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ANECDOTE Os MR. JUSTICE ALLEN PA**.
The irritable disposition of Mr. Justice Paik
is often exhibited under very lud.crous circum
stances. Some years ago. while a A orkshire
butcher was undergoing examination as a wit.
ness in a case in the Court ot Common Pleas,
an undefinablc sound was heai m t.e imine
dkue vicinity of the witness. “ Silence m thc
Court, there,” cried Mr. Justice Park, in his
usual sharp and irritable manner.
“ Just repeat that answer to my question,
said he, addressing himself to the witness.—
“ The noise which that person made prevented
my hearing it distinctly. w
“ I said, mv 'ord, I was not
Here the same undefinablc sound was again
heard. .. T
“Ifthat person again interrupts the court, 1
will order him to be taken into custody at once.
Tiie court must be respected ; there must be
no more of these unmannerly noises. Officer,
preserve, at your i»eril, order in the couk.
“ Yes, mv lord.” said the officer, bustling
forward and looking eagerly about him, as if
determined to detect the party the next time
the noise was repeated.
A dead silence prevailed for some seconds
after thc sharp rebuke was administered to the
d.sorderlv party.
“ Toe last question I put to you, witness,
was, whether vou say the dciCiidant thc night
before the transaction was said to bave taken
place.” .
“ I am not able, my lord, to say positively.
Here the witness was again interrupted bv
a loud growl from a large inastill bc.onging to
himself, which flashed conviction on the minds
of all present that the author of the two former
outrages on the dignity of the court belonged
to the canine, not to the human spec es.
“Whose dog is that?” said Mr. Justice
Park, his eyes flashing indignation as he spoke.
“He is mine, my lord,” answered the wit
ness.
“ Then, sir, you ought to have more respect
for the court than to bring him here with you.”
“ He followed me against my will, my lord.”
“ Tien you must either put him out, or see
that he be quiet.”
“ I’ll take care, my lord, that lie makes no
more noise.”
“ 'lVer,” continued the witness, addressing
the dog, “ Tiger, you be quiet, sir—you lie
down, sir.”
The examination was resumed. When Mr.
Justice Park came to the sixth or seventh ques
tion, Tiger set up another tremendous under
growl, which threw the whole court into con
vulsions of laughter, and which worked up the
irritable faculties of his lordship to the highest
possible pitch.
Here it may be proper to observe, that the
cause of the different growls which Tiger emit
ted was a small terrier belonging to someone
in the court, with which Tigcr seemed, for some
reason or other best known to himself, to be
on very bad terms.
“Officer,” vociferated Mr. Justice Park,
« officer, do your duty, and take that dog out
of court.”
Wiiether it was that the officer mistook the
four-footed author of the disturbance, or that
the surly aspect of Tiger frightened him from
touching him, 1 cannot say ; hut thc fact was,
he was proceeding to take ou* the little harm
less terrier out of court, and had no intention
of disturbing T ger, when Mr. Justice Park
observed, •* Not that dog, officer, but the oth
e•. That dog has behaved himself very prop
erly indeed ; nothing could be more gentle
manly than his conduct. Leave him alone.’
A “ damper” for the humane.
Poor Cork indale ? why it was in this very
spot tnat lie plunged into the river l.ke a New
foundland dog, and saved tne life of an unfor
tunate female: —Tne Humane Society sent
him a silver medal; and from that hour the
desire of saving increased upon him as it does
upon a miser. lie neglected his business to
take long daily rambles by the Serpentine, or
wherever else there seemed a chance of grati
fying iiis propensity—and above all, he haun
ted the scene of his former exploit, under the
very common expectation that what had oc
curred once would happen again in the same
locality. And, curiously enough, t'.ie calcula
tion was partly to be realized. At the same
hour, on the same day of the month, as before,
I was walking with him on our road to the
Wells, when lo and be sold ! at the identical
spot we perceived a bov in the last stage of
distress, wringing his hands, weeping aloud,
and gazing intently for something which seem
ed to nave disappeared in the river. We of
course inquired what was the matter ; but the
poor fellow was too overcome to speak intelli
gibly ; though lie was able to intimate by signs
tiie cause of his agony was in the water ; in
such cases every moment is precious ; and
merely throwing off his new hat, Corkindale
was instantly diving in the stream, where he
kept under, indeed, so long, that I really began
to tear that he had been grappled by some
perishing wretch at the bottom. At last, how
ever, he emerged ; but it was only to ask ea
gerly for a more explicit direction. By this
time the poor boy was more composed, so as
to be able to direct the search rather more to
the left—which was with the current. Ac
cordingly, down went Corkindale, a second
time, in the direction pointed out, but with no
better success ; and when he came up again,
between.agitation and exertion, he was almost
exhausted. At last lie was just able to articu
late, “ Gracious heaven ! Nothing—not a
Shred !” The anxiety of the poor bov, in the
meantime, seemed extreme. “ Law bless you
sir, for ever and ever,” said lie, “ for going in,
sir —but do but just try again—pray, pray do,
sir!” Corkindale did not require urging.—
“ Quick ! quick !” says he, making himself up
for another attempt, “ tell me, man or wo
man ?” “Oh ! how good on you, sir,” cries
tne poor fellow, quite delighted at the fresh
hope — ‘ Oh! how very, very good on you,
sir. But it's nobody, sir, but a hook /—a hook
forfishing / And oh dear!—‘if you don’t find
it! —for I’ve got never a fardin to buy anoth
er !”
For the Southern Poet.
LIYES TO AMELIA.
Amelia ! of the beauteous train,
With looks so lively and so gay,
Say, wilt thou never kindly deign
To think of me when far away ?
Your angel smile and form so light,
I cannot always hope to sec;
Yet when soft silence reigns at night,
Amelia, fair, remember me.
When dancing nt the assembly ball,
Amid the cheerful and the gay ;
And thou the handsomest of all,
Say, wilt thou cast one thought on me ?
And when the youthful crowd is gone,
And hushed the sounds of senseless glee,
Wilt thou, before dull sleep comes on,
Oh, look to Heaven and think of me ?
When o’er your wearied form doth creep,
The silent rest to all is given,
Oh ! may you sweetly dream and sleep,
And your rewards be that of Heaven !
When you arise at sunshine hour,
May lovely birds sing on your tree ;
Then wreathe for me hopes loveliest flower,
And kindly, friendly, think of me.
Remember me when spring comes on,
When woods are covered o’er with flowers;
When birds are flitting o’er the lawn—
Oh, think of me in all those hours !
When sultry summer burns the plain,
And scorching plants die on the lea;
When storms are howling o’er the main,
Amelia 1 oh, remember me.
When autumn comes and leaves lie dead,
And meadows all are brown and sear ;
When singing birds away are fled,
And nothing’s left that’s lovely here :
When winter comes with chilling blast,
And not a leaf left on the tree ;
Wilt thou as long as life doth last,
Kindly, oh, kindly think of me ?
Oh, think cf me when all is still,
When nature’s layed her charge asleep;
When on each grove and purling rill,
Soft silence reigns profound and deep.
And Amelia, should you meet
Some faithful friend of me and thee—
Softly my name to him repeat,
And then, oh, then remember me.
MUZA.
SCRAPS FROM THE GERMAN OF JEAN rAITL.
Good and ill Fortune. —l le is the true poet,
who remains faithful to his muse, not in adver
sity, but in prosperity. The voice of genius
should be, not like the wind, which is not heard
till a storm is rising, but like music, that rises
on a quiet and serene atmosphere.
Poetry. —Poetry is not trifling, though it
produce no tangible, material results. Heat,
light and attraction, are all imperceptible to
our senses, we know that they pervade and
animate all nature, and that matter, without
them, were an unformed clod.
Mixture of good and bad. —Many men are
good at one moment, bad at another ; and their
moral qualities are like a bundle of horse-hairs,
some of which may be used lor strangling,
others to produce exquisite melody.
General Humanity. —Life, in every shape,
should be precious to us, for the same reason
that thc Turks carefully collect every scrap of
paper that comes in their way—because the
name of God may be written upon it.
Insensibility. —There are some men who
live in an atmosphere of talent, without being
improved by it; like fish that live in salt wa
ter, yet have a flat taste themselves, and are
detestable without condiments.
Secret Envy. —The best of men murmur
less at thc good fortune of others, even if un
merited, than they do at hearing them praised
undeservedly.
Beauty and Goodness. —The union of beau
ty and goodness, reminds us of that lustre and
healing virtue in the diamond.
The Present. —The Present is a narrow
tongue of land, between the vest oceans of the
Past and the Future.
Wits. —Coldness of heart is favorable to
brilliant wit, as the aurora coruscates most vi
vidly in icy regions.
Time. —Time is the mask of eternity.
New-York Mirror.
Simp/icity of Dress —l like, l confess, to see
a young wife neatly dressed. There is a
neatness which is perfectly compatible with
plainness ; and a dress may be graceful, with
out being ridiculous. 1 like a neat simplicity,
because, some how or other, there appears to
be a frequent connection between the outside
and the inside. The exterior is, to some ex
tent, a key to the interior. If I see a person
dressed like a thorough-going fop, I cannot,
if l would, respect the mind of the person. —
Even were a future close acquaintance dis
l closes to me my error, it is hard to overcome
first impressions.
A NEWSPAPER.
“ With baked, and broiled, and stewed, and toasted,
And fried, and boiled, and smoked, and roasted,
We treat the town.”
A public newspaper, which is conducted with
a design to afford entertainment to readers of
a great variety of tastes, is a complete salmr.
gundi. It contains a mass of inconsistent, in
coherent, heterogenous, although useful and
agreeable matter. The curious, and in some
cases, ludicrous advertisements, the contradic
tory substance of foreign and domestic para
graphs, thc opposite opinions and observations
of contending correspondents, the great varie
ty of editorial essays and paragraphs, some
serious, some comic, some descriptive, some ;
scientific, and some political, the variety ol j
ship-news, deaths, marriages, markets, stocks, ■
&c., &c., form a fund of entertainment for a
world, of which it is in itself no bad epitome.
In a newspaper, the general tenor and ar
rangement of the various articles of domestic
news is not a little curious. Paragraphs are
thrown together, without any regard to the
subjects ot which they treat —and it is often
the case that paragraphs of a character entire
ly dissimilar are placed in juxta-position. It
is not unfrequcntly that we find immediately
after an article of a grave and moral tenor, a
bon mot of a tendency somewhat equivocal—
a tale of murder is followed by a witty epigram
—an account of a public dinner is followed by
an obituary of an alderman, or some dignitary,
w ho died of appoplexy —after a long army of
toasts, comes a pathetic illustration of thc evils
of intemperance —a homily in favor of strong
moral principles, is followed by a string of pa
ragraphs detailing various cases of theft, fraud,
and swindling—-an essay, showing the value
of the Union, is succeeded by an article, which
smacks strongly of nullification —and a neat
compliment to the virtue, intelligence, and good
order of our citizens, is followed by an ac
count of a horrid duel, or of disgraceful ex
cesses committed by a lawless mob—thus the
paragraphs in a newspaper will often follow
each other in the same natural order as in real
life.
It is also curious to observe tlie different ef
fects which the various articles of intelligence
have on different persons. Thus, one person
will turn up his nose at an article on banks,
and look for paragraphs on more frivolous sub
jects ; one delights in a tale of slander; anoth
er in an essay replete with pious instruction ;
one is in ccstases at meeting with a violent po
litical article; another eschews politics, and
looks for romantic incidents or stories; one
searches for scientific information, another
snaps at a humorous anecdote or conundrum ;
one is in raptures w ith a piece of poetry, anoth
er reads eagerly thc account of the money
market; one values a newsp iptr fir its numer-
ous list of deaths, another for its long array of
marriages.
And thus a newspaper is happily calculated
to hit the ordinary and unbounded prejudices
of society ; to excite and put in motion all the
feelings of the human mind. It is a magazine,
a’toy shop, where every one may find his hobby
horse ; and where all capacities and descrip
tions may be regularly, at stated times, furnish
ed with instruction, amusement, and informa
tion. It s a well arranged table (V hotel, where
are found all the luxuries, as well as thc neces-
saries of life. The currency of the country
is now the roast turkey of the times, and a
dish equally sumptuous to the high-toned ark .
tocrat, as to the loafing loco-foco ; while the
latest news from Washington may be regarded
as plumb-pudding, and is greedily swallowed
by all; other subjects act as vegetables ; and
our packets from Europe bring us condiments
in abundance.
Such is a newspaper of the present day ;
and the family which does not take one, at least,
is to be pitied. It deprives itself of an impor
tant source of information and happiness.
Boston Journal.
THE WORLD WE LIVE IN.
The Irish blunderer is sui generis; and it
is not only of a class by itself, but it is of the
best class. It always puzzles, which mere
clownishness does not; but it always amuses
by its odity, its novelty, and its humor. Os
this order was the exclamation of the Irish gen
tleman who, on getting a ten pound prize in
the lottery, and finding that the prize was less
than the money which he had paid for it, cried
out, “ What luck it was that I did not get the
£20,000 : I must have been entirely ruined !”
An orator in the Irish House of Commons
was describing the inordinate love of praise
which characterised an opponent. “ The hon
orable member,” said lie, “ is so fond of be
ing praised, that I really believe he would be
content to give up the ghost, if it were but to
look up and read the stone-cutter’s pufF on his
grave.”
“ Contempt of money,” was the expression
of another. “ The honorable member profes
ses to play the philosopher. I can assure you,
Mr. .Speaker, that if there is any one office
that glitters in the eyes of the honorable mem
ber, it is that of purse-bearer ; a pension to
him is a compendium of allthe cardinal virtues.
All his statesmanship is comprehended in the
art of taxing ; and for good, better, and liest,
in the scale of human nature, he invariably
reads pence, shillings, and pounds. I verily
believe.” exclaimed the orator, rising to the
height of his conception, “ that if the honora
ble gentleman were an undertaker, it would be
the delight of his heart to see all mankind sei
zed with a common mortality, that he might
I have the benefit of the general burial, end pro-
• vide scarves aud hat-bands for tlie survivors.
The answer of one of the officers of the
British brigade to the French King after an ac
tion, was longasourceof amusement in France
and is still on record as an histance of the preg
nant brusqueric of the sons of St. Patrick. —
Tlie King, in proportioning out his royal praise,
observed that one of the regiments had behaved
with great gallantry, “as was evident from
the number of its wounded.” “Acs, your
Majesty,” said thc impatient and gallant Ma
jor, jealous for the honor of his own battalion,
“ they behaved well ; but 1 may take leave to
say, we behaved better ; they might have had
many wounded, and no blame to them, but
we were all killed .”
This talent goes through all ranks. We re
member to have 1 end a woman, w ho was scold
ing her brats for some pranks, exclaim, “ well,
you two little villains, if I can make nothing
of you, as sure as I live I will tell both your
fathers .”
“ My Lord,” said a fellow condemned to be
hanged for sheep-stealing, “ all I ask of your
Lordship is, that I shall not be hanged on Fri
day.” “Why?” asked the judge in surprise
“ Because,” was the answer, “ it is always coun
ted a mighty unlucky day!”
“ Never be critical upon thc ladies,” was the
maxim of an old Irish peer, remarkable for
his homage to thc sex ; “ the only way in the
world that a true gentleman ever will attempt
to look at the faults of a pretty woman, is to
shut his eyes.”
On the late importation of the colored and
figured French nightcaps, an Irish Baronet,
who made a purchase of half-a-dozen of dif
ferent patterns in Bond street, was asked, “ what
he ment to do with so many ?” “ Why, to be
sure, wear them all till I see which I like best.”
“ What! in the dark ?” “No ; I sleep with
a light in thc room.” “ But how does that
clear up the matter, if you arc once asleep ?”
“ Oh, thc clearest thing in the world. From
my cradle I had a habit of sleeping with my
eyes open.”
“ Is there any ford here ?” asked an English
tourist who came suddenly to a full stop before
one of the little mountain torrents of the west
of Ireland.—“ Oh, to be sure, your honor, there
was a ford,” said a peasan tstanding at the brink,
and making a hundred grimmaces of civility.
“ When was it!” said the tourist. “Before
the bridge was built,” said the peasant; “ but
when man and horse went over the bridge, the
tlie ford got out of the habit.” “Well, now
that the bridge is broken down, I suppose the
ford may have got into the habit again. Is it
safe ?” “To lie sure, your honor, all but in
thc middle, but that is nothing ; and if you can
swim, there is not a better ford in the country.”
“ But I cannot swim.” “Then, your honor,
thc only safe way that I know of, is, as soon
as you get out of your depth, to walk back
again.”
“ If we go to law,” said a wealthy landholder
to his tenant, “ wc go into Chancery, and out
of Chancery neither of us will ever get till we
get into our graves.” “ I am of thc same
opinion ; I want to get into neither the one
nor thc other; so let us go to a reference,”
said the tenent; “ and if the reference does
not satisfy us, let the matter he settled as usual,
by an umpire.” “ Well, be it so, but on this
condifion,” said the man of wealth, “ that, if he
cannot make a decision, we shall have umpires
on both sides.”
Blackwood’s Magazine.
GOING THE ENTIRE.
A fellow was recently met in great haste go
ing towards a pill manufactory in one of our
northern cities. “Hallo,Jim, which way,now,
so fast ?” “ The fact is I have taken two boxes
of fashionable pills, directions, boxes and all
without doing me any good. I’m going to
swallow the agent now, to see what effect he
will have.”
For the Southern Post.
Lines selected from Jliss JI. L. S—'s Album.
“ There doth Beauty dwell,
Most conspicuous, even in outward shape,
Where dawns the high expression of a mind.
In life’s young hour, how sweet the charm
Os Love and Beauty’s pow'r
No dreams of future ills alarm,
No woes and disappointments low’r.
The mind is calm while Beauty breathes,
And Love in Beauty’s seen ;
For Hope, on wings triumphant,, wreathes
A garland bright and evergreen.
That garland decks the youthful brow,
It points to future bliss;
It whispers go, and lowly bow
At Beauty’s shrine, for happiness.
And oft we bow supinely low,
With souls exulting high—
And find her shrine, the shrine of woe,
Where Hope and Love, and Pleasure die.
The roseate bloom soon fades and dies,
The lilly droops its head ;
The pencil’d brow —the lustrous eyes,
Can charm no more, for Beauty’s fled.
Where now the garland Hope had wove ?
Where now sweet days of bliss ?
The garland’s dead !it died in Love !
The victim mourns in wretchedness.
Then wisdom speaks, aye, wisdom cries I
Let earthly Beauty shine ;
Love only that which never dies,
The living Beauty of the Mind. W.
Warrenton, Georgia
Among tlie sufferers by the recent fi re at
New Haven, was an industrious mechanU 1
named William C. Baldwin. At the fi ie one
Isaiah Gale, who rejoices in the possession of
a head, but never heard of a soul, attached a
small remnant of Mr. Baldwin’s propertv to
secure a debt of fifty-nine dollars. S uc "h a
man ought to be hurried where the sun never
rises.— New- York Paper. 1
Let’s pass him round, and gather the opin.
ions of the press concerning him. We think
he ought to be made to get a living by chew
ing paper rags of the dirtiest sort
Argus. J
He ought to be winked at by lightning bugs, 1
sneezed at by musquitoes,and grinned to death
by wild cuts.— Bungtown Chronicle.
His raiment and food should be sack-cloth
and ashes—the latter from the ruins of the
victims.— N. Y. Star.
We think he should be compelled to live on
ink soup until his countenance is changed to
the blackness of his heart, and then to be em.
balmed in a bag of ashes forty days and forty
nights.— Rich. {ln.) Pal.
He should be ‘ tetotaciously exfiunchcated.’
Watchman.
He should be condemned to go on foot all
the days of his life up and down Yellow Creek
hills, hunting a colt, and be knocked on the
head by an old grey horse at last.— TFeshr/i
Herald.
Ho ought to make a contract with Amos
Kendall to carry the mail and get cheated out
of his pay. He ought to sleep on an Arkan.
sas fiat on a summer night without a mus.
quito bar—be condemned to marry two wives
and live with them—wait at Wellsville three
days for a steam-boat, and then have one go
past and not stop—to read the Globe regular.
Iv—sleep in a room with one who snores—be
wiggled to death by pollywogs, and buried in
a tar barrel.— Wheeling Times.
The wretch should be compelled to read Eli
Moore’s Speech and Bennett’s Herald—phy
sic off the same with lobelia—and finally end
his miserable career by being kicked to death
by lame grasshoppers !—Keep him agoing.—
Hudson River Chronicle
lie should be compelled to have his name
printed on his hat in large letters while he lives,
and engraved on his tombstone after his death.
Pass him o n.-~-Alluny Daily Advertiser.
In the first place let him be lathered with
hot tar, and shaved with a broken glass bottle.
Secondly, make him dance a double shuffle
on a heated iron floor, and when tired almost
to death, let him rest himself on a three prong,
cd pitchfork. Thirdly, drive him naked thro’
a nursery of full grown barbery bushes, and
afterwards kiver him up in a salt barrel.—
Fourthly, sentence him to feed on Graham
bread for six months, and then make him read
the Bangor Daily papers, and Harry Williams'
speeches. If any thing is left of him, push
him along neighbors.— Boston Herald.
The unfeeling monster should be made to
cross the Altamaha on the back of an Alliga
tor, or closely pursued by a deputy sherriff and
then sent to Florida to fight thc Seniino'es.
If thc Indians did not “use him up,” he should
be compelled to read two or three numbers of
the Boston Herald for his breakfast, and dine
on one of Harrington’s still-born plays.—
Brunswick Advocate.
[The cold blooded villian ! plain murder is too good
for him—scalp him and scrape his skull for the benefit
of the science —make him sell three loads of false-pack'
ed Cotton in Macon every day, and be— cooned. The
Shylock! his house should be set on fire, and he te
made to sit on the chimney-top and fiddle himself to
death. —Devil.]
A Next) Invention. —We were a short time
since invited by Mr. Robert McCarty to wit
ness an experiment of propelling balls without
the agency of powder or steam, from a gun of
an altogether novel description, invented by
him some two or more years since, and put in
operation about a year since. We saw it in
operation with balls weighing nearly a pound,
and judge it would throw with perfect ease from
500 to a 1000 halls per minute. We under,
stand Mr. McCarty is about building sonic
heavy guns on his plan for government.—
lie can throw from an ounce to a thirty-two
pound ball, and can Ire directed to any object
at pleasure. No recoil, or inconvenience from
heated barrel. He has a portable battery to
protect those operating in the field from mus.
ketry or grape. The balls are let into the cen.
tre, and discharged out of a barrel on the peri'
phery of a circle, the ball going off on a tan.
gent. He can give the balls the velocity ot
fourteen miles per minute. We think there is
no calculating the value of the invention. Y e
undetstand that some pirates have been trying
to rob Mr. McCarty of the invention in this
country, have failed, and have lately started (ot
Europe. They will, no doubt, when they
rive there meet their reward, and we hope th*
inventor will his. n. Y. Evening Star.
Grace After Meat. —One day at the table
of thc late Dr. Pcarse, (Dean of Ely) just as
the cloth was being removed, the subject o
discount happened to that of an extraordinarv
mortality amongst the lawyers. “We have
lost,” said a gentleman, “ not less than six erni'
nent barristers in as many months.” The deal /
who was quite deaf, rose as his friend finishe
his remarks, and gave the company grace
“ For this and every other mercy , the Loro ?
name be praised,” The effect was irresis
tible.