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By Herriman Anecdotes by Famous People The Old Man Learns Something New T /Thd-s Do Vou Learaj That Aaj unripe. •'AT -1 Itw /.EAAA r Hf fefeTTF-P A\t>'1 •OftE- Y <uv cEle^TiAl HC-Pfc t djojlp Be. well. That You r TA'iTE cF VHis FRUIT -T {HAVJiKfcr AfUCM To ijLEARAI ny JU.A. , 4u> Me- faASDEM ,(L Et>E Aj Tb L03£ V I 'it TA6TE. ir Pers/aim^a; is A tSAiAfcE amis ~~o" Tot,L\je>t oaj , Aahs a FRuit I UE-RV DECEITFUL. MJ ITS 5 iHIQii \ HABIT'S), A THM)&CX- > 4a ), we should All be.) SHOOT ADy F*/ft.' i Am evei*. BEAcy FOC A ftiT CF '\Fo ■ fcF 'T FROM A FRUIT R hr IT ^HCM A ' sVEbETAdcE. J J Tula-. Bit Yf y<x Taught 'if 'aic^Hw El a C(TflusMH;u.v L POTtlUTiAl - fruit* froa' a N O one had a greater fund of short stories at her disposal titan tiie late Lady Dorothy Nevill, and one in particular that she used to relate was of a very good- natured lady who was always helping a relative of hers who was very ex travagant. Having one summer lent this feather-brained creature a .con siderable sum of money, what was her surprise at the end of the season to be applied to again in order that what were described as some pressing debts might be settled. “I am very sorry,” said the kind-hearted lady “but I can’t possibly help you again just now. In order to lend you that money some time ago I was forced to go without a motor this season. - ' "Dear me,” was the reply, “if I had only known that I should have been delighted to have lent you mine.” A Lawyer’s Story. Mr. James T. Brady, a New Y.ork lawyer, tells this amusing store. When he first opened an office in New York he took a basement room which had been previously occupied by a cobbler. He was somewhat an noyed by the previous occupant’s call ers. and irritated by the fact that he had few of his own. One day an Irishman entered. "The cobbler’s gone, 1 see,” he said. “I should think h 1 had,” tartly responded Brady. “And what do you sell?” said the visitor looking at the solitary table and a few law books. “Blockheads,” re sponded Brady. “Begorra,” said tin- Irishman, “ye must be doing a mighty fine business, ye ain’t got but on 1 : left.” Edison's Story. Mr. Thomas A. Edison was accept ing blandly a reporter’s apology for an error in a quotation. “Oh,” Mr. Kdison said, "I am rather well used to being misquoted. Electrical terms are always confusing to the lay min i. No wonder. Listen to this.” He*e Mr. Edison drew a telegram from his pocket. “I got this telegram from an assistant electrician this morning,” he said. “Listen.” And he read: “Wire with no outside outside. Put inside wire outside and outside inside. Need more outside for inside.” He Knew. It was a party of visitors seeing the sights in Pittsburg that finally entered the conservatory presented to the city by Mr. Phipps. The curator while showing them around was called away on business and left the visitors in charge of one of the clerks They came to a beautiful statue which was admired immensely. It was of translucent marble. He point ed out the excellencies of the statue, told the name of the sculptor, and showed it from every viewpoint. One asked: “Alabaster, isn’t it?" “No,” h 1 said, “Venue.” A Club Yarn. The following good story was told not long ago at one of the Atlanta clubs: One or two young officers were dining together at a restaurant one night, and the conversation be- came a discussion on lies and lying generally, and finally there was a warm debate as to who was the big gest liar known to them. An old gen tleman sitting at a table near was unable to avoid overhearing the dis cussion. and after a few minutes he rose and came over to their table. “I have just heard you decide, gentle men,” he said gravely, “that Lieuten ant Arthur is the biggest liar I am his fa- / EA10A Aium -rt’SraS' * "SS***" *-• UJE HAVE. A FCh ACf P Tn »■ vicCeJte ^ the primordial r Paraoletes of ail tw; CjEMTLE in HUMOR U)E H*p,f SORE, Moneys IfcAIAT.? I (Move V MOMF'r IuS.t'Fh/N'K I (J.VAT2 OF l Tme /doweys I An «aki\>o i\j l06Kiv& At 'This J—' UJOWOBEFyus 4MB P.FAorif UL s ^ msC At>e tye, loo 1 Rut \ Bur I STILL c An AT A Loss\ V Al ~To Hclo c XJhaT Ewbiches XYoo —j——■ 1 IT A bACAr Paiw-ter. Should orAiMT This <LSN£> SCAPES c would Some Rich C(AaJ A/oTJ \<Su/t N/m At least c - .a vsix Ms Foe. Ir ?j >AV You 7 ( Hoiu /HoAiey iThe original here l Befcpe /H&, Aty—' V AicTHiAjii- 'the / eg, ^vCost ! y 1 A barbel 1 V (jJuiCK !| By Cliff Sterrett Ma Is an Ardent Recruit C’opjrltfht, 1018, International New* Serrica. DO Sfou MEAU ToSTAMO'TMERE- Au’lELL ME ver willin' To be Classed vx/ith the 1 wAtrr You to VSME4R Oit Of The^e 'uoTes for mwomem Bul-fotJS, MA Ev/Esyeoov's i Doiu it.' <— DO sbo MEAwToTfeLL me DOWd a VOICE Ihj THE 60VEPWMEXJT? ARE Woo WILLING "To Be. CLASSED VX/ITM ~THE FELONS do you believe in VOTES For VX/OMEM, DELI CIA ? tart rr^wy Folly ne 60T yreouBLE -ENOUGH . Mow/. 1 Tee' I SHOULD WOGRy ABOUT “THE VOTE ! yJfiinMED THE VERy IJ5EAR of Such a THIM6 j j LcwilFtS AH' BUMS' n IDIOTS n l. :er aujav 'twiflr PL^ Im^ HbbkS'l FftOHl YA“t0M6OM6" USSOM TELL AA TO TELL PA THAT YOU POUREPj SHAME fc'S SKIMMT 6006LT DEPARTMENT" SHANK'S lESSOHS U 1 no. a- Sr-j 4-f ^ pfTT/J BARREL (b.&jjei, to miaBmuum JIHl CAn'T YOU meuer tell COHERE a PIN It SO IMS “ J AIN'T 60NHA PLAT ALA IN HOH ? - I 0ATCH6D YA - An YOU PRACTISE all the IWAT DOWN TO "THE -POFESSERST HOOSE ELSE «U r SISTER'S Gold fishes into the PAtJOGRAPH' HORN SEE iF^TrV 1 MMiri , —^ 1 SISTERS 60T HIMV IAT TT. COBB STUFF GONVA BE A ' HOLDOOTtV IU STICK, HERE A\0 f iff v 7 ,d-- PIPE OFF 1 OM J THE GAME) l HAFTER 1 - JAMOOSE you have ever met. ther.” After a few r seconds' embarrassed silence one of the young officers be gan to stammer apologies, but the old man waved them aside. “No, no,” he said, “don’t apologize: it’s quite unnecessary. 1 was only going to say that if you regard my son Ar thur as the biggest liar you have ever ! met you can not possibly have met my , other son, Richard.” The Editor’s Story- A certain editor is credited with having related this story: He once ordered a story of a certain length and discovered the novelist had writ ten several hundred words too many. In order to make the story fit the space at his disposal the last few paragraphs were condensed into a single sentence. This is the way it read: “Von Berken took a small glass of whisky, his hat, his departure, no notice of his pursuers, a revolver out of his pocket, and finally his life.” Mr. Barrie's Best. It is said of Mr. J. M. Barrie that he is rather shy and retiring in man ner and one of the “most enjoyable social functions” li e ever attended was, it is said, a dinner in which he turned to his neighbor and asked, “Do you converse?” “No, I don’t,” replied his neighbor. ‘Neither do I,” said Mr. Barrie, comfortably". Not To Be Believed. Mr. "Johnnie” Schofield, the come dian, relates an amusing story". A certain doctor had a patient. One day he came to the doctor in great trou ble. During the night, he said, he had accidentally swallowed a mouse. The doctor told him to get a cat and some fried cheese and to lie on his back with his mouth open and the cheese on his nose. “Then,” said the doctor, “when the mouse smells the cheese he will come up for it, and the cat will then be able to catch it.” The man thanked him and went home. But the next day he was back again in worse trouble than ever. “Well, j did you do as I told you?” asked thr ; doctor. “Yes,” said the man. “bur while I was lying on my back I fell off to sleep.* Now the cat is missing, and I'm afraid it has gone down ‘iliW Uam uxuix>w- BECAUSE iTts HEADED ONE WAY AND POINTED ANOTHER.- ORDER:,- ORDER'.. ORDER! DtfVL&tfr- dniAej ULLIAsJ lEFFLER. EIGHTH STREET- 0. S,A. MAT* KIND OP A CRIME DO A SLEEPING &0Y PEPRE^ENTjHOH * THE MATTER WITH ( HET CUT OUT THAT RACKET > YOORE BUSTIN' UP BUS/MESS 6AUJAN AlClUA pRACTre LOODER'- „ tyARUELODS EA6LEBEAK 5PRUDER. DEMONSTRATES Hd> POPULARITY WITH THE FAMS 6T QusTimg up '{ESTER DAT5 GAME ’BEFORE IT STARTED '2AUA6ER flvwn is \0SJSE PAWS*-Comp BACK HERE, THE GAME STARTS in g*., A SECOND’ J A <ENTLEftAn ) T Hf NAME OF ^ SAM Juvr phoned HE &E RKiHT CYEe AND JOIN XOU! , 0M HUOti-i - yiys Jones is te^chinc ME to TlWks't Vrot- ano i want t oj.ro dance £.?'C» M0VC DEAR cone on with US and HAMt dinner and SEE Some Loo. 'fURKfv turket YROT- cH : MORD . ' Think, T hCAli-t 6 To PEl oh the Banana OOLi-if Oh, 1 — t’s Great To 1 Be Married ! JSL ^ ®® Copyrlfht, 1&13. Internttional Kerrs Service ® ® — ® { • • • • •• •• ! 7 T ^ FDRiOU S 1 PAPER 1 / Seorge McManus s 1 ' 5L Us Boys M Eaglebeak Spruder Is Almost Too Popular R«vlst«red Iniffld State* Patent OfAea By Tom McNamara