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4 Her Lack of System One Woman’s Story By Virginia T. Van De Water. CHAPTER XXXII. M ary flktcher <nd not r<-K»in her mrenRth a* taut as her hus band thouRht she should Tie couM not understand why the doctor and nurse did not urge her to exert her self, to conquer the weakness that pos sensed her She was still In bed when the baby was two weeks old and Bert’s mother came out to Mlddlesbrook for the day to see her flrst grandchild She would not stay overnight, she said, for she did not car© to "crowd a cottage al ready overfull." If this was meant as a suggestion that Mrs. Panforth should have vacated her room during the pres- V*en*u?e of the nurse in the household, Wary did not take mnhrage at It. She had learned to submit to her mother-in- law's remarks, and to believe that back of the rough and brutally frank manner waa a kindness that could be depended upon. Therefore the young mother foresaw no unhappiness In the suggestion of Mrs. Fletcher senior that she and her daugh ter-in-law have a private chat on the afternoon of her visit, an hour before time to leave fv>r the return train to New York. The baby was sleeping quietly In his cradle, and his paternal grandmother drew a chair close to the side of Mary's bed The invalid smiled almost affectionately. “Good of You to Call." "It is good of yotir." she said, "to come out to see the baby and me to day. Early spring out here is rather cold this rear, and the walk from the atatlon Is a muddy one " "Oh, I didn't mind that," returned the nldeT woman. "I wanted to see the baby and I wanted to say something to you. ho I will get right down to that now " Then, without further preface, she In formed her startled daughter-in law of a matter that had been worrying her— Bert’s mother lately. She felt that Bert’s wife should be told that tliree times when Hert had stayed In town all night lie had come to his mother's flat, late In the evening, drunk "I wouldn’t, even for his sake, tell you this before your child was born," she ©aid. "Nor would I tell yoti until now that the love of liquor’s In his blood. At least hts father used to love It, but I watched him and ruled him so that he never got drunk after I married him And Bert n got to be broke of the habit. It's up to you, his wife, to do it" The younger woman’s wide eyes fixed on the speaker's face with a look of entreaty that made the unimpressiona ble and au#ter© woman glance away "What can I do? Please tell me!” *h© Implored. "I am so Ignorant—and so anxious!" The appeal to her superior wisdom restored the older woman’s self confi dence. and there was no note of tender ness or pity In the businesslike tones In which she replied. "That's for you to decide. A woman ought'to know how to manage a man I’ll tell you what I mean to do. The next time Bert comes to my place with fcigns of liquor on him, I'm goin’ to slam the door In his face"' An exclamation of dismay from the shocked listener did n. t move her. "No, Mary,” .she went on. 'there ain’t any use in mincin' latters with men When my son don't act like he should. I don t act to him hr the mother of a good son might net I served my hus band the sumc wav When he behaved himself, I was pleasant: when he didn't I made him pay for it. I advise you to stir yourself and set to work at Bert Take rny advice and make him afraid to drink She paused, but the wife made no answer She felt hr If she had not the etrengih to speak Her mother-ln-iaw arose "Well, it's geHin' near train time and 1 must he goln’." she observed "I made up my mind that you should have the truth and my duty's done." She moved her chair back, .the floor vibrating under her massive tread To the Hick woman the room seemed to he floating gradually away; she heard her mother-in-luw's voice a long distance off calling the nurse; she was so tlrid holding fast that she would let herself gl de off for a monrent she was floating off—off— First Thought of Baby. She came to herself with a sudden Jolt as If the boat in which she was drifting to the unkrmwn land had come to a stop full against a rock The far was sickening, and she opened her eyes with a gasp. Her face was wet and the strong smell of cologne salts whs In her nostrils The nurse was stundlng by her on one Hide, bathing her face; her mother, on the other side of the bed, was holding a bottle of salts to her nose Somewhere In the room the baby was crying She tried to speak, failed, then tried again and whispered: "Give me my baby, please!" Her mother brought the little one to hen And then, for the only time dur ing her illness, the Invalid asserted her- eelf "1 want." she said distinctly, if weak ly. "to be left alone with my mother and my baby The nurse although having no diplo ma from a training school, understood women She suggested with decision that the astonished mother-in-law leave the room, fortifying her commands with the reminder 1 have my orders from the doctor tha^ Mrs Fletcher shall be kept quiet, and I am answ’orable to him " Down stairs Bert FT etcher’s mother hurried away to catch her train back to town, bidding the nurse a brusque "good afternoon " In the darkened room upstairs. Marv, too tired to think, tell asleep, her baby close against her heart, her mother within reach of her hand For a peace ful hour Bert Fletchers wife forgot the domination of bis overpowering and crushing personality. “\Y7 inmr W qulr " V pom iTrnm th« Owrman IGmharfl R«n*rra*» Ortrin *er*tr>n Copyright^. 1918. by hi*rh«r Verlt*. Berlin. Lnsluh trAn*l»tfoo rniiq-jibt'cn 1*» TO-DAY’S INSTALLMENT. When the first of these started downtown to the Syndicate Building, the •newsboys were crying extras in the street; "All about the *»ulcid© of Sidney Wolf!" The wound came up to Allan, where he paced his office and awaited the coming of the directors. And before his eyes waa the picture of Wolfs ashy and flabby face as h© had last seen it. With It there came over him for the second time that momentary lack of confidence in himself—when he felt that the monster he had created, that had crushed out the llvea of thousands, whs surely crushing out his own. "The tunnel—the tunnel!” he said to himself over and over again, now In despair and now in grim determi nation. It would take many, many years now—more probably than would live. Would It ever survive this \>low? He wasted no time on self-reproach. If lie had handled Wolf differently, this Mtroke might have been averted, but it was too late to think of that now There was barelv time to de vise ha?*ty and shaky props and pray that they might uphold the tottering financial structure of the great enter prise and not bring down the finan cial world iri one common ruin. IE- knew what would happen when the Stock Exchange opened the next morning. One thing only could head off a terrible onslaught and that would be a wholesome financial statement from the Syndicate that would bear the X-ray. And he did not see how this was posable. Their cash had been short even be fore Wolf’s peculations. In any case they would have had to evade many obligations at the first of the year in the shape of 'nterept on their Invest ments It might have beep possible to glocs he statement over, but with the double suicide and the loss of the money—the cash he did not see how they could be saved. Nothing but a probe-proof balance sheet «*f their flmtneiHl standing would enable pub lic confidence to support them, and this was impossible. A Stormy Session. AN FOR IDEAL TRIP SEPTEMBER. The Warm Springs Hotel will remain open until Sep tember 15, and those who are acquainted with this famous watering place will find it ready and anxious to serve them with the best the country affords. This is just the season to enjoy ,the batiks and the beautiful ountry surroundings. By the time the continental bourses open to-day there won’t be a nickel in sight for anybody. The directors' meeting lasted all night, but they were not the only sleepless ones In all that city at least one man In five had some finan cial Interest, direct or otherwise, v rapped up in the great tunnel. And the head of the tunnel finances and his assistant had both killed them selves within a week. It was a stormy and grinding ses sion in the directors’ room, but when the Stock Exchange opened they had a statement ready. Thousands had hoped for a hold, reassuring an nouncement of the company’s healthy financial condition. The directors did their beat to give it to them, but the statement, as made public, fell far short of that mark. And then came the deluge. The first wave that struck the mar ket was an overwhelming flood of the ten-dollar certificates—"the work- ! lngmnn’s stock." In loss than an I hour they had dropped from par to $6. j Before noon four smaller banks sus pended p.ivment -and then the real storm broke. The big banks the Lloyd National, the American Gold Bank and the House of Manton—closely allied and identified with the Tunnel, met th** flrst stock, hut could not turn back the rush. The panic spread, as all panics do, and banks only remotely interested In the Tunnel, big, substan tlal financial torts, began to crumble to pieces. When night cam© New York had passed through the worst day in its financial history. That black day of the pnnio In 1907 was a trifle. The next morning call money was quoted at 165, and this was a bit of grim humor. It was nractically im possible ttt borrow a thousand dollars In cash In New York at any figure. This is the situation. Allan was told by young Morton, who had hasti ly been thrown into the chair left by the suicides of Ranson and Wolff. “By noon to-day there will be scarcely a bank with open doors in the United States nn»1 darned few in Europe.” The two men were sitting in Allan’s office far above the noises of the waking day in the street below. They had been there all night. Allan was j drinking mineral water by the bottle In constant little sips; he nodded to ?how that he understood. "Wltterstelner and his friends are | backing the Bank of New York City," went on Morton. "They are backing ■ i the limit ol t heir power*. They may be able to keep the doors open | and meet obligations—but that’s aJl. Our own bank can’t possibly hold up unless Mr. Lloyd gets behind It wi h every cent of his personal fortune. The New World National is getting help from the Bank of London, but every other European bank threw up brens works at the first gun. By the times the continental bourses open to-day there won’t be a nickel In sight for anybody." "Then there Isn’t anything we can do about iff 1 ’ Allan asked quietly. "Nothing—but pray for a miracle," was the grim response. N o Answer. As nearly as he had ever done sine? boyhood Allar prayed and prayed hard for this miracle But the prayer was unanswered Within three days the full weight of the crash descended on the business world and the five continents echoed with the roar of collapsing companies. Every new dav brought its new roll Funeral Designs and Flowers FOR gALL OCCASIONS. Atlanjh Floral Company 455 EAST FAIR STREET. (if commercial victims and then was added an eve.-Increasing and more sinister lint. Ranson and Wolf were not the only victims. Every hour brought its report of Insanity and nuioide and murder. One New York paper which had fought the tunnel from ie flrst. ran a black-bordered list of the victims every day under this line; "What the Tunnel swallowed to day!” And In the list were hankers and brokers and hierchanta and manufac turers and women and little children —hundreds upon hundreds But it w?s not this that affected the Money Kings The financial body of the worlu had received a ripping wound and was in danger of bleeding to death. The wheels of the world s commerce, lacking the lubricant of cash, were Blowly coming to a full Btop. Factory fires were drawn and mines were closed. No manufacturer In the world worked his plant on fud time. Millions were thrown out »»f employment. Thousands of employ ers were forced to reduce uag.*s, strike and riot followed. Industry was paralyzed. In Great Britain the industrial world actually came to a full stop for the flrst time In history. For there a general strike was de clared. In the other big producing I countries conditions were little better. I Steamers with cold funnels were j warped to the wharves of the great j seaports in long lines. In many part.® of the world the railroads wore even without oil fof fuel. The more pop ulated countries, only those that de pended on water power, could oper ate with anything like certainty. What One Man Did. And the toll of blood grew. West phalia was in open revolution, and the machine guns were working. There had been a pitched battle between strikers and regular troops in the suburbs of Liverpool. Crime stajlsti- tlcs leaped upward in bounds and food for millions rotted at wharves and railway stations while hundreds of thousands were in want. A specter of general revolution, world-wide conflict of labor and capi tal. stalked the earth. But through It all the Tunnel Company held up Its head. It was weak and tottery, but It was there. And this was the work of one man —Lloyd. When it became evident that the company must be engulfed in the gen eral ruin unless heroic measures coul 1 serve it. Allan went to Lloyd’s hone© and sat up all night with the aged but still mentally alert financier. At 10 the next morning a conference of the leading bankers and financiers of the* country, representatives of the great European houses, and the directors of the Tunnel Syndicate was held in the company’s offices. And for the flrst time time in more than a decade the great "L‘ appeared in person. There was a dead silence when he rose to address the meeting. Spar-? and slender, in a black frock coat, with his yellow-skinned, hairless, vul ture head rising above the white linen of collar and tie, his heavy-lidded eyes blinking about the room as ha slowly turned his head from side »o side, there was a suggestion of rep tilian strength, like the languid coll ing of a cobra, tuat awed even thes; masters of men and money. At his flrst words a thrill ran through th«* little gathering. "The Syndicate must not fail!" he said. The words were spoken slowly and with measured distinctness that gave them a remarkable impressive ness "The industrial situation in the world to-day is bad enough with out this final catastrophe. If we per mit the Syndicate to fail—if we do not meet our obligations on the sec ond day of January—no man can say what will follow He paused for a few moments. The hush was almost painful. "The situation to-day is the worst WHAT HAS GONE BEFORE The story opens with Rives, who is In charge of the technical work ings (if the great tunnel from America to Germany, on one of the tunnel trains, with Laermann, an engineer, in charge of Main Station No 4. They are traveling at the rate of 118 miles an hour. Rives is in love with Maude Allan, wife of Mackendrick Allan, whose mind first conceived the great tunnel scheme After going about 250 miles under the Atlantic Ocean Rives gets out of the train. Suddenly the tunnel seems to burst There 1* a frightful explosion. Men are flung to death and Rives is badly wounded He staggers through the blinding smoke, realizing that about 8,000 men have probably perished. He and other survivors get to Station No. 4 Rives finds Ha^rmann holding at bay a wild mob of frantic men who want to climb on a work train, somebody shoots Baermann, and the train slides out. The scene is then charged to the roof of the Hotel Atlantic. The greatest wts t the country are gathered there at a summons from C M Lloyd, "The Money King" John Rives addresses them, and introduces Al lan Mrs. Allan and Ethel Lloyd, daughter of the financier, are also pres ent. Allan tells the company of his project for a tunnel 3 100 miles long. The financiers agree to back him. Allan and Rives want him to take charge l of the actual work. Rives accepts. Rives goes to the Park Club to meet Wit- ) tersteiner. a financier. At Columbus Circle news of the great project is being flashed on a screen Thousands are Watching it. Mrs. Allan becomes a lonely ) and neglected woman and is much thrown in the company of Rives. Sydney Wolf, the money power of two continents, plots against Allan and Rives. Mrs Allan lias her suspicions aroused as to the frlend-sship between her husband and Ethel Lloyd. Rives and Mrs. Allan let the wine of love get to their heads and. before they know it, they confess their love for each other 'Fun nel City’s inhabitants learn something has gone wrong in the lower workings of the great bore An explosion and fire have occurred in the tunnel, and when the workers hear of It definitely they become a raging mob. surging about the entrance of the bore. Mrs. Allan is warned not t,> leave her h<'me while the excitement is at its height. But she and her child go forth. They meet a mob of women, frenzied by the disaster, who stone them to death. Rives was missing in the tunnel and Allan, his wife, child, dearest friend and 5 000 other lives gone, gave way to despair. But he resolves to conquer, not be subdued, by the great project. Gathering a relief train together he hurries into the tunnel. Near the end he comes to a pile of dead bodies. He finally rescues Rives nearly dead. After the disaster the tunnel workers. In terror, strike and the great project Is stopped. Missing the strain of work. Allan's melancholy returns and he hastens to Europe. After months of wan dering he returns and finds Rives out of the hospital, but his memory badly affected. Allan's senses swim when Rives, in a sane moment, tells him lie loved Maude, that Allan didn’t. The strike ends then Ethel brings the "dis heartening message from her father, "Watch Wolf " financial master of the tunnel, who is in Europe Wolf has speculated and lost $10,000,000 of tunnel funds. Allan asks Ransour. Wolf’s right hand map. for an accounting at once. Ransour kills himself Wolf Is summoned home an<] before Allan He prom ises restitution, but is "fired” out bodily. He decides to flee to Canada, but is truiled by detectives and finally commits suicide under a subway train. Now Go On With the Story. that the world of business has ever faced," he went on. "But we must not forget that it Is our duty to see that this black time does not grow blacker. If we fall in this crisis the Industry of the world may be thrown back half a century. We must not fall!" Again he paused. No one stirred. The slowly blinking eyes moved around the circle and the Master sooke again. Bad as is the situation, it could be worse The failure of the Syndi cate is ail that could make it worse, and the,-e is no need that the Syndi cate fall. If we proceed with wisdom and courage we can save the indus trial world from further disaster. We are the < c urt ot the last appeal in the world >f business That world that we have governed now looks to us for help. I say again, we must net fail! "So much for our duty—so much for our aim It now remains to de vise ways and means. It is not my Intention to go into details. I can leave that to the younger men who are in immediate command. But we must loose their hands—we must till their ammunition boxes. The genera! strike has worn itself out. This was inevitable. The .strike could not suc ceed because capital was as power less as labor. Not capital." he cor rected hiself, “but the field marshals of capital, the leaders of business, were crippled by an Inadequate com missary. "At all cost to ourselves we must release the cash of tbe world. We must make sacrifices—big sacrifices. In the years to come we will make it All up again But to-day we must make the sacrifices that the situation demands. "The vital point Is the necessity that the Syndicate pay every cent of interest on Its loans on the second day of January. We must stop at nothing to attain that end. "I have spoken of this as a duty. It is more than that. It is a measure of self-oresprvation. To that end 1 pledge every cent of my private for tune, every security I hold that will raise cast) at any figure. Also I pledge every dollar th4t banks now under my controljjcan raise by any means in their pow>V. "I wish to impress on you why 1 am doing this. Leaving our concep tions of duty aside, if the Syndicate falls there will be no private fortunes for us anywhere in the world. The red ruin of revolution will engulf us all!” "THE SECOND OF JAN UARY.” F OR weeks the papers of New York and the other big cities of the world had been printing encouraging reports of the financial rehabilitation of the Atlantic Tunnel Syndicate. New Y’ear’s Day was a subdued holiday in New York. There was a tense feeling throughout the city. The hotels were crowded and even the lodging houses of the poor held more than their usual quota of guests. The Syndicate had announced that it would without fail meet every ob ligation on the morning of January 2, but there were hundreds of thousands of panic-cowed men who would not believe until the money was in their hands. For the further strengthening of public confidence the announcement had been made that, wherever de sired. the payment of interest in sums up to $100 would be made in cash at the Syndicate building All sums be yond that would be paid in check and the four biggest banks in New York printed advertisements in all the pa pers declaring that they would cash any and all checks of the A. T. S. The night of January 1 was bitter cold. The thermometer hovered around the bulb, and there was a fine sifting snow, hard as sand, that whirled down between the tall build ings and cut the face like bits of glass. But, in spite of these un friendly sighs, hundreds began gath ering in front of the Syndicate build ing shortly after 1 o'clock in the morning. It was announced that pay ment would begin sharp at 9. All night long the crowd grew, and when the doors were finally swung back the newspaper reporters esti mated that 30.000 men and women were massed about the great build ing. And with a roar the great flood sucked in at one point and the build ing began swallowing them at the rate of hundreds to the minute. Inside the paying tellers were sta tioned at little windows behind long partitions. Between these partitions the horde surged, dozens of special police striving to keep some sem blance of order. Long lines were roughly formed against each little window and the human automatons behind the little brass rods dealt out money as fast as their nimble fingers would work. For more than two hours they worked without interrup tion, but the crowd outside was hard ly noticeably diminished. They were only more closely packed and covered less street space. Suddenly there was an interrup tion. You are to remember that the stock certificates ran from $10 up and the Syndicate was paying only in- tereft; so that an immense amount of small money was required. Three of the tellers were com-pelled to close their windows to go for more money. Instantly there was congestion on the floor. The long Hoes that had been formed against these windows— men and women, pushing and strain ing eagerly—were suddenly stopped. The word was passed back that the windows were closed temporarily, as the tellers had run short of change. In transit the message was badly al tered. When it reached the end of the lines and came to the crowd out side it was to the effect that the money was running short and they were closing the windows. The mob surged and heaved down Into the doorway in an irresistible mass. The pressure on the lines in creased until they were broken and crushed in. Those that held places nearest the windows clung to the railings and partitions, fearful of be ing pushed on past before they could get their money. There were curses and screams, straining and pushing and fighting, and then one great red-fisted man smashed a glass partition and bel lowed for hts money. "I’ve got $3o0 worth of certificates here and I want mv $300!” h^ roared "You can’t get it!” snapped a dis tracted teller. "You know that you can’t get anything but the interesit." No one has ever pretended to ana lyze the psychology of a mob. Every man and woman within the sound of the teller’s voice knew, and had known for months and years, that he was stating a perfectly well-known fact. But the effect was much the same as if he declared that they could not get the Interest. With a howl of raeje th©y swept forward and the partition began to sag and crackle. Hundreds were now fignting to get out of the press. They didn’t want their money. They want ed their lives. Suddenly a partition gave way and the mob. like a river breaking through a levee, swept in among the desks and tables of the offices. The clerks and tellers seized their packages of bills and money boxes ana threw them into the vaults In the twinkling of an eye, but quick as they were some were caught in the ru?h and money was strewn all ovei the floor. This was the last touch. It was pandemonium. Allan In Danger. In the midst of the uproar some leather-lunged madman yelled for Allan. The next instant the mob in side and outside the building had taken up the cry and a torrent headed for the stairs. The elevator runners had abandoned their post? at the first sign of trouble. At the tenth floor they were stopped by a solid mass of special police that had been gathered from th$ upper floors. The police gave ground slow ly. as the pressure in front of them increased. They argued and threat ened. but without avail. They had been instructed not to use violence excepting in self-defence or to pro tect the lives of others. Finally the police were backed up to the twelfth floor, and the long, black snake of humanity wound down beneath them until it mingled wi£ the press in the street. The officer.- were gathering to charge the crowd as a last resort when a terrible ally came to their aid. No one ever knew how it happened. A dropped match or cigarette in the debris of the wrecked ground floor may have started it Out of the de serted counting room into the hall and up the stairs came a long tendril of black nmoke. The Syndicate Building was in flames! THE PARIAH. A LLAN, with the directors of the Syndicate, held a meeting twj days after the fire. Their build ing was destroyed and with the build ing many valuable papers and rec ords. The greater part of these were preserved in the fireproof safes, but an appalling number of these vaults had been left open In the panic. It was a quiet meeting. The dull weight of despair hung over these men who had toiled for year^ and tolled in vain to achieve the greatest undertaking in the history of the world. They now faced a record of fifteen years of wasted effort and millions upon millions of wasted money. For at last even the indomitable Allan had given up. He looked thin and world-weary, and his gray hair had turned almost white. "If I could see the slightest hope ahead I would advise that we hold on in ?pite of everything." he said. "But I begin to believe that Fate it self Is against us. It is not so much the actual damage that the fire did. This is a wicked and unexpected blow, but we might even survive that. But the most sensible men in the countrv have become superstitious about the tunnel. Thev shrink away from you at the bare mention of it. It is im possible. now or In the immediate fu ture, to regain public confidence, and without that we are lost. I do not see anythin*’ - for it but voluntary bankruptcy.” This was the end The next day the insolvent Syndicate was an nounced, and the world stood still. That night a menacing mob gath ered in the lobby of the Park Hotel, where Allan was living. Asked to Leave. The manager, pale-faced and apol ogetic, asked "if he would mind leav ing. for a time at least.” Allan smiled understanding^. "Not at all,” he said. He telephoned to another hotel and engaged apartments. The next night the same performance was repeated. Allan found it convenient to leave Nh\v York. He thought of eoing to Tunnel City, but young O’Malley, who was in temporary charge, advised against it. He slid they were sitting on a magazine there, and the appear ance of Allan might precipitate an ex plosion. He went to Buffalo, the city wrier? he had first begun the manufacture of Allanite, the diamond steel that had made the tunnel possible. But here, too. he was threatened with vio lence and his property, mortgaged to the hilt, was marked for destruction if he remained. He tried to bury himself in Chi cago, but he was too well known to remain long concealed. And the same persecution followed him there. Hold ing himself guiltless of all crime, Al lan found himself an outlaw. The man who had been decorated by sov ereigns. honored by the greatest sci entific societies and hailed as one of the world's greatest men was hunted with curses and revilings up and dpwn the world. Even the friendliest of the news papers at last turned against him. So did many of the old directors. They saw a chance to make capital of the persecution. If Allan could, be made the scapegoat, if the entire blame for the failure could be heaped upon him. there might still be a chance to rehabilitate the company. But the campaign lost force gradu ally from lack of material, and final ly Allan received his flrst word from the Lloyds. To do them justice, this was no fault of theirs—that thev had not found him out. He had simply disappeared. At last a note from Ethel came to his hand. He was a guest for a few davs at Vanderstyfft’s country place at the time. The Note. "My dear Mr. Allan,’’ It ran, "papa suggests that I ask you to go to our farm, Turtle River, In Manitoba, and stay there as long as you like. Father may be able to join you. In any case he would like to have you feel that you are bis guest for as Ion*’’ as y;>u care to remain. I can recommend the trout fishing—also the horses. We will certainly be there within a few months if you care to remain that long. You will be glad to know that New York has calmed down to a very marked extent and father sees many hopeful signs for the future. “Cordially yours. "ETHEL LLOYD." To Be Continued Monday. HERE'S the ice pick?” in quired the ordinary man. coming upstairs from the basement and hunting languidly in the tool drawer. "Isn’t It In the drawer?” His wife came across the room to help him hunt. "Not there? Isn’t that strange? I was sure it was there!" "Strange!” The ordinary man’s tone was scornful. "Strange!” He shut the drawer with a bang. "If I’ve bought one ice pick, I’ve bought fifty! If I want to have a thing in this house wher* I can find it when I want it I’ve got to keep it chained in my pocket with my keys! I never heard of another house like It!” He put his hands Into his pockets and strode up and down the kitchen as he talked. "Here’s the ice melting and nothing to chip It with—and hotter than fury! I suppose you never dreamed that we'd need iced drinks this weather. An ordinary woman would have seen to it that that Ice pick was somewhere where it would be handy! But your mind la wandering off somewhere. The Complaint. "It’s the same way with every tor mented thing around this ranch!” stormed the ordinary man. "aat win ter could I ever find the hathet when I wanted It? No! Hatchet after hatchet I brought home, and yet as soon as I needed one there was not one to be found! You let the children play with them or sell them for brooms, I sup pose! But as far as putting them away In any regular place and remembering the spot over night—why, I’d drop dead If you ever suggested such a marvel! "Could I find the garden rake this spring? No! I had to go down and buy out the hardware store after I’d lairl in a whole new outfit last summer!” "Why,” Interrupted h!s wife, “you know yourself that you lent your gar den outfit to Mr. Daniels and he carried them away when he moved and ■” "Yes, and you expected me to come from the office and hang around when Daniels moved, to see that he didn’t carry off my property! Hang It! Why don’t you watch out for a few things! Why don't you keep your eyes open! You seem to think I am solely responsi ble for things about this place! I don’t know who is responsible if It isn’t you! You ought to see the place father had at home. There was the tool shed and it ’’ “Yes. a big tool shed—and who took rare of it? I heard your father say that he passed all his leisure time in that shed. And your mother said she never had to think of repairs—your father was so good about remembering everything. He kept all her knives sharpened and ” “I suppose you think I ought to hang around home sharpening knives, when I can get a man for half a dollar to sharpen all we ever owned! It shows how much you think of my business ability. You can’t appreciate my work.” The Retracton. "I never said I didn’t appreciate any thing. But you said your father ” "Now, we’ll leave my father quite out of the discussion,” exclaimed the ordi nary man. warmly. "He had nothing to do with the ice pick being gone. Here it is Sunday and no ice pick! I tell you It’s the same with the hammer —and with the screwdriver that I got last Christmas. I’ve never seen them ” "Oh!” exclaimed his wife. ‘T)on't you remember that you fixed up a bench in the attic with your new tools Christmas week and I’ll bet your things are up there!" “Jimmy! That’s what I did!" He took the stairs two at a time. "Yup, here they all are! Lucky I had the good sense to put them away or they'd beer all lost by this time. Shows what a good housekeeper you are not to know they’re here!” Not Slow. A reverend gentleman was addresa- inR a school class recently, and was trying to enforce the doctrine that the hearts of the little ones were sin ful and needed reg-ulating. Taking out his watch and holding it up he said: "Now, here is my watch; suppose it doesn't keep Rood time—now goes too fast and now too slow. What shall I do with it?" "Sell it!” shouted a small young ster. Not the Right Angle. A professor of art. whose absence of mind is remarkable, recently had occa sion to use a cab. Looking round, he espied one coming in his direction, drawn by a miserable specimen of horse flesh. He hailed the cabman, and was about to enter the vehicle when, look ing at the horse, he stopped, dum- founded. “What’s this, driver?” said the teach er of drawing sternly. "A horse, of course, sir.” replied the cabman. “A horse, eh?" said the professor ab stractedly. "Well, rub it out and do It over again." mum in TERRIBLE STATE Finds Help in Lydia E. Pinkham’s Vegetable Compound. Bellevue. Ohio.—"I wa.i in a terri ble state before I took Lydia E. Plnk- h a m’s Vegetable Compound. M y back ached until 1 thought it would break. I had pain* all over me. nerv ous feelings and periodic troubles I was very weak and run down ann was losing hopeo: • j ver being well and strong After taking Lydia E. Pinkham’s Vege table Compound I improved rapidly and to-day am a well woman I can not tell you how happy I feel and ! can not say too much for your Com pound. Would not be without it in the house if it cost three times the amount."—Mrs. Charles Chapman, R | F. D. No. 7, Bellevue. Ohio. Because your case is a difficult one. doctors having done you no good, do not continue to suffer without giving j Lydia E. Pinkham’s Vegetable Com | pound a trial. It surely has remedied many cases of female ills, such as in flammatlon, ulceration, displacement*, tumors, irregularities, periodic pallia backache, and it may be exactly what you need. The Pinkham record la a proud and peerless one. It 16 a record of con stani. vlotory over the obstinate Ills of woman—ills that deal out despair. It is an established fact that Lydia E Pinkham’s Vegetable Compound ha* restored health to thousand^ of such suffering women. Why don’t you try It if you need ©ooh a medicinal