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American Sunday Monthly Magazine Section
ootie ar the
anl-c
H, how do you do? Are you the
Paying Teller? Well—that is,
could I please see somebody
else? You see, I’ve just opened
an account, and 1 want to get
some of my money out. There’s
the loveliest hat in Featherton’s
window, marked down to
but, that’s just it; if I get my money from a Pro
fessional Teller, he’ll tell all about my private affairs,
and how much I pay for my hats, and everything!”
“Not at all, Miss. We are called Tellers because
we never tell anything about our depositors’ affairs.
We’re not allowed to.”
“Oh, how lovely! Well, then,—if you won’t
tell,—I’ve never drawn a check before, and I don’t
knowhow! Will you help me? ”
“Certainly; but I must ask you to make haste.
Have you a check-book?”
“How curt you are! I thought you’d like to
help me. Men ’most always do. Yes, I have a
check-book,—that other clerk gave it to me. But
1 don’t like it, and I want to exchange it. See,
—it has a horrid, plain black muslin cover! Don’t
you have any bound in gray suede, with gilt edges?
I’m willing to pay extra.”
“We have no other kind, Miss. How much
money do you want?”
“Why, I don’t know. You see, Daddy put a
thousand dollars in this bank for me,—I suppose
I may as well take it all at once. What do you
think?”
“I think probably your father meant for you to
take only a part of it at a time.”
“Yes; I think so, too. He said it would teach
me business habits. He chose this bank because you
have a special department
for ladies. But if this is it,
I don’t think much of it. To
be sure the plate glass and
mahogany are all right,—but
it looks like ‘put up com
plete for $74.99.’ Don’t you
think Mission furniture and
chintz would be cosier? Yes,
yes, I’ll draw my check! Do
give me a moment to draw
my breath first. You see
I’m not used to these things.
Why, with a real bank ac
count of my own, I feel like
an Organized Charity! I
suppose I ought to hunt up
some Worthy Poor. Well,
I’ll just get that hat first.
Now, let me see'—Oh, yes,
of course you may help me,
but I want to do the actual drawing myself. It’s
the only way to learn. Why, when I took Art Les
sons, I made a burnt-wood sofa-pillow all myself!
The teacher just stood and looked at me. He said
I had Fate-sealing eyes. Why, you’re looking at
my eyes just the way he did! You seem so rattled,
why do you? Don’t you know how to draw a
check, either?”
“Oh, yes, indeed; I have drawn millions of
checks ”
“Millions of checks! How exciting! What do
you do with all youf money? ” , •
“Oh, it isn’t my money, you know.”
“Aren’t you ashamed to be drawing millions and
billions of other people’s money? 1 have a friend
who is engaged to a bank president who got caught
drawing checks.”
“Excuse me, but how much money do you want
to draw?” ^ . „
“How much is it customary for ladies to draw . ^
“Well, that depends upon how much they need.
“ Oh, I see. People in need draw* more than those
in comfortable circumstances, I suppose. I am not
exactly what would be called ‘a needy person.
Since I left school, of course, I have my own allow
ance. Do you approve of girls being put on an
allowance? or do you think it is nicer for t em o
100.
<<
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'uimr
“If I get iny money irom
a professional Teller he’ll
tell all about my private
affairs ”
“Then I won’t take my money, thank you. I want to take this check home to Daddy ”
have accounts with the trades-people, and not be
treated like children?”
“I should think that would depend. Would a
check for $100.00 be enough for you to-day? What
did you have in mind to use it for?”
“I think you are very impertinent. I am sur
prised that people in banks are allowed to ask such
questions. Why should you concern yourself with
how r much money I want?”
“I w 7 as endeavoring to help you about your
check.”
“Oh, yes, certainly. How could you possibly
draw 7 checks if you didn’t know 7 how much the checks
w r ere to be! I like checks much better than stripes
or plaids. Lucille is making me a beautiful walking-
suit that is the loveliest imported check that you ever
saw 7 . And checks are nice for men, don’t you think? ”
“Is it for the hat or for the suit that you
want to draw a check?”
“Yes, of course, it is for the hat at
Featherton’s that I w r ant the check. I
am afraid you will think that I am so
•ally, but really I have so many things to
think about that it is hard to keep my
mind on just one thing. You must make
allowances for girls who have so many
things to think about. Of course, with
a man like you, who only has checks and
money to think about all day long, it is so
easy—I’d be bored if I had nothing but
money and checks all day. I should
think it would be diverting to have somebody call
and talk about something else.”
“It is. Come now 7 . Let us make out this check.
You must w r rite the number first.”
Oh, isn’t it exciting! Now, wait, let me do it.
You just w r atch out that it’s all right. But are you
sure you know how yourself? I’d rather have an
Expert to teach me. You know 7 , nowadays, skilled
labor counts in everything.”
“I assure you I’m competent in this matter, but
I must beg you to make haste. Write the number
in this blank.”
“What number?”
“Number one, of course. It’s your first check.”
“There! I knew you were ready to tell every
thing! Suppose it is my first check. I don’t want
everybody to know it. Can’t I begin with a larger
number, and then go right on?”
**»
Oh, I don’t know. I guess
I’ll begin with 4887. I can make
lovely 7’s. Don’t you think 4887
is a pretty number?”
“Very pretty. But ”
“Now you're wasting time.
There, I’ve written the number.
What next?”
“The date, please. And the
year.”
“Well, I’ve written the date,
but it spilled all over the year
space. It doesn’t matter, though,
’cause it’ll be the same year for
a long while yet, and this check will be vouched, or
whatever you call it, before the year is out.”
“But you must write the year.”
“ But how can I, when there isn’t room?”
Tear that up, and begin a new check.”
And w 7 aste all that money! Oh, I didn’t want
an account, anyway! I told Daddy it w 7 ould make
me more extrav
agant! And
you’re so cross
to me! And here,
I’ve spoiled a lot
of my money the
first thing!”
“Oh, no, you
haven’t! There,
there, don’t look
so distressed! I’ll
make it all right
for you.”
“You’ll make it all right! How dare you, sir?
Do you dream for a moment I’d take your money
to replace my ow r n losses?”
“Now 7 , wait, you don’t understand. This check is
worthless until it’s signed. Now 7 , we’ll tear it out, so,
and begin again. Make smaller letters and figures,
can’t you?”
“Oh, how 7 cute that check comes out! You just
tear it by the little perforated dots, don’t you? Let
me tear one out!”
“Write it first; you’ll probably spoil it, and have
to tear it out.”
“How unkind you are! And I’m doing my very
best. Don’t find fault with me,—please don’t!”
“Well, don’t w 7 rinkle up your nose like that,—it
looks like a crumpled rose petal! And don't w r rite
your name there! That’s the place for the amount! ”
“Oh,w 7 hatafuss! What does it matter, solongasall
the spaces are filled? My goodness, the check’s all done,
isn’t it? And it’s quite entirely all right, isn’t it?”
“Yes, it’s irreproachable. How will you have the
money?”
“And here I’ve spoiled a lot of my money
the first thing”
“If I take the money, do I have to give you this
check?”
“Certainly.”
“Then I won’t take my money, thank you. I want to
take this check home and show 7 it to Daddy. He’ll be so
pleased and proud! I know 7 he’ll keep it as a souvenir,
and then he’ll give me some of his money for the hat! ”
I T isn’t because the china is thinner! That, I
know 7 , is the obvious reply, but it isn’t true, for
much of the thinnest and apparently most
fragile china will sustain a shock that would shatter
the cheapest earthenware. It is really a condition
of the mind and has recently been studied as a
peculiarly interesting problem of psychology. It is
really because it is costly that it is most easily broken.
A simple illustration will make this clear. Sup
pose a piece of wooden sidewalk, three feet wide,
extends along a street for half a mile, no person—
certainly no sober person—would have the slightest
difficulty in walking on it and would never dream of
the possibility of stepping off it into the mud on
either side. If that sidewalk be flanked by a deep
ditch on either hand, one will pass over it with cau
tion. If it be a short bridge over a gully ten feet
timid persons will hesitate to cross it, none but
workmen accustomed to great heights or profes
sional gymnasts would care to walk twenty or thirty
feet of it if it were suspended between two buildings
three or four stories above the pavement, and if the
same were swinging over Niagara Falls, as before
without handrail or any protection, no more than
one person out of every hundred thousand would
attempt to cross by such a “narrow” path from the
United States to Canada. Yet the pathway is as
wide as it was when a sidewalk on the street.