Newspaper Page Text
VOL. XXVI. NO 49
INUKfISOLL TALKS SENSE.
And do you know wlmt is 11n?
jnatter with tl n country today?
MV wu! t mom business. Talk
about chani’.y! Jiti-ir.e-- is tlx'’
liu"-t chtiiily ever conceived of
Jfc.sinV>s that feeds the hungry, i
ITai el it lies the naked; business .
Riat wipes the tears from the
widow's* eye.* and orphans’ j
checks: business that puts dim-I
ties iff joy in the cheeks of sor- !
Jlw; business that fills the!
\yrltl with art and song, with!
«nmcr<v', the land with happy
jfflif Wind and water are
ourkrvants; let them work.
I/igting and steam are our
shtvj let them toil. Starttho
sue l l let labor v ith its count
less:. # - have work, and where
rtlieii irk thero is no want.
IT KK:d‘WOItK, MY BOY.
S< you can’t do it. You
canbtill through this world
witlit work, unless your way
is q very short. Men have
tried before you. Tlu-y have
loafnroiind the street corners,
Bund cigars, told windy sto
ries,lank whisky and all that,
but |y hav > never succeeded.
Youte probably no smarter
tbaiiher boys. You had bet
ter Uu a trade of some kind
raththan become a chronic
loafejprodueing nothing what
%yprlr yourself, nothing to
help the world along. This
worljius little use tor beys
who V' unwilling to pull •• It
theirfials and tarn their way
to fan ami fortune.
Thecod things of this world
al re n handed around to idlers
onSi.vir platters.
GREW/fOME GAMBLING.
When Tommy Atkins was in
tne Sudan, he amused himself
during the hct season with ay
original game of chance called
“taking the temperature.”
t/ As nenrlv .-veryb --.y had a
flight touch f fi-y-r, m mmit ‘
therm meter would • e borrowed
from a surgeon and the temper
ature of t-ach oiiv taken.
Each man would put up u
small stake,and the one having
the -highest. temperature would
ts I* t: l pool
"^TtVwinner would sometimes
no d a tempeiatunl as Irigh as
us 102 F.|‘ which speaks Cor it
nelf.
It is a good illustration of the
rsckl-ssiiess possessed by the
averag British soldii-r and the
philosophical way in which he
takes his troubles. —Strand Mag
azine.
THE DIGESTION OF STA
BLE EDIBLES.
RnUi.d rice will digest in one
hour boiled in milk, however,
it recfies two hours, if eaten
withinhoild milk two hours
anti ievn min'd '*•
Rajegg will digest in about
one Itirand a hair fritd. three
hourtnd a half; soft-boiled,
! r -.jours, hard-boiled, three
b maud u half. The white
and How should bo served to
getl-tas on • assists in the di
gi s’ i( of Ihe ot 1 er,
'*Sa[beef requires four hours
and ft i-< ii minutes .
It-(steak, broiled, time
hour:
Sited Viters, throe hours
and tialf. Oysters require a
1 n?ij time to digest than broil
ed nit.
Ibit v<:il requires live hours
for |fle.t digestion. Fork the
■uiiiq
S it i udding is supposed to
take hours at.d a half.—
Mrs.j. T. Borer in February
Ladij’ H- one Jqurnel.
A NECESSITY.
In, o any community, ai d
,i |1 find that the most sue
upon are those who pat
uewspap*rs and road
le.s« days tho newspaper j
jucatar. Tt xt books and j
ho iks ciiiinot take its
A man cannot bo at his
i it | rofessionul man, iner
chutjfurmor or mechanic un*
Jess t x a4# th« newspapers
and i'ps up with the progress
of 1 1" >r'<.l •
I jin;;- .1 etrerson said that |
be will rather live in a conn-,
try jth newspapers, and with
out] t" i (inn nt than in a
co .ry i ! v* t‘ • en» 'ud
w itll' nett -p pel's
TJ ' out- is .i liece-si- [
tv, tom r, luxury, un ad-
and s fri-u.t. The man |
- tod - without it will
4-_a\Hs h handicapped and otli-j
iii | * ut 111 t i see and j
wil m sat o s.
1’ Lavina t»eeit stated lately
I|l 11 lie L'.igbst pmi era Unit j
Q,u>.i i Vic, ilia nos ho-n a total
abstainer tor solera! year*,
isnin U , |y ll IS deemed tt worth
inv sti ta'o the impor*
t int me't-r and now this an
liotiuc-m ill i' made; “Her
J 1 tj )S tv drit k - little w me, l ut
at t o’clo k lunch —which |r. al
jv constitutes her dinner —her
l)>jvri ugn is a ulus, of weak
Hj,,t 'h whisky and mineral tin-
P|. At dinner bur Majesty dots
] l more that merely touch
, ' f »
Jur it me.
The Gwinnett Herald.
FOR MATHEMATICIANS.
! HOME qt'RKK FliltmiNll KOI! AMI’SK
MI,NT ANI) t NsTßl'i I Ton.
Philadelphia Times.
In what month and on what
iday of the month weft'.you
.born ?
Write down the • "tnber of
;t he month and to t . right of
it the number of the n Mill
j t iply hy 2, add s,.mt.liiply by
60, add your age, subtract 8(56
and then add 110. The result
will he the number of the month
and the day of your birth as
well as your age. Thus:
Suppose you were 10 on March
7. March is the third month,
so you write down 55 and to the
right of it 7. Now multiply by
2, add 6, multiply bv 60. add
your age, 1(1; fcubstraet 6(50, add
116, and you have 8,710 —that
is, you were born in .the t hird
month on the seventh day, and
your age is 10 Try the process
with any person Vs age, and you
will get a similar result.
If you take in y number con
sisting of throe consecutive
digits, like 264, and permute
them, making six numbers,
then add these up,.divide by 0
(1 tell me the quotient, I will
tell you the number thought of.
In this case the quotient al
ways cousists of three equal
numbers. The number thought
of will consist of one of these
equal numbers and of the next
lower and the next higher num
ber. Thus:
< 264
246
624
642
426
462
1,998
Dividing 1,998 by 0, we. get
J 666, so that 6is the middle
digit of the number thought of.
Here is a queer bit of reason
ing. What is wrong about it ?
j 4 minus 4 equals 2 minus 2,
since each is zero. Divide each
| side of the equation by 2 minus
2. and we find that 2 equals t.
Mathematically, 4 —T—2 —2.
4—l 2—2
!fence = , that is 2 1
2—2 2—2
We have" spoken of perniut-
I ing. The subject of permuta-
an interesting one. In
how iminy wavs do you suppose,
\ for example, it is possible for
the 12 clubs of the National
Basoball league to wind up at
tho close of the season? Let
us set*.
Call the clubs by the letters
A, B, C, I), etc. 'The first •let
ter, A, can, of course, have but
one arrangement; but, taking
in B, we find that we now have
two arrangements possible, All
and BA—that is, twice as many
as one letter. Now bring in the
third letter, C. With AB we
civil arrange C ill three way
CAB, ACB and ABC—and with
BA we can arrange C in three
more ways, making <> wavs in
all—that is. 11 letters may be
arranged in three times as many
wiiys as 2 letters. Similarly
we shall find that 4 letters may
be arranged in 4 times as many
ways as 15 letters.
By proceeding in this way,
we find that the 12 clubs may
be urrungt d in us many ways as
1 times 2 times 8 times 4, and
so ou up to and including the
whole number of clubs. If you
will multiply the first, 12 num
bers together, you will find that
tli * product is 479,00! ,000,
which number represents tin*
number of possibilities of tin*
case. If it were undertaken to
print all the possible guesses at
the relative standing of the
dubs at the conclusion of the
season therefore, and we allow
two square inches for each
guess, the paper required would
cover 152 acres of ground.
Tho sensitive plant seems al
most to possess intelligence.
When touched or even approach
ed, it- leaves shrink away, a
i hough in fear.
The philosopher of the Atchi
-3(i.. Ul ,b ns .- to ii mark thal
marriage seems to have on •
good effect upon women: it
cures them < r keeping a diary,
and starts good many of them
to keepi g dai y.
All C l ift old hook dealer
hough oil'lo from a tramp,
who said >iu found it ‘‘on the
road” between Cortland, On*.,
and Omaha. The Bible was
printed in Psoi> and has maim
scrip notes made in Plymouth,
Miss., in 11159. The bookseller
lias refused <176 for the volume.
LAWRENCEVILLE, GEORGIA, TUESDAY, FEBRUARY I 6th 1897.
! ’l’ll K NEWEST FI UK ESCAPE
a enAOTioAi, sum-: koi: i.ikk.
A tiro-eseapi that, has just
been perfected and is being
erected on school and other pub
lic buildings, is so arranged
that children lind it a pleasure
to forsake studies for fire-es
cape drill. Instead of compell- j
ing a tenant in a burning build- j
ing to climb down a steep'and i
slippery iron ladder, the new j
lpe-e,scape provides a way to j
the street by means of a gentle!
slide, which a child can accom
plish without any danger.
The fire-escape is shaped like
a cylinder, is (1 feet in diameter
ane is made of smooth sheet
steel. In the cento# of the es
cape is a chute, which winds
round and round a pipe that is
intended to carry the water for
the fire hose. The chute is so
arranged tlidt it is Impossible!
to slide down at a dangerously
fast [nice.
When a fire breaks out in a
building to which one of these
(ire-escapes is attached all the
occupant has to do is to open
the window nearest to his rooms,
place his wile and family in the
chute, down which they will
tfently descend to the ground,
and then follow by the -.atne
comfortable route. It is as
pleasant as a toboggan slide,
and to children it is a fascinat
ing pastime.
The new escape was given a
trial at a school building at
Oswego, X. Y.. recently. The
children were busily at work
with their books when the
alarm sounded, but they made
fur the fire-escape landing in
the usual orderly manner. One
by one at the word of command
they clilulled into the chute and
j descended to the ground in safe
ty, They went down at the
rate of lot> a minute without
i confusion, and in a little over
four minutes 6<X> pupils had
reached the sid.-v. ilk.
Besides the chute the new
fire-escape is supplied with
plugs to the water pipe in the
center, so tlyit hose can lie at
tacheil at any of the landings.
This practically makes it a fire
escape and water tower com
bined. A fireman’s ladder has
been placed on the outside of
the escape which reaches to flu
tup of the-building, and an end
less rope for twisting the hose
to the top of the building has
also been added. The time
saved by this contrivance which
dors away with the necessity
for ladders, will be of great
value when a fire is being at
treked.
The fire-escape is especially
adapted for use in hospitals!
where sick and maimed patients 1
could not be carried down an
iron ladder without great dif
ficulty and danger. Tho de
scent of the chute.is so easy
that no harm can come to a sick *
person, provided care is taken I
to properly place the invalid in j
the chute ready for the descent, j
The shape of the chute renders j
it as sate when used in counec- j
nectibu with a skyscraper as
when attached to a low build
ing, and the slide for life is as
easy and pleasant as walking
downstairs.
As is well known, one of the
greatest dangers when a tiro
breaks out in a crowded build
ing is the likelihood of a panic.
Stairways are often rendoied
impassable in this *iav. Thro’
hurry one or more of those seek
irg to escape will fall, and those
behind will crowd over them,
trampling them underfoot and
often packing the stairway sol
idly with human bodies. With
the chute sueli a condition is
impossible. Th<* person who
falls into it will slide to the
bottom as sately as -lie who
starts carefully, and it cannot
be choked except at the bottom
and with a door of sufficient
nize there that danger is obvia
ted —X. V, World.
WIDOWS OF RKVOLI TION
AKY SOLDIERS.
“Seven women are still draw
ing pension# as the widows of
men who saw aetiv service in
the war of the Revolution;
women whose husband# served
Washi gum mo*-, than a hun
dred and twenty years ago,”
w rites .Howard in the February
Ladies’ Home Journal. “The
eldest of these -urviving widows
of tlx* Revolution is living at
L’*s Angeles, California. .She
ii Mrs. Lovey Aldrich, now in
the ninety-i ighth year of her
age. Her husband was Private
Caleb Aldrich, who was horn in
! the year 111(18, and served us a
soldier boy in the New England
j campaigns of 1 hr? war. Mr.-
Nancy Jones, of Jonesborougl
Tennessee, whose husband wa
Darling Jones, a private m on
ul the North Carolina regi
menls. is the youngest of tin-
Revolutionary widows, beim
i now about eighty-three years o
!»g"
“The other five Nancy Cloud,
w ho is living at Churn, Virginia
and is the widow of Sergean
William Cloud, of Captain
Christian’s Virginia line; Estliei
S. Damon, of Plymouth I nion
Vermont, whose husband was
Private Noah Damon, of Massa
chusetts ; Mary Snead, living
at Parkslev, Virginia, widow of
Private Bowdoin Snead; Nancy
A. Weatherman, who lives at
Elk Mills, Tennessee, and whose
first husband was Robert Glas
cock, a'fifer in one of the Air
giniafregiinents, and Rebecca
Mayo, living at Newborn , Vir
ginia, w idow of Stephen Mayo
a soldier from Viginia. That
these women can be tile widows
of Revolutionary solde-rs i,-
roadily understood in view o!
the faet that their husbands
were well on in years when they
; married. As, for example,
j when Est her Sumner married
Noah Damon in the year 1866
—fifty-two years after the close
of the war—she was but twenty
one, while he was seventy-six.
“The last Revolutionary
widow pensioner who had mar
ried prior to the close of tin
close of the war, and had there
i fore,actually lived during Revo
lutionary times, was Nancy Se
rena, widow of Daoiel F. Bakt
mati., She died about, twenty-
seven years ago, only a year m
two after her husband, who wa
the last of the ReVolut ii na \
soldiers on the pension roll.”
THE OFFICE OF CII.KF
JUSTICE.
The office of chief just.ieo o
the supreme court of the I'niti i
States'was established by tin
constitution concurrently with
office of president; but ivhih
the presidency has been open t<
all native-born citizens above
the age 66, the ofi’eo of ebie
justice of of the supreme court,
bestowed usually upon men of
mature if not advanced year.-,
has been ln-ld in fact by seven
persons only since the founds
♦ ion of the government. Tlier
have been more than threi
times as many presidents.
John Jay, of Now York. w,-s
the first chief justice of the su
preme court He was appoint
ed by Washington in 1789
Judge Jay at that time was
only 44 years of age. When lie
attained the age of 60 he re
signed and retiled to privet
life. He died 84 years later—
in 1829.
The second of the supreme
court chief justices was Join
Ellsworth, of Connecticut!.
IHe was 64 years of age yrhet
-appointed and served until
: 1801, when he resigned, resign *
j lions from public office being
somewhat more frequent then
| than now.
His successor was John Mar
shall, of Virginia, who was It -
! years of age when he assumed
this post by appointment nt
President John Adams; In* led
it uninterruptedly for thirty
four years, until his death in
1885.
Andrew appointed as his sue
censor, Roger B. Taney, o'
Maryland, who held tbs office’
until his death in 1804. Judge
Taney was 59 years of age when
appointed and 87 at the tim
of his death. No chief justice
of the supreme court, perhap
had more intricate questions i*i
determine or to vote upon in
that tribunal than did Judg*
Taney, and his tenure and thal
of Chief Justice Marshall stretch
over nearly one-half of the hi--
tory of the Cnited Stut-es as n
nation.
Chief Justice Ta iy\ tuicce--
sor was Salmou P. Guano, ol
Ohio, who had previously been
secretary of the treasury, and
was 50 year# of uge when ap
pointed. He served for nin
years, dying in 1878. M
Cha si* win appointed by A bra
ham Lincoln, and it is a parti I
the political history their day
that Mr. Chase was a candidate
fertile Democratic nomination
the presidency, though lie Mind
been one of tie* founders of (lie
Republican party.
Chief Justice Chase was suc
ceeded in 1878 by President
i i rant’s appointment of another
j Ohio man, Morrison R. Waite,
| who was 67 years of age w hen
| appointed, and served until
1888, w hen he was succeeded hy
tin-present Chief Justice Mel
ville \\. Fuller, npjjhintcd by
President Cleveland Mr Ful
ler is a native of Maine. He
was, when appointed, 66 years
of age, and was 04 on Feb. 11.
lie is thy seventh of the chief
justices of'the supreme court
and has served t Inis far a briefer
term than any of bis predeces-l
sors since Chief Justice Ells-1
worth.
♦
In addition to the eliief jile- j
t iees who have served, several!
men who have been nominated
for the office, but rejected by
the senate, which has confirma
tory power. The office of chief
just ice is by many citizens more
highly coveted 'haif that of the
presidency. The labor is less, |
11he responsibility much smal
ler, tin tenure'onger and the
honor an exalted one.
FARM HANDS NEEDED.
An American who hail lived
in Mexico for twenty years
eame lack to this country a
few months ago and visited the
places and people .that were
once familiar to him. His opin
ion of his native land, as re
ported by tin- Mexican corres
pondent of The Boston Herald
is by no means flattering, says
t ln- Yoatli’sYotnpniii- ii. There
are “nice people” here yet, but
lie thinks that the prevailing
tendencies in Am rican life
favor extriivagHin <-, prenten
sion, 1" v and worry; and!
along „ . the overdriven man i
\e have the lazy man also.
‘Just to text this In bo? ques
tion.” the visitor told tfio cor
respondent, “1 went to planta
tion- in Virginia and to farms
hi < >hio, dressed in my old dials
and asked for work. There was
plenty i ,e it. The planters and
farmois were all w illing to give
me $lO month and good hoard
and a clean lied all the year
round. I reckoned it tip that I
could savo SIOO a year at that
rate and get fat, too. I have
worked hard in mv time in
rough employments and have
no fe - r of sweating.
“W ell, then, 1 met some
voting Hows in Washington,
loafing -out the barrooms and
in f. in • of the hotels, talking
i ulwni ! rd times.
“ . i ffl 1 said, “there is no
need < t loafing and grumbling.
I ll teP yotj where yon can get
work. 1 over to Alexandria
and there i.Mr, So-and So wants
a man; another wants three,
mid still another two. Wages
|l(t a month, bread, butter and
meat, and peaches and cream
in the season
“ ‘You can read Sundays and
learn something, and coine out
with money in your pocket at
the end of the year. Why leaf
|on your friends and talk poli
tics? Better work.’
“My reception by tln seyoung
iiu*n was not aiit husiastic. Home
said they had never worked at
hard manualJabor; others de
spised farm-' , it was so dull
in “ ; v. All sorts of
excti r* given, but not one
prompt good sense anil a
willingness to do lione t, bard
work.
“Now, that's a fine lot of
jyoung men for you! You call
11hem, 1 suppose, the hope ot
America, and all that
The fact js our cities are
crowded with men w that there
is a surplus in every depart meat
jof labor. Tie-country has been
j emptied of the brawn and mu,-
:cle that should b ,:v**n to ug
riculture. On a farm a man
can nt least raise food enough
tq avoid starvation, and if In* is
not abb* to purchase land and
i cannot find occupation in our
cities, there are farmers in near
. 1 v all parts of the country who
will be glad to employ him.
It has been calculated that
mi Great Britain tin* output of
books is as follows: Sermons,
.me volume a day.' novels, live
a day; educational books, two a
day; art and science, two of
|each every week; histories and
biographies, six a week, and
law, one every two wicks.
The science of biology dates
from Trevirauus’ work on the
subject in 1802. He dealt, ac
cording to the know ledge ol his
I time, with the science of lift*.
In 12 days a letter from Ca
di/. will be delivered in New
' York.
SNEERING AT A ME
CHANIC.
__________ *
‘Loys, says an exchange,
“do not sneer at, the hardwork
ing mechanic, for beneath that
dust soiled jacket may rest the
spirit of true nobility.’’
. The exchange is eminently
correct. It is indeed wrong to
pass through this world sneer
ing at mechanics A good.’ av
erage, able-bodied mechanic is a
bad man to sneer at. At al
most any unexpected moment
he is quite liable to transfer
some of the dust of his jacket
to the broadcloth coat of the
sheerer and jolt him severly if
he sneers to hard at the me
chanic. If a boy or young man
is contemplating sneering at a
mechanic, it would he quite as
well not to'let a hard-working
mechanic catch him at it. When
the liov wants to siw-i-r real hard
an if feels that he can’t hold it
any longer, it would be far b«-t
--ter, instead of plunging right
into t tie midst of a lot of Hard
working mechanics to seek some
seluded locality and have the
si.eer out all by himseff. It
would look a great deal better,
and the boy would look better
when he went back to the bosom
(
of his family.
No. boys, it is neither polite,
genteel nor wise to sneer at a
met hiinie Neither is it healthy.
Thi• sneerer, is too often found
in a pensive mood, abstractedly
engaged in applying pieces of
raw beefsteak to his eye. trying
to reduce a swollen nose with a
gi-iierniis decoction of arnica,
feeling his lame back or pick
ing the gold filling out of lib
teeth, which he happeiid to cas
ually cough up soon after in
dulging in his playful littic
sneer at the hard working me
chanic'. This is a practical les
son in psrrlor etiquette which
•the’youth will not I* liable to
forget in a month or six weeks.
—Texas Siftings.
great girl.
“Greatest girl at our board
ing house you every saw,” de
clared (Juirkly, with a giggle.
“Never says what you expect
her to say, and you’d be disap
pointed if she did, after hearing
her.
‘•Dry goods clSrk sitaopposite
her, and asked the ether day if
she really thought there were
bargains in the matriirionial
lottery. ‘Of course there are,’
she answered with a laugh. ‘1
myself have been maiked down
from !18 to 20. ’
“Old bachelor that sits next
toiler at the- table spilled liis
ice cream in her lap. She nev
er screamed nor ran away, but
effusively took him by the hand
and congratulated him on the
coolness of the entire proceed
ing.
“Dude boarder had the nerve
to propose to her, ami she took
half an hour explaining to him
how it was a'.l she could possi
bly do to support her’ mother
ami herself. When she thought
of taking on any more obliga
tions, she would certainly have
another talk with him. The
chump went around telling it,
proud as a turkey gobbler.
“Ileal estate fiend wanted to
sell her a lot for twice what it
; was worth. Sho closed the deal
j by offering to take half his com
mission and give him a quit
claim to tlie lot. lie still
scratches his head and looks at
her from the corners of his eyes.
“Think of laying my own for
tune at her feet. Haven’t the
slightest idea that she will ac
cept. and for that very reason
am inclined to think that sin
will. ” —Detroit Free I’ress.
in most states of the t’nion a
bushel of wheal equals sixty
pounds.
In the pupa state, the lies
siuu lly can sea rely be distin
gnislioii from a Itxseod.
Conductors on smoking cars
should at least help the ladies
to alight.—Philadelphia Roe
old.
Sarah Thomas, a.lively wo
man lini years old, in Wales,
possesses all her faculties, but
is a dangerous somnambulist
The Princess of Wales annually
sends her on her birthday a*
many shillings as she has lived
years.
'l'lie late A. T. Stewart, speak
ing figuratively rather than lit
eral iy 4 once sad, “If you have
two bushels of potatoes to sell,
•l>eiid the price of one bushel in
advertising the price of the
other.” .
1.00 PER ANNUM, IN ADVANCE
Highest of all in Leavening Power.—Latest U.S. Gov’t Report
RoYaI Baking
lv*'SS Powder
PURE
| Ol'R LITERARY STATES
MEN.
.Southern lawyers, as « rule.
| are lovers of good literature
Sargent S Pn-ntis* stored his
retentive memory with thou
sands of the brightest gems in
song and story.
Our own Chief Just ice Lump
kin was a great reader, and his
decisions arc noted for their lit
erary flavor.
He road the best fiction and
poetry, and this accounts for
liis graceful style, his re-It vo
cabulary and his wealth of.» il
j lustrat ion*.
Robert Toombs was a cion
reader of the leading reviews.
He found in their pages the
cream of thp literature of the
| period, and thus got in touch
with it. Tile reviews were bet
ter periodicals in his day than
i they are now.
Alexander H. Stephens was
ready at any time to drop law
, and polities for a literary dis-'
j mission.
Beiijiinin 11. Hill cured noth
ing for fiction, but In- loved
Milton, and quoted liberally
from him in his speeches and
writings.
Judge John Erskiis- and
Judge. Richard 11. Clark were
very fond of good novels and
poetry„ami they wrote much
that piisse> ed superior literary
merit.
A contemporary of these great
lawyers, Judge Jeremiah Black,
of IVniisvlvaiiia, had a more
•pointed poli-fied style than any
man at the bar in bis genera
tion.
Black explained his literary
superiority in this way. Jlis
parents*were (Junker#, and they
limited him to a£few religious
bookstand text -books, t hie day
lie found in the garrett u copy
of jßhnkespenre.
The liov read the book
through. Then hej|£iead it
agtyiii Night after night he
perused it *in secret.
For years he studied and
memorized Shakespeare “until
his mind was saturated with
the genius of the iinmoitnl
bard.
At the age of sixteen he wrote
I a liook which wu*complimented
hy eminent scholars for its ad
; mirable style.
The. early’and constant study
of that’one book in his,boyhood
made Black the best writer at
the Pennsylvania bar.
A PATHETIC AD. .
Here is an advertisement
which should bring trade, says
the Boot and Shoe Recorder,
even though people had to use
a grindstone to wear holes
through their shoes:
I am the father of 2fi chil
dren. No tw ins. lam also a
cobbler anti need work.-
If I have served my country
well, it is evidence that 1 will
mend your shoes well. One
good turn deserves another*
My shop is in the rear of Cald
well and Lanier’s.. Let me half
sole those. J. M. Linnky.
RAM’S HORN BLASTS.
To dose our hearts against a
brother is to shut heaven
against ourselves.
No trial can come to the
Christian that may not tell him
more of God.
The only giving that is real
giving is giving that is done ac
cording to ability.
Showing our best side to
others will cause them to show
their best side to tis.
A poor man wii li a sunny
spirit will get more out of life
I ban a wealthy grumbler.
You can sometimes te]) how
well a man knows Christ by tin
wr v he treats ills horse.
f,ove is dead when the bin
band begins to grudge the
money it lakes to support his
wife.
t It is not wlmt wo have, but
what we do with wlmt we have,
that proves our fitness for pro
mot ion.
Tlu-re is something wrong
with our soul’s health, if we
have no appetitn for any kind
of Christian work.
In everything, from praying
in public to getting a tooth
pulled, self wants to obtain a
lilt In dist inction -for itself.
No station gives immunity
from heartaches and disappoint
ments to the man who is not
putting lus trust in God.
Wlmt sick man wouiu send
for a doctor who had gone no
deopej- into medical books than
some preachers have into the
Hilda?
m Moiiors.
1 ourisf—Are we near the
tails ?
Guide—Yes, sir. As as
tlie ladies stop talking von can
hetfr the roar.
Friend—ls your picture in the
academy a su’cess ?
Artist — I’hat's what I'm won
dering, Some one said it was
worth the prie^ofadmission.
ll(—denes is all right, I sup
pose, but he anti I do not like
each other a bit.
She—Well, that is much to
the credit of both of you.-
Amateur Humorist—That’s a
pretty good joke of mine, don’t
you think so?
Experienced Editor—Well, it
is just as funny now as it ever
was.
Robert—When I get into my
new house I mean that every
thing shall go like clockwork.
Richard— I see; the same as
heretofore; tick, tick.
The English language must lie
tough,
At least that’s what I’ve reck
oned.
For it is still alive today
Though murdered every sec
ond.
Inquisitive Lady—Why do
yon hate soap so ?
Dismal Dawson—l don’t. I
simply ignore it. We don’t
move in the same set; that s
all.
Miss Itanknumber—Youdou’t
mean to sav you became engaged
to him after but livb hours’ ac
quaintance ?
M iss l p-to-Dnti—Certain Iv.
I Imv much time would you have
me devote to one engagement?
Hobby—ls oxygen what the
'xen breath all day ?
I’upn—Of course, and what
everything else breathes.
Hobby—And is nitrogen what
every one breathes at night ?
Wife—Those Eskimos up in
Alaska have good, sound com
mon sense.
Husband: —How so ?
W ife—Why, when they fall
in love with a girl they un- *
nomine it by sending her a seal
skin sttiypio.
Sister—There,you have candy
all over your new suit! What
will mamma say ?
Little brother —Well,mamma
won’t let me have any fun in
these clothes till I get ’em
spoiled.
This world is but a fleeting
show,
And U w are they, alas!
Who can rake up a pull that’s
strong
Enough for a free pass.
‘ls Wheelhed a man of his
j word?’
‘l fear not. He saya he has
a bicycle lamp that never goes’
out ’ —New York evening Jour
nal.
Smith—So you wero married
on election day, were you? You
didn’t, vote, then.
Brown—No, 1 was paired
Somerville Journal.
‘Well, now that you are hack,
i you can tell us how much it
I costs to go to Europe.’
'AH you’ve got and ull you
i can borjow over there. ’ —Judge.
‘What is a ‘coign of vantage, ’
papal’
‘Something American girls
use in catching foreign hus
bands, my son.’—Cincinnati
Commercial Tribune.
Maud—Why’did .Mabel give
uj> Clarence Sprocket?
Maydie—Oh, In* got a new
wheel and she objected to the
make.—New York Commercial
Advertiser.
Hi own—l wonder who origi-
Haled the idea (fiat It is on
-1 lucky to begin anything on Fri
; day V
Robinson—Probably it was
some lazy individual who pre
i ri el to wait until Saturday.
Lawyer—Wlmt 1 want is to
prove that my client is montal
| ly deficient
Expert—Certainly. There
i won’t be the least trouble in
showing tlmt. so long as In- lias
mployed you us his luwyer.
Prof, (!e during)—Oxygen,
-gentlemen, is essential to ail
I animal existence; there could
!be no life without it. Strange
j to say, it wits not discovered
| until a century ago when—
Student—What did they do
j before- it was disoveied, pro
fessor ?
Adolphus—l ’ve half a mind —
Kate—There, Deity, don’t ex
aggerat".—lJnston Transciii t.
Hewn* Tubules: at lirgggista
Riyaus Tubules cure Hut uleucs.