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THE GAZETTE: T1FT0N, GA., FRIDAY, JULY 5, 18U5.
A TALK OF uoxcmmos.
SSb
FARMER a:.
;ter.
— Life.
An Unexpected Obutucte.
Lover (In whisper 'neatli window)—
Are you ready to lower yourself down,
darling?
Isabel E. Loper—Quite ready.
Lover—Have you got everything?
Isabel EL Loper—Yes; everything but
papa's pocketboolc; I oouUln’t find it
anywhere.
Lover (dejectedly)—Alas! for obvious
reasons we shall be obliged, to post
pone our departure.—ltoston Courier.
Mature.
Aunt Philldu—The lust time 1 went
to a grown-up fancy ball 1 went ns a
wasp. That wns only ten years ugo. 1
don't suppose 1 shall ever again go to a
fancy ball as a wasp.
Mary—Hardly as a wasp, Aunt Phil-
Ida. But you’d look very splendid us a
bumble bee.—Punch.
"DIVERSIF ICA I ION,"
A. Oppo.ed to "Putting All the Ess. into
One Hs.Url,"
"Save the middleman** profit on
that which you have to sell and on
that which you hate to buy. Produce
everything possible needed for home
use. Someone make- li e profit off
you both ways If you grow something
to sell to pay for that which you must
buy. There is nothing you can buy
as cheaply as you can grow It If you
•an grow It at all."—Editorial In April'
number of Farmers' Magazine.
The gospel of diversification * as
quoted above and as 1 preached by our
worthy editor is us true ns Holy Writ
For years wo have been an "ultra,"
diversiflcatlonlst, going ns far In that
line as my rope would let me. We have
lived in a "special lutlc" time and In a
specialists country: have both seen
and felt tile evil and pernicious effects
of "specialties" when curried to the ex
tent of “putting all the eggs luto one
basket" Had we lived in a time and
country where “ultra” diversification
was the universal practice wo would
probably have been found advocating
specialties. We are no believer in
“extremes," either way, ami the rea
son of our "ultra" tendencies Is
because the exegeneies of the
r&rifToT thb Jt'.ft ?. «-/-*!K unknown.
According to the Fimijiciul Chronl- : A
cle's cstlmulesT-based mi reports from ; fit.-
several liuufiredcurre. pmi<lentsfroiiias ! ,,vli> • i t
many different points—this year's cot- j among
ton crop acreage is UK percent, below poo;|!ool.l:'
last year's. The total acreuge is : solemn gun
placed at 17.707,11118 seies. or nearly ’ bis privat
V,850,00(1 less than We bad last year.
This Is llie smallest intlon acreage
the country lias Liu) sim-e 18-1.
f i.
Ji*:
1
' '-..V.'.t, or funeral
r l.uiy prefer, ail*
r i\>r a hearse, and
ants he selected a
..tf fellow, with a
v. ami took him into
TOO SMALL TO nWtWfe.
JCm
The CI W
Carolina l.i
l.ilh
‘ I * •
I.
that North
•• i»i ••wire us
i i. * 4 -ITS.*
S‘ i» pro*
»i 1 tl.r »***iton
!»!•*,' It lid III*
• u> entire
. • \< olHced
• « 11 per
• pr> mIucvi*,
I > • "f 13; mid
a- a rot toil
•u. l lnrhla’a
•cot , hnt her
U 't.nv e.Apl>\vm*r
derta :er. “I w.i;u . • •
laid ex r K*:ien»*e in t'ii v
“Will, 1 uev. »•
ml tied the applicant
Vv>.C kM the un-
\n nv If you have
l ..sines*?"
• va. a hearse," u<l-
hut I’ve drove
flfti i.ere*- In r« t
3uees ii.*m. I v ii • I ' ,.f
?v 'iMi iii i i> l i - • -
in *st a r *. i .. x
;roj». II r I'. n. *
it !t,0S2,).10 urn *, a .•, *.•
cent. Our lieu
(leorpia, rri ni ls a m n*
Mississippi, in*\( in
producer, one of in pci
reduction 1* only .1 ».,
eottou uct enirc 1* n«*v«*r In l e
ather slate shows it <K a>r
than 0 per cent.: unit nuo every terrl
lory except Oklahoma.
Missouri's reduction is osOntt'rd to
l>e 20 |Msr cent.: Arl.iin n ■ *. 12, mid
Tennessee's, 9 per rent. M ssouri'a
crop ia reported to i«« i> ckwurd. "but
a good tlutiil Iiiik teen secured nud i size lu the
fields nre clear of weeds tin I £ mss." i People.
The reports on Texan, Arkausns Okla*
the ue.\l tlitip* lo It, and l guess l can
give yon satisfaction."
“now do you tuven? I don't under* *
stand," and It war. evident from the ' .9 '""***'
undertaker's troubled look that ho was j j
speaking the truth. ■ J
“Why," said the applicant with eoufi* j *
donee, “I drove a rapid delivery wagon A
In Philadelphia for seven years." ^
Ho got the job,—X. Y. Sun.
\ Ml limp- Album Grujjmphrr.
Nobody can deny that ]sistage*stamp
collecting is n great help in teaching
I‘.very o - ,
{ not less 1 boys geography. Jack showed this at
school when his teacher asked him
whore Nicaragua was and what It pro
duced ch icily.
“It’s on page nln 'ty*clgU|," said
Jack, “uiul It produces more seta o'
stamps than onv other country of its
world."- Harper's Young
|j Johnnie (surveying his small piece 01
rplel—I'm blame glad I’m not twins.
Mamma—Why?
Johnnie—’Cause there's not enough
-pie eveu for half a twin.—Judge.
times and the obsliiiucy and homu. Imlhtii terrii*» , . , v. Tennessee mid
blindness of those who adhere to j Mississippi are sa'S-'iielnry. In all |
the “single-crop" policy (ru 1 noufc and j that section the crop is Inic, Iml look- I
suicidal though It be) has hitherto | ing well, and in fact reports generally
forced us In this direction. What are , sre now favorable,
commonly known Ss "cash" crops, so] Tin* outlook, both ns lo prices and
called for the reason that one can rent-i 1° yield froiir the ticie»i"v pin tiled, is i
ize.actual cash (ut some price or oilier) 1 certainly promising. IVices are now |
on them at any desired period of time, 1 np and are not likely to decline much
are “good servants," hnt “bud mas- jH any. A big crop from (lie present j
tors;" they have, in almost every in- tmreage will not put them dow i very ' I*'ree Press,
stance, proved to U* both a ‘blessing" • f* 1 **, while ii short erop is iiIiiionI ecr*
and a “cursp;" an innnlxed blessing j to send them sky ward. —SL Louis
whenever the soil tiller exercises a Kepnblle.
due and judicious control over them, | iloTFinir*
hut an um,.lll K aU*,l cart,- whenever ! Tl.la Ik a mnM val, ,,i i,'- b.r bn*.,
and wherever he nlluwa himself lo he !liml , ovv , Si j,
luropean be |>lun(.-,l Mm • <> .1 illy,
in row* three feet x|iur(j divip'ilnjf tlm
teed about a foot apart in the row.
Tile, precaution of Koal^lug tho seed
from one lo throe day* before plant
ing Is neuesaary lo seenre a c n ‘Ml
stand, lint after I lie sou It i nc they
should be planled dm in • n dry spell.
Tbe aoil should he m.dst when tha
Hepmltnled.
"Hoi"
The form of the younjf ami beautiful
girl was drawn up lo lit full hel^lit,
and, qulverln;' with ra.ro, she [Hiintisl
to the door. •'You told me It would 1st—"
With a eoniuiaruling' . Lere she hand
ed him bark the rin^ in, bud just ten
dered her—
“—at, least throe earnt.n."—Detroit
There Wo. Another Way.
A oonjtiror was recently performing
the old trick of produelu^ eggn from a
' pocket handkerchief, when he re
marked to a little )>oy in fui>:
"I say, my boy, your mother can't|f«t.
i j effRS without hens, can she?"
“Of course she can,” replied the boy..
“Why, how la that?” asked the con
juror.
"Sho keeps dunks," replied the boy,,
amid roars of laughter.—KIchmouA
State.
them. In bur humble
Experienced Iteaeonlug.
Milllcent — Here comes that horrid
Mias Smith! I am sure she will stop
and talk to us,
Lillian—Oh, I don't think she will, my
dear.
Milllcent—Why?
Lillian-Because she hasn't anything
new on.—Brooklyn Fugle,
Would Make Assurance Doubly Sure.
Freddy—I told Mr. Lovemnn that you
said you were going to hiss him next
time he came to the house.
Maud—Yon horrid boy. What did lie
say?
Freddy—Suld he wouldn't believe It
till he had It from your own lips.—
Truth.
Be Meant Well.
Certainly—Now, sir, what do you
mean by telling people that I bud a
reputation as a barroom fighter? 1 have
been a most perfect foe of the rum-
shops for years.
"Yes. That Is what I said."—In-
dlanapolls Journal
An Alternntlve.
“When a man's clothes are too loose,"
•ays the Manayunk philosopher, "there
are two ways of remedying .the evil.
One la to take them back to the tailor.
Another Is to get a new boarding
house.”—Philadelphia Record.
HU BID.
Box—Mr. Dunn called to see about
that bill of his.
Mr. Short—Well, if he oomea in again,
tell ldm his bill la In a good state of
preservation, and Is likely to reach a
good old age.—Boston Transcript.
Contrary to Common Custom.
Kitty—Do you think It is nice for
people to go on calling each other
"dear" and "dearie” after they are
married?
Tom—It may be nice, but It Isn't con
ventional.—Brooklyn Life.
How to Olvo Often...
He—I hear you attend the Handel
•aQi Haydn performances. Were you
present at the "Creatlou?”
She (Indignantly)—I suppose you will
next want to know If I sailed In Noah’s
ark?—Boston Beacon.
Hardly.
Friend—And do yon belong to thg
Realistic School of Writers?
Author (despondently)—I guess not.
I have never been able to realize on
any of the stuff I've written.—l’ock.
His Kind.
-• Hills—Are you superstitions?
Mills—Yes. I believe In signs. If thst
Is what you mean.
Hills—Which ones?
Mills—The hind.—N. Y. World.
A Bofiettlon.
“You're all the world to me/* be cried.
And ahe. with vaotle nilrtu
And tenderness aald. ‘Haw j. u told
Pap* you want the eerth*''
Washington 4tar
controled by
opinion, the land was given us by an
all-wise and beiieUcoiil Creator to make
a living on. “He that lilletli the soil
shall hftvc plenty of (money? No, but)
bread." This Is the Divine deeree; ami
from it there is no swerving. If one
blunts cotton, hemp, flax, ramie, to-
jucco, sugar Wet, sugar cane, hops, or
even fruits of any or all kinds to the
utter axelusion of the strictly “provi
sion crops," is subverting thevdivlne
order; there is no promise to him, nor
comfort for him in the above quota
tion. “Bread" is the “staff of life,"
and should receive puramouut uon.sid*
eration. By all means let us try to
make our farmsself-sustnIning, and by
so doing we will become self-dcpond-
ent, self-reliant, Independent of
the middleman and the rail
roads to a great extent, and
prosperity is bound .to -follow.
The greatest drawback the American
farmer has to contend with inuv be
summed up In a word of four letters—
that word is debt. All debts are self-
imposed, entered Into voluntarily and
of their own free will and volition by
everyone who contracts them. The
best way out for those who nre in debt
Is to “pay out," and the first step to
ward paying out Is to practice economy,
■elf-denial, industry, perseverance, and
to so diversify as to make the farm as
nearly self-sustaining as possible, and
avoid all specialties unless you fully
understand the specialty. — G. H.
Turner, in Farmer!*' Magazine.
Tho Socrot Wiih Snfo.
"Why ilkl you mill In French to
Ethel las! night?"
"Because I bail something to Impart
to her that 1 wished no one else to
know." .■ i
"But tlieru was a French lady sitting
close behind you.”
"Yes, but I have since discovered
that she didn’t understand a word wo
suld."—Tumiminy Times.
The HlfTcrrnra. .
Judge—How long bus this difference*
between you and your wlfo-oxlsled?
(I'Mnlly— lvvor senco wo was married,
yer minor, ori'y It's changed a throttle
since thin.
Judge—'What do you meun by saying
the dliVorcnro lias changed?
O'Mally—At furrest 01 cud lick bur,
hut. Nonce Oi had tbe rhemuatlz,
wurral she's the best mini uv the two.
—Truth.
COTTON PROSPECTS.
A Few
VoeauMWeTeoibr.
“Some women can't believe s word
their husband, say,” she remarked.
"Well," confided tho other, 'Tm'hot
lulte so badly off a* that. My hatband
talks (n his sleep occasionally.'*'-Wash
ington Star.
Worde of t'onxretuleHoii to the
Cotton (i rower.
Cotton planters are to bo congratu
lated on the prospects of a good crop
this year, and much better prices llutti
they received for a considerable por
tion of last yeur’serop. The bcurisli
feeling in the market at present is due
to a marked improvement In the con
dition of the cotton Helds of the south.
In most sections the crop Is lute, but
comparatively little damage Is report
ed frosla, worms, washouts, rains, dry
weather or other cause The effect of
favorable crop reports on the market
may put prices down some, hut they
are not likely to stay down even with
continued favorable reports.
There are two reasons for believing
that the market will not return to the
prices of four or five mouths ago. One
Is based on the increased activity of
the cotton mills on both sides of the
Atlantic. The demand in Europe for
cotton Is strong and it Is likely to con
tinue so throughout the year. On this
side every mill Is running and has or
ders ahead to keep itgolrfg for months.
This Is very different from the situa
tion last summer. For several weeks
the mills of two of the principal cot
ton manufacturing cities of New En
gland were closed ou account of a
strike. All summer long tho country
suffered from business depression and
good prices were out of the question.
With the restoration of confidence
came orders to replenish depleted
stocks aud the cotton nmrkct has ad
vanced nearly fifty per cent In conse
quence.
With a continuance of general busi
ness prosperity both here and In Eu
rope, the nnlv thing likely to put the
market down very mucli would be au
enormous crop of new cotton. There Is
good ground for belle ring that this
year’s cotton crop will he the lightest
in several years. Even should the
yield per acre be as large as It was last
year, the country's total*production
would be fully 10 per cent, less than
the erop of lfBt-05. 'Ibis fact alone
should tend lo keep the. market up,
narticnlailx at this tfensum when lilt*
[seed arc put In. About Iwo hundred
pounds of any good tertllizcr will lie
sufficient for an acre. The plants
when the first appear tilsivc tbe
ground, look I Ike course nut grass. Two
plowlngs, and the Mime number of
iioelngs, will generally !«• Milllclont to
keep down any weeds and grass, and
In about two mmitltH Ike ground will
| bo covered with Dm rank green tops,
which arc excellent fund for cattle
and horses. The crop malmvs Ip about
; three montlis, and bogs Hum turned
In will futlen with surprising rapid!-
' ty. It is the plan of an old farmer, In
stead of digging and saving his seed,
to throw two furrows of earth in the
bod before cold weather sets in. lie
says 1m has found tlml lids will pro
tect them perfectly until spring. A
half bushel of semi will plant about
an acre. — Southern Cultivator.
Onn W»y to Kid l'<tourr of Vermin.
I will lull you How I completely
eradicated the biggest erop of lieu of
the large kind I ever saw on a lot of
fowls, says a writer In the Poultry
Keeper. I took a pound of smoking
tobacco and put It In a lifty-pound Inrd
| tub, poured on aboultivo<|iiarts of hot
water, covered It up and let It stand,
over night. The next day luring a
warm ont, I filled up the tub within s
few inches of the top with warm wa
ter; then 1 took each fowl singly and
dipped them In the soup up to
where they part their hack hair,
or. to be exact, up to their eyes, letting
them get thoroughly soaked with It,
then lifted them out and let them
drain. I served every one the same,
and 1 can say that I completely
cleaned out the lice and did not hurt
my fowls In tho least. They all did
well after It, and at present have not
got a louse of any kind whatever on
them. The pound of tobacco was suf
ficient for sixty fowls, the number I
dipped. 1 filled the tub up with warm
water the second time after I hud
dipped about thirty of them.
(U'Ulm; lltit'k.
“If 1 \vi*rc a woman/’ said Mr. Jones,
as lie pulled on Ids slippers, “I’ll be
hanged if I’d go ’round with bicycle
bloomers on my legs."
“Well," snapped Mrs. Jones, “If I
were a man I wouldn’t go round with
a whjslty bloomer on my nose, either,
So there!’’—N. Y. Recorder.
Ho llad u .Motive.
Eye witness—Bravo, my friend! You
huvo exerted your utmost strength to
save |>« mii* RoHciihlcin from a watery
grave.
Mandl—And for u good reason. He
owes me fifty marks.— Sehloslsshe Zcl*
tung.
X Kacwd^omlnfi.
“No, Mrs. Lukcfront; I have no In
tention of getting u divorce this year."
“Why, Mrs. Wabash! What has oc-
A ruiirr.
“Why," asked Urn philosopher, “why
Is it that a imtn—the noblest created
object—why l* it that a mail should
have doubts of his ability lo win a
woman’s direct ion, when ho considers
the success lu that line of a p<>i»-cycit r
pudding-shaped, pretzel-tailed pug
dug?"
But (lie assembled Its,(aners upsirercA
him not.—Toledo Blade,
I'lalilng Tsekla.
The daughter was going over her-
fatlior’s fishing tackle, straightening It.
up for him to lie reudy for the spring •
campaign, when she cuinu across a.
corkscrew.
"Why, mamma," she exclaimed. 1 ,
“what Is tills for?"
“I'mI" sullied indmuia, "1 guess that'
Is a hook to catch bait with."—Detroit:
Free 1’ress.
Iluw Be (lav. Mini.,.if Hwmfi.
Mrs. tildboy — On account of tHo
house-cleaning Mrs. Ncwed learned
mirred to make you oluinge your mind?" j two things about her huhbiir.d-lliat he
"Well, John doesn't want to bo re-! cttmo |„ late, and that he Is a profane
leased, ami besides I have promised nm‘iirc.r.
Ktliel that she shall have the same pupa Mr „. Nabor-Why on account of the
until 181KI.”—Judge. houBO-oleaulng?
Mrs. oldboy—He took of? his shoes to
steal upNtuIrs and ran Into an ambus-
Tlieutrlcul Item.
Ftrst Woman—You ought to get your t ’ le 1 " 1 upeunrs anu ran into an
husband to take you to tho theater. 0,11 e neglected tncks.—I uck.
There Is un excellent play there,
Second Woman—Is It a four-net piny?
"No, only two,"
"Then he won’t go."—Texas Siftings.
Alilli'limtlon.
He will not itiurricil t>,.
The roe.on of 111. caura.f
lie*, ftlwttyn Icnl. you «ee.
A horror of divorce.
-.Judge
BKr.OyilKD IXNKW nEKK.
HERE AND THERE.
—I’lgs raised by a mother that has
fully attained her growth will have a
better start at weening time than
those from a half-grown sow.
—It Is safe to snr I at ninety-nine
farmers out of every hundred never
have unv fair appreciation of the poe-
elblliUes of intelligent dairying.
—Breeding from Immature stock lias
a tendency to degenerate the offspring
and gradually deteriorate their size,
vitality, growth and development
—A small, fut sheep will always
brings belter price than a large, poor
one: but If the largei sheep Is also
nude fut it will command a much bet
ter price.
—Whenever s check in growth oc
curs the animal must lie stunted In a
degree, and whenever there in a full
ing off In eoudltlon there must be a
check In growth.
—The advantage of alwaya keeping
plga thrifty and growing Is that they
are always ready for tlm knife, and a
better advantage can be taken of the
market
—Ax exchange lays that Military
confinement In a dark stable has a
tendency to make a horse vicious. It
affects the brain as it docs tbe brain of
n.hamau being. In such confinement
A l'ruitenf M.n.
Old Gentleman (to our driver)—My
friend, what do you do with your
wage* every week—put part of It In the
savings hunk?
Driver—No, sir. After payin' the
butcher un' grocer, an' rent, 1 pack
aivuy wlmt's left In barrels. I'm afraid
of them savin's banks.—Toxus Siftings.
Way I’p.
Fond Wife—1 want you to get Ethel'
and myself some of thosu twenty-four-,
button gloves.
Loving Husband—I cuuiiQt do It,,
dear. They are very expensive.
Fond Wife—I know It, darling. They
Come high, but wo must have them.—
N. Y. World.
A Careful Crltlsm. '
Cawker—Yon have scon Mra. John
Smith Shot ter play "Desdemons,"
haven't you?
C'umno—Yes.
Cawker—IVhat did you think of her
In the ileuth scene?
Cumso—She made the most life-like
i corpse 1 ever saw ou the sthge,— Judge,
Verified.
Be will be heard from lu this world,
The mother proudly skid,
He was. He mowed the Uwti .sch mora *
Ere folk, were out of bed. .
-,\y.n»hltutlos «u* '
tVheVe the 1'lu.rjtk Yjvy, t
Roundsman (reimrtliig at tho station
Visitor—How did you happen to lone j
four chickens, uncle?
Uncle ltiistus—Well, yo’ see, I lef do : nt II a. tn.)—I Just found Officer Murphy
loor of de coop open one night, an’ dey j drunk In O'Uurn'a saloon, sir.
tU went home.—Ht, IsmU Republic. 1 Hcrgcunl (ludlgnantlyi-Oo buck at
( once and arrest that villain O'Hara for
Thai Nllrrr Lining.
“Eb'ry cloud,” sahl Uncle Eben, “hah I
er stiver linin'. I hi trouble am dut cr
heap ob men uln't got energy 'uuff ter
hustle an' tu'hn de cloud wrong side
out.’’—Washington Star.
Itegular Courts.
Arriving Missionary — May I ask,
what course you Intend to take with i
me?
Savage King — The regular one. i
You'll follow the fish.—Life.
The Point of View.
To err I. human, tn forriro. divine—
Wr all admit ns '.nix. < f count-.
But If the *ls l •rrivi'C.' * it-liie.
Tvs n-itloed lb-l It hot ntiunu t! torce.
, -Oeniury
violating ilio excise law.—Puck.
Oitv or lh« Olhrr.
First Hoy—I've got two |nicks of fire-
eruekera left over from lust Fourth.
Second liny--Whet was ttie matter—-
rain or hospital?—Hood News.
A Yneuunt.
She—Van Poser is mi empty, don't yon
think?
tin—Hu seems very full of himself.
She—That’s tvhut I mean.—l’uck.
Ilud 111. Carriage.
llntler—I may lie poor, but there Wat
| • lime wlicii 1 rude In a carriage.
Poole-Yes. and your mother pushed
| t. _. XT V H*—