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Their Married Life
By MABEL HERBERT URNER.
H
W H "
r HAT do you think we’d bet
ter get for mother?” de
manded Warren. What'd
you take her from I»ndon la*-* year?”
A chiffon scarf—don’t you remem
ber? And I don't believe ahe’a ever
worn It."
"How about a good umbrella?”
Helen nmiied. Warren always sug
gested an umbrella. It was his stock
solution for any "gm" problem*
“Wily, dear, you gave her one for
her birthday —and y*our mother never
goes out unh's* the weather's perfect.
She has three or four umbrellas that
1 don’t thin/ she's ever unrolled.”
"What aboui Carrie?” Thought of
anything for her /”
Helen made a gesture of despair.
"Dear. I don’t know—I never know
what to get her And your father—
if you'd only help me select some
thing for him!”
"Now look here. I said I’d go with
you to get something for mother and
Carrie—but that's all. Why on earth
did you put this off till the last min
ute? You should have had all these
things bought days ago.”
"I know I should.” apologetically,
"but It’s so hard to decide on pres
ents. And I kept thinking I might
see things I’d like better.”
"What’s all that. A list?” as Helen
unfolded a slip of paper she had
taken from her purse ’You’re not
going to take something to all those
people?"
"Dear. Til HAVK to! They'll expect
some little thing.”
“Well, T’d let ’em expect.” .snapped
Warren. a.«* they now got off the bus.
"It’s a blame nuisance having to cart
a lot of truck back every time we
cotne abroad .”
Warren Determined.
A few moments later they were
making their way through the crowd- I
ed aisles of the Bon Marche. War- ;
ren wag striding ahead with the grim
^determination of getting something
w for his mother and Carrie—and get
ting it quick.
They’ve got the greatest lot of
junk In these stores,” he muttered,
frowning, around at the enormous
quantity of fancy and rather tawdry
articles that are always displayed on
the first floor of the Paris shops
“Here.” pausing before a large coun
ter of handbags. “How about a hand
bag for mother
The salesgirl began eagerly to
show him the bags.
'Too cheap. Not good enough," crit
icised Warren, feeling the stiff, shinv
leather
“Oui. our. monsieur,” taking out a
tray of more expensive one*.
"No—no, none of these fixings.’’ as
the nlrl opened a fitted hag to display
the tiny powder puff mirror and scent
bottle. “This is for nn old lady: she
don’t want all that foolishness. Let’s
see a good plain hag."
The girl did not understand Eng- i
ltsh, but she saw he objected to the
fittings and now brought out a plain
black bag of the finest seal.
‘That’s not bad,” and Warren
Rla need at the price tag "Sixty
francs What’d you think?” turning
to Helen.
"Oh, did you want to get anything !
»o expensive.” anxiously, for she hRd
not thought of paying over 25 francs
for his mother’s present.
"Well, I’ve got no time to shop
around. Couldn’t get a good hag for
lean than twelve dollnre anyway. AH
right, we’ll take that,” shoving It
toward the^jirl.
A» Helen was to get the other pres- j
ents here, they decided to have a j
shopping card, so everything would
be sent together.
"Why not get Carrie a hag, too.
while we’re at it" Save time.”
"Oh. no—no, hastily, fearing he
would pay another twelve dollars for
Carrie's present. "I think she has a
good bag If you haven't time, dear.
I’ll try to get her something”
"All right.” with evident relief, get
bar an umbrella if you can’t think of
anything el re. Now. which way do I
get out of here.” looking helplessly
around the bewildering aisles crowded
wl-h women whoppers.
Helen steered him toward one of
the entrances, and he hurried xvff
with a brief
Warren Leaves.
“Take care of yourself. I’ve got a
lot to do to-day may not get 1n until
seven."
As Warren's tall swinging shoul
ders disappeared through the crowd
Helen turned back to her shopping
w ith a weighing. sense of responsi
bility. Thev were galling Wednesday,
and she Ml’ST get everything to-day.
After almost an hour’s wandering
through the shop she finally decided
on a fine hand-embroidered collar for
Carrie, and a dainty boudoir cap for
Warren's younger sister. Edith For
her own mother, vhe bought a black
?!lk shirtwaist
Then she came across a bargain
counter of gloves, real French kid
reduced to 3 francs. 6ft cents, and for
everyone whose size she knew’—she
bought gloves.
The Items on her shopping card
were counting up alarmingly. Over
130—It seemed a great deal to spend
on presents
It was almost 3 before Helen
stopped, too tired to drag herself on.
There were at 111 five names not
marked off on her list. But she would
be sick If she did not atop to rest and
have some lunch. *
She made her way out of the atore,
trying to think where she would go
for lunch. There w’ere several, hotel
restaurants near, but they would he
expensive, and Just now Helen felt
very poor She had spent so much
on presents that she felt she ought to
economize on her lunch.
Turning a corner whe found herself
In a lltle back street, narrow and
winding It was an unexpected hit of
"Old Paris” In the very heart of the
city. The j|hops were small and
quaint. Helen paused in front of what
looked like an old tavern.
A stout, comfortable-looking wom
an was sitting In the doorway, beside
her lay a big maltese cat. Beyond
Helen caught a glimpse of white-
clothed tables, a saw’dusted floor
From the glare of the nun-baked
street the place looked dark and cool
and restful.
Everything Spotlessly Clean.
The woman smiled and nodded as
Helen entered hesitatingly. There
was a bar at the back, but the two
waitresses were reassuring, and every
thing was spotlessly clean.
It was certainly cheap. Nof an
Item on the dim, violet-ink written
menu over one franc. The only dlsili
Helen recognized was “Artlchaut,”
for that was almost the same as in
English But It was only 40 cen
times. 3 cents could an artichoke be
good at that, price?”
Under the entrees was “Cervelle au
beurre nolr." The "au beurre noir"
Helen knew meant "with brown but
ter." but w’hat was "Orvelle?”
Slip pointed to the word and the
waitress tried to explain In rapid
French. But Helen still looked blank
Then, with a gleam of Insni.’atlon the
girl tapped dramatically on her fore
head. Braine! Helen hrpke Into an
appreciative laugh as the meaning
dawned on her.
The waitress, much pleased at her
own cleverness, went off smilingly
with the order for artichoke and
calves’ brains.
The brains, delicately browned in
butter w’ere served firs*, with a half-
pint bottle of claret, the order for
which the girl took for granted.
Then the artichoke was served cold,
as a salad, with a delicious Mous
seline sauce. As Helen ate It slpwly,
leaf by leaf, and sipped the claret, she
felt sne was really resting. There
was an atmosphere of peace, quiet,
and restfulness here, thar she could
not have found in the glitter of the'
big hotel restaurants.
The wnole luncheon, Including the
claret, was only 1 franc-9ft—38 cents!
The waitress took the change and her
tip with a smiling, "Mercl, merci,
madame!” And Helen left with a
very ldndlv feeling toward this quaint
little place.
Very Trying.
The glare of the street aeemed even
more trying after the quiet and cool
darkness, and she dreaded to return
to the stifling, crowded store. But
there were still several presents to
get. so reluctantly she made her way
back to the Bon Marche.
When she finished It was almost
5. Wearily, she took the bus to the
hotel, with a troubled sense of having
spent a good deal of money—and hav
ing very little to show’ for it.
Already she was beginning to worry
over her selections*. The cane she had
bought for his father—after all he
bad so many canes. And why had
she chosen a boudoir cap for Edith,
who was so clover in making such
things herself And the dresser scarf
for Mrs. Stevens—it did not seem
enough to take her. And what HAD
possessed her to buy a traveling work
box for Aunt Mary—who never trav
eled ?
For the rest of the evening Helen
worried herself almost sick over the
presents. Whatever she had bought
she wished now snv had bought some
thing else.
Why should she feel compelled to
t,nke back a lot of presents from
every trip? she thought rebelllouslv.
Surely the extra expense of traveling
\\ ore lmavy enough wl.hout tbia add
ed strain on their purse
The next time Hut Helen knew’
In her heart that the next time would
he Just the same. She would spend
the same time ami money taking
back things to the "folks at home.”
And whatever she took, she would
feel, and THEY would feel, that it
should have >een "something differ
ent” or "something more ”
Non-Collapsible Aeroplane—A Wonderful Invention
- . . .. . . M| , - - - - - .rpi- n.n n n nr m- ■ — — —.......
HERE ARE PICTURES OF
THE MOST WONDERFUL AER
OPLANE IN THE WORLD.
THIS AEROPLANE IS TO
THE AIR WHAT THE LIFE
BOAT IS TO THE SEA IN
OTHER WORDS, IF TURNED
OVER IT IMMEDIATELY
RIGHTS ITSELF!
THIS MACHINE HAS BEEN
INVENTED, TRIED OUT SUC
CESSFULLY AND IS BEING
BUILT BY LIEUTENANT
DUNNE, OF THE BRITISH
ARMY. IT HAS TWICE FLOWN
r
e
e • •
Cupid in an Auto
By BEATRICE FAIRFAX.
5 >.
i&ggaaa:
! FIX ED VERTICAL
5i0t CURTAIN
MOVEABLE
GONTROLUNG
ri.Ai>s
passenger's SEAT
TANKS \. ■ /PILOT'S SEAT
MOVEABLE CONTROLLING
FLAPS
' ■ ...
t *“' ; *■ FIXES
- / VERTICAL SIOE
JL curtain '
■ - .-l.
'Vw.
ACROSS THE ENGLISH CHAN
NEL. THE MACHINE IS CON
TROLLED SIMPLY BY TWO
LEVERS WHICH WORK A
FLAP AT EACH END OF THE
WINGS. THE BIPLANE IS AS
AUTOMATICALLY STABLE AS
ANYTHING YET PRODUCED.
IT FINDS ITS OWN "BANK,”
IT CAN NOT DO A NOSE DIVE
OR A SIDE SLIP, AND MANY
OF THE GREATEST AUTHORI
TIES PREDICT THAT THIS IS
THE TYPE OF MACHINE OF
THE NEAR FUTURE.
THE INVENTOR HIMSELF
ADMITS THAT IN ITS PRES
ENT STAGE IT IS CAPABLE
OF CONSIDERABLE IMPROVE
MENT; YET ONE CAN EASILY
APPRECIATE THE FACT
THAT WHEN HIS IDEALS
HAVE BEEN REALIZED A
VERY GREAT ADVANCE WILL
HAVE BEEN MADE. IN ITS
PRESENT FORM THE CHIEF
OBJECTION TO THE DUNNE
MACHINE IS THAT IT IS
HEAVY AND COMPARATIVE
LY SLOW, BUT IT UNDOUBT
EDLY FULFILS THE INVENT
OR’S CLAIMS TO AUTOMATIC
STABILITY.
THOSE CLAIMS ARE THAT
THE MACHINE CAN NOT BE
TURNED OVER TO A DANGER-
UtiBZ3
OUS ANGLE IN THE AIR, AND
THAT ANY ONE WITH SUFFI
CIENT SENSE TO DRIVE A
MOTOR CAR CAN DRIVE IT.
IT IS NECESSARY TO REAL
IZE THAT ANY WELL-DE
SIGNED MODERN AERO
PLANE WILL RIGHT ITSELF
IF BLOWN OVER SIDEWAYS
BY A GUST, PROVIDED IT HAS
ROOM TO FALL AND
STRAIGHTEN OUT AFTER
WARD. THE POINT ABOUT
THE DUNNE IS THAT THE
SAME GUST THAT BLOWS IT
UP ON ONE SIDE PASSES ON
AND BLOWS IT UP ON THE
OTHER SIDE AS WELL; SO
THAT, INSTEAD OF ROCKING
WILDLY FROM SIDE TO SIDE
AND DROPPING A CONSIDER
ABLE DISTANCE BEFORE IT
RIGHTS ITSELF, THE DUNNE
MACHINE ROLLS GENTLY
AND RISES AND FALLS AL
MOST ON AN EVEN KEEL.
CONSEQUENTLY THE PILOT
DOES NOT HAVE TO FLY THE
MACHINE; HE MERELY DI
RECTS IT. THE DIFFERENCE
IS VERY MUCH THAT BE
TWEEN A RACING SKIFF
WHICH HAS TO BE BAL
ANCED BY THE OCCUPANT
AND A LIFEBOAT WHICH
BALANCES ITSELF.
DEAR MISS FAIRFAX:
I have been keeping company
with a girl for about eight
months, during which time she
hag on several occasions given
evidences of her love toward me,
and. of course, she was recipro
cated.
Lately, however she Insisted
upon going with another young
man, who, unfortunately, owns an
automobile, and has at different
times taken her out Joy riding.
I’m positive that this girl does
not love or even like this young
man, but as she has told me, goes
out with him for fhe pleasure of a
ride I’m afraid that in the long
run she will learn to love this
young man and forget me alto
gether.
What other thing, outside of
buying an automobile, which I
can not afford, would be advis
able under the circumstances, to
keep this girl from going out
with him?
Kindly accept my anticipated
thanks for an early advice.
AUTOMOBILE TROUBLED.
H ONK, honk—chuff, chuff—here
It comes rlgiht down the middle
of the road, the big, red au
tomobile—and poor little Cupid has
to sit down in the dust and watch
It go by.
So she goes a-riding with the
young man with the machine, not be
cause she loves him, but because
she loves the machine, does she.
What a silly, silly little girl. And
w’hat a very 1 human one.
It Is fun to sit up there in the Free-'
soft, easily-cushioned seat—and smile
to see how dusty t'he road is there
in the footpath.
It is fun to pass everything in the
road—to see the landscape fly by like
a shadowy dream. It is fun to tell
the rest of the girls the next day
about the run Into the country or the
speed we made on the Stone Mountain
road. It’s fun to be In things right
In the very midst of them. It’s fun
to have what everybody else wants
and can’t seem to get. It's fun to
look superior and ask the wondering
others how ever they manage to keep
machine starts. It's fun to make you
Jealous, too—poor, foolish you, with
your wistful eyes and your faithful,
grieved heart—but do you know who
I pity all the time? The poor lad
with the machine.
Think a minute, don't you—honest
ly now?
Which would you rather be—the
auto youth there In the machine with
the girl liking his machine and laugh
ing at him—or you there In the shade
by the road with the girl’s heart in
your keeping?
Poor man In the machine — there's
nothing to him—but hie machine—
how can you feel anything but sorry
for him?
The girl—what shall you do to keep
her from going with the machine and
the man?
Not a thing, not a single, tiny thing
—this Is your chance to find out ex
actly the kind of girl she is—you
couldn’t have a better one if you
planned a dozen years. Which does
tihe girl care most for—you or a ma
chine? What Is it she wants in life—
love, sympathy, companionship — or
money, show, ease?
Now's the time to And all this out
—before the wedding bells begin to
ring. Don't wait till you're In town
trying to earn the money to make the
first payment on your little home—
the home you have dreamed of so
long—and then discover some fine day
that the girl you married is dissatis
fied with you—because she has to do
her own work and help save the bank
balance.
Don’t try to make that, girl you
think you love over, young man; you
can't do it. She's what she Is—and
always will be—and neither you nor
anyone else on earth can change t^er.
If she's a peacock, don’t try to
make yourself think she's a neat lit
tle brown hen, and then be sick and
sorry when she refuses to Btay in the
barnyard with you, but wants to strut
somewhere with the rest of her gay,
vain family.
Honk, honk—chuff, chuff—the man
with the automobile—he’s the best
friend you and the little girl who’s
trying to decide between you. ever
had. He’ll help you decide the, great
question, and decide it the right way,
and whisper. I tvouldn’t be too cross
with the little girl, Just yet. anyhow;
she'll decide for you, see If she don't,
and then Just tihink how proud you’ll
be of her decision.
Women’s Frocks
w
BEHIND CLOSED DOORS
By ANNA KATHARINE GREEN
One of the Greatest Mystery Stories Ever Written
SEEING THINGS
Whether it's through a field glar.s.
opera glass, tleacopes or a pair of
Kryptok eyeglasses he sure they
are from "Moore's." "Moore" qual
Ity is our watchword. "We sell
everything to see with." Jno. L.
Moore & Sons, expert opticians, 42
North Broad street.
Worth It.
"Prisoner at the bar," said the
Judge, "is there anything you wish
to sav before sen-tence Is passed upon
you ?"
"No my lord there is nothin’ I care
to say; but if vou’ll clear away the
tables and chairs for me to thrash
my lawyer, you can give me a year
or two extra.”
Mixed in Her Dates.
Do you love me, darling?
Yes. Jack dear.
Jack! You mean Harold, don’t |
He
She
He-
you?
She Of course! How absurd
j am! I keep thinking to-day’s Sat
urdav.
The Best Food-Drink Lunch at Fountains
CtMjjt A
WT insist Upon
S HORLICK’S
Avoid Imitations—Tako No Substitute
Rich milk, malted grain, in powder form. More healthful than tea or coffee.
For infants, invalids and growing children. Agrees with the weakest digestion.
Purenutrition.upbuildingthewholebody. Keep it on your sideboard at home.
Invigorates nursing mothers and the aged. A quick lunch prepared m a minute.
(Copyright. 1813, by Anna Katharine
Green.)
TO-DAY’S INSTALLMENT
•• 'You are in a frightful position. I
see that You have married Dr. Cameron
and are expecting his presence every
moment at the door If she is seen, you
are lost, for you could not bear a com
parison with her. point for point, how
ever perfectly you carry off her appear
ance when alone What then is to be
done? 1 can see but two alternatives
Either acknowledge the whole and re
lease the doctor a course I certainly
should advise -or you must trust me
with this body to dispose of as I think
fit.’
•’ ‘1 can not tell Dr. Cameron.' was my
answer. I have married him and 1 mean
to live wdth him. He would wish it if he
knew He loves me and there Is no
Genevieve now. I hurt no one by my
action and I save everybody from deep
and lasting pain.'
"His Up stern as iron. Just quivered
for a moment jjs if he denied thifr last
assertion, but he said:
" 'IJsten. then, I will help you. Mil
dred because, hard-hearted as l am.
T pity you. When you are gone—you
are going on a wedding journey. I pre
sume ”
”1 nodded.
•* 'I will carry Genevieve out. secretly
If t can. openly If l must, and putting
her in my phaeton drive her to Mrs.
Olney’s house My driver is with me but
I will dismiss him. and by taking every
precaution possible to avoid observation.
I may succeed in getting away from the
house unnoticed. If I do. I will say she
took poison on the route; if I do not.
that she is ill. and that I l>Ang a phy
sician and her engaged husband. 1 ain
taking her home In either case I shall
declare her to be Mildred Farley, and
to this story I shall cling till you your
self inform me that your husband knows
the truth and that It is useless to per
sist in the lie any longer. Do you un
derstand me, Mildred?’
"1 signified that I did, and he went on.
" ‘I think I can manage it so that you
will be saved from all Inquiries If I
do not. remember that you are Gene
vieve Oretorex. and play your part well
Now . where is the bottle from which slid*
took the acid?’
"I showed him. and he picked it up
and put It in his pocket. He had.
hardly done this when 1 heard my hus
band’s rap.
" 'Put out the light.' he motioned.
‘And keep him out of the room at all
hazards.’ he added, in the lightest of
whispers
"I did as be bid, and succeeded in
getting another moment alone with him
" ‘Have you her veil?’ he asked.
"I had not. and knew not w’here to
find it.
" '1 must have ode. he said, ’to throw
over her face.’
**I t>*$sed him the one I had intended
to wear myself He took It, and I has
tened to gather up my own clothing
and leave the room.
"When I went back again, it was with
refer. Remembering that Dr. Moles-
worth. in all probability, knew nothing
about the house wo were In. I took
occasion to ask this man. as he lifted
up’ my trunk, who was In the kitchen.
He answered, ‘No one but the caterers,
ma’am.’ After which l inquired if the
back stairs were clear, and, being told
they were, advised him to take the
trunk down that way, to which he re
plied that he intended to. I finished
by asking him to go around with the
carriage to the side entrance, where I
should have some money to give him.
Thus, 1 freed the back stairs and gave
to Dr. Molesworth. listening near, a hint
of the way he should go. I suppose he
acted upon it, byt never having had
tlie opportunity to speak to him again
alone, 1 do not know’ anything more i
about it than the rest of the world
"Of the events following that dreadful j
night, you already are acquainted. J
From a belief that Dr. Molesworth had
succeeded in his undertaking. I was sud
denly awakened to the consciousness
that from some error in judgment he
had laid himself open to the worst kind
of suspicion.
“Was it a shock, do you think? And
when in a still more dreadful hour that
suspicion shifted to myself and I saw
the secret upon which depended iny
honor and happiness threatened with ex
posure, do you wonder that my integri
ty succumbed to my fears?
"Driven by the instinct of self-pres
ervation to subterfuge and prevarica
tion, I soon found myself entangled In
a network of deceit. Even when I told
the truth as I did to the inspector at
the time he pressed me to give him
the name of the woman w r ho made my
dresses, I followed it up with a lie to
my husband. For while the half coy,
half audacious admission that I had
made them myse>lf was calculated to
silence the man whose question I feared,
it would hardly have helped my cause
with the doctor, who had been told
more than once how helpless Genevieve
Gretorex was with her hands
"And so the vain struggle went on un
til it was suddenly made apparent to me
that my husband’s respect was giving
way before my duplicity.
"Then, in an agony of remorse/1 took
an oath, the keeping of which ulti- I
mately brought on the revelations I
feared. But I can not regret this. It
has slain my husband’s love for the
false Genevieve, but from the ashes of
this passion I hope to see arise a love
for Mildred Cameron that will in time
make the happiness of my life
"It is the aim of my existence to be
henceforth worthy of that happiness."
(THE END.)
A Bad Actor.
"So you want to join our company?”
said the theatrical manager to the
seedy-looking applicant. "In what
pieces have you ever appear <'
"Well," replied he, "my las
ment was with 'The Bl' p
’Scutcheon.’ ”
"What character did you
"I was the Blot.”
TETaL, wall, well, what a sensa-
' tion w’e are creating, sisters.
Talk about the emotional
sex! Did you ever hear the like of
the commotion about the womens
new sort of frocks?
They arrested two perfectly nice
girls in Portland, Oreg., the other
day and sent them home In a taxi be
cause the policemen didn’t approve of
their skirtycoats They fined a wom
an in Kansas City last week for the
cut of her dress, and In New Eng
land they are thinking of passing a
law* about what shall be worn and
what shall be left off. Dear me! I
never had the least idea our clothes
were so important.
How much less interest we do take
In the w’ay men drees.
Can you fancy the women calling
out the police because they didn’t
think men were dressed properly?
They would look the other way and
never even mention brother’s eccen
tric clothes. And unless they were
very bathing suity indeed, they would
never even know that there was any
thing at all peculiar about them. 1
wonder why?
I heard them talking about It at
dinner the other night, the men—ona
middle-aged and two young—and, oh,
the things they said about us for
speaking to the women who wore
'em! And yet do you know I hap
pened to be wMth the middle-aged
man when we met two of the ladies
who shocked him so. and I thought
he looked rather pleased than other
wise.
Still he seemed so cross at dinner!
Isn't it odd?
"But my wife " said the middle-
aged man.
"But my sister ” said the young
man.
"But my sweetheart ” said the
other young man. And I do believe
that every one of the three was per
fectly willing to have somebody else’s
wife and somebody else's sweetheart
and somebody else’s sister be as mod
ern as the latest fashion plate from
Paris. So It Is evident that they* no
not think the new fashions ugly—isr’t
it?
I wonder what It all means—this
sudden return to the "altogether” 'n
the way of dress or undress
Some of the frocks are really—er
—and when you see the faces of the
women who wear them—ntos, friend
ly, decent faces—Just the sort of
women you’d pick out to pal wdth In a
long ocean trip. If It wasn’t for thei’’
astonishing frocks—good women,
modest women, kind women, women
who wouldn't think of "breaking up
a home,” and yet—what In the world
does it all mean?
Are women getting worse and less
modest? Have the ragtime songs
really struck in, and do nice women
think of things they never used even
to know existed? Or are they getting
nicer and more modest and cleaner
minded—so clean minded that they
don’t see anything so very interest
ing in a trim ankle and don’t under
stand why anyone else should, and
are going to let It go at that?
After all, the most immodest
frock I ever saw was a nun’s dress
at a masked ball. The dress was all
right, but the woman who wore it
made it a horror. Are we getting so
that we can think of something be
sides sex, we women, and do we
walk abroad clad In these very sug
gestive garments without meaning a
hint of a suggestion at all? Are we
evoluting or are we sinking back?
"Whither,” In fact, "are we drift
ing?” The meanest man I know acts
exactly like the most generous ones.
Sometimes It’s hard to know which
is which. It has always been ad
mitted that absolute innocence and
unscrupulous boldness had an amaz
ing family resemblance. What are
we getting to be, we women—bold
faced jades or open-browed inno
cents?
Are we reading and working and
thinking so much that we’ve forgot
ten all about the primitive facts of
life, or don’t we think about any
thing but those facts?
Doesn’t it mean a thing, the old
superstition about the natural mod
esty of women, or does It mean so
much that you simply can’t fathom
it at all? Who’ll answ’er?- Who
knows?
Not the men—oh, never, never, the
men—not even those who pride
themselves on the fact that they
‘know women.”
But really, now, gentlemen and
brethren, haven’t you just a little
bit of a faint inkling of how funny,
how outrageously funny all this
shocked surprise is on your parts?
Now, if you were all burlesque
managers ?
Business Is—after all is said and
done—business, isn’t It? But—just
plain everyday men who have to
pay go to musical comedies—tell
us. do, why do you Just show such
alarming symptoms of outraged
virtue?
It would be edifying to know,
and n\aybe your attitude wouldn’t be
so incredibly funny—If we Just
knew. Do tell us.
INDIGESTION?
Stop It qulokly: Have your grocer send
you one flos. bottles of
SHIVA R
GINGER ALE
Drink with meals,
and it not prompt
ly relieved. get
your money back
at out expenae.
Wholesome d el i -
clous, refreshing.
Prepared with the
celebrated Shiver
Mineral Water and
! the purest flavoring materials.
SHIVAR SPRING, Manufacturer*
SHELTON, 8. C.
C. L. ADAMS CO„ Distributors, Atlanta,
No Wonder.
"Do you play any instrument, Mr.
Jimp?”
"Yes; I’m a cornetist.”
"And your sister?”
"She’s a pianist.”
“Does your mother play?”
"She’s a zitherist.”
"And your father?”
"He's a pessimist.”
Despondent?"
KODAKS-S,
First Class Finishing and En
larging A complete stock Urns,
pla f es, papers, chemicals, etc
Special Mall Order Department for
uut-of-town customers.
Send for Catalogue and Price Llet.
A. ft. HAWKESCO. hodtk Ooarfoea'
14 Whitehall 6t. ATLANTA. QA.
Rare yon f r^quent headaches, a coated
tonguo, bitter taste in the morning,
‘ heartburn,’’ belching of gas, acid ris
ings in throat after eating, stomach gnaw
or burn, foul braath, dizzy speila, poor
appetite?
A torpid liver ie the trouble
in nine cases out of ten
Dr. Pierce’s Golden
Medical Discovery
is a most efficient liver invigorator, stem- H
ach tonic, bowel regulator and nerve I
strengthened ■
| Your Druggiai Can Supply Yee
[ccessortes
Jl
Cupid couldn’t And a daintier helpmate than HID.
Liquid HID prevents excessive perspiration and
odor. Cream HID deodorizes perspiration and
keeps yon pure and eweet
HID, Liquid or Cream, 25c
All Jacobs’ Pharmacy Stores