Newspaper Page Text
ioctors Can’t
Cure It!
trfT ; 0US blood poison is absolutely
,‘ft e gkill of the doctors. They
^ 0Be a patient for years on their
Fewer Failures.
Dun’s Commercial Review for
October 15th, says: “It has never
been possible to make a more sat
isfactory quarterly report of fail-
ures during the five years that are
covered by the returns made ex-
|ona
purirl and potash remedies, but hej c ^ ua * ve ^.y by this paper than can
ftftr be rid of the disease; on the i be made for the past Quarter
‘ n V. r a his condition will grow uaiL i ^
S. S. S. is the only cure . Wblle a few ve T heavy failures
‘ft terrible affliction, because it is ! swell the aggregate for the last
1 ft- remedy which goes direct to
erase of the disease and forces it
ftjhe system.
fleeted with Blood Poison, and the
tor's did me no good, though I took
doc _ v their treatment faith-
iK fully. In fact, I seemed
» to get worse all the
while. I took almost
StT*? every so-called blood
fit ■' remedy, but they did not
'T -fi&l seem to reach the dis-
iar^J>* ease, and had no effect
_ whatever. I was dis-
heartened, for it seemed
that I would never be
E s i cured. At the advice o*
’HS?" a friend I then tool:
S. S. S., and began toim-
<|uai tor, those in real estate, brok
erage or speculation alone count
ing for more than 11 per cent, of
the aggregate, with as much more
in operations not at all reflecting
the general state of business, the
aggregate was nevertheless small-"
er than in any other mouth cov
ered by our re tuns for many bran
ches of business. In some branches
/’ prove, i continued the th6 failures in September or in
L;.,* and it cured me completely, build- i 1 '
; «tilth and increasing ray appetite. ! August Were the smallest >n
L iffh thlr- was ten vears ago. I have never j
fad a of the disease to return. ^ 'month and also ill manv
n • It. iNEWMAN. # ^
Staunton,Va. 'failures for the quarter were the
like s^lf-destruction to continue i orT , 0 n, ir ,4. - , , n -,, ,
u iiKr . * , . smallest in auv Quarter T n ewhe*it
a j ce potash and mercury; besides . y ^ uauc1, wuul
ah-;^oying die digestion, they \ business is more active,with prices
any
others
the marrow in tne Dones, pro- l „u •*. o u • „i r n
inc a stiffness and swelling of the ft'"'' 1 c ~ Ct ' 8 ‘ higher f° r tpot and.
ftcaa ing the hair to fall out, and j nearly 3 cents for the December
.pietely wrecking the system. j option. The price of corn has ad-
^ fbi® A|l I vauced about 2 cts. though the
aJs i Il8 J3lUUll ’ recei P ts are just now larger than
larantoeu Purely Vegetable, and is ! 11 year ago
Ion
Rare Off Hand Speeches.
A group of literary^ young men
were dicussmg the other day the
rarity of spontaneous eloquence or
wit, says ti e Youth’s Companion.
“I was at dinner once in New
York,” said one, and was seated
next to Maj. Hay, who, you know
had been Lincoln’s secretary.
Somebody making a speech ex
claimed :
‘Iu .genuine eloquence the
words come hot from the heart.
No noble speech was ever uttered
• S %
in America than Lincoln’s address
at Gettysburg, and lam assured
it has wholly spontaneous. He
had not given it a thought before
he rose to speak. ’
“‘While he was delivering it, ”
said jVIaj. Hay to me, aside, ‘I had
the fifth copy of it in my pocket.”
“I, too, remember a dinner in
Ne.w York,” said another at which
all the foremost men in journalism
and literature were present. The
speech of the evening was made by
George W. Curtis. It sparkled
with wit and apt illusions to the
men present, evidently inspired by
the moment. Once he stopped,
interrupting himself, and exclaim-
The price of spot cot- led:
ly blood remedy free from these ; ton i s a sixteenth lower thi
n a} “ ‘I see my friend, Judge D.,
lupous minerals. , .
k on self-treatment sent free by j week ago and the January option j looking at me doubtfully, but I
pecitic Company, Atlanta, Ga. ; has also lost a few points, while j must remind him that he, too, ’•—
there is a weaker tone in the mar- going on with some brilliant rail-
quartermaster igo. I Railroad Engineer
ft Sf
An Up-to-Date Fable.
ket for goods. This is partly due
lery that brought dawn peals of
nee
,2.8, time there was a j to t ^ ie °® cia ^ admission that the laughter. As we rose to go out I
'f i w q u n a b 1 p to ctq | t*. 0 of piint cloths, now a six-1 said to tne emtoroi a B os ton pa-
i th fc ' ay* so fp acted as •• *-eenth below two cents, cannot be J per .
er in a bash house. Now this | sustained without a selling agency ! “‘Who but Curtis could pour
rut Alan was undoubetly j which ia now proposed.”- 'out impmmtu wit like that?’
er than he was dishonest but!
. Many of the distressing disorders pe-
ad tin tiers e to seek in Mar- • cu u ar to women are caused by dis-
the hand of tiie only daugh- ; eased conditions in the liyerand bow-
fa Bloated Aristocrat. The iat- j els - By restoring these organs to
0W3VGT W'«a: : sore oil the waiter ■ :iea tthy activity the regular functions
t \ .■ i J of the female organs are re-established.
, i A well tried remedy for nver troubles
g iLfeiutS to neap on ills nead j an( j disorders of the urinary organs is
Ugll me L aughter was Over; Dr. J. H. McLean’s Liver and Kidney
Itops ir love with the dashing Balm. Thousands of ladies have used
a £; -r. * One Bright but an< ^ sa A ^ 1S a ^ oon to suffering
-ri ^ . j womanhood. Price $1.00 per bottle,
pv l av the vouth w^as 3tand- ; T , . ^ „ %
‘ “ , ; For sale by M. C. Brown & Co.
n th c doorway of the beanery
IDZ
Biel] he waited for victims j
ieeatzLig htb it to come along |
suddenly a large cry of hor-
Ipuoctured the surrounding i
fnde, and dashing toward J>im
a madden:! steed, while with
ched lace the Blooded Aristo-
|who?e daughter he loved sat
fcleas in the fated vehicle. The
[but brave waiter saw his Gp-
unity and grasped it right by
tack of the neck. Rushing to
the madder d steed he shouted
as he was wont to do when
|g orders to the cook and
ftng the apron from about
son, ne Waved it Frantical-
tbe Air. The maddend ani-
jlben swerv 1 from its course
fcashiDg th^ friendly vehicle |
pt a lamp post flung the
pd Aristocrat out from ther-
m broke his proud neck. A
distance from the funeral
Ipoor
The Merry Jester.
Mrs. Farmside—Joshua, the
j tramps have robbed our clothes
line again.
Joshua—How r do you know it’s
tramps?
Mrs. Farmside—Because they
*‘ ‘impromptu?’ said the news
paper man. I had proofs of all
speeches given to me this after
noon to send to Botton to-nighj^
Let us look at his.’ We looked,
and there it was, w r ord for w r ord,
even the ‘I see my friend, Judge
D., looking at me doubtfully, etc
“I knew Artemus Ward,” said-a
third man, ‘when he was a report
er on a Cleveland paper. One
evening in the office he told a story,
apparently a mere trifle, the flash
of a moment.
“ ‘Brownie,’ said the cheif, ‘how
can you say such cleyer things off
hand?’
“Offhand!’ muttered Browne. ‘I
told that to myself fifteen times
this afternoon!’ Ten vears after-
have taken everything hut the d j beard him tell the same
! towels.—Judge.
First M. D.—I’ve just lost a pa
tient and feel the need of recrea
tion .
Second M. D.—Come around to
my office. I’m going to try some
experiments on a fine dog.—Life.
story to a brilliant London audi
ence, without the alternative of a
comma.”
“Even to make a good joke,” re
marked a listener, “work appar
ently is needed as well as genius.”
Mary—Teacher says history re
peats itself.
He—Here it tells of a doctor
w'ho says impoliteness is a dis
ease.
She—So it is. And in the
street car it is generally found to
"V"*. triumphant waiter be we n seated.—Philadelphia Bui-
up uis job and married the j,
r^giuer ci
and
the Dead Aris-
living
me} are now
|°itallo oif rbe life insurance
^—•ffride often gets it in the
0n t everything comes to him
paits—Chicago News.
Home For Sale.
J c a C'*c.- of land with good
p house anr oat buildings, good
;v uter, v. ’th about 400 fruit
' 11 L r ru r* vines; the land in
ft tf of cultivation. The place
ft 15 dighlat known as “Oak-
IfaM; out - a, .
“ 0!(5t i me incorporation
le SV‘i’ rp,
i. oropertvis located
?Oo:’
letin.
Barber (fishing for a compli
ment)—Did Mr. Stubbles say any
thing about his visit to my place?
Victim—I think he did. He
! said there w as something unique
I about your shaving.
Barber (delighted)—Did he,
now?
Victim—Yes; he said that while
in the chair it w r as borne in upon
you in the strongest manner that
you.were being shaved ; after you
jeft it was impossible to realize
that you had been shaved.—Boston
Transcript.
Old people suffer much from dis
orders of the kidnevs or urinary organs
and are always gratified the won
derful effect of I)r. J. H. Me Lean's Liv-
p ehea•
ttCignWhood, and cv.n be | er Hi3 j Kidney Balm in banishing their
ri - T. Hasgi*>ve.
Save The Children.
When children are attacked with
cough, cold and croup, Dr. Bull’s
Cough Syrup will prove a quick and
sure cure. Mr. Elmer E. Baker,
Blandon, Pa., w T rites: “We have
used Dr. Bull’s Cough Syrup for cough,
cold and croup, and found it the best
cough medicine and cure for these
affections. We never run out of it,
but always keep it on hand.” Dr.
Bull's Cough Syrup is sold everywhere
for 25 cents. Insist on having it.
troubles. Price Si.00 a bottle. For
sale by M. C. Brown & Co. „
Copper Tempered by Mound Builders.
Ed A. SohloCh has received from a
friend in Savannah, Bis., a long and
small spearhead, a small knife, an awl
and a needle taken from one of the pre
history e m otrads near that city The tools
are all of tempered copper, and when
suspended by a thread ri&g like steel.
They have been hammer&d out and tem
pered, and after having been buried in
a mound for no one knows how leng
still retain their temper. The mound
builders, who had disappeared from the
face of the earth before Columbus dis
covered this oountx-y, knew how to tem
per copper, an art which no man cn
earth has now, although many have en
deavored for years to discover the proc
ess. Such specimens arc found in but
few of the mounds opened, the iniple
ments found being generally of stone
MV Scbloth has a fins collection of rel
ics of mound builder^ and of the aborig
ines of this boast and values these tem
pered copper articles above them alL—
Portland OreyoniiSM-
la Officer From Michigan Who
Fuaou Daring the War.
“Service in the army, ” remarked the
veteran, “certainly tended to develop
characteristics, and if a soldier possess
ed peculiarities they were bound to
come out. Every regiment had among
its members one or more who became
known to everybody, who were distin
guished by a nickname, and to a certain
extent were privileged characters. Some
of these even achieved fame, and their
doings and sayings were ropeated
throughout the army. Among the most
noted of these in Buell’s command was
a regimental quartermaster from Michi
gan. On reporting at Louisville I war
ordered to take charge of a steamboat
loading with stores and ammunition for
Nashville. Nearly all the captains and
pilots on the southwestern rivers were
believed to sympathize with the seces
sionists, and it was presumed that thes*
gentlemen would not give way to grief
if the boats they were running, loaded
with government supplies, should be
captured at some convenient landing by
rebels. Hence the precaution of running
the boats under the direction of a Union
officer with a guard on their decks.
“On going aboard the boat to which
I had been assigned I was baited at the
gangway stairs by an undersized man
whose hair was several degrees beyond
auburn and whose accent savored of
Tipperary with the salutation:
“ ‘Who in thunder are you?’
“I produced the document from head
quarters, which he read over carefully
and with a profound bow handed back,
remarking:
“ ‘You’re all right and can go where
you like. I’ve been taking charge of this
craft because she needed a head, but I
resign. There’s a devil of a lot of our
fellows aboard. I’m Quartermaster IgoT
“This was my introduction to the
quartermaster. On the arrival of his
regiment at Louisville he had, or imag
ined he had, business with the quarter
master of the department and at once
proceeded to the large building occu
pied by that officer. Brushing aside an
interposing orderly and pushing open a
gate, he marched on through the sacred
inclosure until stopped by a dignified
end indignant gentleman, who curtly
informed him that he must remain out
side the railing.
“ ‘Who in thunder are you?’ demand
ed Igo.
“ ‘I am Colonel Swords, department
quartermaster. ’
“Igo coolly glanced over him from
head to heel and then asked:
“ ‘Don’t the government pay you?’
“‘Why, certainly, of course,’ an
swered the surprised West Pointer.
“ ‘Then why in thunder don’t you
wear brass buttons and things on your
shoulders so a fellow would know you
are the high cockalorum? How am I to
tell whether you are Colonel Swords or
Tom, Dick or the devil?’ With this he
turned and indignantly marched out.
“Soon after ho encountered the colo
nel in a public place and at once ac
costed him about business. He was im
mediately checked with the remark:
“ ‘Sir, when you have business with
me you will please call at my office. ’
“Later, when everything was being
hurried for un immediate departure of
the army, Colonel Swords, who was
riding out to the camp, met Igo riding
into the city.
“ ‘One moment, quartermaster,’ said
the colonel, bringing his horse to a
stand.
“‘Sir,’ said Igo, ‘when you have
business with ma you will please call
at my office. ’
“In the autumn of 1862 our regiment
relieved a detachment of troops posted
at a crossroads several miles from head
quarters, at Murfreesboro, Tenn. Ono
evening we received orders to return
immediately to town, and while pack
ing up a soldier found a box of papers
and reported the find. Investigation
showed them to be Quartermaster Igo’t
regimental accounts, and instruction!
were given to takedhem along and de
liver them to him the first opportunity.
This occurred at Murfreesboro, and the
box of papers was returned. On receiv
ing them Igo broke out:
“‘Well, this beats thunder. I’ve i
been losing these papers all over the [
state of Tennessee, and some blamed j
fool invariably finds them and brings 1
them back.' How are my accounts with j
the government ever to fco settled if 1 !
can’t certify that the papers are lost?*
“It was reported afterward that thf :
government had imperatively called up- j
on Igo to settle up, and in answer he |
had boxed up all his papers and for* 1
warded them to Washington with a let- j
ter stating that these were all the docu-1
ments, and as the department had plan
ty of clerks they could settle the a©
counts at . their leisure to auit them
•elves.”—New York Sun.
Testifies to Benefits Received From
Dr. Miles’ Remedies.
T HERE is DO more responsible position
on earth than that of a railroad engin
eer. On his steady nerves, clear brain,
bright eye and perfect self command, de
pend the safety of the train and the lives
of its passengers. Dr. Miles’ Nervine and
other remedies are especially adapted to
keeping the nerves steady, the brain clear
and the mental faculties unimpaired.
Engineer F. W. McCoy, formerly of 1323
Broadway, Council Bluffs, but now residing
at 3411 Humboldt St., Denver, writes that he
“suffered for years from constipation, caus
ing sick, nervous and bilious headaches and
was fully restored to health by Dr. Miles*
Nerve & Liver Pills. I heartily recommend
Dr. Miles’ Remedies.”
Dr. Miles’ Remedies]
are sold by all drug-!
gists under a positive
guarantee, first bottle
benefits or money re
funded. Book on dis
eases of the heart and]
nerves free. Address,
DR. MILES MEDICAL CO., Elkhart, Ind.
There is a lot of trutii in the
following paragraphs from the
Blakely Observer: “Anewspaper
man may rip, roar and rant
through his columns for a man or
set of men for years: then he is a
tolerably good fellow'. But let him
be derelict in his duty toward this
man or set of men one time and
past favors are forgotton and the
newspaper man is accused of tra
ding—in other words is a cheat
and swindler.”—Griffin Call.
Speaking of the recent election
of a Jew, Mr. Simon, from Oregon
to the United States senate it has
been forgotton perhaps that a
number of Jews have been elected
to that august body. Louisiana
has furnished three Jews to the
United States senate, Judah P.
Benjamin, Mr. Motes and B. F.
Jonas. David Yulee of Fiorida, who
served in the senate before the
war was also a Jew.—Thomasville
Times-Enterprise.
A NEW TRIUMPH.
The Dreaded Consumption Can
Be Cured.
T. A. Slocum, the Great Chemist and
Scientist, will Send to Sufferers
Three Free Bottles of His Newly
Discovered Remedies to
Lure Lonsumption and
all Lung Troubles.
The Bloody Meadow.'
Tewkesbury, where a famous battle
was fought during the war of the
roses, is in Gloucestershire, at the con
fluence of the Avon and the Severn and
180 miles from London. The battle was
fought on the Bloody meadow, just out
did© the modern town, and, according
to local tradition, one night in every
year on the anniversary of the conflict
the adherents of the white and red roset;
meet and fight the battle over again.
Nothing could he fairer, more philan
thropic or carry more joy to the afflict
ed than the generous offer of the hon
ored and distinguished chemist, T. A.
Slocum, M. C., of New York City.
He has discovered a reliable and
absolute cure for consumption' and all
bronchial, throat, lung and chest dis
eases, catarrhal affections, general
decline and weakness, Joss of flesh and
all conditions of wasting away: and to
make its great merits known, we w r ill
send three free bottles of his newly
discovered remedies to any afflicted
reader of The Georgia Cracker.
Alread.y his ‘“new scientific system of
medicine” has permanently cured
thousands of apparently hopeless cases.
The Doctor considers it not only his
professional, but his religious duty—a
duty which he ow es to suffering human
ity—to donate his infalible cure.
He has proved the “dreaded con
sumption” to be a curable disease be
yond a doubt, m any climate, and has
on file in his American and European
laboratories thousands of “heartfelt
testimonials of gratitude” from those
benefited.
Catarrhal and pulmonary troubles
lead to consumption, and consumption
uninterrupted, means speedy and cer
tain death. Don't delay until it is
late. Simply write T. A. Slocum, t.
C.. OS Pine street, New York, giving^-
press and post-office address, and
free medicine will be promptly sept.
Please tell the Doc»or*you saw his ofPfcc
in The Georgia Cracker.