Newspaper Page Text
with tiio ex torn al portions of the
system; the certain effects o r
air, cheerfulness, temperance,
and of exercise, uninterrupted by
any species of unnatural con
straint. Southern Telescope.
rr< v,? \n r g? \* na7\ t? ™ a
W W w;L W■> m W WH J
For the Southern Poet.
(3.) THE SCRIBBLER.
OLD BACH BLOKS.
“ Good lord! on what a slender thread hangs man
without a wife.”
Old Bachelors ! ye musty spe
cimens of humanity—nave at ye !
“ hammer and tongs.” Here is a
mittimus lor you—a ticket for ad
mission into IMuto’s regions, tho’
it »s a matter of doubt whether
M ans. Charon will give you a pas
sage across til Styx or not : for
my own part 1 believe that all the
wandering, “ unshrined” restless
sp*nts which haunt church-yards,
old houses and lonely spots, are
notiiing but the unquiet souls of
Old Bachelors. The ghost of a
married man would never he out
so late of nights—“cavorting” a
bout like a Jackalantern !
“ G ve me a sheet of paper broad as Congress Hall,
A pen of cane reed split wit h a broad axe,
Oceans of ink as black as adder’s gall,
And vig’rous nerves as touirh as cobbler’s wax,”
That L may write how much I
hate a rank old bachelor. One
that you can “nose” at a half
mile ol a windy morning, in
chivalry a bachelor was the low
est order, and so as a member of
the human family is he one of the
lowest, meanest grades ; a fungus
upon society, a scare-crow to vir
tue and good feeling ; a lump of
concentrated selfishness; a su
p 'Mounted -oo ; a m m without a
soui—what is meaner than an old
bach dor : With no one to care
for nun, remind him of his forties,
and wanderings from the paths of
rcctitud", or to solace him in the
hour ot trouble. His whole life
is gen Tally nude up of riot and
debaucheries. The opinion of
the Uetter part of mankind has
always been against this class o*‘
unfortunate, voluntary outcasts.
From the creation of Eve in Para
dise, when the Creator himself
declared “ It is not good that man
should be alone,” unto the pre
sent time, Anno Domini, &c. the
ear h, notwithstanding their exis
tence, might become depopulate,
or what is worse, be tilled up with
a tartherless, illegitimate race of
vice and folly. The every-diy
life and habits of one of these an
imals is description enough : just
peep fora moment into his dwel
ling place—some lone chamber
waere these twenty years the spi
ders have been weaving hangings,
in pity, to shut out from daylight
and the human ken the dingy,
blackened walls. If you are a
person of sensitive feelings at all,
hold your breath, for your sto
mach's sake, as you step over the
threshold ; the atmosphere is re
dolent of smells; the floor perhaps
is covered with dirt, tobacco spit
tle, cigar ends and old papers.—
It is furnished with a crazy table,
ornamented with decks of cards,
W'li 1 bottles, foul tumblers, and
liquid traces of the last nights’
oarouse ; scattered around in ad-
mirable confusion arc some half a
dozen treacherous seats, called
chairs, broken backed and limp
ing with hard usage. A matted
nest of “ straw, feathers and foul
ticking” graces one corner of this
den, the covering to which is like
Joseph’s coat, torn and of many
colors; under this bed, and in
each corner, is an eternity of
mouldy hoots, toeless and topless,
solelss shoes and shoeless soles,
old hats, cast-off clothing, news
papers and pamphlets, broken
bottles and fragments of stockings
musty with wear. If there is a
shell, desk or “ roosting place”
in the room, it is generally adorn
ed with vials of all sizes, and
from snowy white to sooty in co
lour and condiment, packages of
patent medicines, for “ the heart
ache and the thousand natural
shocks that flesh is heir to,” la
belled in blue, brown and yellow,
handsomely vairegated, with pill
boxes, soda powders, bear’s
grease, cologne and different cos
metical humbugs. His time is
spent each night, until late, in
card or bacchannalian parties,
and he lies a-bed in consequence
until nine or ten in the morning,
then, arising heavy and dispirited,
his clothes are in sad disorder—
his shirts minus the bottoms, his
stocking out at the heels, his
h indkerchtefs unhemmed, and
this or that garment ruined for
want of “ a stitch, in time,” as
poor Richard used to say. He is
in a continual st :tt of feverish
excitement, ferment and pi rplexi
ty ; the sight of a woman, or
glance of every “ stranger lady,”
causes him to tremble for his per
sonal appearance ; something is
always wrong, a wrinkle in ins
unmentionables, a “ bad fit” of a
hoot, a wry lock of hair—if any—
the fever of the brain consequent
upon a s'ate of celibacy causeth
one to lose his hair much sooner
than a married foul
spot upon his vesture or linen may
give him the bines for a whole
day, someone has used his best
“ Jean Maria Farina,” stolen his
Havanas, used his clothes brush
in tiie hair, or hid his favorite
brandy bottle, and becomes crab
bed and sour as a crab orchard,
at surly as an overgrown bear or
bengal tiger, and spiteful as a
snipping armadilla; premature
old age gathers upon him, in con
sequence of his indulgences, and
he suffers death an hundred times
over in the formation of every
villianous wrinkle, thickening up
on his cherished phiz like fur
rows after the ploughman, and
deepening like gutters in a rain
storm on a Georgia side-hill.—
This is a bachelors life; all his
benevolences and charities “ be
gin and end , at home mere
sensualist; self is his guiding
star—of course he is boorish and
ungentleinanly in his manners and
carriage. The world has been
too lenient in affixing old bache
lorism at so late a period in life,
it should commence at 25 years
ot age. A man has no excuse for
retiming single after that time in
life. Now a female is differently
Situated in this respect; she can
make no advances without com
promising her modesty and bring
ing reproach upon herself, per
haps from the very person she
would wish to secure in the silken
bonds of Hymen as an husband ;
she may not have had a suitable
offer, or may be waiting in hopes
of one from someone whom her
heart has chosen. But a male
human has no such palliatives—a
large garden js before him and he
can chose one to suit himself
somewhere. Every man has some
thing about him to please some
body ; either in personal or men
tal attractions, or both, unless he
be a perfect Caliban in body and
mind. No Old Bachelor it is pro
bable will ever be admitted into
heaven. The enquiry will be
made, “What good have you
done on earth ?” “ Have you
done anything to benefit or per
petuate the human race?” “Have
you attended to that first com
mand from God to man, to i be
fruitful, multiply and replenish the
earth ?’ ” “ Alas ! not one of
them we attended to !” and you
will hear that sentence thundered
in your ears of “ depart ye cur
sed” as ye have lived on earth to
taka the lowest place in hell. If
there are any grades in Pluto’s re
gions, there is no doubt but that
old bachelors will be classed a
mong lowest, like cooks and
scullions on the earth. Love up
on earth is knowledge in heaven.
The person who possesses the
most love while on the one, will
possess the most knowledge and
he exalted to the highest rank and
station in the other. Old bache
lors are incapable of the tender
passions and emotions, therefore
they must rank very low, if any
should by crook or twist happen ;
to squeeze, into heaven, which is i
not at all probable. A brandy \
drinking, lying, selfish set, “ I’il
none of you.” Q.
Vineville , September 14, 1837.
IA@D>Ho
SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 16,1837.
03” “ Medicus” could not be inserted this week,
in consequence of its length and the necessity we
are under of using large type. It will appear in our
next.
OCr A fire broke out yesterday, in a workshop,
near the Rev. Mr. Sinclair's, in Vineville—it was
consumed. No other damage done. Engine No. 2,
was promptly manned, and showed an anxious dis
position to do their duty, but their services were not
needed.
S3* The weather has been cool enough for a few
evenings pust to require woollen clothing : fires look
ed very comfortable.
83* Oration, fcv the Honorable Henry L Pinck
ney, of South-C*.olina, delivered before the Literary
Societies of Franklin College, for sale by Messrs.
Griffin &, Purse.
03" The Sexton reports one interment, that of a
white infant, for the week ending to-day.
PRESIDENT’S MESSAGE.
The great length of this document precludes en
tirely the possibility of our laying before our readers
anything more of it, than a brief abstract of its lead
ing features It is principally taken up with a dis
cussion of the causes which have led to the late and
present embarrased state of the monetory concerns
of the country —witholding, until the annual meeting
of Congress, information as to the general state of
the Union.
The late and present embarrasment he attributes,
chiefly, to over action in all the departments of busi
ness, deriving its impulses from antecedent causes—
such as the immense and sudden expansion of Bank
capital and Bank issues einco 1831; the vast in*
crease of credit acquired by means of foreign loans,
contracted by the States and State institutions— and
the lavish auc ji.tniodauon extended by foreign deal
ers io our merchants.
Tiie of thisieiundancy of credit and
of the spirit of speculation, he alleges it to have en
gendered ; was, the creation ol a foreign debt of
j n,ore than thirty millions. The extension of credit
! to tradei-3 in the interior for supplies greatly beyond
j the wants ol the people ; the investment of forty mil
aorih of collars in unproductive lands in 1835 and 36 ;
| the eieation ol debts to an almost countless amount,
tor real estate in existing or anticipated cities or vil
lages ; tne diversion to oilier pursuitsoi niucu ol the
labor mat should have been applied to agriculture,
tnereby leading to heavy importations of gram in
addition to many otner injurious resuits not enumer
ated ; tne rapid grow tn among ad classes, but espe
cially in the large commercial cities of luxurious Jia
ons, louudeo too often on merely landed weal in, and
detioriental anke to the resources, industry and the
morals ol tue people.
I ire flanks selected to recieve the public monies
unuer tiie regulation ui tne ueposite law, having sus
pended specie payments, he urges the const.tutrona!
objections, winch lorbiu the receipt of depreciated
paper m payment 01 tne revenues, and recommends
the establishment ot sub-Treasury agencies, by
which he thinks the public treasure can saiely be
collected, kept anu disbursed. For a plan of tills
system he refers Congress to the Secretary of the
Treasury ; he urges the necessity of the government
being divorced from flanks entirety, and unqualifi
edly expresses h.s opposition to the creation of a Na
tional Bank by Congress.
DCr 3 Cotton crops are better
this year than the last. Corn and
wheat crops are good ; plenty of
the “ star! ol lile”—no lear ot star
ving. By-the-way, friend Hig
gins has established a Bakery,
[see his advertisement in this
paper,] where all sorts of good
Bread can be had by the needy ;
good news for the planter, bring
in your fiour.
DC? 3 It will be seen by an adver
tisement in our columns that the
1 heatrical season commences on
Monday next, with the play of the
“ Honey-Moon, or how to rule a
Wife.” Some misunderstanding
occasioned us to say that it would
open with “ Mazeppa,” which
will be played, however, during
the stay of the Company.
tTT Matthew Hall McAllister
has been elected Mayor of the
the City of Savannah, and Henry
L. Pinckney Mayor of Charles
ton.
DC? 3 We were present at the de
bate, mentioned in our last to be
held in the Court House, on last
Tuesday evening—Rev. Mr. Cas
sells presiding; the disputants
manifested a thorough knowledge
of the subject they had chosen.—
A large and respectable audience
attended, and by their frequent
and animated cheers manifested
their pleasure and approbation.
CC7 3 A great deal of wrangling
in Congress about matters of lit
tle importance, compared with
those for which they were con
vened. Not a word, as yet, about
the embarrassed state of the coun
try. Party spirit seems to go
vern the movements of the whole
body. We fear that little will he
done to materially benefit the
country, during the present ses
sion, if indeed it be in the power