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THE FffiST SUIT. A little nld pairof pnnts, (food tack! Embroidered til running vinos; With buttons of brass botli front and back To match the trou-ors a tiny sack, All buttons ami fancy lines. A little white shirt with tucks and lace That wont with the trousers, too— I laughed till the tears ran down my lace To think of me in so small a space, And how like a gourd 1 grew. It flsaicarly twenty years ago That I wore tills tiaby suit. So long that to day I do not know II pride in my childish face did show As I touched the silk worked fruit. Nearly—ah me! all of twenty years! And It makes uie ice I so sail, That truly my eyes arc filled with tears At thought of trials and hopes itnd fours Which came to that little lad. Poor little fellow! 1 wish that lie •Might have known what he knows to-day I lint, dear little boy, he eonldn't see That ever a cloud on high might ho— Perhaps ’twas ihe better way For none could tell if iho years to come Would saddened or Joyful he, Nor whether Ills weary feet would mam From the good and true he learned at, homo, And so it seems good to me. For the bat/ of him died out one day, A man grew up In the place, Avery good men 1 dare not say, The boy was better—so fold away The clothes with their rutiled lace. At thought of the trials and hopes and fears Oh, I feel. Indeed, full sad, And truly my eyes are filled with tears, When I think a ‘-‘•ore of thrifty years isgone with the little lad. —James Herry linnet, in Hvslon Transcript. The Masher. What is a masberP Webster gives no definition ( him, hut lio is known to modern literature as a creation indige nous to American soil, and which prows profusely on the steps of hotels, of t lie intersection of streets and around thea ter entrances, or at sucli parts of Ihe promenade as are most frequented by young ladies without (•‘■corks; lie lias, unfortunately, the outward sombianco of a gentleman, notwithstanding his grimaces and contortions when one of the opposite sex happens to notice him. He Is always airing his accomplishments, hoping to “mash” some silly girl. When one of those interesting subjects appears the masher writhes and twists like a subtle anaconda, whom he resem bles, indeed, and is at once alUiciod with a facial difficulty; his features work convulsively, one eye is partially closed ; a smile Intended to be an inspiration of love, but which in iks idiotic vacancy more nearly resembles a suggestion of colic, wreathes his bland features, ami he makes mysterious passes over his ebiri and moustache, his impudent lips, and finally with an indescribable twist of his ringed fingors, he puts the hand kerchief away in his breast pocket; ho •ias been indulging in a species of hand kerchief literature a sign language which variously interpreted means, “I would like to be acquainted,” “wo will meet again,” ”1 admire you,” ‘‘follow me,” and similai trash. To a sensible, level-headed girl his maneuvers are so absurd that she can hardly repress a laugh, but should the masher discern even the ghost of a smile, lie would fol low her to her own doorsill. So intense is his egotism that it never occurs to him t hat he is being laughed at. A lady in this city was once followed by one of the species for several blocks, and at last site turned upon hiru ami asked : “ Have you any business with mo, sirP" “ I wish to make your acquaintance,” lio replied, with the impudent self-pos ►““slon the creature has at immediate Ultnmand. The lady was disconcerted for a mo ment, by his boldness, then she said : ■ 1 can not imngine what 1 have dono that yon should daro to address me in this manner!” ‘•Why, you have given mo every sign,” answered tho wretch, pointing to tho handkerchief she carried openly in her hand ; ‘‘and I supposed you wanted to know me!" To this day the lady does not know tho sign language referred to, but she never carries her handkereh of on the street. Another and bolder met hod employed Is the conversation card, ll is eminently innocent and proper in its language, and was originated as a source of amusement at evening parties. It is printed on colored oara-lioard, generally in lino lettering, and tho text is usually some simple request or question, as fol lows : •‘ 1 have often seen and admired you. Would it bo agreeable to moot, if so, when and where? The blank spaces on the eard may bo tilled in with the an swer. The whole business is clandes tine, and the single card in the posses sion of tho writer of this article was found in the pages of a book from the public library, where it had been placed and inadvertently forgotten. There are differences in mash ers, but tho lino begins with a fool and ends with a villain. —Detroit Post awl Tribune. At the Old Price Stlil, " Mr. Thompson,” she began as lie was about to pass out, “you have boarded with me for the past six years.” “ Remained with you—yes.” “ And now it is with a feeling of gen uine sorrow that I force myself to in form you that, owing to the high price of ” “Certainly, madam. Owing to tho high price of strawberries you must change to dried apples. Very well, madam, firing on your apple-sass.” “ Mr. Thompson, owing to the high price of beef, I ” " You must change from mutton to codfish; very **cii, Mo*, (smith, you *jave my consent.” “Mr.'Thomson, beef Is so very dear that 1 must ” “Certainly, 1 see; we have had beef twice or throe times during the last, year, but owing so the price you must change to spring iamb, very well, Mr*. Smith, don’t put over six of ’em on my plate at dinner, as I am not feeling first-rate lust now!”—IP all Street Daily News. There are 5.97 churches in Phila delphia a figure wiii-h entitles tlmt town to be called “the city of churches ” in contradistinction to Brooklyn, and the os-essed valuation of this property, according to ti e official report just published, is $17,000,000. The largest valuation is that of the Homan Catholic Cathedral ($285,000), anil the next largest the Jewish Syna gogue on Broad street (9220,000). These figntes, of course, represent only a jm?! rentage of the actual rallies, but they indicate that religion in its vari ous forms is not an unknown quantity in the city of brotherly love. X. T. Time*. —The tug-boat Troy towed a couple of sailing vessels up the Hudson River the other day, of which one was an old •loop and the other anew schooner. There was nothing strange in this ex cept that the sloop was named Abra ham Lincoln and the schooner James A. Garfield, which was certainly a singular coincidence. PERSONAL AND LITERARY. I j —President Arthur ha* recently been honored with the degree of LL. 1). by Union College, at Schenectady, N. Y. —Student, fresh from college, to eon- I ductor: “ 1 wish to get on the penulti i mate car.” Conductor: ‘‘We nave no ! peanut car; you can take the smoker.” —Captain Frederic Howes, well i known in the commercial world for the i application of double topsail yards to shipping, which lias given the inven tion the name of “Howe's rig,” died l suddenly of heart disease at Yarmouth | port. Mass., a few days ago. Ho also I invented the mode now in general use i of slinging lower yards. —Mr. Ttilanc, who recently gave $2.- 000,000 for the foundation of a Univer sity in New Orleans, is a Northern man, who rode into the Crescent. City more than half a century ago in search of a modest business opening. He found what he was looking for, and retired with a fortune soon after the late Civil War began. —Uhicago Tribune;. Mrs. Ann S. Stephens, author of “ Fashion and Famine,” “ The Desert ed Wife,” “Mary Derwent,’’ the ‘‘Golden Prick,” and other novels which were marked pecuniary as well as literary successes in their day, hilt are well-nigh forgotten now, is loading a retired life of elegant leisure in Fifty sixth street, New York. N. Herald. An oration to which Daniel Web ster referred in It's autobiography, which was delivered -fitly 4, IKO2, in Fryeburg, Me., was recently discovered in a mass of the author’s private papers which had found their way into a junk shop of Boston. At that time Mr. Webster was Principal of Fryeburg Academy, and was only twenty years of age. ' N. V. Hunt. Mrs. Frank Leslie has been quite ill, because of close attention to her ex tensive business, but is now better. It is a curious feature in Mrs. Leslie’s his tory that she owes her present, distinc tion to the death of two husbands. When the first, the late E. <l. Squier, died, slic was led by necessity to write for the papers which he formerly edited, and by the death of the latter she be came their sole proprietor. She lives in handsome stylo on Fifth avenue, New York. .V. Y. (Iraphir. Mr. <M. Raymond, who was married recently to Annie Louise Cary, is a wealthy, well-known New York broker. He came to New York from Norwalk, Conn., where his family re side. For some years he was senior member of the linn of Raymond & Saxon, brokers, and subsequently of the firm of Raymond, Saxon *Y Rogers. He was one of the founders of tiie Slock Exchange. It is said by the friends of Mr. Raymond that lie and Miss ('ary hud been engaged for years; in fact; since lier girlhood. Mr. Raymond was a bachelor, is of middle age, and a load ing member of the Manhattan Club. - - ,Y. I . Times. The Exploits or a Pet lien. < )iio of our Marion County lady friends iiat! a pet hen which felt quite at homo anywhere in the house. Quarterly meeting was close at hand ami the preacher was coming; eggs were scarce, and only a few dozen could lie had. 'The lady was flying atound in a great hurry getting ready to cook up the cake and other nice things, while tho hen was poking around in the house hunt ing for a suitable place to make herself a nest; liu hscided that the wash-bowl, sitting on the water-shelf, was t.h very place, but before she eoulfl he suitably nestled fhe howl fell to tin* floor and broke into a thousand pieces. This vexed on. lady friend a little, but she kept her temper like a Christian, and went on about her work. It wasn’t long before the hen bad tumbled from tin"table to the floor a whole sot of plates. This would have been a sore trial lo patient old Job, but the lady went on with her work, humming “Sweet-by-nnd-by,” to keep up her spirits. Now the now spring hat sat on the editor table in one of tho rooms, where some of the lady neighbors who bad dropped in to soe it ban left it, and it was on tho bandbox the lady had in her hurry set a pan with five, dozen eggs (nil that she had to make cakes tor the preachers) and hurried into (lie store-room. The pet lien came piroute iug around in the room, anil right into the pan of eggs she nestled, and, of course, the bandbox, pan and eggs all tumbled >o the floor. There was a gen eral mixture—that is, the eggs and the hat became one and the same. When the lady, attracted by the noise, got to the door and saw the condition of things, she was mad, good mad, very mad Sl.e could afford for tho wash-bowl and new plates to be broken, but for all the eggs she had to go into the cake to lie broken, and the hat ever lastingly ruined, was too much for her Christian resignation, mid, in the lan guage of "Unde” Steve Pearson, when the hog turned over his sirup, she wanted to turn ove - the house. The lady weighs considerably over a hun dred, and the day was warm, but she ran that lien down, and mentally vowed that the preachers should eat her. For safe-keeping the hen was put in a strong coop. In tin hour the hen was found in the wood-box, setting in the corner of the room, and there were found two eggs. This is a fact, and he who doubts it must consult our lighting editor.— Marion County (Ou.J Argus. The “Masher.” “ Is he a rare bb-.l?” lie is that. The species used to bo v plenty that every city had them by the score; but of late years the Fool- Killer has got in his work sowell that (. |y about a dozen Mashers can now bo .Kind in the whole United States.” •' 11c has a sweet look." "Certainly; he h:v stood before the glass for hours to practi ee on that look. When he parts his hair in the center, waves his little mustache and takes his dear littlo cane in hand for a walk oil the street, lie calculates that sweet look will knock down every second lady lie meets." •• His plumage is very tine." “Oh, yes. The Masher always gets the best.beoauae he beats his tailor and leaves his washwoman to .sing for her mouey." ■•ls he a valuable bird?" “ His carea-s is valued at from two to fiv e cents per pound, according to the price of soap." •* Then the species will soon become extinct P" “ Yes; in a few short years the Math er will be known on earth no more. The Smithsonian Institute and two or three medical colleges will have specimens preserved in alcohol and skeletons on exhibition, and old gray-headed men have a dim recollection of having onco seen the animal promenading the earth" — lktroit Fret Press. If an untruth is only a dav old it is called a lie ; if it is a year old it is called a falsehood ; bnt if it'is a century old it is called a legend. Relative Yalue of Large and Small Cow*. Experiments to settle this question have not been made in such manner as to bring conviction to the minds of fann ers generally, which it is best to keep for dairy purposes, large or small cows. It should not be lost sight of, that tho settlement of this question depends largely upon whether the cows on the farm are kept strictly for dairy purposes or not. If so kept, then the calves are presumed to he raised, if preserved at" all, for use in the dairy, and not, as on the ordinary stock farm, mainly for future beef purposes. If it is the purpose to keep a set of cows during their entire period of use fulness at the pail, say from the age of two to twelve years, then the important point to he settled is, whether the cost of maintaining, say 400 pounds weight in the large cow. over and above w hat the light weight dairy cow is supposed to show on tiie scales, during the ten years she is doing duty at the pail, will over balance the gain in beef production, shown by the large cow at the end of her service in the dairy. The presump tion is that the dairyman is capable of breeding or buying cows of moderate size that will yield as much milk during the year as can lie obtained from the cow that will, in fair llesh, weigh 1,100 or 1,200 pounds. It is said to require about two pounds of nutritious food a day to sustain each hundred pounds weight of the live ani mal. In other words, it will require eight pounds daily to maintain a cow of 1,200 pounds, over and above that re quired to keep a cow of 800 pounds weight. This amounts to 2,900 pounds, ill round numbers, for the year. In any kind of nutritious food, ns good timothy hay, oats, corn or mill feed, tho cost of maintaining the 400 pounds referred to. for the year, would be rather over than under ten dollars. Now, the amount would, during the useful life ofthe cow, amount to from SBO to SIOO a sum, as will be readily seen, considerably larg er than the entire carcass of the cow is likely to he worth, if sold to the butcher. But this estimate cuts no figure in ex cluding the largo well-bred cow from the average farm; for, on any but the strictly dairy farm, the cow’s usefulness comes largely from the valuable increase she gives from year to year, giving a good account of herself in the mean time, at the pail. The time was when wo looked to the farm, as this term is generally understood, for all our butter and cheese; and while important inno vations have been made upon old-time practices, we must not allow the farm proper, or any industry upon it, to ho overwhelmed by changes from any source. It is right to pattern after I ho cream ery, because perfection in methods, brought out on the creamery and dairy farm, iiave revolutionized the quality of our butter; and what the farm proper requires is not the 700 or WOO pounds cow, to be used for milk and butter purposes alone, but the 1,100 or 1,200 pounds cow, so bred as to make her progeny worth far more lo rear than 10 kill, or sell to the butcher at live or six weeks old. Thus, with stock of good size and fairly well-bred, rating as high grades, the disparity in cost of keep during the natural, useful lifeof the cow, between the large and the small boast, will not make theshowingon tho balance sheet that some suppose. Tho question comes up, too, where else we are to look for our high-grade steers but to such darns as wo have de- BcriWsU. The rough, plains cattle will, 11 is true, supply norm* steers, anti the ffemand for that, grade of meat is not (likely to fall off, as cheap grades are .Njioieil by those who cannot afford to bir" better, and the large demands for packing and canning purposes an- nw |y to continue indefinitely. But tho high grade cow is needed to furnish our export steers as well as our best beef cattle, no matter where consumed. So. while she. may, in a degree, be ignored upon the dairy farm proper, she will, for the reasons given above, be one of the leading features upon the farm while mankind continue to eat beef, butter and cheese. —National Livestock Journal. Rhyming Table of I’rcsldeuts. 1 noticed a wdW or two ago, in your interesting column of communications, an inquiry concerning a rhyming list of the Presidents of the United States. I had a recollection of having clipped several suoh lists from papers, and looked them up. The tersest, and there fore the easiest ami most useful for memorizing, is tho inclosed, which your correspondent “Hudson” may like to see; The American Presidential line lit’kiuM in seventeen eighty-nine. Bv Washington \nw tho list begun, Who ruled two term*, then Adams one; JefTertton, Mndiaon. Monroe. Sat for two terms each; ami so John Quincy Adams came for one, While Jackson through two terms did run; Harrison died and left four years For Tyler; one term Polk appears; When Taylor died ami left three years For Fillmore; one term next for I’ioroe And for Buchanan; Lincoln then Was shot as his second term began, And Johnson sat until enme Grant For two terms; Hayes for one; and scant Four months for Garfield, who was killed, And Arthur the vacant office filled —N. F. Mail. Hop Statistics. New York State has 9,765 growers of hops, who cultivate 39,<>79 acres in tho crop, with a product in 1879 of 21,628,- 931 pounds. Next comes Wisconsin with 2,817 growers, 4,438 acres in the crop, and a product of 1,966,427 pounds; then California, with 89 growers, 1,119 acres, and 1,444,077 pounds production; Washington Territory, with .Vigrowers, 534 acres in hops, and a crop of 703,- 277 pounds; Michigan, 438 growers, 400 acres in the. crop, and a product of 2t!t>,loo pounds; Oregon. 70 growers, 304 acres in the crop, and 244,371 pounds product. Of the New England States Vermont takes the lead, with 214 growers of hops, 265 acres under tho crop, nnd a yield of 109,350 pounds; Maine comes next, with 141 growers, 219 acres in hops, and a crop of 48,211 pounds; then New Hampshire, with 54 growers, cultivating sfi acres, and securing 23,955 pounds; and Massa | elmsetts, with 82 growers, 23 acres in hops, and a yield of 9,895 pounds. Only eighteen States raise hops for the mar ket, and of these, five raise loss than 10,000 pounds each.— if. Y. Tim's. Diameter of Cyclones. Cyclones extend over a circle from 100 to MM) miles In diameter, and sometimes 1,000 miles. In the West Indies they are sometimes as small as 100 miles in diameter, but on reaching the Atlantic t hay dilate to 600 or 1,000 miles. Some times, on the contrary, they contract in their progress; and. while contracting, they augment fearfully in violence. The violence of the wind increases from the margin to the center, where the atmos phere is frequently quite calm. - No President of the United State* has over left the country, even tempora rily, during his term of office. A Ship Brake, . An apparatus has ben the introduction of whim, it's claimed, will prevent any further availing dis asters caused by the/ollisli of vessels in rivers, channels, And atioa. The constructioi of t* device is very simple anil gmsists r a pair of iron shutters or “fins,” tyged one on each side of tho stfrn post of a vessel and shutting close to its siYs from the stern post forward. The “fins” are kept tightly closed by a sitiple appara tus on deck, which is contacted with the pilot house, and whei “let go” the slays connected with the “iins” allow them to open at rightangles with the ship, bringing it at to” a stand still, and holding it Wt as if anchored. 'The area of the “ins” is in direct ratio with the size o the drip, and the immediate stoppage if the vessel when they are suddenly opned s a certainty. “ F’ins ” much largeithan are needed may be fitted to a] vessels without looking out of propotion io the size of the ship. lor exanjle, a vessel re quiring lins with ampetficial area of 100 square feet to stoj it eould be sup plied with fins of an ,irea of 500 feet, and they would not ttok large or dis proportionate to thetship. When the fins are released theexperiment proves that no jarring oi stuck is experienced, such as is felt on a railroad when the brakes are applied. The water being a yielding body, aels vs a spring or cush ion. lor foggy voither or darkness a self-acting guard it rigged out at tho bow of the vessel, aid should it meet with any rigid body .n the path of the ship when touched, it at once releases ilie “tins” and stops flit vessel before it can reach the obstruction, without any movement or direction on the part of the pilot or navigatihg officer. When closed the iins follow Ye outline of tho ship, and, being ilusli with its sides, can in no way diminishlits speed. The inventor’s first experiment was made with a 97 j foot fast ream yacht, to which was attached a pair of “ fins ” 4 feet long by 2J feet Fidel This power proved to be at least twice as much as was needed to stop tie Vessel instantly when at full speed. A second trial demonstrated this fact when only oue fin was used. The space traveled after the brake was applied was so small that it could not be disjoined by persons watching the experinent from the shore. To ascertain what sited fins would be required to stop a cert,an steamship of fourteen hundred tons measurement a a raft or float was constructed to carry a pair of tins in potv.Yim without fixing them to a vessel. The Hoat and tins were towed out by a powerful tugboat, being attached thereto by anew six inch tnanila hawser. When the tug boat was going at full speed with full steam on the tins were released and tho effect was to snap tlw hawser like a piece of thread, making a report like a cannon. The fins remained firm. The breaking strain of a flx-itteh hawser is said to be twenty-seven thousand pounds. The lins used on this occasion were each 9xß feet, or together an area of 144 square feet. When they ivero tried with the fourteen hundred-ton vessel they proved abundantly large, stopping the ship instantly and holding her fast against her power within a less distance than live feet In the opinion of the inventor a col lision like that of the Stonington and Narragansett could have been averted if the steamers had been provided with *l.O k.-n. i. The Stonington—the col “? vessel—had several minutes in which to stop i Tip* same number of seconds W...0U i,.„_ sufficient will. the brake to bnn* a s iaYi<l3‘lT Another case in pfij/^K —-a—— <-* Btn.ruship Bollix 0. which was wrecked on the southern point of Miz zen Head by collision with rocks. Out of fifty-seven persons on board thirly-livc perished, including the officers. Om of the survivors soiled in evidenc ti-a he was on the lookout an 1 gat e warn ing of “breakers ahead” ten minutes before the steamer struck. —N. >'. Herald. Mr. Mnckle. Tho other night Captain Mucklo went home intoxicated. After going to bed, he made so many strhnge noises that Mrs. Mnckle became alarmed. Mnckle told her that he must have been att ek ed by brain fever. Tho poor woman became so badly frightened, that after Mucklo sank into a muttering sleep, she made a mustard plaster and pul i on the back of his neck. Mucklo finally became quiet and Mucklo sank to sleep, leaving the pl.iXtm on hur hus band’s neck. During the night the plas ter was displaced, but when Mucklo awoke next morning his neck was so sore ho could scarcely turn his head. Mrs. Mucklo, ashamed of what she had done, was determined not to say any thing about the plaster, and fearful that her husband would mention tho unskillfully attonded application, she sat at tho breakfast table with downcast expression. “This place on my neck hurts like the deuce,” said Muc|le. “Now I’ll catch it.” thought his wifo, but Muckle continued. “Strangest thing in the world how this thing happened. I was standing on the corner of the street yesterday after noon, talking to a gentleman on busi ness, when along came a lumber wagon loaded with lumber. A long board, which I did not happen to notice, stuck out about ten feet benirni, and while l was deeply intor*stcdv%Ke wagon turned theoorner, and the lung board enmo around and scraped the back of my neck. I hope the time will como when the people of Little Rock will arise and denounce suoh nuisances.” Muckle is a terrible liar, and his wife Is losing confidence in him. —Ark insaw 2Y aveler. How They (let the Best of l’s. Johnnie went out and “lostcd" him self yesterday. He wag missing for two whole hours and the. neighbors were a'! aroused to see if the), had seen the stray young vagabond, wheeling a little red wheelbarrow off with him. After a long and tedious search he was found in the back-yard of anew chum, mount ed in triumph on the roof of a hencoop. Didn't he “catch it." Well, no, not hardly. It was this wav. When his mother started out for him she determined that found ho would get such a spanking as would cure him of his nomadic tendencies, but as she looked and looked, and began to grow anxious, she ‘ mgUoqreit" toward the little scamp, andqv' the time she found him, his face browned and heat ed with the sun, his hands begrimed with dirt, his apron tore, and a new hole stubbed in his shoe, she was so glad to see him that she picked him up iind kissed him. “He was only a little ways off, that's all.” Slid she. as she gave him a second plat* at pudding at dinner for being “such * Mice little run away." Oh, these little ones get the best'of us every time. —Xtw Haven Reg ister. A Universal German Cosom- This trinkgeld business preva - every- | whet e and under all cireumstaices. I have frequently seen passenger in the street cars give the conductor i little remembrance when he collected their fan’s, and they did not expect an tiling in return for it, either. Nor was the money bestowed in a benevolent spirit, for the donor always sank back ia his seat with a self-satisfied expression,and received the touch of the conductor’s ; cap and his murmured thanks in a man- I ner that gave one an unpleasant sng- j gestion of patronizing. Nor can tiie bestower of trinkgeld under such cir cumstances refrain from stealing a hur ried and almost supercilious glance around the car at the other passengers to see if they have observed his liberal ity and appreciate it. 1 have been told —though t have had no personal ex perience—that it is customary to give the ushers in the churches a couple of cents, or so, when they show you to your seat. It reminds one of the “mon ey-changers in the temple.” A German is brought up with the sound of Irink gdd always ringing i n Vis ears. He secs it on all sides; “everr g a |o that sweeps from the North briigs to his ears the clink of resounding pftnnin'> , s.” He is not to be blamed, then, if , e Yj V es way to the national custom ant-rq Ves anil expects to receive it under any -in and all circumstances. But, at the si 10 time, it is mighty aggravating to American who is used to treating serv ants as if they were, at least, something a little better than slaves to whom one tosses a few pennies in a spirit of pity. Even after one has gotten the run of the waiters, and is perfectly certain that each and every one of them, even if lie i is an unfortunate nobleman, will take a few pfennings and return due measure of bows and scrapes for the same, one has yet several little tricks to learn, and must pass through several other similar experiences. He must learn that each and every man who has anything to do with the public in any underling capac ity is always ready to take a small sum of money, be he ever so distinguished looking and clad in the brightest of uni forms. One must not allow himself to be caught in the way Chicago and I were when ’.vc were green in the trinkgvld business. We went out to the tomb of 1 the Emperor’s father and mother one day and were directed to enter by a very intelligent, distinguished-looking man, dressed in a very impressive uni form. We went in and looked at the really beautiful effigies of the King and Queen, and, miller the intlucuce or ilic soft, mellow light streaming in through the beautiful colored-glass windows, and the. natural solemnity of such a place, we unconsciously fell into that frame of mind in which one always is ready to judge his worst enemy rather leniently, anifto ascribe to him some good mo tives. In this state of mind we debated in whispers tho probability of the dis tinguished-looking attendant expecting a lee. And it was unanimously agreed that he did not look like a man who would receive an offer of this kind in the right spirit. So we concluded to simply thank thegentlemanandnot run tho risk of offering an insult and trink yeldat one and tho same time. We passed out, simply saying: “ Dnnkc Ilmen," as we passed tho distinguished ono. But that individual followed us out and, with a. touch to his distin guished-looking cap, said in that dis tinguished-sounding voice of liis: “The gentlemen have forgotten the attend ant.” There was nothing left us to do but to apologize an.l give him a couple SdrfififttS pud receive in yeturn ilio u>y.s■ guished-looking man. And I don’t know but what the investment was a good one. Ono cannot get bows and scrapes half as cheaply in America. If 1 had the money to spare I think 1 would rv and hire that man by the month to puff’me up a little with self-esteem—l n nv of no surer means to that end ;hr n the bow sand scrapes of a distin guished-looking man. — Berlin Cor. San 'Francisco Chronicle. Sails Surpassing Steam. About the year 1344 began tho most important era iu tho history of Ameri can ship-building. Our Liverpool packets had already demonstrated the capabilities of our builders and mar iners. The Canada, for example, un der the command of Captain Seth G. Macy, made her trips almost with tho regularity of a steamer. Fourteen to sixteen days was the average length of her voyages between the two ports. This mav have been an extreme case, but the fact remains that these “linors” made a remarkable record. * * * With out mooting the question about the respective merits of the noted Aberdeen dippers and the American ships which, during a period of perhaps fifteen years, circled the globe with their vast expanse of canvas, it is not too strong a .statement to say that some of the runs made by our ships at that time have never been surpassed by either sail or steam. The great builder of packets, Laae Webb, died in 1843. Donald McKay, a native of Nova Scotia, who removed-in youth to Newburyport and made a name there and in Boston, began, at the same time, to win a world-wido reputa tion for clipper ships of a size and speed hitherto unexampled. Many competi tors appeared at the same titno. The ship James Baines , built by McKay, ran 420 miles in twenty-four hours. " The ship Red Jacket, built at Roekland, Maine, ran 2,280 miles in seven days, or 325 miles per diem for a week. The Flying Cloud, McKay’s most celebrated ship, once made 374 knots, or 433 miles, in twenty-four hours and twenty-fivo minutes, equal to 17.17 miles an hour. To appreciate these distances, compare them with the greatest distance ever made in twenty-four hours by a Liver pool steamer, the new and now cele brated Alaska, in the fastest westward passage yet accomplished from Liver pool to New York. Her greatest run was 419 miles in twenty-four hours. This proves what all sailors know, but of which few landsmen are aware—that, with a strong and steady favoring wind, it is possible for a sailing-ship to equal tlie speed of an Atlantic steamship.— The Century. —A railroad company bought some land adjoining its track at Meriden, Conn., and the seller agreed to remove a house, barn and shed within a speci fied time. He failed to do so. Cables were then fastened round the buildings and attached to locomotives, and in that way the structures were speedily dragged off. —Dr. Claxton. says the Philadelphia Record, has found that rabbits soon die from an injection of human saliva, and that the saliva of sonic races, notably of negroes and residents of the tropics, exhibits an extreme degree of viru lence. a virulence that bears relation to the amount of tobacco usr~d by the indi vidual The Sue* Canal. \Ylien Napoleon sent his engineers to tiX i [n> levels across the Isthmus of SuX in or ler to determine the practica bility of digging a canal through the stint for commercial purposes, they ma<i.A out that the surface of the Gulf of Suez W as thirty feet higher than the ! Mediterranean, and so the protect was for the time given up. The blunder in | the survey was not discovered until I 1810, when new schemes began to be I agitated for cutting a ship channel that 1 would shorten tlm voyage from Europe ! to ludia an<l the East by almost the en -1 tire distance around the continent of Af l -ica - i AHlUt* In 1854 M. He Le sep< formed a canal company and obtaii od agrant from the i Viceroy of Egypt for ninety-nine years. Tho scheme wus looked upon with sus picion by British engineers and British capitalists, and the inception and prose cution of the enterprise were largely due to the French. In 1859 tho work was begun, and ten years later the lied Sea and the Mediterranean met in tiie Hitler Lakes. The total length of the canal is not far from 100 miles, about seventy-five miles of the course being formed by excavation and twenty live ’"miles lying through the shallow lakes of the isthmus, which, in many ui ioini‘*“' places, required deepening. The ordi nary width of the canal is <123 feet at tiie surface and seventy-two feet at the bot tom, tlie depth of the water being twenty-six feet There are no locks (throughout its course, and its termini xe Suez, at the entrance to the Gulf of “Sc on the south, from which point thin.- ,e ra i| roa( js to Cairo and Alex ?i v-id a “fresh-water canal” to TV 1 , >ud Port Said at the margin of the Me.l.lK ,he north. Tho building otX artificial harbor at each terminus, witX !|{J necessary protec ions, was reckC. eate J r under tliki ng than the exty of the canal itselt. \ Ihe work was formV ed on the lit. or November 18$‘,, ndon tllo 2oth i was publicly annov a that Lord Bi aeoiisheld had f rom Ismail l’asha, who had become v. t , rov of Egypt under the title of Kheu vfc , 170,602 out of the 400,000 shares of each. The sum paid was £4,080,000, and the commissions to the Rothschilds and oilier expenses of the transaction amounted to about £IOO,OOO more. By the terms of transfer the Government receives interest at live pier cent, on the shares till the year 1894, after which it is to receive the full dividends. There are three members of the Board of Di rectors representing mr luccrcsi oi mcr British Government, one of whom is a resident director in Paris, where he has hitherto acted in perfect accord with tho French majority in the directory. The following table, compiled by the New York World , shows the enormous traffic lliat has passed through the canal and paid tolls since it was opened: Year. Vessels. Tonnai/e. Receipts. IS7J 181 4 3),i1l 1 $1,031,865 l-syi 765 781,467 1, *08,746 J 872 1,683 1,430.160 3,231,518 1873 1113 2.0‘5,072 4.570,46: 1874 1,251 2. 138,673 3.071,877 1875 1,494 2,940,708 8,777,260 1876 1,457 3,0:2,107 5.095,000 1877 1.663 3,418,010 6,334,889 1878 1,513 3,291,515 6,219,646 1870 1.477 3,216.012 5,937,213 18'0 2,i 2 i 4,344,319 6,068.00) 1881 2,727 5,704,601 10,351,80'J In 1870 England furnished 64 per cent, of the tonnage which sought that channel; in 1871, 65; in 1872, 70; in 1873, 69; in 1874 and in 1875, 71; in 1876, 73; in 1877, 78; in 1878, 79: in 1879, 77: in 1880, 79; and last year 82 per cent, or more than four-lifths of tho wIqgUvHPWHiA,,, w ........ .....f,, England does not own a controlling in terest in the corporation, she is never theless under superior obligation to keep the canal open to commerce. When the Russo-Turkisn war broke out in 1877 there were fears lest Russia, taking ad vantage of the fact that the canal was in the territory of a Turkish dependen cy, might seize or blockade it, but En gland Tost no time in declaring that the canal should be neutral, and in pointing out the fact that its unobstructed navi fation was essential to every Slate in iurope. That necessity still exists, and upon Great Britain, as the power that can least afford to have the highway to India closed, falls the burden of re straining Arabi Faslia and his army to such an extent that they shall not have the ability to interfere with the canal.— Detroit Host and Tribune. Gen. Harney in a Hurry. The following comical story is told of General Harney, when he was in com mand at Camp Verde, Texas. He was an intensely dignified otlieor, and if there was one thing he detested more than another it was undignified haste. One evening, just ns he was about to hold dress parade, he perceived that ho had forgotten his handkerchief, and as the weather was very hot, he said to his orderly: “Go to my quarters quick, and bring my handkerchief.” Tho orderly touched his cap and started for the quarters, several hundred yards dis tant. After he had proceeded a short distance, remembering that there was no time to lose, he broke into a trot. “ See that scoundrel running as if the Indians were after him ff there is any thingl hate it is to seo ft soldierruunitig, instoad of marching properly. Here, my man,” continued Harney to another soldier, “go after that man and tell him I say to walk.” The second soldier started after tne first, blit as the first ono kept on running, 1 lie second one saw his only chance to deliver the message was to hurry up, so he, too, broke into a run. To say that Harney swore is to use but a mild ex pression. “ Here, Sergeant, go after that man and tell him if he don’t stop running I’ll hang him up by the thumbs.” The Sergeant started out in a brisk walk, hut as his predecessor had a good start, he, too, began to run as hard as he could. “ If all three of the scoundrels ain’t running like jack rabbits!” ejaculatod Harney. “I’ll show ’om,” and tucking his sword under his arm, he started in pursuit as fast as he could run, but sud denly remembering his dignity he came to a halt, and walked stifly and slowly back to where the dress parado was to come off.— Texas Siftings. —An Austin Sunday-school teacher was examining liis class as to their bib lical knowledge. Who was it that be trayed his master? First boy—•• Abr aham betrayed his master.” “That’s not right. Next.” Second boy—“lt was Judas Iscariot who betrayed his master.” “ That was right.” A good iittic boy looked reproachfully at the teacher and said; ‘I am going to tell rov ma you say it was right for .Jit las to let ray his master. Tc.j /ls Mfliurje —Charles Antobces, the most noted of the frontiersmen of Colorado, died a few days ago, at the age of eighty years, at liis homo near Fort Raymond. He piloted John C. Fremont back and forth over the range. FOREIGN GOSSIP. —Murderers in France are frequently compelled, in addition to death or the gallys, to pay a heavy compensation ia money, when they have it, to their vic tim’s family. —The prices given for horses in lln land in the last century were fully as high as now. In 1793 three hunters brought in the aggregate $5,250; throe more, $6,000, and $5,000 was refused by Whitebread, the brewer, for an other. —lf a Turk meets any of his wives lq a walk through the bazaars it is not etiquette for him to notice them, al though they may be throwing away his money right and left. He can only stroke his beard and say “inshallah!” (please God), or “Allan kerim!” (God is merciful). —An English lady who sued for dam ages because of a fall when boarding a steamboat has just lost her case. The jury decided that her high-heeled boots hail wontonly and willfully contributed to cause tho injury of which she complained. • —The danger of a sudden revulsion of feeling was fearfully exemplified a few days since in London in the case of Major Savory, the Chairman of the Committee of tho Naval anil Military Club. This officer had drawn Shotover in Hie £SOO sweepstakes, and was so ex cited on hearing the news of the mare’s victory in the Derby that shortly after ward he had an apoplectic fit, and soor. died. Two members of the ancient gypsy tribes of the Coopers and Taylors were married with Protestant rites at, St. Mary’s Church, East Moulsey, in Eng land, the other day. Prior to the mar riage ceremony a baby belonging to the Cooper family was baptized. The church was crowded with gypsies, who were in the neighborhood in great num bers to attend the Hampton races. Al most all the gypsies present were pro fusely decorated with wild flowers. —Accounts from Syria represent the condition of the country as worse than ever. In the interior there is no securi ty whatever cither for life or property, the neighborhood of Aidin is infested by three different bands of brigands, Win, without let or hindrance from tho authorities, plunder houses, rob travel ers, and take woll-to-do people captive and hold them to ransom. One villago has been completely ravaged and its in habitants despoiled of all they possessed. L consequence of these disorders, com xe„iet> and asgiciUiurc fers. —The Paris Figaro gives the follow ing recipe for making a froe tour of tho world: Adopt the Jewish religion and go to Russia. Thence you will be eject ed and forwarded by way of Lemberg to America by the eiVgs*:int a*tont. la America assume the garb ail'd ance of a Chinaman and you will bo dis patched to China. There give yourself out as a Russian and you will be re turned to that country, from which you may again be expelled as a Jev* and re turned to Austria—Q. E. D. “ He Cometh Not.” Quite a flutter of excitement has been caused in the circles of high society by the postponement of the wedding of Miss Alice Bottvier with the Prin *o Vallie. The lady is well known an 1 comes from an old Philadelphia fare’s'.' Her sister is the wife of the Frank Drexel. As the story go®*’ _ .. Miss B°P7igj:,,wa?,, tffrb'F'itufPn noe, who was ©ngagod In m.- travel*, and is said to be of the Italian branch of the Legiti mists, his mother being a Bourbon. The Prince and Miss Bouvier met each other frequently, and finally it was decided that they’should get married. Then tho trouble began. The Prince did not de sire to get married in France, because of the troubles of the law, but was willing to come to America for tho wodding. So it was decided that the wedding should take place in this city. The fact that the wedding was to occur in this place caused considerable talk in society circles, and the young lady was con gratulated upon all hands for her good fortune in having secured a real, live Prince. The most elaborate prepara tions were made for yie event, ami the invitations were prepared. The Prince promised, when lie loft liis inamorata in Paris, to follow her to the United State : as soon as he settled up some small business matters. As the day for his arrival approached there was considera ble of a sensation iu high society be cause of the anxiety of the young belie to catch a glinipso of the Prince, relative wont to Now York, but die Prince failed to arrive on th<- steamer. Letters and telegrams failed to reach him, and nothing has been learned of the whereabouts of the Bourbon since. The wedding has boon indefinitely post poned until tho man is found, and Mr. Dickson, a relative of the young lady, has been dispatched to Paris to clear up the mystery, and if possible find tho groom. The family and friends of the lady believe that some accident has hap pened to tho fiance, and until notified otherwise they will be loath to believe anything else. —Philadelphia Dispatch. —Brooklyn has a Dogberry who out does the most brilliant exploits of even Chicago’s eminent Justices of the Peace. Recently a respectable lady of that city requested twice to be excuse 1 from tes tifying in a case bo/ore £.— r ji ground mat, sne knew nothing of the circumstances. He swore her, swore at her and committed her to jail for thirty days for contempt of court, and she was released from the jail only after two days of incarceration. When she did get out a sentence for life would not ex press the amount of contempt she felt for that court. —Chicago Herald. Wanted Machinery. When the Arizona diamond excite ment was at its hight certain parties in Denver formed the “ Arizona Diamond Company,” capital $1,000,000, and is sued shares at live dollars each. Hun dreds of thousands of ihese shares were taken without auy questions being a-ked, but when the wind began to bloiv cold a certain Eastern man, who had invested about $5,000 and was hanging around for dividends, dropped into the 7x9 of fice of the company and inquired: “What are Shares worth to-day?” “About 90, I believe.” “ Has a dividend been declared yet?" “Not yet. We are iust getting in good shape to realize, however. As soon as we get our machinery' we shall have returns." “Machinery? What do you want of machinery? I thought the diamonds were picked up by hand?” “So they are. That is the old way of doing business, but this company can’t fool around picking up diamonds by the handtul. We have sent for machinery which loads a wagon in eleven minutes by the wr.tch, and if the cussed mules don't baulk we'U have the first twenty four wagon loads -here early in June. Fine weather—good-day, sir. Next!”— WaU Street News.