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4A ®jje Heraltr Tuesday, July 13,2021
Opinions
Chicago is like the OK Corral every day
It may surprise some
of you to know that I read
with interest the daily
e-mail feed from the New
York Times. The Times
leans far left but it is
one of the few publica
tions left where grammar
and punctuation remain
relevant. The stories
are beautifully written.
You can tell the writers
were forced to diagram
sentences as was I.
Their stories are also
accompanied by top
notch photography.
I do get exasperated
with the paper’s so-called
‘explainers’ in which the
effete liberals on staff,
who consider Central
Park rural, get to lecture
us on issues we heathens
out in the country could
have no concept of like
climate change, forestry
management on public
lands, the godliness of
Anthony Fauci, the glam
our of Dr. Jill and how
some new COVID variant
will kill us all if we don’t
wear at least two masks.
Last week, these folks
‘explained’ that Chicago
is well placed as a big
city refuge from the
threat of global warming.
They wrote, “Chicago
is far away from rising
oceans and melting gla
ciers. It does not sit in
the path of hurricanes,
nor is it vulnerable to the
rising number of forest
fires in the American
west.”
Long ago, I went to
Chicago on business. It
was January. It didn’t
seem much like a refuge
to me. I was worried
about freezing to death.
I never got
warm on the
entire trip even
in my hotel
room where I
could control
the tempera
ture. I would
have paid good
money for
some global
warming.
Never have
I been so glad
to leave a place
than I was
when my plane
left O’Hare
headed back to Atlanta.
I would have to have a
really good reason or be
very well compensated
to return to Chicago even
in the summer. Chicago
is, and long has been, a
hotbed of crime. A1 Ca
pone and his Outfit were
the Pope and his
Council of Cardi
nals compared
to the thugs who
are remorse
lessly shooting
up the city now
without fear of
apprehension or
prosecution.
Over the
recent Inde
pendence Day
weekend, over
100 people were
shot and 19 of
them killed.
The victims
included a police officer,
two federal agents, a
one-month old girl, two
girls ages five and six, an
11-year-old boy and the
list just keeps going and
going. When the weekend
had ended, Chicago had
recorded 2,000 shootings
for 2021.
In that Chicago has
some of the strictest
gun control laws in the
nation, I am awaiting the
Times’ ‘explainer’ on this
but I’m not holding my
breath. I will just have
to read about the his
tory and legacy of the
Westminster Dog Show
instead.
Were climate change
to chase me to the Windy
City, I would prefer to
wear body armor and
take a strike team along.
I would ask Gen. James
‘Mad Dog’ Mattis to lead
it. Mattis is famous for
his fondness for gunplay.
“Be polite, be profes
sional but have a plan to
kill everyone you meet,”
Mattis once said. My
all-star self defense team
would also include Clint
Eastwood, Chuck Norris,
Doc Holliday, the Earp
Brothers and Baby Face
Nelson, his penchant for
the Thompson subma
chine gun could perhaps
even the odds. After all,
Chicago is like the OK
Corral every day.
Yes, I realize most of
these folks are dead and
those who are not are
past their prime (no of
fense Chuck).
Yes, this is fantasy.
But it is not so far
fetched as pitching
Chicago as a place to
take refuge from climate
change or anything else
for that matter.
Walter Geiger is editor and publisher
of The Herald-Gazette and Pike
County Journal Reporter.
GEIGER’S
COUNTER
Walter Geiger
Editor & Publisher
Commercial silliness
annoys the customers
KAY S. PEDR0TTI
kayspedrotti@gmail.com
Who has not been
disappointed by apparel
stores, restaurants,
grocers, auto dealers or
sundry other commer
cial ven
tures that
some
times
come
very
close to
“bait and
switch”
or just
plain
dumb
sales decisions?
Case in point: when
dining recently at an
eatery selling some of
the area’s best smoked
sausage, my husband
asked for “smoked
sausage on a bun,” or a
“smoked sausage sand
wich,” if that’s what
they called it. The coun
ter person summoned
another employee from
the kitchen, who said,
“We sell our sausage by
the plate, or one pound,
or three pounds.”
Okay - so since their
sausage is sliced in
lengthwise half-pieces
about three to four inch
es long, what was the
big deal about putting
a couple of them, after
frying, onto a sandwich
bun? The “plate” turned
out to have about five
of those pieces, nicely
done, with two side
items. There was a
piece of “Texas toast”
also. So why not charge
extra for another
piece of toast to make
a sandwich, or just
establish a decent price
for a smoked sausage
sandwich? Seems to me
that no losses would be
involved, since the res
taurant can charge (usu
ally) what the traffic will
bear. Busy folks on the
job haven’t time or in
clination to sit down to
sausage and two sides,
but most likely would
happily pay for some of
that good sausage on a
hand-held bun!
In too many eating
places, one must accept
an objectionable por
tion of something just
to get something really
desired. Whatever hap
pened to “the customer
is always right,” or
“have it your way”? Just
thinking ...
Also, the “time is
running out” ploy is so
universal now that no
one thinks twice about
running out to buy a
duplicate of something
that’s already in the
house - only because
the coupon time is
expiring. That’s how I
once wound up with a
half-dozen large bottles
of my favorite shampoo
all at once. Took me
more than two years to
use it all up, and I’m not
at all sure it didn’t lose
some of its best quali
ties in that time.
Many eons ago, “Rob
erts Store” in Fitzgerald
was the supplier of all
the goodies for which
my cousins and I could
wheedle money from
our parents, aunts,
uncles or grandparents.
Best of all the goodies
were the 6-inch-diam-
eter “Johnny cakes,” a
cross between a sugar
cookie and what is now
called a Snickerdoodle.
The price was five
cents - but one day it
went up to 10 cents. Not
only the heartbroken
children, but also their
elders, protested until
Roberts restored the
nickle price and peace
reigned. Of course,
some other items were
marked up - but at least
the kids were learn
ing that the customer
is, was and always has
been - right.
Kay S. Pedrotti has spent some
50 years writing for newspapers.
She is active in the Lamar County
community and currently serves as
the president of Lamar Arts. She
lives in Milner with her husband Bob
Pedrotti.
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zette welcomes
letters to the edi
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tual name, address and
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letters that are
racially divisive.
Send letters to
RO. Box 220, Barnesville,
30204, email it to news@
barnesville.com or drop
it by 509 Greenwood
Street, Barnesville.
Kudzu & Clay: Pitter patter
I am very connected
to the sounds of my
house. I would say I
am in tune with most
sounds, except for when
people are talking. My
wife tells me all the time
that I am going deaf.
Sometimes I can’t hear
her. Always, I can hear
my house. All it takes is
for someone to take one
step and I know who
they are and where they
are. Our house is older.
Each room has a differ
ent squeak. Each stair
has its own little song.
Each human has their
own cadence when they
walk. I can even tell if
I screwed something
up and my wife is mad
at me depending on
how she walks around.
My favorite sound in
the house is made by
the way my son runs
around, that pitter-
patter the elderly fella
in front of the nursing
home reminisces about.
Recently we did
some necessary renova
tions to our house and
had hardwood floors
installed over some
ancient and very worn
carpet. Hardwood floors
in a house are like
having leather in a car,
there is just something
about it. Carpet, on the
other hand, carpet is
carpet. Sure there are
varying levels of quality,
but does it really mat
ter? Nobody’s going to
ask if they can pull their
socks off and run their
toes through it.
I am quite happy
with the floors, but for
a while there I felt like I
was losing my mind. All
of the sounds changed.
I was no longer
able to use
my superpow
ers to sneak
around unde
tected or know
who was going
where. It took
me about a
month to fully
adjust to the
new sounds.
Another thing
changed:the
pitter-patter
isn’t the same. It’s not
the soft muffled sound
that it used to be. It’s
deep and bassy and
echoes throughout.
There is nothing left to
muffle it. If I’m in my
basement it’s so loud
that I fear the floor is
going to collapse right
down on me, but I know
it won’t, at least not
until I pay it off.
The kid always wakes
up before everyone in
the house. Like a little
bird on a spring morn
ing. Every morning.
He wakes up and then
wakes us up. My wife
is usually kind enough
to let me sleep a while
longer. Except now, I
can’t do that. The early
morning pitter-patter
resonates through
every wall in the house,
every floor, every filling
in my teeth. There are
mornings where my
son puts in more steps
around our house than
a marathon runner does
in a year.
There are mornings
when I find this quite
frustrating. Then I get
frustrated for getting
frustrated at a kid for
being a kid. My wife has
made me hyper-aware
of the passing
of time and
the aging of
my son. Every
birthday she
tears up be
cause it is the
last birthday
for that year.
Every Christ
mas the same.
I tend not to be
the most senti
mental person
in the world, but
I am grateful that she
does this because time
passes faster and faster
every day. This chap
ter of my life, the one
where I am raising a kid,
is certainly one of the
most interesting, but it
also seems to be going
by the fastest for sure.
Now when I lie in
bed trying to not get
frustrated at getting
frustrated at a kid being
a kid, I have started to
notice that the pitter-
patter isn’t as rapid as
it once was. He isn’t
running laps as much
as he used to. His legs
are longer, his stride
has lengthened, and the
pitters are more spaced
out. He is heavier than
he was, the patters are
louder and deeper. And
one day I’ll be that old
fella in the rocking chair
reminiscing about the
pitter-patter, but until
then I am seriously con
sidering moving back to
carpet.
Chris Walter is a writer, artist,
and Barnesville native. He has just
published his first book, “Southern
Glitter”. You can find more informa
tion about his art and writings at
kudzuandclay.com.
KUDZU &
CLAY
Chris Walter
FLASHBACK
In honor of
Elizabeth Sellers
July 11-17
10 years ago
Funding for the base
ball, softball and T-Ball
programs at the recre
ation department were
cut from the 2012 county
budget. Player fees were
expected to double
and recreation director
Buddy Lanier was hope
ful volunteers would step
up and get involved.
25 years ago
Judge Hal Craig reject
ed a motion to suppress
evidence in the case of
Damon Brantley, a body
guard for pop super-
star Whitney Houston.
Brantley was stopped
on 1-75 by Trooper
Wynn Gregory. In the
car, Gregory located 33
grams of cocaine. Brant
ley was charged with
trafficking in a controlled
substance.
50 years ago
Chief Tubby Usery
reported a string of
burglaries had plagued
the city over a two-week
period. The juke box at
city pool was robbed of
$21 while Spick and Span
grocery lost $15 to a bur
glar who entered through
a rear window. A home
on Redbud Drive was hit
and a .22 pistol, 16 gauge
shotgun and $15 in coins
were stolen.
100 years ago
Dr. E. T. Holmes re
cently spent a week as
the guest of Senator J. W.
Callahan of Bainbridge
on his yacht on a fishing
trip. They fished from
Bainbridge to the Gulf
and had a great time of it,
catching an abundance
of fish and enjoying the
outing to the fullest ex
tent. Senator Callahan is
a prominent and wealthy
citizen of Bainbridge and
his section of Georgia.
barnesville.com
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P.0. Box 220
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