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ENGLISH IN CHICAGO.
DiMiuaaion on Grammar Between • 1 ewa
jMbpor Mid * CItIMMU
The Chicago Inter Ocean bee met
both sarcastic and incignant whei any
one questions the purity of its die ion.
So when a reader nam id Campbell ven
tured to criticise expressions used by its.
society editor the captious one found
that he had caught a Tartar. Thia is the
way The Inter Ocean puts it:
Inclosed with the following letter,
received a few days ago, were two clip
pings from the society columns of The
Inter Ocean:
Here are three barbarisms that caught my
eye in thia morning’s issue of your paper—
There is no aueh weed as “gowned"—it is
mearly a Cockney vulgarism that had ita
origin in London, England—“ Swellest" ia of
the same sort—and same origin—No American
having any regard for purity of language can
use such slang—As all these words appear in
ao called “society items" I take it your Society
editor is a male or female dude and needs a
lesson in language—The harm dona by the use
of such words in your paper is very great as
thousands of children read it and absorb its
words—Do stop this Cockney vulgarity—
J 4 MBS Campbell.
There is no doubt you mean well,
Jim, but a term in a night school would
be beneficial even to you before you be
gin to give lessons in English. To begin
with, you would be taught there that
our grandfather, Lindley Murray, al
ways told us to use periods. You ought
to have known Lindley, Jim. He war
a distinguished grammarian, you
know, or perhaps you don’t know.
And then, Jim, there was Tennyson.
He said of a heroine in one of his poems
that she was “gowned in pure white.”
So you see Lord Tennyson found the
word “gowned” to be useful long be
fore you learned towalk steady on your
hind feet or to eat with your front
hoofs. Webster says “gowned” means
“dressed in a gown; clad.”
Yeueay that these barbarians “caught
your-'dyb,*? and you fail to mention
, which eye they caught How is the
other eye?;
You are right when you say that our
society editor is either a male or a fe
male. Do you belong to one of these
sexes? We suspect not. When you writd
again, spell “merely” as it should be.
The way you spoiled it is like spelling
your name “camel” instead of “Camp
bell. ” See that hump?
We don’t like to offend your sensitive
ear, or the other one either, Jim. Buy
Webster’s Dictionary and a fourth read
er. Start right, and your sensitive ear
may outgrow its affliction.
SAVE THE DOGS’ EARS.
Cropping Them Prevent* the Animals
From Hearing Well.
Any one who has heard the mega
phone must have wondered at the ex
traordinary power of increasing sound
that ia produced by form, and I would
like to call attention to one point in
connection with cutting dogs’ ears that
I do not remember to have seen men
tioned anywhere that is, from an
acoustic standpoint:
I have lately purchased a small York
shire terrier, imported from England
only a few months ago. Its ears were
clipped in England after what the seller
of the dog declared to be “the very lat
est style.”
The ears were first clipped and then
stiffened up with three effects on the
dog:
First.—That the buzz of a bee or fly
causes him to retreat under cover of
safety.
Second.—That he ducks his head
when about to be patted, a sure sign of
the length of time the pain of the oper
ation must have lasted.
Third.—(An effect I had not expect
ed. ) That he has absolutely no idea of
the direction of sound.
In the ears of a mastiff dog any one
who observes the shell-like form of the
ear opening may easily imagine the im
mense power of such a trumpetlike in
strument to increase the volume of
sound. A change in the acoustical ar
rangement of the flap of the ear would
necessarily entirely puzzle and bewilder
the owner as to the direction of sound,
and this one point on ear cutting would
seem of itself to condemn the practice.
—Our Animal Friends.
A Natural Magnet.
Professor Smythe was once lecturing
in a provincial town on natural philos
ophy, and in the course of his experi
ments he introduced a most powerful
magnet, with which he attracted a
block of iron from a distance of two
feet.
“Can any of you conceive a greater
attractive* power?” demanded the lec
turer, with an air of triumph.
“I can,” answered a voice from the
audience.
“Not a natural terrestrial object?”
“Yes, indeed.”
The lecturer, somewhat puzzled,
challenged the man who had spoken to
name the article. Then up rose old
Johnny Sowerby. Said he:
“I will give you facts, professor, and
you can judge for yourself. When I wag
a young man, there was a little piece o’
natural magnet done up in a neat cot
ton dress as was called Betsy Maria.
She could draw me 14. miles on Sunday
over plowed land, no matter what the
wind or weather. There wasn’t no re
sistin her. That magnet o’ yourn is
pretty good, but it won’t draw so far as
Betsy Maria. ’ ’ —Strand Magazine.
His Connection.
Bannister, the comedian, was present
ed to a proud old Scotch dame. “Who
are the Bannisters?” she asked peevish
ly. “I do not recollect meeting with
them before.” ‘‘Madam,” replied the
actor gravely, “we are closely connect
ed with the Stairs.” “Ah, there is a
good and ancient family!” cried mad
am. “Mr. Bannister, I am delighted to
make your acquaintance.’’—Household
Words.
A Description.
“Oh, Maud?” said the other girt
‘ ‘Maud is the sort of girl that every fel
low who courts her has his arms full
and the man who marries her will have
his hands full.”—lndianapolis Journal.
| STORY OF A WAR SONG.
Tk. Mu Who Composed the Mosie tor
Are Coming, Father Abraham.**
The man who composed the music
for Whittier’s song, “We Are Coming,
: Father Abraham, Three Hundred Thou
sand Strong,” is an old and somewhat
- decrepit piuno tuner, who carries on his
business .near Windom, Minn. Hie
kame it A. B. Irving.
One day soon after Lincoln’s call for
<300,000 more men, Irving, then a young
man, was on his way to Defiance, 0.,
from Fort Wayne for the purpose of
, singing at a political and loyal meeting
He had considerable reputation as a
composer and singer and the Republic
ans had asked him to come and help
them. On the way he read the poem,
which had just been published. Irving
studied it, formulated a tune, hummed
it and got the rhythm, and that even
ing at the Defiance meeting he sang
the song for the first time. When he
had finished, and the last echoes had
died away, men mounted their chairs
with wild enthusiasm, swung their
hats and broke loose in cheers that rang
with feeling. He sang it again and
again, and they would scarcely let him
rest.
The next night he sang the song at
Foft Wayne, and again aroused the
same enthusiasm. He wrote out the
music and sent it to the publisher who
had handled what he had composed,
with instructions to publish it on his
usual terms of royalty. It was publish
ed, and inside of a month more than
40,000 copies had been sold. In a few
days the publisher failed and Irving
never received a dollar for the music.—
New York Sun.
CLOSED THE ROOM. .
Doe* the Ghost of Washington Still Stalk
Through the Old Mansion?
It was customary in the family of
George Washington to shut up unused
for two years a room in which death
had occurred, says an exchange. So,
after the death of the first president in
the stately chamber with the great four
poster bed which is still shown to visit
ors, Martha Washington, with her lone
ly heart, nightly climbed the attic stairs
to lie ; -i a low ceiled, sloping roofed
room with one window—a room intol
erably hot in summer, with little or no
means of securing a draft except by a
triangular opening where the lower cor
ner of the door had been cut off to make
room for the passage of the cat Martha
Washington died before the two year
period had ended.
If she had occupied the death cham
ber, would she have seen the ghost of
her dead husband? They say that the
stalwart stately figure of the brave
general stalks through the passage with
martial tread and clank of astral sword
in spectral scabbard.
Again and again it has happened (hat
people detained at Mount Vernon on the
business of the Mount Vernon associa
tion have declared, on “waking from a
sleepless night, ” that they had heard
the ghost’s sword and stride and seen
its tall, commanding figure, dressed in
the old uniform that in life it wore.
No lights are permitted in the old
house, for fear of fire, except during the
meeting of the regents, and then only
candles. Ghosts are said to love dark
or ill lighted houses.
Most Wonderful Cave In the World.
The most wonderful cave in the
world is in the island of Tonga, in the
south Pacific. Byron called it “ a chapel
of the seas ” It is formed in a rock that
is almost surrounded by the ocean. This
rock is about 60 feet high and broad
proportionately.
Many years ago a boy, the son of a
native chief, was chasing a huge turtle,
when his game seemed to sink into the
rock. The lad watched and waited until
the tide I’ell, disclosing a small opening
in the rock about six feet under low
water mark.
Diving boldly, the young hunter en
tered the aperture, and, to his surprise,
came to the surface inside the rock. The
rock was hollow, and its interior was
found afterward, when the natives ex
plored it with torches, to contain many
beautiful stalactites.
When attacked and followed by ene
mies, the natives, who know the secret,
leave their canoes, plunge into the water
and disappear. Their foes linger, aston
ished at their disappearance, for no per
son not acquainted with it would sus
pect that the rock was hollow.—London
Telegraph.
Costly Playinc Card*.
A pack of cards was recently sold at
a London stationer’s for S6OO. It was
one of the handsomest Italian copper
plate card games called “tarocchi di
Montegna,” made during the fifteenth
century. Another pack of cards recently
sold at Paris for almost S4OO. Each of
the cards in this pack is a master work
of the engraver’s art, and all the fig
ures in the game were historical por
traits. The queen of hearts, for instance,
represented Queen Anne of England,
the king of hearts being her husband,
Prince George of Denmark. The queen
of diamonds was Queen Anne Sophia of
Denmark, the queen of clubs the then
crown princess of Prussia, the wife of
Frederick William I, and the queen of
spades Princess Anna of Russia, later
on the czarina. The jacks in this deck
of cards represent the most prominent
diplomats of Europe at the same time.
—Philadelphia Record.
Meilhac’s Advice.
Somebody once wrote to the late
Henri Meilhac to ask his advice as to
how to become a dramatic author. “It
is a difficult career, and the trade is not
easy,” wrote back Meilhac. “Above
all, it needs success. Yes, success is
the thing if yon want to have talent. ”
It is claimed in behalf of the Bermu
das that the complexions of the natives
are the finest in the world. This seems
to be a clever advertisement" of the Ber
muda onion, of which 17,000,000
pounds are exported annually.
A. ' i ~.7 A& •
BETRAYED BY FLAPJACKS*
A Walter Who Can Tell a Maa's Ooete
P»tloa by tho Way H. Kate.
There is a waiter in a De irborn street
restaurant who has disco* wed the sci
ence of reading a man’s ociupation by
his manner of eating. He an look into
the calm eye of a customer engaged in
disarticulating a “ham and” and de
termine with wonderful accuracy
whether the man is a scissors grinder or
a State street merchant.
Os course one must be a close observer
to do all this, and it isn’t everybody
that is afforded a lunch counter for a
field of study. Yet if the student will
avail himself of opportunities while
seated at the mahogany board he will
find that when the business man is at
the table some habit acquired in the
daily pursuance of his profession will
be sure to show itself.
For an instance, the banker may come
in and order wheat cakes. If he does,
the waiter declares he will Invariably
dip his fingers in the water and run
over the cakes to sec if there is a mis
count.
The gambler will look around to see
if any one is watching and then palm a
slice of bread. If he orders flapjacks, be
is sure to slip them one by one from the
bottom as he eats them. The clothing
salesman will hold his flapjacks up to
the light and feel the texture, while the
keen observer will notice that the jew
eler, upon ordering pie, will hold it to
his ear, shake it and then listen, after
which he will lift off the top crust with
the point of his knife and examine the
insides.
During an interivew the other day
the waiter, stated that he called his new
science “eatistry,”
“I have not mastered my science
yet,” said he, “and seldom a day passes
but that I learn some new point. Oh,
it’s a great study, and I think in time
it will take its place along with palm
istry and phrenology and other kindred
sciences.”
“Have you ever made a mistake in
judging a man’s occupation?”
“Only once, and that could hardly be
called a paistake, for I made no decision
as to the man’s business. I confess I
was stumped. The fellow came in and
ordered his dinner. Os course I gave
him a glass of water. He looked at it
with some surprise and said, ‘I didn’t
order that. ’
“ ‘lt costs you nothing, ’ says I, ‘and
you don’t need to drink it unless you
want to. ’
“He thanked me, and what do you
think—he broke his bread into it and
then ate it with a spoon. I didn't know
what to make of it, and for the life of
me I couldn’t determine what his busi
ness was. When he was leaving, I tap
ped him on the shoulder and asked him
outright what he did for a living.
“ ‘Why,’ says he, ‘l’m a milkman.’ ”
—Chicago Inter-Ocean.
AN OLD GOVERNMENT DIE.
Coed by a Lawyer as * Paperweight Fear
Years.
In tho course of a lecture at the Ap
prentices’ library A. E. Outerbridge,
Jr., related an interesting incident that
serves to show how much more careful
Uncle Bam is in the destruction of old
dies for coins than he used to be. ‘ ‘ Soma
time ago,” said Mr. Outerbridge, “I
was visiting the office of a friend who is
a lawyer, when I noticed upon his desk
a little metal object, covered with three
or four coats of red paint, which was
apparently in use as a paperweight. It
was a government die for a silver dollar
of 1809, apd for my friend to have it in
his possession was a penal offense. He
did not know what it was until I told
him, and he informed me that it had
been around the office as a paperweight
as long as he could remember—4o years
at least. I gave him a silver weight in
its place and informed the authorities
at Washington of the circumstance, also
forwarding my friend’s affidavit as to
what he knew about it.
“At that time, though all dies were
supposed to be destroyed when discard
ed, the system was rather lax, and they
sometimes found their way into the pos
session of Junk dealers. I agreed to turn
over the die upon condition that it
should not be destroyed, but kept in the
numismatic collection at the Philadel
phia mint, and that I might borrow it
at -a fixture time to illustrate a lecture.
The conditions were agreed to, and I
have brought the die with me tonight
to show to you. I had to write a very
formal letter to get it, stating the pur
pose for which it was to be used, and it
must be returned tomorrow morning. ”
—Philadelphia Record.
Molting Metals.
A note concerning the peculiar phe
nomenon noticed in the melting of met
als when under extended pressure has
recently been published by H. Bischof
of Wiesbaden. When a metal is bedded
in a mortar of chemically pnre alumin
ium oxide, thoroughly dried and then
subjected to the necessary heat, a con
siderable retardation in melting is no
ticed. For instance, a rod of silver,
which should melt at 1,830 degrees F.,
when thus treated will not change its
form and melt together until 6,780 de
grees F. Palladium, which should melt
at 2,780 degrees F., shows no sign of
yielding at 2,900 degrees F. It would
seem that these rods of metal, unable to
expand while in the powerful grip of
the aluminium oxide, which contracts
on heating, simply cannot melt as they
would under normal conditions.
Boy Wanted.
Merchant (to applicant for position)
—Are you a good penman and a good
speller?
Applicant (who has recently graduat
ed from public schools with high hon
ors) —No, sir. I cannot spell well, nei
ther can I write legibly, but in physiol
ogy, astronomy, geology and zoology I
am an expert.
Merchant (testily to clerk in next
room) —John, send in some one with a
practical education.—Minneapolis Trib
une.
A DUEL IN THE SNOW.
The Incident Upon Whieh Was Fewaitsd
Oeremr's Boautlfnl Pietnro.
Every one has seen the engraving of
Gerome’s beautiful but sadly effective
picture, “A Duel In the Snow.”
Through the mist of early morning one
antagonist is lying on his back on the
sward, while bls adversary, leaning
cm a friend’s arm, is slowly walking
away from the scene of the encounter.
Both are wearing the masquerading cos
tume of a Pierrot. In a thicket a car
riage waits to drive off with the suc
cessful opponent.
There la every reason to believe, from
recently disclosed information by M.
Alfred Darimon, that in portraying on
canvas that impressive episode the
artist was not influenced by solely im
aginative caprice, but that he has repro
duced a scene in real life.
The faota are os follows: The duelists
were M. Jules Brame, a former minis
ter of public instruction under the sec
ond empire, and M. D. D., a well
known journalist on the staff of one of
the most influential newspapers in the
north of France. When the duel occur
red, both were studying for the bar.
One Shrove Tuesday they, in company
with friends, had repaired to a restau
rant on the Boulevard with a view of
enjoying a good dinner and afterward
at going to the masquerade ball at the
Opera. They all agreed to go as Pier
rots. As they all wore masks some one
suggested that they should adopt some
distinctive sign by which they could
recognize one another in the crowd. D.
D. suggested that they should pin a la
bel bearing a number to their backs.
The idea was unanimously adopted, and
D. D. prepared the labels accordingly.
While so doing a diabolical idea came
into his head. It was carnival time.
Why should he not have his little joke?
When it was Jules Brame’s turn to
have a ticket pinned to his back, his
friend D. D. had written in large letters
beneath the number, “I am Jules
Brame. ” One can easily imagine what
was the result. No sooner had Brame
set foot in the main passage to the pre
miere galerie than he was followed by a
lady wearing a mask, who, on his pre
paring to enter a private box, cried out,
“I wish you success, Jules Brame,”
Later on, on re-entering tho passage, he
was surrounded by a group of masquer
aders, who with one voice shouted out,
"Good day, my dear Brame.” That
proved to him that he was known to
every one, although be was puzzled to
understand how it could be.
Passing in front of a box opener, the
girl burst out laughing. He inquired
angrily what she was laughing at.
“Why,” she replied, “lam laughing
at the funny idea which led you to pin
a label on your back with your name
on it” And, suiting the action to the
word, she unpinned the label and band
ed it to him.
Jules Brame considered the joke not
only in bad taste, but insulting.-He
sought out his comrade, and, finding
him in the saloon, he reproaehed him
angrily in the hearing of the crowd, In
sisting that he should apologize openly
then and there. D. D., resenting his
friend’s attitude toward him, declined
to apologize. A duel therefore, in ac
cordance with French habits and cus
toms, was inevitable. Seconds were at
once chosen. Short swords were pro
cured, and in their Pierrot costumes the
antagonists started for the Bois de
Boulogne. Fortunately the duel did not
end fatally, as seems to be the case in
Gerome’s picture, for, although Brame
ran his sword right through D. D. ’s
body, no vital organ was touched. He
recovered very quickly, and the two an
tagonists became fast friends again.—
Westminster Gazette.
NECESSITIES COSTLY.
In Pari* Water II the Moat Preclons and
Kxcltuive Drink.
“Water is the most precious and ex
clusive drink you can order in Paris, ’ ’
writes Lilian Bell in a letter from the
French capital to The Ladies’ Home
Journal. “Imagine that, you who let
the water run to cool it 1 In Paris they
actually pay for water in their houses
by the quart. Artichokes and truffles
and mushrooms and silk stockings and
kid gloves are so cheap here that it
makes you blink your eyes, but eggs
and cream and milk are luxuries. Silks
and velvets are bewilderingly inexpen
sive, but cotton stuffs are from America
and are extravagances. They make them
up into ‘costumes’ and trim them with
velvet ribbon. Never by any chance
could you be supposed to send cotton
frocks to be washed every week. ' The
luxury of fresh, starched muslin dresses
and plenty of shirt waists is unknown.
“I never shall overcome the ecstasies
of laqghter which assail me when I see
varieties of coal exhibited in tiny shop
windows, set forth in high glass dishes,
as we exploit ohooolates at home. But
well they may reemot it, for it is really
very much freeze to death
than to buy coal in Paris. The reason
of all thia is the city tax on every chick
en, every oarrot, every egg brought into
Paris. Every mouthful of food is taxed.
This produces an enormous revenue, and
this is why the streets are so clean. It
is why the asphalt is as smooth as a
ballroom floor. It is why the whole of
Paris ia as beautiful as a dream. ’ ’
Too Much Like a Pan.
“No, sir,” said the Kansas editor,
“your services are no longer required-. ”
“May I venture to ask why I’m dis
charged?”
“You’re too blamed funny. That
style may do in the blase and heartless
east, but whan you refer to a death in a
owtaM M‘a terrible blow’ to the fam
ily you overdo it out here.’’—Detroit
News.
It is estimated that the United King
dom produces something like 1,500,000,-
000 gallons of milk every year over and
above what is used on the farms for
rearing calves, etc.
London has an army of 100,000 pick
pockets.
AN OPEN LETTER
To MOTHERS. «
WE ARE ASSERTING IN THE COURTS OUR RIGHT TO THE
* EXCLUSIVE USE OF THE WORD “CASTORIA,” AND
“PITCHER’S CASTORIA,’’ AS OUR TRADE MARK.
J, DR. SAMUEL PITCHER, 0/ Hyannis, Massachusetts,
was the originator of ** PITCHER’S CASTORIA,” the same
that has borne and does now //jr?, ,, — ' or * every
bear the facsimile signature of wrapper.
This is the original “ PITCHER’S CASTORIA,” which has been
used in the homes of the Mothers of America for over thirty
years. LOOK CAREFULLY at the wrapper and see that it is
the land youhave always.bought . on
and has the signature of wrap-
per. No one has authority from me to use my name ex
cept The Centaur Company of which Chas. H. Fletcher is
President. a
March 8.1897. Q#'—'' .
Do Not Be Deceived. .
Do not endanger the life of your child by accepting
a cheap substitute which some druggist may offer yo”
(because he makes a few more pennies ort it), the in
gredients of which even he does not know.
“The Kind You Have Always Bought”
- BEARS THE FAC-SIMILE SIGNATURE CF
The Kind That Never Failed You.
THE CENTAUR C Odd FAN V, IT MURRAY STREET, «!• TORX mITT,
—GET YOUR —
JOB PRINTING
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* ah '
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CENTRAL OF GEORGIA RAILWAY CO.
Schedule in Effect Jan. 9,1898 Z
"No. 4 N 0712 No? 8 T 1 FG? 1 *
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KUO am 810 pm 12 06 pm Ar Gordon.Lv IMpn TlVim 810 am
78 60 pm tIM pm ArMllledpevUleLv MSOam
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•Dally, texoept Sunday.
Train for Newnan and Carrollton leavesOriffln at 0«s am. and 1 jO p* dally except
Sunday. Beturn Ing, arrive* in GrUfin •80 p m ond 12 40 p m daily except Sunday. For
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*