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THE
Volume 8.
E Cl TIZEN.
Waynesboro, Georgia, Saturday, July 13th, 1889.
Number 11
L. C. Hay.vf., J.T. Newbery,
-President. Cashier.
Planters Loan § pavings Bank,
821 Broad St., AUGUSTA, GA,
Capital—All Paid in Cash, $100,000.
With Stockholders liability which guaran
tees absolute safety to all depositors.
This is the oldest Savings Bank in this city
with an unbroken record of nearly 20 years.
It transacts a general Banking business in
all of its branches, and is authorized to re
ceive and disburse money, securities or prop
erty in trust, and to act as financial ageutfor
any person lirin or corporation.
Interest allowed on deposits in the
Savings Department. apr3U,’89-by
The- Earl of Zetland, who is j
the Viceroy of Ireland, manages to j
keen body and soul together on a i
salary of $375,000.
a diamond was recently
found at Cape Colony, It is now on
exhibition at the Paris exhibition,
and is valued at $3,000,000.
££T Sain Jones says that when
the Lord made him he lost the pat
tern. If this saying had not pro
ceeded from the mouth of such a
«rood man, the congregation would
have thought him very “cheeky.”
Col. Jones’ parents caught
old father time by the forelock
when they named their son Primus.
There is something in a name, else
Col. Jones would never have been
able to get in the first bale every
season for several years ahead of
the competition ot the cotton world.
Either Proctor Knott Is a
very game horse, or his owner car
ries about with him a good deal of
Sam Jones’ backbone. He was
twice beaten by Spokane, but re
cently at the Chicago races, he ran
three lengths ahead of his great
rival, and the whole state of Ken-1
tucky is again happy.
£S" Numerous fissures have sud- j
<ienlv appeared in the earth near :
Matanzas. on the island of Cuba.!
Some of these fissures are six hun- j
dred feet long, twenty-four feet;
wide, and two hundred feet deep. |
The inhabitants are alarmel, and |
not being able to account for these I
freaks of nature, are apprehensive ;
that trouble is ahead.
The Central railroad seems |
to favor Sunday travelling, to such j
an extent that it gives a bounty to
any one who will “excurt” on this
day. In its excursion rates to Ty-
hee, it allows a reduction ot fifty j
cents on every ticket sold, provided j
the party using it travelled either \
way on Sunday. On all of its ex-!
cursion rates the Sunday ticket is j
made cheaper by titty cents.
Bill Arp’s article in a recent i
issue of the Sunday Constitution, j
says, that “the farmers sweat and j
toil tor the support of the country;
and get no thanks for it. They are
fleeced by the merchants, robbed by
the protective tariff, bled by the
lawyers and doctors, impoverished j
by the sugar and the jute trust,!
and the corners in wheat and corn j
and bacon. They have to work on
the roads and serve on the juries, 1
and live hard and die poor, and j
have no comforts except rest on j
Sunday and a cheap religion.”
—
gjS~ Primus Jones’ first bale of;
■cotton had a demoralizing tendency
on the New York cotton gamblers,
and the market in consequence be
came shaky. Speculators are gener
ally very timid, and in watching
the signs of the times, a very little
thing causes these .big giants to!
quake in their boots. This hale of
cotton got here a few days ahead of j
their*calculation, and hence, as they I
were not prepared to give a satis
factory reason for its early coming,
they were troubled. The world is
always wishing for a big crop, but
the hare idea that a big crop is be
ing made, frightens the dealers in
fleecy staple and their cry of dis
tress wails out over the country.
They scent danger from the far otf
distance, and every straw is care
fully watched to help on their con
clusions as to where the winds will
blow.
The Brady bill which was
killed in the senate in the last legis
lature, may pass muster this time.
The popular sentiment against the
the use of guano is gaining ground.
The larger proportion of guano is
bought on a credit, and as the
Brady bill would kill out most ef
fectually nil time sales, the pas
sage of this bill would have a ten
dency to keep time with the popu
lar sentiment. If it passes, there
will be a reaction in a few years
coming from the same people who
now favor its passage. There is no
doubt hut that guano increases the
yield of cotton. Wilt the farmers
who havn’t the cash to pay be will
ing for those who have money, to
to enjoy the benefit of increasing
their crops? Men who make large
crops can afford small prices better
than they wlio are forced to work
poor land. Sometimes a rebound
ing ball hits a heavy lick.
GUARD AGAINST THE STRIKE,
And always have a bottle of Acker’s
English Remedy in the house. You
cannot tell how soon Croup may
strike your little one, or a cold or
•cough may fasten itself upon you.
One dose is a preventive and a few
doses a positive cure. All throat
and lung troubles yield to its treat
ment. A sample bottle is given you
tree and remedy guaranteed by
Whitehead & Co., Waynesboro and
E. A. Harris & Co., Midville.
—Subscriptions are always cash.
Ei/.- The True Citizen.
FAREWELL TO JUTE.
Farewell, Jute, farewell; it is painful to my
heart,
To think after years of friendship we must
part; v
Together we have sailed o’er the dark blue
sea,
As a friend, not a doubt, have I ever had of
thee.
You are sielt, you must die, let me tell you
so—
Still you are spurred on by Jones, Gratz &
Co.,
Once agp'n would I press yon to my heart,
but ’tis too late.
For I’m in Georgia and she is a Southern
state.
On my bosom you might find a resting place
still.
Dr. Trust will have a chance to try his medi
cal skill—
Now on tliy deathbed so kind and tender,
A dear, old friend I can’t help but remember.
May holy angels guard thee on the river of
death,
This monster trust will desert thee while you
gasp for breath.
In infancy and old age, you have been my
protection and shield,
I now get a covering from my lieecy staple
In the field.
Farewell Jute, in tears, good-bye—but the
bagging ring—
Backed up by Uncle Sam and the rest of
monied kings.
They have drank wine and pocketed a mint
of gold,
The Bible tells us what became of Belshazzar
of old.
Denounced as murderers throughout our
Southern clime,
They await the Judgment of God’s appointed
time,
The Lord have mercy upon tl eir wicked,
thievish souls,
I hope they will repent before Gabriel blows.
Cotton.
Union Alliance, Girth, Ga., July 1st, 1889,
TIIK AUGUSTA AMI WEST FLORIDA RAILWAY.
A 11111 Introduced In the Legislature for a Charter.
Augusta Chronicle, 7th inst.
The Chronicle is pleased to give
its readers information of a most
important railroad enterprise,which
if carried to a successful issue, will
he of vast benefit to Augusta. A
number of the best business men in
the state are interested in the pro
jected road, and it is sate to say
that, if they use as good judgment
in managing its affairs as has been
shown by most of them in manag
ing their own, the road will be built.
The charter is now in the hands of
Mr. J. It. Lamar, who will see to its
passage by the legislature. The
road is to he called the Augusta
and West Florida railway, and, as
soon as the charter is granted, an
organization will be effected and
immediate steps taken to get every
thing in business shape.
The hoard of corporators is a very
strong one, both as to financial abil
ity and business character. The
Augusta members are Jesse Thomp
son, owner of one of the largest
door, sash and blind manufactories
in the South; W. N. Mereier, one of
our leading cotton factors, and J. P.
Verdery, president of the Enter
prise Cotton mills. The other cor
porators are T. C. Hogue, president
of the Washington Exchange hank,
Washington; T. R. Green, a large
merchant and real estate owner,
Washington; C. E. Smith, of Wash
ington,who organized the company;
T. J. Dempsey, of Jackson, Ga., an
experienced and successful railroad
contractor and merchant; A. T.
MacIntyre, Jr., S. G. McLendon and
A. P. Wright, all amongst the lead
ing men of Thomasville.
The projected route of this road is
through all or a portion of the coun
ties of Richmond, Burke, Jefferson,
Emanuel, Johnson, Montgomery,
Laurens, Dodge, Irwin, Wilcox,
Berrien,Worth, Colquitt and Thom
as, to the Florida line, and thence
through Tallahassee to the Gulf
coast. The taxable value of prop
erty in tiie counties named amounts
to more than thirty-five millions of
dollars, of which more than nine
teen millions of dollars is in real
estate. From the city of Augusta
to Midvilie, on the Geoigia Central
railroad, is one of the best farming
sections in the state, the crops con
sisting of corn, cotton, wheat, oats,
melons, etc. The distance from
Augusta to Midville is fifty miles.
From Midville to Thomasville,
about 170 miles, is the heart of the
famous Georgia yellow pine region,
where the. farms are generally
small, and the quantity of choice
pine almost incalculable.
The demand for this choice lum
ber for building purposes, for interi
or finishing, and for export for ship
building, can scarcely be supplied.
Twenty years ago the now-famous
long-leaf pine lands of Georgia
could he bougfit for from twenty to
fifty cents per acre, and the same
lands are now held firmly at from
three to five dollars per acre tor the
timber alone, wherever they are
convenient to railroad or w’ater
transportation. Every acre of pine
land in Georgia is becoming more
valuable each year for lumber and
turpentine, and the area where this
land can be bought Is rapidly les
sening.
The counties through which the
road will pass have a total area of
more than four millions of acres, of
which probably one-third or more
is in timber. The soil is adapted to
the growth of all the cereals, cotton,
melons, fruits, early vegetables, and
the famous Le Conte pear, of which
I many thousand acres are already
! planted and hearing lruit. This
] choice pear hears transportation
j well, and thousands of bushels will
! be shipped to Northern markets
j during the present summer. It is
confidently predicted that the pear
groves of South Georgia will soon
equal in value the orange groves of
Florida, and the Augusta and West
Florida will penetrate the country
where they grow to perfection.
The freights to be expected would
be the agricultural products of the
country, such as cotton, melons,
fruits, early vegetables, lumber and
turpentine. An average acre of
pine land will yield one carload of
lumber, and estimating the number
of acres of timber land along the
proposed line at the very low figure
of one million, which is far below
the truth, the road would have, in
the course of time, one million car
loads of freight in lumber alone.
In addition to this would be an im
mense quantity of turpentine, rosin,
<.fce. The melon business of South
Georgia is rapidly developing into
a great industry, and the different
railroads which penetrate that sec
tion will transport to Northern
markets more than two thousand
carloads during the present season.
The A. & W. F. could furnish a
shorter route to the Northern cities
than any other line; and time is
everything in the transportation of
perishable freights.
The saving in distance to passen
gers coining to Augusta and going
fo Thomasville and Middle or West
Florida would be more than seven
ty-five miles over any other route,
and the building of this road would
at once establish a great through
passenger line to Thomasville, Tal
lahassee and the Gulf coast.
No winter resort in the South is
growing in favor so rapidly as
Thomasville. Many thousand of
Northern visitors enjoyed its balmy
climate during the past winter, and
the number that visit ileacii season
is limited only by the capacity of
its hotels and boarding houses.—
Large numbers of Northern men
have built beautiful winter homes,
and many others are investing in
vineyards, fruit and vegetable
farms.
Nearly all new railroads have to
meet the competition of parallel
lines already in operation, and with
the advantages all in favor of the
old roads, the new lines frequently
“go to the wall,” In this particular
the Augusta and West Florida oc
cupies a peculiarly favored position,
because it will have exclusive con
trol of the business of its territory.
On the West, the Georgia Central
is the nearest parallel line, and the
average distance between the two
would be more than forty miles.
On the East, the Savannah, Florida
and Western is the nearest parallel
road, running at an average dis
tance of about fifty miles. This po
sition of competing roads will give
the new line as much territory as
any railroad can occupy to advan
tage.
The Midville and Swainsboro
railroad, eighteen miles in length,
gives a fine illustration of the
freight business to he expected from
railroads penetrating the yellow
pine belt of Georgia. This little
road has been in operation for sev
eral years, and is making for Its
owner a net profit above all expen
ses of more than 7 per cent, on an
investment of $250,000.
Another illustration is seen in
the wonderful business now being
done by the Georgia and Florida,
running from Macon to Valdosta,
through a yellow pine country for a
distance of 150 miles. The stock of
the construction company which is
building this road has steadily
climbed from its par value of 100
until it Is now worth more than 200.
The freight business of these two
roads is mainly in lumber.
The road would penetrate a sec
tion which, even with its present
very poor railroad facilities, ships
about one hundred thousand bales
of cotton, and this would be largely
and rapidly increased as soon as
the timber can he marketed. As at
present situated, land owners can
not afford to cut down and waste
their valuable pine forests for pur
poses of cultivation, hut with rail
road transportation convenient, the
lumber would be marketed at once
and the land devoted to cultivation.
This would cause a iarge and im
mediate increase in arable land,
and it is not extravagant to say that
production would be doubled.
Subscribers to the stock will not
be asked to take any risk and sub
scriptions will be received either in
land or money. All subscriptions
will be payable in each county as
soon as the road is completed to
that county, and Augusta subscrip
tions will be due when the whole
line is completed to Thomasville.—
On this plan, no subscriber risks the
loss of a dollar and pays only for a
finished road.
The Chronicle wishes the Augus
ta and West Florida abundant and
speedy success.
Surere Cases ol Blood Poison.
Thousands suffer from blood poison, who
would be cured if they gave BI? B, (Botan
ic Blood Balm) a trial, Send to the Blood
Balm Co, Atlanta, Ga, for book of wonderful
cures, that convince the most skeptical, It
is sent free.
J O Gibson, Meridian, Miss, writes: “For
a number of years I suffered untold agonies
from blood poison. Several prominent phy
sicians did me little if any good, I began
to use B B B with very little faith, but, to
my utter surprise it has made me a well and
hearty person.”
V. T Hallerton, Macon, Ga, writes: “I con
tracted hlood poison, I first tried physi
cians, and then went to Hot. Springs, I re
turned home a ruined man physically,
Nothing seemed to do me any good. My
mother persuaded me to try B B B, To my
utter astonishment every ulcer quickly
healed.”
Benj Morris, Atlanta, Ga, writes: “I suf
fered years from syphilitic hlood poison
which refused to be cured by all treatment,
physicians pronounced it a hopeless case,
1 had no appetite, I had pains in hips and
joints and my kidneys were diseased. My
throat was ulcerated and my breast a
mass of running sores. In this condition I
commenced a use of B B B, It healed every
ulcer and sore and cured me completely
within two months.”
Worshipping a Lunatic.
Savannah News, 7th inst.
The Ohio crank who claims to be
Christ is more worshipped than
ever by his negro followers in Lib
erty county since his trial for luna
cy a week ago. Although he was
adjudged a lunatic, he has not been
arrested, and the negroes are more
than ever convinced that he is the
real Christ. They believe that the
jail will not hold him and they fall
down on their hands and knees be
fore him wherever he goes. Ilis
followers are increasing every day
and are praying and preparing for
the march to the land of Canaan,
where the man they believe to he
Christ is to lead them next month.
He has told them that he has sent
for a “kyar load” of angels’ wings
for his 300 chosen followers, and he
is looking for them to arrive every
day. The superstitious negroes are
flocking to the false leader from all
directions, leaving their homes,
crops, and all their possessions to
follow him into the promised land.
Farmers are unable to get help, and
in some instances turpentine oper
ators have been compelled to shut
down their stills because their
hands would not work. The luna
tic has told them that there is no
need for them to work, hut to fol
low him, and he will lead them to
Canaan.
Bell, who is causing all the trouble
is the same man who attempted to
preach in the streets of Savannah
over a year ago, and who announced
that he would lecture in Turner
hall, but failed to put in an appear
ance. He was arrested here, but
was turned loose and sent out of the
city. Since then he has been in
Liberty county.
HAPPINESS AND CONTENTMENT
Cannot go hand if we look on the
dark side of every little obstacle.
Nothing will so darken life and
and make it a burden as dyspepsia.
Acker’s Dyspepsia Tablets will cure
the worst form of dyspepsia, consti
pation and indigestion, and make
life a happiness and pleasure. Sold
at 25 and 50 cents by Whitehead &
Co., Waynesboro and E. A. Harris
& Co., Midville.
Pardoned to Go to ilia Dying Mother’s Bedside.
Atlanta, Ga., July 9.—J. A. But
ler, of Wilkinson county, was sen
tenced to the chain gang on two in
dictments for 13 years. He served
about 12 years of the sentence.—
Sometime ago Gov. Gordon learned
that the convict’s mother was at the
point of death, and having received
an application for his pardon he
concluded to grant it. Last Satur
day the governor ordered Butler’s
release by telegraph. He was too
late, however; the poor woman was
dead and buried a few hours before
her son arrived.
The Great Dismal Swamp.
of Virginia, is one enormous quag
mire of decayed vegetation, a re
gion of gloom and desolation; but
not more so than the human system
when blocked up by decayed ani
mal matter, which poisons the blood
and brings gloom to an otherwise
happy household. Dr. Pierce’s Pleas
ant Purgative Pellets remove all
waste matter, and give nature a
chance to build up.
Wyoming's Election.
Cheyenne, Wyo., July 9.—The
election of delegates to the constitu
tional convention held yesterday
resulted in the choice of thirty-six
Republicans, sixteen Democrats
and three Independents. The con
vention will meet September 2d.
The desire for a state government
is general.
A DUTY TO YOURSELF.
It is surprising that people will
use a common ordinary pill when
they can secure a valuable English
one for the same money. Dr. Ack
er’s English Pills are a positive
cure for sickheadache and all liver
troubles. They are small, sweet,
easily taken and are for sale by
Whitehead & Co., Waynesboro and
F. A. Harris & Co., Midville.
ANOTHER MAMMOTH CAVE.
An OtaioPaTern That Klrals That or Kentucky in
Size anil Wonderful Feature*.
A rival to the great Mammoth
cave has at last been discovered.
Henry Griendle, living on the lime
stone ridge, over the line in Wyan
dot county, was plowing, when one
of his horses broke through the
earth into a deep hole. It was res
cued from its position with great
difficulty. Upon examining the
spot, Griendle found a large hole,
leading perpendicularly down into
the earth. He dropped in a stone
and heard it rumble and rattle in its
downward course till the sound
died away in the distance.
Sensational reports of this discov
ery reached the city of Findlay, O.,
an exploring party was made up
and drove over to the ridge to as
certain what was the bottom of the
story and the hole. The party con
sisted of half a dozen well-known
gentlemen, who were provided
with ropes, lights, fireworks, etc., to
make a thorough exploration. Hav
ing fixed everything in readiness for
the descent, the question arose as
to who should first go down. The
men looked into the dark mysteri
ous hole, mentally made a calcula
tion as to the probability of finding
a nest of rattlesnakes at the bottom
and eacli one was perfectly satisfied
to let several others go down first.
Finally one of the party sum
moned up sufficient courage and
volunteered to make the descent
alone. As he was lowered down,
down, down, the light of uis lantern
could be seen growing lainter and
smaller unj.il a tiny speck was visi
ble. After letting out the rope
about 100 feet, a faint, muffled whis
per announced that he had found
solid bottom. The reporter went
down next, and finally the whole
party found itself at the bottom of
the shaft.
The hole descends through lime
stone rock all the way down, and
varies in diameter from 3 to 30 feet.
The bottom is dry rock, and the
place proved to be a capacious cav
ern. The place where the landing
was made was estimated to be 00
feet in width, and while the ceiling
at that point was low, it gradually
rose like a dome to the height of
fully 50 feet. The floor was very
uneven. The party had not gone a
quarter of a mile when they were
suddenly confronted by a yawning
chasm, 10 feet in width and an un
known depth. Beyond this impas
sable cleft they could see the roof
glittering in the light of their lan-
ters.
Several roman candles were fired
into the space, but the side walls
could not be seen, so there is no
telling how far the cave extends in
that direction. The fireworks re
vealed numerous stalactites and
stalagmites of beautiful formation,
whose marble-like whiteness glis
tened and shone resplendent in
vari-colored lights. The roof spark
led with a frost-like incrustation
which reflected the light from a
myriad of shining points as though
the whole dome were set in dia
monds.
Retracing their steps for some
distance, the party found to the
right a small opening at the top of
the steep ascent, and entering it,
were obliged to crawl on their hands
and knees for a distance of perhaps
ten yards. Then the cavern sud
denly opened in another mammoth
chamber, apparently much larger
than the first one, and possessing
more stalactite formations. At a
great distance froq^ the entrance
they came upon a lake of pure, cold
water, as clear as crystal and of un
fathomable depth. Holding a light
to the water, a shining penny was
dropped in and its gradual descent
watched until it had fallen appa
rently fifty feet, when all trace ot
it was lost.
The water of the lake was perfect
ly still and dead, there being no
current, and no signs of fish or ani
mal life were visible. A few shells
were picked up on the shore of the
lake, and, being again shut off - from
further advance, the party retraced
their steps. Openings were seen in
other directions, as if the cavern
extended its wings still farther, but
fear of losing their way and of the
oil in the lanterns giving out pre
vented further explorations at pres
ent. It is proposed at some time in
the near future to make further ex
amination, going provided with
boats, ladders, planks, etc., that the
lakes and chasms mav not stop the
way.
WE CAN AND DO
Guarantee Acker’s Blood Elixir for
it has been fully demonstrated to
the people ot the country that it is
superior to all other preparations
for blood diseases. It is a positive
cure for syphilitic poisoning, ulcers,
eruptions and pimples. It purifies
the whole system and thoroughly
builds up the constitution. White-
head & Co., Waynesboro and E. A.
Harris & Co., Midville.
A COMPANION STORY TO THE CALAMUS FARM.
A Hum in Cucumber.
Griffin News.
It is well-known that when cu
cumbers are first cut from the vine
there is a piece which exudes or
bleeds from the stem. One of our
prominent Northern truck growers,
Jared Bensom, cut his hand a year
or two ago, and this juice got into
the cut, and his hand commenced
to inflame, and an eruption similar
to erysipelas made its appearance
on his hand and extended up his
arm, and finally spread over his
whole body. Strange to say, there
was no pain attending these erup
tions of erysipelas, and he contin
ued to gather and pack his cucum
bers and prepare them for shipment
To the great surprise of everybody
these little erysipelas pimples as
sumed the appearance and form of
small cucumbers, and continued to
grow. Although Bensom kept well
and hearty, he was compelled to
strip himself and take to his bed.
Of course the news of this strange
phenomenon spread far and wide,
and the doctors and scientific men
visited him from various sections of
the country. One prescribed one
thing and one another. One wish
ed to bleed him; one wished to cut
the cucumber off; another said not
let him have any water and they
would dry up; another said stick a
hole in each cucumber and they
would die and a new skin form; an
other wished to wrap him up in a
mammoth poultice of barnyard ma
nure and draw them all to one
head; another said they ought to be
scattered. Each had a different
remedy, hut all disagreed. So there
was some hope that the patient
would get well. But the small cu
cumbers grew into big ones, and his
whole body was completely covered
with them from head to foot, and
they commenced to ripen and turn
yellow and hang down, and the
man assumed the appearance of a
huge bunch of bananas. When
they got ripe they began to shrivel
and dry up, and so did the man.—
His sap was all gone and he died.
The doctors procured the consent
of the family to permit an autopsy
to be made, for the benefit of
science, and they cut into him with
their knives, and to their amaze
ment found no flesh, no blood, no
bones, no muscles, no sinews, no
veins, no arteries; hut found only
one solid mass of cucumber seed.
It was so remarkable that it would
he useless to have the remains in
terred and foolish to have them
cremated, and the widow conclud
ed that she would keep them in the
house. She had ttie corpse hungup
by the hair in the barn. The next
spring some ot the children picked
up some ot the seed which had
dropped on the floor and planted
them. They grew rapidly and ma
tured, and instead of being like the
parent stock of cucumbers, they
were pure pickles, and needed no
vinegar, no nepper, no salt, nothing
but simply packing into barrels and
shipping to market and selling. Of
course, news of the discovery spread
rapidly, and multitudes of applica
tions for seed flowed in like the in
coming tide, and thus enabled the
disconsolate widow and children to
turn the cause ot their bereavement
into a means of maintenance and
support. The wind of affliction was
thus tempered to these shorn lambs.
They sold small packets of seeds
for big prices, and could not supply
the demand. The vine grown from
the new seed is a perennial ever
green, and can be propagated from
cuttings, blooms in the spring, and
bears in the summer a bountiful
crop ot perfect pickles. The widow
sells the seed at $1 a paper.
•'Death Has so Many Doors to LetOnt Lite.”
sang an old-time poet. In those
days they had not discovered reme
dies that shut these doors. How
different is Dr. Pierce’s Golden Med
ical Discovery, from the old-time
doses. Consumption or lung-scrofu
la, is one wide door that it shuts, if
taken in time. Don’t waste a mo
ment then, lest life slip through
that open door. It is guaranteed to
cure in all cases of diseases for
which it is recommended, or money
paid for it will be refunded.
Kniflug White Capa.
Appleton, Wis., July 9.—August
Belz was called to his door by a
dozen White Caps Sunday night.
They attempted to flog him for al
leged wife-beating. Belz drew a
bowie knife and slashed right and
left, cutting a number of his assail
ants, giving one probably a fatal
wound in the stomach. The vVhite
Caps escaped with their wounded,
and Belz got safely back into his
house.
A CHILD KILLED.
Another child killed by the use of
opiates given in the form of sooth
ing syrup. Why mothers give their
children such deadly poison is sur
prising when they can relieve the
child of its peculiar troubles by us
ing Acker’s Baby Soother. It con
tains no opium or morphine. Sold
by Whitehead & Co., Waynesboro,
and E. A. Harris & Co., Midville.
A woodlark—A picnic in a grove.
Cool proceeding—An ice trust.
In the soup—Well, that’s the cook’s
secret.
It must be very exciting for the
insect world to see an antelope.
The motto of the socialist—One
country, one flag, one pocketbook.
Ships are very polite. They al
ways meet the ocean’s wave with a
bow.
If there is one thing more than
another that “goes against the
grain,” it is a reaper.
With the camel, as with the diner,
the desert is frequently the last
course.
We believe that an Italian who
should start out with a noiseless
hand organ would make money.
A lisping young miss said she
hoped to be married before she was
as “old ath Mith Thuthelah
The woodman’s axe is an incon
sistent weapon. First it cuts a tree
down and then cuts it up.
Did you ever observe that while
you can see through a glass window
you can’t see through a glass eye?
It is hard, of course, to be disap
pointed in love, but it is a good deal
harder to be disappointed in mar
riage.
Never give to a young man on a
small salary a present of a higti
silk hat. He can’t afford to dress
up to it.
A man last week came very near
getting his wife arrested by leaving
$5 in counterfeit change in his vest
pocket over night.
Littleend—“My wife never gives
me any rest so long as she’s awake.”
Henpect—“Pshaw! my wife even
talks in her sleep.”
A wind-engine company has been
chartered in Pennsylvania. It
should go to Chicago and begin
work on the Cronin case.
Cadillac—“Don’t you think a full
beard would become me, Miss Bes
sie?” Miss Bessie—“Indeed I do,
Mr. Cadillac; it would hide your
face.”
Jinks—“Do you suppose a man
with a family can live on a dollar a
day and be a Christian?” Jinks—
“Of course. He can’t afford to bo
anything else.”
“Ah, Malinda, you are indeed one
of a hundred, and—” “Thank you,
Mr. Montague, I prefer to be con
sidered as one of eighteen, as I am.
One of a hundred!”
Tell a woman that she looks fresh
and she will smile all over. Tell a
man the same thing, and if he does
not kick you it is either because he
has corns or he daresn’t.
Guide (to American tourist in
Venice)—“You’ll want to see the
Lion of St. Mark, of course, sir?”
Tourist—“Yes, I s’pose so. About
what time do they feed him?”
Effie—Mamma, why does the
boat make that dreadful noise?
Mamma—That is because she is
just going to start. Effie—If I was
as sorry as that I wouldn’t go.
Mrs. Lumking—Job was a very
patient man, wasn’t he? Mr. Lum-
kins—YeS7~hut he never tried to
keep an infernal English sparrow
from building in the rain spout!
Her intended—Well, I have com
menced to save up for our little
home, darling. I quit smoking to
day. His intended—And—and—I
haven’t chewed any gum in a week.
“If a naughty girl would hurt you,
you would forgive her, like a good
girl, wouldn’t you?” asked a teach-
of a little girl. “Yes, ma’am,” re
plied the child, “if I couldn’t catch
her.”
Old Cashbox (to applicant for
clerkship)—“Have you any bad hab
its, young man ?” Applicant (with
humility)—“I sometimes think I
drink too much cold water with my
meals.”
“Hast thou ever yet loved, Henri
etta ?” I sighed “I should rather
imagine I had,” she replied. “Oh,
did not my glances my feelings be
tray, when you helped me the third
time to pudding to-day?”
Trumble (on Lubor day)—Are the
men who march at the head of
each company the walking dele
gates? Laborer—No; thim gin til- '
men what rides in the kerridges are
the walking delegates, sur.
Mrs. Younghusband—This girl is
too young for a nurse. She is hard
ly taller than the baby itself. Mad
ame O’Rourke (of the Continental
Employment Agency)—And sure
then, madame, if she drops the
baby it won’t have so far to fall.
Foul poisous that accumulate in the blood
and rot the machinery of the system, are
eradicated and expelled by using Prickly
Ash Bitters, a medicine that will not irritate
the stomach or bowels, It acts in a gentle
manner on these delicate organs, and re
stores health in every case,