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FI NNY SAYINGS ANh DOINGS.
Woman win made from r rib bone ; nml
ahe loves rib-bon(c)a to this day.
“There is music in the heir.” as the man
said as he listened to the squalls of his lirst
bom.
There is some clover in Lexington so
short, that it must be lathered before you
can mow.
A Georgia man is suing another for
f lulling his nose. The latter thought it
ooked ripe enough to pull.
• “It Is well to leave something for those
after us,” ns a man said when he threw a
barrel in the way of a constable who was
chasing him.
Anew paper in Texas starts out with
the announcement, that “in religion we are
conservative, ami we intend to adhere to
the cash system.”
A young innn having complained that a
young lady had sat upon his hat, he was
told that he ought to Know better than to
bold his hat in his Inp.
A drunkard, on being told that the earth
was round, and turns on its axis all the
time, said. “ I believe that, for I've never
been able to stand on the darn thing.”
A coxcomb wishing some milk, said:
“Landlady please pass your cow this way.”
“Waiter,” said the hostess, “take the
cow down there whore the calf is bleating.”
“Sam, why don’t you talk to your mas
ter and tell him to* lay up treasures in
Heaven?” “ What’s de use of him layin’
up treasures up dar? lie never see um
Jgin.”
• Have you seen my black-faced antelope?
inqurod Mr. Leosconc, who had *i collec
tion of Animals, of his friend Bottlejack.
“ No, I have not. Whom did your black
faeed aunt elope with.”
A man innocently spoiled a sermon and
prayer by exclaiming, while (lie tears roll
fed down his cheeks’ “ Lord Thou knowest
that Hayes is a good man and Tildcn an
old, hardened bachelor.”
The Yankees debate strange questions
down East. The last was, “What is the
difference petween the bridge of Sighs and
the size of a bridge ?” The next is to be,
“ The difference between a fac simile and a
sick family.”
Copy was out. The devil picked up a
paper and said: “Here's something
‘ About a woman ’—must, I cut it out?”
44 N0 !” thundered the editor, “the first
disturbance in the world was occasioned
by the devil fooling about a woman.”
MUrcllnnooiut Item#.
Education begins a man, Travel com
pletes him.
A Troup county lad. in twelve days, split
five thousand and seven hundred rails.
Isn't this better muscular development
than base ball !
Charleston Pudding. Two cups of flour,
one and a half cups of sugar, one-half cup
of butter, one-half cup milk or cream, one
half teaspoon of soda, one teaspoon of
cream tartar, Ihrec eggs. lleat all well,
and bake in rather a quick oven, eat with
a rich sauce.
In the cell of a prison, on the stone
wall, was recently found a picture, drawn
ltv a miserable man who went from that
spot to be hung. It was that of a scaffold
with five steps leading to it. Each of (hose
steps was named. The first was. “ Diso
bedience to Parents;*’ the second. “Sab
bath-breaking the third. “ Gambling and
Drunkenness;” ihc fourth, “Murder;”
the fifth was called, “ The Fatal Platform,”
and just above it was the scaffold where he
was to end his wretched life. Boys, if you
would avoid the last step, don’t set your
foot upon the first. Beware of the begin
ning of evil.
Don’t judge a man by the clothes he
wears, for God made one, the tailor the
other.
Don’t judge a man by the house he lives
in. for the lizzard and rat sometimes in
habit the grandest of structures.
Don’t judge him by his speech, for the
parrot talks and the tongue is but an in
strument to make sound.
Don’t judge him by his family connec
tions. for Cain belonged to a very respect
able family.
Don.t think when you have gone to
church on Sunday that entitles you to do
as you please the ballance of the week.
The upright man lives through the six as
he does the seventh day.
Hl*i I.eKiNlalivr Hill.
Detroit Free Press.
The man who failed to get his bill through
the Legislature was eating dinner in a Jef
ferson avenue restaurant yesterday. He
felt bad and mad. as he had been at Lan
sing for a week or ten days. Said he to
the colored waiter :
“ Young man, don’t you ever have
nothing to do with the Legislature.”
“ No, sah, I won't, sail,” was the reply.
“Because, when you think you've got
got 'em you hain’t got 'em at all.”
“ Jess' so, sail —jess like you think you
is walkin' on de dock, when you is in de
ribber all de time.”
“ I went down there to get a pine tim
ber bill passed,” continued the stranger
as he opened another biscuit, “ and I'm a
hundred dollars out of pocket and no bill.”
“ Jess so, sah. Dey wasn’t on de pass
when your bill came in.”
“ No, blast em ! I handed out the cigars
by the thousand, talked soft and sweet,
sat up nights till my bones ached, and I
fiuallv got a man interested. I talked and
he talked, and I thought that bill would
scoot through like a saw-log going over a
dam.”
“ Jes’ de 'same, sail’ but derc's whar'
. you got left behin,d I spose ?”
“ I don’t know whether 1 was left be
hind or ahead, but I kept poking the man
up, and he kept promising, and there I was
! all the time paving out money as free
ly as a young fellow with his girl at a chick
en now."
44 A million dollars don’t las’ no time
’tallaroun’ de halls of justis an ’ Icgisla
shun,” sighed the waiter as he pushed the
sugar bowl nearer.
“ Wei! yesterday morning the man came
over to the hotel, face a yard long, and says
he : “Mr. Shoat. your bill has been kill
ed,” and before 1 could recover from the
cold chill that crept over me he went on to
toll ine about comtnintce of the whole,
third reading, objected to, titles and bodies,
laid on the table, suspension of the rules,
moves to reconsider, ami a lot of other such
stuff.”
44 Yes. salpSrlat's jess de way dey alius
goes on. sah. lze beam 'em tell ’bout dat
committco of hole, an’ suspension of de
table, an’ lyin’ de bills on de winder-sill.
I used to liv nex’ doah to de Legislachur,
an’ 1 knows all 'bout ’em, sab.”
“ Well. I couldn’t do anything.” sadly
continued the man, “ They hitched a dog
act to one end of my bill, a musk rat law to
the other, changed the title to, 4 An Act to
Fund an Orphan Asylum,’ and rushed it
up and down and around till the durn
thing got tired out and couldn't go any fur
ther. I’vo been postmaster, and town li
brarian, and I’ve laid out two ditches, and
I've been deputy constable, and all that,
but it didn’t make any difference to them
out there —not a bit.”
41 Hat's a fac’ sah. 1 sometimes believe
dat de higher up a man gits de lower de
folks looks down on him.”
“ Well they laid me out, but I'll be even
with’em yet. I’ve got a chattle mortgage
on one of our county papers, and I’ll go
home uml tell the editor lie’s got to bust
into that crowd about four columns a week
or I'll foreclose on him in aminit!”
“Yes, sah—take de foreclose on him
like you jess foreclosed on dat biscuit. 1
'predates de motive, sah, an’ lze willin' to
do all I kin. He bill is fifty cents, sah—
pay at de desk.”
Hurl County Directory.
COUNTY OFKK KUH.
Ordinary —Fred. C. Stephenson.
Clerk Superior Court —('. A. Wobb.
Sheriff —J. Robert Myers,
Tax lleeeirer —J. M. Thornton.
Tax Collector —James L. Johnson,
Treasurer —J. (). Belie.
Surveyor —Allen S. Turner,
Coroner —K. Phillips.
School Commissioner —Clins. W. Seidel.
TOWN OFFICERS.
Mayor —John Peek.
Secretary and Treasurer —W. K. Stephenson.
Councilman —K. B. Benson. James W. Williams,
W. 11. Stephenson, E. 11. Sanders, W. R. Stephenson
Hart Connty Kelitfious Directory.
METHODIST.
Rev. W. I*. SMITH. Pastor.
hethexda —lst Sabbath and Saturday before.
Hartwell —2nd “ “ 44 . ‘‘
Ml. '/.ion— 2nd “ at 4 p. m.
Cokeshnry —3rd Sabbath, and Saturday before,
Providence —4tli “ “
Rev. John Quvu.aN, Pastor.
Fellowship —lst Saturday and Sunday.
Center —2nd
Uedwine — ad “
Macedonia —4th “
Pennington's Chapel —2d Sunday at 3 p. m.
Sen-town —3d Sunday at 3 1-2 p. in.
Samuel Gilliland's— lth Sunday at 3 1-2 p. in.
BAPTIST.
■Rev. 11. M. Barton, Pastor.
Ilartirell —4th Sabbath and Saturday before.
Shoal Creek—A l Sabbath and Saturday before, mo’ly.
Rev. J. T. W. V UK.NON, Pastor.
Milltou'n —i!d Sabbath and Saturday before, monthly.
Kov. L. W. Stei'HKXs. Pastor.
Hendry'* —2d Sabbath and Saturday before, monthly.
Rev. .Tames H. MeMi U.ex, Pastor.
Line —3ixl Sabbath and Saturday before, monthly.
Heed Creek —4th “
Sard**— lst “ “ “ “
Rev. I. 11. Goss, Pastor.
Cro** Hoad* —4th Sabbath and Saturday before.
Rev. John D. A hams. Pastor.
Cannon'* —2d Sabbath and Saturday before, monthly.
Rev. J. K. Kakle, Pastor.
PRKSBVTKR r AN.
Rev. John B. Morton, Pastor.
Fhanant Hill —3rd Sabbath in eaeh mouth.
“Biewjrj Spicy, Reliable.”
The Atlanta Constitution.
Under its new management, The Atlanta Con
stitution lias won for itself the title of the leading
journal of the south. Its enterprise, during the re
eent eleetion excitement, in sending correspondents
to different portions of the eountry, and its series ot
special telegrams from Washington while the electo
ral commission was engaged in eonsumnting the fraud
that placed radicalism once more in power in our na
tional councils, are evidence conspicuous enough to
prove that no expense will he spared to make The
Constitution not onlv a leader in the discussion of
public.concern, hut a leader in the dissemination of
the latest and most reliable news. There is no bet
ter time than now to subscribe for
A Fresh anil Vigorous Newspaper.
Albeit there lias been a Quasi settlement of one of
the most difficult and dangerous problems of modern
ami federal polities, the discussion springing there
from and the results likely to ensue have lost nothing
of their absorbing interest. In addition to tills, the
people of Georgia are now called upon to settle
Tlie Convention Question,
and in discussion of this important subject [in which
The Constitution will taken loading part] every
Georgian is interested. If a convention is called its
proves slings will And tlieirearliest and fullest embodi
ment in the columns of The Constitution, and this
fact alone will make the paper indispensable to every
citizen of the state. To be brief.
The Atlanta Hally Constitution
wilt endeavor. by all the means that the progress of
modern journalism has made possible and necessary
to hold Its place ns a leader ot southern opinion and
as a purveyor of the latest news. Its editorials wil
be thoughtful, timely and vigorous—calm and argu
montave in their methods and thoroughly southern
ami democratic in their sentiments. Its news will
be fresh, reliable and carefully digested. It will he
alert and enterprising, and no expense will he spared
to make it the medium of the latest and most import
ant intelligence.
The Weekly Constitution.
Besides embodying everything of interest in the
daily. The Weekly Constitution will contain a
Department of Agriculture, which will be in charge
of Mr Malcolm Johnson, the well known Secretary
of Georgia State Agricultural Society. This depart
ment will be made a specialty. ami will be thorough
anil complete. The farmer will timl in it not only
all the current information on the subject oi agricul
ture hut timely suggestions and well-digested advice.
Subscriptions should he sent at once.
Terms for the Birily.
1 month - l - • • • • t *
3 mouths - • • * ’ ? ,
G months • - * * * .5 {JJ
12 months \ • * • • 10 00
TcrniM for the Weekly.
6 months • • * • • f l 10
12 months - • * • * -20
Money may he sent by postoffice money order at
our expense. Address
THE CONSTITUTION, Atlanta, Ga
CHEAPEST AND BEST
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IN THE SOUTH.
AT A. K. CHILDS k CO’S,-
ATHENS, GEORGIA.
Ayer’s
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Thin hair is thickened, falling hair
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1 w 77.
TJ IE
HARTWELL SUN.
PROSPECTUS.
THE HARTWELL SUN will be a
Democratic Journal, devoted to tlie in
terests of the People.
The Latest News will be furnished
from all parts of the country, culled
with care, and given in condensed form.
General Reading Matter on Polities,
Agriculture, Commerce, Finance, Lit
erature, etc., will find due space in our
columns.
Local Items will be sought assidu
ously, and will be a distinctive feature.
In fine, THE SUN intends to be a
Paper for the People, and our objects in
publishing this Journal are to give the
public reliable information and the latest
news, together with political views in
accord with their own, as also to furnish
means of support and consequent com
petence to those engaged in the enter
prise.
THE SUN has been placed at the
exceedingly low price of
ONE DOLLAR AND A HALF.
We commend THE SUN to your
consideration, and bespeak your patron
age. We hope to receive such encour
agement as will compensate our en
deavors.
CLUB * RATES:
Clubs of Ten subscribers will be enti
tled to an extra copy.
BENSON & McGILL,
Publishers.
Old papers for sale at this office.
A. K. CHILDS. R. NICKERSON. Y. H. WYNN.
CHILDS, NICKERSON & CO.,
No. 15 Franklin House linililiiiK, Alliens. (in.,
WHOLESALE AND RETAIL DEALERS IN
HARD V „■ VRE,
IRON, STEEL, NAILS,
HORSE and MULE SHOES,
HORSE SHOE NAILS,
AGRICULTURAL IM PLEME NT S,
Leads, Oils, Glass and Varnish, Harness Leather,
MI L B URN WAGONS,
COTTON , MANILLA AND JUTJi HOVE ,
Carriage and Saddlery Hardware, Felloes, Hubs, Spokes, Buggy Wheels, Axles,
Springs, etc.. Rubber and Leather Belting, Mill Saws, Mill Findings, Anvils,
Bellows, Vices, Hollow Ware, etc. Manufacturer’s agents for the sale of
FAIRBANKS STANDARD SCALES,
WINSHIP AND SAWYER’S CELEBRATED COTTON GINS,
Cider Mills, Syrup Mills and Evaporators. Watt Plows, Farmers’ Friend Plow, Pumps,
Circular Saws, etc.
Any article in our line not in stork, will he ordered when desired, with the
least possible delay. CALL ANI) EXAMINE OUll STOCK AND EE ICES. 11
THE HARTWELL HIGH SCHOOL.
JL HE Spring Session for 1877 will open on Monday 29th of January, and con
tinue for Five Scholastic Months. *
RATES OF TUITION PER SESSION yF FIVE MONTHS:
Fourth Flara—Spelling, Reading, Writing 810.00
Third Clara—Arithmetic, Urninmar, Geography, (Commenced) 15.00
SiH'ond Clara- Higher Kngllsli Brandies 30.00
First Class —Classics, Higher Mathematic*, fe 25.00
Contingent Fee per Session 1,00
Music (Extra) 25.00
Tuition due at the dose of the Session ; but if paid in advance, twenty
per cent will be deducted from the above rates.
Pupils, entering within two weeks of the opening, will pay for the entire Session ;
those entering after that time will pay for le remainder of the Session.
No deduction made for absence, except in cases of sickness protracted for two
weeks or longer at a time.
Liberal deduction to Ministers of the Gospel of any sect.
Students will be required to conform to strict rules of discipline, both in and
out of School.
M. V. LOONEY,
MRS. A. B. LOONEY.
TO THE PUBLIC.
I RESPECTFULLY call your attention to my continued reduction in prices, and
large receipt of new' Goods arriving by every Steamer trom my factory. Business
has now reached large proportions (having increased materially during the last year.;
T have been compelled to enlarge my AY arerooms, which are located on broad > treet,
facing Monument Street, (known as the Eagle & Phoenix Hotel.) J lie dimensions of the
building arc seventy feet front by one hundred and twenty-five deep, three stones high*
Thev are said to be the largest and finest Warerooms in the Southern States.
My Stock will compare with Northern and Western markets for price and selection.
Thanking you for past favors, and awaiting further and 'esteemed patronage, I Temain
Yours respectfully,
G. V. IVGRAAF,
Successor fo E. G. ROGERS , Wholesale and Retail Furniture Dealer and Undertaker.
147,1471 & 149 BROAD STREET, AUGUSTA, GA.
UNDERTAKING IN ALL ITS BRANCHES.
Sunday and Night calls 102 Greene Street u
To the Working Class— We are now prepared
to furnish all classes with constant employment at
home the whole of the time or for their spare moments.
Business new, light and profitable. Persons of either
sex easily earn from 50 cents to |5 per evening, and a
proportional sum by devoting their whole time to the
business. Hoys and girls earn nearly as much as men.
That all who'see this notice may send their address,
and test the business, we make this unparalleled otter:
To such as are not satisfied we will send one dollar
to pav for the trouble of writing. Full particulars,
samples worth several dollars to commence work on,
and a copy of Home and Fireside, one of the largest
and best Illustrated Publications, all sent free by mail.
Header, if you want permanent, profitable work, ad
dress, George Stinson & Cos., Portland, Maine. 23
PUDfI II n C and small, for Dealers, Tea
OntlUlTlUdi Stores, Agents, etc.
Twenty 9xll Chromos for 81.00.
IAKGEST ASSORTMENT in the world. George
J and Martha Washington. Pope Pius IX. Comte
Subjects, Magnificent Crosses. Birds, Children, Fruit
Flowers. Landscapes, etc. Two samples by mail, 20
cents. Send stamp for superbly illustrated catalogue.
J. LATHAM A CO..
Headquarters for Foreion * American Chromos,
419 Washington Street,
Box 2,154, (14) Boston, Mass.
GLOBE HOTEL.
COR. JACKSON AND lIKOAB STREETS,
AUGUSTA, GA.
Thoroughly Renovated. Remodeled and
Newly Furnished.
Located in the centre o f business ;
In convenient distance of the Railroads ;
Near the Telegraph and Express Offices.
And under the Present Management
Will l*e Surpassed bfNone in the South.
JOHN W. CAMERON. Prop'r.
Thos. M. Binfokd, Chief Clerk.
Can't be made by every agent every
month in the business we furnish, hut
those willing to work can earn a dor
en dollars a day right in their own lo
calities. Have no room to explain here.
Business pleasant and honorable. Women, and boys
and girls no as w ell as men. AVe will furnish yon a
complete outfit free. The business pays letter than
anything else. AVe will bear expense of starting you.
Particulars free. Write and see. Farmers and me
chanics, their sons and daughters, and all classes in
need of paving work at home, should write to us and
learn all about the work at once. Now is the tic
Don't delay. Address Ikue A Co-, Aum- 4