Newspaper Page Text
3H ititllc (fjcotgiti
W. F. SMITH, Publisher,
VOLUME X.
s WHEEL O' THE• BREAST.
r.irfi river* t)f veins, on n name loss „uest
H- of m* life goes hurriedly sw” T ANARUS,&
(• reaches that cutfous wheel o’ the breast
bup'hn heart, which is never at rest-"
‘iri fasrer, it cries, and, leaping
king, dashing, speeding away
V,h Ci and the river tfork night an q flay
„w not Wherefore, I know not whither
-:r mge tide rushes with fdich mad force
id'-' -atiither. it slides on thither ’
r ami over the self-same course *
i W er an outlet and never a source*
. * ashing itself to the heat of passion ’
a Iris the heart in mill-wheel fnshiori.’
n hear in the hush of lbe still, still night
ceaseless hum of that mighty river
, hear it rushing, gurgling, gushing,
to a wild, delirious, strange delight,
fa conscious pride in its sense of might.
It hurries and worries my heart forever!
i 1 vrondor oft, as 1 lio awake
list to the river that seethes and surges
r the wheet that it chides and urges—
mder ott if the wheel will break
h the mighty pressure it bears, some dav
lowly and wearily wear away. ’
little by little the heart is we iring,
t;tho wheel o’ the mill, as the tide goe
tearing *
plunging hurriedly through the breast
i network of veins on a nameless quest
m and forth unto unknown oceans, ’
gaig its cargoes of fierce emotions,
k uever a pause, or an hour for rest.
h ii Wheeler , in (Jhic&fjt) Tribune.
BLINKS’ DOG.
Irs. Blinks declared, she wouldn’t
r o another one of those little mo
rn in the house again; “for what
id are they anyway':” Mrs. Blinks
’d in ;in indiscriminate way, as she
ed in succession at the rocking chair,
French clock and the “God Bless
r Home” motto over the hall door,
no reply was vouchsafed from any
*of those, she went on: “If you’re
ng to have a dog, you want a dog
t is a dog, and not a plaything.”
drs. Blinks had read of the watch
r’s honest bark, and numberless nar
ives wherein the watch-dog aforesaid
s the hero, and the thief and murder-
Iho victim, and by consequence if
re was one thing more than another
it Mrs. Blinks had set her mind upon
:,n o wrs “a tlog that was a dog,”
lia so happily and lucidly expressed it.
io much had she said about this thing
t Blinks, one of the most devoted ol
ibaiuU could not iind it in his heart to
mirage, much les3 to thwart her ar
>t longing. It was some time, how
‘i\ ere lie could find just the dog that
eup to the ideal of what a dog
>uM be. finally he heard through a
“ii'l of a dog up country somewhere
ii<'h seemed to fill the bill to a nicety,
<1 negot at ions were at once entered
o which resulted in the animal’s be
forwarded by express
L ilay for the canine’s arrival was
• I forward to with joy and impa
nee, ami when the day, which seemed
long coining, did come at last, Blinks
irrieu down to the express office, with
:U) y a promise to his eager spouse that
'"oiud he hack just as quickly as lie
issiblv could.
l u, n Blinks got within a quarter
oo °f his destination, a noise reached
V :irs s,u ‘h as had never reached them
' "io. It sounded like the croakingof
'p 101 ’ °f frogs, each with a very bad
• b was not until he got a glimpse
n dr\-goods box and a vicious-look in <*■
l M ' protruding through the slatted sand e
‘■n he could so much as guess what
•is the ciinsH it oil
; -sihe cause of it all.
k was the dog. Blinks looked at his
nopoi ty in the dry-goods box. lie
i iii t go very near it. ’ Possibly he felt
"ould be rude to gaze at short range
!'" n nn imprisoned fellow creature.
animal was a cross between the bull
nu tho mastiff, and cross as both put
P 'her. Io say that he was possessed
| ail amiable countenance would be the
, 1 • attery. His prison-house was
1 led with shreds of coat-tails, trous
nf ik ' C '’ t . ormcrl y part of the raiment
r u ‘ trainmen, which he had sampled
time to time during his trip, as
h' Umity afforded, and he looked as
he would like very much to add
!to tin* collection.
banks was in a quandary. He stood
*7 roaxingly remarked to the dog
f. e ' V: ‘ s a nice fellow; but the aub
. <l not appear to tske the eompli-
*' m the spirit that was intended,
icw oke: 0 k e: \ to - v knocked the muzzle
tle bars of his cage in a most
U l? anaer ’ awakening the Kvliest
s] at ’I 1 ”hnk’s breast least oue.of those
S ? ould Sl, ddenly give away.
V hereiore - retreated in good
to tv Set abom bribing somebody
take h‘s treasure homo. He finally
rrp,r„! ! !u ex * >ressn i an whose needs were
labor 1 ' ! an , bls L’ars, and after much
RiU'h 116 08s ot some skin and
petti n*tK • tlle man in
p\ 10 ; deal dog into his \vag->n.
jvj a j :-'V‘V r lb, ‘ frog opera which the r i
in. with an occasional in
tho ° n "’inch was devoted to testing
,I,' ron ?fb °f his prison bars, the
ifittns't t 0 s bouse was devoid of
I lit- v ? no,ie r unloaded his living and
I*Vof re £ ht at K 1 inks’, and with the
leli i a , v m ore square inches of euti
iLv u, w P :,uts more of blood, the
k.• . e a °g were safely landed on
pazza. J
Ru Bl h ks was ’ °* oourse, delighted
Ro-t- , nobie beast - “So
|ur<\t V/- I . emarK od, extending her hand
I did not through the bars. She
|tr. -I j arr y out her intention, howev
lof tbit "*w something in the glare
|*s<l le-looking” dog’s eyes
that made Ker
Z\ mind - So she stepped back
Et& er v‘ es ’ au( l admired him from
RiC ß tr" e -
K\f. ra i l-, 9 congratulated each other
■tech a , _‘ les u Pon the acquisition of
Bttle triht asu ’J e * Of course, he was a
Bo ihenf^ ned now —it did not occur
Bee* o 'iV ) 1 . ai , l . vbfx L v else was fright
■ •bout it~i!nt U J leiUier i. 1 |Said an 3 thin S
he would grow accus-
Dwttd to Industrial Inter, st, th liffoin f Truth, the Establishment of l ustiee, aad the Preservation of a People’s Government.
tom e r l tt> them in a little while, and
wo.ild be as docile as a lytten. In the
Im ant.me it was concluded not to wor
t’y him just at present, but allow him
to remain on the piazza in his dry-o-oods
box. J °
So Blinks lowered some meat and
dr nk through the hole in the top of the
box, taking care to shut down the cover
as quickly as possible after having done
so. Blinks said some time afterward
that the animal ate a whole quarter of
bOi'f that first niirht: but this was. of
course, exaggeration born of disap
-1 o tiled hopes.
in the course of a week of alternate
slutting and starving, the dog began to
recognize the Blinkses as his friends and
protectors, and showing unmistakable
signs of contrition lor his previous un
grateful conduct, and a desire to concil
iate*, he was finally released from du
rance vile and allowed to roam about
the Blinks domain at bis own sweet will.
But although he had entered into so
cial compact with the Blinkses. Towser
(for such was his title) showed no dis
position to widen his circle of friends.
1 lie first morning after his release, the
milkman was seen running frantically
away from the house with torn clothing
nnd horrified visage, while Towser was
peering at him over the high fence,
shouting his frog opera as well as a
mouthful of coat-tail would permit him.
The milkman did not come again, and
he had apparently told his misadventure
to all the milk-dealing fraternity; for
not one of them could be induced to
come within twenty rods of the Blinks
re deuce. But this was not all. The
butcher, the baker, the candlestick
maker, and even the grocer, one and
all, suddenly ceased their calls for or
ders, and as it was a good mile to lhe
nearest store, the Blinkses were in dan
ger of starvation in the midst of plenty;
for Blinks was in the city all day, and
Mrs. B. was a very poor walker. # As
Blinks trudged back from the village of
an evening, heavily laden with family
supplies, he more than once half
wished that Towser wasn’t quite such
an ideal dog. after all.
But with all these discouragements,
that dog gave the Blinkses a topic for
conversation that was never dull nor
uninteresting. On the contrary, it was
quite thrilling and always possessed
something novel. One evening Mrs. B.
had to tell how Towser broke through
the fence and killed neighbor Jones’s
pet pussy; the next day his exploit con
sisted in making mutton of a stray
sheep, and the day following was marked
with the death of a goat or the maim
ing of a cow.
And so it went on, until not a resi
dent of the town was on speaking terms
with the Blinkses. Visiting them was,
of course, long ago out of the question.
Su Is at law began to ilovv in, and be
fore a month had passed, bankruptcy
began to stare poor Blinks almost out
of countenance.
It was clear that this state of things
could not go on much longer. Blinks
began to figure up the cost of keeping
an ideal d<g. In the first place there
was what the animal ate, at the current
rates about five dollars a week; then
there was the work of doing one’s own
marketing%and being one’s own truck
horse,* the loss of all friends, and
finally the lawsuits. Again Blinks
wished, this time quite heartily, that
Towser wasn't quite such an ideal dog.
The climax came at last, the timing
point in Towser’s career. Not content
with cats and goats and such small
game, he had the hardihood to attack
the good minister, who essayed to call
on the Blinkses in the performance of
his pastoral duties. Parson Brown lifted
the latch and got nearly half-way inside
the gate, when there was a cataclysm.
The ground was covered with dust and
clergy man and dog and blood and
shreds of clothing, all mixed together
in the most inextricable confusion.
it took Blinks and Mrs. Blinks and
three pounds of beefsteak to withdraw
TowsoiL* from the combination, and
much time and nursing and a good bit
of Blinks’ money to bring the parson
and liis raiment into anything near the
condition they were before his interview
with that ideal dog.
i his was the straw which broke the
camel’s bark, or rather the event which
drove Towser from his new home.
Blinks started off the very next morn
ing after Towser s ministerial exploit,
and did not rest until he found a man
who could be hired to take the dog
away. He did not ask the man to buy
the ideal dog. He did not give the
animal away; but he paid a handsome
bonus for the accommodation. And he
made no conditions as to what should
become of his ideal dog. He merely
said: “Take him away—any where, any
where: only take him away!”
The Blinkses have never kept a dog
since, not even “a dog that is a dog:’
and if you want to make Blinks tearing
mad, all you have got to do is to ask him
if he has bought another dog yet. — Mut
ton Transcript.
A Brave Girl.
The doctors are always ready to avail
themselves of all the human bodies they
can get to cut up in the dissecting-rooms,
bufc'there are probably comparatively few
of them who would be willing to con
tribute their own cadaver to the use of
the colleges when they get through with
them themselves. We lately had a letter
from a brave young woman now happily
recovering, but who, at one time, thought
she was. pretty nearly at the gates of
death. Speaking of her possible demise
she remarked: “In such an event I
prefer to abolish the undertaker and rob
the grave yard by having my body sent
to the dissecting-table, and, if possible,
disclose wherein I made the mistakes
that forfeited my life.” — Dr. Foot*?*
Health Monthly
INDIAN SPRINGS, GEORGIA.
Fires in Coal-Ships.
The liability to spontaneous ignition
of the cargoes of coal-laden vessels and
the precautions that tend to lessen the
liability form a question the full impor
tance of which one would expect every
of such vessels to recognize. Ti 9
Board of Trade has, however, consid
ered it necessary to once more place
before agents, owners and others a
recommendation of the Royal Commis
sioners who considered this subject, and
which advises the periodical and fre
quent testing of the temperature of
various portions of the cargo. If prop
erly performed, this would greatly de
crease the chances of ignition occurring,
though it would never completely avert
them. Almost all cases of spontaneous
ignition are directly due to some chem
ical action—generally oxidation—which,
acting in a confined space, gradually
generates sufficient heat to set fire to the
coal. The oxidizing of the impurities
in the coal is almost invariably the cause
of this spontaneous ignition ; and of the
impurities, iron pyrites are found the
most dangerous. " When, therefore, a
coal is notoriously “brassy,” as many
of our English coals are, the vigilance
of a shipmaster should be increased and
stricter attentien paid to the variation
of the temperature of the cargo than
when the coal is comparatively pure.
It is, of course, often an extremely dif
ficult matter to ascertain the actual tem
perature of the almost inaccessible inte
rior of a great bulk of coal, and this dif
ficulty is very frequently only imperfect
ly overcome, or not overcome at all.
During the voyage of the Challenger a
simple electrical contrivance was used
for ascertaining the temperature of the
sea at depths inaccessible to the ther
mometer, with perfect success. The
question suggests' itself whether a some
what similar method could not be em
ployed on shipboard. With a few of
these electrical thermometers distrib
uted throughout the mass of coal, a ship
master could at any time, ana with un
failing certainty, ascertain whether the
temperature of the interior of his cargo
was becoming too high for safety, and
so would be early enabled to take the
necessary steps to prevent fire and ex
plosion.—Liverpool Mercury*
Reminiscence of the Cholera Tear.
Captain Timothy Stannard, of West
brook, who was born 1796, is one of the
few surviving packet-sloop command
ers who made trips from this city to
New York and Albany. The round
trips varied in duration from one to two
and three w r eeks. Once Captain Stan
nard made the run up the North River
in twenty four hours, and sometimes it
would take a week. He says that at
the time of the cholera panic at New
York, in 1833, he left New Haven on a
Thursday and the next day he was sail
ing up the North ltiver. When eight
miles up from New York he noticed a
large number of partially-loaded ves
sels sailing down. “It did not take me
long to find out the trouble,” remarked
the old mariner. “I immediately
turned the sloop about and headed for
New York; and loading 500 barrels of
Hour and other stores, I bore away for
Hartford. They loaded me so hurriedly
that I found my flour had overrun four
teen barrels, and this lot I carried back
to the shippers on my next-trip. Leav
ing Hartford Saturday night, I arrived
at New Haven Sunday afternoon with
the balance of my load of provisions. I
tell you they were glad to see me,* for
they were fearing that they would be
starved out, owiDg to the panic in New
York. I loaded oa Tuesday. A num
ber of merchants came down to the
wharf and wished to know if I was not
afraid to return to New York. But I
was not afraid, for I believed that Gad
would help me. I never believed that I
would take the cholera, and I did not.
My crew were Westbrook men. They
got scared and left the sloop. But I got
anew crew and cleared. The mer
chants said they would give me lots of
business, and offered me a 25 per cent,
lay.” Continuing his narrative, Cap
tain Stannard said he made five round
trips to New York during the preva
lence of the cholera. With tears
in his eyes the veteran told of meeting
people in after years whom he had
helped to escape from the city. Once
lie had oil board fifty-five passengers
who, after arriving at this port, went to
t! e interior towns. — New Hawn ( Conn .)
Palladium.
The Art of Mezzotint.
These attempts at revising the art of
mezzotint as employed upon original
work have a special interest besides that
which attaches to them as experiments
so far successful and promising to be
still more so. They show the de
sire to cultivate a v ery beautiful
and refined style in which English
artists, inspired as they’ were by
the beautiful pictures of Reynolds and
Gainsborough, more than a hundred
vears ago, arrived at the highest perfec
tion. That the method should ever have
been suffered to fall into disuse, and be
supplanted by the more mechanical and
less artistic work produced in various
forms by various tools used to cut into
the plate in a more or less stiff and un
pliant manner, is much to be regretted.
It is essentially a painter’s method, more
pictorial than any other, and broader in
treatment, and one, therefore, that en
ables the artist to give full expression to
his feeling for the beauties of light and
sltr.de and every charm of gradation and
suggested color possible to a mono
chrome.
A Nebraska preacher stopped his ser
mon to give a baby a chance to cry, and
the vounst one spread himself with such
vigor that fee bßffit* bte©4 veel.
A Cute Yankee.
A Y ankee peddler while traveling in the
West became somewhat embarrassed
for want of funds, and resolved to em
bark in his accustomed occupation. He
reached a small city in one of the fron
tier States. After taking a survey of the
surroundings he received his stock of
goods and proceeded to dispose of his
wares, consisting of scissors, pocket
knives, razors, spoons, etc. He had
not journeyed far before an officer ac
costed him and called for a license. He
had none and so informed the official
who, finding the peddler a stranger and
not familiar with the law, desired to be
as lenient as possible, and simply di
rected him to the City Hall to receive
the necessary document. The Yankee
proceeded to find the proper official
and inquired the price of a license to
run for a week, and found it more than
his surplus capital. Therefore he se
cured one for only a day. At night the
Yankee footed up his profits, and found
that he had lost money, and resolved
to continue without renewing his li
cense. Several days passed, and he
was in nowise molested, but one warm
day about ten o’clock in the morning,
he was approached by a corpulent Ger
man, with the inquiry: “You got li
cense.” The Yankee said: “Oh, yes,
certainly,” and moved on. But the
vigilant special was not so easily satis
fied, and followed him up, saying:
“Meester, you got license, I look at
him.” The Yankee again informed the
officer that he had a license, but the lit
tle Dutchman said: “Veel, veel, you got
license all right, but I look at him.”
The Yankee, seeing he must get out of
his difficulty either legally or by his wits,
said: “Are you an officer?” The Teuton
ic official said: “Yes, I vas an ofeecer.”
“Well,” said the Yankee, “whereisycur
badge, sir?” The officer- was in his shirt
sleeves, and looked as if lie might have
been a grocer or some other tradesman.
He did not say a word, but jumped into
his wagon and drove rapidly away. The
Yankee concluded the Western people
had learned the game of blutt‘ but
thought they would have to rise early to
get ahead of a down-easter. The ped
dler .visited the next hoUSe and ottered
his wares as before, making a sale, and
bidding the lady good day started for
the street, when to his horror and sur
prise, he saw the persistent official
standing at the gate accompanied by
another gentleman. As the Yankee
reached the walk the portly little Ger
man said: “You got no license, eh,
?ou come mid me, you my prisoner.”
'he Yankee looked somewhat fright
ened, and in a low voice said: “Your
badge, sir.” The official was now robed
with coat and vest, and pulling away
the lapel of his coat and patting his
breast violently, said: “Dere, dere be’s
my badge.”
“Ah,” said the Yankee, “you are an
officer.” The official said: “That’s
shust what I vas,” and straightened up
in the usual official style and expanded
his lungs as if to pounce upon his prey,
when the Yankee slowly placed his
fingers in his vest pocket and pulled
out a document branded, signed and
sealed, License. The official seeing the
headline license, wilted without exam
ination, and turned and with one leap
landed in his wagon and drove out of
sight.
The writer was an eye witness to the
scene, and, being amused by the circus,
strolled down the street to where the
Yankee was, and accosted him, saying:
“That was well played.” “Ah,” said
the Yankee, with a wink of his eye,
“you don’t see the point. My license
expired a week ago.” —New Haven Reg
ister.
Boys, Go Homer
Ah, boys! you who have gone out
from the homesteads into the rush and
bustle of life, do you ever think of the
patient mothers who are stretching out
to you arms that are powerless to draw
you back to the old home nest? arms that
were strong to carry you once, pressed
to hearts that love you uow as then.
No matter, though your hair is silver
streaked, and Dot in the cradle calls
J r ou grandpa, you are “the boy” so
ong as mother lives. You are the
children of the old home. Nothing can
crowd you out of your mother 7 s heart.
You may have failed in the battle of
life, and your manhood miy have been
crushed out against the wall of circum
stances; you may have been prosperous,
gained wealth and fame; but mother’s
love has followed you always. Many a
“ boy” has not been home for fivlf or
ten or twenty years. And all this
time mother has been waiting. Ah,
who does not know the agony expressed
by that word? She may be even now
saying, “I dreamed of my John last
night. May be he will come to-day. He
may drop iD for dinner,” and the poor,
trembling hands prepare ‘some favorite
dish for him. Dinner comes and goes,
but John comes not w ith it. Thus, day
after day, month after month, year af
ter year, passes, till at last, “hope de
ferred maketh the heart sick,” aye,
sick unto death: the feeble arms are
stretched out no longer.
The dim eves are closed, the gray
hairs smoothed for the last time, and
the tired hands are folded for everlast
ing rest, and the mother waits no more
on earth for one who comes not God
grant that she may not, in vain, wait
for his coming in the Heavenly home.
Once more f say unto you boys, go
home, if only for a day. Let mother
know you have not forgotten her. Her
days may be numbered. Nest winter
may cover her grave with snow.
—Rubbing the horse morning and
noon with a handful of smart weed will
prevent the llies from troubling him
during the day.
Old Hotel Registers.
“What becomes of the old hotel reg
isters?” inquired a Sun reporter of Je
rome Leland, of the Sturtevant House.
“Got ’em all in a big safe down
stairs. Come and take a look,” said
Mr. Leland. Then he led the way
through a subterranean labyrinth of
cooks, ranges, laundries, stores and
wine cellars to a vault under the side
walk next to a room where the ther
mometer would have registered 200 de
grees, if the register had permitted.
The hot room contained the stove where
irons were heated for the laundry.
“You see I had this vault built on pur
pose to keep these books. No danger of
their getting damp ot mildewed here.”
“Do you ever have to refer to them?”
“Very often it becomes necessary to
establish the fact that a man was here
at a certain time. It is a common oc
currence to fix the dates of business
transactions by these registers, and they
are frequently used in court.”
“ But that must be a trouble to you?”
“Yes, of course; but we don’t mind
taking a little trouble for a friend.”
“ Are you bothered by getting your
clerks subpoenaed to produce the books
in court?”
“Sometimes; but it is very difficult to
be certain that any of us was here at
any particular time, if we can’t spare
the time to go and testify.”
You must have a great many valuable
autographs in these registers.”
“Lots of ’em; but we never allow
them to be cut out. There are all the
registers just as we have had them for
eleven years.”
Charles Stetson, of the Astor House,
has preserved all the old registers of
that famed resort. He has in them a
series of autographs of the most distin
guished public men of the last half cen
tury. These books he has kept relig
iously, never permitting them to be
mutilated by autograph-hunters. They
were taken away by him when he left
the Astor House. On their pages may
be found the names of Clay, Webster,
Calhoun, and a long line of Presidents
who visited the Astor House during the
many years that it was the chief hostelry
of the city. The Leland family have
generally preserved their registers in
the various hotels they have kept
throughout the country.
At the Brevoort House the old regis
ters contain many of the names of dis
tinguished foreigners who have visited
this country and made the Brevoort
their headquarters. The late Mr. Hawk,
of the Windsor, one of the oldest hotel*
keepers in New York, had many old
registers whose names comprise some
of the most noted professional men in
the United States, as well as leading
arealthy citizens. It is generally the
rule that when a hotel changes hands
the old proprietor takes away the reg
ister. When the Hoflinan Douse re
cently changed hands the old registers
disappeared. There are a great many
old registers at the New York Hotel.
Here, during the many years that it was
kept by Hiram Cranston, the leading
men of the South gathered and left their
names. Mr. Cranston always kept his
registers. His son, Hiram Cranston, Jr.,
does the same. There was a very inter
esting set of registers in the Metropolitan
Hotel when it was kept by Tweed
and Garvey, but they have disappeared.
Mr. Henry Clair, the present manager,
keeps the registers at this house as well
as at the other hotels owned by the
Stewart estate. The Metropolitan uses
about two registers in a month. The
St. Denis and the Albemarle have pre
served all the old registers. The St.
Nicholas, now one of the oldest hotels
in town, has a big pile of registers, con
taining a generation of distinguished
names. At the Everett House the old
registers are kept, and frequently re
ferred to by old customers.
But there is one hotel where the old
registers are not regarded with much
reverence. That is the Fifth Avenue
Hotel, now under the same proprietor
ship that it was when started more than
twenty-one years ago, that of Hotchkiss
& Darling. For many years the old
registers were kent. and often referred
to. Time anc again they have been
lugged into court aud clerks with them
under subpoemis, Duces Tecum. Final
ly the proprietors got tired of furnish
ing so much testimony to courts with
out adequate compensation. It w r as
found that by keeping the registers
often a couple w r ho stayed but one night
• and paid ten dollars" into the hotel
treasury might entail fifty dollars worth
of bother by legal proceedings in prov
ing the register. Therefore, about six
months ago. orders were given to burn
the registers as fast as they are filled.
As the urbane light-haired clerk ex
pressed it: “We don t let ’em get cold,
but get ’em out of the way at the earli
est possible moment People can now r
look else w’here for testimony. We can’t
a'ford to keep one clerk hunting for
books and another on the witness stand
all the time.” — N. Y. Sun.
—The manufacture of peach-basketa
has become an important
Years ago the baskets were made by
hand, costing from 25 to 30 cents, and
the loss of any considerable number of
them was a serious matter. But the
establishment of great factories, re
quired by the growth of the peach
trade, has reduced the price to a mod
erate figure, varying from $6 to $8 per
100. Along the Maryland railroads
there are now eight or nine basket
factories, each making from 2,500 to
4,000 baskets a day durimr the busy
season. The bottoms and hoops are
road* of Maryland pine, and the staves
from the Delaware gum tree— Chicago
Times.
SUBSCRIPTION"SI.BD.
NUMBER 6.
HUMOROUS.
—-A real stylish house on a good street
m New York costs $100,000; just $99,-
999 more than we’ve got.— Ndk> Haven
Register.
—Brooklyn, N. Y., has been counting
up her lawyers, and is rejoiced to find
that she has only about I.6oo. — Detroit
Free Press.
—Ladies when being courted ought not
to objeot to the moderate use of tobac
co. They should recollect that where
there is a “fiame” there must be some
smoke.
—“ Great Pains Taken” is the head
ing of an advertisement in one of the
dailies. Probably some gentleman has
eaten a whole watermelon. — Boston
Commercial Bulletin.
—Definition of loot: Student wants to
know what is meant by the word “loot”
in the war dispatches. Why, a lute is
a thing with strings that you strum with
your fingers. Hence, anything that you
can get your fingers on to, that’s loot.
—Burlington Hawkeye.
—Water privileges: “You advertise
tliat there is a fine stream of water on
the place, but I don’t see it,” remarked
a stranger who wanted to rent the place.
The landlord said: “Just work that
pump-handle a little, and you will see a
fine stream of water. You don’t expect
to have the Niagara Falls on the place
for fifteen shillings a month, do you?”-
Texcts Siftings.
—“They err who tell us politeness
has lied,”" says a French paper, and
calls to witness the following postscript
to a letter lately received by the Due ae
X—from the steward of one of his es
tates: “I beg that your grace will ex
cuse for having taken the liberty of
writing this letter in my shirt sleeves,
but the excessive heat has compelled
me to be guilty of this apparent disre
spect.”
—The Masher:
“ What is that mother?”
“ A masher, dear;
You will always And it standing here.
Posed on the corner of the street.
Proudly displaying' its tiny feet,
Twirling it3 little ten-cent cana.
And stui efying its tender brain
With th° smoke of a paper cigaret. *
Don’t touch it, dear—it was raised a pdW
** Will it bite, motherl”
“ Well, I should shout;
It will bitea free lunch for all that’s tut.”
Washington Republican.
—Making pictures in the clouds just
as the sun was going down, gilding th.<
edges with gold and turning the silv% '
lining almost inside out: “Oh, thei< >
a great big chariot wif horses
ponies, and- and oh, it’s all £jono now,”
said little curly lia'r. “Huh! 1 said
lit tle shavey head. “ I see a little angel
now.” “Where is it?” “Oh, it's
gone now. You are the only little
angel left.” Needn’t tell us children
can’t be gallant. —New Haven Register .
Death to Flies in One-half Honr.
Heretofore one of the greatest of our
trials in summer has been in the keep
ing of our dining room and kitchen free
from fiies. It is a rule with us that nets
shall be in all opened windows and that
the ret doors must be kept closed, and
th< re is no deviation from this. But
c • eful as we might be the pests would
got in. We have brushed until shoul
ders and arm were lame and hands blis
tered ; have used various fly-catchers,
sticky fly paper and poison fly paper,
discarding the latter several times on
account of its poisonous properties and
disgusting effects,but returning to it be
cause we did not know what else to do.
We will say that our house is very
sunny, light and airy—we have no
blinds, and can not darken the rooms
and so keep the flies out. A short time
ago we became alive to the necessity of
throwing away once for- all the fly pa
per, having been convinced that it wfts
impregnated with a solution of arsenic.
Knowing the efficacy of Persian insect
powder—Pyrethrum roseum or cineras
folium—in destroying insect life, we
closed the windows and doors of the
dining-room, sprinkled a large handful
of this powder upon a few live coals and
retired to await results. The smoke was
quite dense for two hour?, yet at the
end of that time not one fly was dead,
they were somewhat weak in the legs,
but soon revived.
After this failure we next purchased
a small insect rowder bellows for one
dollar, half filled the receptacle with
powder and blew it all around the room,
making a fine dust. Soon a buzzing
was heard, as when a fly is oaught in a
spider’s web, only lot der, and in one
half hour every fly in the room was
dead. The fly season is now robbed of
its terrors for us, for a few puffs of the
bellows each morning before sweeping
keeps our rooms free from flies. The
powder costs 60 cents per pound at
wholesale, but with care will last some
time, for gentle puffs of the powder
answer every purpose, as it is only nec
essary to blow it once where the flies
can breath it.—Cbr. Rural New Yorker .
Won the Wager.
Fred Flasher and Miss Florentia
Flounce were discussihg the mentai
power of controlling thought. Soft
Flasher: #
“I will give you a pair of gloves fc
you can think of positively nothing for
five minutes and still be awake.”
“Done,” she responded.
Five minutes parsed.
“I’ve won the gloves! ” she exclaimed.
“How did you manage to think of
nothing for the whole five minutes?” he
asked, eagerly.
“I fastened my mind firmly on your
mustache and kept it there,” she re
plied, triumphantly.
The referee awarded her the gloves.
—J Detroit Free Frets.