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(Jerald and fldcerli«r.
NEWNAN, FRIDAY,
FEB. 18.
ONE DOLLAR A
YEAB.
Texas’ Fool Laws.
Montgomery Advertiser.
The more we learn of recent Texas
legislation the more we are surprised
that any body of men in their sober
senses should have enacted BUch laws.
A few days since we alluded to some of
them, and to their absurdities, but since
then our attention has been called to
some others that are even more vul
nerable than any we referred to.
For example, the lawmakers decided
that certain telephone abuses should be
corrected, so they enacted a very per
fect law, as they thought, which would
remove all complaints on the part of
those who own telephones. Now that
the law has gone into effect it is discov
ered that any pereon UBing the tele
phone of another is guilty of a felony
and may bo sent to the penitentiary.
Under this law a patron of a hotel can
not use the hotel ’phone; a visitor at
the home of another cannot use his
host's ’phone; a man who goes into an
office, store or shop on business is guil
ty of a felony if he uses the instrument
kept there. Of course, the legislators
never intended to pass such a law as
that, but they did it and it is now in
force—provided any effort is made to
enforce it, which we seriously doubt.
Plainly it 1b not possible to enforce it
generally, because it would be impossi
ble to detect all violations of it.
Then there !b another law which has
been exposed since it went into effect,
which is about as absurd and unjust as
the other. The Te^cas lawmakers, like
their brethren in a number of other
States, plainly thought that the entire
country would go to “the demnition
bow-wows" if anybody should be al
lowed to ride on a train on a free pass.
They were in the reforming business,
and looked on any one who gives or ac-
-cepts a railroad pass as a very undesir
able citizen, so they enacted a law that
they thought would fix things, and it
has. Investigation into both the letter
and spirit of the law shows that under
its provisions no child or infant in arms
can ride on any railroad in Texas with
out paying full faro! This discovery has
just about knocked some of them silly,
but it is the law and there is no way of
■dodging it, as can bo done in the tele
phone law. This railroad law can be
■enforced, and it will be manifestly to
the interest of the railroads to put it
rigidly into effect, for it would add ma
terially to passenger profits. When one
of the legislators who voted for the law
gets on a train with his children and ba
bies, and is forced to pay as much for
each of them as he does for himself, he
will feel like getting off somewhere and
-asking somebody to kick him.
Then there is certain insurance legis-
jation that was found to be loaded.
Among other things in the insurance law
as passed is a provision that companies
engaged in that business must deposit
certain securities with the State Treas
urer. As soon as the law went into ef
fect the manager of an insurance com
pany carried to the Treasurer some se
curities, telling that official that he had
no right under the law to examine into
the value or validity of the securities
offered, but must accept them for what
they purported to be. Examination of
the statute shows that this assertion is
correct, and the Treasurer must take
whatever is offered him in the shape of
securities, whether they are worth any
thing or not.
Those are some examples of Texas
legislation, and they show how easily
inexperienced legislators can make ab
surd and inefficient laws. In their anx
iety to correct what they consider a
wrong or abuse, they hurry a law
through without knowing whether it
can or should be enforced. In this way
laws get on the statute books which
are not worth the paper they are print
ed on, and others passed which, if en
forced, would be an outrage on any
people or community. So far as we
have kept up with the procession, Tex
as can go up head.
Sore Lungs and Baw Lungs.
Most people know the feeling, and
the miserable state of ill health it in
dicates. All people should know that
Foley's Honey and Tar, the greatest
throat and lung remedy, will quickly
cure the soreness and cough and restore
a normal condition. Ask for Foley’s
Honey and Tar. Sold by all druggists.
LOVE iNO FLOWERS.
The Advice a( Discerning Woman Dave
Unto Her Daughter.
My daughter, wonldst tbou know a
man's secrot7 Go to the florist, then,
O simple one, for In him every mon
repoeetb bis confidence.
Tea, by the flowers which be sendetb
a woman shall ye judge the quality
of a man’s love, likewise the quantity
and exact stage.
As violets pass unto roses, and roses
unto cheap carnations, and carnations
unto naught, so passeth bis grand pas
sion from the first throes Into matri
mony.
Lo, at the beginning of a love affair
mark with what care a man selectetb
his flowers In person, that not a wilted
violet shall offend thine eyes!
Tet as time pnssctb ho telephoneth
his orders and leaveth It all to the
clerk. And there cometh a day when
he murmuroth wearily, “I say, old
chap, make that a standing order, will
you?”
Then the florist henveth a sigh, for
ho knowetb that tho end Is at hand.
Yen, this Is tho mark of an engaged
man who dooth Ills duty. So after the
wedding bouquets all orders shall
cense together, and until he seeketh
flowers for his wlfe’B grave that man
shnll not again enter a florist's shop.
For stale carnations, bought upon
the street corner and carried home In
a paper bng, are a lit offering for any
wife. Tet a funeral rcjolceth tho flor
ist's heart and maketh him to smile,
for ho knowetb that a widower's next
order shall bo worthy of a new cause
and the game shall begin all over
again.
Verily, verily, my daughter, I charge
thee, account no man In love until he
hath gone forth Into the gardens and
tho fields and plucked thee a few dinky
pansies or stray weeds with bis own
hands.
For when a man sendeth thee violets
It may mean only sentiment, and when
he sendeth thee orchids It may be only
n bluff, but when he doeth real work
for any woman It meaneth business.
Selahl—London Tlt-Blts.
HAD LUCK ON THE WAY.
The English Thief Thct Dropped In to
See His Lawyer.
Here Is a story of a genuine Instance
of tho kind of business which fell to
the lot of a once notorious London
“thieves' counsel.” One day a thick
set man, with a cropped poll of un
mistakably Newgate cut, slunk Into
this counsel's room, when the follow
ing dialogue took place:
“Morning, sir,” said the man, touch
ing his forelock,
“Morning,” said the counsel. “What
do you want'/"
•Well, sir, I'm sorry to say, sir, our
llttlo Ben, sir, has ’ad a mlsfortin.
Fust offense, sir, only a wipe."
“Well, well!" Interrupted the coun
sel. “Get on"—
“So. sir, we thought ns you’d 'nd all
the fnmlly business we’d like you to
defend him, sir.”
“All right," said the counsel; "see
my clerk”—
"Yes, sir,” continued the thief, "but
I thought I’d like to make sure you’d
attend yourself, sir. We’re anxious
cos It's llttlo Ben, our youngest kid.”
“Ob, thnt will be all right! Give
Simmons the fee."
“Well, sir," continued the man, shift
ing about uncomfortably, “I was go
ing to arst you. sir, to take a little
less. You see, Blr"—wheedllngly—“It’s
little Ben—his first mlsfortin”—
"No, no!" said the counsel Impa
tiently. • “Clenr outl"
“But, sir, you've had all our busi
ness. Well, sir, if you won’t you
won't, so I'll pay you now, sir." And
as he doled out the guineas, “I may
as well tell you, sir, you wouldn’t ’a’
got the counters If I hadn’t had a little
bit of luck on the way.”—From “The
Recollections of a K. 0„” by Thomas
Edward Crtspe.
An Episcopal minister was going
through the mountain districts of North
Carolina. He stopped at the door of an
humble dwelling and knocked. The door
was opened by a yellow-faced woman.
She nodded. (It is a peculiarity of
these mountain people not to speak un
less spoken to.)
“My good woman," said the clergy
man, ‘ 'can you tell me if there are any
Episcopalians around here?"
"My son kills all them kind o’ var
mints,” she said, "and their skins is all
hangin' up on the back porch. You kin
go out there and see if you kin fin’ one
of them."
An attack of grip is often followed
by a persistent cough, which to many
proves a great annoyance. Chamber-
la n's Cough Remedy has been exten
tm ely used and with good success for
the relief and cure of this cough. Many
cases have been cured after all other
■remedies had failed. Sold by all dealers,
Funny For Hor.
A New England lad was Intently
watching his aunt In the process of
making pies and cake. He seemed
very much Inclined to start a conver
sation, an Inclination, however, which
the aunt In no way encouraged. She
continued In silence to assemble the
ingredients of a mammoth coke.
“Tell me something funny, auntie,”
finally ventured the boy.
Don’t bother me. Tommy,” said the
aunt "How can I when I am making
cake?”
"Oh. you might say, 'Tommy, have a
piece of the pie I've just made.’ That
would be funny for you.”—Exchange;
Waited Twenty Years For a Solution
A bit of pure and harmless mischief
at recitation at Ynle was the device
of n member of tho class of '72, who
introduced at recitation a turtle covered
by a newspaper pasted on the shell.
Tho tutor hnd too much pride to come
down from his perch and solve the
mystery of the newspaper movement,
but twenty years after, meeting
member of tbe class, hts first and ab
rupt question was, "Mr. W., what
made thnt paper move?"
A COMEDIAN’S TRICfc.
Rue# by Which Ha Escaped Arrest
and Had Hie Debts Paid.
Many amusing stories are told of Joe
Haines, a comedian of the time of
Charles II., sometimes called “Count”
Haines. It Is said that he was arrest
ed one morning by two bailiffs for a
debt of £20, when be saw a bishop to
whom he was related passing along In
his coach. With ready resource he im
mediately saw a loophole for escape,
and, turning to the men, be said, “Let
me speak to his lordship, to whom I
am well known, and be will pay the
debt and your charges into the bar
gain."
The bailiffs thought they might ven
ture this, as they were within two or
three yards of the coach, and acceded
to tbe request Joe boldly advanced
and took off his hat to the bishop. His
lordship ordered the coach to stop,
when Joe whispered to tho divine that
the two men were suffering from such
scruples of conscience that he feared
they would hang themselves, suggest
ing that his lordship should Invite
them to his house and promise to sat
isfy them. The bishop agreed, and,
calling to the bailiffs, he said, “You
two men come to me tomorrow morn
ing, and I will satisfy you!"
The mon bowed and went away
pleased, and early the next day wait
ed on his lordship, who, when they
were ushered In, said, "Well, my men,
what are these scruples of con
science?"
"Scruples?" replied one of them.
“We have no scruples I We are bai
liffs, my lord, who yesterday arrested
your cousin, Joe HalneB, for a debt of
£20, and your lordship kindly promised
to satisfy us.”
The trick was strange, but the re
sult was stranger, for his lordship,
either appreciating Its cleverness or
considering himself bound by the
promise he had unintentionally given,
there and then settled with the men In
full.
A CHINESE SOLOMON.
His Decision In ■ Csss of a Woman
With Two Husbands. —
There was a Chinese judge named
Wang, who was as wise as Solomon.
Before Wang two men and a woman
appeared. The older man was the wo
man’s first husband. He bad gone to
the wars and been reported dead. Now
ho returned alive to claim his wife.
But she meanwhile had married tbe
younger mnn, who refused to give her
up; hence all three came before Wang
that he might decide this truly difficult
case.
Yang Kl,” said the judge to the wo
man, “which of these two men made
the better husband?”
Both wore perfect husbands, my
lord judge," Tang Kl modestly replied.
So the Judge told the men that he
would keep the woman by him for a
week, examining her thoroughly, and
week hence he would decide the
case. Well, the week passed, and the
two husbands came once more before
the judge. He shook his head gravely
and said to them:
,“The woman, Yang Kl, has died.
There Is no case. Let her original hus
band tako the body away from my
house and pay for the burial.”
'Ho, not II” said the original hus
band. And, so saying, he darted from
the court and was soon lost to view.
“You, then,” said the judge to the
other man, “must stand these burial
expenses.”
'Yes,” the man answered, "that Is
just, and I will give this woman, who
was good and kind, the finest burial
my purse will allow.”
The judge clapped his hands. Yang
Kl, blushing and smiling, entered the
courtroom In a rich dress of gold bro
cade.
"Take her,” said the wise Judge, “for
you and not the other merit her love
and service.”
How the Rash Comat.
In measles a rash appears on the
fourth day of the fever. It Is first
seen on the forehead, face and neck,
afterward over the whole body. It
consists of raised red spots. In scarlet
fever the rash appears on the second
day of the fever, commencing on the
upper part of the chest and neck,
whence It spreads over the body. In
smallpox an eruption Is seen on the
third or fourth day on the face, neck
and wrists. In chicken pox the erup
tion Is made of small blebs. In typhoid
fever the rash rarely shows itself be
fore the seventh day of the fever. The
spots are rose colored, and they disap
pear on pressure.
Diplomatic Politeness.
There are two kinds of politeness,
politeness to yourself and politeness to
others.
When you come home late at night,
for example, even 11| you are very
tired, always remove you hat and coat
before getting Into bed. It Is little
attentions like this that constitute you
a gentleman. At the same time, do
' not disturb your wife if you can pos
sibly avoid It It Is the height
rudeness to awaken a sleeping lady.-
Thomas L. Masson In Llpplncott’s,
A Relief.
“Johnny," said the boy’s mother, “I
hope you have beeu a nice, quiet boy
at school this afteruoou."
“That's what I was," answered John
ny. “1 went to sleep right after din
ner. and the teacher said she'd whip
any boy In the room who waked me
up."—Boston Post.
The Change.
"You didn't use to object to your hus
band playing poker.”
“No, but that was before I learned
to play bridge. It is a lovely game,
but I cannot afford to play It unless he
stops playing poker.”—Houston Post
of
Confidence.
Mr. Golding—So you want to marry
my daughter. Do you think that ;
can support her In the style to which
she has been accustomed? Jack Win
some—No, sir, but I can support her
a good deal better style than you lived
In the first five years after you were
married.—Somerville Journal.
An Easier Dose.
Johnny—The medicine ain't so nasty
as It useter be, mommer. I’m gettln'
used to it Mommer—Do you take
whole spoonful every hour? Johnny—
No’m; I couldn't find a spoon, so rm
usin’ a fork.—Cleveland Leader.
v • /
j
W.75
The 1910 Subsci
Oiler Made
•lotion Olfer-The Best
for the New Year
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ers, author of Uncle Bemus folk-lore and other sketches. It is the magazine of the whole Southland, it
is as broad as the nation in its scope and its success is confined to no section.
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folks, people in the. public, eye now, that you want to know about, and it is of absorbing interest from cover
to cover. Be sure to subscribe now in lime to get tho next great issue.
(3) Talks From Fanners to Farmers, a symposium of Southern farm knowledge that Bhould be in
the hands of every practical farmer, young or old. The articles have all appeared in Tri-Weekly Con
stitution under Bame title and made one of the greatest features of this splendid farmers’ paper. It will
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HERALD AND ADVERTISER, Newiian, Ga.
There is no drug that can be taken
into the system regularly without
working harm. Every drug has a sec
ondary effect as well as a primary one.
The immediate effect is all a man
thinks of when he takes it; but the sec
ondary effect follows just as inevitably.
It is of an entirely different nature and
it is always bad. For example, the sec
ondary effect of most of the coal-tar
headache powders is to reduce the num
ber of red corpuscles in the blood,
whose business it is to carry oxygen to
all parts of the body.
Shake Into Your ShoeB
Allen’s Foot-Ease, a powder,- It cures
painful, swollen, smarting, nervous feet
and instantly takes the sting out of
corns and bunions and makes walking
easy. Try it to-day. Sample free. Ad
dress Allen S, Olmsted, LeRoy, N. Y.
Two old ladies, both of whom were
well cared for, were once conversing
about their affairs. One was a jolly
old lady, the other was of a sour dispo
sition. "
“Well, well,"said the jolly one, “it’s
pleasant to be old. We get the best of
everything—the easiest chairs, the best
places, the tenderest morsels—”
“Yes, yes,” sighed the other, forced
to admit that her life was an easy
one, “that’s all very true, but what’s
the use? We can’t be old but once.”
There’s a Tone
About This Store
That Makes Buying Here
A Pleasure —
You’ll find our large and varied
stock is an educator in good eatables.
Products from every clime and
cation are gathered oh our shelves
and counters.
Swiss Cheese, Holland Herring,
Russiau Caviar, Scotch Marmalade,
the best condiments of Snglish and
domestic makers, teas from China,
and an unsurpasMd line of coffees.
One of our beat*liked brands is tbe
famous
Electa Coffee
a select quality, with the virile coffee
flavor retained. There is as much
difference between Electa and com*
mon coffee, as between morn and
midnight. Perfected processes of
cooking and curing make it superior.
The quality is always the
same—always the highest,
because all Electa Coffee is
selected by experts and
# cup-tested.
^ Try a pound can. ^
T. L. Camp, Newnan, G.
All kinds of job work done
with neatness and dispatch
at. this office
FOfflfS'OWNOLMnVE
' row Stomach TSoutz «nd.CoM»T»VATtMt
Newnan Hardware Co.
Long-handled Strapped Ferrule
flanure Forks
4-tine Forks, 60c.
6-tine Forks, 60c.'
6-tine Forks, 75c.
Long-handled round-point ShovelB, 60c., 75c. and $1.
Disston’s Hand Saws, $1.66 and up.
Lanterns, 60c. and up—the best made.
Hunting Coats, $1.60 and up.
I |
Our lino of Cooking Stoves and Ranges can’t be beat anywhere.
guarantee every stove we sell. All we want is a trial order.
We carry Heating Stoves from $2.26 up to as high as you wantth
We
carry Heating Stoves from $2.26 up to as high as you want them.
Our line of Pocket and Table Cutlery is complete.
Come to see us.
Newnan Hardware Co.,
GREENVILLE STREET,
Telephone 148.
Wl'l
WHEN IN NEED OF
LUMBER AND PLANIN'
MILL STUFF
Of all kinds—Brackets, Mouldings, Columns, etc.—you
find it to your interest to give us a call.
HOUSE BILLS A SPECIALTY
Vulcanite Roofing
R. D.Cole ManufacturingCj
49-54 E. Broad St J NFWNAN, GA., ’Phone 14.
Physicians Advise
the use of a goodlaxative, to keep the bowels open and prevent the poisons of undlgel
food from gettinginto your system.
The latest product of science is VELVO Laxative Liver Syrup, purely vegetable, gei.
reliable and of a pleasant, aromatic taste. Velvo acts on the liver, as well as ort|
stomach and bowels, and Is of the greatest possible efficacy in constipation, indlgesi
biliousness, sick headache, feverishness, colic,flatulence, etc. Try \
VELVO
LAXATIVE
LIVER SYRIII