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THE QEOI^QILAJi’S MAGAZINE PAGE Daysey Mayme and Her Folks THE JOY OF BEING ADAM, By FRANCES L. GARSIDE. IT is a wonder that the scientists, and those alarmists who pose as such, have never noted the perni cious effects of gasoline This commonly used article has a most deleterious effort on human, be- i ings. When taken in whiffs from their own automobiles it speedily reduces I their mental ability to that of a mum my. It impairs the memory! After a man or woman has taken these whiffs from his or her own car for as long as six weeks, not a vestige of memory , remains To illustrate When the Appletons owned a buggy with a fist wheel to which they drove a spavined horse, and asked a friend to go riding three weeks from next Mon.da-. the' appeared with the buggy with the flat wheel and the spavined horse promptly on time. Now that they own an automobile, if they ask a friend tn go riding tomor row, they’ have forgotten ere the sun sets today that such an engagement ; was ever made Daysey Mayme Appleton. who takes 1 everything in its most aggravated , form, from measles to love, finds her memory so badly impaired that she for gets not only her friends, but her own father. “I am not sorry," he said, when the cae had left without him. "The inci dent serves as further proof of the Joy es Being Adam There wore no auto mobiles in his days. "Adam." he continued, “missed many of the torments of today. How many men are told every meht bv their com plaining wives, ’I wish you could be in my shoes for just one day!’ Adam never heard it. for the reason that Eve didn't wear any. The Good Old Days. "When Adam gav'e his- wife a present there were no kin or neighbors to suspect it was a peace offering. "He never came homo from work so tired that he could trip on a pin. to be met with the demand from his wife that he dress up and take her into society. "He did not break his finger nails hooking her dress up the back, like the hookworm the man of today has be come. and he did not have big dress making bills for his wife, while his own clothes were fit for nothing on earth hut to go blackberry Ing In "Neither did ho ever wear such neg lected looking clothes that he looked like a bonk the baby has played with "He never had reason In the spring to estimate that he had eaten fifteen yards of bacon and a carload of fried potatoes in the winter past, his wife having too little time left from socie ty’s demands to cook anything else. "There were no parlors in his days, consequently no parlor lounge, and con sequently no cushions on which ho tried to rest his weary head only to bo re minded that they are fpr show, not for use. “He did not starve to death trying to be a satisfactory host at a dinner ta ble; neither did he rattle down to posthumous fame as ‘Eve s husband.’ “His wife made no Jealous inquiries Into his past. There being no hats those days, he was spared the question that always greets the modern hus band -when he picks up his bat. And that question is, ’Where are you go ing'” "His clothes took up no room in the closet, and ho became a model husband in one shining particular without ef fort. No Wifie in Curl Papers. “Ho never tu Eve with hairpins In her mouth! And his love "as spared the disillusion of i "If., in curl papers. "His wife never complained that she had to ’pick up’ after him. And he never had col l chills caused by being compelled to give Eve his hard-earned money." knowing she would carry it carelessly ip. a pocketbook, and leave it on the fi st counter she reached. “Eve never attended meetings called to discuss ’The Seifishne- s> of the Men.’ and her manner of coming into this world effectually barred her from the privilege of boasting about her kin." Lysandei John stopped and sighed Necessarilv there was much in The Joy of Bring A'i ;m 11 it proved The Sorrow of Being Eysander John. With the thought of the automobile In mind, end the cost of running it. and the growing extravagant of "om en of today, - op, hided; “And Eve never "as a woman who thougnt it r-ght to use the family nest egg for making a < .ike." Nadine Face Powder (In Green Boxes Only ) Makes the Complexion Beautiful ©Soft and Velvety It is Pure, Harmless Money Back if Xol Entirely I'leasca The soft, velvety appearance re mains until pow der is washed off. Purified by a new process. Prevents sunburn and return of' discolorations. The increasing popularity is wonderful. White, Flesh, Pink, Brunette By toilet counters or mail Price 50 cents. NATIONAL TOILET COMPANY. Paris. Ttnn. ■■■Fl. 11 I -.J—iaJJ-ll—‘■■-J 1 ” 1 I ■■!!J!!.* 1 . . From the factory direct to you. This means, quality considered, best Piano val ues for the least money. CABLE PIANO CO., 84 North Broad-st. o< Love’s Labor Lost Copyright, 1912. National >'*wa Association. By Nell Brinkley < ! . L .A' r /z JWRjr-- . liwi. —”” jHfiEfer’.A -x" .jaEHSK-.i- I g" i .. ■ .OpL SOI fa ' ■' ' ilifc 'wl ™-/ -.-■ ilw A tl i ■--<? visL 1-4. - JKA r iSßfcsg 4 HPT } 4xl:4 ;y Even Cunid Can Be Fooled bv a Maid with a Heart of Stone. The Manicure Lady By WILLIAM F. KIRK. I WAVE just came back from a j I trip to the county." said the Manicure Lady. "Goodness j knows. George. I hated tn leave it. j Them country people always makes you I ; feel so at home. There ain't any taxi cabs there, or any sykscrapers, or any , j mashers at the corner, but the home . I i poking is excellent, and you can get I all the pure country air you want. I And think of all them little flashes In j the little brooks, and the flora fauna ■ : in the trees, George." "I'll bet you don't know what flora fauna is. kid Tin," said the skeptical Head Barber "It is some kind of treetoad. George." replied the Manicure Lady "They are | the funniest little things you ever | seen. The landlord's son found one for imo and brother Wilfred. It was green. so they couldn't see it among the leaves if thev wanted to shoot it. Th. landlord's son wa- never in the city. George, and ain't smart like us folks, but he was awful kind. He showed me and Wilfred all over the place, tine of I the things he showed us was a cunning little wild animal called a wampus. He , I said that it always lived on a side hill 1 on account of the fact. George, that its ■ '"<> tight legs was sm- ■ than its tuo left legs. And he explained that] t was all the time on the right of the I ■id!, and that it alway s had to walk | straight ahead. He said it couldn’t j : turn around, so it kept walking." Hid he tell you all that ?" inquired! | the grinning Head Barber, "Certainly he did, George, and I don't nothing for you to be grin- : ning about, either. If one of them I simple country lads wants to be nice ;to city folks that has had more chances 'han him. and more education, I don’t think it is none of your business! m make fun of him. 'Anothi i thing he showed n ano; Wilfred was i mineral spring. He said I that in the winter the water in it ; : tasted like hot whisky, and that in ■ spring it turned to sulphur ami I > base < Ain't it grand, the ways that i Nature has of taking care ■( them in-I no--ent pcopl, up there- You see. I ; George, they' don't get a chance to see many papers, so they cant read health! I hints and beauty hints like we can. i Nature has springs for them just like ' the one of which I w as just telling you i of. What in the world are you grin : ning about ? Anybody w ou'd think you | w as as simple as the little fellow that i showed us around up there ' t I don t blame him for grinning." de clared the Head Barber. "He was f ringing you " ' You re dippy!" exclaimed the Mani cure Lady "Imagine anybody from a small town stringing a city girl.” [advice to the lovelorn * * By Beatrice Fairfax | BY NOT WANTING IT. Pear Miss Fairfax: I have known a man for three years, with whom lam deeply In love. I used to think he loved me. but lately I can ■ not understand his actions toward me. I am acquainted with his sister, and when I go to see her and he is there he treats me very nicely and walks home with me. I always ask him to call and lie alyvays says. "Yes," but never comes. Could vou tell me how to win his love? BEATRICE O. Don't go to see his sister, if by any chance you see him. don't ask him to call. If he asks to call, plead a prom ised engagement and let him ask a sec ond time. And don't, dear, feel badly if he never comes back. You deserve a man who loves without coaxing, and this man is not that kind. ASK FOR AN EXPLANATION. Dear Miss Fairfax I am ?4 and have been deeply in love with a y oung lady four years older than myself We have known each other over three years. For two years and a half we have been engaged. Eight' months ago we did not write each other is often as usual and she soon stopped writing at all. I haw written the last three letters, but have received no an swer. HOPEFUL LYNX. These half-encagements me never desirable. If she does not write, and shows no apprehension when you don't, she no longer ca v es for you. Go to her and ask for your relations to be estab lished "n the old footing, or broken off. i Either w ould be more just to you than | I this dilly-dallying. Stories About Words It has been decided by Australian i magist iat os that eggs are not "mis sile .' Yet Sir James Murray defines I a missile as anything ' capable of being I thrown from the hand nr from a tna- I chine or engine." Eggs ar.- capable of i being thrown "Missies." like "villain."] is a word originally pleasing and re-I I speetable, ihai has changed for the I ] worse in the course of the centuries. • | "Missilia" were the sweets and per fumes thrown by the Roman emperors | among the people, and a "missile" and | a "mission" are only things sent. i 'Ballot" and '.'suffrage" show how • I language perpetuates the memory of! i primitive emthods. A "ballot" should] he a vote taken with balls—>ne of thr i various ancient Greek instruments of! secret voting. And the word "suf- | frage," w hich by some is derived from I I "suffrago," a knickle bone or ankle bone in that case* recalls an early I method of recording the vote. In early times "blackguard" was by ‘ no means a. term of reproach, but fe- 1 ferred to the low ly but honorable priv- I ■lege of carrying coal in the king's i household. PERHAPS HE IS UNABLE TO WRITE, Dear Miss Fairfax: I am sixteen and lately made the acquaintance of a man of about twenty. Recently he went on a visit, and he sent me cards while away, telling me he would be home on a certain day. He told me not to write until I heard from him. Later I went to a ball and saw his brother there, who told me my friend was sick. Now, do you think he cares for me, as I haven’t heard from him? FRANCES J. A man who is sick physically is never love-sick at the same time, and no doubt his illness has driven all thought of you out of his mind. Don’t misjudge him if you do not hear from him. If SHOWERY WEATHER FINE FOR GARDENING You couldn't get much better gardening weather than we now have if you had it made to order. The warmth and moisture make seeds fairly jump out of the ground. In transplanting vegetable and flowering plants, you couldn’t get a finer time. These showers pack the dirt around the roots and the plants hardly know they have ■ been moved. If you have one of those “cleaned up" back yards make it both useful and beautiful this summer. In our store you will find everything in the way of seeds, plants, bulbs, and fertilizers that you can possibly need. Always glad to see you in person, but if you can't come, just phone us. H. G. HASTINGS & CO. 16 W. Mitchell St. Phones 2568 HIS TEMPER NOT THE BEST. Dear Miss Fairfax: I am seventeen and have made the acquaintance of a man six months my senior. We have been very intimate until a short while ago. when I invited him to my home and then had to post pone the engagement. Since then he has treated me very coolly. How can I win his affection back again? DISAPPOINTED. If he grows angry and sulks on such small provocation, can you persuade yourself that a marriage to such a man would result in happiness? If he is angry, let him stay angry until he gets over it. Don’t apologize, don’t coax, don’t be humble. Make him realize he is in the wrong, and that you don’t like the way he acts. fijMawg———a——i—Maw—■mtm xiwunmw ■ he recovers and never writes, make up your mind to forget him. A girl of sixteen has too many opportunities ahead of her to mourn over one man. 'mm ■ ■'“'-S' .SSsrlX Wg- JF'Sk V fe/] > j ( | (Sk F** \- g - •" ofe t) // .x^7-‘7 / s anty\ —— KSrz tjTjXvill vJSXirA S{ Vo V\ 0 0 0 N A tklwhAiia; 1T z-> O (G kJpg Jk- M z-s C\ Anty Drudge on the Farm. Mrs. Farmer—“l ’spose all you fine city folks are ’way ahead of us who live in the country. ” Anty Dredge— “Goodness, no. Mrs. Farmer. I see you use Fels-Naptha; your hands are white and you have plenty of time for reading and music. You can’t °-et , ahead of the woman who uses Fels-Naptha, whether ; she lives in the country or city.” Do women cling to delusions longer than men? That’s an open question. In (Tina, men do the washing and they have been doing it in the same old way for 4,000 years. In America more than a million women have broken away from the old fashioned traditions, and have adopted the Fels-Naptha way of washing. That means cold or lukewarm water —never hot—no boiling, no hard rubbing, a saving of time, temper, trouble, fuel, clothes and health. ’ Follow directions on the red and green wrapper. ~ 0 Getting On In Life NO. 4—WRITING ENGLISH. By THOMAS TAPPER. The popular custom of keeping a di ary is a useful one even If the book when filled is never to be printed. Its usefulness consists in this; That the habit of writing something every day, even if it is not more than a report about the weather, leads to exactness. And if the writer has any pride, it will lead not only to exactness, but to neat ness. and certainly to regularity of ac tion. Practice writing is not foolish, par ticularly if your aim is to improve your use of English. Few people know how hard It is for well known authors to produce a page of "-citing that reads easily. Charles Dickens went over every sentence he wrote time and time again, and his manuscript was full of erasures and additions. Buffon. the French naturalist, wrote one of his books fif teen times, not by means of a typewrit ing machine, but with his own hand. Some authors have made it a custom to carry a note book and jot down any thought they care to consider again. From the note book they found matter for their writing. The fact is, few great writers have written easily. They have had to grasp the thought whenever it came, to jot it down in th» rough, and then to polish and perfect it. afterward. They work exactly as a man does who is carving a figure from a piece of marble. He suc ceeds because he keeps on chipping the marble with his hands, and watching th» mode] in his mind all the while. You may never be obliged to do much' writing, but if you want to be a clear thinker, you ran at least do this; Write out from memory what you remember about a chapter you have been reading. c>r. take a newspaper article you like, read it two or three times, put it aside, and then try to write it out in the shortest form you can. Benjamin Franklin, born in February, 1706. was a master hand at this kind of writing. He tells us in his autobiogra phy exactly how he did it: I met with an odd volume of the SPECTATOR it was the third. I had never before seen any of them. I bought it, read ft over and over, and was much delighted with it. I thought the "Titing excellent, and wished, if possible, to imitate it. With this view I took some of the papers, and, making short hints of the sentiment in each sentence, laid them bv a few days, and then, without looking at the book, tried to complete the papers again, by ex pressing each hinted sentiment at length, and as fully as it had been ex pressed before, in any suitable words that should come to hand. Then I com pared my SPECTATOR with th° origi nal. discovered some of my faults. And corrected them But I found I wanted a stock of words, or a readiness in rec ollecting and using them, which I thought T should have acquired before that time if I had gone on’ marking verses; since the continual occasion for words of the same import, but of dif ferent length, to suit the measure, or it different sound for tne rhyme, would have laid me under a constant necessity of searching for variety, and also have tended to fix that variety in my mind, and make me master of it. Therefore. T took some of the tales and turned them into verse; and, after a time, when I had pretty well forgotten the prose, turned them back again. ’ I also sometimes jumbled my collection of hints into confusion, and after some weeks endeavored to reduce them Into the best order, before I began to form the full sentences and complete the pa per. This was’to teach me method in Hie arrangement of thoughts.