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THE PROFESSOR’S BAEV.
Medical Sindeutw ~ro’ '“ * ’’ r
prl.luu Array of Present- »•
•‘When 1 w:.h n medical student in
the Uni versify of Pennsylvania, said
J e doe‘or “the boys celebrated an m
teresting event in the domestic life of
one of the professors in a unique way.
The news that the favorite professor
was a happy father reached the students
on Thursday morning, and that after
noon and evening there were consulta
tions held all over the university build
ings. and sundry dimes and quarters
were collected by two or three of the
students, who constituted a sort of
finance committee. Every Friday morn
ing the pressor gave a lecture to the
students in the amphitheater. The sub
ject for the lecture that week was ‘The
Relation of the Sympathetic Nervous
System to the Nerve Centers of the
Brain,' and half an hour before the
time set for the lecture every man in
the class, which numbered about 850,
was in his place waiting for the fun to
begin and glancing now and then to
ward the three long operating tables in
the center of the room.
“Promptly at 10 o'clock the door
opened and the favorite professor enter
ed the amphitheater. He carefully closed
the door behind him, then with a self
conscious clearing of his throat turned
toward the class. At the first glance his
jaw fell, while every one of the 850
fiends in the seats above began to yell
at the top of his lungs. Spread out upon
the three long operating tables were
about 150 baby’s toys and furnishings
of every kind and description. There
were rattlss by the dozen, Noah’s arks,
dolls of all sizes, a toy cooking stove,
a baby carriage, an embroidered flannel
petticoat, a nursing bottle lying in a
graduated glass, a pair of little blue kid
shoes and other things too numerous to
mention. After the first shock of sur
prise and embarrassment, the professor
was game. He thanked us, in a speech
peppered with five syllabled words, for
our thoughtfulness in thus providing
for the future needs of his offspring,
but he observed, after a careful exami
nation of the various instruments of in
fantile delight spread out before him,
that we had forgotten one thing, a bot
tle of paregoric. Then be yawned in a
way suggestive of midnight vigils and
turned his attention to ‘The Relation of
the Sympathetic Nervous System to the
Nerve Centers of the Brain.’
“But he was not allowed to proceed
beyond the first sentence or two. His
attention was drawn to the blackboard,
where some student of artistic tenden
cies had drawn an elaborately decorated
design in red, white and blue chalk,
‘ls Marriage a Failure?’ The poor pro
fessor, seeing that there was no possi
bility of a serious lecture that morning,
entertained us for about ten minutes on
the text posted on the blackboard; then,
after inviting us all to visit the new
comer in the immediate future, he
marched off to the music of 850 voices
singing, ‘Go to .Sleep, My Little Pick
aninny’ and ‘Daddy Wouldn’t Buy Me
a Bowwow.’ ’’ —New York Sun.
A SCENE OF BUTCHERY.
The Slaughter That Came With the
End of the Janizaries.
On the 15th day of June, 1826, the
whole corps of the janizaries in the
capital assembled, overturned their
camp kettles (the signal of revolt) and
advanced upon the seraglio. With his
own hand the sultan unfurled the
sacred “sanjak sherif” and called upon
the true believers to rally round their
dischah and caliph, and the zealous
Mussulman citizens rushed from all
quarters and rallied under the sacred
symbol. The ranks of the janizaries
were raked with grape and solid shot
by “Black Hell” (a nickname for Ibra
him, general of artillery) and his gun
ners as they pressed through the streets,
compelling them to fall back to the
Etmeidan, where they defended them
selves with extraordinary fierceness,
slaying great numbers of their assail
ants. The artillery, supported by the
marines and the bostangi, pressed for
ward and compelled them to retreat to
their barraeks, where they offered des
perate resistance to the assault.
From every street cannon thundered
on the walls without intermission, the
building was soon in flames, the walls
torn and battered down by grapeshot,
and the janizaries, overwhelmed by
ruins, shot and flames, perished in their
burning and blood stained barracks.
For two days the gates of the city re
mained closed, and with relentless vigor
every corner was searched for such
janizaries as had escaped the general
massacre, and when found they were
hastily executed. Nearly 20,000 jani
zaries were destroyed on this memora
ble day, and many thousands were aft
erward put to death in the various
cities of the empire, and thus not one
of the number under arms was left to
tell the tale. —Self Culture.
Accounted For the Fit.
Hon. George R. Peck so keenly ap
preciates a good joke that he tells the
following on himself:
“When, after a foreign trip, I was
being welcomed by some of my friends
in Topeka, I wore a suit of clothes
made by a London tailor that was un
comfortably tight in places. I expressed
my surprise that a loose fit in London
should prove a tight fit in Topeka,
Whereupon an Irishman of the party
exclaimed.
“ ‘Mr. Peck, don’t forget you’re a
bigger man in Topayka than you were
in London. ’ ” —Chicago Journal.
Untimely Nap.
“What time did the hotel catch fire?"
“Midnight. ”
“Everybody get out safely?”
“All except the night watchman. We
couldn’t wake him up in time.”—Bos
ton Traveler
The Danger of It.
n with too many irons in the
♦ to take one by the hot end.
'L. hows.
| HARTLEY’S GREAT NERVE.
A. Historical Incident of the Sieae of’
Gibraltar.
The most memorable siege of Gibraltar,
Indeed one of the most memorable of alb
sieges, was that which the fortress sus
tained from the combined sea forces of
France and Spain during the years 1779
to 1783. The great attack on the place
was made on the 13th of September, 1783,
and all the resources of power and science
were exhausted by the assailants in the
fruitless attempt.
It was on this day that a humble pri
vate performed an act which history has
handed down to us. The business of the
siege progressed. The rock by the batteries
sent forth its splinters to deal destruction
around at every impact of the Spanish
sliot, but the return lire was of the most
telling description and most steadily kept
up by tlie British.
But removed from tho smoke and din,
in the laboratory of the garrison, sur
rounded by the chemistry of war, sat ono
man, a humble private. His it was,
while his comrades worked the guns in
the suffocating casemates of the covered
batteries, to prepare tho shells for tho use
of tho mortars, a dangerous task—so
dangerous in fact that even tho examina
tion of the deadly missiles is considered
sufficiently perilous on board ship to war
rant a stage being slung over the side to
bowccupied by only ono or two men, tho
others being kept at a distance. But
familiarity with peril robs men of their
soar, and Hartley sat busily making ready
shell after shell, filling them with tho ex
plosive composition, and afterward fitting
in the fuses, driving them home and rang
ing tho prepared shells in cases till they
should be fetched to be sent in fiery arcs
to deal death and destruction among the
enemy.
Tho laboratory was at that time full of
explosive material, every grain of which
was of inestimable value to tho beleaguer
ed garrison, and it had been accordingly
placed in a position which rendered it im
possible for tho shot or shell of tho enemy
to reach it. But now the danger guarded
against from without threatened if pos
sible more terrible from within—threat
ened to destroy at ono blow the whole of
tho explosive compounds stored for de
fense, and this at a time when such a loss
would have been irreparable.
Shell after shell had been filled, the
grim black spheres, as they lay ready, giv
ing but small signs of their cloadly power
—the force that should rend them into in
numerable shreds of cast iron, each to
malm or slay.
Suddenly, while calmly proceeding with
his work and driving a fuse into a fresh
filled shell, tho fuse took fire, hissing
loudly as it discharged its rain of sparks
and burning rapidly away. There seem
ed hardly time for thought, much less for
action, and the first feelings of Hartley
were those of blank dismay.
He had seen the discharge and flight of
shells so often that he knew he could only
reckon upon its burning for a few sec
onds, and then would come a dire explo
sion that would act upon the part of the
fortress where he was like an earthquake,
the bursting of the shell being, as it were,
but the flash in the pan that would prelude
the blowing up of the laboratory. But
with the calmness of tho man whose trade
was one which brought him dally face to
face with death, Hartley seized the shell
in both hands, hurried out into tho open
air and then with a tremendous effort
hurled the deadly globe far into space,
where a couple of seconds after it harm
lessly burst. It was not until some time
after that the performer of this daring act
could thoroughly realize the great danger
that had threateneddiim with destruction,
and though tho peril was past it was
some time after, and then only with un
strung nerves, that he returned to his
perilous task.—London Chronicle.
The Lnmt of the Witchew.
Yeldhani, a highly civilized village in
the county of Essex, is now in a happy
and contented frame of mind. It has
buried the last of the witches—the end of
the long line of sibyls which commenced
at Endor. Why the poor old lady should
have been regarded as the possessor of an
“evil eye” is a mystery known only to her
superstitious follow villagers, except in
deed it was owing to the sorrows and mis
fortunes she suffered. Her daughter died
a few days ago, and her brother was accl J
dental!;.- killed some hours afterward.
These calamities, instead of arousing
sympathy, only led to a belief by the vil
lagers that she cast her evil eye on them
because, knowing her own departure was
at hand, she did not wish to leave them
behind. The poor old woman had a hard
life among the villagers, who boycotted
and insulted her on account of her alleged
supernatural gifts, and attributed every
petty accident that occurred in the locali
ty to her malign influence. Now she is aS
rest. —London Telegraph.
When William Was a Colonel.
In discussing the recent scandals as to
high play among officers at Potsdam the
Germania relates that when a similar rev
elation was made in the old emperor’s
time his majesty issued a very stringent
order against gambling in the army. This
provoked many private remonstrances on
the part of the young guardsmen and oth
ers, and the venerable kaiser was disposed
to relax the severity of his decree. He
found, however, a determined opponent
in his youthful grandson, Wilhelm, who
had recently been made a colonel of a
regiment. ,
“Sire,” cried the stern upholder of mo
rality, “am I still at the head of my regi
ment or not? If I am, I intend to be mas
ter; if not, I beg to be relieved of my com
mand.”
Grandpa had to give way, and ho signi
fied to the deputation that he would have
yielded a point, “but the colonel is as firm
as a rook. ” This at least is one of those
things that are all to “the colonel’s credit."
—London Chronicle.
A Kindergarten Conundrum.
In a Utica kindergarten school’’ a few
days ago the subject before the class was
the hen. Among other questions asked
by the teacher was ‘ 1 What does the hen
have that we have?” the teacher at the
same time placing both her hands on her
head to indicate the portion of the body
referred to. The teacher was much sur
prised as well as amused when a little
girl quickly answered, ‘‘A comb!” The
teacher had placed one hand on a comb in
her hair.—Utica Observer.
I p the Great St. Bernard.
Travelers are soon to be carried to the
top of the great St. Bernard by electrio
power. It has been estimated that 150,-
000 persons will travel from Aosta, in
Italy, to Marigny, in Switzerland, over
this route. When the road reaches the
high altitudes, sheds and protective walls
will lx; built to prevent landslides and
Other accidents. Power will be taken from
the mm crons mountain streams of the
great St. Bernard. Electrical World.
TENNYSON’S FAITH.
The Problem of the Future Life Hadi
the Dominant Interest.
A reader of the “Life of Tennyson,"
by his son, will be struck by the fact
that no subject interested him so deep
ly as the problem of the future life. He
will also observe that it was always a
problem to him, one that he was con
stantly raising, that would not stay set
tled. To be sure, he was a believer in
Immortality, but n-.t a restful Fulitve?.
Ho was all the time digging up the
roots of his faith to be sure they were
alive. The old question would not stay
unanswered. The Vender of his poetry
observes the same thing. Ho is always
on tho side of faith, but of a somewhat
disturbed faith. He belonged to that
“metaphysical society" which invited
into its membership believers of all
shades, with all shades of unbelievers,
whose object was. to raise and answer
doubts about God and the future life.
He was the spokesman of the scientific
doubt of the age, fluttering over the
dovecots of faith, but hardly settling
and resting and nesting therein.
One observes the contrast with this
fluttering faith who reads the poems of
Milton, with their abiding faith in the
future life. This is the spiritual con
trast between “In Memoriam" and
“Lycidas." In Milton’s requiem, even
under its paganized form, there is a ro
bust and jubilant faith in God and
eternal life. No question enters. The
mind and heart are satisfied. The dear
friend is beyond all doubt among the
saints and choirs above. Ono regrets
that Tennyson’s mental structure per
haps could find positiveness and rest on
questions of politics or poetry, but
must perennially dubitate—to be sure,
with the hopeful balance of probability
—over questions of faith. “I believe I
know," he once said, “the quantity of
every word in the English language
except scissors, ” but one seems to de
tect a tremulousness in his best expres
sion of faith, “I hope to meet my Pilot
face to face, when I have crossed tho
bar. ’ ’ —independent.
HARNESS REINS.
Made From the Stoutest of Leather.
A Word About llnud Holds.
The reins of a set of single harness
are each about 13 feet in length, those
of a double harness about 15 feet. For
business harness reins are made of
leather, tanned black; the reins of car
riage harness are made of russet colored
leather.
Reins require to be very stout, and
they are almost always made of steer
hide, the leather of which traces are
made, these, however, being of more
than one thickness. Occasionally lines
for light or for cheap harness are made
of cowhide, but not often. As a rule the
best of leather is used for the reins,
even in cheap harness. There can be ob
tained from the hides of leather suitable
for reins strips from seven to nine feet
in length, so that reins are always of
necessity made in two pieces.
Tbe loops, or hand holds, often seen
on the reins of track or road horses are
commonly made of lighter leather
stitched together and then sometimes
stitched to the reins, but more often se
cured to them in such a manner that
they can bo shifted on the reins to suit
the convenience of the driver. The
three loop hold, which is called the
Boston hand hold, is commonly used for
track driving. The single loop is the
one used by most drivers on the road.
There are patent hand holds made of
metal. The wooden buttons sometimes
seen on reins, used as hand holds, are
made in pairs, one button of each pair
having a stem, with a thread out on it,
which goes through the rein and is
screwed into the other button of the
pair on the opposite side.—New York
Sun.
Sowing Pansj- Seed.
During early October is a good time
for sowing pansy seed for next spring’s
supply of plants for bedding out. The
reason for fall sowing out of doors is
that the plants are not then subjected
to the hot, drying influences of the
house, which are so likely to bring on
red spider and other troubles.
Prepare a bed of very rich, porous
loam on a well drained location. Place
over it a frame to be filled with forest
leaves as a protection to the little plants
over winter. After sowing the seed in
the bed sift a very light covering of soil
over the seed, merely enough to hide
them. During the process of germina
tion never allow the bed to dry out, as
moisture is essential to perfect germina
tion of any seed.
As severe weather approaches cover
the bed with a few inches of litter of
some sort, forest leaves being preferable.
At the proper time in the spring the
seedlings may be pricked out of the soil
in the seedbed and transferred to the
bed in which they are to bloom.—Wom
an’s Home Companion.
One Day at a Time.
It is a blessed secret, says the British
Weekly, this of living by the day?
Any one can carry his burden, however
heavy, till nightfall. Any one can live
sweetly, patiently, lovingly, purely,
till the sun goes down. And this is all
that life ever really means to us—just
one little day. Do today’s duty. Fight
today’s temptations, and do not weaken
and distract yourself by looking for
ward to things you cannot see and could
not understand if you saw them. God
gives us nights to shut down the cur
tain of darkne-s on our little days. We
cannot see beyond. Short horizons
make life easier and give us one of
brave, true, holy living.
Worth IHn(*n»Nlnjc.
“Doctor, I don’t know what ■ the
matter with me. I can’t sleep nights
any more. ’ ’
“Um! Let’s see. What is your busi
ness?”
“I’m a night watchman.”
“Ah, your case is a remarkable one.
I must write it up f<r our Monthly
Medical Record.’’—Chicago News.
A CHINESE WEDDING.
i' Eve: y( hinn Connected Vi hthe Cere
nionle* Io Deckrd In lied.
| The Chinese place a significance upon
every color, and in connection with a
: wedding red obtains a deep rooted,
mysterious importance, tho next bridal
color in value being gold. At a be
trothal tho bridegroom elect sends his
sweetheart a pair of bracelets fastened
together with » piece of red ribbon or
cord. The brid and bridegroom drain
two wine cups at the wedding, which
are also connected by a red cord. In
northern Chi i tb■> attendants wear
tall felt hats, and each hat has a red
feather stuck upright in it. The attend
ants also carry the wedding presents.
A sedan chair bears tho bride herself.
In south China a se lan most wonder
fully’ gilded is used by the wealthy
classes, and it h dec rated with what
appears at first sight t > be brilliant in
laid stones, but which are in reality
the glossy feathers of tho kingfisher. A
handsome cloth of glowing red with
trimmed border is also thrown over the
chair.
In the case of the poorer classes red
is also the prevailing bridal color, and
a chair of ordinary carved wood, paint
ed a bright red, is used. Above tho door
of the chair a kind of charm is placard
ed or hung upon a red cloth. The chair
itself is sent by the bridegroom, accom
panied by what corresponds to cur best
man. This functionary brings with him
a letter written in yellow or gold upon
red paper, praying the lady to enter
and take her place.
Men dressed all in red and carrying
red parcels containing the presents fall
into the procession. Other bearers carry
boards and banners, inscribed in golden
letters upon a red ground. These ban
ners tell the pedigree of both parties.
Behind tho bearers come the other at
tendants, with long poles, on which are
hung very* handsome lanterns. The
bride’s veil is of bright crimson hue
and her dress regal gold and scarlet. —
Wide World.
JACK HORNER.
The Rich Plum That He Extracted
From That Chrlfftman Pie.
For the benefit of those who are not
quite little folks Agnes Carr Sage, in
Lippincott’s Magazine, tells the origin
and history of some famous nursery
stories and rhymes, among them “The
Pleasant History of Jack Horner,” con
taining “His Witty Tricks and Pleas
ant Pranks," for so it is set forth in a
very old chapbook, carefully preserved
in the Bodleian library.
It appears that this worthy’ was stew
ard to an abbot of Glastonbury. The
good abbot learned that his majesty
Henry VIII had seen fit to be indignant
because the monks had built a kitchen
which he could not burn down. Now, a
king's indignation was dangerous and
must be appeased. Therefore the abbot
sent his steward, Jack Horner, to pre
sent the soveieign with a suitable peace
offering. It took the form of a big and
tempting looking pie, beneath the crust
of which the transfer deeds of 12 man
ors were hidden.
But Master Jack had an eye for the
profit of No. 1, and on the road he
slyly lifted the crust and abstracted the
deeds of the Manor of Wells. On his
return, bringing the deeds, he plausibly
explained that they had been given to
him by tho king; hence the rhyme:
Little Jack Horner
Sat in a corner (of the wagon),
Ejing his Christmas pie;
Ho put in his thumb
And pulled out a plum (the title dead).
Haying, “What a brave boy am I!"
Town Name*.
The Cleveland Leader says that a man
registered in a local hotel the other day,
giving his place of residence as Sleepy
Eye, Minn. Half an hour later another
guest registered from Painted Post, la.
The clerk paid no especial attention
to this, but when the next man to regis
ter boldly wrote “White Pigeon,
Mich.,” after his name, both the clerk
and the bookkeeper began to get inter
ested.
While they were talking about the
queer names that had been given to
some of our western towns, a dignified
looking man stepped up to the office,
whirled the register around, and
scrawled “Horseheads, N. Y. ”
Superlative*.
Dr. Johnson says in his “Grammar
of the English Tongue:” “The com
parison of adjectives is very uncertain,
and, being much regulated by commo
diousness of utterance, is not easily re
duced to rules. ”
Then he quotes passages from “Para
dise Lost, ” in which these words are
found, “virtuousest, ” “powerfullest, ”
and a passage from “Samson Agonistes”
which contains the word “famousest.”
Surely Milton had an ear. —Notesand
Queries.
Mu ni cl ph I JepLonnicN.
New Yorker-—You ’fare a straugi r
here, 1 presume?
Chicago ManfhaughtHyl—l am from
the great city that New York is jealous
of.
New Yorker —Ah! ’And how are
things in dear old Lnnnonl —New York
New Way to Get icu-h.
An Arkansas contemporary r<
queer case of financial irregularity. It
appears that a young nihn down there
■wallowed a co] per c< rrtdiy mistake and
.
X— t She Bid.
.
“does your mother know you’re out?”
“Oh, yes, ” replied the fair one, “and
she gave me a penny to buy a monkey.
Are you for sale?”—Philatfi Iphia N
American.
Exrel« Tlint of n Woman.
Wife (reading the papcri—The gi
raffe has a tongue i s inebt s long
Hus! and—-Aren't y< a j ,d<,us?—New
York World.
■ Arßv rWRR*' Irlt
<®Jk Jff 1 Ks. W
/bM rWJ i ■ FAi
'i'li, Kind Yi.it Have Always Bought, and which has been
in t:so for ov r 30 yearn, has borne the signature of
* and has been mode under his per-
z J , sonal supervision since its infancy.
AIIOW no Oll< , to<lece|ve you ln
All Counterfeits, Imitations and Substitutes arc but Ex
periments that trifle with and endanger the health of
Infants ami Children—Experience against Experiment.
What is CASTORIA
Csistoria is a substitute for Castor Oil, Paregoric, Drops
ami Soothing Syrups, it is Harmless and Pleasant. It
contains neither Opium, Morphine nor other Narcotic
substance. Its age is its guarantee. It destroys Worms
and allays Feverishness. It cures Diarrhoea and Wind
Colic. It relieves Teething Troubles, cures Constipation
and Flatulency. It assimilates the Food, regulates the
Stomach and Bowels, giving healthy and natural sleep.
The Children’s Panacea—The Mother’s Friend.
GENUINE CASTORIA ALWAYS
Bears the Signature of
The Kind You Have Always Bought
In Use For Over 30 Year?.
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