. The fair wearer of all this magnificent apparel wore a tin star, buried iu a per fect torrent of red-hot black-coal hair, while slio glided through tbe mazes ol the ilanoe liko a gazelle with its right arm in a sling. When she brought her pretty little Cinderella slipper down up on tho marble tiles of the festive hall, the raftors in tho building shook with silver laughter, while crockery in the cellar, like enchanted fairies, leaped up and kissed the floor underneath. When ex cited and full of enthusiasm, this lovelv Venus opened her mouth, revealing two massive rows of pearl that reminded the eneliantod beholder of trains of white washed cars gliding on wings of love through Hoosac’s magnificent tnnuel. Her musical laugh sent a thrill of delight across the mass of surging, worshiping humanity, like the trickling of cold milk punch down ti e back of a man who has just filled his boots with chocolate ice cream.— Carson Oazctte. Society. It was my fortune to be born iu the times which* produced the greatest ac tions in the history of the world. The actions have been prolonged throughout my long life. I was a living witness of the seven years’ war, afterwards of tho separation of America from England, later of the French Revolution, and finally of the Napoleonio era, to tho ruin of the chiefs, and the event which followed. I have also arrived at conclusions which must totally differ from the opin ion which those who are now bom will hold, got by tho help o! books which they will not understand. \Vhai the future may hold it is impos sible to predict; but Ido not think we shall Very soon enjoy tranquility. It is not given to the world to be moderate— to the great to deny in themselves the use of their power—to the populace to be satisfied with an humble position while they await the progress of ameli orative action. If one could make hu manity perfect, one might indulge in the fancy of a perfect society. But as it is eternally swaying from right to left, one portion must suffer while the other por tion is happy. Egotism aud envy are two foul demons who eternally torment, and party strug gles will never cease. The most reason able course is that every one should do Lis own business—that he was born to and which he has learned—and that he should not prevent others from doing theirs ; that the cobbler should stick to his bench and the laborer to his plow; aud that the King should know the sci ence of government, for that also is a business which must be learned, and which must not bo simulate! when < is oot uadwitood.— Qovihs. eccentricities of bullets. Stories Effsrillsf b Cnrl.n. Corses Take* ky Ballet*. (Phrenological Journal. } At the battle ot Peach Orchard, when McClellan was making his change of base, a Michigan infantryman fell to the ground as if shot dead, and was left ly uig in a heap as the regiment changed position. The ball which hit him, first struck the barrel of his gun, glanced and struck a button off his coat, tore the watch out of his vest pocket, and then Btruck the man over the heart, and was stopped there by aßongbook m his shirt pocket. He was unconscious for three quarters of an hour, and it was a full month before tlie black and blue shot dis appeared. At Pittsburg Landing amem ber of the 12th Michigan Regiment of Infantry stooped to give a wounded man a drink from his canteen. While in the act a bullet aimed at liis breast struck the canteen, turned aside, passed through the body of a man and buried itself in tho leg of a horse. The canteen was split oi>en aud dropped to the ground in halves. At the second battle of Bull Run, as a New York infantryman was passing his plug of tobacco to a com rade, a bullet struck the plug, glanced off, and buried itself iu a knapsack. The tobacco was rolled up like a ball of shavings, and carried ono hundred feet away. Directly in line of the bullet was the head of a Lieutenant, and had not the bullet been deflected he would cer tainly have received it. As it was he had both eyes filled with tobacco dust, and had to be led to the rear. At Brandy Station one of Custer’B troopers had his left stirrup strap cut away by a grape shot, which passed between his leg and the horse, blistering his skin as if a red hot iron had been used. He dismounted to ascertain the extent of his injuries, and as he bent over a bullet knocked his hat off and killed liis horse. In the same fight w.is a trooper who had suf fered several days with a toothache. In a hand to hand fight he received a pistol ball in his right cheek. It knocked out his aching double tooth and passed out of the left-hand corner of his mouth, taking along a part of an upper tooth. The joy of being rid of the toothache was so great that the trooper could not be made to go to the rear to have his wound dressed. Au object, however trifling, will turn the bullet from its true course. This was shown one day at the remount camp in Pleasant Valley.* They had a “bull-pen” in which about five hundred bounty jumpers and other hard cases bad been under guard. Once in a while one of these men would make a break for liberty. Every sentinel in po sition would fire, and it did not matter in the least if the man ran toward the crowded camp. On this occasion the prisoner made for the camp, and as many as six shots were fired at him without effect. One of tho bullets entered tho tent of a Captain in the 12th Pennsylva nia Cavalry. He was lying down, and the course of the bullet would have buried itself in the chest. Fortunately for him, a candle by which he was read ing sat ou a stand between him and where the bullet entered. This was struck and cut square in two, anil tho lighted end dropped to tbe floor without being snuffed out. The ball was de flected and buried iu the pillow under tho officer’s head, passed out of that and through his tent into the ono behind it, passed between two men and brought up against a camp-kettle. There is iu Detroit, Mich., a man who was wounded five times in less than ten minutes, at Fuir Oaks. The first bullet entered his left arm, the second gave him a scalp wound, the third hit him in tlio foot, the fourth buried itself in liis shoulder, ami the fiftli entered his right leg. While he was being carried to tbe rear tbe first two men who took him wore killed. While his wounds wero being dressed an exploded shell almost buried him under an avalanche of dirt. In being removed further to the rear a runaway ambulance horse carried him half a mile and dumped him out, and yet he is seemingly hale aud hearty, anil walks without a limn. Decidedly Tough Fowls. I was much amused at many* incredu lous persons doubting the truth of the statement about duck-shooting pub lished in the Richmond Dispatch, wherein a couple of hunters on the Chesapeake shot a small dipper duck, putting four loads of No. I shot into it, then ran it down with a boat, caught it, picked all the feathers from it, cut its head off and, after taking out its en trails, let it into tho water to wash it, when it gave a flop and got away, swim ming so rapidly that it took them an hour to secure it again. Perhaps this does look a little fishy, but it can be readily believed by any one that is acquainted with the tough natnro of Virginia fowls. In the fall of 18611 was a memlier of the Thirty-fourth Ohio Volunteer Infantry, and we were camp ing at Winchester, in the Shenandoah Valley. The whole country thereabout had been occupied by both Union and Confederate armies times innumerable, and all the chickens, geese, turkeys and pigs had long disappeared into the ca pacious stomachs and haversacks of tho hungry soldiers, except one old rooster, whose long spurs aud venerable appear ance had saved him from the foragers’ nimble fingers. He looked so tough that a soldier whose courage would never falter at charging an enemy’s battery shrank from the more difficult task of boiling his carcass tender enough to eat. We were out of rations, nnd hungry. My mess got sight of that old rooster, whose comb hod been worn down by the storms of many years, and bore a slight impress of the initials B. C. We were driven to desperation by the cravings of our hungry stomachs, and in a few moments we had him dressed and in a eamp kettle, boiling furiously, with a large pile of fagots collected. We were to sit up all night, by turns, and keep the fire red-hot under him, hoping by this time to have him cooked for a dainty break fast. My turn came to fire under him at four o’clock a. m. I kept him boil ing for over an hour, when sleep over came me, and I dropped off into a doze. Just at break of day, imagine my surprise at being aroused by a cry always sweet to the ears of an old soldier. That rooster had jumped up, knocked the lid off the kettle, and was sitting on the rim crow ing for daylight, as if nothing had hap pened to mar his comfort or pleasure. After arousing the camp with his clarion bugle notes, he flew down and strutted off with the importance of a field officer of the day, and my mess had no break fast. I merely make this statement to corroborate the duck-shooter’s yarn. Captains Hawkins was with me on that occasion, and can vouch for me, if any doubt that Virginia fowls are tough.— J. H. S.. Locust Corner , Ohio. “Where do naughty, bad, wicked folks go to when they die?” asked a i Sunday school teacher of her class, last Sabbath, in this city. One bright boy, who had probably heard his father talk, answered; “Chicago!” Who knows but that the boy may be right.— £> o Arnm. ' ‘ i Why Newspapers Publish Society News, The time will reach us some day when the society column will not be demanded in the newspaper, but the time has not yet arrived. The average reader’s palate relishes as a sweet morsel the account! of the movements iu society. The Now York Hour hns issued the following as tho reason why newspapers contain re ports of social actions: The publication of society news, or what is going on in fashionable society, has finally become a feature of metropoli’ tan journalism. Yet nothing is more common among fashionable people than outcries against the impertinence o( newspapers, the reporters of which in vade the privacy of their homes. There are even insinuations that the best way to be rid of this inquisitive class is to help its members down stairs with the toe of the boot. Any one who is familiar with the man agement of the great newspapers in this city, knows what a conjugal struggle the editors have to cut down the copy so as to get all the news into the paper. Tliero is little exaggeration in saying that a journal the size of the limes or tho Tri iilne could be filled every night with good matter which the editors 'of those papers strike out of copy with their blue pencils. It is condensation, , not late hours or night work, that is killing men in newspaper offices. If, them this is the case; if fashionable people thiftk that the publication of it ms about .their re ceptions, weddings and dinners is highly impertinent; and if the newspapers cau hardly find room for actual news, why do the journals in* New York print, day af ter day, descriptions of social incidents which are most uninteresting to the gen eral reader ? Tho explanation is simple enough. The fashionable people do not always tell the truth when they rail against tho intrusion of reporters into private circles. They really like to see their names in print; delight to have their receptions noticed; are in ecstasy over descriptions of their fine dresses. It cannot be denied that the newspapers print what the public demands. Not only do many fashionable people not object in their hearts to seeing their names and doings chronicled, but they send the matter to the newspaper office themselves. Hardly a mail fails to bring statements that a wedding will take place at such an hour in such a church; that this lady has returned from Europe by such a steamship; that this one and her husband will sail ; that a reception '(which “please notice") is to occur at such a number in Fifth avenue at the time named; that “enclosed ia an invita tion to a wedding to takeplaoe in Roches ter, which please 6eud to your special correspondent there.” (This comes from the “best man.”) The description of the dress of a bride who was married in Grace Church not long ago appeared in a leading newspa per. She had written it herself. In fact, she revised the entire account of the wedding, as she happened to know a man on the paper who obtained for her the copy at an early hour in the day. Her father had often said that all news paper men were good for was to be kicked. A reporter called one evening to see the husband of a leader in New York society about an addition to a li brary in which the family had long been interested and which is certainly a legiti mate subject of inquiry. The gentle man was out. The servant, however, with a knowing air suggested that the lady of the house might be able to give the desired information. Down stairs came the lady, smiling graciously, still in her wrapper. The reporter told bis errand. “Oh dear!” exclaimed the lady in a most disappointed voice, “I thought you br.d come to report my ball.” Capturing Wild Horses. A largo mob of wild horses is descried coming toward the riders over a distarit rise. As they draw near and see them selves headed by mounted men, thev wheel sharply on one side, and, with manes and tuils streaming in the wind, and their Hanks shining with moisture, they gallop off in another direction, but only to find enemies wherever they turn. At last, in desperation, they make straight for the widest gap thev see in the circle. The two men between whom they hope to escape leap off their hack horses, which they quickly hobble and leave loose, and, mounting barebacked on tlio spare one, wait for the right mo ment for closing in on the flying and al ready distressed baguales as they make their Anal rush. If tlioy do so too soon, of course the mob swerves to one side, and passes behind the hunter; but, if they manage well, the two simultaneously close in on the drove, bol'eadoras in hand, ready to cast; and at the moment the horses pass each singles out a good look ing - colt, whirls the balls round his head, and, letting fly, entangles them round both hind legs so effectually that the vic tim, after struggling onward some fifty yards, is obliged to submit, and falls heavily over. After the first cast the hunter presses on close to the heels of the escaping mob, and, loosening his second pair from round his waist, often sr-cures another colt. Then he dismounts, and, after tying the prostrate animal’s fore hoofs close together with some of the many rawhide thongs about his per son or his horse, he leaves it, struggling but secure, and resumes his place in the circle as before, in case there im more game still within it. And hero let me give a brief description of the boleadoras. for it is these that are chiefly used—and not the lasso, as is commonly supposed— for catching the wild horses of the Pampn. Three double-twisted thongs of raw- horse-hide, each about three feet six inches loug, are softened by rubbing and working them in the hands, and when in a pliant state, are tied together at one end. At the other end of one is fastened a stone ball, covered with hide, and shaped so as to fit the grasp of the hands; and to the other two ends are bound wooden balls (of the size of a small croquet one), also cased in hide. Grasping firmly the stone one, the hunter whirls the others around his head, and, when the right moment has arrived, he lets go (as a boy does half his sling), and the three balls twist the thongs around whatever they are thrown at. But to resume. After nil the baguales inclosed have escaped or been oaught, we look after the ostriches, which have, as a rule, remained, hiding thems“lves about the middle of the cir cle. Any who mav have singly tried to run off previously lhave been allowed to do so; bnt if a troop should have made a rush (during the horse hunt), three or four of the men pursue and generally bag one apiece. Many others will drop into the low grass, hoping not to be seer,, but the corredores are too keeu-sighted and experienced, and, galloping up and down, tliev beat thegrujnd like spaniels, shouting and Whistling, until the birds are flushed, one by one. and have to run for it. On these expeditions any deer and guauacos (a species of llama) are not hunted; only so when neither bagu ales nor ostriches have been inclosed.— London Field. The coronation of the Czar Nicholas cost 0,000,000 rubles, and that of Ales* Meier ll 11,mm mbltt.