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About The democrat. (Crawfordville, Ga.) 1877-1881 | View Entire Issue (Feb. 25, 1881)
The Democrat. A Uvc Weekly Paper on Liv Issues Published Every Friday Morning, at Urawfordvllle, Ga. M. 2. Andrews, Proprietor. HATES OF SUliSVRIPTIOX: ■Single t aipv, <obe year.) . . . s i So Niugle U'opy, (six months.) . 75 Single Copy, (three months,) . 50 f#~ Advertising rates liberal. BOOK •and JOB Pltl NTING a specialty. Prices to suit tlic times. Hotel Cards. QLINAUD HOUSE, CLAYTON 8TBEKT, Ny.tK FOST-OKFU E, ATHENS, GEORGIA. Rooms all carpeted. Good sample rooms for Commercial Travelers. A. !). CL1XARD, i’roprictor. Rational hotel, ATLANTA, GEORGIA, K. T. AYIHTE, Proprietor. This House is now complete with its im¬ provements, viz.: The addition of a third story, giving thirty-three additional rooms, capacity thing now seventy-live biiglit more, w ith every¬ fresh and ami all the modern improvements. Being t , situated near the Depot and con¬ venient to the business houses. The Na offers tional, superior newly renovated inducements and refurnished, to the Travel ing Public. Tates, . 52.00 per day. Special rates for longer time. rjqiE GLOBE HOTEL; k'OltXEIJ KIOHTH -VNiL I'.UOAO STREETS. AliGCtlTA, GEORGIA. Is eeiil wall; rally located, and within live min ujes’ ut ni! the principal Business Houses. Bank’s. Post Oftlec, Public Build OflV’es ings, Union and Express Depot, Opera House, Telegraph Oiliee. Sf.rect ears pass the door, going to all parts during of the city and vicinity, every liv. 1 aei.utes .•The House the jlay. Is supplied wilii ail The r<r Nenienees of a a. first-class XL Per . Hot-I. aiul is jintl 11 tiriii with all convenient fiuBitifgi s^mj»n»s. i*n < Uiunini rial Travelers eanyinj* Each r<*om eonnerteil with (!.*<• oJHee hy hells. Ti'lcphnm* at faehment with lherity and Summerville in th$ ('Mcelur tlieaovtjni inodation of j^uestsy Vr, S. ATKINSON tV SONS, Proj.’r^, FuunerAy (/iemens House, Danvillf Raiifoail 'Joficus Georgia Mailrond *-a:;;>- BAN KING ( 1 a SriffuifNTKxni-NTb Oi'i n r:, \ /~tOMMENt:lN'G Aomsti, G.a., Nov. .Mil. Ifou j SUNDAY, 7th instant beoperated. passenger schedule will , ho. 1 WEST—o.u l.Y. NO. 2 EAST—1>.\ ' l.Y. Lv. An 113 sta D:.'Ui a in Lv. Atlanta 7:1.1a " Mav TaHi am " Athens 0:17, a in " Mill o'll.sU’S a III “ < "wt'd'IM-.. :; pm ii\ “ W'-li't’u Pofvi 1.1 Ar Wash'g ".'a p ni f Ar.<"f'dv'!l I 2 ;.:i p m “ Milh■dg'IM-u. p in “Athens a yin p m “ ,Mae.,n u, j..i» •' V Atlanta .7:1.7 o m “ Augastn ;; : ;r p ui ?ro. 2 ivr.sf— iiaii.y. NO. f HAST— n.VIt.V. J.v. Augnsla 5:;5)i p m Lv. Ailant i X;t.7p,in Lv. Ur'Uv'll iV.72 p liil'.Vr. CTdv'il :t; 0 l a ui Ar. Atlanta .7:00 a in Ar. Augusta 7;i:i)a m Uw" No i rmneetion to or from Wasliine t«n on .NUNDAYS, S. K. JOHN.sox, L R. inik'T.Y, " .superintendent g . l’ass'ger Agent. Mnvg.tsro. ‘•c-i' ♦.-?n-wvi". Musical Homes Are liappy Gomes. Mate your homes musical, and ha,,pi ness will surely come. Nothing like Music to drive awav ci’ic and soothe tlic troubled breast, if you haven’t a ano 01 an Oigan. get 01 m. If) on have one already, get some new Music, and tunc up. 1 he best and cheapest way to get the Music is to subscribe to the Soktlirrn Musind Jmn-nr.l and let it visit you monthly through 1881. It will only cost $1.2,), and each monthly number to mmJLgJ&fSXSiSkJSl the Publishers. Ludden A Bates, Sa vannah, Ga., and they will mail you a specimen copy. — LANORETHS’ M us SEEDSSBEST If can not a get Portal sold them in Card your by m:t town, for il. data- Drop y loffu* GrHirers and Prices. I’nite'l The Oldest and most extensive Seed in the Staten. DAVI J> laANDRKTIl »fc HONH, PaiLAei.,PA, ocl.27,’8b.j-y. SAW A R KjEH ‘B >. ttZ 8 ■■ * A A <1 AT? 5 * EYL3V CURE Is made from a Simple Tropical Leaf of Bar -Value, tlir end is a i’OSITIt’i; Remedy for all diseases that cans’- pains in the lower part of tm Imdy—for Torpid Liver— Headaches—fa.mdiee—Dizziness, Malaria, and all difficulties Kidneys’. Gravel of the Liver, and Urinary Organs. For fttmaie Diseases. Pregnane;.-, Monthly Menstruations, and dur¬ ing it has no equal. It restore* the organs that make tin- Ui oil, a ml lu-i,oi¬ ls the best Blood Purifier. It i- t! 1 • only known remedy that cures Bright's Disease. For Cure. Diabetes, use Warner’ sale Diabetes For Sale hy all Druggists and Dealers at fuss per .bottle. Largest Pottle in tin market. Try it. II. IL WARNER ( y CO., Boclp.Ster. N. X. Nov.tO.’ttn.n-ni. At G. Myers, 4-4 She; : ing, se. a yard. All tiiose who have given it a (rial will not be, without it. It cures. Dr. Bull's Cough Syrup m- to . Dav: & Co,. GrecBcshoro' t.u. Vol. 5 . <•> si.mw: 21 *7, J ' lUJAiY °P- » n P<‘i live. U} .72 Address Mops. Damfi Pianos t. Beatty. Washington, N. J. V/ Sfri Catatef uc of SO p*r*t. conuunmg Prices de*cripf*«i« \u& of bstt ron'eitM of Plant* Knee*. Seeds. Kalin. etc. in cal tiv^tioo. a t Colored Plata of ojr W Double Wkltc It.,*. «ar4ta ’vtil t-a mailed upon rec«pt of * Sc. atam,, for poatacc. Special Fukk. De*cr;j>tire P rice-bit* of Ho*e* Goods caaranteed * first quality. 30 ^reenbousat ta S\\Z operation, liEliXER, fCkolmaale A Retail. it Louatille, Ky. “HOMES l.Y TEXAS. ?? IS THE TITLE OK A Newly Illustrated I'amplet - Descriptive . .. of .... the tary to the line of tip. country along and tribu ‘“ternattonal & Great Northern Railroad, and contains a good county man of the .State, ft also contains the names and «d dre-ses of Farmers and Haulers in Texas wln> have Farms for Sale or Unit, and those who will vvhnr Farm Hands fur next year. A copy of this hook will he mailed free Ui.theso who desire rvflahle in formation about Texas, upon application by h'Uer or'postal card to ALLEN Aict'OY, G*‘tt'l Freight and lWt Agt., Pffiestmi", * >'Xas. - -- ‘«-f— * —— OTriD/vC ninp ”AuC OC o, ma Dw, a > lUtauufacturers of s' Patent Portable Circular SAWMILLS Also Stationary Portatlo and / / OTCAU wICAIVI CkIPSyCO kNIlIrlkv / ** 6 N. SCHHOEDER ST., BALTIilOBE, MD. ihM wmmms® (^ond for ‘ Catalogue, I y. M 0 “i;ath;. the best paper, SIS - year of publication. The old .lefTer soiuau 1)-.mieratic Weekly, the 1! vxxint of Lhikrty. should lia taken',iu every Demo • «*“»»'*« in the rtiioii. 1 Jf ('OBTAINS AIL THE NEWS, t nly $1.00 Per Year. f u’vv'!v' 'O'V".‘ ! .rv.f 1"h. Aitk.N J y» W AolM) iu 6v<ny <M;n»fv. St-iul for .s.;in]>lt* copy fr»v. A'liiiv>>, BANNER OU LIBERTY, Ell-nvillc, t- 1 - w -rp a, p> rr Pa', • A r/sn v .'.' " .-I j j: 1. e'. > ,! »• '4,- "A 5 * 5 ^ , , | (v.^ss I i 4 !i ! ;"t ( 42 f y.4 ^ ! .. ......<> a ' <d '’..m gis rs. W e have been selling “ Swift's Syphilitic s .l"'c7fie “ Ini; years, and regard it far supe have known tVo never of a single failure. S. J. Casski.:., Tli«i.iasville.G*. j L. 1 . Greek A Go., Forsyth, Ga. Hunt, Rankin <V Lxmvu, Atlanta,Ga. Pemreuton, Samuels a rtnvNoims, At , liU,ta 1 ‘ Ailani 4 < . ... , , a, r n., July , , 1 , ts74. ""dof diseases for which it was recoin mended. Grant, Alkxaxdkk ,V Go. ’ 1.000 K ft .V A It It. Xt ill be paid to any chemist who will find on anaiysi of tnm hundred fatties of S. s. s.. <mid i*.nrt!**ls* of mercury, iodido potassium, ! THi'SypT^B;c(.MPANVPr„.i b Atlanta, ' pro rs, Ga. j Sohl'here kvlln B. s^mitl, rrk ‘ , " , •” j Hi nt Rankin * Lam\u Atlanta Ga, i Wholesale Agents, April’s,lH ’ I 7 ’J.j-v. 1,000 MlLFa TICKETS. i Gi;ov,fii \ Raii.iio.vi> Comi-any, Office GeSiirai. 1‘assknck.r Aoent. , Acoi sta, April .7th, i« 7 <i \ 1 ftOM.MENU t this Company ING will MONDAY, sell ONE 711, THOUs- last, . ■ AND .MILE TICKETS, good over main I T&'. DOMzAKS (P.eh. iJicsc TWENTY-FIVE issiu*<l ticlc(*ts Will !>*> to infliviflunis. firius or families, but not to firms ami lamilics combined. e. n, iK>nsEY, ' , MayO l«79. „ General Passenger Atrent. t If you are a muiiMM jf you are a of DUAinfcas.weai;- man of lot ened by the strain of Hr tcra toiling < ovorxmu your duties avoid f nibfht work, to res¬ stimulant a and ubq tore brain nerve and Hop Bitters. warfte, u-se Hop If you are youm? and Kj suffering from any u In rSed discretion single, or dissipa old B tiou ; ; if if you are mar healtn or lang or h voung, suif bed ling from poor ruly or . >ng on a of eicit nes-x, Vvboo"er on Hop Bitte’ 11 , s. and* die whenever youar”, ftt-| §M it ntxali an tiiat you system MLj form of , r 1C on .some needs your cleansing,U>n-«BpAdis-iso that » cj n e y Lug gttnmiating. MR ; Im-vo bf-enpretenkd might or without intoxicating, am 1 by a iimci y tineot Bitter H ? P K ° pBiUerS 8 pepsin, kidney *?*** ■ * ■ D. i. C. plaint, or urinary disease com¬ nn absolute liver bctuxls, of the slfjmach, blood, 7 .5, i HOP UU l |{dnir*kenne g-;,Vj r .. s v.;> » or nerves gjuse of opium, , You vi 11 be HI gjtobacco, or u'tre'J if youuBC coiica. Hop Citters - ply If you weak e re sim¬ and J, 3 . NtVtR Mr/PD I llr^^SS ■ lowsr>ira.. i ,try Circular. it! 8 av I t e y may o u r '! I CA l I L I 11 H0P Br *TKBg life, ed it hun- hae lA j! if, * rc co„ sav "o-Aetrr, X. Y, drecis. Vq ------ -—HI It 1 '.*,**., One At r. Myers. (, ni.’- Thd from 50<-. to 1 S:-.50 f Ladies’ Fancy TU-. at 2.7 r-t U. MYERS', I-'" It - oi • - sir aped to Craw fonlt« :•■. M: .eys. I ..j-.-i !»<■•.,t, Woodvilie, ot J.V " ;V : , ! < ...... !:.,. <; 'p '■> 1 v ‘u * ' A. \ tU: DAN uxviT\ Isi A- "iV ( n.. ]y r'.rtrtU ro , (.a, litat show- who .-eils „ -u L ■ rn I democrat ie ■ CRAIVFORDYILLE, GEORGIA, FEBRUARY 1881. I*0Ct IT. _ OX ft Gl. ASS MOKE, Stay, mortal, stay 1 nor heedless thin Thv sure destruction seal; Within tiiat cup there larks a curse Which all who drink must feel. _ Disease and Death, forever nigli, Stand rea dy* at the disir, R And eager vr-a it to hear the cry Of “Give me one glass morel” Co, view that prison's gloomy cells, „ * Their pallid tenants scan. Gaze, gaze upon these earthly hells, And ask how they began. i , Had those a tongue, O man ! thy elieak ■rr* The tale would crimson o'er; Had these a tongue, to thee they'< And answer, “One glass more," llehold that wretehed female form, An outcast from her home, . Bleiiehed in Affection'* blighting storm,’”’ And doomed in want to roam • Beheld her ! Ask that prattler dear ^lie’ll Why mother i, .so poor; 1 fwas whisper father’s in thy startled car, " one glass more.” Stay, mortal, stay tliy i repent, return; e Ilcilect upon fate; | The poisonous draught, indignant spurtr; Spurn, spurn it, vre too late. •11;' fly the ale-house's horrid din, I best' Nor thou, linger perclmnee, near the door, should sip again | - The treacherous “One glass mote.'’ ^ . Miscellaneous. mm Cutting a Boy 'a Hair. T 1 |There is no. in fooling use arofitid £]\ ,q burrs and feaihers it H limy to . .... 1 j ■ '.Thc’boy (loeMiTr'i'i'iVnid* ,f cifeinrh * ‘ lmir * r to 1 Stl atntf " a a sofa 8 1,1 l* mlh.vr ,,,ow * Tl * .e *‘Htst bo coerced, and kind words and. bread promises are thrown away, Ober ciffn is the only tnPlhod. I ut T;7 ci. inert, is ■' no MM11 appeid - U \ mm dyy -nKle- * Pfy. et.sion. XVheu 1 come out 'Gfry my point or dio'try'mg.' 4 .%v i <>U 1 1 in.m.you tun get hate your luur ctiL” “Next woe I; ‘‘No, sir—now !” 1 ivitil a buz/saw ?“ ‘‘Yes, if the shears won’t do it.” “'Vmi^t you draw blood ?•’ u l may h^vu to.” “Wi-ou won’t cut tnv hair 111 bring ittl(J l won’t ttsk for a light what. I go pp,| H: ' . l * 00 " 10 ° , ' t ,ipl ' e ^' iy I lies er t)ike any chances on a boy. 1 have an old chair bolted to the floor I 5*olt llit boy to . .. tho chair. . . I hx lum so tlmt he can move neither hand nor foot, put a soft-gag in bis ,z irjoiitl, to lire vent stir neiL'lihorlmo.l ihrm **»■« w. *.'.«. minutes’hard work with a currycomb, ir he hasn’t Been mnnimr I,.,,,. two or three years '* this ' toofwill lie found f sufhcient . , rake the to , out s .arls, , buttons and articles j reviou.slv mentioned A ,Wsket ^ ^ tor tlK'in to drop into, and they can be dec ,u ' al< '' 1 " ill ‘ pictures and made to sm ' e a# parlor oniaments. When a boy’s hair is ready for the shears ltrace your feet and shear away. ; Slicin' front, back, lop and side without reference lo lines or angles. The ob J*ct ... is to remove hair. There is no u. e of any conversation, not even when the slleil,s , hud . of and refuse a pmee wire to - cut it. The boy wouldn’t know how it . , . .. ^ iCle , , hjjjj, , iIo bus bad J i bis head in closets, cellars, tzarrets barns, fence corners, barrels, boxes, ai d . all sorts of nooks, and such extra a -. tachments arc no surprise to him. No one should be less than half an hour lobbing an average boy of bis ca p.llary substance. Any attempt to hur¬ ry the job will result in overlooking a lot of shingle nails, the missing Bcrevr driver, or something whic'.i may damage - his Sunday hat. My average time is thiity-live minutes, and I have only two minutes left after being able to see that tie lias a se tip. It I hen takes ten addi¬ tional minutes to look him over and identity him as the same boy I began on. His neck has grown longer, the size of his ears increased, and the whole shape of the head is altered. \\ lien I am, Sure that it is my boy, and not the son if some neighbor who has skulked on tue, brush him o't with an old broom, crack bis head three or four times, draw the bolts am] remove the * 1 1 j ; J then hold Ihe door oj>en for hhn lo U,( ‘ bl4ck 1 iivn a loving father in all dw. but v/be.n f C A b y S ll; ‘ ir ^"'’‘Ktcni old Koman oi ,rai the - « first r water.—.!/ (hnd. *ggS£|L'» r - w * Cavat.ag’t, v.riUs : For mak dig x oT‘aflMIBRAK'rtiiUvrecmiimeii.1 nna want f'L»^pr Gold e I r , Jprtij i Extract «f lh, Sold DfTflWWsinitlL ( : 'ri Diagg. t. Know My Son Bill. As the overland express was through Alenxda, on its way to Xnv Yotk, the engineer suddenly whistled down brakes, the conductor frantically shouted and jerked the signal line, and with many a jar and squeak the long lino of ears was brought to a stop. The cause of this sudden fetch-up was a fat old lady, with a red face and a green parasol, who hud planted herself ^sqimreiv in front of the engine, and was making the most frantic signals for it to - “What's the matter? Anything on | the track ?“ said the engineer, excited ; *)'• i “Nothing but me.” said the old lady I stithy. i “Has there been a smash-up V” Is • there—there a drawbridge open ?” “Don’t poke fun at me, young man. I i want to see tlie proprietor,” i “The what?” ! “The lmti. who runs this tiling; the captain, or whatever von call him.” “\\ hat do you want with the coiidoc ! I' 11 ' ■ " 1 “None of your business. 1 want to S( ‘ e the head mail- the boss and to ( ^ OJK • “Well, ina’ani,” said that functnnm ■ vy, running up, watch in hand, “tvhat's up? What can l do for you ?” j ! "Yougo through Chiwtjro, don’t you?” ‘ Why of course. Wha'. of it ?” ; “You know lay son 15111-Bill dersou—there ?” ! “No. For heaven's sake, get off the i track, you 1 old ” “Don't sass me you red-nosed gorilla, ° r iufolln 1111 y° u ' I'estry me, | ' ! rascal. Don't dure t-« teeh me. I'll move when I'm good and ready.*” “Hell, blank your bUnknation tyrs, hurry up ! What do you want ?” ,,,,,, . . day or two at Chicago and look up Bill, , atttl teH llln , Ul( . liulu M uri«h June's ki , u ,er work mend into Ills, . and there’s more hopes. She's sorter.— “Star! her up, Jitnie,” yelled (lie foil ; on* conductor;and if the old lady hadn’t ; hustled up her skirts and humped self she would have had a first-cl ss case : of Uamagusagaiest the nompHiiy. After , that she stood apoplectic with rage slink ing her parasol at tlie disappearing train, . , t ,tl "/'''"T’"*, ' l ;* Ul1 "je - 'ery •*«» minute Jhrauns--> U,e Font. dishes were wash — —«- - Little Jakie Jones. ( «'l Mrs. Jones borrowed Mrs. Brown's recipe 1 for mak ng " watermelon picked ' the ‘ J ’ ana ,H,l,g . of '““"‘"L . . , “ hl,e , eo,,lll "’ t ■« to lei « l wry well, lilw got 1)tr Brand son, Jakie, to »» ; <,lW;la : -•«*•» •» suit: down commenced . “Take a green watermelon ” "Why, Jakie, ain’t you mistaken ? I f tliomdit 1 1 tho 1 B melon lllel °" inmt ,nl,st be l M ine 1 ®- ” j | what s* Iho maLlrr will yevr ? ™ ™ » wntermelon that wuan’t i ,e<,, ! 5* ‘ ' “Cut the watermelon into four halves—” “But there ain't only two halves to anything. I don’t believe ton are icad is»^ r that, .Jakit*.“’ wind the l^t TUusZ R in a 1 " ,,t c,, l' ! “Oil, dear me! How in tie world can you put a watermelon in a pint ( , ||[) “ ll'ell I ain’t be re to tell the where- i ascs and liowforcs. i am just leadin’ j the facts ami you can pul iu the lilosf.c lo suit your I axle. After soakin’ the melon, put it in a skillet and fry it fur hye Jays, "1 wuu.ler if Mrs i'rown sent me such i that?” said the old lady j , * ll ‘"-' l ,e a! * ; but Jakie kept on : “Then put the watermelon in a quart and pour over it a gallon of vinegar taking care not to spill the vinegar—” I “I'il just like to know bow you can pour a gallon into a quart bowl without spilling any of i*but Jakie coat in tied: “Then sift a peck of red pepper (Proiigli a milk strainer over the melon, | and to one cup of butter and the white j and yolkes ami shells of three eggs, and throw in the old hen Unit hml them, and four sticks of cinnamon drops and two tablcspmmsful of quinine and run it through a roiliee-mill and let it stand till it ferments, arid then put it in a tin can a,ld {lv th,: M to tiiis will stir it nn lo tbe right consistency and then you can turn it off in crocks and have it ready for use. Serve it cold ami spread it on mince pie and it makes a capital r^esert,” ami Jakie flow out the door ' and left tho old lady looking like a wrinkle on a monument, IJttriut F.-e Tms, No. 8. His Mouth Saved Hita. . “John Hall, you were yery drunk last night,” said his Honor, as a send-off. “I think not, sir.” “Well, you have a right lo differ, Ollicer, was this man drunk V” “He was, sir.” 1 “How drunk V” 1 j "Well, he fell down four times jt , I crossing the road, and the last tiuie lie fell he settled down for a nap.” "That's our case, Mr. Hall. Have you any defense ?” “1 have, sir. I had not tasted any liquor of any sort all day long. Just ; before 1 met tliu officer I got choked, i and that was what ailed me when lie picked me tip.” “Choked ' Wlmt with V” “With an apple.” “Have you got it ?,' “Yes, sir. When the officer shook mo lie sbo k the apple out of tnv gullet and l.p'it it hi uiv pocket to bring and show you.” lie theruij on pulled from his coattail j pocket a frozen greening larges’ than a | coffee-cup and laid it on the deck. j “Do you mean to tell me that you had that apple in your tnoulh ?’’ | 1 'Yes, sir. 1 was going to take a bite !t down into my gullet, i Ahd if tlic ofllcti l.adn't given me a I Shake I might Itr.v? s'uffwiited,” 1 “Y'oii can't get the apple into your j month! No such M.,rr ‘ will go dome here.” “See here, Judge.'' and he opened a niouth big enough lo take in u quart, l.oxxl tossed in tho apple, tattled it ! ; around and dropped it into his hand [ ; »jT****i wlllt a »tnil« of trittinph. » , ' :l " ' ai n in any prison. Take your fro¬ 1 zen apple and go your wav.” ‘ Thank yon. I'd like to bring my brother in someday and let you see bis mouth. He cun bold a pint of hickory- j nuts and sing a Ming at the same time.” Xiv York I!mbl. i The Woodon Hat. I Som»wlure ubmit the y ar 17.su, a traveling millwright, loot-sore and with ! tho liroad.st Northern Doric accent, slopped at 'oho, at tint engine factory j of Boulton ,V Watt, ami asked for work. His aspect was litlle belter tlian one of j beggary and poor looks, and Boulton I had tiddi n him tied speed to some other when as he .vrsturunuawayspr l.aek “ What kind of if flat » yon ye hav* on your head me tium ?” “It’s j.rat limmer sir.” “Pimmer ’ iiia iiwh • !<•”. * look at if l ' " l,e ' (: <!»l you get ... it ' “I just tnadn it, sir, tny iilniol.” t., *' lnn 1 ........... " it ¥ „ 1 ll 1,1 111 tlic lat Ine. . ;r- iMr " ....." “A wool ! I just g.trid the latbie gang anither gait, to please me. I’.l n lang afore me, and I thocht to have j a hat to keep out water, and 1 hadna’ , n ...... | 1 ««•’ By his inborn men ban ism t lie man had invented an oval lathe and made lii.s hat, and tli» hat made lii.s fortune. Boulton was not the man to lose so val¬ uable a help, thus the ’after'-famous William Murdock the originator of lo *« '* ! ■ ’’ ’ ZliZZ ' ' ' ' 1,1 \ i ni i 1 \T v, ''- v ! ’ l , * ,,,ls ”* ^a.n-c.mnmg that had pro din 1 ed the “timiner ha*,”—Am ri- in • Miinhlntet. ' 1 The Hero and tho Dog. A dozen men were watering their throats in a Monroe avenue saloon yes¬ terday, when two strangers enti led and one of them raised fiis voice and called ouL: “Gentlemen, allow me to introduce ! te you, Gapt. Green, of ( lik-ago, tl.w ; hero wlm was locked up in a room with ■ a dog for two long hours, aimed only with a piece of lath.” Sever.sal persons at once stepped for ward and shook liamlv ami invited C apt. Green to iliink. He had imhiheil tln-e glasses of later and got two cigars <n his pocket, wlicn one of the im-n queried: “You must have felt purty skeary V" •‘Yes,” “Was tin* do" mad V” k ‘i don't tlonk be was.” “And you Rent |,jui off with the lath ?” “Yes.” “Well, I don't want am of that. - Locked in were )on “Yes.” “Couldn’t have got out if the dog had been too much for you ?“ “No.” •'•Well, yon were a hero, and that's a fact. What breed of a dog was it ”” I think they culled it a poodit,” qui- Fhe Democrat. AI>V kkTi»i\<; kvils ; One Square, first insertion S i6 One Square,earli subsequent inst-HJnh, ss One Square, tUree mouth* . tw One Square, twelve months . a rat Quarter Column, twelve months . . 2 j tut Half Column tvo-hmi •ntlia . w oft One Column twelve months . •to CN) One Inch or la-sr considered as A square. \V« lutve iw> fractions of a square, - n fractions of squares will be counted as squares. Liberal dediictions made on Cons tract Advertising. ctly replied the hero, as he slid for the , ' ,>or The crowd slid after him, hut the first man outdoors always lias the best slinw 'Kg to use bis legs, —D troll Free I'r><*. Stringy Cabbage. George was extravagantly fond of «°'<1 caldiage, and one day, seeing quite s after dinner, asked his wife to Suva it for salid at niglit. About midnight Georgs came lu*mr, laboring under a stress of heavy weatb tr ' Vet ‘ linz '"'"Sri, and thinking of llis f * vo,i -« cabbage, be asked where it was. llis wife replied, ‘In the pantry, 01 * the second shelf.’ Down Im went, found ttie cabbage, got out the oil, mustard un«l vinegar, cut up the cabbage, dressed it to his Hml ,lle il aU ' ltt the morning liia wife noticed the 1>liite ,,f ' vll0re »he bad put it j the day before, and turning to her ‘Dear Innocently asked why he did not eat his cahnage. “1 did," lie said. “How did you like it ?” “O.i ! ted very well, it was tough anti-' r, «ut It Pie is the cabbage now, where you lind any more f “ Wl, y °" tl,e ,v,| ero you ,,U! ’ ' A «l«i«*c look at the shelf by the wife and then a cry of agony. “Why, George, you have eaten $20 worth of lace collars ami owftV that I* had pul in starch ; slringv cabbage, j„ deed !” American Manners. vv Uye ’(.'enter—A. toper's nose. No head nor tail to it—A circle. Long division Separation for life. ,ln unvarnished tail—The monkey's. Beauty w in; love hut ueutness keeps jt, The linker always- 1ms his hour of knead. An expensive wife makes a pensivs* intslminl. If a row of columns Isa oolonaile, isn't a tow of lemons a lenioimda ?' Some witty follow 1 we forget who, said I can tell dogwood by i!» bark. The best of us are very apt to be mea¬ ly-mouthed aliotit three times a day. To get truth by telephone it is neces¬ sary to have a good man at th« other end of the lino. Joseph gave Phillis an onyx ring where¬ upon she remarked that the gift was en¬ tirely onyx looted, A man never looks so much like a red handed villain us when he is told hy. a photographer to “look pleasant. When you my that a gill’s hair Is black as coal, it is just as wwll lo specify tlmt you do not mean a red hot coal. “Massa, one oh your oxon is dead; todor, too. raid to toll yon oblaiff at at ones, for fear you couldn't hortu it.”' He who has ridden in H'conntry stage cottch knows how cream feels whonit is being elutrntsl into butter. Boston Tr an- script.. A man writes to an editor for $1 “bo-- enusii he is so terribly short,'.' .im. 1 gets in reply tlie lnsn I less response.. “Do as L do; stand up on a cha>r.” " c<! >“ ««»!«'•.* place of amusement on a ticket reading “Ail wit cm*.” “H'ltal is meant by the power behind the throne ?” askelHhs teacher. “The ace.” replied the smart, bad lw>y “wtiicli is greHter than the king.” I*. S.—Tlio 8 ' s L.y*si in after school. — llmrk ei/r. Mr. Ever was niariied to Miss Joy.. Hie friends of the victims wore shocked! when the press called her “a tiling of beauty,’* l/ocn.ise she was “t Joy for¬ Ever.’' P.tncfi gives (lie following as an ex¬ ample of selfisacrifice: Boy (to lady visitor) —"Teacber; there's a gal over there a winkin’ at me!” Te»ch»r—• * AVelJ, then, don’t look at jivr. ” )’oy “But, if I don't look at lier, slie’lli ivuk at som.'lnaly else !” The young milkman and liis girl stood before the justice of the peace. “You take ibis milk — ahem ! this man foiy hotter t>r for worse ?” the mighty man, of llu ' ,i '" r inquired. The girl said it never-s-enrd to her before, she supposed; >he would if that was the only whey. A young lady in Primghar, J/innesso ta. who was made a convert to the Jiav» t ist faith, was led to the chilly waters of (be Waterman to ire baptized just after tin- holidays. The water bad scarcely moistened her stockings In-fore she new ously snatched hei hand from that of the eider who was leading her and exclaim ed; ■'It's too cold: IT, Y(.»it till gpring,”
