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THURSDAY, OCTOBER 12, 1916.-
BARON BEAN
MERCIFUL GOODAESS, ' BARGY' THAT'S HIM OVER ‘
IS \r Possißia SOME Body “THERR.,"SRIMES*
ATTACKED. You T YoU WHO L You 60, AND ASKK
FRED UPOA* TIBER STEAKS* HiM WHERR: HB Gar
ROAST (EGS OF (EOPARD, Al TWAT FEROATY,
| AND SUCH = MYy WHO
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BRINGING U¥ rATHER
FOR GOODNESS
SAKE ,WHAT ARE
YOouU DOING WATH
THOSE OVERALLS
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C MAGGIE - I'™M
% 4OIN OUT AN'
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POLLY AND HER PALS
M WORRIED ABOUT.'Paog, EREAT @As!fiirflow
MR. 10DD. HE AT ‘/W A %FES&OJAL
SET Edodew B FEEO L M (MTER To HA
|| 4 MosGuTe SWCE| | - AppETiTE as A HOUSE
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US BOYS
ST TVE HEARD ABGUT YADR || HERMAN HOBAW,
ELé&ANIé Jaß! ISNT THAT J | BULL FROG SMTH
LAUELY {~ AND SO YOURE [ { HUMPY HIMES
GAING TO GIUE A LaLLy | |FIOGETs O REL,
ROP SOGIAL WHEN YOO’ e e |
Get PAD! WELL WEL, 1 1K FAGIN. -
AND @HO ALL 1S SKINKS MULSHAY
INUITED, MAY S S, HOKS — :
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“ODR TRADE MARK
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A Good Market. ‘
In full view of the crowd in a very
pusy street, tWo vendors of berries were
pusy with piles of thin wooden boxes,
each scantily filled with immature fruit.
Emptying boX after box, the vendors
deftly punched uP one layer of the box
hottom to a sharp angle painted in the
midale propped it there with paper, and
then ref lled the receptacle, taking great
care that the finest and freshest looking
perries chould make a gshowy top cov
ering
One of the gpectators grew indignant.
wHow In the world,” he demanded,
wdo you expect t 0 <ell your wares when
vou openly <how that they are not what
they seem t 0 be?"”
GAW, g wan,” said the vendor ad
dressed. T his is New Yyork, and there
@re more trains coming with more peo
ple.”
TS s
@ GOAT GRABBERS
o G wATTprNERvE THE GINK
M WHO BUTTS IN AHEAD OF THE
O LINE AT THE POST OFFICE,
s HANDS OUER A DOLLAR BILL,
» AND ASKS FOR A ONE CENT
F R STAMP. OOOH! __ FROM E.W.
The Truth. |
A Southern judge, famed for his se
verity and hfs uncompromising loyalty
to the traditioms of procedure, had to
try a case in which one of the witnesses
happened to be an actress of no small
popularity in the South. It chanced
that the nature of her evidence was
such that the usual question about her
age was not likely to be omitted, so
when sghe came to the stand his honor
told the court clerk to suspend action
for a moment; then, turning to the ac
tress, he sald:
~ “Madame, how old are you?”’
. “Twenty-six,” said the lady, who is 36
if she is a day.
| “Very well,” sald the judge, politely.
T asked you that question because, iT 1
hadn't, it would surely have been asked
you when the attorney for the defense
cross-examined you. And now that you
have told us your age, do you swear to
tell the truth, the whole truth and
nothing but the truth?"
e ‘BARON . SR, HE WHOM YU
{JusSr CHASTISED, PEEDS UPON TR
| MBATS OF THe MoST FEROQOUS
ANIMALS , AAD As YoU,
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B Haow LboA WHAT ‘You
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Great Britain Rights Reserved.
}?smgjaéfi IMPoSSIBLE Y
OF MILK T KetP Df‘;’: M?S'.
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Reglstersd U. 8. Patent Offica
TISTA i) 5
MINVTE,
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K i ’A‘Z‘OV- Ay
.58 .")l .‘ ',:/
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———_—________—-—-—-———_—'_
A Retroactive Blessing.
A Boston man tells of an old-timse dea
con in Massachusetts known for the
lengthy blessing which at his table was
the unfailing prelude to every meal. His
hired man, Tom Morgan, an unconverted
and impatient youth, had fallen into
the habit of commencing his meal before
the blessing had been fully invoked.
The frown and rebuke of the deacon
were of no avail In effecting the desired
reform. Righteously indignant, the dea
con at length gave utterance to this
petition to the Deity:
“For what we are about to receive,
and for what Thomas Morgan has al
ready recelved, accept our thanks."”
ie s gt
Checqued.
~ “My son, I must put a check on your
reckless expenditures.”
“All rght, dad, but it will have to bel
in four figures.”
Copyright, 1016, Tntermatioma] News Servioa
Lcopyright, 1916, International News Service. Registered U. 5. Patent Office.
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MISTER - WHEN YOU 3
ARE THROUGH WORKING :‘4882:‘
HERE -I'D LIKE TO HIRE e
YoU TO COME OVER
AND FiX, UP OUR PLACE
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_THE ATLANTA GEORGTAN-
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Women Unsettle a Man, Whether He Hates 'Em or Loves’Em
FIDEALTIALLY OLE 7 o
M-l.‘ s “THese ALAS. Tis \\}?‘ l
DaciGonlt WM ~TRue ? ‘
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Up to Them.
Littls James, aged 6, had been taught
to pray each night for all his relatives
and friends, and consequently the list
had grown quite lar?e. 80 one night
when it came time for the customary
prayers he refused to say them,
“Well, well, James!" said his mother.
“Why don’t you say them? All good
little bots say their prayers.”
“Yes, but I'm too tired.”
“Oh, my, that's no eXcuse. Come
now, that's a good boy.”
“Well,"” relented James, ‘1 guess rn
have to. But, anyhow, I'm not going to
pray for everybodg'. T'm going to cut
a lot of 'em out. Some of ‘em will have
to save themselves.”
e
Had Some.
“And have you had any experience
with children?’ inquired the woman,
whn was about to engage a nurse.
~ "Shure, O hov,” returned ths appli
cant with a broad smile. “Wasn’t Of
wan meself wanst®
OM! SIR - S
| BEG YOUR WELL. 0
PARDON - YOU BY QOoL.LY!
DONT LOOK v wibL!
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Shrimp Isn’t Thinking Entireiy of Skinny’s Welfare
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Amswer To Vyeotandaus~ Bk o
HOWw CAN YOU SHOOT ONE o FROM OLD SETTLER- SEATTLE, WASH.
;‘%NDRETQO tAAREg AT och . WHY WauLD AN owL BE SORE?
IRE | Wi &, AND ¢ £
Fiß% p'é‘u. e LA ANG IF YOU CALLED HIM A PHEASANT
e OONT THIANC o MocH ANSWER TO-MORRAW . 2
Cause of the Collapse.
The foreman employed by a blg ocon
tractor rushed into the office of the
boss, wild-eyed and palpltating.
“Boss,” sald he, in a greatly agitated
volce, “‘one of thera new houses of ours
fell down in the night!”
~ “What's that?’ exclaimed the boss,
jumping right up and beginning to take
‘notice. “What was the matter? How
‘did it happen?”
‘lt was the fault of the workmen,
boss,” answered the foreman. “They
made the mistake of taking down the
scaffolding befors they put on the wall
paper.”
it gttt
Good Company.
“Is that little boy I saw you pla&ln‘
with this afternoon a good boy, Wil
-IHe?’ asked his mother.
“No,” replied Willle, *“‘he ain’t much
good, but he's the only boy around that
1 can liek.”
3 %
'Lucky for the Baron It Was No More
IS TaT
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In Agreement So Far.
A judge famous for his wit once had
a case before him in which the plain
tiff was represented by a very nervous
young lawyer. When the lawyer rose
to begin his address to the flur~y he
stammered out, “My unfortunate
cllent—'" and there he stuck. He tried
again, and In a shaking volce he man
aged to say, My unfortunate client—"
and could ?‘at no farther. Clearing his
throat, he had another try and for the
third time quavered out, “My unfortu
nate client "’ and again his volce failed.
“Come, come, Mr. —" said his
lordship, “proceed with your statementl
So far the court agrees with you!”
ittt
The Cult of Fashion.
Young lady at the theater, to friend:
“What w 0 you think of this play, my
dear?’
“Why, it's absurd! Three months are
supposed to pass bhetween the first and
second acts, and the heroine’'s still got
the same hat on!”
By George McManus
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His Experiment. l
A certain college president wore side
whiskers. Whenever he suggested re-‘
moving them, there was a division of
opinion in the family. One morning he
antered his wife's dressing room, razor
in hand, with his right cheek shaved
smooth,
“How do you like !¢, my dear?’ he
asked. “If you think it looks well, I
will shave the other stae, too."”
Where Knowledge Failed.
“0f course,” sald Farmer Corntassel,
“Jos:'s superior knowledge is a great
thing."
"l‘gnn't you thirit it has praoctical
value?"’
“Yes, T suppose it has. But I noticed
this affernoon that his bein’ able to call
a yellerjacket by his real scientific name
didn’t make the critter a bit more sO
- or forb~=='~’
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A Delightful Surprise.
“I was a good girl, mamma,” #&n
nounced Lucills on her return from her
first party, “and talked nice all the
time."”’
“And did you say something nice to
Mrs. Appleby Dbefore leaving?" asked
her mother.
«1 sure did,” sald Lucllle proudly. -
sald, ‘I had a lovely time, Mrs. Apple
by, and had !ots more to eat than I ex
pected.’ "’
———————
A Berious Case.
“you call yourself a heart specialist?’
sald the patient when he had recover~
ed consciousness. >
l"l certainly do,” answered the physi
clan.
“Then you ouiht to know better than
to present a bill like this to a man in
my condition.” %,