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Charlie Case Talks About His Folks--in Vaudeville
EFORE telling you all a few things about my
B immediate family, I thought maybe you'd be
glad to hear some of the nice complimentary
things that have been said about me lately. I've
been making a tour of the suburbs this Spring, such
as Denver, St. Louis, Chicago, Pittsburgh, Rhode
Island and Ohio.
I have a few clippings which might be alluded
to as press notices. Very nice. Listen to this one:
“We wish Charlie Case would soon return to New
York.”—Pittsburgh Press.
Here's one from the Denver Nugget—a little ad
vance notice on my reappearance in that city: “We
hear Charlie Case is coming back next week. We
don’t know what act hell do, but we hope it will
pe the last.”
I hardly know how to proceed with my act before
you—you seem to be such a Missourified kind of an
audience. Sometimes I just sing a song, walk off,
and let the audience call me back. And sometimes
they fool me.
The manager of this theatre {s & very good friend
of mine. He never kids people, but he’s genuinely
complimentary. 1 met him in New York Monday
morning before 1 came down here, and he asked
me if I was going to eing I told him yes, I bad a
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PICTURES, VAUDEVILLE. | {{{l
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SUNDAY M &ML, CAN s
—) ATLANTA, GA., SUNDAY, JULY 19, 1914, £lf —
By T. E. Powers, the Famous Cartoonist.
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Do You KNow
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brand new song with just one word to it. He said
he was glad of that. Wasn’t that lovely of him?
Then I asked him if he wanted to hear it before
I went on, and he said yes, he thought it might be
safer. So we went up an allay and I sang it for
him. Then I asked him if he thought it would be
better if I'd walk off right after the song. He said,
“You can if you want to, but I'd advise you to run.”
Did I ever tell you what a wonderful girl Sister
Mary is? She’s beautiful, and just as kind as she is
beautiful. So kind to her mother, too. If there's
any hard work to be done around the house, and
mother doesn’t know how to do it, Mary always tells
her,
Sometimes we go to parties, and the boys take
turns in a game where they are blindfolded and
run around the room and catch the girls. When
the boy catches a girl, he either has to kiss her or
give her a dollar. Well, do you know, Mary would
many a time come home from these parties with
thirty-ive or forty dollars.
And there’s my brother, Hank Fine boy, Hank.
Honest and honorable in every way, but he will
steal. And there’s father—well, everybody knows
that if he didn’t drink he'd be mayor of the city.
Still, father never drinks mdre than ke can stand.
Copyright, 1914, hy the Star Company. Great Britain Rights Ressrved, o
Copyright, 1014, bty the Star Commpeny. Great Britsin Rights Beserved,
A BY ALL MEANS
1 SEE BY THE LET US Go To
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1f he can't stand any more he just lles down and
quits—until he can stand up again. Every now and
then father comes home and hesitates in the door
way. Mother, hearing a little disturbance, goes out
and takes a look. Then she comes back and says
to us:
“Boys, your father’s been drinking, I fear.”
Then we’d go out and take a look, but we couldn’t
tell. We'd think he was dead.
Whenever father gets like that he commences o
talk about his animals. 1 don’t know where he
keeps ’em, but he starts to tell us about his octopus,
and his tiger, and buzzard, and two lizards and a
moose. They must be starving or sump'n, because
the doctor tells father if he doesn't do sump'n for
‘em he’ll dle.
Father was talking to the minister the other day,
and the minister wanted to know why father had
molasses rubbed in the lining of his hat. Fatner
told him it was to prevent sunstroke. But he ddn't
tell him it was the same hat he took up the con
tribution with in church.
And father’s a great sporting man, too. Oh, how
he does love horses. Regular expert on horses—can
tell you anything about a horse. Why, if there are
a hundred horses in a barn, father can walk right
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into the bunch in the dark and pick out a good one.
He just slaps him on the back and says, “That’s mine!”
A little while ago father had a wonderful horse.
That horse could run a mile longer than any horse
1 ever saw. And talk about strong lungs! Well,
you could hear ‘em all the way across the street. A
gypsy sold him to father for $l2. Sald he was a
circus horse, and, belleve me, we had one with him.
That gypsy said the horse would do tricks, any
thing he asked him to do. So first thing the gypsy
sald to the horse was, “Walk lame.” And the horse
did it right away.
We started to take him home, when father sud
denly remembered that he had forgotten to ask the
gypsy the horse’'s name., So he called him every
thing he could think of.
Mother 1s the family historian. History’s her
specialty all right. She knew all about our town
before it was founded. And you bet she knows the
family tree of everybody in that town, in all its
branches. Little incidents in their lives, you know
——the number of times they've been arrested, for
instance. Pop only stuck her once on history, and
even then he felt so sheepish he wouldn't look at
anybody for weeks. Of course he could only see a
little out of one eye, but nevertheless—=
AMERICA’S BEST
Not only the leading authors, but the most
famous artists as well, are contributing to
make the '
Free Fiction Magazine
Of
Hearst’s Sunday American
A Noteworthy Pu?lication.
By Our Own Staff of Correspondents
Copyright, 1914, bty the Star Company. Great Britain Rights Reverved
MOUNTAIN STATION.
RS. ARCHIBALD SMYTHE, of New Rochell, which she says lis
M the largest city next to New York, is heres once more at the
Lookout House. This 18 her fifth season. She says she comes
here for rose fever. From the way she talks I think she got it
Next week our train service will be inereased one-third, as usual, at
the beginning of the Summer boarder season, thanks to the enterprise
of the general superintendent. The customary train, consisting of en
gine, combination baggage and passenger car and freight car will be
augmented by a milk car, which brings mflk from the city for all the
resort stations in this- county.
SOUTH-PARADISE. ; 5
Mrs. Ephraim Sawyer, who owns Morning Glory Farm, has bduflt
elght bowers and set them up in her apple orchard. Sheq says she only
had one bower last season, and her bearders were aliways quatreling
about who should have it. As & result there were only three emgage
ments. She says that she can’t get gingle women to come to her house
for the Summer unless she gives them a chance. Your correspondent
fixed up some signs for her like those on & taxey cab in the city, which
can he shifted to read “Vacant” or “Engaged.” We thought the word
“Engaged” was mighty appropriate.
Cyrus Welliver, who runs the general store, has just laid in eight
dollars’ worth of stamps for the Summer season, and alsc a nice Ifne of
canned goods, souvenir cards and candy. He has got some real stylish
candy; some of it is swell, being done up in pasteboard boxes.
(To Editor—l know this is a sert of free advertisement, but as Cyrus
{s the postmaster hers he will let me read all the postal cards and I can
gettlototnew-.soitwfllmmtolat'hh:omjnstuthou‘h it
was real news.)
LAKE PUNKESTBYGOSH. ‘:iwm’.
There’'s no news from this famous resort at present.
‘Wallace Barlow, of the Hotel Punky, is going ts put electrie lights
in his place just as soon as an electric railway is built near enongh to
the town so he can wire the hotel.
Albert Willis broke two of his legs-Saturday falling off the roof of
his barn.
Dr. Benjamin Clark died suddenly at his homse on Fork Roads last
Thursday after being sick a year and a half.
The Upper Corner Meeting House was struck by lightning and
burned. William Jenkins, who was shingling the steeple, was also killed.
Your correspondent expects there will be some Summer boarders
arrive here soon, when he hopes to be able to send in some news.
MEADOWBROOKE.
There is an important lot of changes in our time table here. Our
train service is greatly changed, because our train, which used to be
schednled to arrive at 8:02 every a. . and go back at 5:55, will arrive
at 8:07 and go back at 5:086.
WETHURST-BY-THE-SEA.
Joseph Stmmons, who ran the Wethurst Imm last Summer, has
bought Eel Island and changed the name to Isle de Grande. He says
some of his boarders skipped out last year without paying up, but if he
gets them on an island they wom't be able to do that again.
LONG VALLEY. ¢
Your correspondent visited all the hotels and tnns and farms tn this
vicinity and learned that most of them had booked many boarders. These
will arrive within a week or so, when there will be plenty aof news.
A Mr. Cohen, professor of Swedish gymnastics, is stopping at the
valley House in North Hillburg.
GOSHDUNQUIT.
Cap'n Ezra Winters, our genlai prop. of the Goshdunquit House, has
painted his'famous hostelry and informs your correspondent that his
rates will be $3 a week more on that account. The Reverend Meeder
wants him to fasten his little beach bath houses down firm, but Cap'n
Winters won't do it. Last Summer three of them blew over in a sudden
gale just as the Misses McKutie and Mrs. Dasher were in them trying to
get out of their wet bathing suits. There was an awful lot of cxcitement
at the time. The Reverend Meeder says he fears a similar cataclysm
will occur this year. But the Cap'n won’t fasten them down. Every one
hereabouts says Cap’n Winters is a keen business man.
METUNKANMENUNKY.
Last Summer the Metunkamenunky House was closed by Danfel
Perkins. Mr. Perkins was not the proprietor, only the sheriff. This year
the house will be opened by Mr. Clarence Nodome, who has been hired
as manager by the receivers.
The widow Atkinson has already opened her home and has two
boarders. She has put a sign on it calling 1t *Cheessboro Cottage.” When
Editor Bungle, of the Metunkamenunky Mercury, printed an item about
this and called it the “Cottage Cheese,” the Widow Atkinson called at
his sanctum. She was unaccompanied except for a horsewhip. No one
knows just what was said, although Bill Hepp, the blacksmith, says he
heard Editor Bungle howling, and Bill was a quarter of a mile down
the road. At any rate, the Widow Atkinson is to get a free advertise
ment every week this Summer.
WIFFLE MARBOR.
Wesley Corliss, who runs the Corliss Farm and is making a fortune
taking Summer boarders, says he {s booked up full for the season. Wes
ley is generally that way. Two years ago he used to get his liquor from
a boatman who lowered it in lobster pots in a jug. Last season Wes’
kept getting carload after carload of cabbages. We didn’t learn until the
Fall that there was a bottle of liguor inside each cabbage head, the cab~
bages being scooped out. Everybody’s wondering how Wes' will beat
the Prohitition law this year. He always has a spirited crowd at his
place.
WIDE BEACH.
Hiram Smith’s Sea View Hotel has been thoroughly renovated this
Spring. Hiram has got a real glass cigar case for his office and a big
art calendar which came with soap for his parlor. Wa lfke to see our
citizens so enterprising.
A lady has come to the Wavelet Inn for the Summer. When we
called on her for her name she hesitated and admitted she wasn't sure
yet. Then she explained that she didn’t know whether the court weuld
allow her to resume her maiden name or not,
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